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iHiöMetoton i-iuii ♦ NO. IT. MIDDLETOWN, DELAWARE, SATURDAY MORNING, APRIL 24, 1875. VOL. VIII. VOL. VIII. JUliddlftoicn Dtrwtors. CORPORATION OFFICERS. Town Commissioners— E. W. Lockwood, President ; J. R. Hall, Secretary ; L. P. Mc Dowell, J. H. Walker, L G. Vnndegrift. Assessor —C. E. Anderson. Treascrrr —Joseph Hansen. Justice of tbs Peace.— DeW. C. W alker. Constable and Policeman.— R. H. Foster. Lamplighter. — F. C. Schmitz. NOTARY PUBLIC. John A. Reynolds. TRUSTEES OF THE ACADEMY. Hon John P. Cochran, Pres. ; Henry Dans, Treas. ; Samuel Penington, Secretary ; James Kanaiy, B. Gibbs, R. T. Cochrsn, 1 vacancy. Principal or Academv. — L. B. Jones. OFFICERS OF CITIZENS' NATL BANK. Directors. —Henry Clayton, B. Gibbs, B. T Bizes, John A. Remolds, James Culbert , E. C. Fenimore, M. K. Walker, J. B. Cazier, Joseph Biggs. President. —Henry Clayton, Cashier. — J. R. Hall. Teller. —John S. Crouch. son DIRECTORS OF TOWN HALL CO. J. M. Cox, Pres ; Samuel Peaington, See.; J. R. Halt, Treas.; R. A. Cochran, Jas. Cul bertson. Jas.H. Scowdrick, Wm. H. Barr. CHURCHES Forest Presbyterian.—Rot. John Patton, D. D., Pastor. Divine service every Sunday at 18.30 a. m. and 7.00 p. m. Sunday School at 9 a. m. Lecture on Wednesdays at 7.30 p. m. Sunday School ia the Chapel at Arm strong's every Sunday at 2.30 p. ra. St Anne's Protestant Episcopal. —Kev. Wm. C. Butler, Rector. Service on Sundays at 10.30 a.m. Suaday School at 4.00 p. m. Lecture ou Fridays at 4 p. m. Methodist Episcopal, —Rev. L. C. Matlack, D. D., Pastor. Service every Sunday at 10.30 a m and 7.30 p m. Sunday School at 9.30 a. m. and 2.30 p. m. Prayer Meeting on Thursdays at 7.30 p.®. Colored Methodist.— Rev J. W. Brown, Pastor. Service every other Sunday at 10.30 a. m.; 3 and 8 p. m. Sunday School every Sunday at 1 p. m. MASONIC Meets Adoniram Chapter No. S, R. A. M. in Masenis Hall on the second and fourth^n davs of everv month at 8 o'clock, p m. Union Lodge No. 5, A. F. A. M. Meets on the first and third Tuesdays of every month at 8 o'clock, p. m., Masonic Hall. KNIGHTS OF- PYTHIAS. Damob Lodge, No. 12 Meets every Friday Lodge room in the evening at 8 o'clock. Town Hall. PATRONS OF HUSBANDRY. Peach Blossom Gbange, No. 3. Meets every Tuesday even hi g at 7 o'clock. Grange Room with Knights of Pythias. I. O. O. F. Good Samaritan Lodge, No 9. Meets every Thursday evening at 8 o'clock. Lodge Room in Cochran Hall, No. 2, Cochran Square. BUILDING AND LOAN. Middletown B. A L. Association. —Samuel Ptnington, Pres.; A. G. Cox, Secretary. Meets the first Thursday of every month at 8 o'clock, p.m. Mutual Loan Association of Middletown. —Jas. H. Scowdrick, Pres.; A. G. Cox, See Meets on the third Tuesday ef every on rotary. moBth at 8 o'clock, p. m. MIDDLETOWN LIBRARY AND READING-ROOM. E W. Lockwood, Pres.; J. T. Budd, Sec'y ; Rooms ia Transcript Building. Reading Room open every day until 10 o'clock, p m. Library open on Wednesdays and Saturdays from 3 o'clock to 5 p m. AGRICULTURAL ASSOCIATION. Penins. Agricultural and Pomological As sociation. —Charles Beasteu, President ; J. T. Budd, Seeretary ; Wm. R Cochran, Chairman of Board of Managers. Annual Meeting third Saturday in Jaanary. Fair ofl 875, October 5, 6, 7 and 8. DIAMOND STATE BRASS BAND. Meets for practice every Monday evening at 8 o'clock. POST OFFICE. Office Hours. —Opens at 6.30 a ra and closes at 9 p m erery day except Sunday Mailt for the North close at 8.45 a m, aod 2.15 pm. Mail for the South closes at 11 a m. Mails for Odessa close at 11.20 a m *nd 7.30 p m. Mails for Warwick, Sassafras and CsciltoD close at 11.20 a tn. DELAWARE RAILROAD Passenger trains going North leave at 9.10 a m and 2 39 p ra. ; going South at 11.27 a m Freight trains with passenger sad 7.55 p m. car attached, going Nerlh, leave at 5.24 p m ; going Sooth, at €.30 a m. STAGE LINES Stage for Odessa, with U. S. Mail, leaves shortly after arrival of the 11.27 am aad 7.55 p m mail trains. Stages for Warwick, Sassafras and Cecilton leave shortly after arrival of the 11.27 a m train,. ___ FURNITURE. UNDERTAKING. UPHOLSTERING. The undersigned respectfully announces to tbs eitisens of Middletown and vicinity that he has on hand a large and well selected stock of handsome and durable Walnut and Other Fnrnitnre, which he will sell very cheap for cash. Buy iag at wholesale cash rates he feels assured that he can tell as low as the same goods can be bought elsewhere. By baying ofhim pur chasers will be saved the freight on their goods from the city. He is also prepared to attend to Undertaking Work at short notice, and in a manner excelled by none. Persons wishing Metallic or Wood en Caskets or Chtes will find it to their ad vantage to call on him. He has, also, TAYLOR k SOW'S Celebrated Corpse Preserver, The Corpse may be dressed in the finest fab rics and not be soiled, (and can be seen at all times) as nothing bnt dry cold air enters the Casket. GEORGE W. WILSON, Practical Cabinet Maker and Undertaker, Middletown Del. Febl-12m PURE GROUND RAW BONE Furnished by car in lots of five tons and upwards, or smaller quantities from store.— Parties ordering early will get all the benefits Also, materials for maou alwavs oo band. Prices of lowest prices. A factnring Phosphate as low as the lowest, quality as good as the best. Orders sad inquiries by mail promptly attended to. J. A. CRANSTON, Feb 13-tjnnl. Newport, Del. fJoetrg. ALAS FOR IT! 1 wish I were dead, and 9tewed away To slumber in peace till the judgment day, With other respectable sinners ; For life is becoming a burden et woe, My appetite fails, and vainly I go To the most irreproachable dinners. I cùnot enjoy what I cannot digest, I'm losing my reason, I'm losing my rest, I'm fading away by inches ; I'm drowned in a flood of moral slush, Into which women and parsons rush, And chatter like lunatic finches. The thing that has clouded my sunny days, Until my soul's ethereal rays Are faint as a tallow candle. Is wh'spered, and shonted, and moaned, and sung, By every mortal, in every tongue, And is known as the Brooklyn Scandal. At home or abroad, 'tis still the same, That cussed mixture of folly atlfl shame Is ever before our faces ; And pans and riddles, and wretched rhymes Are said and sung at all sorts of times, And in most inappropriate places. My wife was a prude, and sternly frowned On words of improper or doubtful soaud With womanly indignation ; She glanced at Boccaccio's tales one day, Read but a page, then fainted away, In virtuous agitation. And as for Rabelais' jolly book, I thought I would die when I saw the look She cast at the sad old fellow ; The hair stood up on her graceful head, Her eyes turned green, and her nose was red, And her cheeks of a decent yellow. But now, God help us, you'd scarcely know— Unless an angel told yon so— That my wife is a modest creature ! For all day long, by the parlor fire, She dabbles away in the Brooklyn mire, And gloats o'er each prurient feature. Or with some spinster sour and thin, Who reads the Bible in search of sin, And groans at the revelations, She talks of inwardness and of spheres, Spiritual love and clerical tsars, And other abominations. Hei pleasure, however, is mixed with pain ; The trial must finish, and she would fain Have its thrilling joys eternal, For she hungers as if for the bread of life, After gush and lies and lewdneas and strife And perjnry infernal. Oh, would I might fly to the realms of gloom, And live alone till the day of doom— A moderaized sort of Alastor ; With transports of bliss I would bid adieu To Tilton and Woodhull, and all thvir crow, And their well-loved Plymouth pastor. C. II. O , in N. T. Sim. For the Transcript. LATTER DAY SAINTS. The "Church of Jeans Christ of Lat ttr Day Saints" is the name the Mor give to their Church. It was founded upon direct revelation it is claimed. Joseph Smith, the "prophet, 1 born in the town of Sharen. Windsor the 23d of De mona wa* county, Vermont, on eernber, 1805. Hi* father was a farmer. When about the age of fourteen, he be gan to reflect upon the importance of being prepared for a future state. He found that there was a great clash in religions sentiment, each society point ing to its own particular creed as the only perfect one. Conaidering that all eould not be right, and that God could not be the author of so much confusion, be determined to investigate the sub ject more fully. Believing the word of God, he had confidence in the declara tion of James, "If any man lack wisdom let him ask ef God who giveth to all men liberally and upbraideth not, and it shall be given him." He retired to a secret plaoe in a grove and began to call upon tho Lord, while fervently engaged in prayer his mind was taken away from the objects which surrounded him, and he was en rapt iD a heavenly vision, he was sur rounded by a brilliant light which eclipsed the sun at noon-day. In a mo ment a person stood before him sur rounded by a glory yet greater than that which already filled the place. This messenger proclaimed himself to be an angel of God, sent to bring the joyful tidings that the covenant which God made with ancient Israel waa at hand to be fulfilled ; that the prépara- : tory work for the second coming of the ' Messiah was speedily to take place ; that the time was at baud for the Gospel, in all its fullness,to be preached j io power unto all nations, that people ! might be prepared for the millennial i reeeived a revelation concerning the aboriginal inhabitants of this country, bnt it is so. He was given a brief sketch of their origin, progress, cjvili zation, laws, governments; of their righteousness and inequity, and the blessing of God being finally withdrawn from them as a people. He was told where there was deposited some plates on which was engraved an abridgment, of the reOord of the ancient propheti that had existed en this continent. On the 22d of September, 1827, the angel of the Lord delivered the records into These records were engraved on reign. Smith was informed that he was tbs chosen instrument in the hands of God, to bring about some of his purposes in this glorious dispensation. It is curi ous that Smith should claim to have his hands. plates which had the appearance el gold, each plate was aix inches by eight, and not quite so thick as com- | mon tin. They were filled with en cravings in Egyptian characters and bound together in a volume like the leaves of a book with three rings run ning through the whole The volume something near six inches in thick ness, a part of which was sealed. The characters on the unsealed part were small and beautifully engraved. j In this important and interesting ! book the history of ancient America is I unfolded, from its first settlement by a | from the tower of was coloDy that came Babel, at the confusion of tongues, to the beginning of the fifth eentury of the Christian era. The first were called Jaredites, aDd direct from the tower of Babel The second race came directly from the city of Jerusalem, about six hundred years before Christ. They were prin cipally Israelites of'the descendants of Joseph. It is a great loss to us that this interesting book does not reveal to the route taken by the Israelites in passing from Jerusalem to America. The Jaredites were destroyed about the time the Israelites came, who suc ceeded them in their inheritance. By whom the Jaredites were destroyed, Smith does not say, nor does he leave the inference that they were destroyed came us by the Israelites. The principal nation ot the second , race fell in battle towards the close of 1 the fourth century of the Christian era. ; The remnant are the Indians of this j country This Book also tells us that our j Saviour made his appearance on this continent after his resurrection ; that priesthood, the same ordinances as were enjoyed on the eastern continent, that the people were cast off because of their transgression; that the last of these prophets who existed among them, were commanded to write an abridg ment of their propel», hiztories, &c., "and to hide it up tb the earth, and that it should come forth and be united with the Bible for the aceomplishment of the purposes of Gad in the last days " On the 6th 'of April, 1830, the "Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints," was first organized in the town of Manchester, State of New York, Some few were called and ordained by the spirit of revelation and prophecy, and began to preach. They saw visions and prophesied, cast out devils and healed the sick by the "laying on of ; hands." The following are the essential points of the Mormon creed, and differ but he planted His Gospel here in all its fullness, richness aDd power ; that they bad apostles, prophets, pastors aiäd teachers ; the same order, the same "We believe in God the Eternal j Father, and in Jesus Christ his Son, j and in the Holy Ghost." "We believe that all men will be little from orthodox denomination, viz: : j punished for their own sins, and not for j the transgression of Adam." i "We believe that through the atone- ; ment of Christ all men may be saved ■ by obedience to the laws and ordinances I of the Gospel. j "We believe these ordinances to be : 1st, F.ith in Our Lord Jesus Christ ; ! 2d, Repentance ; 3d, Baptism by im- j tnersion for the remission of sins ; 4th, I j ; Laying on of hands for the gift of the Holy Ghost Wo believe in the gift of prophecy, of tongues, revelations, visions, healing, &c." "We believe in the word of God so ! far as it is translated correqtly ; we believe the Book of Mirtnon to be the 1 word of God. as well to quote here from the language of our Saviour'as found in the 24th ; Matthew, 23 and 24 verses : "Then if any man shall say unto you—Lo here is Christ, or there ; believe it not." "For there shall arise false Christs and false prophets, and shall show great signs and wonders ; insomuch that if it were possible they shall de ceive the very elect." A sensation in Mormondora has been Perhaps it would be This : created by the apostasy of the 19th wife ' of Bringham Young, the president, prephet and seer of the church, woman was born at Navoo, III., in j j 1844. Her mother, at the time of her ; ! marriage, was teaching school in Ohio, j though she was a native of eastern New i York. Her parents early became con verts to the teachings of Joe Smith, ; and faithfully followed that prophet nntil hii death, and removed to Utah, in 1848. Ann Eliza, though thirty one, does not appear more than twenty five. Born in the Mormon Church she had its doctrines instilled into her mind by a hopeful trusting mother, she heard the Gentiles and their religion con demned and was taught to believe that Mormonism would prevail and spread through all the earth. Under the direction and laboring of Saints, she saw "the deserts made to blossom as the rose" towns and cities spring up, and , j from a handful of followers the Church can now count two hundred thousand ■ in Salt Lake. Mines have been devel I eped, vineyards planted, fields reclaim ed by the art of irrigation, and the sandy wastes made fertile beyond con At the age of aixteen. sbe wa* Uken ' j eeption. | to the "Endowment House" and bap tised. This was her second baptism, and it was attended with solemn rites and ceremonies, signs, grips and pass words are given; and the candidate is sworn to hostility to the United States and in questioning obedience to the Mormon Church given them by which they will be j known, not in this world but in Heaven, ! hers was "Sarah ." I This baptism makes them "fit meat | for the Lord," and they are afterwards marriageable The question is often asked—"does it not do violence to a A new Dime is woman's feelings, a mother's love, to give herself, her daughter to one already married to several wives, does, but it is their religion, are instructed to believe that the great It They est honor on earth and the greatest happiness in Heaven would result from a marriage with the head of the Church This is the teaching, but the practice does net bear it out. Jealousy makes life miserable, and to the brave and the daath is ever a welcome visitor of a as pious After her marriage with Brigham, he gave her a house in Salt Lake City, and furnished it with musliu eurtains to the windows, a pine table, two or three benches of the same material, and set of "chinaware that he'had saved She was from a shut-up bakery. , a ])owed credit at a store owned in part 1 or ent j r# by Brigham, for thirty dol ; ] ars a y ear . j After living in Salt Lake City for a time, Brigham requested Ann Eliza to his farm at j aod ber mot b e r to g° South Cotton Wood, six miles from Salt Lake, and take charge of his dairy. This was no small task. They went and the mother made butler and cheese from forty cows. Ann Eliza's part was to drive up to Salt Lake, three times a weekj t0 gupp ]y Brigham's other wires w jth butter and milk. After working in tb ; g da j ry f or gome months, the ..Mother" was prostrated by a pro traded illness. No inquiries were made fey tbe a ff* c tionate son-in-law for his wife > 8 roo ther, bat the wife was directed to inform the mother that he. Brigham, cou ] d support her iD idleness no longer, b j g expenses were heavy and his income on j y (£40.000) forty thousand a month. j t be said to Ann Eliza's credit that she dung close to her mother, and re fused for once to obey the man who gtood to her in the majestic attitude of father, husband and priest. She left the farm, and with her mother, removed t0 g a j t and occupied a cottage ,hen recently built by Brigham. She ; ob t a ined his consent to keep boarders, aD( j b y this means was enabled to sup port h er mother and herself in some degree of comfort. The near relations which she held to j Brigham YouDg, gave her the opper j tunity t0 study b is character, Now bis : great greed of money, his covetousness, j his meanness, his baseness of character j in that wag evi , could be> bu t, too i plainly seen. How could the religion ; be pQre #ince the channe i througb ■ whjch the wi „ of the Lord was madc I known unt0 them wflg corrupt , The j darkness 0 f distrust now began to settle down apon her ooee conteutad mind . ! Could u ^ that h „ religion wag fâlief j , bat ber ^ relifion wag a lie ? I She now questioned where faith before had led her blindly. Suspicion once sroused, proof followed quickly About this time one of the apostles got sick It had been said by him aDd for him j that he would never die ; that when his work on earth was finished he would be caught up into Heaven—like Elijah, and he had a ring made with this motto ; engraved on it, ! 1 ; "God and 1 Will never die." But he did die, poor fellow, like other mortals, and was followed to the grave by hundreds of sorrowing SaiDts. On an other occasion Add Eliza was aifiieted with some ehronic disease of a painful nature, and being told that if she would go to the "Endowment House" and be baptised the disease and pain would instantly depart Sbe did as directed but the only effect was a severe cold. j ; dupe. j her to Salt Lake, but where could sbe go, to whom could she turn? Now came the trial of her life, could she ; turn her back upon her mother, from whom she had never been separated in her life ; turn her back upon her broth er, for whom she cherished the sincer upon every friend on earth and te go forth alone into the world, among strangers, to wander she knew not where, to get her bread the knew not j a how? Out of Utah she had not a re- j lative, friend or acquaintance. But she had determined to live a lie no ! longer ; she resolved to be free, and any one who sees this womao Will not ; , doubt her fearful determination to be free or die j First of all she must get rid of her | mother. She repeated to her the mes sage of Brigham while she lay sick at the Cotton W ood Farm. The mother, a high-spirited woman, set out from B Salt Lake at once and repaired to the ! ' home of her husband who was living Ann Eliza now saw that she was a She loathed the ties that bound est sisterly affections ; turn ber back distance from Salt Lake with an some other wife. After the departure of her mother, Ann Eliza went to the Gen tiles' Hotel.'and threw herself upon their generosity and claimed their protection. Three years ago she would uot dared to have done this, nor would the life of the gentile giving her an asylum been worth the snap of ones finger. Judge McKeen threw around her the strong arm of the law. friends newly made flocked around her and, for a But at time at least, she was safe, last she was compelled to seek safety in flight. One dark night a close car riage was procured and thickly vailed she entered it, escorted by a few trusty friends she was driven rapidly aDd secretly away from Salt Lake to the Union Pacific Railroad fifty miles away. Who can eomprehend the emotion of this young woman, as she was thus berne away she knew not whither, to a life—what? She knew not. it to of by a is a Ann Eliza has sued for a divorce, but as she says, "Mormon money often outweighs justice in the scales " As a lecturer Ann Eliza is eue of the most attractive on the platform. No hall, io any of the cities in which she bas lectured, has been found large enough to contain the crowds that flock to hear her. She is modest and lady like, and there is an entire absence of any thing "stagy,''her lecture is de livered in a pleasant conversational style and in the choicest of language but without any attempt at oratory. She is of medium height, light and graceful as a fawn, hut it is off the stage that she shows to the best advant age : her head is beautifully shaped,her hair dark and wavy, eyes large, full and dark olive ; mouth large but her lips are thin and red, her jaws are deep but round into a beautiful chin. The contour of the woman's face and head indicates courage of the highest order, a will and force of the kind that will "conquer or die." When at rest her eyelids droop and the corners of the mouth are drawn as though she was in pain. When spoken to kindly she starts like a deer, her eyes open wide, and flash, her lips compress, her nostrials dilate, her respiration is quick, but, if the ques tion is an ordinary one, calming down she will answer in words as sweet as music. It is strange indeed, that whtfn her faith in Brigham and the Mormon church was shaken she did not turn her back upon all other denominations and denounce them all as false, such however is not the fact. She sought the true and living light as it is taught iD the New Testament, and has realized the truth of the text, that those who seek shall find. Ann Eliza now has the great joy of knowing that her mother has re nounced the Mormon faith,aod that she, too, is safe in Gentile hands. Very much depends upon this suit of Mrs. Young, for should the courts grant her a divorce with alimony hundreds of other Mormon wives will follow her example and the corner-stone of Mor mondom will be thrown to the ground. til to to to it of " Be it Gwine for to Jine the Band." The other night a Fayetteville gen tleman was greatly disturbed by a dis mal howling iD his kitchen, which he at first supposed was the refrain of some low-spirited tom-cat dyiDg with the broDehitis. Traoing up the noise he found it proceeded from an old negro woman who was rocking back ward and forward in a chair, singing as her feeble lungs would allow. "What are you doing, Aunt Peggy?" exclaimed the irate Fayettevillian. "I'm a singing of a bime, honey." "The D-—1 you are, what 'hime' are you singing ?" "1'm a singing, 'I'm gwine for to jine the band ' " "Well, I'd like to know what band you are 'gwine for to jine ?" "De angel band, honey— de Lord's band !" "Now, you'd make a nice angel, wouldn't you, with the dirt an inch thick on your hide ?" "Neber mind about de dirt, honey," piously ejeculated Aunt Peggy ; neber mind about de dirt— de Lord He got plenty of soap, He bas, and runs de riber Jordan, He does—neber mind about the dirt I'm gwine for to jine—!" Here Aunt Peggy's tormenter fled, and she was left te exercise her vocal powers at discretion a n extended jidlress: "Don't drink; don't chew ; don't smoke ; don't swear ; don't deceive ; don't read novels; don't marry until you can support a wife ; be earnest ; be self-reliant ; be generous ; be civil ; read the papers ; advertise your business; make money, and do good with it; love God and your fellow-men." p f ' rCCent a man " e ■' a magistrate orstea - B ' an was ver ^ P oor ' ' 6 ma g lgtr#te Engaged for every set—a hen. a Presibknt Porter, of Yale College, recently gave the following laconic advice to the student* in the course of he i paid the fine himself part and at on Fanny Fern said: "If one-half the girls only knew the previous lives of the men they marry, the list of eld maids would be wonderfully increased. Boston Post asks: "If the men knew, Fanny, what their future lives were to be, would'nt it increase the list of old maids still further?" And may we not add that if ene-half the young ladies (knowing the lives of the men whose society they keep) were as particular in selecting a husband, as these same are in ehoosing a wife, would we not have a far better class of men in respect able circles? Yes; but men want to marry angels, (pretty looking subjects of them would be,side of an angel) The ex ed are as men last fight a a for pull row, holy "I to "a for some while we girls are expected never to ques tion into the lives of the nobler (?) sex. Oh, no! Women, good true women, cau do much toward forming the char acter of a man if they choose ; but so long as fond mammas throw wide open the doors to receive the libertine, be cause he "dresses well," is "so nice," etc., just so long will society remain as it is to-day. It is not at all necessary to turn coldly upon a roan beeause of some sin, but he should be made to feel that his life must be purer, if he would bave hopes of entering into the society of good and virtuous women. Let these men who are so very particular in se lecting a wife, ask themselvss if they would be willing to marry young ladies, whose characters would not correspond with their own. Of course not. The first whisper against women is caught by the breeze, and its flight loses noth ing, but gains enough to make a very loud report, ere it is potto rest. Hew many people ever think earnestly upon these lost women, and the position of Christian society towards them. When a little child strays from its home, every heart is stirred with grief, the whole neighborhood is filled with anxious in quiry, and when the wanderer is re stored to its parents, it hears no unkind word but is lifted in loviDg arms, and kiss upon kiss covers its tear-staiDed face. Let years pass. This same child becomes a woman. Note let her be led from the path of morality; and picture the result. She is lost at once; not strayed, but lost 'tis said, and if she re turn to her home, aDd so called friends, instead of being received in a manner to secure her from wandering again, she is at once denounced by society as ir retrievably lost, while one and all, pat forth every effort to bar the door be tween her and respectability. Why not look with less charity upoD the short comings of men, and be a little more lenient towards women, thus arriving at a "happy medium "— Golden Rule. At a the bill A out the with he a from o' like with as ting Post Office Business—How to do Wheii You go There. When you have letters to mail, wait till it is time to close the mail they are going in, or if possible, until the bags are locked, as it looks more business like to rush in just as the mail is leav ing and ask to have them put in. Never put stamps on your letters un til you get to the office, and then ask me or Colonel Fagg to lick them and put them on for you We expect to lick all the stamps used at this office, and it a source of disappointment to us when people insist on doing it them selves When you make up your tniDd to put them on yourself, lick each one two or three times so as to get all the gum off, and then ask for a little muci lage. Don't pay for the stamps nntil they are all stuck on—especialy if we are hurried, and two or three other men are waiting their turn to be waited on. This gives the postmaster a chance to rest, and those who are waiting for yon to move, will turn upon you, with faees beaming with love and approbation. If it makes no difference to you, put part of the stamps on the left-band corners, aod some on the back of your letters. This will insure yon a remembrance iD the happy youth who cancels those stamps. When you pay money at the office, try and get it upside down and wrong end foremost, so that we may amuse ourselves straightening it up be- ' fore counting it. This is one of our chief pleasures Bring us all the torn " shin-plasters " you can spare, for we like them much better than larger bills, and they are so much easier to count Be sure however, not to have the exact change. find en, you few some who liar talk some real of bling will liar it use or You can generally save time by counting your money down to us, for you wiil nearly always count it more , ong rapidly than we will. When you want b jtt a money order cashed, don't sign it cb i right the first time. If we tell you it is j b#r payable to John Smith, sign it J. i Smith it will have to be erased and cor rected This helps to pass the time, and is a pleasure and relief to the post master. j If the postmaster tells you to put two 1 b ; g cents on a paper, say to him that you have seen larger papers go for one cent, j eften. This is conclusive evidenoe that t b j he don't know how much to charge you and also that the other postmaster was , very careful about weighing his mail I sons matter. After the postmaster gives vioe i you your mail, ask him if "that ia all." | tion Postmasters are very apt to keep back 1 part of your mail,unless closely watched. A strict observanee of these rules, and a few others which cau better be plained in person when you call at the office, will make your visits desirable at any post office, and postmaster and clerks will not forget to call for blessings on you in their hourly supplications. Affectionately, yours, ed on it of the the of by the if "I ex Johnnik Aston. P. S.—The foregoing is not intend ed for handsome young ladies They are at liberty to come as often and stay as long as they please. —From Asheville (AT. C .) Expositor. J. A One of Butler's Hits. —One of the last as well a* one of the neatest hits made by General Butler, just before the close of the last session in Congress, oc curred during the famous "dead-lock" fight öd the Civil Rights bill. The question ef adjournment was under con sideration, find General Butler had stepped over to Mr. Randall's desk for a private consultation. Butler favored a Sunday session. Bandai opposed. "Bad as I am, I have some respect for God's day," said the Democrat, "and I don' think it proper to holds session on that day." "Oh, pshaw!" responded Butler, "don't the Bible say that it is lawful to pull your ox or ass out of a pit on the Sabbath day ? You have seventy-three asses on your side of the House that I want to gat out of the ditoh to-mor row, and I think I am engaged in a holy work." "Don't do it, Bntler," pleaded Sam. "I have some respect for yon that I don't want to lose. I expect seme day to meet you in a better world." "You'll be there, as you are here." retorted Butler, quiok as a thought— "a member of the lower House."— Edi tor's Drawer, in Harper's Magazine for May. English Taught in On* Lesson.— At many of the New York restaurants a very heavy "French style" is pot on, the waiters are mostly French, and the bill of fare is often printed in French. A correspondent writes that, venturing out early one morning in New York, he dropped into the first restaurant he came to, which happened to be one of the kind spoken of above. Carelessly giving an order, the waiter, bringing his shoulders up under his ears responded: "Jen' parle pas anglais, M'aieur ;" and the hungry man had to peint out his wants on the bill of fare, with which after considerable delay, he was served. Jnst here entered another customer, a tall, powerful fellow, evidently fresh from the Western prairies, who settling himself into a chair, ordered "Beef steak, fried potatoes, hot bread 'n a enp o' coffee." To him the waiter repeated the same formula : "Jen parle pas anglais, M'sieur." The Western maD looked at him for a moment, and then, rising from his seat like the opening of some big jack-knife with a stiff spring, he slowly ejaculated, as he clenched a wicked looking fist : "Beef-steak—fried potatoes-hot bread —cup of coffee, quick." The effect oa the waiter was magical. There never was a man servsd more promptly with just what he ordered for breakfast than the hungry Westerner. He evidently knew the way of put ting bis English so that there was no ' ed to fire the for ish Trials. —Not a hearthstone shall yon find on which some shadow has not fall en, or about to fall. Further than this, you will probably find that there are few households which do not cherish some sorrows not known to the world; who have not some trial of their pecu liar messenger, and which they do not talk abont, except among themselves; some hope that has been blasted ; some expectation dashed down ; some wrong, real or supposed, which some member of the household has suffered ; trem bling anxieties least that other member will not succeed ; trials from the pecu liar temperament of somebody in the house, or some environment that touches it shaeply without ; some thorn in the flesh; some physical disability 'that cripples our energies when we want to use them the most ; some spot in tho house where Death has left his track, or painful listenings to hear bis stealthy footsteps coming on.— Dr. Sears. the and the in iers ' An attendant at Mount Vernon, not , ong gincei found a , ady weeping mogt b jtt e rly and audibly, with her handker cb i e f at her eyes. He stepped up to j b#r and ga j d i "Are you in trouble, madam ?" "No, sir!" she sobbed. eric "I saw you weeping. "Ah!" said she, "how can one help j weeping at the grave of the Father of 1 b ; g country? ; madam," said he, j on The tomb's over yonder, \ her " ! told "Oh, indeed, j "that's it ! t b j g j 8 the ice house, , j P e r- j I sons employed in the British civil ser- j vioe who communicate official informa- i | tion to the newspapers am to be dis- ! 1 missed. An order has been issued that The Concord Fight. The British, somewhat scattered in small groups on the bridge and on the west bank of the river, noticing the ad vance of the Americans, immediately formed and crossed to the east bank, taking up some of the planks of the The soldiers under Captain Lawrie, who had previously retired to the hill, mov ed forward and joined their companions on the right bank of the river. The attempt of the British to dismantle the bridge attracted the attention of Major Buttrik as the Americans were advanc ing, "two and two, and turning the corner of the cross-road. He remon strated against the act in a loud and emphatic tone, and ordered his men to march in a quick step. Thereupon the enemy desisted from the destruction. They became alarmed at the menanc ing movement of the Americans ; and it may have occurred to them at the time that whatever obstructions placed in the way of the Americans would jeopardise the safety of Captain Parsons' detachment. It was, according to Captain David Brown, "between nine and ten of the clock in the forenoon." The British fired two or three guns in quick sue cessiobs. These were preconcerted signal-guns for the distant detachments of the enemy to return at once. When the Americans arrived within ten or fifteen rods of the bridge, and were rapidly moving forward, one of the regulars, a sharp shooter, stepped from the ranks and diseharged a musket, manifestly aimed at Major Buttrick or Colonel Robinson, the ball from which, passing under the arm of the latter, slightly wounded Luther Blanchard, the lifer of the Acton company, in the side, and Jonas Brown, one of the Concord minute-men. This gun was immediately followed by a volley, whioh instantly killed Captain Isaao Davis and private Abner Hesmer of Acton, a ball passing through the heart of the former, and another through the head of the latter, and slightly wonnding Ezekiel Davis, a brother of Captain Davis, a ball passing through his hat and grazing his head. When he saw that his lifer was wounded, Captain Davis impulsively stepped to the wall by the road, and was in the act of sighting his gun, when he was hit by the enemy's shot. He sprang two or three feet in the air, fell on the north side of the wall, and expired without ottering a word Brooks, of Lincoln, was struok with a ball that eut through his bat and drew blood on bis forehead. It appeared if he had been cut with a knife ; and "I concluded, "that the British knives." bridge as they passed over. were Joshua as said Private Baker, were firing jaek Major Buttrick, then in front of Cap tain Brown's company, instantly jump ed from the ground, and partly taming to his men impetuously exclaimed, "Fire, fellow-soldier* ! for God's sake fire " discharging his own gun at tho same moment. Captain Brown, who never before nor after used a profane word, exclaimed, "God damn them, they are firing balls ! Fire, men, fire !" drew up his own gun, deliberately aimed, and fired One of the dead Britsh solders, buried near the old monument, was believed to have been the result of that shot. Major But trick's order- ran along the lino of militia aBd minute-men, the word "Fire!" "Fire!' came from a hun dred lips, and a general discharge in stantly followed from the Americas. They fired as they stood, and over each ether's heads. Tho fusilade continued for a few minutes only, when tho Brit ish broke and fled in great alarm and confusion Noah Parkburst, one ef the Lincoln men, said to one of bis comrades, "Now the war and no one knows when it will end ! The fire of the Americans destructive Two British soldiers instantly killed. Four officers, Lieu tenants Gould, Hall, Sunderland, and Kelly, aDd a sergeaut aDd six privates, were reported to have been wounded at the same time It has never been curately ascertained how many privates suffered in this engagements thau a dozen had their wounds dressed in the village by Drs. Minet and Gam ings, and, of coarse, there has begun, was were ae More wer« sur geons with the expeditionary force. Many of the troops were covered with blood as they passed the hnoses on their retreat to the village, and were seen in this condition from the windows, The sudden flight of such veteran sold iers showed that the fire of tho Ameri cans, must have been very severe — From "The Concord Fight," by Fred eric Hudson, in Harper's Magazine for May. An Oswego girl met "a gentleman" on the street who persisted npon seeing her home, and then upon going in, she told him te wait outsüie a few moments. Then, from a window above, she poured down upon him a shower of boilings water, while "profanity, steam and cries of pain, loaded the air." -_-___ À table of interest—the dinner table.