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Jj|jepl)ct:i>0tottm Ucgistcr. ESTABLISHED 1849. MONTANI SEMPER LIBERI. TW? DOLLARS PER YEAR IN ADVANCE H. L. SNYDER, PUBLISHER. SHEPHERDSTOWN, W. YA., FRIDAY, AUGUST 23, 1889. XEW yOL 48. DANIEL B. LUCAS, attorney at law, t'HAKLKSTOWN W. Va. ..rjf i, practice in al.t n? Court* of Jeffer \\ *<m andadJolning ountles. Vov. 1. 1MB-W | The Entler Hotel, SHEPHERD8TOWN, W. VA., Has Been Re-opened Under a new management and with new far nlture throughout. Every effort for the comfort of guests will be made. j. v TRl'NSELL, Proprietor. Sample Room on First Floor. am; have in stock ?THE LARGEST LINE OF SUITINGS ?AND? PANTALOONINGS that we have ever shown. All NEW (SOODS ' ?no old stock? and complete in every l>articular. Wd do our own cutting Hiid make our store expenses by discounting every bill, which enables us To Meet Lowest Prices AN1> UNDERSELL MANY. Gents' Furnishing Goods Department Mull of nice things. We get novelties in this department just as they come out and are ac knowledged to l>e headquarters for these kihhIm. We are told by many that our line t-ijuals Baltimore city furnishers. You are to br the Judge in this case and we patiently wilt your decision. We will be pleased to show you our goods and will not Insist on k- iliiiK- so you can feel perfectly easy in going out without buying. GROVE BROS.,! Under Baldwin House, HAUERSTOWN. MARYLAND. WANTED Everybody to know 1 have received liiy Spring Stock of WALL PAPER. LATKST STYLES. FIRST-CLASS, RICH A> D ELEGANT. Good paper at 8c per piece of 8 yards. Better still at 10c " " " 44 44 Gold Paper !2 1-2, 15, 16, 18, 22, 25 and 30c per piece of 8 yards. setid for or call and examine them. ttr Kstimales for painting solicited. T. H. MILLER. Spring 1889 Summer The TEMPLE OF FASHION is again tilled with NEW GOODS ! H CLOTHING! I H;s Boots, Shoes I ^ Hats and Caps. Neckwear aidGlom Furnishings! Trunks, Satchels, Umbrellas and Canes. Two doors full of goods. Easy stairway and plenty of light. (jieo. 11. Hagley, CHARLESTOWN, W. VA. NOTICE TO THE PUBLIC! We the undersigned having pur chased the Undertaking Business of K. M. Billmyer have removed to the Stone Store Room, up stairs, where we are prepared to furnish at short notice Burial Cases, Caskets, Robes, Crepes, Gloves, &c., ami all goods kept in a well furnished I mlertaking Establishment. We hope by striet attention to business to merit a share of public patronage. We will continue the Painting and I'apering business as usual. Respectfully, J. FERRELL A SOX. fttf* All orders left with Mr. Bill myer will receive promp* attention. GREAT SLAUSHTER SALE! I will from this day sell my entire Stock, consisting of CLOTHING For Men, Boys and Children, GENTS' FURNISHING GOODS, Boots, Shoes, Hats, &c., AT AND BELOW COST. <"ome early and get your bargains, as all must be sold before September 1st, 1889. Now is your tiuie. J. H. MYERS, HARPER 8 FERRY, W. VA. FOR SALE. \\' have for sale about 7J4 acres of good "Limestone Laud on which there U a orchard, good dwelling and kitchen at tud oiit-biilldlUK*. Theproperty islu "erkelcy County, about 7 miles from Martins niri { (ind miles from Scrabble. Posses ion given April 1st, 1890. Terms reasonable, 'or further information apply to FLEMING A SNYDER, Real Estate Agents, Shepherdstown, w. \ a. fJAUDEN SEEDS.? As the season is ad VJ vanced, I oner the remnant of my gar den seeds very cheap. All fresh and many of them can t>e used next year without any risk. soon, at McMURRAN'S DRUG STORE. HAS STRUCK US And We are F^eady to Meet It with an Immense Line of Dry Goods, Millinery, Ribbons, Carpets, Notions. Oil-Cloths, Mattings, Fine Shoes and Jewelry. "F you want Corsets from 20c up to . $i.2o, call ou M. S. HITESHEW. F you want Silk Kibbons cheaper . than you ever saw them, call on M. S. HITESHEW. F you want Challies from (>c to 20 cents, call on M. S. HITESHEW. F you want Dress Goods from 5c to SI. 00 per yard, call on M. S. HITESHEW. F you want White Goods of any . description from 8c to 25c, call on M. S. HITESHEW. F you want a nice Bonnet or Hat at prices that will surprise you, call on M. S. HITESHEW. I I I If you want any Jewelry, such as Breast Pins, Ear Kings or Cuff But tons, call on M. S. HITESHEW. If you want any Ladies', Misses' or Children's Shoes at Bottom Prices, call on M. S. HITESHEW. If you want Mattings at 12^,15, lfi, 18 or 20c, call on M. S. HITESHEW. If you want 30-ceut Rag Carpets or a nice English Hemp Carpet, call on M. S. HITESHEW. Call and see us. We discount ev ery dollar's worth of goods we buy and give our customers the benefit of it. W e can't be undersold. Our motto: Quick Sales, Small Profits. For Cheap Goods in our line, call on M. S. HITESHEW. M. B. BAKER -18 NOW RECEIVING DAILY Dry Goods, %J 7 Fancy Goods, Notions, Hats, Shoes, Straw Goods, Carpets, lings, Oilcloths, Groceries, Provisions, &c., cVc. Call anil wee what a complete stock of goods he has. Learn the low prices at which he sells. Observe for yourself the good qualities. M. R BAKER Mrs. M. L. Herrington, At J. F. Welshans* Old Stand, has now a Fine Stock of Summer Millinery, White Dress Goods, FANCY ARTICLES ?AND? NOTIONS, Which can he bought CH EAPERthan elsewhere. HATS received every week. CALL AND SEE FOR YOURSELF. Important Notice ! IINVITK your attention to a successful sub stitute for scraping white- washed walls. I : will put paper ou white- washed walls with f out scraping the walls If the lime is tight and will guarantee It to stay on as long as it will I if scraped. If It comes off. J will furnish pa per and will put It on at my expense. 1 can get reliable parties to vouch to this where I have put paper on. Also will hang paper as cheap ss any one. I can furnish paper as as cheap as you can get U anywhere, suitable 1 for decorating ceilings and walls of any kind. Wllldoauy kind of house and sign painting. Furniture done up in style. W'M. K. MI1.LKK. Notice to Trespassers. ALL persons are hereby warned from trespassing upon the lands of the under signed. The law will be strictly euforced against those caught (without permission) hunting, fishing or In anyway intruding upon the premises of V JOH. L. COOKl S. HAMILTON DAVIS, W.T. LKMEN. W. H. BILLMYER, DAVID BILLMYEK. Mar^h 2Stth, 1889 ? 6m. THE BEST PLACE ON EARTH ?To Buy Men's, Boys' and Children*?? CLOTHING And Gents' Furnishing Goods IS AT V Jacob Wintermoyer's, The Boss Clothing Man, Shepherdsttmn. HIS first word Is Barnnms. He is now ready with one of the Finest Lines of 8PRINU CLOTHING that has ever been brought to this market, and he defies Hagerstown or Martinsburg to compete with him In Prices, Quality and Style, as he contends that there never have been better goods shown and greater varieties ottered and prices never have been so low. There is no room for im provement in the Bargains he offers this sea son in .Men's, Boys' and Children's Clothing and Gent?' Furnishing Goods. His line of NECKWEAR 1b someitiiug nice and large ; so mnch so that every man can have plenty of styles to make a selection from. Remember, he carries a large line of SHIRTS, dress and overshlrts, also WORKING SHIRTS of all descriptions. HOSIERY' and UNDERWEAR. Remember, we can save you money on alio! these things. TRUNKS and VALISES. He has a larjje line ot them. COLLARS and CUFFS, all tiie lat est shapes and styles, and. In fact, everyt hing that man needs in ( lothing and Furnishing Goods, lie can find at the Boss Clothing House of Jacob Wlntermoyer. Now all I ask Of my friends and customers is to come and see these goods and their prices and Ikj convinced that you can do better In buying your goods at home than elsewhere. 1 wish to return my thanks to all of my friends and customers lor their past kindness aud hope a continuance of the same in the future. I shall try my best to please you. Remember Ihe old stand. Col lege square. JACOB WINTERMOYEP., The Boss (.'lothing Mail. Attention ! VVe have received our Spring Stock of Merchant Tailoring Supplies, also the BEST stock of Gentlemen's Furnish ing Goods in town, consisting of Gauze Underwear, Hosiery, Neckwear, Umbrellas, Grip sacks, etc. VVe would call at tention to the following: In tending to QUIT the Ready-Made Clothing bus iness, we are now offering our ENTIRE STOCK AT COST to close out. Special Induce ments in Overcoats, balance of stock in Spring Weights. CUSTOM CUTTING a specialty. Hoping to merit a lair share ot patronage, we are Yours Respectfully, S. P. HUMRICKHOUSE & SON. ESTABLISHED IN 1868. JEFFERSON Sash, Door and Blind FACTORY. CALL FOR YOUR Framing, Siding, Sheathing, Floor ing, Frames, Sash, Blinds, Doors, Mantels, Mouldings, Newels and Stair Work, Plastering Lath, Brick Tiles, Ac., Ac., ? A T John McKnight's, CHARLESTOWN, W. VA. Having put in new machinery and a force of skilled workmen, we are pre pared to furnish material with expedi- j tion and satisfaction to all at the most reasonable terms. Factory opposite H. & O. Depot. Successor to C. H. McKniglit & Co. HABEKSTOWN STEAM GRANITE AND MARBLE WORKS! Stouffer& Darner, M A N U KACTU KKKS OK Granite and Marble Monuments, Sarcopha- j gus, Headstones, Tombs, .statues, Vases, I'rns. <&c., of Every Description, lroui Qulncy, Marre, Concord, Westeily, Oak Hill, Clark's Island, Woodstock and all the Principal Eastern Granites; also Ked Scotch Granite. Particular Attention Given to Lettering in all its Forms. Original Designs Fur nished on Application. Also, Slate Mantels and Hullding Work of Every Description in Marble, Grauite and Sand Stone. Cemetery Coping, Ac. Works corner Jonathan and Antietam Sts., | opp. B. A 0. Depot, Hagerstown, Md, H. L. HOXJT, Agent at Shepherdstown, W. Va., Has a full line of Designs and will show them upon application. FARMS FOR SALE, j IOO acres of land In Clark County, Kansas, 0 miles from Ashland, the county seat, and railroad depot, and In sight of the Cimarron River. Good soil, tine gniss. Mr. Robert N. t-iiule, iormerly of this couuty, lives on the adjoining quarter section, and pastured 50 head of cattle on the two farms last year. Land, rolling prairie; wire fence all around farm. Price S1.2U0 ? one-half cash, balance in 1 and 2 years. FLEMING & SNYDER, Real Estate Agents. Shephenistown. W. Va. COAL! COAL T COAL! HAVE reduced priceson all grades of Coal aud I have been especiallly careful in purchaslugonly the very best quality, entire ly free from slate. Don't ;fall to examine my stock and prices before purchasing. G.T. HODGES. J. S, FLEMINGJIotary Public. WILL take acknowledgments of Iteeds Power of Attorney, Affidavits, Depo?l tlons, and attend to all business connected with the office. I VSfo The Ckirf Krnon for the great 8UC jess of Hood's Sarsaparilla Is found la th? article Itself. Ii Is merit that wins, and the tact that Ilood's Sarsaparilla actually ac? TOmpllslies what is claimed for It, is what has given to this medicine a popularity and ^ ?ale greater than that ot any other sarsapa Mprit WinQ rlIU or b,ood purl* rVICllL W 1119 fier before the public. Good's Sarsaparilla cures 8crofula, Salt Kheum and all Humors, Dyspepsia, Sick Headache, Biliousness, overcomes That Tired Feeling, creates an Ap|>etite, strength ins the Nerves, builds up the iVhole System. Hood 'a Narwipnrilln Is sold by all drug fists. 51 ; six for $5. Prepared l>y C. 1. Hood b Co., Apothecaries, Lowed. Mass. GO and SEE; FOR YOURSELF -THAT? B. S. M. HOFFMAN has opened rooms opposite the S. V. 1 Railroad Depot, where you can find rUIiNI T U K E ! of the Latest Patterns always on hand. such as I Parlor and Chamber Suits Complete! B EDST K A 1 >S, WA RDROB ES, WASH ST A N J )S, M A TT R ESS ES, BUREAUS. BUFFETS, Extension and Marble-Top Tables, Single and Bed Lounges, Chairs and Rockers. Also Agent for the DAVIS SEWING MACHINES. All articles sold at prices that will compete with the lowest sold any where. In the Undertaking ? yor WILL FIND? CASKETS, FLOWERS, COFFINS, SLIPPERS, ROBES, CREPE, Gloves, and all pertaining to the bus iness. Personal attention given in every case. U. S. M. HOFFMAN. WE WISH TO INFORM YOU ?THAT WE HAVE .11' ST RECEIVED? OUR NEW SPRING STOCK ?OF? Suitings and Coatings ? AM) ? PANTALOOiMNGS. Tills stock Is t lie largest ever shown In 11h- , gerstown, and prices range from the chea|>est | lu the liner grades, made up In llrst-class < style, anil with Fit and Workmanship Guaranteed. GENTS' FURNISHING GOODS! In Gents' Furnishing Goods we show a large ! line of New, stylish and Hairlsume Goo<ts. , Our line of Fancy Flannels In Plaids and .Stripes, Percales, Pique, Pleated aud Plain I Dress Sliirts, cannot be excelled. In Neckwear, we show all the latest novel- i ties In Tecks, I^utls, Four-in-hand aud Club- ; House Scaris, from 25c tg jl.2u. We have all the new shades in Gents' Kid Gloves ? for the early spring. These goods must lie seen to be appreciated. Call and examine and be convinced thai we have the largest stock ever shown In liagerstowu. Respect fully, JOHN D. SWAKTZ, Merchant Tailor and Gents' Outfitter, No. 21 W. Washington St , Hagerstown, >ld. A Business Notice. t CIIANUKof times causes a change In the ./X way of conducting business. Hence, some merchants are adopting the cash system. We have not yet, strictly speaking, but continue to sell ou short or reasonable time to good I and tried customers, and sell as low as tlu?e who claim to be selling strictly for cash. For a few quotations we submit to your consider ation: Yard- Wide Straw Mart ting from locts. up; Home-Made .New Rjig Carpet, pretty styles, W and 50c ; Table aud Floor Oil Cloths, 4-1, 5-4 and 6-1 wide, at prices from 30 to 50 ct*. Keautllui Dress Ginghams, b to 1?k- per yanl. valines (nice, new goods), luc ; calico, 5 lode; Lawns, I to 10c; India Linens, 10 to 25c ; La dles Corsets, 25c to ?1.; Handkerchiefs and Hosiery ranging from 5 to 25c ; Hat*, 5c to 1*2. Sugars, Syrups and Cotlee at as low prices as competitors are selling. Shoes, (jueensware, Tinware and Hardwaie to suit all. at ROCK BOTTOM PRICES. Tobacco to suit most all who use the weed In prices ranging from :5c per pound up to tiUc. In lact, my stock is full, and 1 am constantly In receipt of New Goods. | My aim is to do a lair and square business and to treat all alike. And don't you forget it. If you want a tlrst-class Flour, second to uoue, come right along with your wheat or cash andcall tor the Miliville Sunlight Flour, aud wbeu you take It home your wife or daughter will be pleased and furnish you with nice bread. My Motto Is QUICK SALES AM) SMALL PROFITS. We want to live and see our fellow men do likewise. Our aim w ill l*e to liy to accommodate ourselves to suit all who may call upon us, aud If any mistakes occur please give us an opportunity ' to correct them. We hope by fair and honest | dealing, in connection with t lie fact of selling goods as low as any other Arm, to merit a share of the trade. So cunie right along and take away oue dollar's worth oi goods for ev ery hundred cents you leave with us. Very Kespectiully, N. 8. J. STRIDER. BRUSHES.? Just received % supply of Pain*, i Brushes and Dusters, Whitewash Brushes, Scrubbing Brushes, KaJsomlne Brushes, Shoe Brushes, all very cheap, at McMURRAN'S DRUG STORE i BE STILL, AND WAIT. tie still, and wait. And bear thy fate? If thou art poor or desolate As patiently As It may be, Till better fortune comes to thee. Though black the night. No star In sight. There surely comes the morning light; 80 o'er the sky Of midnight dye The sun will shine out bye and bye. Be still, and wait. Nor frown at fate. Be thy misfortune small or great; For thou shouldst know That Joy and woe Have, like the tides, their ebb and flow. The fret and strain Of heart aud brain Increase the gloom, augineut the puln ; But hours of culm Like hallowed psalm? To aching wounds will furnish balm. Though many a bliss Thou'rt doomed to mlns In such a changing world as this, Ihy fears abate: Be still, and wait. For Joy will tlnd the? soon or late. Mr. Appleton's Boarders. Hiram Appleton was fond of money j and as he lived in the most economic- j al manner, liad managed to accumu late a considerable sum of it. As an j instance of his economy, he had worn the same blue coat with brass buttons for ten years, to church and to mus- j ter. and there was considerable prob bility of its having to serve much j longer. Hiram was a bachelor. He considered a wife an expensive luxury, from which he abstained from eco nomical motives. In the course of time, however, Hiram came to take a different view of the matter. He read somewhere that it was saving to be married, as the work that a wife would do would more than pay the expenses of her i board and clothing. On reflection Hiram considered that under his cir cumstances. this was a consideration of some importance. "Besides," thought lie, ' we might ' take boarders, and taking boarders is profitable if you don't keep 'em too well. I've heard that Aunt Jane I)oo little made a thousand dollars clear in one year from keeping boarders. And all the labor comes on the wim min folks, too. I guess I must be married." Mr. Appleton decided on the whole to marry a widow. We give his reasons in his own words: "It stands to reason," ne solilo" quized, that a widow must have more experience about household mat ters than one who hasn't been mar ried. Now. one that isn't experienced is very apt to waste things, and it takes a good deal of time to teach 'em better. Now a widow is already broken into the ways of household. Mr. Hiram Appleton, accordingly, began to look about him. Just at this time there came into the town a certain Widow Jones, on a visit to a relation. As Mr. Appleteu was well acquaint ed at the house where she wa?J visit ing, he soon found it in his way to "call round." The widow was sitting in the "keep ing room," with Mrs. Felton, her rela tion. "Mr. Appleton," said the latter, let me introduce you to my cousin, Mrs. Jones." Hiram bowed. "I wonder whether she's a widow. ' he thought to himself. When Mrs. Felton accompanied him to the door he ventured to make the inquiry. "Yes," said Mrs. Felton, "her hus band died two years since." "You see, Mrs. Felton. said Hiram in a business-like tone, "I ve been thinking of getting married. I think on the whole, it would be a good pol icy. I guess 1 should prefer a smart industrious, economical widow, if I could hear of one anywhere " "Then," said Mrs. Felton, "1 am quite sure that my cousin would suit you. She's as industrious a creetur as you ever saw. Always has work in her hand." "There's one thing I want to know about," said Hiram anxiously. "Is she fond of dress. 1 don t Know much about it, but I've heard that some wiiumin spend a sight on their dress. Now I can't stand that anyhow. I calculate that mv wife? if I ever have anv ? shall dress decent: but as to silk dresses, and gold chains, and such, they won't come out of me. Mrs. Fehon assured the inquirer that no one could be more simple in her tastes than her cousin? an assur ance which gratified Mr. Appleton exceedingly. "You needn't tell her what I've been saying," said Hiram. "I'll come in again two or three times, and see how I like her ways, and if I do I II propose pretty quick." "You'd better," said Mrs. Fulton, "for there's no knowing how soon somebody else may pick her up." Instead of regarding Hiram's in junction, Mrs. Fulton straightway communicated the fUbstance of the window. Now it so happened, for reasons which will appear, that the widow was by no means indisposed to a sec ond marriage, and on hearing that Hiram was a man of property she concluded to "set her cap for him. "You must appear to be very indus trious and economical. said Mrs. I* el ton. He laid particular stress on that." "I>on't fear for me," said her cousin "It takes a widow to manage the men." When Hiram made his second call, the Widow Jones was arrayed in a very plain calico, which, at the nt- j most, could not have cost more than ninepence per yard. "You must excuse the plainness of j my dress, Mr. Appleton," said she, ' "but I don't approve of rich d russets. A calico is just as warm as a silk, or at any rate there isn't much differ ence. and there's a great deal of dif ference in the price." Hiram was delighted. "You're a sensible woman Mrs. Jones." said he. "You've got a soul above the majority of your sex." "Thank you. Mr. Appleton." said the widow demurely. "I don't take no credit to myself for it. It's nat ural to me. It makes me sick to see how fond most women are of flum mery, and putting all they can earn on their back." "That'sa fact," said Hiram. "That's just the effect it has on me. Now. Mrs. Jones," this he said in a confi dential tone, how long do you think I have made this coat do for best." Mrs. Jones couldn't possibly tell. "It's lasted ten years," said Hiram, with belonging pride. Ten years, and i it's a good coat yet."' "So it is," said the widow, "and I commend your prudence. Mr. Apple ton. How long do "you think it is since I bought this dress?" Hiram ventured to guess "five years." "You're wrong," said the widow, shaking her head. "I had it just twelve years ago, come spring." Mrs. Jones did not think it neces sary to mention that although it had been cast aside some 10 years since, and had only been resuscitated for the sake of producing an impression on Mr. Appleton. "Twelve years!" exclaimed Hiram in a glow of admiration. "You're a perfect treasure. Mrs. Jones." "Iji, now, don't mean it," said the widow, bashfully. "Yes, I do. and you're the woman I've been seeking for years for a wife. So loving and so? economical! Dear widow Jones, may I hope that you i will favor me with your hand- that you will become Mrs. Appleton?" "This is so unexpected," murmured the widow "and yet I feel that a man of your just sentiments and pru dent habits is not to be slighted. 1 will accept your offer in the same spirit in which it is made." "There is one other thing," said Hiram, after a short pause, "that I should like to mention. I am a straightforward man. and I want ev erything to be understood. Would you have any objection to taking a few boarders after we are married?" "Not the slightest." said the widow, "indeed I intended to mention some thing of the sort to you." "Did you, though, really?" inquired Hiram with delight. "Yes, the fart is, Mr. Appleton, I am social l?y temperment, ami it is rather agreeable than otherwise to have a large family about me." Hiram began to think that the widow was an admirable wotuan, ami he could not make a better match if he had sought the world over. "In the course of time,*' said he to himself. "I shouldn't wonder if it proved thousands of dollars in my pocket. If 1 could only have met with such a woman 20 years ago. However, better late than never."1 Preparations were hastened for the wedding. Hiram feared that some thing would turn up to prevent the marriage, on which he had set his heart. As for the widow, she made no Kerious objections. And, accord ingly, one mornint; they rode over to the minister's and were united with out any display. Hiram wore the same blue coat with brass buttons which had served him so long and faithfully. ''It looks well enough," he haul, "and there isn't any use going to any foolish expense." The widow was dressed in a plain delaine, with no ornaments. "How much shall I give youj" asked Hiram ol the clergyman who had united them. "Whatever you please," said the clergyman politely. "How much ddes the law allow!" persisted Hiram. "One dollar and a quarter." "Then,' said Hiram, ' here's a 'two.' and you can give me back 75 rents in change. The clergyman made change with as sober a face as he could, and the happy pair departed for home. The next day Hiram broached the subject of boarders. "There ain't any use in delavinjf the matter a* I know of." said he. "We might as well begin first as last. Suppose we advertise." "There i*u't any need of that." said the new Mrs. Appleton. "I know of some friends in the place where I used j to live who would be too glad to come and board with us. "Do you?" asked Hiram, with eag erness. ""That's a (food idea. It will save the expense of advertising." "Yes," said Mrs. Appleton. "That is very true. However, it will be necessary to go and see them, and that will cost something." "How much?" "A dollar and thirty-seven cent each way." returned his wife. "That will make $2.75." said Hiram. "I'll give you three. The extra quar ter will do for miscellaneous expen ses." This was an unexampled stroke of generosity on the part of Mr. Apple ton; but the thought of the profits which he was going to make made him feel unusually generous. "How long will you be gone?" asked Hiram. ?"That will depend a little on cir- ; cumstances. I think I can be back by the end of the week." "And you feel pretty sure of bring ing back some boarders?" "I think I can promise you six at least." said his wife confidently. "SixP returned Hiram with satis, faction. "Six, at three dollars a week, will make eighteen dollars. Then the ae tual cost of Itoarding theiu nwd Dot b? more than a dollar apiece. That will make twelve dollar? clear weekly, or twelve hundred dollars a year.*' This was a very gratifying calcula tion. and Hiram awaited his wife's re turn with eagerness. On Saturday night the stage stop ped at the door. It ap|>eared to l?e unusually full. Mrs. Appleton got out first. Then i successfully alighted three boys and j three girls, varying in a g? from 15 to 5. "So they're all childreu," said Hi- ? ram a little bewilded. "Yes." said his wife. "Please help the driver In with their trunks." "They wou't eat so much as if they were grown." thought Hiram, as he proceeded to do what was assigned him. At length, they were all iu the house ? baggage and all, and the driver had departed. "What are their names?" ai>ked Hi- ' ram. looking h'kuii hiui. "Th<^ last name is Jones. They are mv children by my first husband.'' "What!" ezclaiuifd Hiram aghast. "Ain't they boarders?," "Of course. This will be their home henceforth. Where should they board but with their new father?" Poor Hiram! He raved and stormed but to no effect. The widow and her children had gained a foothold, aud 'hey kept it. Whenever anybody speaks to hiiu now about the profits of keeping boarders he shakes his head and looks melancholy. Three Good F ablet THK nONKKY AM) TliK TRAVKLKR. A belated traveler on the king's highway was made terribly auxiou* at a certain spot by fearful sounds. He went forward very timidly, ready to fiy for his life at any moment, but all of a sudden discovered that the dri-aded sounds 1ms been uttered by a donkey. "See here, you miserable beast, what ure you trying to g?-t at. any how?" demanded the traveler. "Why, it is a ?-ase of self sacrifice," replied thedoukey. Instead of stand ing in my stall I come out and brave the inclement weather to cheer the belated traveler with my voice ami let him know that friends are near." i "You old dunder head, but it is your voice which adds terror to the mud and darkness! < to hence ami let up!" Moral: The blunders of friends are more to be dreaded than the maehina tious of enemies. HBRCULB8 AND TIIK WOODSMAN. It is related that Hercules was pass ing through a for?st one day when lie came upon a woodsman who was idle and inquired: "Have you amassed wealth until you no longer have to work?" "Nay, my friend," was the answer; "but this log needs moving. and 1 have not the strength to accompli*!) the tank.'" "O, as to that, I'll lend you a hand." ! cheerfully replied Hercules, and he seized the log ami moved it into the position desired. Returning over the same course a week later, he found the same wood man again idle, and to his inquiries the man replied: "1 was waiting for you to return > and move another log for me." Moral: He who helps the man who can help himself does him an injury. THK ANT AM) THK BKKTLK. One day while the ant was rolling a grain of corn over the ground a bee tle happened along and inquired: My industrious friend, why all this labor?" "1 am working to get this grain of corn into my store-house for the win ter. I must have a store laid by or I shall stare."' "Hut how foolish to work so hard for it! You don't see me sweating un der the collar, and yet 1 get along as well as most insects.' "Yes, you are all right now because j it is summer, but wait until winter comes on. If you are idle now you will perish then." "Thanks, my dear aun* but dou't worry over the uudemigned. Call on me about the middle of January.' Time passed on. The ant worked industriously to lay by a store, and an the winter eoiue on aud she was congratulating herself ou her fore sight and prudence, the beetle came that way. He was fat aud sleek aud in line spirits, and he halted to say: "Morning, old economy. How goes it r "I have two kinds of eatables laid by for winter," replied the ant, "while you?'' "While I aui located in the gover nor's kitchen for the next six mouths, and count on no less than seven kinds of food per day." "But how is that." Simply that I work with my month, while you work with your muscles. I talk politics, while you talk corn Moral: Let's all talk polities. A miller fell fast asleep in his mill, and bent forward until his chair was caught in some machinery, and al most a handful 1 of hair was pulled out. Of course he was awaken. His first bewildered exclaiination was: "Hang it! wife, what's the matter nowf Mother (suspicioosly>? If you haven't been in swimming' how did your hair get so wet? Little Die k? That's perspiration? runnin' away from bad boys wot wanted me to disobey you an' go in swimmin ! 8 be? Oh, see that scarecrow out there in the field. He? That isnt a scarecrow. She ? It must be; see bow motionless it is. He-Tbat's the hired man at work. Or. Brown-SequsN'i Elixir. The use of vitalizing fluids in the bodies of animal* as a means of pro* longing and invigorating human life has been recently advocated by Dr. Brown-Sequard after a series of suc cessful experiments upon himself. The details were first recited in a paper read in Paris before the Societe de Biologic, and were received by the learned audieuce with a thrill of as tonishment and an air of scientific in credulity. As l>r. Brown-Sequard was in his seventy-third year he was a promising subject for hyj?odermlc injections of his new elixir of life, and the eiuphasi* with which he describes the freshness of youth pulsating through his veins and the recovery of impaired vital functions producted a profound impression upon the physiologists and surgeons there as sembled. Subsequently one of his as sistants. Dr. Variot, selected three debilitated men. ranging in age from fifty-four to sixty-eight aud turned the* syringe upon them with the result of immediately improving their diges tion. increasing their muscular action ami also of causing general nervous excitement. Sufficient time has not ?lapsed to enable Dr. Brown-Sequard to judge of the permanent effect* of the treatment of these three (Mitients. but he has prc|>ared for "The l<aucet' n synopsis of his |?a|>ers on the snl> ject, and of his own experience, with the reservation tliat Dr, Varlot's e i periinents, so far as tlie results have been observed, strengthen his own conclusions respecting the potency of the elixir Dr. Brown-Sequard's preliminary experiments were tried on animals iu order to prove the innocuity of the elixir, which was derived from the blood .and certain glands of guiuea pigs aud dogs. Before using the syringe upon himself lie tested the decoction by administering it to two superannuated rabbits and one old dog. After this dog had received twenty subcutaneous injections with out harm he considered it safe to op erate upon himself. From May Irt to June 4 he made ten injections In his arms and legs, using a dark reddish fluid obtained from the glands of a very young healthy adult dog and several guinea pigs. The results were most surprising. Before the experl meuts upon himself he was so weak that lie was invariably compelled to sit after working half an hour ill Ills iabratory; ami for many year* lie had been so exhausted after returning home at 8 o'clock as to be forced at once to) go to l>ed, where lie would l?e too tired to sleep. After the eiperi uieuts he was able to stand for three or four hours in his Iabratory and to write in the evening for an hour and a half without feeling a sense of weari ness. Instead of creeping and hob bling on a stalroase. as had been his habit iu recent years, he could run up aud down like a boy. His arm" tested iu a dynauoiueter, regained a strength which they had not possess ed for twenty six years. Digestion aud other functions were markedly improved. With regard to the facility of intellectual labor, which had greatly diminished with advancing age, he records a decided return to normal conditions in the prime of life. In brief, all functions depend ing on the spinal cortlaud nervous centres were notably aud rapidly strengthened by the action of the "vitalized principles" of the healthy dog and the agile youngguinea pigs. Having demonstrated in hie own pernon the eflicacy of hi* rejuvenat ing medicine, Dr. Brown-Me<|uaid, like the scientific iuve*tigator he i*. Mopped taking it in order to ascertain how Ion# the beneficial re*uits would |a?t. For four week* there was no marked decline of vitality, hut from July 3 there wu ? complete return of the pre-existing infirmities and weak' lies* of old age. As lie wu no wurw than he had been before receiving the drHt injection, he philosophically accepted the temporary low of rein forced ntrerigth an a counter proof of the vitalizing Influence exerted by hi* elixir for a month. With the bor rowed resource* of another robust d<?jf and a few more guinea pigs be calmly contemplate# in writing to "The l^ancet" the prospect of another mouth's lease of youth and manly vigor. He doe* not, however, claim the merit of discovering the secret of perpetual youth, but rather of easing the burdens of old age. He modestly give* the result* to the scientific work as a basis for further ei|?eriment. expressing a belief that while upecial nutritive actions bring ing on certaiu change* In men and animals are absolutely fatal and Ir reversible, It is possible by means of the vitalized elements used by him and the three superannuated Parisi an* to re-endow tissue*, muscle* and nerve-eentres with power once poe tised but impaired by the weight of year*. Popular faith In Dr. Brown Mefjuard's antidote for old afe will de pend in larger measure upon his own tuccess in keeping hiiueelf alive and vigorous by means of hia mcnthly doses of dog and guinea pig. Thai be will live long and thrive on Ills dark-red decoction will be the desire of all men. whether in their prime or in their dotage. Htreet Car Driver? "Me and that off harae has been workJn' for the company for twelve years now." Passenger? "That so! The com pany most think a great deal of yon both.'1 ! "Wail, I dunno; last wake the two of us was taken sick, and they got a doctor for the harae, and doeked me. (rklap thare now, Betsy." ( The smart yoong man nid be had not been in the drag store very long, ? bat be bad been at tbe soda fountain : long enough to be a litiifin { ;