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The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, September 01, 1900, Image 4

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THE- INTELLIGENCER^
.i ' . -" .. i
Published Dally* Except Sunday* by
Intelligencer Publishing Co.,
25 and 27 Fourteenth Street.
JOHN FREW. Pre*, end Uus. Moiiotfer.
Torms: ,Por Year* by Mall* In Aclvau.co,;
Postage Prepaid.
Dally (6 Days Tor Week) 1 Year... ?5.20
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Weekly, Six Months......*..*. ..CO
ffHE DAILY INTELLIOENCEP. Is delivered!
by carriers In Wheeling and adjacent
towns at 10 cents per week.
Persons 'wishing to aubscrlbo to THE
DAILY INTELLIGENCE!* can do so
oy sending in uicir oracra 10 ma intelligencer
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Tributes of Rpspe^i and Obituary Notices
iGO cents per Inch.
Correspondence contalnlnfr Important
nowa solclted from cvdry* part of tho
surrounding country.
Rejected communications will not bo.returned
unless accompanied by .sufficient
poatago. ,
(The INTELLIGENCER, embracing Its
several editions, Is entered in tho Postoffice
at Wheeling, W. Viw, as secondclass
matter.).
TELEPHONE NUMBERS:
Editorial Rooms 823 | Ccuntin; Room. 822
THE INTELLIGENCER.
"WHEELING. SEPTEMBER 1, 1000.
\
REPUBLICAN NATIONAL TICKET.
For President.
william Mckinley.
Of Ohio.
For Vice President,
THEODORE ROOSEVELT,
Of New York. - ...
PRESIDENTIAL ELECTORS.
At Large.
* . BENSON B. McMECHEN,
. 01 Marshall County.
J. B. LEWIS.
? Of Kanawha County.
DISTRICT ELECTORS
First District,
O. W. O. HARDMAN. of Tyler Co.
Second District,
N. G. KEIM, of Randolph Co.
Third District,
J. L. BEURY, of Fayette Co.
Fourth District.
J. B. McCLURE. of Wayne Co.
v '
FOR CONGRESS.
First District,
B. B. DOVENER, of Ohio Co.
Second District
ALSTON G. DAYTON, of Barbour Co.
Third District,
. JOSEPH H. GAINES, of Kanawha Co.
Fourth District,
JAMES A. HUGHES, of Cabell Co.
REPUBLICAN STATE TICKET.
For Governor.
ALBERT B. WHITE, of Wood Co.
For Auditor,
ARNOLD C. SCIIERR, of Mineral Co.
For Treasurer.
PETER SILMAN, of Kanawha Co.
* For Sunt, of Schoo's.
. T. C. MILLER, of Mari- *,?.
For Attorney Gencr
ROMEO H. FREER, of Hi Co.
Judges Supremo Cou..
HENRY BRANNON. or Lov/ia Co.
GEO. POFFENBARGER, of Mason Co.
REPUBLICAN COUNTY TICKET.
SherifT-D. H. Taylor.
?>rosecutIns: Attorney?Frank W. Nesbltt.
Assessor (City Dlst.)?Addison Israe!.
Assessor (Country Dlst.)?Lester Smith.
A Voice From the South.
Here comes a sighing but triumphant
voice of patriotism from away down in
Georgia that makes the blood tingle. It
should thrill every true American heart,
and cause the poor small souls that
huddle around Boston tea tables to bow
their heads In shame. The letter given
below was dated at Atlanta, Georgia,
'August 28, and was written by Thomas
C." Crenshaw, addressed to Adjutant
General Corbln. It tells a sad but patriotic
story, as follows:
"My beloved son. Captain Frank P.
Crenshaw, reached Atlanta on the 23rd
Inst, and having been operated on on
the 26th, died this morning from the
effects of wounds received In battle In
Batangas province, Philippine Islands,
on June 5 last. He leaves a young
wife and four little.children.
"We pray for the sake of all who have
fallen there in defense of our country's
honor that the flag under which they
sacrificed their lives may never be pulled
down. We shall forever cherish the
testimonials of his gallantry of record
In your offlce."
How pitifully mean and dastardly' the
Invective and slander of the pusillanimous
anti-imperialists sound In comparison
with the solemn eloquence of
the above utterances. There is Roman
father and patriot for you that puts to
shame all the miserable sophistry and
paramountcy of Bryan* and his Infamous
abettors, Atkinson, Schurz, Wins
jovv,; nraaroru una otners. Who is to
blame for this young man's death but
the men who have been encouraging
Agulnaldo to hold out against the law*
ful authority of the United States government?
It Is pitiful that these men
should go about the country ranting
about the operations In the Philippines
when such cases as the above arc their
mute accusers of their Infamy.
There was another voice from til"
tomb, equally as eloquent In lt? accusation,
that of the gallant General Lawton
,who met death from a Filipino bullet
last November.' Writing only a few
days before he fell to ex-Consul John
Barrett ho said:
I would to God that tho truth of .this
wrtioU Philippine situation could be known
lb every one in America an I know Jt.
If the real hlatory, Inspiration and conditions
of thin Insurrection, and the influmenu,
local and external, that now encouru?e
tho enemy, as well as tho actual ponnUillltl?n
of th?g* inlands and peoples and
their reIa<Un* to thi? great Koiit. could
b* understood at homo, ,wo would hoar
no.moro talk'of unjust 'Shooting of government"
Into the Filipinos,-or of hauling
down our Hog In the'Philippine^.
If tlio "so-called untl-lmiicrlnllstK would',
honestly nscerinJn'the iruth on the ground
and not In dlfctunt America, they, whom
I bellove to bo honest incn and misinformed,
would he convinced of the error
of their.? statements and conclusions and
of the unfortunato effcct of their publications
hero.
IF I AM SHOT BY A FILIPINO BULliKT,
IT MIGHT A8 WELL COME FROM
ONE OP MY OWN MEN. BECAUSE I
KNOW-.FROM OBSERVATIONS CONFIRMED
BY CAPTURED PRISONEI13
THAT THE CONTINUANCE OF FIGHTTING
18 CHIEFLY DUE TO REPORTS
THAT ARE SENT OUT FROM AMERICA.
And
yet men go grinning about the
land spouting and writing a .lot of maudlin
njt, walling over, tlio fate of'.a
miserable and presumptuous rebel,'
wanting the flag furled In dishonor'and
demanding that our soldiers beat a
cowardly retreat overground dyed \vlth
the blood of such men as Captain.Crenshaw,
Ge'rieral Law ton and hundreds of
others, i "VV111 It be done, can It be done?
No, a thousand times no.
Perverting the Facts.
In the Democratic, papers' that'.cony?
to this office there Is enclosed'a>suppl^
ment called an address-to the voters of
West .Virginia, and which la .fathered
by the Democratic state executive committee.
This-remarkable- document attempts
to show why the West Virginia
Democracy should be returned to
power," but it makes a. most miserable
list of It. That party has {shown1;itself .
to be wholly Incompetent to run thd
affairs, of this growing commonwealth,'
arid not-hlng would be more.disastrous
to West Virginia than the triumph ot
the party of John T. McGraw at the
polls in November. It' would give- the
state a set-back that would take'years
to recover from?both commercially
and Industrially.. What would become
of us with the Chlllons, McCorkle and
IU.V.VHUVV iu mesuaaie.'
The most impudent claim in the document
Is the effort-to make it appear
that the gross frauds in Taylor/county
were r.ot frauds at all," that the- Knight
of the Purple Pencil is wholly innocent
of any political crime, and that Brohard,
the Republican candidate for the
legislature, was actually defeated. Oh,
was he? "Well, how about the report of
the Taylor county grand Jury, the home
county of Colonel McGriSv, composed
of b'cth Democrats and2Republlcans,
and who'arrived at the flowing conclusion
unanimously: .
"AT A CIRCUIT COURT,HELD FOR
THE COUNTY OF TAYLOR AT THE
COURT HOUSE THEREOF ON THE
FIFTEENTH DAY OF .APRIL, 1899,
WE, THE UNDERSIO^ED GRAND
JURORS FOR THE TERM OF 1S99 OF
THE CIRCUIT COURT tOF TAYLOR
COUNTY, HAVE FULLY AND CAREFULLY
EXAMINED INTO THE ALLEGED
ELECTION FRAUDS AT
THE ELECTION HELD IN NOVEMBER.
1S9S, AND HEREWITH SUBMIT
ALL THE TESTIMONY TAKEN
THEREIN TO THE JUDGE OF OUR
CIRCUIT COURT.
"THE TESTIMONY TAKEN BEFORE
THE COMMITTEE OF THE
HOUSE OF DELEGATES WAS READ
IN FULL BY THE SECRETARY OF
THE GRAND JURY-. IT WAS FOUND
TO BE THE UNANIMOUS OPINION
OF THIS GRAND JURY THAT
THERE HAD BEEN A FELONY
COMMITTED UPON THE BALLOTS
OF PRECINCTS NUMBER 1 AND
NUMBER 5 DISTRICT AND NUM
BER 2 AND NUMBER 3 OF COURT
HOUSE DISTRICT."
"A Broomstick Ghost."
Senator Cushman Davis, in a recent
speech at Chicago characterized the
frenzied cry of "Imperialism" by the
Demo-Popullsts as a "broomstick
ghest," and that 13 about, the nlze of itIf
there is any "imperialism" In the
question of retaining the Philippine Islands
it was in extending American
sovereignty Into those Islands by the
ratification of the treaty of cession. Mr.
Bryan favored this ratification and secured
by his arguments the votes of
seventeen Democratic, ^Populist and
free silver senators. j,,-.
In the whole history of this negative
party, which has ever ."Been Quivering
with conjectural ills/Jit has always
turned its face towards the walling
place. The whole contention of the
paramountcy of 'Imperialism" is so
wretchedly absurd that:;lt can hardly
be dignified by serious dfgument. It Is
simply a bogy created jfp frighten the
ignorant, and the over-credulous. Why
should this country go to war to release
people from the Imperial domination of
Spain, where they were ruled In a despotic
manner, and then turn around
and be so entirely dishonest, go back on
all the protestations and promises we
have made, and all at once transform
this government into an anarchy?
Then there is the howl of governing
people without their consent?away
from home, In fact, 10,000 miles away,
while the same party has disfranchised
10,000,000 of freemen at home. . Senator
Dolllver, the other (lay, threw some
light on this hypocrisy when he aald:
The world Is so arranged that every
masquerade of false pretense, trying to
do business upon a high moral ncale,
sooner or later comes to a point along
Its line of march where it can distinctly
hear the laughter of gods and men. Such
a point I think was reached at Kansas
City when "Pitchfork" Tilman was selected
on account of his voice to read
the declaration of Independence, with its
sublime precepts about the equality of
men and the ultimate basin of human government.
February 2G I heard Mr. Tillman
boast In the senate that his people
had openly nullified the law of the land,
treating the great amendments of the constitution
as null and void, and with bloodshed
and fraud, for which he offered no
apology, had driven more than one-half
of the population of South Carolina rrom
any participation whatever either In the'
government of the United States or in the
government of the community In which
they were born. Until Mr. lJryan shall
stand up somewhere before the American
people and in an audibly tone of voice
utter one word of manly disapproval of
the crime against civil liberty, which. In
the undisputed Democratic communities
of the United States, has,left ten millions
of people helpless and outcast before the
law, 1, for one, Intend to treat his ;iolsy
declarations on the subject of equal rights J
ns unlit for the rcspect of the American
people.
Bryan Coming,
If any evidence was wanting that the
Democrat# of West Virginia are In a
hopeless state, It is npyv furnished Jn the
announced coming of the great Apostle
of Calamity, that eminent discourager
of prosperity, the Hon. "William Jennings
Iirynn, erstwhile champion of 10
to 1, but now paramountlng antl-lmperlallsm.
We shall hall his corning and
Bpicd his parting as any other giicmt
that does uii-tho honor to visit our
thriving young state. We shall, in
fact, be more than glad to see him, and
we trust ?? many Republicans as can
will hear him, for out of Mr. Uryait'a
yr
'
||ilp??g7^ B&s
BoBH ' BRn
a WK&k vl^n
' SBa U^IhVI
f ; ' \ V > : ,\ \'~" .
r;;... I \ \ Vv^
181^
i: / II
/ a
own mouth lies his greatest condemns- o
tion. V
This star attraction was-' obtained ?
through the earnest solicitation of Col. t
John T. McGraw, who has Impressed o
upon the Democratic campaign mana- 11
gers In Chicago the belief that West
Virginia can be carried for Bryan'If
some active work Is done now. This r
shows that Colonel John is not quite so g
sure as he was, and from what we ?
know of the political situation In this t
state other and stronger doubts will yet
pervade his mind. However, as we f
said before, we shall be glad to have 11
:^Mr. Bryan with us, and we shall be ?
happy to point out the immense and 6
pleasing changes that have taken place n
since his visit four years ago In 'spite 0
of his prophesies of gloom and disaster, ^
or do anything else within reason to j
make his stay among us as agreeable as c
possible. ;
In this connection the following Imag- a
inary consultation between ex-Senator v
Gorman and ex-Governor Stone, of
Missouri, taken from the New York
Sun, is not at all Inappropriate:
"And what In u few words would be
your plan of campaign. Mr. Gorman?" y
asked Gum Shoe 13111 of the Maryland v
Mole. Mr. Gorman stroked his mcc",
which is not half so smooth as he. and v
answered: "I have thought it all out and
you may show it to Mr, Bryan. If you
choose. In the south, except in Maryland
and West Virginia?" .
"Yes. the south Is all right, thanks to
a judicious application of the consent- B(
of-the-governed theory," grinned -Mr.
Stone, who Is likewise ovon smoother In- "
side than out. E
"In Maryland nnd West "Virginia x.ot a p
word about silver. Just empire and the
trusts. Same for New York. New Jersey, ; n
Connecticut, Indiana, Illinois, Michigan, tl
Wisconsin. On the Pacific const not a r
word about imperialism. In other states,
west of the Mississippi.-the money ques- d
tion as much as you like." a
"Paramount cy. Is relative, hey?" -j
"l should rather describe it as gcograph- "
leal," continued Mr. Gorman. "The Doers ri
and the British alliance may he used r.ny- p
where, hut sparingly on the whole, I
should say. No overdoing It." "
"I wish there were some way of making g
the wild western silver man shut up dur- n
lug the" campaign." remarked the gentle- _
man of whom Hon. Bill Phelps says that *
"Bill Stone sucks the eggs, but hldos the
'shells."
"If you go to that. I wish our honest
but impulsive young lender would have H
viuuuiG uuLii ciwuur. nay. S
"Do you think that he will be elected, ,,
Mr. Gorman?" u
"Well, I am not In the habit oC.commit- a
ting myself to far as that, but I r.m will- n
lng to say that I believe somebody will be
elected. Good-bye." a
' ?e
The unanimous endorsement of Hon. c
C. L. Magec by the D-jmocrats of the s
forty-third senatorial district of Pehr.- ^
sylvanla, has caused a row In the Den- p
ocratlc camp, being denounced by the
Allegheny county Democratic convention
as "unmitigated perfidy." It la u a
very funny situation as it stands. r:
mm h
The Women's Christian Temperance n
Union, of Indianapolis, have started an E
.endless chain prayer campaign against a
the election of McKlnley, holding him ^
to be guilty of a thing for which he Is
not responsible. What was It Christ
said about charity? ^
1MZm> \\
The besieged legatloners made a ^
rather fantastic defense In converting ^
candlesticks Into ammunition, making t(
a gun out of a fire extinguisher, and Cl
fighting behind 10,000 sand b3gs made
of silk brocade material valued at 55 a
bau. a
t<
The wonder of the pugilistic world 1? c;
the renaissance of the Hon. James Cor- n
bett and the Hon. Robert Fltzslmmons,
who until recently were counted as 11
"has beens." ^
The medal to be struck commemorating
the siege of Pelcln will bear the fj
legend: "Men, not walls make a city," s
which Is quite a happy conceit. ti
k
Col. W. H. Gentry, a Democrat, and a c
member of Governor Beckham's staff,
says Kentucky will cast Its electoral
vote for McKlnley. t<
The United States and Russia are
backing LI Hung Chang. The other ^
powers seem to be hanging back.
In bidding good morning to September
we hope for some relief from the 0
heat of August.
Bryan's Invasion of West Virginia j"
need cause no alarm. lie was here In Q
Bryan has const'ntod- to answer Me- d
Craw's Macedonian cry for help. "V
Crolcoi' on the stump. Whew* Is
GOOD WORDS. ' if
a
Never Brighter or Better. \f
The Wheeling Intelligencer has begun p
it? fiftieth volume. It was never bright- n
c-r or bettor than It 1h now.,, The Intelllgencer
Ip one of the lending neWipn- -9!
l>er? of the < ountry, and deserves its po- *
Hltlon of prosperity and Influence. ? Porkeroburg
Journal. . '
Honor to tho State. *'l r(
The WlH'ellng^ntelllgencer han'.ppda- n(
ed Its forty-ninth birthday, which
makes It thirteen years older than the tl
Htatc. It has grown up with the stn(e, tl
and 1? recognized tin a state paper .of ai
unuauul ability. It l? calm, dignified, L
truthful and conservative and has-tollcd oi
year In and year out for the Re^ubll- tl
can party, presenting tne truth 1$ a Mr tl
minded manner. As* a uownpaperlt U
has never boon senmitlonal, but dlgnl- T
fled. It la an honor to the -state and ir
to tlie party, and it is tho darnoHt wish c<
a.-1-iJLJ.L/a v-? ju
V A
Strongest, pure
hd healthful of
nOVAL OAKINQ POWO
f all who know what a good neu
ier Is and the grand work It car
ompllsh along life's pathway, thii
ears may be long In the land c
lrth, and Its usefulness be not at
ne Jot or title, as times go on.?H
tigton Herald.
Thousands of Readers.
Entering upon Its fiftieth year, o
nerldan of life, the Wheeling In
'encer reflects with merited prld
fork and advancement of a half
ury's usefulness. Recently It \i
tie first number of Volume 50. Fi
lne years ago the Intelligencer
rom the hand press of our fathers,
ts Readers wtfre numbered, perhap
nly hundreds; to-day It Is pr
rom the wonderfully Improved mai
ry of the present era; Its column;
lied with the happenings of the \
nd Its thousands of readers are h<
.t daybreak with what transpired
tig the latest resolution of the c
'olltlcally, the-Intelligencer Is Rep
an clear through, and neved fal
iallast its end of the see-saw
nough argument to place nn unfoi
te antagonist "up In the air."?Bai
llle, Ohio, Saturday, Whetstone.
Age Has Not Withered.
Lg.8t Friday the Wheeling In
encer entered upon ' the forty-r
ear of Its publication. "Age has
rithered nor custom staled Its lnl
arlety."?Virginia Free Press.
STATE PRESS GLEANINGS
T. Moore Jackson is rather a h
ame man, but his political physio
ly will be badly awry when Cai
lovener gets done with him.
'list district has a normal Republ
mjorlty of between three and
tiousand. Even two years ago. \
>ovener had an oft year and lot
lscontented candidates for postol
nd things on his hands, he carrlei!
Istrlct by nearly two thousand
Ion.-Jackson V. Blair, an able
opular man. The State Journ:
ot saying Its friend Jackson Is n(
reat and good as Blalr, but he
tore of a mountainous road to din
'arkersburg Journal.
Bryan's mania for speaking Is g
ig rapidly. It has now reached
tnge of an incurable disease. Ir
He moments, when he cannot ge
udler.ee, Bryan talks to a gra
hone. It Is his hope that the gr
phone records will be purchase
very local Democratic committee
aurse he is not a stockholder in
rqphaphone machines, and reci
othlrig for their sale. He's m<
liking for the good of the count
arkersburg News.
The' colored people al over this i
re wrought up at the treatment t
ice are receiving In the south at
ands of the Democratic party,
ot one of them will vote for a si
lemocratic candidate this year. 1
re too nonesi nnu 100 smart to dp
cived by Democrats longer.?Phi
Republican.
Multitudes of peoplo who have
retting and fuming about the t(
eather of the past two months
e reminded that there will come
nd the shirt-waist man will be
j "pull down his vest" and don
Qat.?Virginia Free Press.
A Democrat correspondent propoi
column and a half of long rang)
?rrogat!ons to Captain Dovener.
aptaln wil be here to make an:
ext month, and the long-winiled
>rrogatlon point will have an op
jnlty to speak out in open mce
nd question Dovener face to fa
Weston Independent.
Any one had a perfect right to
ir the Republican nomination for
late senate. The Republicans arc
"ottlntc weak or slow horses now.
ecp "yer" eye on "yer Uncle" ]
alhoun Chronicle.
Republicans of Lincoln are gel
jgether in fine shape, and read
ck everything In sight or behind
:eneo, from a Democrat to a spc
yena.?Lincoln Citizen.
A Pen Picture of Bryan.
The Kentucky newspapers that
pposlng Bryanlsm and Goebe
iem disposed to nnnoy the edltoi
1e-Louisville Courier Journal, wl
upportlng both this year, by repro
lg statements he made when he
pposing both. One of the exti
hlch Is finding wide circulation Jf
jllowlng pen picture of Mr. B
rawn by the skillful hand of II
Patterson four yeurs ago:
"Mr. William J. Bryan has come
[entucky, and Kentucklans have t:
Is measure. He is a boy orator,
i a dishonest dodger. He Is a dn
dventurer. He Is a political fakir
i not of the material of which the
lo of the United States hnve
iade a President. Nor is he ove
10 material of which nny party
;*er before made a candidate."?
ork Tribune.
Lovorson and His Accomnlicci
Hocheater Democrat: Traltoroufl
?*pondonce with un enemy In urn
r>t the only evidence of trentum.
Ivlngof aid and comfort covern a i
tudo of act*, ?uoh n? the rcnolutlot
10 Indlanapolln "liberty" convnr
nd the Hpeecheii of Mr. Houtwoll.
evernon, being Icbh decreet than ?
them, wrote to the Flllplnoa, advl
10m to treat Am<?rlcann uh pi rat oh.
rnt In what lloutwcll and Jlryan
mchln/c In effect. Ao the New :
linen nayn, Lovornon being dlHcov
i an extremo trenaonable action, o
Mialty he must bo repudiated, whll
nwjjj.t. WJ mvi/jj 1, 1 iiii
MFm
iOLUELY P
$ i '
st, most economical
all leavening agents.
There are many imitation baking powder
are mage from alum, a corrosive acid t
ER CO., 100 WILLIAM ST.. NEW YORK.
rspa- acts are not repudiated for fear of crei
ac- atlngr the impression that the "antl-imit
Its perlalists" are not true to the Filipinos
if its and to Hag hauling. If Mr. Levorson
>ated Is a member of the Anti-Imperialist
[unt- League, aa he ave^, It could do no
harm for a federal grand Jury to make
some Inquiries about the activities of
that organization and of Mr. Leverson
_ the himself. Even cranks ou^ht aome,
... times to be tried for dangerous crankte,?
ism.
e Its ? ?
cen- POINTED PAKAGKAPHS.
isued :
?was Whisky is an accurate senses taker,
and Gloves are unsalable when they are
3( by kept on hand.
Inted A man la made either great or small
shin- by his own will.
* Close .quarter* are to be found In a
trved 8tIngy mnn s dollar.
dur- -A- policeman's club contains enough
arth. lumber to lloor a man.
ubll- Children and fools are very apt to
Is to seize upon unanswerable arguments,
with The average politician will promise
;tun- anything one minute and forget it the
rnes- next.
When a man's temperature reaches
the limit he is either hot-headed or has
cold feet.
It Is useless to argue with some peoilnth
pje> ijUt lawbreakers are always open
i not to conviction.
inlte n must be a consolation to the poor
brldu to know that she at least wasn't
mi*! i icu iui nci iiiuuey.
I. If wives didn't insist on their husbands
working the lawn mower overand
time there might be fewer grass wldgno
ows.
)tain ^ CM should learn to bake bread beThp
forR sll? learns to paint. It is better to
. tickle the. palate .than to tickle the pal,
n ette.?Chicago Dally News.
four m 0 j
vhen HEI'LECTIONS OF A BACHELOR.
s of
ftlces Flirtation is fascination with a string
I the to it.
over It is very seldom that you see a twoand
legged camel that can run as gracefully
is as a woman.
)t as When a man goes to church with his
has wifo '??rc lhan once a month, It Is said
_ that he "fairly worships her."
Success with a woman generally
means knowing what to say and then
knowing enough not to say It.
r0^" If a man will pat his wife's hand once
in a while when they are out In eompai
his ny and make believe he thought no one
t an was watching, she will take In washing
pha- to keep him In good cigars ao long as he
aph* lives.?New York Press.
J jjy ? o o :?
i. Of "A Devout Bluebeard."
the "A Devout Bluebeard," by Marie GraJly?s
ham. is one of the best books Issued so
Jrc_^ far this year, published by the "Ably"
bey Press," 114 Fifth Avenue, New
York, and to be obtained Hirough any
?tate hooksellerr-a satire on the foibles of the
their day. unique in treatment and a cleverly
the chosen plot, sprinkled with plenty of
and humor; natural because from actual
ngle observation.
The Man Shirt Waist at Squawville.
linn! Wc have never raised' objection to a Uecent
sort of dress,
Wht?n the fashion wasn't carrlcd to the
.bonlerH of excess:
I Tolerated starchy bosomh free from wrlnucc"
kles and irom warps
)rrld When the feller that assumed It was a
may bridegroom or a corpse.
Never had no kick a comln' if a feller
glad made a bound
. , To the dizzy realms of fashion when bin
n,s birthday conn? around,
Or .would celebrute his freedom by a
dressln' loud an' gay
A bchttln' of his sperrlts when his wife
unua would run away.
Thf 'mve practiced self-denial by a holdln'
i,,c down the tongue
swer Fur to see a feller prlmpln' when a goln*
I in. to be hung.
An' have tiled to curb our anger when
'Por_ the Ilonable Hill Swctt
ting, Togged himself to go to Denver when his
ce ? Leglf-latur' met,
But except on such occasions we have
alius tried to tramp
Mighty clus to the traditions of our free
an' easy camp. .
An' the foller that discarded of the sacred
' the ol" wool shirt
not' fur tho polished open-bneker stood a
lust chnncc o' glttln" hurt!
HI.? Poker Frank had bin to Cripple lookln'
fur an easy snap
An* had paralysed the surplus of a tender-footed
chap,
Ltlng An* to celebrabte his wlnnln' his exag
tn ?erated tusto
' * Led him into the assumption of a mnscutno
lino shirt waist.
itted 'Twas ho loud wo heerd It comln' 'bovc the
rattlln' of the stage
An' the sight of It brought on us (jultc
a fit o righteous rage!
Acted on us modest fellers in our shirts
o' faded wool
are Like tho night or a red blunket stirs the
llsm passions of a bull!
: of Wo at fust Inclined a llttlo fur to charlta10
Is bl>' think
.i..? Mcbbe ho was half demented from the
due- Cripple brand o' drink;
was Irresponsible fur chuckln' plch an Insult
at his friends,
. An' that when he got his Jag off he would
i the try to make amends;
rynn Hut he was In sassy humor, seemed to
enrv glory In his shame,
V" Asked us up to hit the miakejulcc, an'
when ,we declined the name,
( to Our unprecedented action seemed to pariifon
aly*e the gent!
' Made him meeker than a woman, fur ho
He knowed Jest what It meant!
r'Jl^ I remarked to l?nrson Hill when Frank
.,ie was strugglln' on the tree
peo- From a rope mnde of tho Karment he had
ever snorted In so free
' . That 1 renlly felt sorry wo had bin comn
ot polled to make
has Blch a quite extreme example, but our
Now honor was at stake.
* An' his rcvoraneo Jest only tuk occasion
fur to any
That It wns the Lord that glveth an' that
taketli men away,
An' ho hoped 't'd prove a wnrnln* fo the
cor- youth of nil the West
.u Io Not to nuss the sin o' fashion as a viper
,,s In tho breast!
Tho ?Denver Evening Tost.
mul- 1 ""
w of TicuniBT.R Mukumi, Ihone llchlnir,
pestering diseases of tho skin. Put nn
? end to misery. Donn'a Ointment cures.
IslriK At "ny drUK "1,lre~3Hut
*
arc OABTOHIA.
l'ork Btan th. ^ ll;i Mod Ym H.ho Always tajM
S. s,?r
iiijuk. i. i?uu.
f&W&l
URE
s sold at a low price. They
vhich is poisonous in fooa.
GOOD HUMOR IN POLITICS.
Americans Enjoy Laughing at Themselves
as "Well as at Otners.
Youth's Companion: The element of
exaggeration which enters largely Into
all characteristic American humor finds
full play In the opportunities of a presidential
campaign. Every public man
has some foible which can be mode to
furnish food for mirth. Every public
policy Is capable of being grotesquely
stated by a keen critic. It Is a peculiarity
of Americans that they not only
enjoy laughing at others, but they do
not mind being made to laugh at themselves.
But to be effective In politics and to
commend Itself to the people, humor
must be good natured. Humor which
carries with it the sting of malice overreaches
Itself. The American sense of
fair play revolts against misrepresentations
of sentiment or attacks upon
character, even when conveyed In a cartoon
or a Jest; and politicians have
learned that they do not pay. But there
Is a kind of humor so merry and goodtempered
that even the objects of It
cannot choose but join In the laugh
which It arouses; and of such humor we
can hardly have too much, ns a relief
to the strenuousness of our long presidential
campaigns.
The Weep Act.
"I see by the papers that strong men
have been weeping again," remarked an
observant citizen yeste-ay. "According
to a press telegram from Frankfort,
Ky., printed last Sunday, 'many strong
men wept' when the jury acquitted
Colonel Colson, the gentleman who recently
let a quantity of daylight into
the vitals of one Colonel Scott. This
tendency on the part of strong men to
dissolve in tears upon the slightest
provocation Is very curious," continued
the observant citizen, "and it has never
received the attention It deserves at the
hands of scientific Investigators. The
evidence on the subject seems to be
overwhelming, In fact, ever since I can
remember the newspapers have been
continually announcing that strong men
wept. On such occasions the other spectators
usually appear to have remained
calm, at least I know of nothing to
the contrary, but the muscular gentlemen
present Invariably begin to boohoo.
Just what there was about the
acquittal of Colonel Colson to cause
strong men to turn on their tearducts
Is not exactly apparent, but It Is evidently
a matter of habit. I noticed, for
Instance, that 'strong men wept' all
over London when Ladysmlth was relieved,
and only a few days ago, when
the queen paid her visit to Dublin and
everybody i?Ise was shouting himself
black In the face with delirious joy,
these same doleful strong men, according
to the cablegrams, were giving their
usual lachrymose exhibition. "When
the royal carriage finally appeared,'
said the published account, 'the enthusiasm
was Indescribable, and .strong
men wept.' ' I knew It! Confound 'em''
I said to myself. The other day my wife
was reading me an account of the production
of Rostov's new play In Paris.
'The audience went wild,' she read,
'and strong men wept,' I Interrupted.
'How did you know?' she asked In aurprlse.
'Oh, they always do,' I replied;
'they enn't help It. poor things.' 1 wish
strong men would laugh now and then.
It would be such a cheerful break in
their melancholy rccord."
NEWSPAPER WAIFS
"Old Books Sold Here?Dam Cheap"
Is the attractive legend Inscribed on a
shop In a bark street In Bombay.?
Glasgow Evening Times.
In the Darkest South.?First Citizen
?The Chinese ain't so far behind the
times as we supposed. Second Citizen
?No. indeed! I reckon they could pull
off quite a respectable lychln* bee.?
Puck.
Qulnn?Strange, about the lack of
fish yarns this summer. De Fonte?
Not at all; the fellows whousually spin
them have all got Jobs .as war. correspondents
In Shanghai.?Philadelphia
Record.
"With Regret.?"The true editorial
spirit," said the old-timer. "Is declining."
"I guess? you're right," ncreed
the struggling author, "It certainly
doesn't appear to be accepting."?Philadelphia
Press.
He Surely Does.?Watts?It seems to
be the tendency of civilization to put
the dollar ahead of the man. Potts?
That !b done in order that the man
may go after the dollar.?Indianapolis
Press.
Full of Water.?"How do you feel
now?" asked his rescuers. "Like a Jersey
Trust," gasped the half-drowned
man. faintly. Then they rolled him on
the barrel some more, for they, too,
were financiers.?Harper** Bazar.
State of Ohio, City of Toledo,
Lucas County, ss.
Frank .7. Cheney makes oath that he
Is senior partner of the firm of F. J.
Cheney & Co., doing business In the
City of Toledo, County and state aforesaid,
and that said Arm will pay the
sum of ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS
for each and every case of Catarrh
that cannot be cured by the use of
Hall's Catarrh Cure.
FRANK J. CHENEY.
Sworn to before me and subscribed
In my presence, this fith day of December.
A. D., 18S1.
[Seal.] A. W. OLEASON.
Notary Public.
Hall's Catarrh Cure Is taken Internally,
and acts directly on the blood anil
mucous surfaces of the system. Send
for testimonials, free.
F. J. CHENEY & C., Toledo, O.
Sold by druggists, 7f?e.
Hall's Family Pills are the bent.
Homeseokers' Excursions. '
" On the tlrst and third Tuesdays In
each month during 1000, from Chicago
via Chicago, Milwaukee and St. Paul
railway, to points In Iowa, South and
North Dakota, Minnesota, Montana,
Colorado, Utah. Nebrnnka, OrcKOn and
Washington at the rate of fone fare plus
two dollars for the round trip, good 21 1
days. For further information call on .
or address W. S. Howell, CI. E. P. A.,
381 Broadway, New York, or John R.
Pott. D. P. A.. 4?G William street. Will- ,
lamsport, Fa- wSs
T. 8. BHODES & CO.
HALF
PRICE
SALE.
All
Our New Shirt Waists
i Price.
All Onr New Linen Skirts
i Price.
Ladies' Parasols
1. Price.
Children's Parasols
I Price.
J. S. RHODES & CO.
i ii ?m
PUBITAN GAS RANGES.
PURITAN GAS RANGES.
Gas ranges are supplanting coal In most
up-to-date kitchens. -At the strlko of a
match you cun boll or troll, bake or Try.
roast or louat, hc&t water lor the entire
houae with a
PURITAN GAS RANGE.
It will do all that any coal range can do,
and do It quicker and chraper. No dirt.
Occupies Fmail' space. Closed oven?no
tumes irom miming pa3. uaKes periectiy.
Call and examine ihem.
NESB1TT & BRO.,
1312 Mn-krt St.
WHITE SWAN LAUNDRY.
AUTUMN SHIRTS
- . and winter shirts:
. .. spring shirts and'
& rtf. summer-shirts; night
j&ishirts and negligee
shirts and ilress
A shirts alike receive
our ^est attention
when it comes to
laundering them.- It's
so easy to spoil
/atheir appearance, you
more time, trouble
rSU&pGS#'*: nnd money to make
them right. Shirts
only? Not:hy a good deal?everything
that's washable..
WHITE SWAN LAUNDRY,
30-32 Tenth St., HawJey Block.
Telephone 560. F. R. Scrogglns.
AMUSEMENTS.
^ToperS house#
Tuesday Night, Sept. 4.
John W. Vogel and
Arthur Deming's
BIG MINSTRELS.
A great ensemble of this century's Minstrel
Celebrities, whose offerings supplant
with continual, gnltv that nervous worry
born of tedious and fatlguelng toll.
Everywhere standing room only. Houses
literally packed.'
Secure seats In advance at the Opera
House box office. Sale opens Monday at
9 a. m. -Prices, 25c; f?0c and 75c.' au30
WHEELING PARK CASINO.
Tlir?Hav 'srnfomjK.^ A 1
Matlncc and Evening
Sorrcntlno and His Famous
BANDA ROSSA.
Eugenlo Sorrcntlno, conductor. Howard
Pew, solo agent. Concerts begin: Matlneo
3:10.- Evening 8.15. Park cars after 2:15"
o'clock for mntlr.ee, and after 7 o'clock
for evening concert will bo direct to
Casino. Admission to Park and Casino:
Matinee BOc;, Evening 75c. No reserved
seats. Tickets can lie purchased at C. A.
House's music store on and after Saturday,
September 1. au30
^ItAND OPERA HOUSE.
Throe nights and Saturday matinee,'
commencing August 30, opening of tho
season. Newest furce comedy nit,
THE STAR BOARDER,
Wlth'Chas. H. Boyle and big company of
comedians, vocalists and dancers. Night
prices, 15,. 05, 35 and 50 cents. Matinee
I>rlccs. 15, 25 and 35 cents. au27
Q.HAND OPERA HOUSE.
uue Solid Week, commencing Monday,
Sept; -I. .Wednesday and Saturday matinee,
Annuni ; engagement of John A.
Hlmmclcln's Big Comedy Company.
TIIE IDEALS.
Monday evening. "In the Heart of tho
Storm." Prices 10, 20 and 30 cents. Mnt.'nee
10 anil 'JO rents. auso
STATIONERY, BOOKS, ETC.
WILL keep store open
until 9 p. m. from
Sept. 3d to 15th to
accommodate Public School
Pupils and the State Fair Visitors.
FRANK STANTON'S
Bookseller Old City
and Stationer, Book Store.
No. 1301 Market St., Wheeling, W. Va.
FOR INDEPENDENCE DAY.
Firework*. llano Halls, Masks, Bats,
OIonTh, Foot rutin, Croquet, Hammock*.
All tho latent AWfckiles, Magazines. Choup
HooUk. Stationery.
C. H. QUIMBY, I-IU Market St.
\ '
NKWV ADVERT ISEHENTS. ; '
0 a T-uVnVKBN TWBNtT-Pi RST
and TwfHy-lo\?rth streets, Milk Account
Book. >? raward will bo paid lor '
return to Intelligencer office or C' H,"
MarMi. j ^ *?el*
"\TTANTKD?AmI'QtJNG .MAN OR LADY
>V rto act as SttaSurer; also a thort order
Fi'cnch cooU,OTalc.or ictr.;Ue. and two <1
Urst-clatX ulnlnijtooom Klrlh. Aiujji have
flrst-clasjf/n'terencM. illj^JV'at wace5 p(llj
to right parties. Cll onVf. ll. L hlNTON,
Ilcinltln B\0\k, Rbom 9. Uri'ltc.
port. Ohio. ' '
"VTOTICE?T1J EROTV1LL;?K A .MRBTI
j\. ING of nil worx*.ng wen 'at Jlcrxart
Hall Saturday ovenmt. beplembcr vm
at 7 o'clock, i'or a geiilral good time and
to dlscusH tho labor question. Prominent
speakers will be presenter. M. F. Tlghv
Walter Larklns, John \ Cecil; also Mr! .
tBryun, street car man. hill bo present to
apeak. A general invitation is oxtonilcd
to all. employes of RlvrrpUlc Iron works.
By order of Spcelal Comnlttee. ?vl* . .*
ROCERS' NOTICE TO TUE Pu?
IT Die. ' \
rs'otlcc Is horcby given f.thnt all grocery
stores will , close on Monftiy, September
3. at noon on account of Lt.bor Day.' Tti?
public is therefore kindly rtquented to do
their purchasing before that hour.
By order;of the Rotall Qroncra' ProtetAv
ive Association. ''
JOHN W. KEN N EN, President.
J. C. STROEDEL, Secretary. ?cl
Flashlight Revelations
Thrilling illuminated criterthinnientab) ' Prof.
Henry P. Van J.lew at Xonh ttnet
M. E. church, Thursday. Friday 'j,nd Sat*
urday, Chimpo of aubject each j,|ght.
Course ticket for three entcrta!nm?nt? 3 1
cen|a. " / . ' :<'v - aw
YOUR PICKLES
will not be Rood without PUItFl v
SPICES. Wc have ull kind#}'
whole and ground, at ... .
Lisrs DRUG STOfcc;
IOlOMn!n Street. "
FOR SALE
OR FOR RENT.
Eesidence 011 South Front street;
Island, containing all modern conveniences.
Possession plven at once. *
Industrial Stocks bought and sold
direct on New York Stock Exchange
HOWARD HAZLETT &S0N,
National Exchange Bank Bulld'ng.
Oysters! Oysters!
The oyster season is here and wt
are ready to fill all orders with thi
finest grades of
BALTIMORE
NORFOLK,
NEW YORK
OYSTERS.
The celebrated "SEAL BRAND,"
the finest oyster in the market.
C. N. TAYLOR'S
No. 47 OYSTES
Fourteenth Street. DEPOT.
ST. JOSEPH'S ACADEMY,
WHEELING, W. VA.
This institution, conducted by the
Sisters of St. Joseph, will bo reopened
Tuesday, September 4. Curriculum
begins with kindergarten
and includes evory branch necessary
for a solid and refined education.
Commercial department forms a sepxate
course. Unremitting attention
given to pupils in Musical department.
Academy building is commodious,
with all modern improvements,
thus insuring the health, comfort
and advancement of scholars in attendance.
au31
Fruit Cans.
Johnson's Old Style, Hand Made
Charcoal Fruit Cans are just as
good as ever.. We have made a
limited quantity. Come and ge?
some.
GEO. W. JOHNSON'S SONS,
1210 Main Street.
NOTICE TO DOG OWNERS.
Whereas. In my opinion, ^lydronhobU
exists within the city, owners or (lop
will take notice that on and after September
3 dogs found nt large In violation
of the provisions of the ordinance will be
killed.
A. T. SWEENEY, Mayor.
An Ordinance in Relation to Dogs,
Passed January 18, 1881.
Sec. 7. Whenever the mayor fhall b?
satisfied that any case of hydrophobia lus
appeared among the dogs In tno city, he
snail Issue his proclamation requiring nil
persons to confine their dogs, or to have
same securely muzzled, for such time fron
and after the issuing of such proclamation
us lib shall therein appoint, and It
any animal of tho dog kind snail be found
at large in tho said, city during the time
so appointed, without being propeny anu
securely muzzled, the same may be killed
by any person whatever, and the owT.fr
and keener thereof shall forfelt.'and pay
to the city a line of not less than ten rjor.
more than twenty dollars for every such
offense, and costa of prosecution, id
SCHOOL BOOKS.
Our stock of School Books and
School Supplies is now complete. A
flno book coyer given with every
book. Remember the No. is 1303
Market street.
ALBERT DITTMAR.^
T- 1ST OP' LETTERS REMAINING IN*
J the" postofflce nt Wheeling. Ohio county,
"W. Vii.; Saturday, flout. 1. To t^ljtnln
any or the following the applicant. must
ask for advertised lotters, giving data o:
Hat:
ladies; list.
Boyce, Mltis Rosoy llondorson.'June
.Hlake, Miss Francos Logan, ;Mlss >1 airl
Dranlok, Miss Mary Lnnnlng, Miss Gra<*
Durst, Mrs. John MoCurten, Mr*. J-yDolcn,
Miss Aviv Miller, Miss Mliinlo
Flint, MIhh Annlo. Morgans, Mrs.Helsor,
Mrs. llertha Teamah, Mrs. Ida W
Harris, Mrs. A. R
GENTLEMEN'S LIST.
Adams, Richard Herman, Jno.
Adams, Green Johnson, J. ?
Heaver, Austin Korlng, Matthew
Houldon, 10. Layne, J. A..
Hates. Charles M. Leslie. O. G.
Barnard, James H. Lupkovle, Mltar
Hums, \\\ Mcuae. C. L.
Hrady, James. M, . Mlessor,. Geqrxe
Burgess. C. -1L * McCluskev. \\. H.
Commlssel. W, S. McCune, llnrry v.
Cook, G. \\*. Nousom, J. A.
Clarke, Frank > Fonn, A. J.,
Eokert, John Steel, Thomas
11 a rasa, WYs.n , Thompson, \\- U.
Hogg, T. G. ; Hjison; N. Li,' '
Hoonon, Gottfried Wiser, Frank R
FIRMS.
Atlantic .Rooting Co. .
UKOltUE (V1SB, Poitnull"'

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