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THE NATIONAL BANK OF AUGUSTA L. C. HATXE, Pres't. F. G. FORD, Cashlor. Capital, ?250,000. } 8110,000. Facilitie; vi "ur magnificent New Vault outaining 410 t-afoty-Locfe Boxes. Differ ent Sizes urn offered to our patrons and tho public at $3.00 to 310.00.per annum. THOS. J. ADAMS PROPRIETOR. ?bG?FIELD, . s VA M. THE PLANTERS LOAN AND SAVINGS BARK. AUGUSTA, QA. Pays Intcrost I on Deposita, j Account Solicited, h. C. HAINS, President. W. C. WABDLAW, Cashier. VOL. LXIV. NO. 24. NATURE'S "There hain't no summer cominV said tho grumbler ia dismay. And he trudged throughout the woodlands where the leaneys trocs stood guard, VThero the scene around bim darkened and all Nature's grace was marred. * By the blasts of cold midwinter that had sternly held their stray. But above a ruffled red-breast thrilled a happy little song. And a sparrow chirped with pleasure as h? winged his way along. **Thero hain't no summer comiu'." Why. since now the sky is dark, Must the sun forever leave us just because it rests awhile? Can't the frowns of bleak December be re placed by May time's smile? ? THE SILENCE OF BY J. I*? ?? "I wish, to goodnessSiineou Savles, that yon would shut ftp and keep shut up!" said Myra Sayles in a weary tone and speaking as if the words" were forced from iu-r against her will, 'Too do.'hey?" replied her brother Simeon, sharply and irritably. rte had been scolding about some trifling matter for ?early half au hour, and his sister Myra had listened iu patient silence. Now she spoke be cause he had said something peculiar ly annoying, and when he ha l replied so sharply vue said: "Yes, I mean it, Simeon Sayles. I get r;o sick and tired of yonr eternal scolding and blaming that I just wish sometimes you'd shut your mouth and . ?ever open it again while vou live." ""Yon do, hev?" ?'?es, Ido."" ^ There was a sullen silence ia the room for three or four minutes; the wrinkles on Simeon's brow deepened, and his lips were pressed more and moro lightly together. Suddenly he opened them with a snap and a defiant toss of his head. "Very well, Myra Say!es, I will '.shut up,' and I'il stay ?shut up,' and ^you'll see how you like it." "I'll have some peace, then," re plied Myra, shortly. Yet she looked at her brother curiously. Th? Sayleses wore "noted iu the country roundabout for rigidly adher ing to every resolution they made. The thought now came into Myra's mind, "Will he do it?" She had not meant him to 4ake her remark literal ly. Simeon was as iron-willed as auy of the family, aud yet Myra felt that he could not keep such a vow lon". It was necessary for him to talk. So she said: "I guess you'll ba gabbling away fast enough before night. There's no such good luck as your keeping still mt very lon". " - . !_ P*-- dlBrooiy um a ^iro~r ep'iy. oui zoos, -ui-r old straw hat from a nail behind the door aud went out into the barnyard, walking very erect, but with little jerks, indicating *bat the Sayles tem per was high in him. "Now he'll go out to the barn and putch around ont there a while and maybe patch all evening in the house ' and then talk a bine streak all day to morrow to make np for the time he's lost keeping still. I declare, if the men-folks can't be the tryiugest!" She stitched away steadily on the sheet she was turning until the clock struck 6, when she jumped up hastily. "Mercy," she exclaimed, "I'd no idea it wa3 so late! I hope to good ness the tire hain't gone out. I must get the kettle on and supper ready. I did intend making some of the flannel cakes Simeon like3 30 much, to put him in good humor,but I don't believe I tdiall have time now." Nevertheless, there was a plate-of steaming hot "liar.iel cakes" and a bowl of maple syrup before Simeon's plate when he came in to supper half an hour later. He ate the cakes in stubborn si lence. "Are you goiug to Seth Badger's after sup'per," Myra asked, "to see him about helping you c. fe that grass tomorrow?" After waiting in vain for the answer, Myra said: "I want to know it if you do go, be cause I want to send Mrs. Badger a ?waist pattern of hers I borrowed lasl week." , No reply from Simeon. His sistei gave her head an impatient toss, anc they finished the meal in silence When it was done Simeon went to 1 little table in a corner of the room pulled out the drawer and took iron it a scrap of blank paper and a stub o a lead pencil. Myra took the supper dishes inti the kitchen; when she came into th room again Simeon handed her th< scrap of paper. On it was written: " I'm a-going over to Badger' now." Myra dropped the bit of paper o the floor and stared hard at hi brother. "Well, Simeon Sayles!" she said t last. "I call this carrying mattel pretty far. Before ' I'd make myse so ridiculous, I'd- What you goir to do when you g3t over to Badger's You'll look smart writing out win you've got to say over there,now won yon? You'll make yourself the langi ingst?ck of the country if yon f around writing out what you've got say when you've got as good a tongi in your head as anybody." Simeon made no reply, but pick< up the bit of pencil and wrote < another scrap of paper: "Whare is that patern?" "I think you'd better learn to spj before you go to conversing in writi - spelling 'where'with au 'a' and 'p tern'with only one Xl If you do: get sick and tired of this sort o., to foolery before two days, I miss 1 guess, Simeon Sayles!'* Whether ho grew tired of it or n Simeon Sayles .said all he had to sa\ writing frx?m that time forth. His 01 reply to his sister's ridicule and monstrances was written in th words: "Yon sed you wisht I'd shut up mouth and keep it shut, and '. a-going to do it." Ho bought a little Wauk book . which he kepi- a pencil, and a 1 commiiiiic.ttions to the world ant individuals were made through medium of this book aud pencil. The neighbors said that " Say.'eses always were a queer lot, t REPROOF. "Why, the songsters are ia tra?ning,and we'll soon hear from the lark. Bads are pooping out o'eT hillocks; treos are smiling through the min, That will make them love the sunshine when ?? comes to them again. "There hain't no summer comm'," but ndown one storm-strewn dell Romped a playful squirrel, happy in the knowledge of a day That was soon to bring its blessings and the Violets of May. While some stream "in gurgling protest, as upon the moss it fell, Mingled music or tho sunshine with thc music of the rain, And roused up a sleeping flower that for months bad lifeless lain. -W. Livingston Lamed. SIMEON S?YLE8. ===== fr ARBOUR. how;" that some of Simeon's ancestors had beeu rather eccentric, *ud that Simeon himself had never seemed quite like other men. No matter how true thi3 maj have been, his sister Myra was a thoroughly well-balanced womau, with a large fund of strong common seuse.aud her brother's freak caused her great secret mortification aud distress, although she had de clared at the beginniug of it: "It will be an actual rest to me to get rid of your eternal scolding!" But Simeon had not scolded "eter nally," as Myra felt obliged to confess to herself in her reflective moments. He was, indeed, somewhat infirm of temper aud sometimes gavo himself dji to prolonged nts of peiulunce, bu. there had beeu days and even weeks at a time when Simeou had beeu as serene of mind and as companionable as any man. Ho and his sister Myra had sat sid? by side ou the little' porch over the front door of their old red farmhouse throughout many a peaceful summer evening, quietly talking over the past aud the future. The loug winter even iugs had often beeu tilled with a quiet happiness and peace for them both, ns they sat at the same hearthstone at which their parents had sat, Myra with ber knitting aud Simeou reading ? aloud or ? moking his pipe in peace. ! They bad nearly always eaten their 1 meals in harmony, and now, as they ] sat at the table facing each other in 1 hard, cold silence, there were times i when, although neither would have confessed it to the other, their food al- 1 most choked them. 1 "This freak ot his is harder to nut 1 up with at the fable thau at any other 1 place or time," his sister confessed to ' a sympathetic neighbor. "Sometimes \ it just seeui3 as if I'd fly. There he ? sits as mum as a grindstone. Some- Jj nothing' was the matter, but lean ~] never keep it up very long. I've tried all sorts of little tricks to catch him 1 unawares aud make him speak once, but he won't be caught. One day, just when he'd come iu from the field, I smelt something burning so strong that I said, 'I do believe tba house is on fire,' and lift opened bis mouth as . if to speak and then clapped it shut again and whipped oat that abominable little book and wrote, 'Whare?' "I was so put out that I flung the book clear out into the gooseberry bushes. I really doubt if he ever does speak again in this world, aud the prospect is pleasant for me, isn't it?" The two lived alone in the old red farmhouse in which they had been I: i 50 years before. They were without kith or kiu in the world with the ex- | ceptiou of a much younger sister j named Hope,who had married a ]iros- | porous young farmer and bad gone ; out west to live. It had beer, a time j of great sorrow to them when this I pretty.youugsister had married Henry Norton and gone from the old house. They rejoiced in her happiness, of j course, aud were quite sure that Hope j bad "done well," but it was none the less hard to give ber up. She was only 21 years old at the timo and so much younger than her brother and sister that their affection for her was much like that of a father and a mother for an on'y child. They had lavished the tenderest love of their lives ou Hope,and their affection had not lesseued by ber absence. In the years since they bad seca Hope's pretty face aud heard her cheery voice they ofteu talked of her. Myra had always stood as a strong wall between Hope and barm or trouble of any kind, and this loving thought fulness had kept her from writing a word to her sister about their brother's strange silence. "I wouldn't have Hope know it for anything," Myra bad said; "it would worry the child SD. And there's no danger of Simeon writing it. He'd be ashamed to." During all the fall and through one whole long,, wretched winter the iron willed Simeon kept bis resolve not tc speak,and a decided shake of his head or a written "No" was bis reply tc Myra's often repeated question, "Don'' you ever intend to speak again?" One dayin May a neighbor, coming from the town, brought Myra a lette that gave to her troubled heart tin wildest thrill of joy it bad known fo: mauy a day. Hope was coming home She had written to say that she woul< arrive on Wednesday of the followini week with ber little girl of three year and that they would spend the cntir summer in thc old home. Catching up her sunbonnet, Myr ran all the way to the distant field i which Simeou was at work, holdin the letter out as she ran aud callin ont before she reached him: "0 Simeon! Simeon! A lett? from Hope! Sue's coming boim She'll be here next week with ber li tie Grace, that we've never seen! On' think of it -Hope's coming home!" Simeon was plowing. He veined t his horses with a jerk and opened ai shut his mouth three or four time but no sound came from his lips. H face wore a half-wild, balf-frigbtem look,aud bis baud trembled as be he it ont for the letter. "Simeon! Simeou!" cried Myi with quivering voice and tearful ey? "surely you'll have to speak now!" He shook bis head slowly aud sac' as he sat down on the ? low to rend \ letter. He banded it bade in silei aud turned away his bead when saw the tears streaming down Myr I cheeks, and he bit his lip until it most bled -when be beard ber she turned to go back to the hi When he came to dinner he ri lotter again, but-he and Myr? silence. Hope came a week from th; Myra went to. railroad statioi miles distant to meet her. "It'll be better for me .to mi than for you, if you are bound ? termined to keep up this no while she's here," said Myra, doesn't know a thing about il may be*sure I haven't written ; of it to the poor child, and I di tell her of it now. It's a shnmo.i ing shame,Simeon Sayles, for ; spoil Hope's firet visit home just t" ont a silly vow that it was wicfc yon ever to make in the first It's a piece of wickedness straight through!'* A visible pallor had come into eon's face at the mention of ? little girl: No ode knew how and how tenderly this little girl he had never seed , had been thoughts; H? was fond of chi and uo child in the world could dear to him as this little girl ->f H He and Myra had looked iorwa eagerly to the time whoa Hope s bring her to thom, and they r? proudly of all herinfautilecharm accomplishments as set forth in H letters! He stole softly into tho sel opened parlor when Myra had | Several photographs of Hope's girl, taken at different stages of infantile career, were iu the albu the parlor table. Simeon took UT album and gazed at these photogr; oue by one, with unhappy eye?. He wandered round the housi yard until the time drew neai Myra's return with Hope and Grace. Then ho went down the to meet them. He had gone pei fi quarter of a mile when he sat ( by the wayside to wait until should drive around a turn in the a hundred yards or more distant. He had waited not more than minutes when he heard the soun ivheels and voices around the cur1 the roar!. He heard the sudden, s laugh of a child aud was on his fei xn iuotant. At that saina instaut a man on i uyele dashed past him. Bicycles : still au almost unheard of" thin: chat part of tho country. Simeon never seeu but three or four of tl iud the appearance of this one wi mg alou^' at such speed startled 1 Its rider sent it fiyiug on down .oad, aud it whirled around the cn: co the surprise of Miss Myra au che terror of old Hector, the horse ivas driving. The reins were lj Loosely in Myra's hands, and be: ?he could gather them up old He< ?umped aside, reariug and piungi uag^?af^ gVaitfflaMoitTOf stag lim, while Hope cluug to little Gi xud screamed. "Whoa! Whoa,Hector!" cried M in a voice so awful with terror tha1 frightened old Hector the more. "Whoa, Hector, whoa!" This time old Hector pricked up ears, for the voic3 that spoke wa firm, commanding ono, aud the r moment a strong hand grasped bridle while the voice repeated: "Whoa! Wheal" It was a harsh, steru voice, bul sounded like the sweetest piusi Myra's cars. It was Simeon's, Simeon was holding to tho bit. held it until old Hector came to a 1 and then he turned and said calml; "Don't be scared, Hopo, ch vou're all right now. Give me little one." He held out his arms and Hope the little girl into them, saying as did so: "It's your Uncle Simmy, dear! your arms around his neck and | him a kiss, and let him hear how 1 you eau say 'Uncle Simmy.'" A pair of soft little arms stole aro Simeon's sunburned neck; a soft, li j cheek was laid on his rough, bear oue, aud when she had kissed twice she said: "Dee Nuacle-Xhinimy!" "The blessed littlecreeturl" he s winking his eyes and hugging close to his heart. Aiyl when she and her mother T asleep iu Hope's old room that ni I Simeon came iuto the kitchen wi ! Myra was setting some bread to aud softly humming a gospel hym praise out of the joy of her heart, Simeon said: "Well, Myra-" "Well, Simeou?" "Well-er-well, what did I say, anyhow, wheu yon told her?' 4 'When I told her* what ? Ob, al your-your-la, Simeou, the mini clapped eyes on that blessed chi knew there wasn't auy use iu tel Hope anything about it. I knew y just have to speak to that baby! [ I never lisped a syllable about i , aHope, and she never shall km [ word about it if I can help it. I , you'd fetch me in a basket of nice t chips. The'moou shines so bright can" see to pick them up. I wa r quick lire in the morning, so I can r hot biscuits for Hope's breakfast. a alwavs was so loud of them." r Aud Simeon took the chip-bi i and went out iuto the moonlight I long-silent lips softly humming y same song of praise Myra had I singing.-Youth's Companion. e A Wailer's Dilemma. a It was in one of the large down n restaurants that the short little ; g an and lier tall husband went for rr ner one night last week. "Will yon have oysters?" askei ?r man, glancing over the bill of far B! "Yes," said the short little wo tl as she tried in vain to touch her |y to the floor. "And, John, Iw hassock." lp Johu nodded, aud, as he hande ul order to the waiter, he said, ''Yes a- bring a hassock for the lady." is "One hassock?" asked the wi ad ! with what John thought more ld ordinary interest, as he nodded ii I affirmative. Still tho waiter di< .a ! go, but brushed tho tablecloth w js* j towel and rearranged the articles ' ' I several time*, while his face gov Uv i red. Thoa he came around to J> i/o 1 sid ?, an \ t; ?. i*4*? sofcto voce' ,ce ?Vnv.inis?er.I haven't been hero he I and I' ?? not on t > all these th a's ! Will the I- Iv have the hassock bi ol. I or flied: '-Chicago Chronicler. . > Trofessor Guglielmo Marconi, the in Visit America next fall, is only twenty-fi won him fame and fortune. He began ! Government gladly paid him a high prie ships. Then ho removed to England, ventor in his line, and has been the mo men who are working upon wireless tel? England, in which he sent a message w miles, were perfectly successful. Mar the French to the Euglish coast, but fused. Learning, however, that the Qt matter, the French Government agreed tion on its soil. He says the system co: Pe ut i I I no i'd So to r a ish Iry ?ou ) a ive She ket his the en Dwn ora cliu the ian, toes nt a I his ,aud. iter, than i the I not i th a on i very >hn'a said, long, ?UgK. oiled IFUNST?N'S STIRRING CAREER! & Has Sought Adventure in Many Places SS 3$ and Has Never Shirked Danger. g A red-headed man voice, is making the sas tho most famou mont now figlitiug tl only weighs 115'poi fight. More than t ) Tfafl Story nf Ttrinrn from, the exploits of ? pauy," a romance of than a matter-of-fac a nineteenth centu done. Funston's character as a soioier uuu combatant is summed up in the terso expression of one of his own men "bottled vitriol." The Twentieth Kausas is not a regi ment composed of handsome meu. As a beauty show .it would go into bank ruptcy. So far as possible every man in it was selected for his ability to cu dure and fight and not with a view to his good looks. The selection of the men wa3 largely left- to Funstou, aud that his Judgment was exceptionally good is proved by the terrible deeds his men aro porformiog on the islaud of Luzon. The mer. are Kaunas farmers, of the horny-handed type, bullwhackers from the plains, blacksmiths, city laborers, descendants not only of thc old Free Soil settlers, but of the early Confed erate rangers; meu who can shoot, swim, live on air, and sing a hymn. Fuuston fought in Cuba with the Cuban army until the destruction of the Maine brough', bim back to bis own country. He is but thirty-thrco years old, yet be has engaged in twenty-three battles in Cuba and six or more in Luzon. His left arm has been mutilated for life by a shell, his lungs pierced by a Manser bullet, his thigh crushed by a horse plunging during battle, his system racked by BRIGADIEU-GENER. Cuban feverv He was captured by 1 Spaniards in Cuba and sentenced death, but escaped While on an pedition to Alaska he was pitched i the Tnkon Piiver and narrowly esca] drowning. Within the cucumfere of the arctic circle be was nearly fi o to death, aud then fought pneumn tothe very door of death. Of pra cally uo physique, but live feet f in ehe? iu height, bis endurance escape nia'i:n bim one of the most markablo personages connected i the American array. ventor o? wireless telegraphy, who will ve yearspld, but his work has already experiments in Italy, and the Italian se for th? use of his invention on war He is admittedly the foremost in st successful of the numerous scientific Jgraphy.r . His recent experiments in itbont wires for a distance of thirty coni proposed to send a message from the French Government at first re aman Emperor was investigating the to permit'Marconi to build his sta tild be operated across the Atlantic. Love-making and fighting are all ono to nie tj.vave General Funston. He wooed a$d won his pretty wife with the same) vim he showed in battle. He met MisKEdna Blaukard, of Oakland, Cal., a lnjusic teacher, while in camp MRS. EDXA ULAVKAnD FCXSTOX. in San Francisco, and married her in three weeks' .time. She is with him in the: Philippines, having been smuggled on board a trausport by her ; husband in thc disguise of a soldier boy. ? _ Queer Pince For a Oinelerj. The Honolulu authorities ara consid ering the advisability of locating a cem etery in the crater of the Punchbowl, an extinct volcano. The only ob jection thus far offered is that if not used for a cemetery it might some day become available for an amusement resort and residence section, espec ially if an adequate water supply could be conveyed to so groat a height. Says the Hawaiian Gazette: "Every thing looks beautiful inside the crater. Tho Mawe trees are growing well. These and other trees were planted by the direction of the late Kiug Kala kauo,. The lantana nourishes, of course, The view in any and every directhn from Punchbowl is well known to all for its charm. A walk \L FR) ERICK FUNSTON. the to ex nto jed nee zen mia cti bur and xe vith fri the city to the place would ni bt trying undertaking and the roa isettei* than ever." Future of Funston. should Funston survive the Lu::c cipaign, he is fairly destined to b oe one of the heroic figures of tl iericau army. Bisjuen idolize hit I appears to have just as much e alive ability as ho does fightir brit. His judgment bas never be< ?estioued; and he stands foremo tong the American commanders doii SKI S with the Filipinos. HOME-LIFE OF AGUINALDO,' ls Motlier, Sliter mid Wife Are' Carina For the Insurgent Wounded. Tho character and life of Felipe gninaldo, ibo Filipino leader and encrai of Iho insurgents w,ho have :b?!lcd against the authority of the failed States, aro somewhat familiar ) the people of this country. Aguin Ido, however, has a wife, mother ud sister, to whom very little atten ion has been directed. MOTHER OF AGUIN'AL THE FILIPINO The insurgent let is now about thirty years of age. e is a mestizo -that is, of mixed Sj is? and native blood. He is of mea a height and slender in appearance, ' bese physical characteristics being common to the Filipino. Aguinaldo's father was a planter in the province of Cavite. His mother has Chinese blood coursing through her veins, being the daughter of a Chinaman and a native woman. Aguinaldo's grandfather, on his father's side, was a Spaniard, who married a native woman, and hence the racial features of Aguinaldo are accounted foi*. Aguinaldo's mother has had little to do with the career of her son, for he was sent away at an earlv ace. His yji ^.yuiuuiuo o wno very little is known. She has been doing good work among tho soldiers of her hus* band's army in attending to the sick. She has organized a hospital corps, somewhat modelled after our Eed Cross Society, and in many ways baa MISS AGUINALDO Y JAMY. (Sister of the Filipino leader.) made herself useful to the arm j There is a pretty 3tory told of Agnir lido's wooing, but how much trnt there is in it it is impossible to tell During tho lirst rebellion agaim Spain, when the Spanish soldiers wer committing almost every outrage cor ceivable on tile Filipinos, a troop ( soldiers was sent to arrest a plant? who was supposed to be aiding th rebels. Somehow Aguinaldo heard? the intended capture, aud, at a grei risk to himself, went to the planter house, informed him of his dango and took him and his daughter to place of safery. While in retrei Aguinaldo's kindness to them, i many ways saving them from captnr softened tho heart of the planter's fa daughter, and Aguinaldo made love her after the fashion of the Filiph youth, which does not differ matei ally from tho fashion the wide wor over. In tho course of time they we married. ?Marketing in Cuba. Probably une of tho most peculi customs noticeable in the Cuban mu kets is tho extremely small purchas -small in quantity-made by tl lower class of natives. Small gou cups holdiug scarcely more than tablespoonful are used in measuri: rice, flour, beans and peas. Cabbag are cut in wedges the. size of a C?K? turnips into eighths, squashes ic minute chunks and odious in halv< Potatoes aro sold by number. It is no uncommon thing to see woman buy a piece of meat weighi a couple ounces then'pass through t market, purchasing a tablespoonful vegetables here aud a piece of gar there, and finally, after an hour gossip, depart with food produ worth five or six cents.-Philadelpl Inquirer. ?N ?D? DEPOSITOR* Sis Methods Foolei? the Mun Who StoojJ Behind the Desk. The cashier of a thriving bank in a jig western town was doing the talk ing. "When I began my career in tue banking business," he said/ "it was in an old established bank in au Ohio city to which my father had beeu elected president. We didn't live in the town until his election and moved there when he took charge. After about six months' experience I was made assistaut receiving teller, and between that and my youth, aud the fact that my father was president, I guess I was about four sizes too large for the earth. But I got over it, and one day'when there was a lull and tho receiving teller had gone across tho street to look after a check that he had taken1 i popped up'to the window and took my first lesson. A rough-look ing old fe'lldw came in that I thought was a farmer from Hay vii le. He came straight for me',- a'?d srii? that he wanted to deposit som'e money. It wasn't my business' to Undertake a new customer, but I thought I knew it all, and began to talk to him. He said he wanted to deposit a cent that day, but had more. Well, I gave him the ha ha then and there, and to'.d him to run around to the Dime Savings Bank and become a depositor on the installment plan. I also said some more funny things, and after I had had all the fun there was he said that while he wished to deposit only a cent that day, he would put ia two cents next day, and four next, and so on for four weeks; I gave him tba laugh again and told him we really couldn't do a small business like that, and he must be a good boy and run along to the penny auto bank around tho cor ner. Tilda he went away and I was still laughing when the receiving teller came back. "I told him what waa making me smile and he looked' at me kind of funny, I thought, and went to figur ing on a sheet of paper without further comment. Presently lie handed the paper over to nie. 'That old fellow,' he said, is . millionaire, whose business we hare been after for a year. Those figures will show you that what you consider is a penny I ante bank business would have amounted to something over $210,000 in four weeks or twenty-four banking days, during which he wished to de posit his money. He's a crank, but he's got the cash, all the same, and we want him. Just what effect your abln fnnnv business has had upon -Washington Star. A .Slight Misnnderktandint*. The expert in handwriting had made A number of very interesting and con vincing demonstrations with a piece of chalk on tue blackboard. He would flourish a few lines and then stand back and describe them, and the^yury was profoundly impressed.?. - "This," he said, holding a piece of paper out beipre-uiin ia his left hand, while with Iris right he made passes i? freatof the blackboard so as to get ft running start, "is the handwriting of a person who is not used to ham ling a pen; not necessarily an nued . cated person. It might be one w .0 had been so much iu the habit of dic tating all correspondence that his handwriting failed to settle iuio any permanent style or had drifted into unsteadiness through lack of prac tice. " The testimony did not have any par ticular bearing on the case, but the jury looked at one another and the spectators nodded their heads signifi cantly. "The weakness of the npward strokes especially indicate that this ia the handwriting of one who is not ae cu s to med to clerical labor, while the intelligence is shown in punctua tion." "May the court please," exclaimed a man who had been on the witnest stand a short time before, and wlu had been fumbling through bis pock ets. The expert paused and everybody turned to look at the man who har, made the interruption. "May it please the court," ho re peated, with much embarrassment there is a mistake here. The expor has boen testifying as to handwrit ing." "Of course, "said the expert. "Tha .is what I am here for." "Well," the paper he has been talk ing about is not tho one I meant t hand to tho prosecuting attorney, got the documents confused, some how, aud what he has is a letter frot an old friend of mine-a mau whom met long ago when I was in the dim museum business. He writes to m very frequently to let me know ho he is getting along. He was the arn less phenomenon. Judge, your hoi or, that ain't handwriting at all. It foot writing." Wonderful Food Condensation. A retired olficer of the British Roy artillery is reported to have invente a new food which is thought to off? inestimable advantages lor purpose of military and naval sustentation. Tl new food has been subjected to tl severest tests, and it is declared I experts that it has succeeded in tl very point wherein all other condense foods have failed - the preservation the flavor as well as the food qualiti of the original article. Eggs, mea fish and vegetables have all been su cessfully treated. Fifty-three pou m of this food, occupying oue cubic fo of space, is equal to the carcasses 13 1-2 sheep. Thin a '?000-tou vess could carry the equivalent of '?24 000,000 pounds of ra at, or ratio enough for th i;,whole population tho jjriiish alas fo eight days. T war o Bice, which is hiking up the i vention, preserves the strictest sevre as to the 11-etliodd ot condensation ej pl.. ved, rbis ls tba Queen of Nonsense Land, ihe wears ber bonnet on ber band; >be carpets ber ceilings and frescoes ber floors. ibo eats on ber windows and sleeps on her .doors. )b, ho ! Oh. bo I to think there eouid be i. lady so silly-doW?-dilly as abe J >ha goes for a walk on an ocean wave, ibo Ashes for cats in a coral cave-, 5he drinks from an empty glass of milk, ind lines ber potato trees with silk, ['rn sure that forever and never was seen 3o foolish a thing as the Nonsense Queen f Jhe ordered a wig for a blue bottle fly, ind she wrote a note to a pumpkin pie; 3be makes ali the oysters wear emerald ringa, ind does dozens of other nonsensible things. Oh ! the scatterbrained, sbatterbrained lady BO grand. Her Boyal ??kybigbness of Nonsense Land! Carolyn Wells, in Puck. HUMOROUS. A boy of 15 thinks he is too old to ran errands, bnt after he is 25 and married he begins again. "Cousin Josephine hides her deaf ness with great tact" "How?" "She talks all the time." "D'ye*r think Bunker's renched the age of discretion yet?" "Well, hard ly I He's getting married for the third time. " Old Gentleman (to convict)-What is the most objectionable feature you find in prison life, my dear friend? Convict-Wisitors. "Love ievels all things," sighed the sad-eyed swain, with a paug of pain, as his sweetheart sat on his new high, silk hat and smashed it fiat. "What are you doing, Tommy?" "S'audin' before the lookin' glass," said Tomir ; "I wanted to see howl would look if I was twins." His Daughter-Yes, the story ends in the same old way; they many and' live happy ever after. The Furniture Man-Ah ! Antique finish ! He kissed her! She neither drew back nor turned red, And she did not deliver a slap on bis car; He kissed her ! No word by the lady waa said Sbe had ceased to be thrilled-they'd been married a year. Mother-Dear me! The baby has swallowed that piece of worsted. Father-That's nothing to the yarns she'll have to swallow,.:if she lives to grow up. Teacher-Johnny, you must stay after school and work two examples. Johnny-What, and get fired from the Scholars' union for working over i:-0 Not much ! SO?" nv - "That's what they au ^ttj^~.~..iy. Don't you believe,Jib-a "until he ?Toes it," y Teachfti^-Once upon a time there weve"Wo rich men, one of whom made his fortune by honest industry, while the other made h:s by fraud. Now, which of these two men wonld yon prefer to be? Tommy (after a mo ment's hesitation)-Which made the most? The Caves of Porto Rico. I It is astonishing how little is known about the geology of the island of Porto Rico and the profouud manifes tations which nature has there made of her power in earth-making. At Ponce, San Juan and Cayez noone knew of caves in the land; the j.eople had all heard rumors of mineral wealth, but could not definitely state tho localities. Even at Caguas, six miles away from a great tavern which may develop into as much of a wouder as our own Mammoth cave, few people have ever heard of it, and no one has ever seen the interior of its expansive chambers. At Aguas Bnenas, t? hich lies five miles to the westward from Caguas, the people of the little village were aware of great holes in the" mountains toward the south, but only two negroes had ever explored them and they only to a limited extent. The owner of this unknown marvel of Porto Rico is Senor Munoz, a large coffee-planter. He told us th t sev eral years ago an Englishman, a mem ber of some British scientific society, had paid a short visit to the cavern and was much interested, and it is quite likely that a report of its won ders has been published in the scien tific journals of Great Britain. The expedition to this cavern, known as the "Dark Cave," is filled with al most as many surprises to the exploder as the actual fiaish of the journey, en vironed in walls of white and pendent stalactites, a mile beneath the eaith's Burface.-Harper's Weekly. K om an stace Carpentry. The excavations now going on in the Theatre of Dugga, ia Tunis, sh >w that the Romans possessed for their theatres a system of stage carpentry equal if not superior to the appliances now in use. An ingenious contrivance enabled those who stood underneath the stage to see what was proceeding above. A number of trapdoors opened in the centre of the stage, and grooves have been discovered showing the way in which scenery and stage fur niture were lowered and raised Eight large holes led to several dry wells three yards deep under the stage, while a large receptacle served to store the curtain during the performance. Tho floor of the stage was covered with mosaics.-Rome Correspondence of the London Poet. Whero Moliere Died. For many years it has been a muoh disputed point whether Moliere died at Xo. 34 or No. 40 Rue de RicheXeu, Paris, France, and whether 34 or 40 should bear the bronze tablet. Both houses had their partisans, which caused many marr?is. At hist it has been decided it wa-i in Xo. 10 that the g oat writer of co:i.e ies .Jed. Tl e increase in tue number of rfiqf ?ila' ...siciiins ii Bc lin, Germany, since 187s) hus been 172 per cont,