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The Newberry herald. (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, May 08, 1884, Image 1

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A Family Companion, Devoted to Literature, Miscellany, News, Agriculture, Markets, &c.
Vol X NEWBERRY, S. C., THURSDAY, M31AY 8, 1884. No. 19.
At Newberry, S. C.
Editor and Proprietor
Terms, $2.00 per .funnm,
Invariably in Advance.
y- The paper Is stopped at the expiration of
ime for which it is paid.
n:j The M mark denotes expiration of
I respectfully announce that my
-Is now ready for inspection.
Suits in Broad Cloth, Worsted and
(assimeres of Latest Styles, Finest
Made Garments-and the very
A choice line of Handsome and Servi
ceable Spring Clothing for
Noted for its make up, Newness in
Designs and Cheapness in Price.
A handsome line of Furnishing Goods.
Shirts. Collars, and Cuffs, Silk and
Linen Handkerchiefs. Hosiery in all of
the Fashionable Colors.
The Latest Novelties in Men's Neck
Wear, made up in an elegant variety
of New Silk designs and Shapes.
et Styles-all sizes, shapes and
colors for Men and Boys.
Cor* ST & Son's.
" D MADE Shoes.
ed.) il Congress
Celebrated t iquarters for
(Every Pair Wari - These
Button or L-ice, and L
Summer, with any shaped to.
shoes have no superior in Fit, Style, r
Also a nice line of Trunks, Travel
ig Umbrellas and Walking Canes.
A I on
I I\ I by
When Lovely Womu!
Smiles we naturally look for that -
row of pearls so fitting to fair features,
how often we are disappointed every
one knows. Those brown stains and
tartar deposits can be removed with
out injury to the teeth by using
Wood's Odentinle which dloes
its work harmnlessly and eff'eetually. tu
'Try it at once 25c. a box. ha
Wholesale Agent. Columbia. S. C. r
For sale in Newberry. Mar. 17tf. tb
Off'ers. Estra Bargain '.
You wizll Savie Money.
By buying from his an
Fall and Winter selected stock of Al
Boots, Shoes, A
(Jiothing, Trunks, "
Hats, Notions,
Groceries, &c.
42-t[ 12
mother's Friend.
Read and ponder the words of praise-unsolicit
, volunt7 testimonials-that have beeni sent
o me. selected from hundreds recvd from grate
SdiZtinguished physiciani of MiLsissippi writes: t
conind o setea 3 otiier's Friend.'fo
during atlonlg obs.tetric practice I have never known th
Ii to fail to produce a quiek and safe delivery."
An-ther says: "My wife used the 'Mother's
Friend '(Holmes' Liniment) in her fouirth confine-c
e suferiu of eihr of her frmer onfincetz
d recovered in much less time." R
A lady patienitwho used the " Friend," said afterB
her eo~nement: "I have never seen one ps
trough this triail so easily and with so littloeluer. E1
in God bless the iscoverer of Holmes'
An ent.r'enced midwife writes: "I amdeligh~t: di
ed with the 'Mother's Friend.' In ever~ in et
ance where I have known It used its effects Xave ite
been,all I could ask. I consider it a great bless. c<
lady of Huntsvile, Ala., moving in the highest CE
cuee, writes recentl-; " I have tried 'Mother's er
Fred' (Holmes' Liniment) and can truthfully Li
gay it is a most exeell preparation. I freely A
eomend It to all" 0
Fres Si.50 pettle. Sent by Expresn R
eeipt of the price.
Sold by,aal druists.
Mo. 1065 P ryor 5treet, Atlanta, Ga. T
The systemB are moisture. 'Ike perspira ti
tion, Intense itching, increased by scratch- 6
ing, very distressing, particularly at night:
s'ors as it pin-worms were crawling In and a1
about the reetum : the private parts are
sometirnes affected. If allowed to continue g
veryserious rN'lt8imay follow-'SWAk.NE'$ U
OJNTME\T is a-p~leasnt,sure-eure. Also, I
for Tetter. Itoh, Scit-Rheuma, sealed-IIca-i.,
Eryspelas, Barbere' Itch. Blotohes, all
sly, crusty Skin Dig ases. Box,.b mail,
*!)otd;S r1,5Are ,yDR. SWYNE
~ eO, Pilad, N A~lby ruggsts
DurhamssItoric. It wasneutr:luground
drrhr.the a-:istice between Sherman and
,lohnson. Soldiers of hoth arnies -11"
teirpuchiestwith thetobaccostoredtht
and, after the surrender. marched home.
wd. Soon orderaca=o from East, West,
Northatid Souxth,for "moreof that elegant
tabacco." Then, ten men ran an unknown
factory. Noiv It employs 80 men. uses the
p'nk and r.ick of the Golden Belt, and the
Dnrham Bull is' the tradc-tark of this, the
bet tobacco in the world. 1--ckwell's Bull
Durham S:uok's Tobacco has the lar;ert
r:le of any s:oking tobacco in the world.
Why! Simply because it is the best. All
de:Lers have it. Trade-mark of the Bull.
If he'd ione for a pack.
awe of Blackwell's Bull
Durham Smoking To.
bacco. as he was told, he
wouldn't have been
cornered by the bull.
irst Class, Best Quality,
ines, Liquors, Brandies,
anned G-oocds,
And ll articles ill this line.
r'ese Goor,1 are Cheap) for Cash.
you don't find TOM,
Call on BOB,
lcretoore condllCted
he businese and 1irm1 of T. C.
I 'r the niame' - I-, wa dissolve
A & T. Q. Booz, ISan.ary ]88.
the first day of . o,ducted
e bu4mess will now, it CoFriend
me a i the old stand, corner
I Pratt streets. Thankful past
ors I respectfully solicit a conti
cc of the same.
Jtn. 31-'M.
Vaiit It for 1,Q,. The A merican Agricul
st to-day is better than ever before. We
e increased our corps of Editors and
tists, enlarged and added to till our de
rtments. until the Periodical is now the
bognized leading Agricultural Journal of
world, presenting in every issuc 100 col
is of Original reading wiatter irom the
lest writur- nearly 100 Original 11
rati. - -- wic intere!t of every
whose subscription hats expired, or who
tging his place of residence, or moving
it, has for time being dropped out of
Army of Subscribers, to
Come Back
aceept of ourUn paralleled Oiler of the
For 18S4. A $1.00 P'eriodical.
1000 Illustrations.
Morris' 11xIs Superb Plate Engraving.
Dupre's 12x17 Superb rlate Engraving.
In place of the Dictionary.
LL FOR $1.70
2-ent stamps for a Sample .op'y, aind
what a wjnderful paper it is now. Ad
ANEJUDD & CG. David W. Judd, -t
~'o la-lv can get on without it.
ro (31Wc4.) Ad(cte.If
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endid Premiums fotr Getting up Clubs.
llustrated "Gold G ift." Large-Size Steel
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de of these patterns--worth more, aione,
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ETEESON's MAGAztISE is the best and
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un imense circulation and long-estab
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lied. All the most popuh.tr female writers
tibute to It. In 1881, mtone than 100
iinl stories will be given, besides SIX
I'YIRIG liT NOVE LETS-b>y Ann S. Steph
5, ary V. Spencer. Frank Lee Eenedict,
cy H[. Hooper, the author of "Josiah
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PETERSON" is the only magazine tht
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usehold, Cookery, and other receipts ;
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1 Copies for$Z.50,3 for $L.50 With a superb
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r Larger Clubs Greater Inducement!
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306 Chestnut St., Philadelphia, Pas.
WSpcmenLs sent gratis, if written for
ige .p clnha with. 4M-t f.
0, it is beautiful! lifted so
Up where the stars aro into the sky,
Out of the dark, fierce gra,4p of p:in.
Into the glorious light again.
Whence (o you bear me, ye ,lhining
o nes,
C:p illid the dazzling realns of sani
Wherefore, was I thus caught :wvy
Out of ily imother's arms to-day?
Never before, have I left her brea:4
Never been elsewhere rocked to rest;
Yet, I am wrapped in a maze of bli4s.
Tell ine what the mystery is.
Baby spirit, whose wandering eyes
Kindle ecstatic with surprise,
This is the ending of earthly breath,
This is what m->'rtals mean by death.
Far in the silence of the blue
See, where the splendor pulses thro',
Thither, released from a world of sin.
Thither, ,e come toguide thee in.
In through each seven-fold eireling
In where the white child-angels stand,
Up to the throne that thou mays't
Him who was once a child like thee.
0. ye angels of love aid light,
Stay for a moment your starry Ilight,
Stay. and adown the star-sown track,
Haste to my weeper, haste ye back!
Tell her how filled and thrilled 1 .1.11,
Tell her how wrapt in boundless calm,
Tell her I sing, I soar, I shine,
fell her the heaven of leaven; is mine.
enderest comforter, Faith's own word.
Sweeter than any her heal t hath heard,
Softly her solaced tears now fall,
Lhertb, one whisper hath told her all.
It is as much the duty of writers
to correct error as to propagate the
When an error is newly born it
is very puny and weak; but if left
alone a few years it becomes strong
enough to wield a bludgeon which
[s potent enough to batter the cred
lity of the most conscientious of
The poet has said, in effect, that
rutth would get well again if' Jeffer
son's Rock were to fall on her
ind smash her as flat as a flounder,
while Error will take cold and die
if she breaks the nail off her little
This is not true. We hav'e seen
Truth, that was as true as sunshine.
too weak to brush away a feather's
weight of opposition. and we have
seen Error, grown to be a giant,
stride up a lill, bearing on its
shoulders a whole host of its anto
A neat artifice of language some
times carries a lie . long way. A
man who is skilled in the use of
words may tell a lie which nine out
f every ten men would fail to de
tet. Sometimes it is the beauty
of the verbiage, sometimes a
shrewd trick of double entendre,
that deceives the people. IIowever
that may be, the people are dleceiv
ed and not half of them know it
and of those who do know it not
half know how it is done.
The object of this story and thiis
preface is to dispose of a fallacy.
Some writer has said 'the course
of true love never yet ran smooth."
It is false, and in all probability the
wrters own experienice proved its
falsity; but in order to know how
false it is, be pleased to hear a
John Smith and Saul .Jones were
farmer neighbors and neighborly
No one in all the county had such
fine horses as John Smith, except
Saul Jones, and no one had such
fine hogs and cows as Saul Jones,
except John Smith.
They frequently helped each
other 'out of the grass,' aided each
other at harvest or threshing time,
and were never known to have a
difference of opinion about the post
and-rail' fence which separated
their farms. Each was a man after
the other's own heart.
"They lived in pleasure without end,
For each one felt he had a friend;
And all their lives' smooth journey
Each did as 'tothier wished him to."
John Smith had a son wl:o was
named John. This was dona to
pesaerve the illianoa natrnnwic,
and transmit it furtler, as his sire
and his sire's sires had done from a
riod of time that is not nwntioned
in any of the annals of haldry.
.John Swita, -Jr., was able to g,o
to nill with grist when he was ten
years old.
IIe went to school during the win
ter months, and generally was
'next to head* in a class composed
of himself and an other boy. The
other boy was smaller than he. and
that is. perhaps, why John suffered
him to remain -head.' John stood
-head,' however. one whole week.
while the other boy was at home
sick with the measles.
John had th-; measles, mumps,
whooping cough, went swimningr on
Saturday evening, dug for chip
munks, and set traps for rabbits
and squirre!3 very much as other
boys (10 at his age.
At twenty-one years of age Le
could plow a straighter furrow and
fell a tree quicker than any other
Young man. It was said he could
cut and pile two cords of wood in
a day-or two.
"Ilis echoing axe the Cler swung -
le va4 a l:" of h'gh h- ee:
And deep the forest. boughs am1ong
lle heard 'oh, woodIman spare that
Saul Jones had a daughter, whose
name was Catharine-as her mother's
name was before her. She was
called Kitty for short. That had
been her mother's pseudonym.
The only remarkable thing about
her juvenility was that she tore her
pin-a-fores, soileA her dresses, tan
gled her hair, broke her mother's
China tea cups, wrote bad compo
sitions at school, and swung on
b,nt saplings, just as all other good
little girls do who live to be heroi
nes in 'novels' founded on fact."
Of course her eyes were blue, or
she would never have been a fit
hoerine for a love story. Her hair
was chestnut color, but somewhat
sun-bleached around the edges.
In her younger days she would run
bare-headed in the sun a great deal
consequently her face became as
reckled as the turkey eggs she
used to bring in from the edge of
the wood every evening.
As she grew older she staid in
doors a great deal more, lost her
reckles, became fair, round and
,osy, and learned to cook bacon
ind cabbage, make tarts. puffs and
mincepies, an I could manipulate a
udding. or i.iilk a cow. and her
nother was v, ry proud of her, and
leclared that Kit ty was the handiest
irl she ever saw. And always,
xihen the mnot;er had concluded her
-hapsody, Saul Jones declared that
Kitty was for all the world just like
er mother used to be.
The neighbors all loved Kitty
cery much, and more than a dozen
goung mn made eyes at her on
Suny. while they pretended to
>e listening to the sermon of Rev.
Sr. Putemasleep.
"'Roses are red(, ad viol'ts blum.
Sugar's swveet, ida Kitty too:
Oh, she was a lo v ymidh,
Ja heri pink mun- in dress airrayed.
John Smith., Jr., loved Kitty
LKitty Jones loved John Smith.
Neither had ever heard the other
ay so, therefcore neithei- was fully
iware of the <(thers feelings.
One evenin,; Kitty after she had
inished milkinig the cows. drove
:hem to thme pasture. By the merest
3hance in the world. John Smith
Jr., happened to be near to let the
bars down for her and p)ut them up
gain. John then imparted to
(itty the information that the eve
ing was v,ery fine. Kitty, proba
bly wondering how their minds ran
o naturally into the same channel.
thought it was v-ery fine also. John
aid he loved such evenings, and
though the clover blooms smelt very
sweet. These were precisely the
thoughts that were in Kitty's mind.
Both then stood a great while with
,ut saying a word-John all the
while whittling the top bar with his
ack-knife, and Kitty tying and
untying her bonnet
At last John said he had a great
mind to get mnarried, and Kitty
thought she hand a g;reat mind to do
the same thing. t!.ough she didn't
sa so. Then ,John asked Kitty if
she would marry him, and Kitty
said she would. John then walked
as far as the yard gate with Kitty.
kissed her and went home, while
Kitty went in and washed the dishes
as usual.
-Hie took 3i-~ Mani-e upon his kne.
And said, -Miss Mouse will you mal:
r-v me?"
At breakfast next morning John
Smith, J.. told his father and moth
er that lie and Kitty Jones had con
cluded to get married.
IIis father and mother both said
they would rather have Kitty for a
auhin-nlaw than any' other girl
that could be found.
The sam inorning Kitty told her
father and mother that she and John
Smith. Jr.. had conu!-:1d to get
Both of thenraaid they would
rather give Kitty to John than any
other boy that could be found.
"And all I k:iow is theY wcre cried
1In meveting.. Come1 n1:t : d .
As as the corn was all houseI
there was a wed.ling at Saul Jones.
The neighbors were all invited. and
Mrs. Jones ia.l a bigo supper. Kit
ty was dressed in white muslin, and
Johin in broad-elotn. Both seemed
to enjoy it
They went to keeling house the
next year, and are living yet as
cosily as two lady bugs in the
same rose. John works a farm,
and Kitty attends to the dairy.
"Two hanti to work upon the farm.
T%vo h:d to ml,1k tie cows.
During the high water. a man was
seen going olown the Arkansaw on a
log. As he was passing Little Rock,
several men sprang into a skiff,
rowed out to the lone navigator and
"Climb in."
".limb in whar?'
"in the skiff. hurry up."
"Wall, strangers, i'm pretty well
fixed. Don't take no work to move
"Where are you going?"
"Down the river.
.We know that. Where are you
"From up the river."
' Of course you are. but
"What made you ax, then?C"
"What are you doing on that log?"
"What do you wan' zo fool with
for? Don't you know you'll drown
if you keep ol this way?"
-Wont drown if I keep on thiser
way. Ef I wuster git off in the
water I mout drown."
"ilow far have you come this
--I've come this way all er long."
"But where were you when you
got on the log?"
"In the river."
"Certainly. but how far from
"Ain't made no calc'lation."
"Where do you live when you
are at hone?'
"At home."
-f course, but where is your
home ?"
"Whlar I live."
"Whar is your family?'
"Scattered erlong."
"D)id your house wash away?"
"Sorter. Mfy wife's back yander
on a cottonwood log, an' my son
Bsill's comhin' along som'ers on a
sho don't you come to the
"'Cause it don't cost nothing to
"You'd better come out and get
a drink."
Dinged if I don't (do it. Feller
back here wanted me to come out
an' hear him preach, but he didn't
have the right kin' o gosp)el. Now,
fellers. pull fur the shore as fas' as
v'er ken ."-MIechant-Tr'aceer
WELL. MIET.--There," she said
as she raised a window in a Pull
man car the other day; "now I can
breathe. The air in this car is sti
fiing. Why don't they hlave better
ventilation?~ If' I couldn't sit next
to an open1 windlow I beliceve I
should die."
Presently a slender fem ale sitting
directly hack leaned over and ask
ed her if she wouldn't just as lieve
close that window now, as the
draught was more than she could
"No. madam. I shall not close
this window. I could not live with
it down. I was just thinking how
delightful it was with it open, now
you want it shut. b)ut I shall not
shut it; so there."
"Then y,ou are a selfish thing,.
and I shall have to change my
.Just then a gentleman sitting
close by reached over and said :
'Ladies, that wind 2w being raised,
make no difference, as this car' has
double windows, and not a br2athl
of air can possibly get through the
one that is still down."
Then the one that had raised the.
window turned to the other, and,
with a crushed look on her face.
said : "3Madam, I beg yon pardon,
but I think two fools have met at
Dunning, when in the full flushl
of celebrity at the bar was asked
how he got through such an accum
ulation of business, IIe replied:;
"Sonme I do, some does itself, and
the est is never dnne at al."
In Forim..,r days. candidat,s foi
athission to certain churches werc
cxalmin'Ie-d as to their knowledge oJ
sunidry doctrinez. Questions whic!
no theolo,Ian could answer were
grravelv put to uneducated men, and
even to boys. On the length of hiE
reply and the frequency with whicl
lie us-d the stereotyped phrases
d in some degree, the ap
provnl which-11 the church comittee
showe i the candidate.
Among the young p)ople in a
New Engan-d villnge, who profess.
ed themselves christians, was a
simple-minded youth of the smallest
possible amount of wit consistent
with moral respousibility. But be
ing sincerely anxious to join the
churcl, he presented himself to the
church committee. The first ques
tion put to him was.
"Do you understand the doctrine
>f the trinity?"
"No, I can't say I do."
,,Can you give the committee a
lefinition of regeneration?"
"I don't think I can '
--Well. what do you understand
by foreordination? Take plenty
of time to answer," said a kind
hearted old deacon. thinking the
-andid:te was confused.
i-I don't know much about it."
-Can you give us some opinion
respecting God's decrees?'
"Fm afraid not."
"Well then," said the minister, a
little impatiently, "what do you
know?" Promptly came the answer,
.,I know that I'm a sinner, and I
know that Christ died to save me.
And I want to join the church to
get more help from Christ and His
Every member of that committee
felt rebuked, and one of them said
afterwards, "I learned from that
moment to respect the spiritual
knowledge of the humblest man or
woman. and not to think so much
r)f that knowledge which comes from
the head alone."-Youth's Compan
It may be interesting to the read
er to know the speed at which many
rlucks fly bown wind:
Mallard, from 45 to 50 miles an
Black duck, from 45 to 50 miles
Gadwall, from 60 to 70 miles an
Redhead. from 80 to 90 miles an
IBlue wingtail, from 80 to 100
miles an hour.
Green wingtail, from 80 to 100
miles an hour.
Broadbill, from 85 to 100 miles
:n hour.
Canvas back, from 85 to 120
miles an hour.
Wild geese, from 80 to 90 miles
in hour.
For the above table I am indlebted
;o M1r. ID. W. Cross, and old (luck
shooter andl a careful student of
:h habits of water fowl. I have
rot the slightest hesitancy in be.
[ieving him right, for the experi
mnce of others with whom I have
shot ducks, coupled with my own
more than corroborates the asser
~ions. When I have held ahead of
.string, of blue bills. say at least
en feet, and kill the fourth or fifth
uck in the string, I have been
trongly imp)ressed that thme speed
! ey were flying was like thc tradi
ional greased lightning, remember
ng that the charge of shot left my
un (No. 4 shot, say) with an initial
veloity of 1.800 to 2,000 feet per
sconmd. It will be seen that long
xprience2 and good judgmient is
necessary to know where to hold
~he gun in order to become a good
luck shot.
entinel system of the crows is
very complete. Their guards dis
Iay a remarkable degree of judge
'nent and intelligence. They will
irise a cry for a man with a gun long
efore be gets in range of them, and
hey are equally wary of a man who
~reeps toward them. Bat a team
ay pass close by without disturb
ng them, and they wilh even let a
man on foot pass unnoticed if he
insn't a gun and goes boldly about
is business. I had a curious ex
uple of this when I first began to
tudy their habits. I commence I
by trying to shoot them, but though
I ha~d pass them close enough be
fore, I could not get near them af ter
I began carrying a gun. I went
out with my gun every evening for
weeks. I crept behind fences and
lay in wait in the bushes, but could
never get a shot at them. One (day;
however, I struck upon a plan wbich
I have since operated very success
fully I held my gun close to my
ide. the barrel running down the
side of my leg,and walked down bold
ly down the road without taking
any notice of them. With their
usual disrcgard for trave'ere, they
let nie pass close up to them, when
I turned suddenly and fired. Now
I can shoot a crow whenever I
wat toa
Toin R. has a young brother and
a young lady sister, and Tom R. is
a hard one to keep up with. His
sister had a beau the other night,
and just as the conversation be
caie interesting the little brother
walked in.
-Well,' said his sister, 'what do
you want here ?'
I want to whisper something to
you.' was the reply.
iTisn't polite to whisper in coin
paiy, speak out like a little man.
-Oh, I don't like to.'
iYes, but you must, so Mr. J. can
see how bright you are.'
'All right then. Brother Tom
told me to ask you what was the
date of your last bustle, for he can't
find to-days paper high or low, and
he left it in your room just before
Tom left on the midnight train
for a trip South, and his house is
not expecting him back before the
first of May. The young lady may
recover by that time.-The Press
There was once an old monk
who was walking through a forest
with a little scholar by his side.
The old man suddenly stopped and
pointed to four plants close at hand
The first was just beginning to peep
above the ground; the second had
rooted itself pretty well into the
earth: the third was a smart shrub;
whilst the fourth and last was a
full-sized tree. Then the old monk
said t) his younger companion:
-'Pull up the first."
The boy easily pulled it up with
-'Now, pull up the second."
The youth obeyed, but not so
"And the third.'
"But the boy hal to put forth
all his strength and use both arms
before he succeeded in uprooting it
'-And now said the master, "try
your hand upon the fourth."
But lo! the trunk of the tall tree
grasped in the arms of the youth,
scarcely shook its leaves; and the
little fellow found it impossible to
tear its roots from the earth. Then
the wise old monk explained to his
scholar the meaning of the four
--This, my son, is just what hap
pens with our passions. When
they are very young and weak, one
may by a little watchfulness over
self, and the help of a little self
denial, easily tear them up; but if
we let them cast their roots deep
down into our souls, then no human
power can uproot them-the almigh
ty hand of the Creator alone can
pluck them out. For this reason,
my child, watch well over the first
movements of your soul, and study
by acts of virtuc to keep your pas
sions in check."
SUCCESSI-TUL LoVE.-There are men
who rise from a low station to a
throne; and it certainly must be a
grand and triumphant sensation
which they experience when first
they sit in the seat of sovereignty,
and feel their brows pressed by the
golden circlet of command, witE
the gmeat objects of ambition all
attained, the struggle up the ascent
to power accomplished and the end
reached for which they.have fought,
and labored, and watch through
many a weary day and night. But
the exultation of that moment, great
as it may be, is nothing to that
which fills the heart of youth in the
first moment of successful love.
The new-throned usurper must be
well-nigh weary of repeated
triumphs; for the step to the throne
is but the last of many fatiguing
footfalls in the path of ambition.
iIe, too, must foresee innumerable
dangers and difficulties around; for
the experience of the past must
teach him that in his race there is
no goal, that the prize is never
really won, that he may have dis
tanced all others, but that he must
still run on. Not so with the lover
in the early hour of his success;
his is the first step in the coarse of
joy, andl the brightest because the
Fresh fr-om all the dreams of youth,
it is to him the sweetest of realities;
unwearied with the bitter task of
experence, he has the capability of
enjoyment as well as the expectation
of repose. The brightne-s of the
present spreads a veil of misty
light over all that is threatening in
the futura; and the well of sweet
Iwaters in the heart seems inex
Wn.TAr KEPT UIx.-"Hello, Bill,
when tiid you get back!" asked
one i-ough citizen of acother, down
on the levee.
"D)ay b'efore yistiddy."
-W here yer been"
'-Up here in a country town."
'What doin'"
"W orkin' on the streets. '
"Gittin' any lucre!"
'C%othin' but my board."
'No mnor'n that?'
"Not a nickel."
"Well you're gittin' party low
down. What kept you so long!"
*"A fifty pound ball chained to
my northwest leg, that's all."
M h TMrawiter
Advertisements insertcd at the rate of
$1.00 per square (one inch) for first insertior,
and 75 cents for each subsequent insertioz.
Double column advertisements ten per cen*,
on above.
Notices of meetings, obituaries and tributt s
of respect, same rates per square as ordinmiy
Special Notices in Local column 15 cer.t
Advertisements not marked with the unn
her of insertions will be kept in till forbid
and charged accordingly.
Special contracts made with lare adver
ti iers. withI liberal deductions on above rate s
certain bachelor in town who has a
good business of his own, concluded
he wanted to extend it somewhat
and found that a partner with capi
tal would help affairs, so he put the
matter before a banker on Third
--Ah," said that gentleman, eye.
ing him suspiciously, -so you want
a partner, do you?"
"I think it would be advisable."
--It would, my fine fellow, it
would," chuckled the banker.
nudging him in the ribs, --and the
very partner you want is a wife."
"W hat?"
"A wife; ha-ha-ha !" and the
banker shook till the greenbaiks
in his pocket jingled.
"A wife? Well it might to tin
der some circumstances, but, you
see, I want a silent partner."
"How tall would you think I was?"
asked Crimsonbeak of some friends,
as they stood chatting on the street
the other night.
"Oh. about five feet se- a inches,"
guessed one.
"Not right," replied the beacon
light; ".I stand five feet nine inches
in my boots.'
'-You don't do anything of the
kind !" came from a voice on the
outside of the circle.
"What's the reason I don't !' ex
claimed Crimsonbeak, moving to
ward the spot with a bad look in
his face.
--Because you don't stand in your
boots at all," replied the little man
who Crimsonbeak recognized as his
shoemaker; "and the sooner you
come around and pay me for them
the better !"
Crimsonbeak's previous engage
ments demanded his immediate at
tention elsewhere at that moment.
Yonkers Statesn.
inent business firm in one of our
leadirg cities, who has grown rich
by liberally patronizing the printer
gives to their fellow merchant the
following concerning adv-ertising:
'-We have for many years studied
the art of advertising, and still
it remains a marvel to us that there
is not a hundred times more of it.
WVe never knew a man to advertise
his wares liberally and steadily that
it did not pay. Yet there are
thousands of manufactures and tens
of thousands of men, having articles
which they declare ought to be 'in
every household 'n the country,'
who advertise a gingerly and close
ly as thoui! they had at heart no
faith ini it. at all. How can they
e'pect to get their goods anywhere
unless some knowledge of the arti
c!e first gets into the family hews
paper? If we wited tilt people
learn from their neighbors, we
might wait for years before the
most wonderful and useful inven
tion bcame known."
H A ND A ND HEAD -It has been
the fashion to separate handwork
from headwork, is if the two were
incompatible. One was for laborers
and mechanics, the other for pro
fessional and literary peoe; one
was for the poor, the other for the
rich. But we are gradually learn
ing that their harmonious union is
ihe only means of the perfection of
eithei-. Ruskin says truly: "We
want one man to be always think
ing, and another to be always work
ing, and we call one a gentleman
and the other an operatilr ; whe.
as the workman ought often to b
thinking and the thinker often to
be working, and both shoald be
gentlemen in the best sense. The
mass of society is made up of mor
hid thinkers and miserable work
ers. It is only by labor that thought
can be made healthy, and only by
thooght that labor can be made
happy. and the two cannot be sep
arated with impunity."
I t takes 850 turns of the crank
to wind the clock in Trinity steeple,
New York.
Timne is what we want most, but
what we use worst, for which we
must all account, when time shall
be no more.
In the morning think what you
have to do, for which ask God's
blessing ; at night, what you must
ask God's pardon.
Religion is reproached with not
being progressive; but it makee
amends by being imperi shiable.
Experience shows that success is
due less to ablility than to zeal.
Tbe winner is he who gives himself
to his work, body and.eouL.
True politeness .ast touch
of a noble'chara "Jt Ii the
g old on the spise, the sulight on
the cornfield."
We should advocate no theory
wbieh we believe to be fala

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