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1 I .A:'. , J, W.HODGHTOI, M. H. HODGHTOH, Idllars. OD TO TSS CUCUMBE&. Oool, orjrpr, Trdin t. lnsolou frni t, . Though ocourc with wittlivM stripes T Tor rove thou need not press thy salt, Thoa boldest as with gripes. What time thon'rt In the marjcet plane, . A doaen for s nickel. A v "' or j to -rortttauoa truit with MmpuiH iaoo ;r Li FnrtiMdia fruit with temntlnar fane n OcJytnjr near the garden path. Some simple lad, in frolic. Purloins thee, brinzlna; down the wrath Of oonecienoe ana 01, colic v r" , i- - -v , . J! r Or siloed tn-"vtnegar Infanta, ! J ; , vT " -" Thoa msket all food sweeter. '' i Cans doubling np the toys of taste. And doubling up the eater. Child of the dew. from Asia's clime. trcspeptfc may deride us, - - 1 f-"7Werll not expose air in trar rtjiMi r J Vi Thy wronKS are,ll Inside iiC . ?H A vengeance gastronomic : i . Thine : unlike a crime that weighs ths heart, :" Lies aeary oo the stomach. 0. v 1 c'' Thy slain are' scattered o'er' the earth! ' -Pnissaatof the kn-klox camber; : T v; Thy form, with praise of vanished worth, - ... inould mack their place of. siqjnber. And shall we rear this fruit again. And of It be partaker?, . , -j -, We taste, and answer To. or pain, J Tee, were put I .DXSCOBD. V Slrack ! ye . wpnlda t , wear , that . " thing, would ye now, Delphy K " 1 Tow to wear it fast chainjoe 1 git,'- Ephraim Picklea." The little wisp of a y woman in a short tight "dress ahd ' Big I blue apron looked very determined.- a s ah held by the collar a polonaise of .the ; most . flaming scarlet imaginable,' knd ' enrreyed it through her spectacles. Her v . ,' tall, awkward husband, iust in from the ' " fieldr-euireyed it, 6oo,wiih his head half i 'on one side and his eres half shut. --The ' old Brahma rooster going by the door. a ana eviaenuy aitraciea oy mo yiviu rt mlnrwitJlin. stnnrwuf tA insnefit it, too r lumping upon mo step no put i , JUS ussu UJU UWl , nulling ', side to side, then threw it back, opened lis mouth as wide as possible, as if in- dulging 'in a spasm of laughter, and . sent forth a loud, hoarse crow. , - r : "The O-yapten's a-laughlri'-at ye," : , said Ephraim, as he picked op his pan. of , pump tin.' seea. ana.stanea to uie neiu. WioA wmilil il: :hnTA.kmn far the Clo.' " t , tain to follow, instead of standing stock ' still,' a mark 'for the "arrows of Mrs. .'i-vll ! Pickles's Wrath.' ' She seized the broom i j and brandished it vigoToaslyi1:! .3-; ;n 'I'. -Yoa. jiat tote yourself off,- -yoa " ole Tarmint," she cried, "standin' an' crowin' there like a"oie "possuui. "The' ' t Captain, still standing in innocent won- der, . exasperated her Into hurling the ; broom toward himwhereat he sprang Tt- three feet : straight np into the air with -4 an astonished " Qa-aw-kt" vvthen marohed vtf around thflC cornet.- The polonaise had been sent to Mrs. , , , Fickles by a sister in the eity. whohe taste in dress ran to brilliance of oolor- - lug, in part par for the rolls of butter ' supplied by Mrs. Pickles, Who had sent ' . ' for the polonaise - with a rapae order to , r get soniething "kinder styiish. an,'. tak- ln'-UKe."' &ne snarea ner sister's taste 'for bright colors in a more moderate de eree. and. thonzh she might not ham - j if selected such a very striking article her self, now that she had it she was loath to hide its gorgeousness from the light :.-'.'! of day ana the aamiraaon or bteepie wille eyes. -' . : -;; .-. ' . Probably the Captain had forgotten '" " " all about the polonaise, the broom and his own misdeed as he reveled in '-his - - J-'- sun. But EphrsimPickies, teisurely patting the tops of the pumpkin hills smooth wiin tne Diaae oi me noe, anew ,-r.v- bv the ehrUl and vieioTK tone of the tin y dinner-horn that Delphy had ot forgot ten the slights put that morning upon her scarlet polonaise. .. . But the bone of contention had not yet reached the acme oi its reputation. v - - - - The bells of the little villasre church .. i.'- v "---'were ringing the next morning for Sabbath-school when Ephraim put his head in at the bed-room door where his wife was struggling with a mighty hair braid,. which perversely rerusea to oe arrangea in orderly fashion, bat with an utter dis regard for propriety bristled up in a jauntilv defiant manner, and kept slip ping backward and forward and &Jde- wavs with everv motion oi ueipnys lm- N . patient neaa. . ,'" ' ' "Air ye a-eoin' to wear that red thin?. DelDhvP" asked Eohraim. "Yes, I air," answered, his wife, pos itively, gouging a big hairpin into the remcsory oratu, anu piooiog n. ixuh. in a state of hilarious one-sidedness. " Then I ain't a-eoin with ye," said Ephraim, with his. usual deliberate slow-ness.- ''--'- 1J, ! "I kin go alone, I reckon," said Del v -y. , , -, pny, ner necav. loosing suaaemy very ' " " strafeht and her nose very stiff." "folks H take ye ier a big walkin " - ! ; hoUyhock' said Ephraim, as he shut the '"-'' ; door." Never an idea of flinchinsr from - her purpose had Mrs. Pickles,' as she buttoned, ' on the red polonaise with stftadv fincrera.' But as she stepped out on the little buff portioo as the bells. ,were beginning to nng lor cnurcn, ana no Ephraim was to be seen, the thought that he really meant to let her go alone was a thorn' that' rankled sorely in her heart. "An' we aint hed nary furss r '. far so long not since the time his steers . tramped up my piney-bed," she mur mured, as she carefully concealed the door-key in ita small - hiding-place, i 1 i ': clump of crass pinks in, the border. "3 - J , 1 ji , - - , k , I' - - . . reriuui uio duiuukuw woa luuua su- mired by the church members, but Ephraim spoiled Delphy's satisfaction ' " "effectually by casting half-amused, half Sheepish elances at. it from .across the ; f h aisle daring the whole servioe, and fur v - ther, bv lingering after meeting to 'talk to the deacons until his wile was saieiy out of sight.- i Dinner was attended that day with a , orispness and shortness that belonged . ' - : ' ' not to the pie-crust, and an acidity rival- ..I ..i.injr that of the pickled cucumbers. The Bev. Mr. Goodman's excellent sermon was not pondered over 'with usual in terest; ana. in the May ausK .fc.pn.raim smooked his pipe on the Ion? back porch. while Delphy. rocked in her split-hot-, u i c. 1 1 tomed ohair in the front portico. And still the apple of disoord tri umphed. . . . The ladies of Steepl ill were getting up a fancy fair for the benefit of the church, ana as the time drew near for the grand display the scarlet polonaise, that had lain in the I - , J VU- - '.y.UnMSm M . . )(. ... pureau urawcr. u&o Biwiucuug mo, " ' ""ready to flame np and kindle ' anew the - -fire of contention, was again, discussed. " Te won't wear it this time, now will - ye,' honeyr asked Ephraim, as he I. ' watched the completion of an apple pie ""'" " under Delphy's nimble fingers. -;" Yes, I will," Baid Delphy, "I'd.hev ," to ef I didn't want to. I ain't got nothin' . else." . . . " - . : "Shucks!" " said Ephraim,. with a pozziea look that cleared at a suaaen ' Idea, "ve could make somethintr." "Ioouldnt no tick," said Delphy, ' - - " hanging up her rolling pin. "I aint - got time to wink.. An' here's Sallie "'."".' sen'in' fer me to come an' tell her what's the matter with the baby says he takes spells of squallin', hiiself black an ,r-.Z ' skeerin' her an' Johnny till their hair . . Stan's on eend. I'll her to gr over to , morrer.thoueh I don't reckon it's nothin' ., more'n nettlerash. I oouldnt take nary stitch twixt this an' the festible f I ' wanted to.!.' I, . J; 'ii"Dont ye low. Miss. Jinnins could make ye a pouy what ye can itr" "Mussy! She's got so much sewin , on hand she wouldn't make as much as a. niffht-cap not for nobody. makin' : . :w - " Hum KOtonWilla irrrl." Derphy's enorgetio "voice soared up s shrill pipe at this climax. . i w. We-eU," spoke , Ephraim, slowly,, "wouldn't nary one- of the neighbors, make ye one not a nightcap, a poUy whatever Us?" "My sakes! what an idytiaid Del phy : ."they're every one as busy as the! kin be an' busier too a-eewin f er the f estible, an' would make me nolhin let alone I aia't got nothin' to make an don't want it no way, 'cause I 'low to wear' the red polonaise; an' Eph, it's jest naturally meanness in yoa : not a wantin' jne to wear it." - ! ; Eph i walked out of ths kjtohen rubbing nis eyeDniwmeaiiairveiy-j. if " P'raps It's weekid." h5 said, 'but I kaint help a-hatin' that red polly. shucks i l xaint never rememner me rest of it." Toward the blose- oi the. next after noon,' Mrs. Pickles "re turned from her' daughter's home. "I knowed." she muttered as she neared her own doer, "wasn't nothin' thsTsnatter with that little limb only bad ness.!" She. had: come the nacK way througbrike OTohard." The sitting-room window was open, ana rrom witmn sne heard . .the . smomerea exclamation "Shucks!"' . , What kin Eph be about f" she won dered.11 She took off her sunbonnet, tip toed to the window, and pTvoa over the siQvEven then she fr t"" Imme diately discover whiwEpa was about. There ha. waron the Booroir his hands and. knees.- looking- Ut-tom xina oz aueer, gigantio bug, his face expressing the -most exaggerated - perplexity.- ' A large piece of calico, half unrolled, was spread before him, and beside it lay the sheep-shears and' an old polonaise of Detphy'a,-Ep&'. glaring at them all in puzzled despair. At-Iength he picked, up the polonaise 'and afterv eyeing all the seams intently, laid it upon the . cal ico, and can tiously took up the shears, but paused iireaofutely, scratching his nose with the points.' .)"- i -' " Ef I knowed how In common sense this here mess of -gathers an' wrinkles was out, I could do it," he soliloquized. "I'd eive a pretty to know Whether they cut 'em tut, or sew 'em into the calico an' then cut 'em,". Jtie lata aown me shears and settled into his former posi tion, still survevinir the calico as if to find a solution of the mystery therein. As for Delphy. outside, she sat down upon an old flower-pot, wiping her sud denly tearful eyes upon the cape of her bonnet, . . r , , . , i Bless him. said she. "hA's a-trVins to cat me a polonaise, his own self t - Hi -Mint, a-cuttin me a polonaise I he's went an' bousrht the stuff, too, an" me A-treatia' him like a dog. Lord forgive my weekiacess, an' I won't never ao it strain:- An the Lord bless him. A-tryin' to cut me a polonaise I That beats me r an' with the sheep-shears i" Alter an oler burst of tears Delphy jumped np and ran in. Eoh!" she cried, "honey, you kaint never cut it. Let it alone, an' I'll ' fin' the; time somehow. . -An' . I wont neer wear the red thing vnor nothin yonv don't 'rant ' me to,- the long est day I live. , Oh, Eph, my sngar love, to tmnsc yoa was a-tryin' to cut me a -. polonaise with ' .the . sheep-shears ! " And she ran into Eph's arms, he having risen to his feet, and cried against his butternut coat. . '. ." Yon -needn't to cry, ' honey," said Eph; patting her head. "I didn't cat it, so it aint spiled, nor the sheep-shears ain't, neither. . . But,'. Delphy, chile" and the twinkle of humor m his eyes changed to a kindly; serious look, "I've been kinder thinkin' mavbe the Lord wouldn't like fer us to be rjuarSra so- over nothin' at our time of life, 'sua of doin' what we could for His glory." j " We won't do it no more,'; said DeK phy. . -j Ana the nextday she cut up the red polonaise to make twelve pincushions for the- fancy fair (and thus it was no longer a bone of dUcord. but a blesinsr in disguise) into a dozen things of beau ty, ana prooaoiy joys torever until moths and time shall take away their glory. DemoresVt Monthly. Hew the Docters Went U Washington. The ride of the two consulting: physi cians- to Washington must go into history as one oi me most remarKaoie on reoora. Orv Vrnk H Hamilton received the dis patch summoning him to Washington at his house. No 43 West Thirty-second Street, ew York. It took him only ten minutes to prepare for the journey. He left the house at about two o'clock. with the remark that he did not know when the next train would start, but that he would get a carnage and go to the ferry, so that he would be ready to take it. The dispatch, which was brief, he took with him. He hastened in a carriage to the Desbrosses Street ferry, where he learned that the first train for Washington was over the Pennsylvania Railroad at S :40 o'clock. It would ar rive in Washington at 10.: 20 p. m. Some time was spent in inquiries as to the de parture oi trains on other roacu. Then he crossed the ferry, and entered the Jersey City passenger waiting-ropra. where he was reoogmsea while he was making u'duiries at the palace-car win dow. .Superintendent Jackson, who was in his office in another part or me depot, was sent for. , A very brief time sufficed to make him aware of the situation. He hurried away from Dr. Hamilton, and seven minutes later the latter was rush ing out of the depot on a special train. It was 3 :10 p. m. when the depot mas ter and the train dispatcher received no tice to be spry, i-ngine aio, one of the best of the ordinary engines, with a five foot driving wheel, was hitched to a new Eastlake coach, a."t at 8:20 it was run out of the depot. . -The freight trains were all got out of the way one after another on sidetracks in time to allow the special to roar past them, without slacking speed, but two passenger trains delayed the Doctor fif teeA. minutes. He wrived -at Philadel phia at 6 o'clock, a distance of ninety miles in one hundred minutes'. The en gineer was A. Vandegrif t, and the con ductor H. W: Headier. At Philadelphia a stop oi due a iew minutes was maaat in which to change engines and allow Dr. Agnew to get on the cars. From Philadelphia to Wilmington, with a stop at Chester and other places, the run was made in twenty-seven minutes, the dis tance being twenty-six miles. A dispatch had been sent to Wilmington for a brakeman, and a man "wrned Hum phreys was detailed to "maSSa train." At, 6:27. the special v came dashing through the city at the rate of, at least, eighteen miles an hour, and the intrepid brakeman stood nearthe track. He made a desperate grab for the rear platform, and at the risk of his life succeeded in gaining a hand and foothold. The car steps-were protected by a wire railing.and he was carried a considerable distance clinging on to this before the conductor came back and unlocked the gate. The train arrived at Washington at 7 :50 p. tu: an average rua from New York of almost fifty miles- ao hour,' and from Philadelphia of over fifty-five miles an hour. This is the fastest railroad time, for the distance .and considering the stops, on record. Bollimort Gazette, s. Experiments have been made with compressed gunpowder, made to fit the drill-holes, and cut into short lengths. IUWas'.foond to possess many advan tages over loose' powder, among which is a saving of forty per cent, in powder. In the vicinity of Big Hole, M. T the bears unearthed a large number of Indian skeletons, and have strewn the ground with bones. It is probably the scene of an old battle-field. - .'V.iX ' V ' ' IJ: " ' When a man's money is gone bis friends drop off like buttons from a pair 01 ready-Tnade-panta Bottom Globe. - - The Twe braves' In PekerTaUej. ' "It was the enrlousest thimr tniaterer happened in the diggtas," said the old man, as ne siowiy nuea his pipe: "jigh onto twenty years ' ago was about the date, an a hundred or so of na. miners had squatted in Poker Valley. It wasnt much oi a vauey, an' mar wasnt any too much poker, an' I know I pat in six months o hard work in that 'ere hole an' didnt cl'ar fifty cents a day. Howsumever, that halnt nuthin' to do with the story I sot out to tell, though it serves to explain why we were all out o' temper one arternoon, when a -stranger enterea rorer vauey Dy tne west trau an' ' brought ' his skinny an foot-sore mole to a nalt in the center of our town. It war airly in the fall, an the weather was downright mean. ' It had bin drix- ziin ail day long, an we had cnssea an' salked an loafed around till every man was ready to answer a word with a WOW. -- -: --' -" ! ,.. - ""The mintt that stranger rode up we all rushed ont to' see who he was an' what he wanted.' 1 He was a light-weight chap, muffled np to the ears to keep dry, and we couldn't say what he - oould do with a pick-ax or how ' he'd back a friend in a fight. . He didnt offer to git down from his mule, but began to ln quar' arter a : chap 1 whom' we - called Sweet 'William, This William was a candy sort ' man.' He seemed a bit pious, kad a soft voice, never cussed nor d rank whisky, an we didnt aactly mate with him. Ten days afore this stranger rode np Sweet William got out o his blankets at midnight either asleep or in trouble, an' the poor ease took: a walk over a bit o cliff about : fifty feet high. with a lot o. jagged rooks-to light on down below. VY e didn't take on very much, as he had no partner an' wasn't one q us, as I meashuned before, but we gin him a decent burial an' sold his traps on the squar to the highest bid der. . . .. "Waalj-nowrthot stranger was goin on to ax about William, an' I was a-eay- In'. to.aysil that ha had the softest voice oi any man in the aiggins, wnen sunthin happened. Ole Kentucky Bill an' Deacon Joe bad bin growlin' at each other for an hour or so, kinder achin fur a row, an' at length they went at it. Ole Kentuck gin Joe a lifter on the law,' an' Joe he out with his popper an fired Kentuck to kingdom come. No, he didn't,' ' either. The bullet out away a lock of hair and did its bloody work beyond.;; The stranger on the mule got it plump thro' the heart, and he was dead afore he fell into my arms.' He! No, stranger 'twas a woman! Snre's you're - born, it was a woman not over twenty-five years old, and with a face as purty as a thousand-dollar nugget. She was dressed sort o' man fashion, an' she was ibravin' Injuns, b'ars. storms, and everythingelse fur an objeck. What was itF Waal, I dunno. Was Sweet William her lover or her husband t Had he run away from her, or had he cum thar to make a stake? . Must have bin some powerful motive to have sent that gal on sioh a trip, an' we talked it over an' kinder eonoluded it was love, an nuthin else. " 'Twas a terrible deal, anyhow, an' I never think of it without ieelin my heart grew big and my throat choke np. When we diskivered that she was s woman we sot around thar like pegs for about half an hour. Then we ris up an kicked them two fighters outer camp and dug a grave 'longside o Sweet Wil liam's fur tne poor dead gal, an' they sleep thar to this day Bough and cussed- as we war in Poker Valley, we had tears in our eyes as we put that , poor gal away an'. I seed more'n one old grizzly drop his chin when the Ala bama elder . stood at the head of the graves an' said : A The Lord gave and the' Lord hath taken away. May they be jined togeth er W hearen. DetroH .(Yte Press. ; A Railway President's Private Car.-.,. . The following is sv description of the new private car just completed at AL toona, Pa.4 for President MoKeen, of the Yandaliar . - The interior is finished with ash, var nished and rubbed down tin til theglittei of the varnish is lost in the ' plain color of the hard woodv .This finish gives the "Walla and roof and furniture everything in ash a very tidy appearance. Noth ing could look cleaner. The parlor, in the rear end, contains six arm-chairs, a secretary and an extension table. . The next room, a sleeping and dining-room, contains eight berths. The lower seat' ran lengthwise, making sitting accom modations for each tide of the table. Going forward, next in order, and very conveniently bunched, are ths heater, a closet, wash-stand and linen closet. Over these, supported by the various parti tions ronna ana snout tnem, is a sixty gallon roof tank for water. The tank is outofsight. Its existence would not be surmised, except by Inquiry as to where the water came from. Next, on the right, is a private bed-room, with wash- stana ana closet, ana bed across the oar. From the bed and from the parlor, by means of a cord, the occupant of the car may put on ths air-brakes and stop the train. From two places in this room, and from eight other places in the car. electrio signals communicate with the kitchen in front. The kitchen is sup plied with a ship stove and sheet-iron compartment up the pipe for keeping food warm, with a coal-box, sink, draw ers, cupboard, ice-chest, and upper berth for a porter. An extra mattress, to be laid on the ice-chest, makes sleep ing" TOom1 for "an extra porter. The lamps and heaters are the same that are found in Pullman cars On a Western Konntain. It is difficult to lay down laws of gen eral application eroverninff altitude and atmosphere in this elevated region. To walk up-hill is exhausting; to sing, ao surd and Impossible. Yet the "burros," or tiny Mexican donkeys, are stimulated to prolonged vocal exercises unknown in lpwer regions, and make night hide ous with their late concerts outside the tents. In the absence of dogs, which do not thrive at this altitude, they per form the part of camp-scavengers, de vouring every waste article, ironi dilap idated clothirur to creasy newspapers. Otherwise we should be r visited by a pestilence ; lor, tnougn "every prospect pleases," the prospector is certainly "vile." The effect of . the altitude is directly felt noon prices, which are ex orbitantly high ; while the rarity of the 'atmosphere is shared by purses, which become singularly light. In this place of suspension between heaven and earth. Watches, too, seem to vibrate between time and eternity, and become badly demoralized -' in their effort - to follow both. Occasionally we receive the time from Gunnison City by telegraph.1 What remains alter loss by me way is then distributed, to serve till exhausted, when a new supply is obtained in the same way as before, .bastern etiquette and formality ' are of necessity dispensed with, and to a great degree Eastern costume shares their ' fate. ' Flannel shirts, duck coats, corduroy breeches. broad-brimmed bats, and the tallest of top boots jorm .me - prevailing attire. When a gentleman wishes to entertain his friends in more than usual social style, he invites them, not to a "dress coat," but to a "bouea shirt party." unnuxn Utter to spring fteia (Max.) t i. . ; v. The marriage of the Princess Vic toria of Baden to the heir-apparent of Sweden and Norway will take place on the same day as ' the silver 'wedding of ner parents, September zu. John Morden, a Canadian farmer's boy, self-taught in the art of taxidermy. has a collection of . i.auo biros stuned and mounted by himself.-- -" SCIENCE AH D IXDU8TRT.' ". ; Henceforth the telegraph Offices of France are to record in detail all thun der-storms which may be observed. " The ' London Sanitary company is formed for the purpose of putting dwell ing and other houses in perfect sanitary condition.. The evil effect of the electrio light upon the eyes is due, it is supposed, to the constant changes in the intensity of the light, whereby the eyes are greatly fatigued. - ' It has been computed that the power of the steam engines in England would suffice to raise from the quarries and place in position all the Great Pyramid In eighteen hours. , Asphalte is considered by M. Leon Malo as chalk strongly impregnated with bitumen. It was first : applied to road making in 1849 by M. Merian, a Swiss engineer. . In 1851 it was first tried in Paris, in the Rua Bergere.- : , ' In a recent Work'on the nests and eggs of birds. Dr. W. - von Reichenan states that the Ornamental plumage, crests, etc., of the male bird are due to an excess of energy, while the vitality ot the female is exhausted by the produc tion of eggs and the task of incubation. A Quantity of ' paper pulp made oi sawdust is to be sent from Canada to England, where the question of its value will be -determined. . The pulp will : be maae into paper in an r,ngusn factory, and experiments will be made as to the uses to which it may be put.' '. Capital ists in the lumber region of the Domin ion are awaiting the result with consid erable interest. t , English wool is subiected to a puri fying process in a heated room during six. months before it is used, whereby the "eke," or grease and dirt, is taken out of it. American wool just fleeced from the sheep's back, is worked up. ana, as the eke is suit in it, it win not take the colors. The imperfect dyeing of American cloths results in rapid fad ing, while the English lasts. Dr. Barety, of Nice, has successfully employed turpentine vapor in the treat ment of whooping-cough. The drug is allowed to stand In plates in the room occupied by the patient, a resort to which simple expedient is believed to greatly lessen the severity and duration of the malady. . Dr. Barety. was led to a trial of this ; remedy by observing a marked improvement in the case of a child severely affected who had been allowed, to sleep in a . newly-painted room, redolent with the turpentine odor. It may not, perhaps, be known that a man wearing dark clothes is more lia ble to infection from contagious disease than he who . wears light-coiorea gar ments, because particles which emanate from diseased or decaying bodies are much more readily absorbed by dark than by light fabrics. .. This is easy of proof. - Expose a light and dark coat to tne iumes oi tobacco lor nve minutes and it will be found that the dark one smells stronger than the other of tobacco smoke, and it will retain the odor longer. NTH A5D P0IST. If wit is badinage, what must it be in youth P Cambridge Tribune. The idea that nothing harder than diamonds could be made has been ex ploded, a St. Louis bride having baked a oaten oi biscuits. JJoston rou. When a city man moves into the su borns and gets a patch of ground big enough to raise a turnip on, bis nrst am bition is to join a farmers' club. Phil adelphia Hews. - - The tramp finds he can buy two glasses of beer with the money he has begged for a single cup of coffee, and that is why he always asks for coffee money. iveto vrieans lcayune. ', A chicken when stripped of its plumage is said to . be 'dressed. The girls of the ballet resemble the chicken in this regard, though they are not all chickens in years. Boston iranscrxpl. ' : " Tommy, did you hear your mother call you?" "Corse I did!" "Then why don't yon go to her at once?" "Well, yer see she's nervous, and it'd shock ner awful 'fi should co too sudden t." Yonicers Gazette. - .-- A colored couple, elegantly dressed, and-in the bloom of youth, were passing up Austin Avenue, when the man was heard to say: "Miss hiatuay. Johnsinr, does yer transpire like I aoesr" "iieck- so I sweats like a hog." Texas Sift ing. .. . . ' . When a Montana gentleman puts on a pair of long boots, a slouch hat, a pint oi wni8xy and two long, large-sized revolvers and a knife that can reach clear through a cow, he is said to be 'dressed to Kin. " . Ana Indeed be is, thouoh - too cant - alwava he certain whether he or the other man will be killed Burlington Hawkey e. . ' ODSTO PB WinOCILLTOS, ' ' Oblonsr and lnscioas Black seeds or white; Tuemme devour yoa Outer my sight. ( . Mottled or speckled, Tuick rind or thin ; " Devnid of all eramps, - Oolie an.' sin. Georgia or Jarsey, - Speckled or spotted ; Done who doan' like 'em. Orter be shotted. ' - Detroit F)rt$ Prtts. L Petition to the Csar. ' The following telegram was sent from Sofia to the Emperor of Russia one day after the arrest of the Liberal leaders : ." Your Majesty t Graciously forgive as for addressing yon by telegram. The gravity of the moment compels us to do so. The time is short; the knife is at our throats. If yon do not -withhold it we are lost. Do not allow them to de prive us of the liberty conferred on us by your august parent,' the Csar Eman cipator, we are already nan slaves. Yesterday the four best patriots of our country were deprived of their liberty in an illegal manner. Yoa fought per sonally for us. Could yoa bear to ns again slaves r uur best men have been libeled. We refute this libel. Your Majesty, these words are our own. JNobody is telling us what to say we are prompiea Dy our own nearts. lie lieve us, our minds are not obscured. For five hundred years we were slaves. Your august parent wrested our liberty for ns by force of arms. The liberty that he conferred noon ns we will prize as our uves. we oeseecn you to com mand that our patriots be liberated, Give but one order that your subject should not aid in trampling on our na tional rights given us by your august Jtarent. Without the aui of your sub sets no one will make us slaves. Our priceless national privilege free elec tion is being trampled under foot. The election of representatives who will renounce liberty can not be in accord- ance wiin me wisnea oi tne people." A Chicken Bans Away with a Lady's linger. Last Tuesday a curious accident hap pened to Mrs. 8. K. Smith at the Sisters', or St. Vincent's I arm, near .Laclede. She was at the barn with her little child when by some means a garden hoe which had been lately sharpened and was hanging on a peg in the wall, be came disioaged ana was about to fall on the child ; Mrs. Smith, seeing the danger, warded off the hoe, which struck her on the forefinger of the right hand, completely severing it at the first joint. The dismembered portion, fallin? to the ground, was at once picked up by a chicken, and both chicken and finger end were soon out of sight. The finger nas not oeen reooverea. tit. lauiM ii loot-Democrat. v " Bescued from Death. The following statement of William J. Coughllne, of Somrville, Ma s., is so remarkable that we beg to ask for it the attension of our readers. ' He says : "In the fall of 1876 I was taken with a vio lent bleeding of the lungs followed by a severe cough. I soon began to lose my appetite and fleab. I was so weak at one time that I could not leave my bed. in the summer or 1877 I was admitted to the City Hospital. While there the doctors said I bad a hole In my left lung as big as a half dollar. I expended a hundred dollars in doctors and medi cines. I was so far gone at one times report went around that I was dead, : 1 gave up hope, but a friend told me. of Dr. Wm. Hall's Balsam for the Lungs. I laughed at my friends, thinking that my case was incurable, bnt I got a bot tle to satisfy them, when to my sur pslse and gratification, I commenced to feel better. My hope, once dead, began to revive, and to-day I feel better spirit ed thau I have the past three years. "I write this hoping you will publish it, so that every one afflicted with Di seased Lungs will be induced to take Dr. Wm. Ball's Balsam for the Lungs, and be convinced that Consumption can be Cured, I have taken two bottles and can positively say that it has done more good than ail the other medicines I hsve taken since my sickness.- My cough has almost entirely disappeared and I shall soon be able to go to work. For sale by li. u. Starr jo. 24-iy 1 Health and Happiness. , -It seems strange that anyone will suf fer many derangements brought on by an impure condition of the blood, when Scoville's Blood and Liver syrup will restore perfect health to the physical organization. It is Indeed a s lengthen ing syrup, pleasant to . take, and has Srove n itself to he the best blood purl er ever discovered, effectually curing Scrofula, Syphilitic disorders, Weakness of -the Kidneys, all nervous disorders and Debility. ' -It corrects Indigestion. It makes the old feel young, and the young feel gay; and will invariably drive out of the system the many ills that human flesh is heir to. A single bottle will prove to you Its merits as a health renewer, for It acts like a charm, especially when the complaint is of - an exhaustive nature, having a tendency to lessen the natural vigor of the brain and nervous system. For sale by H. G. Starr A Co. . . 24-ly Bakers Pain Panacea, cures pain in Man and Beast. For use externally and Internally. :, Dr. Roger's vegetable worm syrup instantly destroys worms and removes the Secretions which cause them. For sale by H. G. Starr & Co. 24-ly ' .l . Man's Noblest Work. This is an age of great works and wonderful invention. Steam, elec tricity, water, air, all are made to se-ve man, but unquestionably tne greatest inventions are those which f i reserve man's health and prolong his ife, snd among the greatest of these is Dr. lung's new Discovery ior con sumption. -Its effects are truly wonder ful and hundreds are happy to-day, who once looked forward to an early grave. For Coughs, Colds, Bronchitis, Asthma, loss of voice, Hay Fever, Hoarseness, Croup, or any affection whatever or the Ihroat. unestor Dungs, Dr. King's New Discovery will posi tively cure. we can cneeriuiiy recom mend it to all, and can unhesitatingly say it is the only sure cure for Throat and Dung Affections. Irlal bottles ten cents ; regular size $1. For sale by all druggists. -ly(c) ' Shiloh's Consumption Core. This Is beyond question the most suc cess! ul Dough Medicine we have ever jold, a rew doses Invariably cure the worst case of Cough, Croup, and Bron chitis, while its wonderful success In the cure of Consumption is without a parallel In the history of medicine. Since Its first discovery it has been sold on a guarantee, a test which no other mediciue can stand, ir you have a Cough we earnestly ask you to try It. Price 10 cts 60 cts. and $1.00. If your Lungs are sore, Chest, or Back, Lame, use Shiloh's Porous Plaster. Price 25c. Sold by H. O. Starr & Co. 6eow-ly(x) Answer This Question . . , Why do so many- people we see around us, seem to prefer to suiter ana be made miserable by Indigestion, Con stipation, Dizziness, Does or Appetite, Coming np of the Food, . Yellow Skin, when for 75 cts. we will sell them Shiloh's ' Tltallzer,' guaranteed to cure them. - Sold by H. G. Starr &Co. ... : 6eow-ly(a). . - Shiloh's Catarrh Bemedy. ' ", " A marvellous cure for Catarrh, Diph theria. Canker mouth, and Head Ache. With each bottle tbere Is an ingenious nasal Injector for the more successful treatment or those complaints without extra charge. Price oocts. Sold by 11 G. Starr & Co. 6eow-ly(a) las 1 Parnt aae lint Xcdicias ever Usee. Asolabiaatloa Hops, Buonu, Man- draklexxi Dandelion, wiujiuMbMaa4 vimuvaprvperuas or ail KMf Binsn, m ti tiw"" snood Purtfler, Liver Rez u IX or ano w ,"Ul """S agvnt Mo A as nonlblr kma M wbrs Has Kianu. ..X'OO j lr(c U-ir oumt-mtit ThYMwlifiT!ESTt3tl!iplalia!rm. To mil wbm s niilojms" Irnralori tvorUMbonlor rr orsmns, r who n- iiirM AppMiaarV. Tonio aad mild BlUBalaat, llopIUttara ara H.alX.,,M Wltnout intOX- Icatina. Xo utmlur whalTottr r.mMtiOT or symptoms ra what tba Stacaaa or allX"" a ilo bit ten. I ion t wait until yoa ra atek bat i( ya onlr faai bad or mtaerabla,. "a Uam at oaeo. ltnwraaTayourUra.lthajsvad aundrada. SSOO 'HI ha paid for a ' tba will wot suraorlMlp. l)o aot suVst -tyaarfriaiMia saHar.but aaa aad unra Utm Kam Hop B Raaaambar, Hop Bitten la BoVUe, dnursad druuk.D nostrum, but tba rarest aad boat MedlclnarTarinailaitba "ISTlUDS and Mora aad na penoa or tamHy' i r aboald uo wltnout wcm. D. I. O. la an ahaorite and Irroriattbla c foriminKtanrWiUwui opium, tuuv-otica. all aoM br rlnifr.-Ma, for circular. Sap Bltlm !, Ca TETTSSSS Tt Jones 14ard Rubber 1 Rare yoa en um hew Tinmen reoentry pat on tn market by the Cexluloid k Haxd Bubbbb Tbom Co.. of Now York CKy? Tbey reaalr no tenjrthy cer tlflcate--ny man of ordinary Intelligence can aea that umj ar we moat aeiuiDits, aa wen mm ma aaea. appU' ucraioruu Relief and Cure of Hernia wetlBTwatcd. Nothlas ess equal them for Ughtoeaa amuuGj au eoeuxun. For Sale by J. W. HOUGHTON, U . . VKLLINGT05. OHIO II I I II chance la offered, thereby alwaya keeping H M r poverty from your door. Tboae wbo alwaya 1 1 I I I take advantage of the good chances for making money that are offered, generally oecome wealthy, while tboae who do not Improve ancb a mm art Yoareelrca br maklnr money wnes a moemn coancea remain ra poreny. e wan. manj men. women, boya and glrla to work for as rtitht In tnelrown local. Ue. The buitneaa will pay more than ten tlmea ordlnarv waa-ea. We furnlah an exoenalra outfit suad all that yon need, free. Mo one who engagea fall to mue money very rapiaiy. i on can aeTote yoar wnoie time to the work, or only your apex momenta. Full Information and all that la needed aent free. Addreaa bTuaon co., romaoo, Maine. -iy $5 Outfit srat fras te tkeas who wtaa te smraae tne moat pleasant snd prostaMe boelneea known- BTr?ihng new. Capital not required. Wajwlll furnlah you eeerrtblas. SiOs day and upwards la eaaily made without etavlnn lata fraan lnaiia eaur sight. Vq risk wbateTer. Man new workers wanted St onea. Many are naakles; fortunes at tne euslueaa. Ladles make as macb aa men. and ount boya and tlrls make (rest nay. He one whs Is wining to work falls to make more money every day than eaa be made In s week at any ordinary empioymeDt. Tboae who ena-ags at once will and a hort road te tsrtsos. ftrl real U- mlMMTt a ua. rarUaad, laalaa. la" WANTED COLDEST Agents for ths A TXT TT Or LIGHT on the .tW A W .-aH QREAT FUTURE. School Teachera. Stndenta. Yonnv Wm and Ladtea. acting na agenta for thl book, are making orer giuo a month. Sella faat. One agent aold 51 flrat IS daye, anot her In 8 dara, anoi her 11 In ne day. another 15 and S Blblea In 9 dara. Secure territory quick. Alao agenta wantea tor tne luutratea neviaea new reaie meat, and for the finest family Blblea erer aold by aTasrciiisv. oruu mr ur.aisvrs. P. W. Z1KOLKB CO-i 5 Aran St. Philadelphia. Fa. 43-13 W JC Adam St.. Chicago, 1U. aaaanwaaai.wa. BUT All ESTEY QRGAH and you will have IHIwS 3BS5w5P3 A line assortment o exhibition at my rooms, to which the.pub- lic are cordially invited. Tyrxn VXSCHER, 37 . General Manager, j.;:.-w.-H0iTaHT0iT, PKALKR IN Patent' Medicines, Dye Stuffs, Trusses," - and Shoulder Braces. OUR STOCK OF PATENT MEDICINES 1 embraces all of the standard goods, and is fresh, being purchased direct of . Manufacturers. We keep a full line at all times. We have ' also a large and well selected stock of ' consisting of the finest and best Perfumes, Soaps, Cosmetics, Hair Brushes, Tooth Brashes, Combs, Mirrors, etc., which are all first-class goods, and which will be sold Terr low. Our stock of aaaM tawaa will be closed out at actual cost, aud will afford 9l an opportunity to pur chase at a bargain. ' We have also a very large line of the best manufacturers of which we are offering at a great reduction all warranted. - A fine stock of for medicinal purposes only. We cordially invite the public to call and " examine our goods, confident that we can show them As Gobi Goods and as Low Prices as any house in the West side Public Sguare, Now is the BALDWIN, LAUNDON & CO.'S ia the place to buy. They have .i . -tn -i " -l " i max will maKe you nappy, ana tion a few tilings displayed : "'A large variety of ladies' cniejs, at all prices. A large variety of Fancy Boxes. -A large variety of Comb Cases. . A large variety of Card Receivers. A large variety of Japan Ware. ' A large variety of Toilet Boxes. " ' A large variety of Hand 'Glasses. A large variety of Fancy Vases. WaiiQ& EaelEeEy fey i& Set, In Dress Goods, - 1 Black Cashmere?, Cheaper than ever. JAMESTOWN ALPACAS, . A new lot just received. nosicryr Gloves, w 9 w Will be sold cheap, to close. In Vf.4 aa mm iww r We are prepared If we cannot sell you we will give you some low prices in of charge. BALDWIN, LAUIXDON & Co. laMteiS, WiTCS, Ita! DR..J. B. MARCHISI, ' - UTICA.N.Y., JDisoorerer of DH, MABXJH1ST3 UTERINE CATH0UCON, A POSITIVE CORE FOR FEMALE COMPLAIITS. Tale remedy will act in harmony with the Fe male system st'sll times, snd slM immediately epos, tne abdominal sad uterine muscles, snd re ctors them to a heslthr snd strong condition. Or. Hsrehisi's Uterine Cstholicon will curs fan lug of the womb, Laeorrhces, Chronic Inflamma tion snd Ulceration of the Womb, Incidental Heuionuago or Flooding, Painful, Suppressed aad Irregular Menstruation, Kidney Complaint, aad is especially sdspted to the Chsnge of Life. Send for pamphlet free. All letters of Inquiry freely snswered. Address ss shore. . tOR SALE BV ALI, DBlItieiSTS. Price sl-60Pr bottle. Be sore snd ask for Sr. Msrchisi's Uterine Cstholicoo. Take no other. KREICER A EMERSON, Wellington. State can afford. Wellington, Ohio, T. SOUGHTOH. time, and a large -variety of everything a i : rr ai very low prices. iu .men and gentlemen1 s Silk Handher- Good Bargains ! Hlttens anil Fnrs to give good bargains. Thoroughfare BKTWKKN THE EAHT .AJEaXX) "KXTH&I? I THK .-' ' : -".' GEEAT BEE LINE E0TJTE C.C.C.& I. R'y. No Midnight Changes! Fast Trains! a. CtinnectioTis in Union Depots for all principal points East, We6t and South. By this Line special facilities are afforded parties moving to the far West, in the way of low rates and NO EMIGRANT TRAINS I EST AH classes of passengers are carried mrongQ on tipstss j rains, equipped wim all modern applisnces to insure speed, com fort and safety. Elegant Day Coaches, Draw-ing-Kooin and Sleeping Cars, Reclining Chair Cars and Hotel Cars, attached to all Express -trains between Clevehsd and St. Louis ui Indianapolis. ' Drawing-Koom and Sleeping Cars with Day Coaches Cleveland to Cincinnati and Colum bus, WITHOUT CHAHGB. Consult your best interests by asking for and receiving a ticket via C. C. C. & I. Railway. For maps, time-tables and other information, ask your local Ticket Agent. A. J. SMITH, Gen. Pas. Ait E. B. THOMAS, Gen. Manager. : ; Trains leave Wellington Station on this line as follows: GOING "west. - No. 11 Cleveland & Ind'polis Ex.. 8.48 am. No. 7 Columbus Express 5.37p.m. ro. a A igut iLxpress u.uup.m. No. 25 Local Freight. 12.50 m. GOIN'O EAST. No. 3 Night Express 5 43 a.m. No. 8 Cleveland Accommodation 8.48 a.m. No. 12 New York Express........ 1.40p.m. No. 6 New York Express .... 9.00 p.m. No. 26 Local Freight 2.11 o m. THE THE CREAT v B UHZUTGTOJr HO TJTB. rifNo other line runs Three Through Pa. sender Trains Dally between Chicago, Des Moines, Council Bluffs, Omaha. Lincoln, St. Joseph, Atchison, Topeka and Kansas City. Direct connections for all points in Kansas, Nebraska, Colorado, Wyoming, Montana, Ne vada. New Mexico. Arizona. Idaho, Oregon and California. The Shortest, Speediest and Most uomrorta ble Route via Hannibal to Fort Scott, Denison, Dallas, Houston, Austin, San Antonio, Galvear ton and all points in Texas. - The unequal ed inducements offered by this T.ine to Travelers and Tourists, are as follows: The celebrated Pullman (16-wheel) Palace Sleeping Cars, run only on this Line, C, IS. Q. Palace Drawing-Room Cars, with Horton's Reclining Chairs. No extra charge for Seats in Reclining Chairs. The famous C, R. A Q. Palace Dining Cars. Gorgeous Smoking Cars fitted with Elegant High-Backed Rattan Re volving Chairs for the exclusive use of first class passengers. Steel LTacK ana oupenor isquipmeni, com- , bined with their Great Through Car Arrange ment, makes this, above all others, the favorite Route to the South, South-West, and the Fax West- Try it, and you will una traveling a luxury Instead of a discomfort. Through Tickets via this Celebrated Line for sale at all offices in the United States and Canada. All information about Rates of Fare. Bleep ing Car Accommodations, Time Tables, 4c, will be cheerfully given, and will send Free to any address an elegant County Map ot United States, in colors, by applying to. PEUCrVAL LOWKLU General rasavngrr Azent, Chicago. T J. roRTER. General Manaaer, Chicago. flrst-dMH t-icrRMioir TicitT, from t Wca-iro an I !x-l ooinr-. to DBN VER. COLORADO SPTtTTTGS, ami PUEBLO, AND RE TURKS', by MX (fit DirncBRUT itniTK, nt wonder fnily low rates. Tha ticke. will b trood Kemp wert within fifteen (1S dayri fmm dnte of "-nl. and to return until October 31t following. Pullman Palace Cars are run 1t th rvininanv rrom CHICAGO t COtTNClt, BLUFFS. TOPEKA an KAN S A3 CIXy, forraicjc a Hue wi'l but one t-hacge of cars to DENVBf and PUEBLO. Dlnlnsr anf are at tached to all through u-ain-s in whid meaJs can be obtained at the rcaaon able priue of seventy-fire centa. For rates, farther information, and elecant Alup of United feiUitaA free, addrbsa, 0K. f ASS BAGTsaCB afcO-BaB, Chicaoo, ILIs. It will only cost yon a POSTA I. jaj CARD or letter to get prices on tT FAIRBANKS SCALES, Hancock Inspirators, Eclipse Wind Mills. How Lost, How Restored! Just nubllrtied, a new edition of IB. CTLVEK wrvir r -ri.ERR ATED ESSAY on the radical cure Sil I )"'lri.iX,n ipiiansT and Fits, Induced br self ta? TSSSSSSrS SSSnrabl. rUaay clearly demonstrate, from a thirty year.' Dcceagful nraci Ice. tbat the alarmlnjt conaequenceaa of aelf -abuas S I radically cured ; po.nUng out a mode of cure at once almple. certain' and etfeetuaU by mean, of wi.ith erery lUlTerer. no matter what bis condition may V. may cure himself cheaply, privately and HTT-'jis lecture should be In ths hands of erery youth and every man In the land. bent under seal. In a p ain envelope, to any address, post-paid, on receipt of six cents or two postage Ye also luaws st tars coxa) for Tap 'Worm. Addreaa TVb CnlvarweU Medical Co.. 41 As St.. Nw Tobk, N. T.;P. O. Box 4568 $10 Oattlt furnished free, wltbfull inractloMfo' mnrfurilni the most Drofltable business tnaa any one can engage In. The bulnf easy to learn, and our Instructions are so aim ' nle and nialn. that any one can make pe" proflta from the very start. .No one can fail wuu.. willing to work. Women are as aucceasful as men Boys and glrla can earn large sums. Many have maae at the business over one hundred dollars In aaiugie I week. Nothing like It ever known before, .au engage are surpHsed at tne ease ana nip whlcn they are able to make money Toucan in tnia nusineaa aunnie J1,ul T.. You do not have to Invest capital In it tbe risk. Those who need ready money should I write to us at once. All furnished free. Address T sirs -J. Si tin m - S1 S Ca souowma on ci - Jn 2 gj R BEST AoKusta Maine.