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THE WELLINGTON ENTERPRISE PUBLISHED KYEKY WKDNESDAt. E. I- FRENCH, KD1TOB. THE FRENCH PRINTING COMPANY, , O. I COUCH, RKCKIVEB. SUBSCRIPTION. One Year.... Six Months . ..51.no The name of the writer muat araompani nil letters for publlctln or reiiursts for inlorma tlun In order to temre aitentlon. The name U nut required fur ulllcailuii nwesKarily, but lor the Information "f the editor. I'uaiKW" article no Into the waste bnski-t. WEDNESDAY, Al'liUST 2, 1S09. The Brooklyn Standar J Union speaks of the Alger-l'ingree alliance as an A. P. A affair. Nearly fifty naval vessels are under Construction in American dock yards, including a number for foreign powers, It will not take the untutored Fili pino many moons to discover that the American dollar is for some reason or other worth twice as much as the Spanish dollar which he has been using. The New York Journal has again de manded of the President that he speak out and announce a definite policy concerning the 1'hilippines, and the Cincinnati Enquirer joins in the echo. Yet both of these yellow sheets know that the President has no authority to announce a permanent policy which this country shall assume toward any of the territory acquired from Spain. This prerogative lies solely with Con gress and these papers well know it, but they count on deceiving the peo ple who may not know. They would ereate the impression, and they inti mate, tiiat llit: President lacks back bone, and that he is afraid to declare a purpose toward the Philippines. It is simply an attempt to make political capital by assuming that everybody believes the President has the right to establish a permanent government in the islands, but that he wants the cou rage to exercise it. Thirty dollars for a piano, live dol lars for a billiard table, twenty-five dollars for four watches and clocks, ninety dollars for three horses and three carriages, five dollars for a sew ing machine, and household goods to the total amount of $250, are the val ues placed upon his personal belong ings by Mr. Wm. J. iiryan in answer to the tax assessor of Lincoln, Neb. A casual examination of these figures creates the pleasing impression among his admirers that Mr. Bryan is really one of the people and lives most mod estly. A little closer scrutiny, how ever discloses the unpleasant fact that Mr. Bryan has either driven exceedingly hard bargains in the ac quisition of all the necessities and some of the luxuries of life and has used dollars of exceedingly great pur chasing power, or else he has, like or dinary mortals, simply been telling the tax assesssr a good-sized fairytale, . to avoid contributing too much to the support of the State. The president of the United States will be asked to attend the National Export exposition and to preside at the opening session of the Internation al Commercial Congressjvtliieh will as semble in Philadelphia on October 10, while the exposition is in progress. The Mexican president, General Diaz, will also receive a special invita tion to be present at the opening cere monies of the Commercial congress. The suggestion that these invitations be extended was made by Director Gerreral Wilson, at the last meeting of the board of directors of the exposi tion. Dr. Wilson also suggested that a committee be appointed to visit Washington and extend the invitation personally to President McKinley. It was further recommended that a special invitation be transmitted to Admiral Dewey, to reach him at some point at which he will stop on his homeward voyage, and that a day be get aside to be known as "Dewey Day," to the end that fitting honor ue done the gallant olh'cer. Do n e All Me. A minister was in the News office on New Year's day, mid in the course of a c iiiv.x-4.it ion hp made the remark that he l,a. I , it nne tinv thought of en-pi;.'iii- H ti.'Wspuper work, but gave it u;.. he could engage in no occn pali in .t here he would huve to sup press or evade the truth Tor policy's sake. He was told in reply that the tditorwas just as honest as the preacher and was asked to point out a minister, who in all times, and under nil circumstances told the exact truth and the whole truth. He could not d it and no other man could do it. There is not a preacher in the state of Ohio who would dare to tell the whole truth about the members of his con gregation, for if ho did he would soon have a "call elsewhere." He could no more tell the truth than an ed iter can tell the truth. Any man who has heen in the newspaper business any length of time kn iws that most of the trouble which he encounters is caused by coming too near the truth in some of his statements. Both the preacher and the editor must carry a good whitewash brush and use it freely, Bueyrus News. Di:. liucgix's headache and NI'XJfAIXilA TAIiLKTS. The only wife, instant relief for neu ralgia, sciatica, faceache, headache or nciite pains In any part of the body. Warranted to please or monev refund ed. 25c. W. H. TISSOT A CO., Wellington, O. ANNIVERSARY SOUVENIR Ofthe Congregational Church has been Published. Book a Beauty. Numerous Cilia -On Sale at J. H. Wight & Sunn. The record of the proceedings of the seventy-fifth anniversary of the First Congregational church of Wellington has been published, and the book is now ready for delivery. It is a beauty. When it was first proposed to publish a verbatim report of this notable event in the history of the church, it was es timated that about sixty-four pages would be required to contain a com plete record. Arrangements' were ac cordingly made for such a publication and for sale of same at twenty-five cents per copy. The exercises of the anniversary, however, were decidedly more extensive than had been anti cipated, and the record could not be published even on very cheap paper and in small type, for the price con templated. The Anniversary now issued contains one hundred and lifty-two pages. The paper used is elegant in quality, the cover the best that is made in paper, the type clear and the mechanical work strictly first class in every respect. In addition to the complete report of the day, the book contains a list of an niversary committees, an introduction by the pastor, a roster of ministers who have served the church since its organization, a roster of officers of Un church for the same time, with bio graphical notes included in Dr. liar ton's history published a few years since, the same being enlarged and lirought dow n to date. It also eoti uins zinc etching cuts of "Wellington in 1855" the -'Old White Church" and the "Old Free Church", as they ap peared in Dr. Barton's History, and in addition thereto, beautiful half tones of the brick church that was burned, of the church edilice now standing, and of the following ministers who have preached for the church during the last fifty-five years, viz: Hev. A. It. Clark, liev. L. B. Lane, Hev. Jus. A. Daly, Kev. S. D. Ganimel, Kev. W. E. Barton, I). D., Kev. A. F. Skeele, Kev. Harry D. Sheldon, and Kev. A. II. Currier, D. I). These half tones could not have been successfully produced on cheaper paper and the cost of the book would not have been reduced more than ten cents per copy by dis carding the attractive features above enumerated. Such a book would have been entirely unsatisfactory. The book now offered will be highly prized by all who take an interest in the church and its history and will be val ued by all who care for the early his tory of Wellington. As Mr. Dalj would say, it. is, "Fit and Fair" and "Matches the Occasion." The trustees of the society have as sumed the financial responsibility at tending this publication, and undei their direction the book will be sold at fifty cents per copy. It is not expect ed that the present sales will meet the expense of publication, b it if after meeting such expenses, there shall lit a surplus, it will be turned into tin treasury of the society. The anniversary Souvenir can bi gotten during the week at the store ol J. II. Wight & Sons, and on Sunday of Deacon Fisher at the Congregation al Sunday School room. All mail or ders for the anniversary Soiivenii should be addressed to K. F. Webster. Chlliln-n ami Dirt. The mother who would have hei children healthy must not be afraid to have them occasionally dirty. While cleanliness is next to godliness, there is a clean dirt that comes from con tact with the sweet earth that is whole some. Have the little ones bathed frequently, insist that they come to meals with immaculate hands and faces, but, between meals, have them so dressed that they are free to run and romp as they will. An over-carelul mother of an only child complained to a physician that her baby was pale and delicate, lie asked to see the child, and the nurse lirough. in the two-year-old from the veranda, where he had been seated on a rug, looking at a picture-bouk. His dainty nainsook frock was spotless, as were also the pink kid bouts and silk socks. "What that child needs is whole some dirt," was the physician's ver d.ct. "Put a gingham frock and plain shoes on him, and turn him loose on the lawn or in the fresh earth. If he is not rosy and happy in a month, lei me know." At the expiration of the prescribed time the baby was transformed. The eyes that had been heavy were bright, the skin had acquired a healthful glow, the arms and legs were plump, and the languid, tired little patient had be come a rollicking boy. The freedom, fresh nir, and clean dirt had, in o month's time, wrought agreater change in the child's system than all the skill of the medical fraternity could have effected. Mothers who take their little school boys and girls away for vacation should let them romp at w ill out of doois, fish in the brook,, ride, on the h.iy, and wear strong shoes and cloth ing of w hich they need not be too care ful. A child is much happier if un trammelled by too many "don'ts." And the mother is happier too if she need not say "don't" every hour in the day. Harper's Bazar. CAPT. WILLIAM ASTOK CHAN LEU, Congressman from New York, ic the president of Tun Nkw Yoiik Stah. which is giying away a FORTY DOL LAR BICYCLE daily, as off. red by their advertisement in another column. Hon. Amos J. Cummings, M. C, Col. Asa Bird Gardner, District Attorney nl New York, ex-fiovernor Hogg, of Tex as, and Col. Fred. Feigl, of New York, are among the well known names in their Board of Directors. Scarry. ' Trior to the present century scurvy was one of the most dreaded diseases on shipboard. Armies were declmnted by it and navies rendered useless; sometimes half a ship's crew would be disabled by scurvy. Until the research es of physicians, showed that it owed its origin to the lack of fresh vegetables, its ravages were frequent and wide spread. In 1795 there was introduced into the British navy the admirable regulations of provisioning ships-of-war drawn up by Diane. Since then scurvy has almost disappeared. At the present time it is seen only In excep tional circumstances, such us have re cently arisen in the Klondike. Even in the long, lonely voyages to the pole our means of furnishing the crews with vegetable food in various forms has prevented nny outbrenk of Importance. Fhiludelphia Medical Journal. The Power of Alonlo. At the recent lioyle lecture on the "Perception of Musical Tone," delivered at Oxford, Prof. McKenilrick pointed out that the roots of the auditory nerves are probably more widely dis tributed and have more extensive con nections thun thosp of any other nerve. Tho Intrieute connections of these nerves tire only being unraveled. The professor stated that thisexpluined how music penetrates to the roots of our being and influences rellex mechanisms in the brain und in the body by associa tional paths. "Thus there is scarcely a function of the body that may not be affected by the rhythmic pulsations, melodic progressions and harmonic combinations of music tones." Chi cago Tribune. A Sudden l;ni;iiKi-iiirnt. Man Looking for a Flat (to friend) 1 tell you, these landlords arc perfeel brutes. They seem to think children have no right to live. Every decent apartment I Und the agent tells me no children are taken. Ilis Friend You come up to our building. No objections there house full of children. I've five, you know. The third flat is vacant, too. Man nml wife moved out last week because there were so many children. Come home with me now and look at it. "ll'm, thanks cr I'm afraid I can't to-night, old man. I just recall an en gagement I can't putoff." N. Y. World. Ilia Di-slre. Mrs. Mcfiorry Vez'll hov to do sawmthin' wid thot clock to make ut run corrictly. Sure, phwhiniver Oi don't set ut buck ivcry half dny ut gains an hour or more in ivery tin or twelve. MeCiorry Lave it alone till ut gits a whole day fast. Oi want 1o foind out phwither ut would prove thot we was livin' back in yesterday an' dhe clock was on toime, or we was aid roight an' dhe clock was telliu' dhu toime av to morrow to-day. Puck. So Tobaeeo for .Virwejslan Dora. A law was recently passed in Nor way prohibiting the sale of tobacco to any boy under 10 years of age without a signed order from an adult relative or employer. Even tourists who offer cigurettcB to boys render themselves liable to prosecution. The police are instructed to confiscate the pipes, cigars and cigarettes of lads who smoke In the public streets. A fine for the offense is also imposed, which may be anywhere between SO cents and $25. Chicago Inter Ocean. CooperatlTC Agriculture. During nine years of steady work Horace Thinket's nonpolitical Irish agricultural organization has wrought a quiet revolution by teaching the farmers the benefits of cooperation, und as a result there are now over 100 aux iliary dairying societies, with 10,000 members; five miscellaneous societies, with about 2,000 members; two fed erations and three banks. N. Y. Sun. A Queen's Superstition. The queen regent of Spuin carries a crow's eye in her bosom. As it is not mounted und rests directly on her heurt, its sharp edges cause her many a pricking. "If it ceases to prick, then Spain will be once more happy und prosperous;" this according to a prophecy by Marie Christina's grand mother. N. Y. Journal. Rain on the Great Lakes. There are eight inches more rainfall on the south shore of Lake Superior than on the north shore, and three inches more in the cases of Erie and Ontario. There is also a greater precip itation on the eastern shores of Lukes Huron nnd Michigan than on the west ern. Chicago Tribune. A Victorious Defense. "Dorothy has quit making me un comfortable by telling me my hat wasn't on straight." "What stopped her?" "Every time she did it I told her she had too much powder on her nose." Chicago llccord. A Close Imitation. "I wish George would shave off that fuzzy little mustache." "Why?" "He kissed me lust night nnd I thought it was a caterpillar!" Cleve land Plain Dealer. An Incidental. Ilibbs See that striking-looking girl there. She married millions. Ilobbs Who's the insignificunt-hiok-ing fellow with her? "Oh, he's the man she married." Philadelphia, North American. The Ileal Ordeal. "And you think I'd better ask your father now?" "Yes. It will be a little mild practice for you. Then come back nnd ask ma!" Cleveland Plain Denier. Wants a Good Deal. A gambler always wants a good deal for his money. Chicago Daily ."Jews. I'hlllnnlnr lluflTalo. The Philippine buffalo, w hich Is pre ferred to horses or donkeys, is almost an amphibious unimal. It cannot do hard work for any length of time w ith out bathing and wallow ing in the mud. N. Y. World. Hardest Kind of Work. "What do you find Hie most ditllcult task?" asked the Idle friend. "The hardest thing about my job," the all-round clerk replied, "is going on with my work, w hen I have drawn my pay in advance." Bangor News. MRS. W. W. HARVEY. She has Pasi-ed to the Great Itcyom!. Funeral Services Yestcrdny at lloiiieoii F.HMt Mnill .Street. Mrs. W. W. Harvey died lust Sunday night at two o'clock in the morning. The lunerul was held Tin sday after noon at her late residence on East Main street, just about a week after she fell from the back steps, losing consciousness The funeral services were conducted by Kev. K. L. Wag goner,' of the M. E. Church, this city and Mr. Brown, of the Christian Alli ance, Cleveland, Dr. Houghton reading h biographical sketch. The music was furnished by a quartet composed of Mines. E. C. Cushion nnd II. 15. Daugherty and Messrs'. J. P. Eidt and E. C. Cushion. Nancy Singleton was born at Utica, Penna., April 12. lfill. Thence she moved with her parents to Greenwich, 0 where she married W. W. Harvey, May 11, .1850. They moved to Brighton inlS'JO, and in 1871 came to. Welling ton, which place has almost contimi ously been their residence since. Of their four children three are living. Mrs. Harvey died a member of tin Methodist Church, of which organiza tion she has been a member for the last thirty-nine years. Wheeling & I.Hlte Erie. Tri-state Band Association reunion, Detroit, Mich. One fare round trip. ugust 15-10, Upturning limit, Aug ust R L. A. W. meet, Boston, Mass. One fare round trip. August 11-12. Re turning limit August 20. Tickets can lie extended. United Society of Free Baptist young .icople, Hillsdale, Mich. One fare otind trip. September 5-0. Kettiru ug limit September 11. Pilgrimage of Cryptic Masons, Den ver, Colorado. One fare plus yiM. To Deliver, Colorado. Springs or Pueblo, ,'oing August 4-0, returning limit Sep tember 1. BIG FOCI! KOUTK. National meet League of American Wheelmen, Boston, Mass., August. 11 II), '99. One fare round trip. Consult igent for limits, rates, etc. Young People's Christian Union of he United Presbyterian Church an nual convention, Pittsburg, Pa., Aug. 2-7, '99. One fare round trip. "WHAT TUFA' SAY" Is the title of nn exceedingly well printed and finely illustrated booklet, which has just been issued and distrib uted by the Chicago & Xoi tli-Westci n l!y., describing their electric lighted, ;!lth century train, "the North-Western Limited." It is unique in design iikI composition and affords cntertuin ng reading. A copy will be sent to any address by D. W. Aldridge, 12" The Arcade, Cleveland, Ohio. "Billy" Mctiraw has resigned his po sition as engineer at the Hour mill und eturned to Greenwich. Will Sprugue is his successor. Spain's Greatest Need. Mr. li. P. Olivia, of Barcelona, Spain, pends his winters at Aiken, S. C. Weak icrves had caused severe pains in the lack of his head. On using Electric Hitters, America's greatest blood and nerve remedy, all pain soon left him. lie says this grand medicine is v im t his country needs. All America knows that it cures liver and kidney trouble, purities the blood, tones up the stom .ich, strengthens the nerves, puts vim, vigor and new life into every mi sele, nerve and organ of the body. If weak, tired or ailing, you need it. Every bot tle guaranteed, only 50 cents. Sold by Near & Wells, druggists. (1) L. E. Lyons has just returned from Loudonvillo, O., where ho put in 2 100 square feet of maiiila black-board. iiKitn.f: iioKsi-: book. Biggie Horse Book, advertised in anol her column, contains more "horse M-nse" than many volumes ten times lis size. It tells all about breeds, about feeding and watering, aboul table and road management, of w hims mil vices, of harness, of diseases nml remedies, of breeding and colt educa tion, of shoeing, nnd indeed it covers the whole subject in a concise, prac tical and interesting manner. It con tains U'S pages, is profusely and beau tifully illustrated, and handsomely bound in cloth. Every man or wo man who drives a horse should have a copy. The price is 50 cents, free by mail. Address the publishers, Wilmer tkinsor, Co., Philadelphia. The Farm Journal is 22 years old, irints W tons of paper a month, und is nit of debt; it is cut to fit every pro gressive farmer nnd villager. Don't you want this line little paper? Very well, pay a year ahead for The Welling ton Enterprise and we will have the t'artu Journal sent to your address for the balance of. 1S99 and all of 1900, IPtil, 1902 and 1903 nearly five yctirs ind it will get to you if alive and any where on this planet. anyyilng you invent or Improve ; oIfo grit PROIECflON. Hxml mvfol !,,,!, I, r,r, .,(,, i for free eyiminstion nnd advice. BOOK ON PATENTS Kffi WC.A.SNOW&CO. Patent Lawyer WASHINGTON, D.C. L .......... .-B.i. fl MSIll 111 M fit This Sign GaTe Waralag. Up on the northern Mississippi on the. Wisconsin side is a steamboat landing. Only the boats from Dubuque to points up the river touch there now, but it was once a thriving landing. The old river town of Potosi is a mile and a half in bind now, but in the busy days it stood on what was the bank of the river. Now there is a railroad between it and tho river. Its people are mostly nged, and they toil not. Work seems unneces sary, and there is plenty of money for food and beer, which some of the in corrigible gay blades of the river tlnya still drink. This is the reason that upon the levee now there stands a sole build ing, and this is a saloon. There Ib a brewery sign on one corner, and a rudely-lettered sign on the side of tie build ing. Upon this is painted the owner's name and his motto, thus: "A stands for Andy, but Andy won't stand for the beer." Chicago Times-Herald. The Horse's Hoof. The foot of a horse is one of the most Ingenious and unexampled pieces of mechanism in unimul structure. The hoof contains a series of vertical and thin laminae of horn amounting to about 000 und forming a complete lin ing to it. In this lire fitted us many laminae belonging to the cofliu bone, while both sets are elastic nnd adher ent. The edge of a quire of paper, in serted leaf by leaf into another, will convey a sullicieut idea of the arrange ment. Thus the weight of the animal is supported by as many elastic springs as there are laminae in all the feet, amounting to about 4,000, distributed in the most secure manner., since every spring is acted on in an oblique direc tion. Boston Budget. Forest Areas In North America. The forest area of all the British pos sessions in America is estimated at about 800,000,000 acres. The settler has cut his way into the fringe of the vast woodland, but his depredations are nothing as compared with the terrific scourge of fire which has rampaged through It at different times. The United States has about 450,000,000 acres of forest, but this Is being rapid ly depleted by the ax and by destruc tive fires. The government is now in vestigating means to prevent or con trol the latter. Chicago Chronicle. Itunltlng It In. "It doesn't pay to be good," said a little Zebidce boy. "Why, Willie, I'm Bhocked," Enid his mother. "Whatever put that idea into your head?" "Pa." "What do you meun?" "You know he whipped me forgoing in swimming last Sunday afternoon." "Yes; I remember it." "Well, thatvery morning he preached a sermon about cleanliness being next to godliness." St. Paul Clobe. Seeds Survive Great Cold. A New York experimenter has been trying the effect of very low temper atures on scads. Seeds of peas, oats, barley and wheat were kept for several hours at 312 degrees below zero that is what he says for 110 hours. After being thawed out nnd planted the seeds grew all right. There seems to be no further cause for alarm over freezing seeds. We seldom have it as low as 312 degrees below zero for 110 hours at a time, even in Dakota. N. Y. Sun. Kndden Itelunse. "He's a mean man," was the earnest comment; "a mighty mean man." "What has occurred'.1" "I was explaining to him my success in demonstrating the power of mind over matter. I was telling him how 1 had lirought my will and my intellect to bear upon a corn, and how I hud subjugated (he delusion called pain, when he deliberately stepped on my foot!" Ohio State Journal. One of the lllreelors. "Impossible," exclaimed the caller to the proud mother. "I can't believe that you son, who has only been in the em ploy of that great corporation for six months, is already a director." "Well, lean. James isn splendid pen man, and here is the news in his last let ter. He had just finished directing 10, 000 circulars." Detroit Free Press. Spiders and the Diving Hell. There is nothing new in the diving bell. Long before man thought he in vented it the water spider knew all about it. 'i lie water spider crawls down a reed, dragging his diving bell with him, and anchors it under water on a level keel so that the nir it con tains keeps the water out. N. Y. World. The Terror of llrderubnd. It is on record that no fewer than 23 persons were killed by a man-cuting panther In the Ellichpore district, Hyderabad, during the past 12 mouths. The brute remains at large, despite the reward of 300 rupees offered for his capture. Post of Delhi. Beared, "Why do the young men treat June so rudely?" "The story got out that Jane said that the first man who suited her she'd pro pose to him on the spot." Cleveland Plain Dealer. Sent the Wife. Minister 1 am sorry 1 didn't see you at church yesterday, Tumtnus. Tummus Weel, ye see, It wis siccan a wat day It wlsna fit to turn oot a dog In. But I sent the wife, sir. Tit-Bits. Mean Teachers. A boy never forgets a teacher who serves him a mean trick. The wonder is that so few school-teachers get killed. Washington (la.) Democrat. Insurmountable. Tom What are the relations between you and Miss Van Dyke nowadays? Jnek (gloomily) Her farther and "iot her. Cassell'a. Microbes In Tobacco. Herr Suehsland, a (Icrman scientist, hns discovered that the aroma of to bacco is due to microbes, und it Is said he will putent, if be can, a process for making cheap cigars smell like expen sive ones. Chicago Inter Ocean. Of Course Not. "Marriage is so often a failure," said Miss Caustique, 'that I don't blame women a bit for being old maida." "Blame them?" tald the crusty bach elor. "Of oourM net It in? L?3 A t'lond Factory. One of the sections of the great Taris exhibition of 1900 will be termed "Cloudland." There the visitors will be able to move about in atmospheric conditions which, under ordinary cir cumstances, can only be reached by a balloon ascent. The giant apparatus which will work this seeming miracle is surely the most murvelous factory ever constructed, for by its agency the operations of nature will be imitated so faithfully and bo completely thut every type of cloud will be reproduced ut will in miniature. The principle of cloud making, it will be remembered, is that if a mass of air containing water vnpor is cooled below its saturation or dew point condensation of the vnpor will set In. The cloud Is thus manufac tured, and being allowed to escape into the air forms a uiiuiature cloud alike in every respect to the clouds with which we are familiar. London. Leuder. KlrunKe I.lfe in Argentina. Prof. Lawrence .Bruner, who spent the year 1S98 investigating the grass hopper plague in Argentina, gayB that only Australia could match Argentina In the singularity of its life forms. It is a country where everything pro tects Itself. "The trees have thorns, the grasses and weeds are provided with thorns und sharp blades, and herba ceous plants are shielded with burrs." Forests exist where rains arc scarcest, and natives say that sometimes when heavy rains fall the trees die from too much moisture. Some birds, belonging to the same order as our water-fowl, avoid water. Many Argentina birds possess spurs on their wings. Youth's Companion. Ilrazcu. "That fellow's got a cheek you could write a novel on," said the Montclalr boss barber as the previous shave left the shop. "Why? What did you do with him, cut him?" I nslccd, takiugan interestin the di.-.cus.sion. "Cut him! Not on your life!" contin ued the boss, In the Verona vernacular. "It was like shaving a bronze statue of Lincoln! You see, he has traveled for seven years for a hardware house in Trenton, nnd with his cheek you couldn't cut him if you shaved him with a drawing knife." The boss is quite a sharp blade himself-, Hardware. An Illustration. "What a large head you have," re marked the luquacious barber to on Irish customer. "Why, it's twice as large as mine." "But 01 suppose you're afther foind iu' thot head of yours large enough, though?" queried the Irishman. "Sure," replied the tonsorial artist, "It suits me all right." "Av course," said the son of Erin. "Phwat's the use av a man havin' n big trunk whin he has no clothes to put In it, Oi dunno." Chicago Evening News. In a llotlle. An old farmer who had been to Lon don was describing to his friends the splendor of the hotel he stayed at. "Everything was perfect," said he, "with the exception of one thing they kept the light burning nil night in my bedroom, a thing I ain't used to." "Well," said one of them, "why didn't you blow it out?" "Blow it out," said the farmer; "how could 1? The blessed thing was in side a bottle!" Tit-Bits. Knlser Frans Josef. The Austrian emperor leads a very regular life. He breakfnsts every morn ing, summer and winter, at five o'clock, on some cold meat und a eup of coffee. At noon he takes luncheon, und at three dinner. lie drinks one glass of beer daily, and a few glasses of wine, always the same kind. With the stroke of nine o'clock he goes to bed. N. Y. Journal. Education Finished. "The parcel postman has just called at the Twickeuhams', next door, and left a football, a bicycle, two cricket bats, a package of sweaters, a pair of spoon oars and a bundle of golf sticks." "Then their daughter must be home from college and her education -finished." London Figaro. lllble rrlnled on Asses' Skins. The most costly book in the Koyal library ut Stockholm is a Bible. It is said that 100 asses' skins were used for Its parchment leaves. There are 309 pages of writing and each page falls but one inch short of being a yard in length. The covers are solid planks four inches thick. N. Y. Sun. Muffles the Exhaust. The exhuust on steam yuehts is muf fled by a southerner's device, the pipe through which the stcum escapes en tering a channel in the bottom of the boat to be cooled by the water, after which it passes off through a valve un der the propeller. Wurkwoiuen In Cuba. Fitting work for women Is scarce in Cuba. Cooking and washing are mo nopolized by men. American employ ment of women in the Havana post oflice has been received with disap proval by the male Cubans. N. Y. Sun. Didn't Mnke lllin Feel Mo. Mrs. Youngwife You are awful dear to me, Harry. Harry Yes, but your habit of telling others about it makes me feel cheap. Kiehmond Dslpntch. Grasshopper riugne In Spain. Crasshoppers have become a great plague in Spain, invading even the cit ies. In Asturia 5,000 soldiers were ordered to assist in destroying them, N. Y. Sun. Left Ills Name. Lady A gentleman culled, you say? Did he leave any name? Parlourmaid Oh, yes'm. He said It was Immaterial! Tit-Bits. Had a Lively Time. Watta Uave a good time yester day? Lushforth Good time? Old boy, 1 can taste It yetl Indianapolis Jour nal. Itonnd and Sqoare. It is a good idea to round out your "business career by squaring obliga tions. Chicago Dispatch. Covins and Ollllng. The cooing ia done before marriage i th billing afterward. Chicago Daily Wa ... . .1 fts Leading Specialists of Amsrlca 20 YEARS IN OHIO. 250,000 CURED. WECURE EMISSIONS Nothing can bo nioro dcmornliting io young or middle-aw-it men thau tliu jthh enco of tbcfo "iiitclilly InPHic." They product) wfiftknocs, Ticrvnusnew, a feeling of diKKUKt. arid a whole train of pyinptomn. 'J'hoy until, a man for buuiucM, married lifo (i lid focitil hnppinepfi. Ht matter wlirttlior caused by evil habits in youth, natural wnaknesHor pexual excesmtM, our tiavr Method Treatment will poeitivelj euro viiii. NO CURE NO PAY n Header, you need liHp, Eaily abuHO or later oxceMes may have weakened you, ExAfure may hav diseased you. You am not bi .fo till cured. Our New Method wUl euro you. You run no rick. 250,000 CURED Younfr STnn You are pale, fooble and ImHrjiird; norvoua, irritablo and ex citable. You become forgetful, tnoroao, and dcsiroudontt blotche and pimple, ku nken eye, wrinkled face, i too pins fortn nnd downeant countenuneo reveal tho blight of your ex.Btonco. WE CURE. VARICOCELE No mat tor how norioufi your case may bo, or liovv long; you may havo had it. our MOW AIET1IOJ) TUJCATMhNT will euro it, Tho "wormy vuina" return to their normal condition and hencd th wxiial organs roceivo proper nom-ih-incnt. Tiio organs become vitalised, all unnaturnl drains or losses ccoce and manly powors return. No temporary benefit, nut'a )erinnnent cire anno red. NO CUKK, NO I'AY. NO OlM-.KA-TION NKCKSSAKY. NO DETEN TION FUOM JJUrilNESS. H CURES GUARANTEED Wo trpnr. nnfl luro M I'll L IV OtKKT, K.MI.SSION.S, IMI'OTENL'Y.I t-llUCTIIHK, VAIUWOKLK, BKJII NAIi liOSSKS, BhADHKK AND K ID Is" UY Uinfa.on. CONSULTATION KKKK. HOOKS FREE. CIIAKOKS MODERATE. If unrible to call, wrilo fur a OUKKTION liLANK fur IlOME TU1.MTI i.-vr IHH. Kennedys Kergan 247 SUPERIOR STREET, CLEVELAND, O. A DIAMOND FOR A DOLLAR. A Limited Spi'dul Oiler Which Will Last for Tod Uitys Only. (iENI'INE JIAKHIUS DIAMONDS have a worM-wiite rqumilinn, It is almost inipoflflblu In iliililjL'iili.i t li.-lrl frulll t'l-nuiiiiMlitilnoiulH cort inu' IniiiiirmlK uf dollar each. 'I'lit-y nr worn by l tie brst .o(li!. Wr will forward u Gi-milm- llfir rioH ll'aniuiiil mounted in it heavy riiii-, pin, or !-tul to any addrct-H upon rm-int of price, $1.0".) ;irli. Kairin-jn, mt.-wh or drop., ga per pair. Itiuir i-ettiu'H are made in one continuous piece of tinck, i-belled gold, and are warranted not to tiiniipli. Special combination oll'er for ten (lays only. Hint: and chid aeiit to any addreHH npoil -receipt ot $l.:n. In ordering rinic cive tinner iiiea-uremeut by Ufln a piece of lrilij-alto lull particular. Addrc plainly. TIIU li.VIilllOS DIAMOND CO., Il!tl-11H3 IlllOADWST, New York. r'HiST-CXASS STEAMBOAT SEIiV-ICI-: HIOTWKIiX mSTitOIT AND CLKVKLAXD AND TOLEDO, 1)12 TliOIT -AXD MACKINAC. I). & C. Floating Steel Tnluce Steam ers arc now running daily between De troit nnd Cleveland. Two trijis per neck between Toledo, Detroit nml . Uai-kinnc Island. Regular service will lioiiimciicc June 17. Spend your vaca limi on tlie Great Lakes. Send Sj cents for illustrated pamphlet. Address A. A. Seliantz, (I. '. A., I). & C. Line, De troit, Mich. A Narrow lai-aiie. Thankful words written by Mm. Ada B. Hart, of Groton, S. I).: -'Was taken ivith a bad cold which settled on my lungs; ctiitirh set in and fin illy termi nated in consumption. Four doctors iive me up, saying I could live but a -liurt time. I gave myself up to my Saviour, determined, if I could not stay with my friends on earth, I would meet my absent ones above. My hus linnd was advised to get Dr. King's New Discovery for consumption, oughs and colds, I gave it a trial, took in ull i-ilit bottles. It has cured me, nnd, thank Hod, I am saved and now a well and healthy woman." Trial bottles free nt Near & Wells' drug store. Reg ular sizes Me nnd $1.00. Guaranteed or price refunded. (1) WatiJi the I.iilifil on Your Taper, If it reads "Uan98" it indicates that your subscription expired Jan. 1, 180S, and that you are in arrears. Look at the label on this week's paper and if your subscription has expired will you ob lige us by giving it your prompt at tention. Two of a Kind. There is at least one man in the country who is in a position to feel for General Eagan. Malier, the jockey, who made such a bad job at riding the favorite, Banastar, in the late suburb an horse-race, has been sentenced by liis employer, Mr. Clark, to draw pay for two years without doing any work. Air. Clark has a contract with Maher for two years, at (10,000 a year. He does not release him. He proposes to hold hiin to his employment, pay him his salary, and give him nothing to do. Where General Eugun has the advant age of Maher is in being able to leave t he country. Where Maher gets the lielter of Eagan is in drawing larger pay. It is remarkable that this unus ual form of retribution should obtain in two conspicuous instances within the same half-year. E. S. Martin, in Harper's Weekly. t r-, I,