Democratic Northwest. [volume], March 24, 1881, Image 6

About Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894

Image provided by: Ohio History Connection, Columbus, OH

                
THE DEMOCRATIC NORTHWEST, THUKSDAY. MARCH 2..IS1.
lore r Xr. SpoiVl)kt-' UoMextit
Troublts.
'Look Lero. my tiear,' Mr.
poojH'Ud?, tossing over the !acc
and ribbons in Lis wiles bureau draw
er; 'what has become of the can opener?
I dou't 6oe it anywhere.'
Vvhal do you want of it?" askoi
Mrs. poopcuJyke, lluttering up to
protect her trinkets, and try to gaio a
little time.
'1 want to open some sardines with
it,' retorted Mr. Spoopendyke, ban
rtoix.ijr the drawer ami hunting
through the work-basket. 'Think 1
want to comb my hair with it? Im
agine 1 wanted to write a letter with
it? "Well, I don't. 1 want some
sardines. What have you done with
it?' .
'You might take your big knifo,'
recommended Mrs. Spooixjndyke.
'The large blade is just the thing for
that, you know.'
Mr. Spoopendyko seized the knife
and bored away at one corner of the
box, while his wife looked on with con
siderable distress.
Handn't you bettor put a paper un
der the box? You'll get the oil all
over the table-cloth,' suggested Mrs.
.Spoopendyke.
'No, I won't either,' said Mr. .Spoop
endyke, as the knife plunged through
the box. and the oil spattered. 'Serve
you right if 1 did,' he continued, plow
ing away at the tin, while the grease
flew in all directions. 'It will teach
you to put the can opener where you
could find it. What kind of house
keeping do you call this, anyhow?' he
yelled, as the blade slipped out and
closed up on his fingers.
'Did you hurt yourself, dear?' asked
Mrs. Spoopendyke, anxiously.
'No, I didn't hurt myself!' grinned
Mr. Spoopendyke. 'The dog-gasted
knife struck a bone, or 1 would have
beeu dead with agony an kjonr ago.
Give me some ether!' lie howled.
'Fetch me some chloroform! S'pose
I'm going to saw at this box atiy more
without an esthetic? Got an idea
'Ira going to chop off a couple of dozen
fingers without something to deaden
the pain? Whore's the luughing gas?
(Hve me some laughing gas while I
extract these measly old fish,' and Mr.
Spoopendyke pranced around the
room, and then jabbed the knife into
she box again, and ripped away as
though ho wa3 run by steam. 'No use
!.o hide away from me!' he yelled,
hacking away at the box with all his
might. '1 know you're in there, and
there can't bo any dod-gasted sardine
that ever was built get away from me.
Come out, I tell ye!' and he seized a
5sh by the tail and slung him across
the room. 'You're transacting business
with Spoopendyko now!' aiuf he clawed
out a handful of mashed sardines and
s'apped them down on a plate.
'Won't you spoil 'em, dear?' asked
Mrs. Spoopendyke, dodging the flying
heads and tails. 'They won't be very
good if you open them that way.'
'Oh, won't they?' howled Mr. Spoo
pendpke. 'If you don't like 'em that
way, what'd you ask for them for?
Maybe you want to take them out in a
baby carriage. P'raps you've got an
idea I ought to climb under 'em and
!(ft'eni;out. Maybe you want me to
git into, that box with a boat and take
them out with a seine? Well, I won't,
I tell ye! . Give me the tongs; I want
fcbat; fjsh at the bottom. Where's the
tongs? Gone to get married to the
n-opener, haven't they?' and Mr.
Hpoopendyke grabbed another fish,
and fired him into the grate.
'Be patient, my dear,' said Mrs.
Spoopendyke, soothingly. 'Make the
opening a little wider, and they'll
come out.'
. 'Ain't I patient?' shouted Mr. Spoo
jiendyke. -P'raps you want me to
ning to 'em, '1 wish I was an angel,
and with the ' dod-gast the fish!
Come out of that!' and with a wrench
Mr. Spoopendyke hauled off the top
sud disclosed the mangled remains of
his enemies. 'Now, give me a lemon,'
and he eyed the repast with anything
hut contentment. 'Stir around and
'jt me a lemon; quick, now.'
'Upon my word, my dear, I don't
relieve there's a lemon in the house,'
.itammered Mrs. Spoopendyke. !
had one '
'Oh, you had one!'. proclaimed Mr.
Hpoopendyke, 'only you're just out.
If you'd beeu brought up right, you'd
wly need an awning and a family on
tho top floor to be a grocery shop.
S'pose I'm going to eat these sardines
:iw? Think I'm going to swallow
Anno fish alive? Gimme something to
put on 'ein, will ye?'
'What would you like, my dear?'
queried Mrs. Spoopendyke.
'Ink, dod-gast it! Fetch me some
jneasly ink! Got any nails? Can't
you find some laudnum somewhere?'
-ind Mr. Spoopendyke projected him
aelf into the closet and pranced out
with a bottle or arnica. 'There!' lis
Itowlcd, as he dashod the contonts over
tho sardines, 'there's vour fish all
ready for you, and the next time you
want me to open the things, you'll have
iajjfon, will ye.' i ind a can-opener,
wont ye?' and Mr. Spoependyko flopped
into his easy chair and picked up the
paper.
'Don't you want some of the fish?'
asked Mrs. Spoopendyko, after a long
pause.
'No, "I don't!' growled Mr. Spoo
sendyke.
'But this is a fresh box,' said Mrs.
Spoopendyke, displaying tho sardines
;;n neat layers.
'How'd you get it open?' demanded
Mr. Spoopendyke.
'With -the can-opener,' replied his
wife. 'I found it in your tool-hax,
litre you put it to sharpen ;U"
Myb 1 put thj lemon in ihera U
sharpen that, too,' grunted Mr. Spoop
rn.iyke, pegging wy at the box and
looking up with bis mouth full, but
rocognizing tho taste f vinegar he
uiad otne remarks about some -ople
ctMiug only a bundle and a cork to bo
a forttiuatu. jug. and laving finisked
the lot. he demunded why bis wife
handn't a.-ked for them if she wanted
sonit. and went to lied with some inco
herent observations on the alwurJity
of folks sitting around like martyrs
with fish within reach.
THE END OF THE WORLD.
A Man nho Wishes lobe in at the Grand
Uind-lp.
IVlrtfutaUty Kch-rpiiar.)
Say, what is there in this talk about
Old Mother What-you-call-her, the
conjugation of the planets, and the
world oomin' to an end this year?'
asked a grizzled old 49er, stopping
Professer Legate as he was turning tho
corner of C and Union streets with a
big teloscopo under his left arm. 'Do
you think the old world is going to
pass in her checks?'
,W(:1I said tho Professor, 'we will
certainly have during this year some
remarkable movements in the princi
pal planets.'
'Anything liable to bust loose very
soon?'
'Beforo long. Let me see at nine
o clocK ou tne nignt ot April 21,
Saturn will be in conjunction with the
sun.
'Good for a starter! What next?'
'At seven o'clock the next morning.
Saturn and Jupiter will be in conjunc
tion.' 'Bully! That's business!'
At nine o'clock that morning Jupi
ter will come into conjunction with the
sun.
'Hurrah! All getting their work
on the sun. I can see Old Sol begin
ning to get shaky on his pins. What
next?'
'On the '2d of May, Venus comes in
to conjunction with the sun."
'Glory! The old gal gets 111 her
lick on the sun, too. It's a-gettin' hot
now. Hit him again, old gal.
'On the 11th of Mav, Neptune will
be in conjunction with tho sun.'
'Tip-top; old Nep. and all 01 em go
ing square at the sun, like so many but
ting billy-goats. I'll live to see it yet.
Who goes at him next?'
'On the 14th oi May, -Mercury comes
into conjunction with tho sun, and
U ranus will bo at the right angles.
'My what will be at right angles?
'Uranus.'
'Thunder! Then I'll be in at the
grand bust-up, sure. Is that all'''
'Those will be tne principal occur
rences.
'And quite sufficient, too. They'll
fetch the old craft they'll knock the
14 world off her pins. I'm much
obliged, professor. I'm ready to peg
out any minute if I can see tho big
show see the old world blow up in a
blaze of glory, like a big firework.
Do you know I've allers wanted to see
this very business. Why, it will pay
me for all the misery I've had in livin'
up to dato. I'll be up bright and early
on the morning of the 14th of May, to
see old Merkry git in tho last at the
sun and bust up all creatiou. I'm
really much obliged, and I'll drink
with, yer, professor, ef you've got a
slick quarter about yer clothes if
you have itt then we'll soak yer old
telescope. '
Sol. Millar, of the Troy (Kansas)
Chief, explains it in the following:
'There are several causes for the de
cay of the country press. The greatest
is the superior faculties and the im
mense subscription lists of tho large
city weeklies, by which large sheets,
containing vast amounts of leading
matter, are sent for 1 and $1 50 a
year; and this is aided bv the penu-
nousness and want of consideration of
subscribers to county papers. Not a
day passes but the publisher of the
county paper is badgered and impor
tuned to let his paper go for SI or
$1 50 a year, because suck and such
big city papers, containing three or
four times as much reading, is sent for
that price. I hose subscribers do not
consider that tho country publisher
has to depend solely upon his earnings
from week to week, while the city pa
per, owned by wealthy stock companies,
printed bv steam, and possessing all
the best advantages, cfiii afford tho pa
per, all the matter in which has al
ready been paid for in a daily paper,
at a very low figure. . The same over
whelming power of capital has crushed
out the shoemaker, and other trades.
It is crushing out the farmer in Tmi
gland and Ireland, and will do it here
in course of time. The farmer who
attempts to beat down the prices of a
country publisher, does not reilect that
the same thing is last coming Home to
him. He is already helpless in the
matter of transportation.
The thing that every citizen of a
county is most deeply interested in, is
tho affairs of his own county. The
cheap city paper gives him nothing of
this, but the only place to find it is in
the county paper. If they break down
the county paper by forcing into com
petition with the city papers, wheso
matter has been printed over and over,
and paid for several times beforo it
goes into tho weekly, how are they to
keep informed upon their home affairs?'
Time, 4$ Honrs.
My son had a badly swelled neck, and
a soro throat. Dr. Thomas' Eclectric
Oil cured him in 4H hours. My wife's
foot was much inflamed; . Eclectric Oil
cured her in one day. For sale by J, C.
Saur. I. B. bloomer, Virgil, N. Y,
MiEAk WIMIOY.
4 What in your :fe particular lit
llo game?' aakeJ a friend of a hen
pecked husband. "When the gets
throrouchly inn I, it a draw poker."
llr,Kll if h Kagu.
It slid that George llidille intends
to Mary Anderson. What George
intentions are do not amount to so
much as long a Mary 'a are a Kiddie.
A'. V. Slur.
Wiu-n a maiden gets too old a catch
a husband she takes to the platform
and goes around lecturing on "What
shall we do with our daughters?"
PhilivMphi'i Xrirs.
'Louisville has a humorous weekly
cal'ed Strnwi.'' It is edited by Mos
es Oats, tho weather prophet? Hay?
Well, we hope the editor will make
his lodder out of it. Xom'.ituwn Her
aid. "You tongue tco much," said the
bruised horses to the heavily loaded
wagon. ''Wheel do th best we can;'
wus tho reply. 'Then lets wag-on,"
said the tongue.- -Springjidil Xew.s.
"Yes, said the school girl who had
risen from the lowest to the highest
position in her class; "I shall have a
horse shoe for my symbol, as it in
notes having come from the foot!
Yonhcr.1 Slutiiman.
Ma,' said young impudence at the
breakfast table this morning,' 'this is
the last pie you made, isn't it''' -Yes,
my sn, why?' 'I guess you had to
paint the stuffing in with a brush; it's
awful thin.' Sentenced to go pieless
until he can cultivate a proper spirit of
appreciation.
Sweet Pens in Hanging Baskets.
Sweet peas in hanging baskets sus
pended in the window are very beauti
ful objects. Their trailing stems and
bright foliage fall very gracefully on
all sides, and are of themselves very
pretty, and when tho (lowers appear
tho effect is elegant. To have them
bloom in summer and fall, the seed
should be sown now in pots, and then
be placed in a warm window or a fram.
A correspondent in (iunlcnimj Illus
trated recommends sowing in four inch
pots about twenty peas in each pot.
V hen the voting seedings are well up,
and require more room they must be
transferred to the baskets, three or
more pots in each, according to the
size of tho basket, which should be
lined with green moss. Light rich
soil is necessary. While the peas are
growing, liquid manuro should be
freely used, and the baskets should be
hung near the glass. This will stimu
late growth and early bloom. The
variety of color and the sweet odor of
the flowers make them desirable.
Among the most desirable varieties
are the painted lady, violet queen,
(Japt. Clark, tricolor, light blue and
purple, black purple, Btriped and in
vincible scarlet.
How a Snake Moves.
A snake when on the ground moves
often with considerable rapidity. The
head is slightly raised, and the body and
tail progress by means of the peculiar
grasping power of the skin and ribs of the
underneath parst, which enables conse
cutive contraction and elongation to oc
cur. The movement is more or less flat
with the earth, and the snake never coils
upward, as is often figured in old and
new paintings and engravings. It can
erect its head and-much of the neck and
foro part of the body, and this is also
done when the creature is in horizontal
coils, and quiescent. On moving up a
stone or tree the head, neck and much of
of the body may be placed against the
more or less vertical object, nd a small
protion only of the body may be left on
the ground, but in this position the snake
is liable to fall sideways. On moving up
a tree they do not coil themselves round
and round it like a rope, but they may do
this when still. It is wonderful how snakes
move along and between boughs, and,
taking a turn round one with their tail
end, swing and look for food, and also
how they will make themselves up into a
bunch on a fork of a tree, and remains
there without falling. They swim in an
undulating manner, but the body is
wriggled on tho same plane as the sur
face of the water, and not at right an
gles to it, but in rushing at their prey,
both in the water and on land, there is
more or less upward or downward bend
ing of part of the body, and a rapid thrust
of the head forward, .
HUMORS OF THE DAY,
Tho soft corn is hard enough to bear.
Domestic dispatch .Johnny with the
hot buckwheat.
The greatest mashers turn out the
smallest potatoes.
"You will love only me, George, dar
ling?" "Sometimes," he says.
When a New York young man pops
the question he says: "Let's conRoli
date. The New York Aeir declares that "it
was a farseeing chap who invented the
telescope."
The "Ironclad Oath" is when a fellow
reclines on the zenith end of a tack with
his bare foot.
In New England they are making rum
from qld shoes. One drink of it starts
the flow of solo.
If we were a girl we would select a
lover from among tailors for they ali
know how to press a suit.
The lazy boy fears that if he once be
gins to earn his own living ho will be al
ways expected to do it.
The original poem read by Bjornsterne
Bjournson, just before he begins his
Irt-turw i Tuiggwaaeon
it, :
Uuibollard. must candid of Philoao
phvra, rvmarks: "Would that I had ten
tliou&atiil a year." '-To do what?" To
do nothing."
A man' rvsiili-eiRV, in law, i when
he lias bin washing done. We pity LMndt
men. Poor devils, to have no home.
Short coiirtiiig: ' Rachel, the Lord
hathtfiit me to marry thee, "mi id the
suitor. 'The Lord's will be done," watt
the KubmUuiivn reply.
Policeman ''Now, then, move on!
There'a nothing the matter here." Sar
castic Boy "Of course there isn't. If
there was you wouldn't be here."
A London wifu cannot blow up her
husband without the people in the next
house rushing out to inform the authori
ties that they have discovered a Fenian
plot.
The Baltimore Custom-house ofliciuls
claim that they can tell a smuggler in
six different wnyc. After he hasTbpeti
told in one wny, what good do the other
five do?
His text W44, "What doest Jthou here,
Elijah?" He divided it into two heads.
"First, m brethern,"j said he, "let us
consider what Elijah did; hear; and, sec
ondly, what he didn't hear."
Notwithstanding the fact (and perhaps I
in consequence of it) that the clercrv and
justicesjof the peace are so busy all the
time making two people one, the popula
tion continues to increase.
They catch rats with baited Jfislinooks
in New York. We suppose ft is an art-ist-hook-rat-ic
amusement. (Last lot of
this kind, and going ,off like smoke at a
dollar a dozen. Orders bymail promptly
attended to.) Burlington Hawkeye.
At a restaurant Gentleman to waiter
passing "Will you kindly tell me the
hour':" "Excuse me, I am not waiting
upon you; please ask the waiter of your
section," he replies, and seeing th"esameT
says: "Tell this gentleman, JohnrwiIat
time it is."
A gentleman was complaining on
'Change that iie had invested a rather
large sum of money in Wall street and
lost it all. A sympathizing friend asked
him whether he had been a "bull" or a
"bear, " to which he replied: "Neither:
I was a jackass." Chicago Tribune,
"Unhappily married? I should think
I was!" cried the burlesque actress.
"Why, he doesn't beat me, doesn't come
home drunk, doesn't squander my Jearn
ings! I haven't the slightestjexcuso for
getting a divorce, and I'm afraid I shall
never make a name in the world. "
.say, bov! say," exclaimed a hot
looking man with a valise, "what is the
quickest way to get to the cars!" "Run."
yelled the boy; and the hot-looking man
was so pleased with the information that,
if he could have got near to the boy he
would have given him something.
A youngster steps up to a gentleman in
the park: "Sir, won't you please go
after my boat, which is going to fall in
to the stream?'' "But do you wish me
to throw myseif into the water, !child?"
"Oh, yes, mamma said, 'ask that gentle
man; he looks fool enough to do it."
There are a good many things in this
world to make a man mad. The young
man who kindly stopped to assist a blind
man afterwards found that the girl who
was looking at him from the window of
the house was the housemaid, and not
the daughter and heiress of the proprie
tor. An Indian Boy's Love Letter.
A love-letter picked up on the floor
of a school with Hampton's views on co
education need not inevitably shock
even pedagogic sensibilities. Written in
unknown tongue, however, with only
the names to betray it, a translation by
the private interpreter seemed only a
proper precaution. If I confide it to the
gentle reader, the Indian lovers will
be neither the worse nor the wiser, while
some others may find in it valuable sug
gestions for similar correspondence.
"Norma I, School, February 3, 1879.
"Miss : I said I like you, and I
want to give you a letter. Whenever I
give you letter, I want you answer to me
soon. That's all I want, and I will ans
wer to you soon after. When you give
me letter, it raises me up. It makes me
heart-glad, sktcr-in-lair. When I talk, I
am not saying anything foolish. Al
ways my heart very glad. I want you
let me know your thought. I always
like you and love you. Iam honest about
what I say, I always keep in mind. I
wiiiil always we smile nt each other
when meet. We live happy always. I
think that's best way, and you think
it is and let mo know. And I want to
say one thingdon't say anything to
Henry. I don't think that's right. And
I say again, when I give a letter, keep
nicely and not show to any one. If they
know it, it not good way. They take us
away, and that is the reason don't show
it. Hear me, this all I am going to say.
I like you, and I love you. I won't say
any more, ilf whole heart is shaking
hand irith .yon. I kiss you.
Your lover.
" n ?l
Helen W. Ludlow, in Harper Maga
zine for April.
Prostrated.
Jabeah Snow, Gunning Cove. N. S.,
writes: '.'I was completely prostrated
with the Asthma, but hearing of Dr.
Thomas' Eclectric Oil, I procured a bot
tle, and it did me so much good, that I
got another, and before it was used I
was cured. My son was cured of a bad
cold by the use of half a bottle, It goes
like wildfire, and cures wherever it is
used." For sale by J. C. Saur.
- Tha,.o,orrMP3 LYE1A piHKHAM.
OF LYNN, MASS.
i, .
DlKOVIRCB OP
LYDIA E. PINKHAM'S
VSSETAELE COMPOUND.
For all Female Complaints.
Tlita prefwrattcn, m iU Mm r1ralfla, onstfti of
Vegetable Propcrtivi Uiat are tannic to the moat del
kale lnraild. Upon ono trial the merit of this Cora
pound wilt be reeogniiod, a relief to Immediate j and
when Ha ate to continuod, in ninety -nine cases in a hun.
dred,apennanentcurBiieffcctcd,asthottmnd wilt tes
tify. On account of it ftroren merit, It is to-day re
commended and prescribed by the best nhyakian in
the country.
It will core entirely the worst form of filling
of the uterus, Leucorrhcnt, Irregular and painful
Menstruation, all Orarian Troubles, Inflammation and
Ulceration, Flooding, all Displacements and the con
sequent spinal weakness, and la especially adapted to
the Change of Life. It will dlasolra and expel tumors
from the aterus in an early stage of derelopment. The
tendency to cancerous humors there Is chocked vtry
speedily by its uae.
In fact It hat prorrd to be the great
est and best remedy that ha ercr been discover
ed. It permeates every portion of tho system, and give
new life and vigor. It removes f alntnen,flatulcncy, do
ttroy all craving for stimulants, and relieve weakness
of the stomach
It cures Bloating, Headaches, Xerrous Prostration,
General Debility, Sleeplessness, Depression and Indi
gestion. That feeling of bearing down, causing pain,
weight and backache, to always permanently cured by
Us ue. It will at all times, and under all circunutan
ees, art In harmony with tbe law that governs the
female system.
For Kidney Complaints of either ex this compound
Is unsurpassed.
Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound
Is prepared at 235 and 235 Western Avenue, l.ynn. Mass,
Trice $1.00. Six bottles for $5.00. Sent by mail in the
form of pills, also In the form of Lozenges, on receipt
of price, Ci-00, per box, for cither. Mrs. PINK a Ail
freely answors all letters of inquiry. Send for pam
ulilet. Address ns above Mention this paper.
No family should be without LYDIA E. PINK HAM
LIVE It PILLS. They cure Constipation, XMiousncus,
id Torpidity ot the liver. 5 cents per box.
HTKOMi, COBB & CO., ."MTi!l Ajreute,
For Sale by 1. .1. Humphrey, Nai o'eou. Ohio.
septl6-ly Cleveland.
A Compound Tincture of the most valu
able remedies known to the medical
profession, prepared upon strictly
pharmaceutical principles
An experience of twenty-five years proves it to be
the greatest Antidote to Malaria and all other Ague
influences known to the world. ,
The only tbtolut cure for all Affection! of the)
Kidneys. In Liver Complnint nyKpeimia
all Disorders of the Bowelm anU ah Aflec
tiona of the Throat and luugn ft i tgvalty
erficacioui, while as a remedy for cumolaiuts peculiar
to the femule sex it has no equal
NOT A BEVERACE
Bui an old reliable tfousehold Remedy,
thoroughly adapted to assist nature.
It Bnppnes tone to the stomach, reinvigorates the
digestive organs, stimulate the secretions, and pro.
moting a regular action of the bowels, enables every
organ of the body to perfmn it allotted work ragu
larly and without interruption.
Its highest commendation come from tbrwe riho
have used it longest and known it bert.
Nowhere so popular as in Lam-aster, Pa.,lK-rp lo
has been in use for more than a quarter of a emtury.
Highly com tneo tied as a (General Twite
aud Appetizer Sold by Druggists everywhere.
THE MESSENGER OF HEALTH
A large sized paper descriptive of disease, its oHkki
and cure, will be mailed free to any oddresM on
application to
THE MISHLER HERB BITTERS CO.
Lancaster, Pa.
X itrrmgly recommend to mothers Prof,
l'arker's Pleannnt Worm (Syrup. It never
&u, ifi easy to take, imd do altTHuyiWo i. miuirod.
Prtoe, 25 ecau.
july, 1-lyr.
Profitable Reading for Everybody
I Business men & women, teachers, mechanics.'
farmcrs, ministers, moi ficrs, aud all who arc CrcC.
jjV.orTt drink intoxicating. Mrtcrs, but: use
, Aic you saiienus i;v;n lyspc;si:i, Jxhcu:a.i
usm, Iseurateia.or with Rowel. Kitlnevor Livei
ruiiiiainrs, you can ae ciireu vy xi
If YOU are WU&till'? aw-V with i'lnntmnnri.
Female Weakness or anv sickness ; if von h.ive r.
,bad coutrh orcohl; you will find sure relief in
If vouare enfeebled bv dissase. ace or dissi
pation, and your system needs invigorating, or,
if you have pimples and blotches, andyourblood
'needs purifying, you can always depend on
Made from Ginger, Buchu, Mandrake, Stillin-
the Best Health & Strength Restorer Evorjj
Used far superior to Litters. Essences of Gin J
;-cr and other Tonics, as it nevor intoxicates,
!nd combines the best curative properties of all. J
it lias barea iiunareus or litres; It Hay 3
Save Yours. 2
Buy a sac, bottle of vour druczist. and to avoid!
counterfeits be sure our signature is on the out-f
side wrapper. Hrscox & Co.. Chemist. N. Y.l
Parker's Hair Baisam, KSiKS-
The Best Jlost Economical Ilnir DreflBln?
Containing only ingredients that nre beneficial
to the hair and scalp, the Hals AM will be found
far more satisfactory than any other preparation.
It Never Fails to Restore Gray cr Failed Hair
to the original youthful color and is warranted to
remove dandruff, prevent baldness and promote a
growth of young hair. Sold by druggists at 50 ct
QUJC1CLY CURED BY
CARTER'S
eed
gjagBBiK3iEraEsa 1 11 1111m 1
-AND-
adorma
GtAcIiB Plasters!
These ptetcra contain Smart Weed and Bella
donnaboth wonderful pain relievers in addi
tion to the usual Rums, balsams, &c, used in other
porous piaster.', r.r.'.l are consequently superior to
all others ior Weak or Lama Back. Back
rM, Eheuniatism, "Neura,rs?la, Soreness
of the Chest or Luusjb. Aatlima. Plourisy,
Kidney Troubles, Crick in the Back, Stiff-'
ness 01 tho Jolnta, tintrfor alfPatasand
Aches, and wherever a Piaster can be
used. If you have any need for a Porous
Strengthening Plaster, we know this one will
please you. It is sure to Rive relief, aud p.iin can
not exist where it is applied.
Ask your druggist for Carter's Smart Weed and
Belladonna Back Ache Plasters. Price, oj cents.
CARTER MEDICINE CO., New York.
aplM-lT
K ACHE
I CENTS WNTtOt-"ll.F
1 . lulMi
7V wr
K. i d.) M fca M mmir. rati-
IMTPVTs '. XI-1 i iirliar el
1 I..' I iwuik, Ci; . ih HtM or
.V.', Wtillktun, 1. C. Jiolr m)l lrrd t:ulr
!ml nt U oMajurd. Krud fur cmttUr ttttiiff t. rm
ftr. CUbtuhrd :t:u. vdjltf
GOLD.:
Om( chaixrto Bikr wunry. We
hotI pHNn In run fertrti lolftkr
iitMTniiCtofi IftrtlarUnmt.rfemi-
and brt llltwin.ltd fawil)- pub-
utmiioa ui the voruu AuMu. rait
brcoui aucavaful.gt m tt, ctiil vt ika of art
invru frrr Ui autwrnlwm 1r ytUr la o low thai
aimuatrrrruodr atiuarrilw. our airrul n-ioruj tk
UNC In aulorrfLrra in day. A lailjr aynil
n-imn makiuf ovrr fan rk.r iirort in trn
da) a. All wbotiigaiir niaa tnout taat. You rati
dvtotr- allrourtluH to the bualtieaa, urmitj your rr
timr. Vou nrrd tint biaii from konw u'rr uMtht.
Yourandoltiavrllu ollina. rV.II illrniloii. tad
term frrx. Kkmnt .lid -i-iii.ve tmu.t Inc. If
rM waul profitable work arm! iia jour aciiiirw al onor.
It coata iiuttiluK try the butliirn, Noourwho i
tara fail, to male a irrrat pay. AiMnaa OaoaoK
KTiHaox it Co., Portland. Maine. JIM.Ilyr
BEST;
tmal'imnow brfcre thr public
Yon can n'.ake ruonrjr faster at
work for 11a thin al au thin elar
Capital not required. V e will atari
JTou. SI'i a day anil upwards made
at uome ny me lu!ii!rrmua. Meu,
women, boya aud Rlrla wanted every ken to work for
11a. Now la the time. You i-au devot? you whole
time to the work, or only your apare bhnumiI. No
olhrr biwiueaiwill pay jou nearly aa well. No enr
willliiKtowurkcau fail to make cnorniona pt by eu
tnuinat once. Cotly Outfit and teruia free. A
KTat opportunity for mkliit money eauily and
honoRtlily. AiMrtna Tni; Co., Auguala. Maine. 1
PT,e,!nnc Tfo"" t aoldien. and their
C-iiOiUliO. heirs entitled by lain lawa or Cou
jrea. r:id two tttatnlm for laws, and r p of Citizen
Soldier, Ui N. V. r'itzuerald, IT. R. c'alin'Atl'T, Bos
vut, Vi'anhlnKton, U. '. oel'.'ltf
THE CREAT
BUIiLIXGTOX IiOVTE.
ISTNo other lino runs Three Through Pas
senger Trains Daily between t'hieuKo, Den
Moines, Council Uliiffs, Umuliit, Lincoln, St.
Joseph, Atchison, Topekn anil Kansas City.
Direct connection! for nil points in Kansas,
Nebraska, (,'oloralo, Wyominir. Montana, Ne
vada, New Mexico, Arizona, Idaho, Oregon and
California.
Tho Shortest. Speediest and Most Comforta
ble Home viatlannibi.i to Fort Seott, Denison,
Dallas, Houston, Austin, riau Antonio, Galves
ton and all points in Texas.
The uneiualcU inducements offered by this
Line to Travelers and Tourists, ure as follows:
The celebrated Pullman (lfi-wheel) Palace
Sleeping Curs, run only on this Line, C, It. &
Q. Puluco Drawing-Koom Cars, with Morton's
Reclining Chairs. No extra charge for Seats
in Reclining Chairs. The famous C. B. & Q.
Palace Dining Cars, dorgcous Smoking Cars
fitted with Elegant lligh-Iiackcd Rattan Re
volving Chairs for the exclusive use of flrBt
class pussengers.
Steel Truck and Superior Equipment, com
bined with their Great Through Car Arrange
ment, makes this, above all others, the favorite
Route to .the South, South-We,s$. auU..U)e JFar
West. . ,
Try it, and you will find traveling; a luxury
instead of a discomfort. i
Through Tickets via this Celebrated Line
for sale at all oltices in the United States and
Canada.
All information about Rates of Fare, Sleep,
ing Car Accommodations, Time Tables, &c
will be cheerfully given by applying to
JAMES R. WOOD,
General Passenger Agent, Chicago
T. J. POTTER,
General Manager, Chicago.
CD W
CD
0
h3
0
S-n
3
a
CD
o a
o
ci m p
1R
rn lJ. s ifm
H rl Hm n rv -
15 afV L f 1 1 I-" -5 '
lj vr i-v u m n
ft I ttmr v V 1 I
oil
?0 CD
v tr -a. UJ
rn Cim P rn
4 OX o
3a,
1 1
CD
"-1
CD
Oh y O
Zi
f-t-
.Zi 1
2
0
T
CD
1 Ui
t-1
ct- 0
-k rr r-j f-j. v j
a P
ft. STOVE PIPE SHELF
miaf w W winiivi
AOMSXTS WANTED for tli
1 most coiivunleDt article ever offprnd
lo housckoepcis. Agents meet with
renter Hiiccess than ever. One iwenf;
madeSiana in in davfl. ftnfhftr ttHK
In ft rlnvia nnnthej f$27 in 1 day. - Box luff Knit
Frt'Etflit Free to Asrvntn. RcTiii for ciroulaut
uuartat lUldrc:. J, aiEPARI A CO.,
Ciurlniintl, or St. .Lou It, Jlfo,
Peter Henderson's
COMBINED CATALOGUE OF
Will be Mailed free in all who apply by
Miter.
Onr Experimental Gronntls fn
which we tcMt our Vesetnblo and
Flower .Seeds nre most complete
and our OrccnliouHCM lor Plant,
(eovcrlns 3 aeres In class), are
the lurfost In A inerica.
PETER HENDERSON & CO.
33 Corilandt Street, New York.
Aircnta Wuntrd. .Haltarnine
a lllnirour 1'I.ATFOItM a'AMlLf
HCl,K.WelBhniiTi loUr.lt Uotall
prlun. ijlf.tie. 't'orQiSFiirrrisoAaeHta
buusriu ricALt Co., t 'tiiciiuiail, 0.
1m iSJM