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THE HAYS FREE PRESS TURKS SINK THREE OF ALLIED FLEET Two British and One French Warship Strike Floating Mines in Dardanelles. v HARD FIGHT IN THE HARROWS Land Forts Rain Terriffic Fire on Ten Battleships and Lighter Craft Russian Squadron Near Bosphorus. , London, March 20. The British bat tleships Irresistible and Ocean and the French battleship Bouvet were blown up by floating mines while engaged "with the remainder of the allied fleet in attatcking the forts in The Narrows of the Dardanelles Thursday. Nearly all members of the crews of the two British ships were saved, having been transferred to other ships under a hot fire, but an internal explo sion took place on -board the Bouvet after she had fouled the mine and most of her crew wras lost. The Bouvet sank within three minutes of the time that she hit the mine. Set Mines Adrift. The waters in which the ships were lost had been swept of mines, but the British admiralty asserts that the Turks and the Germany set floating containers of explosives adrift and these were carried down by the cur Tent to the allied ships gathered inside the entrance of the straits. All the ships that were sunk were -old ones, the Bouvet having been com pleted nearly twenty years ago and the Ocean and Irresistible in 1900. The sunken British ships are being re placed by the battleships Queen and Implacable, vessels of a similar type. They are said to have started some .time ago for near Eastern waters ,in anticipation of just such losses as have now occurred. Two Other Ships Damaged. Two other ships engaged in the fight ing, the British battle cruiser Inflexi ble and the French battleship Gaulois, were hit by shells and damaged. The British casualties, according to the British official report, were not heavy. The damage done to the Turkish forts by the heavy bombardment has not yet been ascertained. It is stated that the operations against them are continuing. Russians Approach Bosphorus. "It is officially confirmed that a Rus sian squadron lias approached the northern part of the Bosphorus," says Reuter's Petrograd correspondent. "The appearance of the squadron has caused a great panic in Constanti nople." CHEAPER EGGS PREDICTED Spring Buying Will Be Restricted By Lack of Cold Storage Room, Produce Men Say. Chicago, March 20. A scarcity of cold storage room will result in mak ing lower prices for eggs, 'butter and poultry this spring and higher prices next fall and winter, produce men here declare. Cold storage warehouses have un usually large quantities of meats and apples for this time of year and this accounts for the scarcity of room. The stocks of hog products in Chicago warehouses at the beginning of this month were 34 per cent larger than a .year ago, and owners of apples put in storage last fall have not been able to market them as extensively as they expected. The same conditions are said to exist in other cities. The purchase of eggs, butter and poultry in April, May and June, when they are most plentiful, to hold for the fall and winter trade,, when produc tion is least, serves to hold spring prices up and winter prices down in ordinary years, but storage this year will be less than usual, produce men say, unless some of the cold storage room now in use is vacated soon. GIVE UP HUNT FOR INDIANS Denver, March 20. The posse of federal deputies under United States Marshal Nebeker at Bluff, Utah, which for more than a month has been at tempting to arrest Tse-Ne-Gat, a Piute Indian wanted by the federal authori ties on a charge of murder, has been, ordered home, according to a dispatch from Bluff. "Old Folk," father of Tse-Ne-Gat, and a large party of renegade Indians, have for several weeks . been aiding the fugitive in resisting arrest. No reference .is made in the dispatch to the activities or present whereabouts of General Scott, chief of staff of the army, who arrived in the Bluff district recently to attempt to pacify the recal citrant Piutes. Germans Topedo Two Ships. London, March 20. Two more Brit ish steamers have been topedoed by German submarines. The Glasgow steamer Hyndford was torpedoed in the "channel Tuesday. The Cardiff steamer Blue Jacket was also attack ed and sunk without warning. Navy Desertions Falling Off. Washington, March 20. Desertions from the three battleship fleets of the American Navy in December, 1914, totaled cnly ninety, according to the Navy Department. Champ Clark to Gulf Resort. Washington, March 20. Speaker Champ Clark left today for his home at Bowling Green, by way of Pass Christian, Miss., the gulf resort where President Wilson spent a short vaca tion more than a year ago. Latins Buy Money Here. Philadelphia, March 20. There was shippei from; the United States mint today a package contatining 4,700,000 nickel coins made for the government cf San Salvador. DENIES FREEDOM TO THAW Ordered Sent Back to Matteawan by Justice Page Saved by Habeas Corpus Writ. New York, March 17. Another long legal battle oyer Harry Thaw was made certain yesterday when Justice Page in the supreme, follow ing Thaw's acquittal Saturday of the charge of conspiring to escape from Matteawan, ordered Thaw returned to the hospital for the criminal insane tinder the original commitment from Justice Dowling. Thaw had demanded that he be re turned to New Hampshire, from which state he was extradited for trial on the conspiracy charge. Losing there, he won on another point, however, when his counsel,, anticipating an ad verse decision by Justice Page, ob tained from Justice Bijur of the su preme court a writ of habeas corpus, returnable Friday. Meantime Thaw must be kept in the Tombs prison. It was a close call for Thaw, since plans had been considered by the state for returning him at cnce to his long time residence at Matteawan. Asylum attendants were in the court room ready to rush him there by mo tor car the moment the motion for a return to New Hampshire was denied. But the writ of habeas corpus served half an hour before on Warden Han ley of the Tombs prevented this. HE SAVED VALUABLE JEWELS Catholic Priest Arrives in New York From City of Mexico With Priceless Gems. New York, March 17. A king's ran som in jewels, blazoned in the royal eagles of Spain at the time of Charles V, the most powerful monarch of the Sixteenth century, lies under guard at the customs house here awaiting appraisal. The gems, set in gold on white and purple robes and mounted on two gold en crowns, were brought into New York by a Catholic priest, clad in shabby clothes, who fled from the City of Mexico a month ago, made his way to Vera Cruz and sailed aboard the Steamer 'Montevideo. The Montevi deo reached New York March G with this priest and six other fugitive priests who had been banished from Mexico by General Obregon. From the depths of a battered suit case the gems and robes were tum bled out upon the dock for inspection by the customs authorities. They so dazzled the inspectors that they were hastily put back into the suitcase. Un der guard they were taken to a safe deposit vault, where they were locked up and special watchmen detailed to guard them. Rough estimates placed their value as high as $500,000. LIBERTY BELL IS IN DANGER Half of the Famous Old Revolution, ary Relic Hangs Only by a Slender Support. Philadelphia, March 18. "The Lib erty Bell is suffering' from an incur able organic disease. The crack which originally was confined to its side has run along its shoulder so that half the bell hangs only by a slim support. The crack has grown an inch and a quarter within the last eight years." This is the substance of an asser tion made at the Union League by Wilfred Jordan, curator of Independ ence Hall, who lectured under the au spices of the Numismatic and Anti quarian Society of Philadelphia. "And despite a peition two and a half miles long from the school chil dren of California," Mr. Jordan add ed, "the bell's physical disability should prevent our sending it to San Francisco." FRYE SAILORS VOLUNTEERS Newport News, Va., March 18. Charles Frank and Robert Roggs, for mer members of the crew of the American sailing ship William P. Frye, and now alleged to be detained on the cruiser Prinz Eitel Friedrich for military service, yesterday made -a sworn statement denying they were being held against their will. The men yesterday appeared at the customs house in the uniform of the German navy and informed the deputy collector of customs, M. M. -Vipond, they considered themselves subject tp military duty under the German flag and were willing to perform that serv ice. Monkey Maimed a Boy. Los Angeles, March 18. Suits for 571,500 damages have been filed against E. W. Knowlton of Pasadena, owner of an educated chimpanzee. Mr. and Mrs. O. P. Lindley allege that the animal escaped March 17, 1914, from the Knowlton home, traveled two miles, entered their home and threw their son Milton, 10 years eld, against a bed, disabling him for life. Wilson Into Ohio Mine Strike. Washington, March 17. President Wilson yesterday began preparing a proposal of arbitration to settle the Eastern Ohio coal strike. He will communicate it to the operators and miner's leaders in- letters probably tomorrow. Nineteen on Dresden Lest. Valparaiso, Chile, March 17. Nine teen members of the crew of the Ger man cruiser Dresden, sunk off . Juan Fernandez Island Sunday by British warships, are missing. Bernhardt Is Doing Well. Bordeau, March 17. A bulletin is sued by Dr. Denuce and Dr. Arno zan after visiting Sarah Bernhardt, who recently left the hospital where her right leg was amputated, states that her condition is entirely, satisfac tory. Guard the Rockefeller Tcmb. Tarrytown, N. Y., March 17. Two armed guards keep watch over the body of Mrs- John D. Rockefeller, Sr in the mausoleum of John TJ. Arch bold in the Sleepy Hollow cemetery. PROTEST ON TAiiES U. S. Government Tells Villa He Has No Right to Hold Up Foreign Residents. LIVING CONDITIONS IMPROVED Rail Communication From City of Mexico to Et Paso Soon to be Opened, It is Reported. x Washington, March 19. A protest was sent by the United States today to General Villa against the collec tion from Americans or other foreign ers of part of a special tax of 1,000,000 pesos levied at Monterey. The British embassy had brought to the attention of the state department a report -just received from Monterey saying that the British-owned light and power company there had been called upon to pay $35,000 as its share of the new tax. Just how the general assessment was to be apportioned the state de partment was not informed, but the unufcrsianuing wa.3 iua.t Jjreiit;ra.i viixo, had laid an omnibus tax on the city, leaving it to the authorities there to raise the money in whatever way they saw fit. The order was dated March 16, it was said, and fifteen days wis the time given in which to raise the money. The department has protested prev iously, notably in the case of the tax which General Obregon tried to col lect in Mexico City recently, against any of the Mexican factions forcing contributions from foreigners. Gen eral Obregon heeded the protest and the tax was removed as far as foreign ers were concerned. Other advices to the department to day said living conditions in Mexico City are improved, that rail com munications to El Paso probably will be opened in four or five days, and that fighting between Carranza and Villa forces has begun near Tampico. To Aid Foreigners. . Washington, March 18. Secretary Daniels has authorized Commander Blakely of the cruiser Des Moines at Progreso, Mexico, to take aboard any Americans or other foreigners seek ing safety. The collier Brutus was or dered to Progreso from Vera Cruz to afford asylum to refugees. Consul Silliman, at Vera Cruz, has reported that General Carranza had agreed to cooperate in providing transportation for Americans and other foreigners wishing to leave Mexico City and to facilitate the trans portation of Red Cross supplies to the Mexican capital. Similar assurance of co-operation has been received from the authorities controlling Mexico City. The schooner Susie B. Dantzler of Gulf port, Miss., detained at Campeche, has arrived at Vera Cruz and her own ers advise that Captain Dethloff was not imprisoned, as had been feared. The opinion is expressed that no fur ther difficulty would be experienced by shipping in and out of Progreso and that Mexican consuls will now be em powered to clear vessels for the Yuca tan port. Foreigners Ready to Leave. Washington, March 17. Conditions in the City of Mexico as well as Man zanillo continue to give officials concern.- Apparently the re-occupation of the capital by the Zapata forces has not brought the expected relief, or else Americans have tired of their isola tion and the stagnation which their business has experienced, for a large number of them, with other foreigners, asked the State Department today, through the Brazilian minister, to ob tain transportation for them to Vera Cruz. Urgent representations were . made to General Carranza concerning his troops at Manzanillo, whose activities have been causing Americans and for eigners much apprehension. The American consul was instructed to keep in close touch with the comman der of the cruiser Cleveland should foreigners become further endangered. Fire on U. S. Boat. Galveston, Tex., March 17. The ten der of -the United States battleship Delaware was fired upon by snipers at Vera Cruz March 10, according to reports brought here today by passen gers on the Norwegian steamship City of . Tampico. The tender went into the harbor for Captain Rogers of the Delaware and was fired upon while in bound and again while returning to the warship. No one was injured. Sapulpa Residents Injured In Storm. Sapulpa, Ok., March 19. Three per sons were injured, none seriously; fences destroyed and small buildings blown over when a miniature tornado struck a residential section of Sapul pa late this afternoon. J. P. Morgan Off for Europe. New York, March 19. J. P. Mor gan and Mrs. Morgan sailed for Eu rope yesterday on the steamship Phil adelphia. Horgan declined to discuss the object of his trip abroad, but from other sources It was learned that it had no significance. Put Cargoes on Transports. Washington, March 19. Because of the lack of shipping facilities between the Philippine Islands and the United States, army transports will be util ized for carrying goods. Ask Relief for Jews in War. Chicago, March 19. A campaign to obtain $100,000 in Chicago for the re lief of Jews in the European war' zone was" begun yesterday. Three million of the 6,000,000 Jews in Poland and Galicia are homeless and starving, ac cording to the relief committee. Oklahoman Burned te Death. Sapulpa, Ok., March 19. The charred body of Daniel Black, a farm er four miles southwest of Sapulpa, was ' found G1I3 morning is tie ruins of his cabij 7,1R5. HAVILAND H. LUND Mrs. Lund is head of the National forward to the Land Movement, the object of which is to take care of the army of unemployed. The plan is to have communities of small, farms supervised by an expert, the farmers to pay for their land as they are able. SHOOTS HIS ACTRESS SISTER Russian Causes Panic Among Aud ience in Concession at the Panama-Pacific Exposition. San Francisco, March 19. An Al gerian dancer, 'known as the "Princess Turkait," a member of a iballet in a Russian amusement concession at the Panama-Pacific Exposition, was shot and killed tonight by her brother, Isaac Lizraki. Lizraki then began firing indiscriminately at the enter tainers, stage and into the audience, causing a panic. The "zone" theater in which the shooting occurred, was crowded when Lizraki rushed in, branishing a pistol. He began firing at once and his sister fell forward with a bullet through the heart. One of the men entertainers on the stage was shot in the arm. The spectators made a rush for the doors. None of them was injured. Lizraki had fired a half dozen shots before a group of soldiers from the Presidio Military Reservation seized and disarmed him. He was arrested and taken to the police station. The reason for the shooting was not learned. D1GGS AND CAMINETT1 AGAIN Federal Court of Appeals Confirms Conviction of the Two Men at San Francisco. San Francisco, -March 19. The United States court of appeals here yesterday uphefd the decision of the lower court in sentencing Maury Diggs and F. Drew Caminetti to imprison ment on McNeil's Island, following their convictions on white slavery charges. Diggs must therefore serve two years and Caminetti eighteen months for their elopement with the two young women, which attracted nation wide attention. The arrest and trial of Caminetti followed their elope-1 ment with Marsha Warrington and Lola Norris, both of Sacramento. The four went from California to Nevada, where they were living when arrested. Both Diggs and Caminetti are mar ried, the latter having two children. BOUND TO HAVE MORPHINE Illinois Woman Victim of the Habit Holds Up Druggist at Point of Revolver. Herrin, 111., March 19. ;Mrs. Jack Overton walked into a drug 'store here yesterday and after waiting until sev eral other patrons had departed, pointed a revolver at the clerk and demanded morphine. Clyde Cox, the clerk, quickly handed the woman a full bottle of the drug. With pistd still aimed at the clerk, Mrs. Overton backed out of the store. Later she was arrested and sent to a hospital fof treatment. CONDENSED NEWS ITEMS The charred body of Daniel Black, a farmer four miles southwest of Sa pulpa, Ok., was found recently in the ruins of his cabin. That the blaze was of Incendiary origin Is the belief of authorities. Black had trouble with neighbors some time ago. A campaign to obtain 5100,000 in Chicago for the relief of Jews in the European war zone has been started. Three million of the six million Jews in Poland and Galicia are homeless and starving, according to a statement by the relief committee. The Liberty Bell Is suffering from an incurable organic disease. The crack which originally was confined to its side has run along its shoulder so that half the bell hangs only by. a slim support. The crack has grown an inch and a quarter within the last eight years, i President Wilson wore a "green tie and in his buttonhole a bunch of sham rock on SL Patrick's day. For the first time In years, however, there was no box of shamrocks received from the "ould sod. Crooked politicians at Terre Haute, Ind., voted the names of hun dreds of men long dead and borrowed registration lists from other towns, according to testimony being brought out at the federal court trial at Indian apolis. The superdreadnaught Pennsyl vania, the mightiest battleship in the world, was launched at Newport News, Va., a few days ago. The ship has a tonnage of. 31,400, against 27,500. the displacement of the largest ships fca ether navies. ANOTHER BATTLE MEHTOHYSER Allies and Germans Face Each Other Across Narrow Belgian River. STOP ADVANCE l!i CHAMPAGNE' But French Troops Continue to Hold Important Heights Against Coun ter Attacks Fighting in Vosges Slackens. London, March 19. The next im portant battle on the western field, it is believed, will take place along the -River Yser, held on one side by the re cently reorganized Belgian army and on the other by the Germans. As the floods have subsided, the Bel gians, supported by the warships of the allies, already have pushed their line slightly forward, and this is al most certain to lead to counter-attacks by the Germans and a general engage ment, as has been the case when sim ilar movements were initiated else where "along the front. An artillery duel in the way of preparation has commenced. There may be a slight delay while the Germans are awaiting for rein forcements from Germany, for they have been using most of their reserves to counter-attack the British troops at St. Eloi and Nueve Chapelle and the French north of Arras, but that a big clash will soon come nobody doubts. The contest for the spur of Notre Dame de Lorette is still injjragress, and, according to Berlin,,, further at tempts of the French to' advance in Champagne, where they captured an important ridge north of Le Mesnil, have been repulsed. The fighting in. the Argonne forest and the Vosges has slackened some what, owing doubtless to the return of wintry weather conditions. There is little news from the East ern front, and beyond the fact that the Russians again have crossed the East Prussian line in the far North east,, near Tilsit, and that they are continuing their offensive against Aus trians in Bukowina, there is no change in the situation. British Suffer Loss. Evidence is accumulating of the heavy British losses in the recent fighting in Flanders. Lord Claud Ham ilton, addressing a meeting in London last night, said the papers were not giving full lists of the losses. His own regiment, the Grenadier Guards, he de clared, lost their colonel and sixteen officers killed and wounded, and of 1,100 men, the finest in the army, only three hundred survived. The Cameronians also seemed to have been almost totally wiped out; their lists of killed and wounded were apalling. Fighting for Positions. London, March 18. At present the armies of Belgium, Great Britain and France are fighting for the hills and other points along the long front which will be of the greatest advantage to the army holding them when the ad vance begins. According to the French communication, the Belgians continue to improve their positions in Flanders, and the French to the north of Arras and in Champagne have add ed eminences to their gains which are of some importance. The French and German official communications, however, are so con tradictory that it is difficult to decide whether any "change is being made generally in the dispositions of the two armies. The optimism which pervades the Western Allies is shared by the Rus sians. All the Petrograd correspond ents of the London papers lead the public to believe big events are im pending. It is apparent the Russians again and not the Austrians are on the move, particularly at Smolnik, on the River San, where it emerges from the Carpathians, while in Bukowina, according to unofficial dispatches from Bucharest, the Austrians have been defeated in a battle which has been raging along the entire front. London, March 17. With the in creasing activities of the British, French and Belgian armies, the re appearaace on the coast of Belgium of British and French warships and the time drawing near for a big effort in the west, the public is following with renewed interest the news of the op erations. The Belgians, who "are being sup ported by the warships of the allies, have consolidated the ground which they have won in the last few days, while the British have done likewise with the strip of territory which they took from the Germans near Nueve Chapelle and have recovered most, if not all, of the trenches which they lost in the region of St. Elio. Big Fire in Champaign, III. Champaign, I1L, March 18L Fire starting from an unknown cause de stroyed, yesterday the half block oc cupied by the six-story Illinoiis build ing and all of a full block adjoining except a corner occupied by the. Citi zens' State bank. The damage will be several hundred thousand dollars. Clark Denies 1916 Boom. Washington, -March 18. Speaker Clark today denied that he is a can didate for the Democratic nomination for president in 1916. Airship Attacks Vessel. South Shields. England, March 18. The British steamship Blonde, arriv ing here yesterday, reported that it was attacked in the North "Sea by a German aeroplane, which dropped one bomb on the deck of the vessel. One member of the crew was killed. A British Agent to Bulgaria. Athens, March 18. Gen. Sir Arthur Faget of the British army was re ceived yesterday by M. Bratiano. He left later for Sofia, where he will have &a ascleiiCB with Kiss Ferdinand. MAGGIES EFFORT NOT GREAT Had Earned Little of the Promised Remuneration for Helping Her Mother. Now that the washing hung on the line, .Mrs. Moran was leaning over the back fence and discussing with sym pathetic Mrs. Regan the problem of bringing up a- daughter. Privately, Mrs. Regan considered that Maggie Moran was born lazy, but Maggie's mother held that Maggie's case was not so simple. "It ain't that Maggie's not willin," said Mrs. Moran. "Willin she is. and active on her bicycle, and always ready to run an errand for you. Bat she ain't one that hears work callin or sees It a-lookin" at her." "It's easier to do a thing yerself than to be tellin' other," said Mrs. Regan, understandingly. "And that's the truth." agreed Mrs. Moran. "But Maggie ain't to blame, although maybe she's a little too easy discouraged. I've seen her tryin. Last winter I says to her, 'Maggie,' I says, 'every time you find something to do to help mother round the house, ITi ive ye a cent, That started her hard at it, Mrs. Regan, and 'twas a full two weeks before she got discour aged and give It up." "And how much did she make?" asked Mrs. Regan. "Nine cents," said Mrs. Moran, "but I called it a dime." Youth's Compan ion. ONE LITTLE THING LACKING Guest at Charitable Function Enjoyed Himself, but Had a Criticism to Make. Two tottery derelicts had Just fin ished a repast at Bethel mission one of the spreads that are being laid out for the unemployed. They were filled and comfortable and disposed to reminisce their experience. "Didje git a piece of that beef. Bill?" asked one of the other. "Yep," said Bill. "An didje git some o' that soup?" "Yep." "An' coffee?" "Yep." "Couldn't o asked for more, couldje?" "Well. I don'no," said- Bill. "Well, what wouldje of asked for?" "I was just a-thinkin," said Bill, "that to make that grub set right In every way, if we'd a just had a little highball to a started it off with there'd be nothin a-tall now to kick about." Louisville Times. An Apt Student. A young woman who came to Co lumbia to take her degree of doctor of philosophy, married her professor in the middle of her second year. When she announced her engagement one of her friends said: "But, Edith, I thought you came up hero to get your Ph. D." "So I did." replied Fdith, "but I had no idea I would get him so soon." Flattered. Mistress Bridget, it always seems to me that the worst mistresses get the best cooks. Cook Ah. go on wid yer blarney! After the war many seats of gov ernment will need patching. Toledo Blade. )lg j CDS fry I -Tfcrl are gained largely by doing common tasks uncommonly welL But to do unusually good work ot any kind, fitness of body and mind are required. Food plays a big part in this matter food that contains true nourishment. And true nourishment be it remembered must include certain important elements which unfortunately are often lacking in the ordinary dietary especially in white bread. These elements are phosphorus, iron, lime, sulphur, etc, stored by Nature in her field grains, and absolutely necessary for building strong, vigorous bodies and active brains. Li made of choice wheat and malted barley, affords all the nutriment of these grains, including these important mineral elements, in form for easy, quick digestion. Grape-Nuts food is always fresh, crisp, sweet and ready to eat with cream or milk. ' Thousands have found that a ration of Grape- Nuts each day makes for real progress, towards the bigger things of life. "There's PROVIDES FOR DOG IN WILL Leaves Fortune to Children cf Neigh bor, Provides They Care for His Puppy. "I hereby bequeath my entire estate, consisting of money in banks - and property, to the children of Mr. and Mrs. A. E, Nichols of Riddle, with the understanding that they are to care for my dog puppy as long as it lives." was the essential part of a will filed by James Rice of Riddle in the pro bate court at Roseburg, Ore. Mr. Rice had lived in southern Doug las county for many years, and was a great admirer of the Nichols chil dren. Recently he decided that they should have his property and money following his death. The puppy, cf which Mr. Rice speaks in his will, had been his constant companion for Bey era! months. It Is understood, that Mr. Rice was moderately wealthy. He was about sixty years of age and unmar' ried. Fashionable Goods Net Wanted. That Latin-Americans Insist on hav ing Just the kind of article that suits their taste Is Illustrated by an Incident in Guatemala. An old gentleman in the Interior, a large ranch owner, had always been used to a certain kind cf necktie, and asked a local house to buy a number of them for him. The house ordered several from an Ameri can concern, but the latter wrote back: that that kind of necktie had been out of date for CO years, and sent several of the latest design. These were re fused, however, the old kind was ob tained from Europe, and the American house lost what might have been an opening wedge to a good trade. III Timed Gesture. 1 Percival You should have heard the audience laugh at Professor Ra venyelp. Penelope I didn't think he was sup posed to be funny. Percival He wasn't; but Just as he started to recite "The Frost Is on the Pumpkin." he reached up and scratched his gray head. Youngstowa Telegram. His Guess. Mrs. Bacon This paper says dis tinct traces of light have been de tected in the ocean at depths of more than 3.000 feet by an English oceano graphies! expedition. Mr. Bacon Some of those careless mermaids left the gas burning, X reckon. The Test. "Do you really believe college edu cation helps a young man in business life?" "I know it does. At college my boy was the champion sprinter cf his class, and now he has a job as band runner." Cause and Result. "Our dairyman's cows look very de jected." "Maybe that Is why our milk is so blue." Out He Went. "John." announced his mother-in-law, "the furnace has gone out." "I think ITI follow it's example," said he, as he reached for his hat. When an old man falls in love it's apt to be a bad falL 5 CD FOOD a Reasori 17 sold by Grocers everywhere. f r'