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U. M VmmimmÈ i l S® y m wàl p >r-; m » ® g i 1 Vtv a y W/: fi-, h w w / m r SS£ Sc Volume 9. Helena, Montana, Thursday, April 1, 1B75. THE WEEKLY HERALD rUBUSUED EVERT THÜR6DAY MORNING. 2.TfÎsk k - ( FISK BROS., Publishers TERMS OF SUBSCRIPTION tsrmh for the daily herald. <'5ty Subscriber« (delivered by earner) permoiith.$3 00 BY M\IL. One copy one month ............................ î 3 00 On * copy tilgte month«...................... o 00 One copy Hix morilh«........................... 12 00 One copy one year................ 22 00 TERMS FOR THE WEEKLY HERALD. One year............ fô 00 Six month«...................................... -I 00 Three month«....................................2 50 Tlic World In What We Rake it. I've «een Koine people in this life Who always are repining. Who never, never yet could see The storm-cloud'« snver lining. There always something is amiss, From sunrise to its setting; That God's hand made their map oi life. They seem the while forgetting. And I have seen a blessed sight To siu-beclouded vision. Some people who, where'er they be, Make earth se* m an Mysian. They always see the brightest side— The direiful shadows never— And keep the flower of hope in bloom Within their hearts lorever. The one can make the sunniest day Seem wondrous sad and dreary ; The other smiles the clouds away. And makes a dark day cheery. This life of onrs is, after all. About as we shall make it. If we can banich grief and care, Let's haste to undertake it. —.— — .» — — Lullaby. Lullaby, baby! Go to sleep; Eyes, oh ! how naughty, Still to peep. Lullaby, baby ! (Juri up your toes ; Cuddle your little knees Up to your nose. Lullaby, baby ! Eyes shut tight ; Little mouth open ; So, good night. ^ n Humorous. The mummies belonged !o the first families of Egypt. —A no light matter—Having your gas pipes freeze up. When is a small baby like a big banker? When he is a wroth-child. Some of the people of Leavenworth, Kan sas, are sa lazy that they write the name of the place "11 worth." "My landlady," said a man, "makes her tea so strong that it breaks the cups. "And mine," said another, "makes her's so weak it can't run out of the pot." "John, I am afraid you have been forget ting me," said a bright-eyed girl to her sweet heart, the other day. "Yes, Sue, I have been for getting you these two years." An orator lately said to his audience: "I am speaking for the benefit of posterity," when some one shouted : "Yes, and if you don't get through soon they'll be here!" "Oh! for those good old days," sighs an Indiana editor, "when this office received enough Patent Oflice Reports to keep every stove red-hot from November to March." A pilot on the Mississippi telegraphed to his w ife in New Orleans: "Ice-bound, my dear." Her reply was* "Dear Hubby—Take blue mass at night and a Seidlitz powder in the morning." "I swear,*' said agentleman to his mistress, "you are very handsome." "Pooh!" said the lady, "so you would say if you did not think so." "And so you would think," answered he, "though I should not say so." A Welsh clergyman in an obituary of a ltrothei* minister slates that "he died in his harness, and his buckles were undone as noiselessly as the angel unbarred and unlock ed the prison in which Peter was confined." A country paper tells this story of a new boy in one of the Sunday schools: "The preco cious youth was asked w'ho made the beauti ful hills about them, and replied that he did not know', as his parents only moved into town the day before." —"You may kindly guide the prancing steed to the crystal brook which babbles down the hillside in the summer sun, but you cannot coerce him to stoop and slake his thirst in the silvery stream if he be not will ing to accept your proffered kindness." A witness, in describing certain events, said: "The person I saw at the head of the stairs was a man with one eye named Jacob Wilkins." "What was the natneof his other eye?" spitefully asked the opposing counsel. The witness was disgusted at the levity of the audience. » —Very stern parent indeed—"Come here, sir! What is this complaint the^ schoolmaster has made against you ?" Much injured youth —"Its just nothing at all. You see Jimmy bent a pin, and I only just left it on the teach er's chair for him to look at, and he came in without his specs and sat right down on the pin, and now he wants to blame me for it!" —About sundown last evening, says the Wiunemucca Register of the 20th ult., a care worn pi inter might have beeb seen with a jackass load of specimens stripped to his back, slowly and wearily wending bis way into town from the summit of Winaemueca Mountain, where he has discovered a valuable mine. He thinks the ledge is at least a hun dred feet wide, and runs straight through the mountain. He says one hundred dollars a day would not Induce him Wrtfcticktype again. is RULES ON POKES. BY GENERAL SKUNK. a 1. Don't buy but half as many chips at the start as the other players. Tüe expectation is that you will win, and if you lose it is bet ter to borrow or "owe" up. 2. Never ante up until some one tells you to, and then say that you have and stick to it, which will generally persuade some one else to "come in" twice. This rule, though an excellent one, must be followed with discre tion. If practiced too often it is liable to pro duce unpleasant feelings. 3. Toward the end of the evening it is al ways belter to uice up your aute "for a min ute"' than to put up, as the wiuner of the pot frequently forgets to charge up the debits, and none of the other players will remind him, as they may wish to do the same thiug. 4. When the credit system begins to creep in, as it generally does about the middle of the game, you should always oioe up if possi ble, and bet chiefly against those who always put up. This is oue of the most important duties. To win in cash and lose on credit is the great secret of successful poker playing. 5. In dealing, always observe the bottom card, which you can easily do before the cut. Then, by noticing how thick a cut is made, you can tell whether that card goes out. This may help yon in the draw. 0. Keep a sharp eye on the discards. They may be of service if your draw is not satis factory. 7. When you are "in luck" watch your op portunity, from time to time, to put some of your cheeks in your pocket without being seen. This will enable you to "owe" up if luck turns, and will prevent your being bor rowed from. 8. When any one wants to buy more checks, and you have plenty, get him to buy of you, if possible, in preference to the bank. It enables you to conceal the amount of your winnings, and besides the bank may not be nhlo to P'ty up. 9. When you are "chipping out for drink*, etc., put a cigar in your pocket every once in awhile. You are sure to be so much ahead of the game, and they come in very handy, even when you don't smoke. 10. Never permit anything to make you forget for a moment that the whole object of your game is to save your own money and secure some one else's, and let everything you do, however trifling, tend to this desir able end. 11. When the game is over, if you are winner, deny it entirely, or fix the figure as low as possible; if you are loser, declare that you have lost twice as much as you really have. This rule is never departed from. The money lost at a game of poker always foots up four times as much as the money won. 12. When it is inconvenient to avoid pay- ing your poker debts entirely, use discrimina- tion in the matter. Debts to persons whom you are not likely to meet very often you can avoid. Many players feel a delicacy about asking for a poker debt—these are safe ones not to pay. --- — ------- A Mule Willing' to Go. A bad little boy lit a pack of shooting crackers, and threw them into the street to see them "go off." One of Ike Batman s mules came along and swallowed them before they "went off." The mule walked about fifteen feet and stopped. Things wasn't acting right inside. He began to taste the smoke of fire-crackers. He laid his left ear around against his ribs and heard something. It was them crackers having fun. The mule picked out about three and a half miles of straight road, and started. A negro met him about a mile the other side of the Alins House, going south, white with perspiration, with streams of smoke shooting out of his nostrils, mouth and ears, while his tail stuck straight up, and a stream of blue and green smoke about ten feet long followed in the rear. Ike found his mule yesterday morning sticking half way through a farm-house near Paddy's run, still smoking. The man had got his family out and put"'em up in a lot of trees. Ike hauled his mute home, when he got cool enough, on a dray. The man is going to move his house further back off the road, and his wife and oldest daughter will be baptized when the water gets ws.rm.-Louisville Courier-Journal. About seventy years ago a man w*as travel ing through northern Idaho and camped one pleasant evening on one of the plains. On awakening in the morning he found himself covered with snow, and on digging out found that it had fallen during the night to the depth of forty feet on the level. He could see no trace of his horse and sat for half a day mus ing upon the mutability of human affairs, when all of a sudden there came up one of those '•Chinook winds," (that's what he called it,) and in a half hour's time the snow wa» all gone and the ground covered with water to a great depth. He discovered and caught his horse, and was obliged to swim him about thirty miles to a range of mountains, where be found a place of safety. The gentleman stated that he was the leader of a scientific exploring expedition, and the whole ®f the rest of the party, with all of their papers, were gone, and the valuable information they bad accumulated was thus lost to the world. A gentleman owned a farm in New Jersey. It had been long in the family. Embarrass ments compelled him to sell, and the farm was put up at nuctioo. lie felt so bad about the sale that be coukl not attend it, but sent over his head servant. On his return the master said, "Well, John, was the farm told?" "'Yes, sir." "Did it sell well?" "It went very low." "Who bought it?" "I did." "You, John! Where did you get your money?" "I laid up my wages Since I worked for you." "Well, John, I'll tell you what I will do. As toon as you get the title to your property I'll come and work for you, uy the farm bark/' to you tod hi ••Is Sherman a Catholle I" Teddy O'Trix in the Rochester Express. This question seems to be agitating the Cathulic mind about as much us whether "Shakespeare was a Catholic." I will tell you all about it, aud you can draw your own conclusions. I have seen Father Young, an aged Dominican priest, who baptized the dis tinguished General. When the elder 8her muu died he left a widow w ith a large family and a smail purse. The Ewings w ere near neighbors, aud nearer friends, of the family, anti old "Tom," in the kindness of his heart, proposed to Mrs. Sherman to adopt one of the children. The proposition was accepted, aud little "Tecumseh" was interrupted in the classical pastime of "kneeding" mud pics and taken to the home of the Ewings, lu paren thesis 1 w ish to remark, « la Mark Middle in "Loudon Assurance," that I have no hesita tion in saying, and I say it boldly, that "our hero" was not the boy whom Henry Ward Beecher caught in a si miliar kind of mud business; and interviewed thusly : "My boy, what are you doing?" "I am making Ply mouth church, sir!" "Where's the pastor?' "Oh! there is not mud enough around here to make him!" Strange boy! How preco cious! Aud yet the great scandal was then unknown. The Ewings being Catholics, young Sherman was educated in the princi ples of that faith; w r a9 baptized by Father Young, then a missionary in the wilds of Ohio, and up to the time he entered West Point was the noblest Roman (Catholic) of them all. When he began to learn the science of arms he began t to forget the science of religion. In all the number of saints that 1 have read of there is only one saint who was a soldier, and that was Louis of France—the only exception to the general rule, but a Frenchman always acts by contraries! The "General" was named William, because he was baptized on St. William's day. Now, it is well known that he is not a pratica] church man, and whether he can be called a Catholic or not you may put this and that together and judgfi for j'ourself. Charity in Silence. For a long time the English newspapers have been acknowledging the receipt of checks for a thousand pounds for various benevolent objects from a person whooo narno never could be discovered. The money was generally sent by post, either through the Times or some other respectable journal. Much curiosity was manifested to know the name of this extraordinary and modest bene factor, who would, under no circumstances, allow his candle to be taken from under the bushel. Rumor grew, and it came to be widely believed that the Queen was actually taking this method of disbursing a part of of her enormous fortune, and that she was earning a new title to the endearment of her subjects by scattering thousand pound notes for purposes of general benevolence. It has now been ascertained that the real person was a Mr. Atwood, "an old gentleman living near Chestnut." He was about 80 years of age, a bachelor, and had amassed a large fortune in the manufacture of glass. He lived in com plete retirement, and has recently died. Since his death it has been discovered that he gave away $1,700,000 in this manner, and that in the last year of his life his donations amount ed to $250,030. Notwithstanding the enor mous sums thus contributed to the public welfare, Mr. Atwood left a fortune of $5,000, OuO. This is an odd but pleasing evidence of an eccentric disposition. It destroys, however, one of the most popular delusions concerning the Queen. The Spider. This is a inseck that cetche3 flies in a net like a fish net, but not in the water. The net is called a web, and when it cetches dust in sted of flies it is a eobwed. The spider kuoes he is ugla, so he stayes a good deal at home, but ugly wimmen goes to church and walks in the streets more than pretty; but they are both in the same business, which is treppin'. In Californy they has spiders that scorns to spin webs, but goes out aud cetches game like other beasts of prey. They are about the size of a girl baby, and a lot of pizener. They is tar antulers. When an injin has bit hisself with a tar antuler he fills his skin with whisky and steals a blanket to wrap hisself in, aud hunts a place where his body will be most in the way. Then he lies down, and if the pizen don't work at orrce he sings the deth-s >ng of the brave, and that nock9 him. We was told this to our house by a traveler who said he guessed be knew a tarnal site about injins and tar antulers. though he hadn't never been to college. But Uncle Ned he says it is best to get a good edducation first, and then thro' in injins and tar antulers according to taste.— Johnny's Composition in National Republican. _ Removal of a Tape-worm. A writter to the Druggists' Circular says that in treating some cases of tape-worm be has employed no preliminary provisions beyond forbidding the patient tp take any breakfast the day on which it is intended to remove the worm, and giving him a large dose of Rochelle salts <the preceding night. At 10 o'clock in the morning a dose is given made of one-half ounce of bark of pomegranito root, one-half drachm pumpkin seed, one drachm ethereal extract of male fern, oue-half drachm pow dered egot, two drachms powdered gum ara ble, and two drop9 croton oil. The pome granite bark and pumpkin seed are thorough ly bruised, and, with the egot, boiled in eight ounces of water for fifteen minutes, then strained through a coarse cloth. The croton oil is first well rubbed up with the acacia and extract of male fern, and then formed into an emulsion with the decoction. In each case the worm was expelled alive and entire within two hours. In each case, too, the worm was passed with the bead firmly fas tened to the side of its body at about the widest part, from which it was with difficulty removed. Importance of Wholesome Beds. Sleep to the workingman is emphatically nature's restorer, reinvigorating the physical system, which through much toil has become weary, and keeping up the flow of life and spirits which are necessary to the perfor mance of the arduous duties of farm life. A comfortable bed, as we are all aware, con duces greatly to one's rest. On this subject a recent writer says: Of the eight pounds which a man eats and drinks in a day, it is thought that not less than five pounds leaves his body through the skill. Aud of these five pounds a consider able per centage escapes during the night while he is in bed. The largest portion of this is water, but in addition there is much effete and poisonous matter. This, being in great part gaseous in form, permeates every part of the bed, mattress, blankets, as well as sheets, which soon become foul and need purification. The mattress needs the renovation quite as much as the sheets. To allow the sheets to be used, without washing or changing three or six months would be regarded as bad housekeeping; but I insist if a thin sheet can absorb enough of the excretion of the body to make it unfit for use in a few days, a thick mattress, which can absorb and retain a thousand times as much of these poisonous excretions, needs to be purified as often, certainly, as once in three months. A sheet can be washed. A mattress cannot be rennovated in this way. Indeed, there is no way of cleansing a mattress but by steam ing it or picking it to pieces, and thus, in fragments, exposing it to the rays of the sun. As these processes are scarely practicable with any of the ordinary mattresses, I am decidedly of the opinion that the good old fashioned straw bed, which can every three months be changed for fresh straw, and the tick be washed, is the sweetest and healthiest of beds. If, in the wintry season, the porousness of the straw bed makes it a little uncomfortable, spread over it a comforter or two woolen blankets, which should be washed as often as every two weeks. With this arrangement, if you wash all the bed coverings as often as once in two weeks, you will have a delightful, healthy bed. mow, if jo« Icto «Ko K«<a *o oi», with Alien window, during the day, and not make it up for the night before ^evening, you will have added greatly to the sweetness of your re-t, and, in consequence, to the tone of your health. I heartily wish the change could be every where introduced. Only those who have thus attended to this important matter can judge of the influence on the general health and spirits. llintsi to Mr. Bergli. Eight hours should be a day's work on a dog churn, the dog to be alio wed. one day in the week to himself. Let every dog have his day. A fine for imposing bogus watches on watch dogs. The watch dog's honest hark has often been raised against the swindle. Protection of ants for their nephews and nieces. Cushioned toadstools would be highly ap preciated by toads after a "hop." Punish boys who frighten the frogs and make them jump; sudden shocks are some times fatal to a nervous organization. Encourage trout to write poetry. We have seen some very beautiful trout lines ere now. Rostrums in the ocean for whales to "spout" from. This is a want long felt, and the whales pout about it. Abolish mosquito bars. They make mos quitoes irregular about their own. Introducing the German language into the schools of fish. Pocket handkerchief for crocodiles to wipe away their tears. A school in accounts for adders, who al- ready multiply rapidly. -----—^ l<i>> ---- Now lTon Bonin to Talk. On a certain occasion the counsel took some exception to the ruling of the Court on some point and a dispute arose. "If the Court please," said the counsel, and at the same time picked up a volume. "There is no referring to any book," ex claimed the Court angrily. "I have decided the p'int. "But, your Honor—" persisted the at torney. "Now, I don't want to hear anything on the subject," yelled the Court. "I tell you again I have decided the p'int." "I know that," was the rejoinder, "I am satisfied of that; but this is a volume of Blackstone. I am certain that he differs with your Honor, and I only want to show you "what a fool Blackstone was." "Ah, indeed," exclaimed the Court, "now you begin to talk." -— « I —I »* ---- "The \mg of Hin Tail.** A gentleman was walking with his little boy at the close of the day, and in passing the cottage t>f a German laborer, the boy's attention was attracted to the dog. It was not a King Charles, nor a black and tan, bnt a common cur. Still the boy took a fancy to him and wanted "pa" to buy him. Just then the owner of the dog canle home from his labors, and was met by the dog with every demonstration of dog joy. The eeotleman said to the owner, * My little boy has taken a fancy to your dog, and I will buy him; wbat do von asfc for him?" "I can't sell that dog!' f suid the German. "Look here," said the gentleman, "that is a F oor dog, anyway, but as my boy wants him will give you $5 for him." "Yaas,'' says the German, "I know be is a very poor dog, and he ain't wort almost noddin', but dere Isb von little ding mid dat dog vot 1 ean*t sell. I can't sell de vsg of bis tail ven I comes homes at night." "Next," shouted a barber, who had just finished a customer. Two persons >»t once sprang from their seats, where they had been patiently waiting, and approached the knight ut the lather, and both looking ferociously and inquiringly at each other. One of them was an elderly personage, ev dently from the country ; the other a young sprig of city breed, whose down had just be gun to indicate the slow and uncertain ap proach of beard. "Which of you is next ? asked the bar ber. "I am," said the young man. "No, you are not. Vv e both entered at the same time, and as 1 am the oldest, I claim the first chance. Besides, 1 am in a great hurry." * "Ah, old party, I see you are from the country, and of course don't know the rules of city society, governing such cases as this," said the youth. "What is the rule?" "Simply this: Beauty goes before age— so I will take the chair. See?" "O, well, that's right. Mr. Barber slmve him first. He has got the best of me by that city rule of his; aim, come to think of it, he is right according to the rule where 1 come from." "Indeed ! Whal is the rule where you come from, old party?" asked the young fellow, as he fixed himself comfortably in the bar ber's chair. "Wall, young man, the rule up my way is, that we always keep the hogs ahead ot us.^ So vou can go ahead. Barber, it's all right, said he, taking up a paper and sitting down to read/* _____ .« -4-flO»V v. ------------ The Terrible Snow Slide. Traces of the avalanche which came down from Mount Davidson during the late heavy fall of snow are still visible. In many places snow still remains to the depth oi six or eight feet, while the houses which were demolish- ed are as they were let t after the huge masses which crushed them had spent their force. Some are hurled from their foundations into the street, others are crushed into shapeless masses of debris, while others still, which wer« onij pAitmlly demolished, have been repaired and are in use. The residents along that part of Howard street tell of hair-breadth escapes, some of which are truly startling. One man was on the roof of his house and saw a huge ball of snow coming down the mountain, increasing with great rapidity and making directly toward him. He jumped off, rushed in, caught his wife and threw her from the back part of the building where she was sitting just as that part of the structure was crushed into atoms. Another talks of covering over the snow as it la>s in 1 lie yard and using it for an ice-house all summer. While still another has dug into the compact mass and shelters therein his pigs and goats from the piercing March winds which sweep the hights. It will be months, still, ere that part of the city will recover from the terrible snowballs hurled on it by Mount Davidson.— Virginia Enterprise. March 5th. - — — — The Temple of Jnnticc. " .Vhat's this boy here for?" inquired His Honor, as a tearful lad of 10 skulked out aud stood before him. "Fighting," answered Bijali. "He kicked me first!" wailed the lad, big tears falling dow n. "And then you--?" asked the court. "Tbcu I walloped him," answ ered the boy. "I was a boy once myselt," said the eouit ; "yes, sir, strange as it may seem, I was a boy. I bad my fights and my troubles, and I don't want to be hard on you. You look like a good boy, and I'm goim> to let you go. Be careful after this. I don't say that jou must run when a boy kicks you, and I don't advise you to kick back—not if there is an officer around. Go borne, bub; be good to you mother, respectful to your father, and see if you can't be President of the United Mates some day ."—Detroit Free Press. A Cure for Diphtheria. A correspondent of the Scientific American says: "Take a flat iron ami heal it a little'on the stove; on this apply a very little pitch (notgas) tar; have the iron hot euough to make a good smoke. Then let the patient lake into his mouth the small end of a funnel, and have the smoke blown through the tunnel into his mouth. Let the smoke be inhaled well into the throat for a few minutes five or six times a day. In very bad cares, it might be welt to use it offener. After this, let the patient lie on bis bark then break up small pieces of ice aud put them into his mouth, and let them go as far down to the roots of the tongue as possible. When they have dissolved, put in some more; this will keep down the inflammation." Car* for C'alnrrli. A medical authority asserts that the sever- est catarrh cold ran he removed in about leu hours by a mixture of carbolic acid, 10 drops, tincture of iodine and chloroform, each 7:5 drops. A few drops of the mixture should be heated over a «ptri» lamp in a test tube, the mouth of which should be Applied to the nostrils as volatilization is effected. The operation should be repeated in about two minutes, when, after the patient sneezes a number of times, the troublesome symptoms rapidly disappear. --r^ •« ►» - —Qypbers are much used in writing such matter on postal raids as the writers wish to keep secret. Bnt "sympathetic" ink is much better. One of the most simple of these is lemon jniee. A very slight heat will fie sufficient to bring out the character/ legi bly. If a stronger black is desired, sulphuric acid, with twenty parts water, mnv 1« used. These dry in the air without showing a sign, but beat will bring them out plainly.