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m fs-. i -Sc" "HW Volume 9. Helena, Montana, Thursday, April 8, 1875. No. 20 THE WEEKLY HERALD PUBLISHED EVERY THURSDAY MORNINO. j; f ^| k - [ FISK BROS,, Publishers W TJÜtMS OF SUBSCRIPTION TERMS KOK THE DAILY HERALD. < ;ty Mabscribi (delivered by carrier) j»cr month.$3 00 BV MA II. One copy one month............................S 3 00 On copy thru« months..................... 6 00 One copy six months........................... 12 00 One copy one year............................. 22 00 TERMS FOR THE WEEKLY HERALD. Oiio yeAr....... Six months---- Three months. .......... $6 00 .......... 4 00 ..........2 50 H V XDRY APPROPK1ATIOXS. Among other items of interest in the act making appropriations for sundry civil ex penses of the government, passed at the recent session of Congress, we find the following* For iron gratings for the windows, and putting up the same, iu the ouildiug for peni tentiary purposes iu the Territory ot Montana, one thousand and two hundred dollars. For the continuation of the geological and geographical survey of the Territories of the United »States, uniter the direction of the Sec retary of the Interior, during the fiscal year ending June thirtieth, eighteen hundred and seventy-six; by tue first division, under F. V. Hayden, iu Colorado and such adjacent por tions of New Mexico as were not explored the preceding year, seventy-five thousand dol lars; and by the second division, under J. W. Powell, in Utah, twenty-five thousand dollars; in all, one hundred thousand dollars, to be immediately available. For the preparation and publication of the maps, charts, geological sections, and other engravings uecessary to illustrate the reports of the United States geological and geogra phical survey of the Territories: by the first division, twenty thousand dollars; and by the second division twenty thousand dollars; in all, forty thousand dollars, to be expended tinder the direction of the Secretary of the Interior. For collection of mining and mineral sta tistics, under the charge of Professor Ros siter VV. Raymond, the amount to he imme diately available, to be expended, and to be for the completion of the work, fifteen thou sand dollars. For surveying the public lands in Montana Territory, at rates not exceeding fifteen dol lars per linear mile for standard lines, twelve dollars for township, and ten dollars for sec tion lines, forty thousand dollars. For rent of olllce of surveyor-general of Montana Territory, fuel, hooks, stationery, and other incidental expenses, two thousand five hundred dollars. To meet the expenses of suppressing depre dations upon the timber on the public lands, five thousand dollars. For geographical surveys of the Te rritories west of the one hundredth meridian, forty thousand dollars. For salaries and commissions of registers of land-offices and receivers of public moneys at ninety land-offices, five hundred and twen ty-five thousand and seven hundred dollars. For incidental expenses of the laud-offices, fifty-seven thousand nine hundred and forty dollars. For expenses of depositing moneys re ceived from sales of public lands, thirteen thousand dollars. In the act making appropriations for the legislative, executive, and judicial expenses of the Government for the year ending June JO, 1870, the following relates to Montana: For salaries of governor, chief justice and tw'o associates judges, aud secretary, titteen thousand dollars. For legislative expenses, namely : For com pensation and mileage of members of legisla tive assembly, eleven thousand three hundred dollars ; compensation of officers of legislative assembly, three thousand two hundred and forty dollars; contingent and miscellaneous expenses, one thousand five hundred dollars ; contingent and miscellaneous expenses of the secretary's office, one thousand eight hundred and forty dollars ; pay of clerk during ses sion ot legislative assembly, three hundred dollars ; pay of clerk in assisting to copy and index laws, five hundred dollars ; for print ing, four thousand dollars; in all, twenty-two thousand six hundred and eighty dollars. For contingent expenses of the Territory, to lie expended by the governor, one thou sand dollars. For surveyor-general of the Territory of Montana, three thousand dollars ; and for the clerks in his office, five thousand dollars. In the postal bill, passed at the recent ses sion, so much of section 3826 of the Re vised Statutes of the United States as refers to the publication of mail-lettings iu the news papers, was repealed. In lieu thereof the following is enacted : The Postmaster-General shall cause an ad vertisement of the mail-lettings of each State or Territory to l>e posted up in each post-office therein, to be posted conspicuously for at least sixty days before the time of such letting. Little Johnny, writing a r oinposit ion about plus, says : "Them at fairs is sometimes so fat that you can't tell which end it is that eats till you see a basin of grule near by, and then it swings round and point« at it like a com pass. Some men spends a lot of time curlin' their pigs' tales, which is no use except to eat, and is best roasted, though the trotter is good too!" a A CTNNIN« SOLDIER. The Price of Two Potatoes in 1*03. The following anecdote of the first Napo leon was related by an Englishman, who was a considerable time iu the French military service, and who vouches tor its authenticity: The evening before the battle of Ulm,when Napoleon the First, iu company with Mar shal Berthier. was walking incognito through the camp, and listening to the talk of his sol diers, he saw in a group not far off a grena dier of the Guard, roasting some potatoes in the ashes. "I should like a roast potaloe above all things," said the Emperor to the Marshal; "ask the owner if he will sell one." In obedience to the order, Berthier advanc ed to the group and asked to whom the pota toes belonged. A grenadier stepped forward and said, "They are mine." "Will you sell me one?" inquired Berthier. "I have only five," said the grenadier, "and that's hardly enough for my supper." "I will give you two Napoleons if yon will sell me one," continued Berthier. "I don't want your gold," said the grena dier; "I shall be killed, perhaps, to-morrow, and I don't want the enemy to find me with an empty stomach." Berthier reported the soldier's answer tothe Emperor, who was standing a little in the background. "Let's see if I shall be luckier than you," said the latter, and going close up to the grenadier, he asked if he would sell him a potatoc. "Not by a long shot," answered the grena dier; "I haven't enough for myself." "But you can name your own price," said Napoleon. "Come, I am hungry, and have not eaten to-day." "I tell you I haven't enough for myself," replied the grenadier; "beside all that, do you thiuk I don't know you in spite of your dis guise?" "Who am I, then?" inquired Napoleon. "Bah!" said the grenadier; "the Little Cor poral. as thev all call you. Am I right?" "Well," said Napoleon, "since you know me, will you sell me a potatoe?" "No," said the grenadier; "but if you would have me come and dine with you when we get back to Paris, you may sup with me to night." "Done!" said Napoleon, "on the word of a Little Corporal—on the word of an Emper or." "Well and good," said the grenadier. "Our potatoes ought to be done by this time, there are the two largest ones; the rest I'll eat my self." The Emperor sat down and ate his potatoes, and then returned with Berthier to his tent, merely remarking: "The rogue is a good soldier, I'll wager." Two months afterward Napoleon the Great was in the midst of a brilliant court at the pal ace of the Tuileries, and was just sitting down to dine when word was brought to him that a grenadier was without trying to fore the guard at the door, saying that he had been invited by the Emperor. "Let him come in," said bis Majesty. The soldier entered, presented arms, and said to the Emperor: "Do you remember once having supped with me off my roast potatoes?" "Oh! is that you? Yes, I remember," said the Emperor; "and so yon have come to dine with me, have you? Rustan, lay another cover on your table for this brave fellow." Again the grenadier presented arms, and said: "A grenadier of the Guard does not eat with lackeys. Your Majesty told me I should dine with you—that was the bargain—and, trusting to your word, I have come hither." "True, true," said the Emperor; "lay a cover here near me. Lay aside your arms, mon ami , and draw* up to the table." Dinner over, the grenadier went at his usu al pace, took up his carbine, and turning to the Emperor, presented arms. "A mere private." said he, "ought not to dine at the table of the Emperor." "Ah! I understand you." said Napoleon. "I name you Chevalier of the Legibn of Honor, and Lieutenant in my company of Guards." "Thank von. heartily," returned the sol dier. " Vive V Empereur!" he shouted, and then withdrew. Rather Cold. A correspondent of the Toronto (Canada) Globe wrote from Bridge Creek, British Columbia, on February 19tl* : "The ther mometer at this place was frozen up, so we could not tell how cold it was. A bottle of good brandy and a bottle containing two pounds of mercury were put out as a test on February 14th. In the morning both were frozen solid. This cold snap has lasted for more than two weeks, with no signs of mild weather. The mercury in the thermometer has been frozen every night." in A high-school pupil in a cross-town car recited her geometry lesson tc a fellow girl, recently, as follows: If the angles at the base of an isosceles triangle are equal tothe square of the bypotbenuse of a right-angle cone, then the rectangle of the diameter of a circle is equal to the square of the—ah—to the—ah —is equal to the—ah—to the square—to the— ah—oh, bother! gimme that book! I wish pa 'ud let me take dancing lessons instead of these horrible squares, and angles, and hy pothenuses .—Chicago Journal. —We hear of a young man who has flat tered his girl so much that she is now so proud she refuses to speak to him. This is something like the man who desired to sell some stock which was slow and considerably below par. "Advertise it," said one of his friends. He did so. and at last brought it up to so eood a position in the market that he concluded to retain it himself, which he did to very great profit Moral—advertise liber ally and talk sense to your girl. An Amusing Court Incident. The following court scene we copy from the Missoulian. We are told that it is a very correct version of what transpired in Virginia City, (hut not in Nevada) iu 1874, aud that members of the Moutaua Bar aud others of the Territory will readily place it : The scene occurred iu the circuit court in Virginia City, Nevada, iu the ) e.ir 1874. A person iudicted lor murder was ou trial ; the evidence was conducted ; aud the prosecuting attorney, whom we will call Joues, had maue Ins opening speech to the jury, aud was fol lowed by ueleudant's attorney, whom we will call Brown. Mr. Brown rose and bowed gravely to the court and then to the jury, and paused—the silence was painful. All eyes were centered on Mr. Brown when Mr. Brow n hau collected his ideas sufficiently to proceed. He turned to the court and said : "May it please your Honor," and to the jury : "and you, gentlemen of the jury." Pause. Some one iu the crowd cried out, "Well." This interruption was promptly checked by the court, and Mr. Brown was directed to pro ceed. Mr. Brown— "Gentlemen of the jury: In the language of Senator Doolittle, I believe in God, and under him 1 believe iu the re ligion of Jesus Christ." This startling declaration iu a murder case produced no little confusion in the court room, which was promptly suppressed by the Judge calling out, "Let us have quiet in the court; now' proceed, Mr. Brown, aud conflue yourself strictly to the facts in the case." Mr. Brown proceeded, quoting copiously from the law of Moses and other standard authorities on the crime of murder, aud con cluded his argument iu a most pathetic ap peal for justice, tempered with mercy, to his client, aud reaffirming his belief in God and the religion of Jesus Christ. At the conclu sion of Mr. Brown's speech, the court took a recess. When court was called, Mr. Jones imme diately proceeded to the jury'. After looking closely at the jury as ir to determine in his own mind whether the jury was with or "forninst" him, he said: "May it please your Honor, and you, gentleman of the jury : Mr. Brown has told you that he believed in God and religion. 'The Chinaman has his God and his religion ; the Turk has his God and his religion ; and I have my God and my religion; but my God and my religion differs very much from Mr. Brown's." The Judge.—"Mr. Jones, you will confine yourself strictly to the facts iu the case. Let us have quiet in the court. Proceed, Mr. Jones. Mr. Jones.—"All right, yer Honor; I'll confine myself strictly to the facts in the case : Gentlemen ot the jury—Mr. Brown told you that he believed iu God and religion. The Chinaman has his God and his religion; the Hottentot has his God and his religion ; Brig ham Young has his God aud his religion ; and I have my God and my religion ; but my God and iny religion differ materially from Mr. Brown's." The Judge (excitedly)—"Mr. Jones, 1 will not stand this thing any longer; you must confine yourself to the facts iu the case. Let's have quiet in the court; goon, Mr. Jones." Mr. Jones.—"All right, yer Honor; I will confine myself strictly to the facts in the case: Gentlemen of the jury—Mr. Brown has told yon that he believed in God and religion ; the Chinaman has his God and his religion ; the Turk has his God and his religion; and the African negro has his God and his religion ; but my God aud my religion differs very much from Mr. Brown's." The Judge ( whose rage was now at a white heat)—"Stop! Stop! I'll endure this no longer. Here, gentlemen of the jury, take these papers, retire at once, and bring in your verdict. Mr. Wood and Mr. Blaine, you will prefer charges against Mr. Jones for conduct unbecoming a lawyer and an officer of this court. Mr. Jones, you will appear before me to-morrow morning at 9 o'clock, to answer to these charges. Mr. Sheriff, adjourn court." As the Judge retired from the court room, Jones was heard to soliloquize thus : "W hat ! he prefer charges against me, Samuel P. Jones, district attorney for the State of Ne vada!—he, from the Western Reserve of Ohio! I will giye him to understand that no skimmilk Judge from the Western Reserve of Ohio can prefer charges against me, Samuel P. Jone«, district attorney. I will let him know that I have the ear of the court, and, if he is not very careful how he treats me in court, the first thing he knows he will find himself back in the Western Reserve, feeding on his old diet of whey and curds." —You boys ought to be kind to your little sisters. I öuee knew a bad boy who struck his little sister a blow over the eye. Although she didn't fade and die in the early summer time, when the June roses were blowing, with the sweet words of forgiveness on her pallid lips, she rose up and hit him over the head with the rolling pin. so that he couldn't go to Sunday School for more than a month on account of not being able to put his best hat on. Parson Brcwnlow tells a good story of an old Presbyterian bachelor preacher, known almost as a woman-hater until he was 50years old, when he married and settled somewhere among the mountains of South Carolina. The Parson says: "Our bachelor friend was preaching on the sinner's excuses, T have bought a piece of ground and wish to go and see il,' said one. Here is want of inclination to attend to divine things, said the preacher. Another said, 'I have bought five yoke of ox- en, and must needs go and prove them.' This seems a case of necessity. A third said, 'I have married a wife, and therefore cannot come.' Here is a case of natural impossibil- ity, from which we may infer, continued our bachelor preacher, that a woman will pull a rnau further from the Lord than ten steers." Wbat Will They Do 1 Some people are figuring up the immigra tion to this State during the present year at 70,000. If they all go to the large cities, as most of the immigrants did last year, it would be better for them and the State not to come at all. The curse of California now is the over population of its principal towns. What the State most needs is people in the country. —California paper. * To which the Territorial (Nevada) Enter prise subjoins some sensible remarks: "Suppose a car-load of immigrants, fresh from the East, go to any point in the country iu California, w hat are the inducements of- fered them to settle? They might get work on the farms for the next few mouths at low wages, at work which a Chinaman could not very well do, hut not much else ; and then, iu nine cases out of ten, the surroundings would be ot a kind to make a man long tor a shade tree and a little milk for his coffee. Not that the farmers would not do as well as they could, but the majority of the farmers of California are not rich. Suppose the im- migrants brought a little money, could they be secure in buying a home and planting a crop in any of the great valleys of the Golden State? Would it be anything more thau fair to say to them, ' You tnay get a crop, but if we have a flood you will be drowned out, and if we do not, your crop will die for want of moisture.' It looks as though the principal hope of California, after all, lay in'the Corn- stock and other mines of Nevada. We notice Baldwin has bought a two hundred thousand dollar ranch. That is bonanza money. Sen- ator Jones made a similar purchase just be- fore going to Washington last fall. That came out of Crown Point. When our mines fill San Francisco to overflowing with silver, then, perhaps, interest will get so low that the rich men there will be content with sure investments at small interest, and con- clude to build canals to make sure the annual crops; to build sugar, woolen, linen, paper and iron mills, and cause to be manufactored what is now so easily imported. Then there will be woik for immigrants; there will be comfortable homes among farmers, and a proopority will commence such as the State has never known." -I —I »» t—1 -------- A Model Lawyer. "Squire Johnson" was a model lawyer, as the following anecdote will evince 1 Mr. Jones once rushed into the Squire's office iu a great passion. "That infernal scoundrel of a cobbler, Smith, has sued me, Mr. Johnson—sued me for five dollars I owe him for a pair of boots ! "Then you owe him the five dollars ?" "Tobe sure I do, but he has gone and sued me—sued me !" "Then why don't you pay him, ii' you owe him ?" "Because he's sued me; and when a man does that, I'll never pay him till it costs him more than he get«. I want yon to make it cost him all you can." "But it will cost you something, too." "I don't care fur that ; what do you charge to begin with?" "Ten dollars; and more if there is much extra trouble." "All right! There's the X. Now go ahead !" No sooner wa9 his client gone than Squire Johnson stepped across to his neighbor Smith and offered to pay the bill, on condition that the suit be withdrawn. The shoemaker gladly acceded—all he wanted was his pay. The lawyer retained the other five for his fee, and as the case was not "troublesome," made no further demands upon his client. Ten days after, Jones comes in to see how his case is getting along. "All right," said the lawyer. "Y T ou won't have any trouble about that. I put it to Smith so strongly that he was glad to withdraw the suit altogether." "Capital," cried the exu'ting Jones. "You have done it up brown. You shall have all my business.'' ^ The Aurora Boreal to. Various theories have from time to time been offered in explanation ot the aurora borealis. A recent one is that ot M. Groue manu. He assigns to the polar light a cosmic origin ; supposing it to be formed of masses of fine meteoric powder entering our atmos phere with a liiglf velocity (say 40,000 meters in a second,) aud so becoming incandescent; just as the same matter, in a less state of divis ion, produces falling stars. This meteoric powder, composed, iu a great part, of mag netic metals (iron, nickel, etc.,) comes under the influence of terrestrial magnetism, and is grouped in the magnectic lines (rays of the aurora,) aß steel tilings are on a plane placed over the poles of.a magnet. The rays do not always point to the horizon and the auroral bands, frequently noticed perpendicular tu the meridian, may result from powder chiefly composed of diamagnetic substances ( a high temperature aud a fine division favoring the diamagnetic properties of certain bodies, such as compounds of carbon.) At the equator there is no longer magnetic distribution, and the friction of the cosmic matter in the air only produces a general illumination of the heavens, which may be the true cause of the brightness of tropical nights. M. Gronemann explains the fact of auroras commencing in the earlier hours of the evening and disap pearing toward midnight by the direction and mean velocity of the cosmic dust, relatively to the earth, being more favorable at that time than any other in the day. The annual variation would have a cause similar to that of the maximum of falling stars, and M. Gronemann specifies the 14th of February as regularly bringing auroras with it. The var ious electrical phenomena accompanying au roras are attributed tolilieration of electricity, through friction of dust against the air. A man with large feet should never stand upon trifles. Wits' Ends. The last rose ot winter—zeros. - Worcester Press. "Can yon spell---?" But no, we won't. We'll save it for the next mutch.-- Pittsburgh Daily Dispatch. "Hail, gentle spring!'' said Thompson; and gentle spring bailed aud snowed too.— Philadelphia '1 rm i *. The only remedy that even a Christian Ro man has against oveiflows, is to sit astride of the rjjof of bis mansion and dam them.— Rome (Ga.) fient in cl. It is noted that all great humorists arc sober and sedate, with a melancholy east of coun tenance. It is rather serious business to be funny. — Rich mon d En (j a ire r. White guest—"Yon don't mean to say you intend to occupy this bed with me?" Colored ditto—"Yes, boss, but don't 'pologize. I can stand it if you can."— Graphic. We must respectfully decline the pathetic poem ended, "I Cannot Tell a Lie.' It is too late—and it would have been too late if it had conic earlier.— Rochester Union. When a theatrical critic calls Soldent* a "Gordian shape of dazzling hue," we suppose he means to convey the idea that she's knotty as well as nice. — Providence Press. Squire Trumble, of Troy, Oakland county, has taken and read the Free I'ress continu ously for forty-three year years. He is still of tolerably sound mind. — Detroit Evening News. A Fond do Lac man watched a surgeon amputate another's frozen toe and then faint ed away, and got. half the whisky the doctor had brought for the sick man.— Chicago In ter-Ocean. A Bozeman, Montana, editor has dog on the brain. It is a phantom. This is encourag ing to us and all others who have long wished to see phantom dogs supercede every other sort.— Co urier-Jovrn al. Says a floating item*. "Every species of snake may be permanently driven away from an infested place by planting geraniums. In this connection would it be impertinent in us to suggest to the editor of the Courier-Journal tbnl ho plant u few gcrulllUU)* ill his boots?— tt. Louis Republican. Chicago policemen should be furnished with telescopes. When one of them is off duty and pursuing his old profession of house breaking, it is mighty unhandy for him to have one of his partners on the force fire at him by mistake, thinking him one of the common herd of burglars.— Milwaukee Alevs. A Flint River man waltzed into a Water street saloon yesterday atteruonu iu high spirits. "I'm on it," he exclaimed, shying his hat at the barkeeper, "higher tiia.n an Injun. I'm a mouth-slapper from lia lama zoo," and he kicked over a chair. "I'm hun gry for a black.eye," he yelled. And imme diately the populace arose and gave him the grand bounce. When he left town lit* had enough black eyes about his person to supply a cheap camp-meet in g.-BurUuyton llawkeye. They got up a surprise parly Thursday night last on a young married couple,at whose house on Sheldon street a similar affair was one of the social successes last season. The conspirators were met candy but cordially at the gate by the husband, who rested on his shot-gun, while his beautiful and accomplish ed wife, whose face and form were visible inside the porch, said she was very glad to sec them, but she didn't think she could hold the hull-dog back more than a minute longer! — Chicago Trib u n c. There is a certain Senator in Indianapolis whose wife ought to lead him home by the ear. The Sentinel will not allow him to carry on another forty days, as he has been doing, without notifying the confiding creature whom he left in charge of the Senatorial homestead. — Sentinel. The above paragraph was pub lished Thursday morning, and the grave and reverends read it over their coffee. All day a procession of Senators filed up the »' en tin el stairway, paid in a year's subscription in ad vance, and begged the proprietor for God's sake to say no more about it.— Herald. Married the Other One. The annals of Hymen contain many mean aud miserable instances. The way is per fectly disgusting iu which a fellow sometimes gets her from the other teliow, or to speak more neatly, shaineluliy snatches like a loul fiend the crystul cup oi heavenly happiness from the very lip of the luckless lover. The Clerk of Polk county, over iu Oregon, was sitting in his office, when in rushed au aident youth, and procured a license to marry a cer tain young woman. An hour passed on, when in' rushed another ardent youth and procured a license to marry the identical young woman. The first applicant went home, put on his store clothes, seized the virgin by her lily hand and hurried her breath less tothe altar. The reverend operator was about half through the joyous job, when the other young man wildly trotted up the broad aisle, waiving his license like a weapon, nod forbidding further proceedings. The parson, greatly bothered and somewhat unwilling to marry the maid to both men, compromised by refusing to marry her to either. The first young man went to consult his lawj'er. He had better have stayed w here he was. For while be wa9 talking about breaches of pro miso and injunctions and actions on the case with the attorney, at an expense of about $2 an honr, the other youmr man took the demoi selle, beautiful, blushiug, and possibly both ered and bewildered, to another parson, who solidly made them 1 until death or divorce should* make them 2. So when Primus got home with his head full of t respass ami trover and bills of equity, he found his jewel trans mogrified int«i Mr«. Number Two! What did he do under the circumstances? How should we know? D meed around and took a drink, we suppose. Swore a little, may be, and found it emollient.