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A Matter of
Discipline By DAVID If. TALMADGE (Oopjright by Authors ByudlaMe.) * I 'HE place was the fair ground of a I certain town in a certain state of tSe middle west. The time is immate rial. The occasion was the regular an nual encampment of the—th rtgiment of the certain state's national guard. Encampments of citizen soldiery are odd things conceived by a wise government on the general theory that men who sleep in tents one week dur ing each year will be better prepared, in case they are called upon for actual aerviceiu the field,to-e-ndure the expos ure and other incidentals thereto; also that the officers—more particular ly the regimental officers—will learn the requirements of successful disci pline, which is an important matter among other important matters. I deny nothing, nor do 1 affirm. But I am free to state that a regimental en campment is'One of the most entertain ing of functions. Citizen soldiery, be ing nothing more than an organized purpose to protect the commonwealth from its foes, naturally lacks its most «allant feature when there are no foes in a condition of warfare. It is quite unable to shake off in one week the •civil atmosphere by which it is sur rounded dnriug 51 weeks. Conse quently it is amusing, as everything is when it is out of its elemen t. Private O'Malley, who, it must be con fessed, looked well in uniform, ad dressed the colonel as "Bill" at those times when they chanced to meet; and the colonel, who was a good-natured •chap from whom O'Malley rented his blacksmith shop at home, was utterly unable to restrain a smile, which, of course, precluded all possibility of reprimand. "What's a man to do?" The colonel appealed to the major. They were in the colonel's quarters with a bottle between them, and they had encoun tered O'Malley in coining down the company street. "Here's O'Malley, as good a soldier as ever drew breath—" "Or double rations," growled the major. "Meets me in the company street and calls me Bill. It's contrary to regula tions. I'm the colonel of his regiment, and he is under oath to address his su perior officers as befits their rank; but, by thundeY, sir, A don't see how I'm to punish him. Suppose 1 go to him and tell him kindly that he's making a mis take. What will happen? 1 know well enough; he'll Hash up like a can of powder, and I'll be forced t-o the ne cessity of finding another renter for that building of mine, which isn't an easy thing to do; whereas, if I say nothing, the chances are that he'll buy the property within a year at my own figure." "What does your oath require of you?" asked the major, softly. The colonel frowned. "I'm perfectly well aware what I should do," he said, with sudden stiffness, for his temper was easy on the trigger; "but what I must do is a horse of another color." "Yes, yes." The major drained his glass and arose to depart. "If 1 were .you, Silsby," he said, turning at the door, "I'd enforce my authority at whatever cost, or"—his lip curled rath er unpleasantly—"I'd resign." Whereupon he was gone, and the colonel was striding back and forth «cross the tent floor spitting ana themas, for he and the major had been rivals for the colonelcy, and were now in rivalry for the love of a girl. He re covered himself presently, and sat down, laughing. "Bomley's sore as a corn," he thought, "because I'm more popular among the men than he is, and because —well. I'm sorry we happened to be to gether when we met O'Malley. It will afford him an opportunity to make a bit of capital against me—poor disci plinarian, hasn't the proper respect of the men, and all that sort of thing. It may be true, but I don't believe it. Discipline doesn't consist altogether in the exaction of titles. O'Malley hasn't the slightest notion of being insubordi nate. If he had he wouldn't call me Bill, and he'd refuse to salute. I'll do nothing about it." And he did nothing about it for two days, during which he avoided O'Malley and preserved relations of distinct frigidity towards the major. On the third day there was a sham battle. The regiment was divided into two parties, one commanded by the colonel, the other by the major. The colonel's party intrenched itself on a hill perhaps a mile from the camp, and defied the party of the major to take the position. Whereat the party of the major, in which was included the local company, stretched a portion of itself into a long line and ambled leisurely to atack, popping off its rifles now and then, and retreating at each volley from the hilltop, into the thick woods at the base. In the meantime the other portion of the party, including the local company, the captain of which was an intimate friend of the major and no friend at all of the colonel, was engaged in ex ecuting a movement which was expect ed to crown the major's brow with laurel. They were scurrying over a route, characterized by many trees and a deep railway cutting, to the rear of the position occupied by the colonel's party. The movement was nearly success ful. To Private O'Malley, who was not in either party, owing to illness, was due its failure. The hospital tent chanced to be with in comfortable earshot where the ma jor and his aides made their plana. O'Malley waited until the surgeon had gone forth to witness the battle, and then he lifted the canvas and crept out. He had no difficulty in eluding the pickets, nor in passing the line of the attacking party. "Sure," suid he, "Oi've important in formation for the colonel," and they permitted him to pass. Up the hill he went, a solitary figure, undaunted by the rifle fire. On the skirmish line he was halted, bqt only Cor an instant, lie caught one gallant rifleman under the chin, and with a carefully directed kick sent another rolling into the open. Invalid though he was, he bade fair to take the posi tion by sheer foree of his brawny arms. Fortunately, the colonel saw him be fore the entire force of skirmishers had gone to the assistance of their wounded comrades. "Here, here!" he called, riding for ward. "What's all this?" " 'Tis ownly me, Bill,'' answered O'Malley. " 'Oi've important informa tion for ye. 'Tis a dirty trick—" The colonel's nerves being on edge, he was exasperated. He motioned the others «way. "Don't call me Bill," he thundered; "call me sir. I'm the colonel of the regiment, my man." "Oh," said O'Malley, softly, after a staring interval, "is thot it? Well, the information Oi've brought is not for ye, then. 'Tis sorry I am, too, for in a little whoile yer enemy, thezJwa jor, 'll be gettin' the upper hnnu av ye, and the fame av him as a strate gist and a tictacter'll be tricklin' through the regiment as beer trickles down a dry throat, and tliot's ii re sistible. The men'll never forget how lie outwitted ye. 'Twill be talked about at home, and a certain young lady Oi'm tliinkin' av'll hear av it, and 'tis much affected she'll be, for the ladies, moind ye, loike men thot win the battles they foight. Ah, yis, 'tis sorry Oi am, upon me loife." The colonel glanciV hurriedly down the hill and to the right and to the left, but not once to the rear. He leaned forward, and something, perhaps the action, caused the blood to surge into his face. "O'Malley," he whispered, "I don't care a cuss what you call me; only tell me what you know." And O'Malley told him. It was said afterward that the man had been slightly touched by the sun, which accounted for his peculiar con duct that day, and the statement, so far as 1 know, was never disputed. When the major, already flushed with triumph, was not a quarter of a mile from the colonel's position, he was met by volley after volley of blank cartridge shots and whole sky fuis of jeering yells. He was crush ingly defeated. "The oidea," snorted Private O'Mal ley, "av thot pompous little duck thinkin' he could outwit Bill!" All of which goè's to prove in s measure what queer things encamp ments of citizen soldiery are, anc how perfectly they accomplish th* ends for which they are intended. THE OLD ORGAN. I can see it now a-standin' In the parloi prim and neat. With Its walnut case and yellow, shiny keys; With Its dark blue velvet cushion and Its music-rack complete— (Its only drawback was a rather crany wheeze.) 'Twas the first one in the neighborhood and cost a monstrous sum, An' twould even make the very rafters ring ! When Tildie pulled the stops out, 'twaa the sign for us to come— Then around the organ w# would stand and sing. And what pleasure, when the young folks, on a Sunday afternoon, Came a-traipsln' In to spend a social hour, From the other farms' around us; some wus lovers, some to spoon On the s.ofyd Some was radiant a• a flower, An' the ole folks In the sitttn' room would stop their talk awhile; Then their door open wider they would fling, An' their faces full o' sunshine oft would light up with a smile, As around the organ we would stand an' sing. You could hear Sweet and clear Our young voloes, all a-blendln'. How they rang As we sang Old-time tunes on high-ascendin', "Nellie Gray," "Far Away," "Mollie Darlln'," "Pray, Don't Tease Her," "Rock-a-Bye." "Hush, Don't Cry," "Jordan * Banks" and "Kbenescr." An' I mind one face especially, I knew In them old days; One face that's sorter dearer than the rest. 'Twas framed In Jet black ringlets, and her sweet an' winsome ways, Fairly set my heart a-throbbln' in my breast. Ofttlmes now, in the gray twillgth of my life's drear afternoon I can see her, when I gave to her the ring— I slipped it on her finger, while the others some old tune, Round the organ, they had etarted off to sing. Ofttimes now, while softly noddln' In the firelight's ruddy glow, I think that I'm a boy once again, I hear the same old voloes, kinder hum min' soft and low An' It Alls my heart with sadneec an' with pain. In my throat a lump keeps rlsln' for I'll hear 'em never more. To my ears that old sweet music naught can bring— For they're gone, the ones who made It, in the happy days of yore, When around' the organ we would stand and sing, Old-time tunes on high ascendin'. "Nellie Gray," "Far Away," "Mollie Darlln',' 1 "Pray, Don't Thw Her," "Rock-a-Bye," "Hush, Don't Cry," Banks " •"<1 "Bbeneaer." —PHU H. Armstrong. In N. T. Sun. Girl. Mr. Cropper (after the fox hunt)— Were you in at the death? Miss Annie Seed—Well, rather; ay poor old grandfather left me a quarter of a million.—Philadelphia Press. BOUND TO REVOLUTE. South American Republics Cannot Become Peaceable. ReyssUsg Rifles sii Osasoa ■are Failed to Work a Care—The Ba •Hlaa of Streaaoclty la CoastosUr at Week. «* If some of the learned scientist« who are devoting their talents to the study of germs would turn their attention to South America and the islands of the Caribbean, they might make dis coveries which would prove n blessing to mankind in that disturbed quarter of the world. Why should the South American and the West Indian take to riot and revolution as naturally as a duck does to water? asks the Baltimore Sun. Is it because they are of a fiercer and more turbulent disposition than the inhabitant« of other parte of this hemisphere, or is it because they are the victims of sinister bacilli, germs of rampant and irresistible strenuos ity? Not long ago an American savant announced that in certain part« of the United State« there is a bacillus which mnkes its way into the bodies of it« unfortunate victims and produces an invincible aversion to physical and mental activity. If there is a germ of inertia, why shoudn't there be a bacil lus of pernicious activily and misdi rected strenunsity us well? It is not fair to the South American brethren to assume that they are totally de praved; that they engage in throat cutting and other bloody diversions from pure love of doing evil. In some degree, at least, they have been under the influence of American and Euro pean civilization for a great many years. To some extent they have n troduced the forms of civilization into their governments and social institu tions. Yet. despite their ct ntr.ct with citizens of the most enlightened na tions and their commercial and diplo matic relations with Europe and the United States, they have scarcely more respect for law and order than the human race displayed in the days of primitive man. If there are bacilli in the western hemisphere indigenous to the tropical egions which incite a people against ils will and natural disposition to com mit deeds ( f violence and murder • avants ought to be able to find a rtni dy. The antidote commonly used in nses of pernicious strenuosity has not roved a success. Repeating rifles, nyonets and cannon have failed to vork a cure. When the South Auver ean has introduced the germs of revo ution and riot into his body nothing ■vill deter him from stirring up trou de—not even the fear that he will lie lint or bayoneted to death. When he .s under the influence of the bacillus of strenuosity—and that seems to be a chronic condition with him—heis like ihe Malay fanatic who runs amuck, Killing right and left. The scientist vlio discovers the remedy for this dis ease will deserve much of mankind, ■t would be one of the greatest tri tmphs of this century if the ever-war 'ing inhabitants of the Latin-Amer can republics and of Hayti were in oculated with t-he bacilli of slothful less and reduced to a slate of innoc uous inactivity. The implements of war have failed to produce the desired result. Now let science take n hand and if possible transform the turbu ,ent folk of the tropics into peaceful and law-abiding citizens of the new world. CALCUTTA'S SUBTLE CHARM. rMelMtloi of the Indian City Where th« Boddens Knli Is Devoutly Worshiped. The charm of Calcutta works slowly, and, apart from government house and its garden, there is nothing which at once, rushing in as certain atmos pheres do, fills the imagination, and there is nothing which, by enchanting grace or .romantic history, at once st-irs the mind. But the charm is the more enduring, perhaps, because it is sc slow, so unassertive, so uncommon. Calcutta, in fact, may be compared with the subtle women of history whose portrait« in state galleries leave us wondering how they altered the fates ot empires and consumed the hearts of men. Its founder, Job Char nock, was, we are told, "not a beauti ful person; he was a block of rough hewn British manhood, always a faith ful man to the East India company." In the year 1690—more than 160 years after the Portuguese had first cast an chor in the Hooghly—Charnock, with 30 sullen followers, who confused the very name of the place with Golgotha, climbed the eastern banks to the three ruined mud hut« which made up the cotton thread bazaar of Sutaneti. Its swampy land slopes away into a forest path which led to the shrine of Kali— Kali the indefinable and obscene god 1 des« of destruction, with a black face, three eyes (symbolizing the present, the past and the future) ; a long gilt tongue hanging out of her mouth; four arms; her clothing a garland of men's skulls. The forest path has been cleared away, the jungle and th« marshes are now built upon, but Kali is still worshiped; goat« and kids are sacrificed to her daily; men and wom en prostrated on the ground worship her till the priest) closes the door of her temple each night. It is almost im possible to discover just what is felt about, and feared, and, it may be, loved in Kali, says John Oliver Hobbes, in (jollier's Weekly. She ie there, and she remains, with her hietory and her secreta and her power, eternally mys terious, eternally baffling, a world of symbols to the metaphysician, a men ace to the ignorant, » reality to the despairing. I SCIENCE AND INDUSTRY. \\ a Light passes from the moon to the earth in one and one-quarter seconds. The Spanish ship to the United Slates each autumn 300,000 barrels of Almeria grapes. Germany has 31 firms manufacturing fuel briquettes. These make 1,650,000 tons between them every year. Only 49,746 acres of flax were grown in Ireland last year. This is a decrease of 10.3 per cent, on the figures for 1901. Steps were taken recently toward forming in Paris a Canadian chamber of commerce to extend commercial re lations between France and Canada. The total value of the seals and whales taken last year by British ves sels was about $162,000. Whalebone now fetches as much at* $12,500 per ton. Barges are towed on the Elbe by means of a chain 290 miles long, which lies at the bottom of the river, and is grappled and raised by steum machin ery. A few year» ago the United States exported all its cotton. Last year, out of a total crop of 9,000,000 bales, it kept for home manufacture over 4,000,000, of which northern mills are using 2 , 200 , 000 . Hamburg has 148 chemical manufac turing establishment«, employing in all 4,669 persons. Borax, sulphuric acid, matches, fireworks, czutphor, gehiiine, ether and chloroform are a few of the various articles turned out. Knife and fork surgery is the name given by the hospital to a new method of Koeing, of Berlin, by which he avoids tilt- dangers of contaminating wounds by putting his fingers in them. The surgeon performs many operations without ever touching the tissues, much as we eat our meals by aid of forks and spoons instead of clawing our food. By practice with suitably devised metal instruments which, of course, are capable of complete steril ization, he has found that he can get through very many operations, even that for appendicitis in the quiescent interval, without ever touching the wound. HELP THE WEAK CONCERNS. Solid New York Banka Frequently Go to th» Assistance of Shaky Financial lnatUutiona. Development« of late have given un usual interest to the methods followed by important New York banks in as sisting- crippled business concerns. Every now and then u hurried confer ence is called to prevent the suspension of some house whose operations are extensive enough to afl'ect business in terests disastrously were its failure announced. In such an •instance half a dozen bankers are usually assembled and the situation thoroughly dis cussed. If the concern ha.- ;.szet s suffi cient to meet its liabilities it is gener ally allowed to continue in business; if not, it goes to the wall, says the New York Post. In outlining the usual procedure a Wall street banker whose advice is sought by powerful interests every where when a failure is imminent, said: "The aim always is to save a firm if failure can be prevented without as suming undue risks. In this respect the community of interests idea has been developed remarkably, for the 'cut throat' policy of asserting one's rights irrespective of what happens to the other creditors is nowadays sel dom followed. "The work is difficult, however, and calls for clean-headed management to overcome in a few months the compli cations and mistakes of years. It usually takes from one to three years to put a crippled concern on its feet again. The process involves a com plete overhauling of ihe accounts and necessitates shaking out the dry rot which lias crept into the estaidish nient. I think that fully 60 per cent, of such oases result from outside spec ulation, about 15 per cent, from incom petent management. My experience has always been that- where it man at tends strictly tohis own business with out engaging in outside ventures of any kind he is seldom in need of hank ing assistance. His business booms itself. "Of course there are times when the banks find- it impossible to extend the assistance they would very much like to afford. Such cases are usually en countered when a firm's assets are tied up and no sufficient margin exists to furnish a free and clear basis on which to work out its salvation. Then, too, a corporation's affairs present some times such a tangled mass as to make it very difficult or scarcelyiworth while to resuscitate it." j I ' Danger In Mountain Climbing. Danger is by no means an attrac tion to the true mountaineer. Some people may so affirm, but scarcely ever does an expert place himself in a dan gerous situation, and if he does it is not from choice, and he does not like it. Sometimes he may take a risk, but sel dom, unless all the chances nre in favor of the climbing party and the possibil ity of accident exceedingly remote. What he does love is to eliminate by experience and skill all danger from a climb, which, to a novice, a clumsy worker or a party unsupplied with or neglecting to use proper equipment for mountaineering, would be hazard ous or quite Impossible.—Leslie's Monthly. ■ he H*l to ««ereader. "I've refused George twice," she said, "but it's no use." "No use!" "Not «bit. He believes in predestine* tion." "What has that to do with it?" "Why, he thinks I'm predestined tc be his wife, and of course, if that is so I'll simply have to give in, no matte! what papa says. He can't expect m< to defy Fate."—Chicago Post. I " \\ TYPEWRITER TESTS. Every Machine Made in the United States Tried by Government. Bsksaitlve Examination! Given Back j Production and It In Then Sold •I Anctlon—No Favoritism Shown. Every typewriting machine made in the United States is given a trial by I the United States government. There is an unwritten rule to that effect to encourage American invention and me chanics. All the various departments in Washington and every navy yard throughout the country arc supplied with the latest production of the type writing maker. The trial given each type of machine is an exhaustive one, and continues until the machine is so far gone as to be unworthy of repair. Then it is sold at auction initier sealed bitls, with the countless other auxili aries of department or bureau that are put tip at auction at regular periods, says a Washington report. It is claimed that no favoritism is shown in these experiments, although certain types which have been in use for years in the various departments are more extensively patronized than those of which comparatively little is known. The machine of one company is found in nearly every department and at every navy yard, and also on the majority of warships, but this is said to be due to the fact that it is a superior machine, and its service has never been found wanting. At the navy yard in Brooklyn, there are six machines of the one make in addition to dozens of others that are on pro bation or fully tritd. A ma -bine nu ll ss unusually laid is never comlemnt il until it breaks down absolutely, and even when more or less satisfied that the make of the machine is not of 1ltt best, the heads of departments in variably give the inventor another chance by buying a second machine. Some manufacturers have been known to offer their machine free in the hope that they tnighl receive more consideration at the hands of govern ment employes, but these attempts at influencing those who decide upon the machines have always failed. In the majority of Ihe departments regular ' reports ns to the advantages, disad vantages, usage, duration of service and other details nre furnished from time to time by those who operate the machines. These reports do not apply to those machines that are made by firms whose workmanship has been un der observation for years. The newer makes only come in for an earnest sub ject of investigation. At lite auction stiles of typewriting machines discarded by the government the prices received are frequently so low as to cause gen ral surprise onthe part of those who are not aware that there was such a sale until it had taken place. Machines have gone for $5 and even $2. One sold at the latter price two years ago was resold for a better figure to a Manhattan business man, who has had if steadily at work ever since. It is still in firsl-class order. Tlte government has no room or offi cial pal ience t o keep damaged or worn out typewriting machines, and this is one of the chief reasons for their oc casional sale at what may seem low prices. The government does not in vest in machines of foreign make, but will buy for experimental purposes and final adoption if found to be-serv iceable any new make put on the mar ket. READING THE FUTURE. How Fortune-Teller* Work Thalr Craft and Peer Into the Hidden Mystenisai of Life. "Ever since Saul proved the incon sistency of man by rushing off to con sult. the Witch of Kudor after taking severe measures to exterminate witch craft, there has been a universal crav ing to pierce the veil that hides from us tile good and evil of the future," says a writer in the Ladies' Field. "The craving for the knowledge of what the future holds is turned to ac count by thousands of persons in every generation, who claim super natural powers of vision and prophecy. Astrology is perhaps the most im pressive form of so-called 'divination' —possibly there is something inspir ing in the thought of one's destiny be ing guided by a star. But there is noth ing sublime about a greasy pack oi cards in the stuff.) parlor of a houst in a dingy street, which is the environ ment of the modern sybil. Yet every day her rooms are crowded with silly women, whose carriages wait round the corner while they themselves sit shivering in rows for their turn to have their destinies revealed to them They don't really believe in it, of course —they will tell you laughingly-—'but it is such fun, and' she does really tell you the most extraordinary things'— which, of course, she does when you have given her the clew. After having told your character and thoroughly taken in your characteristics at the same time, the fortune teller invari ably tells you to 'ask any question you like.' This request, if acceded to, nat urally shows her a basis to work upon. She will occasionally go wrong, but if you correct her she will speedily get back on the right tack, and with a lit tle assistance, which the credulous generally give her, she succeeds in telling you exactly what you expected, xnd you go away feeling that «he i« indeed a marvelous person." Am Optlnlrti "He's an optimist." "Indeed?" "Yea; he think« he get« handsomer as he grows older."—Detroit Free Pres*. A Blue-Sky Balia#.; 'Hang sorrow! Care will kill a cat*. And therefore let's be merry." ^ Though Fate may spill some milk, there still Is lots more in the dairy. But granting that there were no more. Why growl about our lot or Feel sore distressed, since milk at best Is more than four-fifths water. The true philosopher is one Who wastes no time in fretting O'er ome fine peaeli oeyond his reach, But likes the fruit lie's f ' , , So let's be wise in our aalflrs, And cleverly beguiling Dante Fortune's frown, go up and down This good old world a smiling. —Nixon Weterman in July Woman's Home C( mpanion. Call for Bids. County Clerk's office, Hamilton. Mon tana, July 1st, 1903. Notice is hereby given, that the undersigned will receive sealed bids for the painting of the following bridges, in Ravalli county. Montana, to-wit: The Eight Mile, Stevensville, Vic tor, Corvallis, Hamilton, Grantsdale, Cou.o, Lost Horse, Sorenson, Rattle snake, Edwards, Saw Tooth, Rock Creek and Fern Creek bridges The above work shall consist of one and two coats of a good quality of mineral paint, mixed with a good quality of boiled linseed oil, and on those bridges not painted, there will be required two (2) coats of the above specified paint; and on the bridges which are now painted, there will be required one (1) coat of the above specified paint. All painting to be done in a good and workmanlike manner, and to the satisfaction of the board of county commissioners, or its agent. Said bids to be received on or before July 20th. 1903, at 10 o'clock a. tn. The board reserves the right to re ject any or all bids. C. M. Johnson, County Clerk. Call for Special Meeting of Board of County Commissioners County Clerk's office, Hamilton, Montana, July 1st, 1903. Notice is hereby given, That the board of commissioners of Ravalli county, Montana, will convene in special session on Monday, July 20th, 1903, at 9 o'clock a. m., for the follow ing purposes to-wit: To meet as a county board of equali zation; to equalize and adjust the tax list as returned by the assessor; to re ceive bids for the reconstruction of the ■»no, S. Chaffin bridge and also for painting the several bridges (as adver tised) throughout the county,and if said are satisfactory, to let contracts there for. And for any and all road busi ness, or other things which may be considered necessary and proper to be done at that time. By order of the board of commis sioners. C. M. Johnson, County Clerk. Idaho cedar posts for sale by A. C. M. Co. 52 tf Magni & Harvey have just received their spring stock of wall paper which includes the latest and most beautiful designs. Call and see them. 22tf NURSERY STOCK, HOME GROWN Don't overlook the fact that the Missoula Nursery Co. are the largest growers of nursery stock in the north west. Write for our catalogue at once or place your order with our traveling agents. 7tf Cheap for Cash. Eight acres of ground mostly ia high state of cultivation, well watered; 300 fruit trees; comfortable four-room cottage; goes cheap for cash. Apply at The Western News office. 30-tf Austrian Army Suicide«. Statistic." of suicide in the Austro Hungarian army tell a dark story Even among the civilian population ot I hat empire tlte percentage of suicide is high —1.03 per 10.000 inhabitants, aa against 0.76 in England, though still lower than Germany, whose percent age is 2.71. Austrian army suicide«, however, are equal to those of any three European armies put together. England's- army of free men does not weary of its own existence. Tlte per centage is 2.06 per 10,000, while in the Austrian army it rises to 12.53, even double t hat of t lie German army, which may be described ns a bad second, with a rate of 6.33.—Indianapolis News. "The Widow'« ,fnu»." The Sunday school superintendent was quizzing a class of small girls the other day: "And what was 'the widow's crus«?''*• he asked. There was a moment's silence; then a little hand went np timidly: "1'lease, sir," said the youngster, "the widow was one of the people that went with Noah in his yacht."— N. Y. Times. O«» on tit* Jud«». His Honor—I'm going to make an ex» ample of you by committing you a«« nuisance. Tired Tatter*—You«# dassent, jedge. "Why not?" " 'Cause its agin de law ter commit er nuisance. Dat's why."—Chicago Daily New».