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Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, January 17, 1900, Image 3

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O thefittl. olA town that I left om day,
Because it was quiet, stilt
Has the same that it bad when I went
And stands on the same old hill
But the ones that were dear in the little
old town,
With its one wide street running up and
'..Have ceased to sit ou the porches where
The roses were trained to climb
They hare ceased to sew and to whittle
.* there,
As they did in the dear old time.
The little old church with Its wooden
r- sheds OT
Still stands as it stood of yore
But the ones who knelt' and who bowed
their heads
•afel' Are worshiping there no morel
"ffjP And the little old school where 1 carved
my name
(i On the home-made desk stauds just the
*-But, the boys who are batting the ball
And the little mhlds, fair aud f^ee.
Are not the children who- used to play
On the common there with me!
The little old house, so dear, so dear,
Stands just where it used to Stand
c.»: B»it not for many and many a year
vv Has the latch obeyed her hand—
The hand in which hand was laid
AVhcn my first* few faltering steps were
And in the little old pnrlor there,
O'erlooking the little lawn.
Another sits in her easy chair
And hears the clock tick on.
O the little old town that I left one day.
Because it was quiet, still
vgaHas the name that it bad when 1 went
And atands on the same old hill
But the friends that I've traveled "back
home*' to see
Are gone or else are but strangers to me.
Aud over the doors of the little old stores
Are names that I never kuew,
And the dream that was dear of the "old
home" here
Can never, alas! come true.
Chicago Times-Herald.
8 Gltano walked through tlie
MV lowland grove to meet Leonlta
-^*^at the creek he wondered why
V:.«iSsshe had grown so different why she
^ipno longer would play the games tbat
for years they had played together
why she now went round by the bridge
and would not let him assist lier across
th« stream.
When he reached the open Jie saw
.. her standing by the road at the top of
the hill. A horseman who had spoken
with her rode away, smiling over his
'. shoulder. Something tightened in Ul
a no's breast. With tlrm steps he
came to the hill top.
"Who was he, 'Nlta 7"
"Who but the Corregidor," she au
swored archly.
"What said he?"
"More than ever another liath said,
"What then?"
Leonlta turned her face away.
.. "He said that mine is the beauty of
the night."
Gitano's eyes flashed at the receding
:. horseman.
"Why of the .night?" he asked.
"Because,-' she faltered, "because—
no said the Corregidor—my brow Is the
moon-touched snow upon the moim
tain, and my eyes are" the glinting
"Said be that? What more?"
"That my hatr'ls the midnight eland
"that my lips
She tilrned a pebble with her dainty
"That my Hps tiltauo prompted.'
"Are the dew-bright berries of holly
awaiting the kiss of dawn—so said lie,
the Corregidor."
At the bend of the road the rider
looked back and raised his gllstealng
BomUrero. Leonlta waved lier supple
band and smiled. But when she turn
f'id again to her companion the umlte
I /'departed from her lips, for the sad
ness of his eyes rebuked her heart.
The next day and the next the rider
came, but Leonlta was ever away with
Gltano In the lowland grove.
Then, as the third day closed, her
father snld to her:
"'Nlta, thou art too much with Gl
tano. Let him go his way. Thou art
no longer a child."
But, my father, I am happy •with
So much the worse. BUle thee at
home. The Corregidor will come
"The Corregidor?"
"Ay, *Nita he bath Been thy tieau
i} 1,
"What dost thou mean, my father?"
"Only that thy place is liere. Let
|i Gltano go his way."
ig Another day the rider came, and
and when he went away Leoolta's
face was in her bands.
"Silly child!", her father said. "Thou
-S wilt be the Corregldora—a great lady,
and ride in thy coach. Is this thy
gratitude for a father's loving care?"
y? Gltano came at sundown to learn
why Leonlta had not kept their dally
tryst Her futher sat with them and
Re told Gltano all—that the Corregidor
had smiled upon her beauty and beg
.'i ged her for his bride that the lather's
promise had been given that the not
nry was to come next morning to seal
the troth, and that until then Xeonlta
.2 was to remain within.
Gltano heard as lu a dream. The
.* words seemed to come over Bome vast
distance—even from sotne llglitless
world whose fli'es had flickered out
ages and ages ago. But as her father
spoke Leonlta weaved message of
the thread upon her lap and treaiUed
with excited joy to see -Gltano rend it.
7 moon was low, wtnen a call as of
a ghtblrd fell softly through Leoal
tal lattice.
"•'.* itano!"
'•V '"Nltfi!"
Cheek to cheek, they wlugpered from
•/:, their hearts, and in the meeting of
.. their lips were seated pathetic vows
of love beyond this lite.
Then through the somber avenue of
silence they came again to view the
gloomy present
"And spoke he only of the beauty of
thy face?" Oltano asked.
5 "Only of that," she answered.
••k "I would thou hadst no Ueanty,
Before they5 parted at the lattice
Leonlta begged one last memento of
his honest love. A lush young vine
grew in the withered gumtree- at the
bottom of the. gorge.
"Bring me a sprig of that,. GiUno,
And wjhen Bhe took It fromt htm she
bade him haste to bathe his. hands In
,i milk. Then Gltano knew the cruel
nature of the vine.
"No, no! Not that!" he cfried.
But tb^e lattice window -closed.
In the po- ^g light tlies father look
on Lijor
face and, horror pafed
bis own.W
'"Nltn!" he gasped, "Is it thee—my
"Ay, my father thy child."
He swayed and closed his eyes.
"Say not so," he moaned. "It can
not be! My Xina was so beautlful—
oh, so beautiful!"
In overwhelming grief ho sank upon
the floor and rocked feebly and boat
his breast.
"O santo Dlos! What curst Is this?"
Then came auother awful thought.
"The Corregidor will never take her
now!" he cried.
"Why, my father? Doth he love' me
for my face alone?"
But the father only walled as one
gone mad
."The Corregidor! The Corregidor!
He will not have her now!"
Then came the rider with the notary.
"She was so much a child," the fa
ther sobbed. "She played with young
Gltano in the grove. She did not know
the devil-vlne would eat her beauty.
And yet It hath but spoiled her face
and not touched her beauteous heart."
"Rustlco," said the great Corregi
dor, "thou hilst uiy earnest sympathy.
Here Is a purse of golil."
And with his iiolary he rode away.
When Gltano with his scalded hands
smoothed Leoultn's lialr his tears ex
pressed his heart.
••Still thou art beautiful." he said.
"Nay, sweet Gltano, even thou canst
not say that."
"Hush, my 'Nlta! Thine Is the beau
ty of the day. Thy heart-love Is the
glad, warm sunshine and thy glorious
soul the rainbow of promise to me."—
Chicago Times-Herald.
It Wu. Very Vigorous, and He Found
Out Why.
The Judge had never taken a Turkish
bath, but he was not feeling liis best
that morning, aud it suddenly occurred
to him to test Its vivifying effects, so
enthusiastically descanted upon by his
youug rrlends.
It seemed to othe Judge that the rub
ber was terribly rough, b-.it fearing to
expose ills inexperience and subject
himself to ridicule by objecting to the
regular treatment, he patiently endured
being punched, pnmmeled, slapped,
spanked, whacked and poked until he
could not stand the torture a moment
—me—bla-ack—and blue—-all or
ver?" panted the Judge, as Irregularly
as the rubber dug his lists lu more or
less vigorously.
"Never you mind I'm flxin' you." re
sponded the rubber, redoubling his as
saults and griuulng diabolically—at
least so it seemed to the Judge.
"Who (slap, groan) are (tlrad, groan)
you?" gasped the Judge, a horrible sus
picion dawning in his mind. "Your
(whacky groan) face (thump, groan)
does (ivhack, groan) look (slap, groan)
fa thud,, groan) miliar" (swish,
"Oh, you remember me, do you?"
growled the rubber sarcastically.
"Well, lash yer old hide, mebbe you'd
like to send me up for six mouths again
for prlicrllghtin'!"—Harper's.Magazine.
Always tho Way.
A woman, with a freshly blackened
eye aud traces of recent tears on her
face, came hurriedly Into a police mag
istrate's office one morning, and asked
for the arrest of her husband ou a
charge of beating her.
The brutal husband was arrested and
brought before the malgstrate. He
was a hard-looking citizen, large of
frame, repulsive In appearance, and
about three-fourths drunk. The wife,
on the contrary, was slight and deli
cate, and her hands were wrinkled and
knotted with hard work.
The trial was short. "Bill," as she
called him, made no defense. He was
apparently too lazy to tajce the trouble.
The wife hud cooled down consider
ably, and gave lier testimony with ex
treme reluctance, as Is the custom In
such cases but the guilt of the pris
oner was clearly established, and the
magistrate, after lecturing him sharply
and Indignantly ou his brutality, was
about to prescribe the necessary pun
ishment, when the pale-faced victim
spoke up.
"Make the fine as light as you can,
your honor," she said, anxiously. "I'll
have to pay It."
A Model Witness. ^3,"'
During the Investigation of the Maine
disaster an old seaman was called be
fore the Court of Inquiry to tell what
he knew about It. He was solemnly
sworn to tell the truth nud nothing but
the truth furthermore, he was cau
tioned not to repeat hearsay his per
sonal experience was the only testi
mony that would answer the law.
"And now tell us what you know
about the explosion of the Maine," said
one of the officers.
"Well, sir," snld tlie old bluejacket,
"I was a-corking it off In me 'ammick
(hammock), and 'eard a noise and
waked up In the 'orspltal. That's all I
know about it, sir."
The coiirt maintained Its gravity,
states the Chicago Record, from which
this story is taken, and dismissed the
"Corking," It may be added, Is sailor
slang for Bleeping. When they lie down
upon the deck, as they often do for a
nap, figuratively speaking they are
calking the deck.
A Congressman's Mother.
Mrs. Turner, mother of the young
Democratic member from Kentucky,
became separated at the capltol from
her son, who had her ticket for the
members' gallery In his pocket. The
rules were strictly enforced and al
though she gained admittance to the
gallery the zealom doorkeeper threat
ened that if she did not produce her
ticket be would be compelled to ask her
to step out.
"No," said Mrs. Turner, "I shall not
move a step. I came here to see my
baby sworn In as a iflember of the
House, and I am going to see him
sworn in. I have lost him and I have
no ticket, but I shall not move a step,
from here until I see him take the
Tho doorkeeper, being a wise man,
sttld nothing further, and Mrs. Turner
bad the happy privilege of seeing her
son sworn Into office.—New York Trib
A Murderer's Black Cap.
When John Carroll was hanged re
cently at Atlanta for the murder of a
woman, be wore the black cap which
he had made for the occasion by his
Consumptive Convicts.
It is said by an Alabama newspnper
tliat one-half of the pardons issued In
that State are based on the fact that
the convict Is suffering from consump
Largest Public Debt.
The public debt of France Is the larg
est In the world, and amounts to
At 2 cents a mile a trip to the sun
would cost $1,828,604.40. We under
stand there will be no cut-rate ezcur
slons this season.
Gov. Shaw's bioimial message was de
livered to the State Legislature on Tues
day. The Governor, according to his
message, lit wis State linancos and
various State affairs in a very sat
isfactory condition. Never in our
history, tbe message says, has labor found
more ready employment or more liberal
remuneration never has agriculture gen
erally been more prosperous or yielded
better returns, aud never has business
been more universally active or reasonable
profits for invested capital more secure.
Liberal extracts from the important parts
of the message are given:
It is gratifying to kuow that the judi
cious provisions made by the Twenty*
sixth and Twenty-seventh General As
semblies, for the increase of public reve
nues on the one hand, anil the reduction
of expenditures on the other, enabled the
State to meet all its obligations, past
and current, and to accumulate in the
treasury, at the end of the fiscal terjn
under review, a surplus of $414,2i)4.02
over and above all outstanding warrants,
subject, however, to the yet unexpended
appropriations of the Twenty-seventh
and earlier General Assemblies. Of
these les3 than $200,000 remained un
drawn at the end of the fiscal term. With
these amounts all expended, there will
remain fully $22,000 to meet the expendi
tures of the current term.
The treasury is in better condition than
It was two years ago by $
The surplus of $537,259.*J7 is subject to
reduction by the special appropriations
yet undrawn of past general assemblies,
amounting to less than $100,000. The
auditor of State estimates the receipts
for the current term at $4,504,200 and
the expenditures, without any special
appropriations made by the Twenty
eighth General Assembly, Ht $.1,577,423
giving a surplus of receipts for the cur
rent term of $080,777. Adding to this
sum the balance of $220,000 cash in the
treasury at the end of the fiscal term in
excess of outstanding demands and un
drawn appropriations, gives fully $1,200,
000, which this General Assembly cau
safely appropriate for special purposes.
Iowa has more bauks than auy other
State in the Union, and the condition of
these institutions is very encouraging.
At the date of the reports of incorporat
ed banks nearest the first jt October,
1807, the bank deposits of Iowa were as
State uud savings banks....$ 50,491,r»2."» til
National bauks 27,302,301 25
Private banks (estimated)... 2.",000,000 00
Total fl02.003.826 80
At tbe date of their last reports, the de
posits were as follows:
State aud savings banks $ 81,476,701 6?
Nationnl banks 42.238.700 lh
Private banks (estimated)... 40.000.000 00
Total $lC3.71o,5CO 8T»
An increase of over 00 per cent. In two
Of tbe more than $110,000,000 held by:
national. State and private bauks. inves-,
tigation convinced me that certainly over
one-half is owned bjr farmers and the'
$51,000,000 on deposit in savings banks
is held almost exclusively by wage earn
ers and people of limited income. Un
questionably the proportion of unincum
bered farms in the State exceeds that' of
any other period. In addition, the value
of all agricultural lands and of farm
animals has very materially appreciated
within the last few years.
Under these favorable conditions, 1
thiuk the Twenty-eighth General Assem
bly will be justified in making somewhat
more liberal appropriations than in for
mer years. Great care, however, should
be exercised, for it must be borne in mind
that it is easier for a State, as well as
for an individual, to incur a liability than
to discharge one.
Board of Control.
The Twenty-seventh General Assembly
made provision for a board of control,
which, for nearly two years, has had the
management of all our State institutions,
excepting those purely educational. Tbe
policy thus inaugurated has resulted in a
very considerable saving to the State,
and in addition the service at most of the
Institutions, I am persuaded, has been
improved. To justify the board of con
trol system, it is not necessary to defend
each separate act. or to indorse the pol
icy of the board in every particular. If
errors have been committed, the lessons
taught thereby will not need repeating.
Time will strengthen that which is weak,
and experience will supply whatever may
be wanting.
The report of the board is so full and
comprehensive that it will not be neces
sary for me to refer to our several elee
mosynary, penal and reformatory instl
tutions. in detail.
Great rare should be exercised that
the revenues of the State be not wasted
but while this is true, the unfortunate
inmates of our hospitals for the insane,
the institution for the feeble minded, the
college and the industrial home for the
blind, the school for the deaf, the sol
diers* orphans' home, and especially the
soldiers' home, should be cared for—not
lavishly, but liberally. The people of
the State will approve a policy that in
sures ample food and suitable clothing
for the inmates of all these institution^
and the employment of teachers, where
required, the equal in qualification and
aptness with those engaged by public
school boards to iustruct the more fortu
nate. The dominant sentiment of Iowa
is favorable to good wages, and the State
should not by example teach private cor
porations lessons in economy at the ex
pense of labor. All that the people of
the State of Iowa require is 1(H) cents in
service for each dollar expended, and no
one need ever expect more. The board
of control will neither squander nor reck
lessly expend any appropriation the Gen
eral Assembly may pkve at its disposal.
The several institntions under the con
trol of the board have in the aggregate
4,181) acres of land, valued at $300,S40.
The buildings thereon are valued ot $7,
482,735, and the persoual property at
$597,134.77, making a total of $8,380,
718.77. There were being cared for at
these institujjons June 30,'?£9!), 0,080
There was expended during the
period for the support of In
mates ....*2,114,010 75
For Improvement to bulldlugA
and grounds 452.053 80
Total expenditures of the
term $2,567,273 55
Of the support fund $l,M8.12if.80 was ex
pended the flrat and $000,102.05 the second
year of the biennial period—a difference ot
1181,033.85 in favor of t*re lust your of the
Public Schools.
The public school &y«tem of Iowa has
had many eucotuiums pronounced upon
it, and needs none from me. To say that
It wos never better, or that uo State in
the Union has ever pursued a wiser pol
icy, is not equivalent to saying that ours
cannot be improved. To say that It has
accomplished great things for the people
of our State does not imply that' it can
not be made more etiicicut. Within the
memory of persous now living, women
were denied a college education. A revo
lution has been wrought in these matters
and, while no one would return to former
conditions, yet a system which results iu
the graduation of 1,830 youug todies from
the high schools of Iowa tbe current
year, aud only 054 young gentlemen, is
weak at a vital point. These gradua
tions are from town und eity schools, for
rural districts do not generally afford
high school privileges.
That town and city schools are superior
to those iu rural districts will be readily
observed as &oon as tbe policy pursued
by cach is compared. In several coun
ties of the State the experiment has
been tried of maintaining a central town
ship graded school, to and from which
the pupils are conveyed in 'carriages, at
public expense. Wherever this plan has
been adopted the results have been most
jitiifactory. The enrollment has been
thereby invariably increased, flud the at
tendance has been more regular better
teachers have been employed, with cor
rspondingly improved scholarship, and in
addition the expenses have been very
considerably reduced. This is the expe
rience also of other States where the
practice has become quite general. 1
think this plan should be encouraged by
specific legislation. 1 am not prepared to
advise that, at present, it Je mode uni
versal. It is probable that the erection
of no more single room subdlstricf school
houses should be permitted. Some en
couraging legislation should, I think, be!
enacted looking toward the establishment
of graded schools within easy access of
every farm in Iowa. The vocation of
the farmer, which is so admirably adapt
ed for reariug industrious and therefore
self-supportiug children, must not become
offensive because of the want of school
Normal Schools.
The foregoing observations uoturally
lead to the question of normnl schools.
Iowa possesses one such institution under
State control and. management. This
has facilities to reasonably accommodate
six hundred pupils. During the last year
the attendance has averaged over one
thousand. A better class of studeuts
never congregated. They aro not sent to
the State Normal School in the fond hope
that they may develop into something,
at some time, but they come voluntarily
and many of them at their own expense,
with the settled purpose to make men aud
women of themselves, to take their places
in the battle of life, and to boar their
share of^the world's burdens. The school
is grossly overcrowded. I do not believe
its capacity ought to be materially in
creased. There is a limit in number over
which an instructor can exercise, a per
sonal influence. From seven to eight hun
dred pupils is, in my opinion, the maxi
mum for any one normal school. 1 should
be glad to see a State normal establish
ed ou each of the great truuk railways
of Iowa. I think it would be better to
locate them thus than to follow geograph
ical divisions, for the reason that dis
tance is not so important a factor as ac
cessibility. Five normal schools will not
be an oversupply for Iowa. Massachu
setts has ten, New York twelve, Penn
sylvania thirteen. Wiscousin, with a less
population thau Iowa, has four, nnd Illi
nois is building her fifth.
In tbe absence of some affirmative leg
islation looking to the speedy establish
ment of more normal schools under State
control, 1 think some encouragement
should be extended to private aud de
nominational colleges that are now main
taining, or that may elect to maintain, a
normal department the equivalent in
grade to that established by the State.
Sly contention is that the rural districts
require, and nre entitled to the services
of, as good teachers as towns and cities.
If this demand shall be even partially
met, increased facilities of some kind are
State University.
The Genera! Assembly will, of course,
carefully examine tho report and rec
ommendations of the board of regents of
the State University. Here substantial
appropriations are also asked, aud are
much needed. I think it can be safely
said that no university has ever accom
plished more with such limited means.
Certainly, no mouey has been squander
ed, and the results have been phenome
nal. In view of the existence of a large
number of denominational institutions in
the State, most of them furnishing excel
lent opportunities for the acquisition of
what may be called a collegiate education,
It would seem to me unwise to leave our
State university a university in aiaine
only, but a college in fact. Professional
departments do not differentiate a col
lege and a university. The State should
provide that which private enterprise and
philanthropy do not. The State univer
sity should be made the center around
which all publie and denominational
schools and colleges shonld cluster, and
it 6bouid be able to furnish the gradu
ates from all these institutions university
advantages. The people of Iowa are pre
pared, iu my opinion, to welcome a new
era of university influence. This can be
brought about only by a more liberal pol
icy, which will be found conservatively
outlined in the report of the board of re
Nebraska expends annually over $280,
000 in smport ot its university Minne
sota and Illinois each expends over $350,
000 Wiscousin over $4(h),000 and Mich
igan over $500,000 while'the annual in
come of the State University of Iowa is
$150,038. Iowa cannot compete with
other States without fearlessly meeting
the conditions.
College of Agriculture.
From information received from the
highest authority, I uin convinced that
the College of Agriculture and Mechanic
Arts of Iowa comes nearer conforming
to ihc purposes contemplated in tbe act
of Congress, appropriating land in aid
thereof, thau any similar institution in
the United States. It is not easy to over
estimate its value to the State and na
tion. The art of farmiug is quite well
understood and practiced, but the science
of agriculture is yet in-its infancy. Mod
ern inventlou has revolutionized methods,
out it has uot modified or affected the
philosophy of animal or plant life. There
are ^ousands of men in the State who
have learned from observation and ex
perience how to feed a steer, or a pig,
so as to produce beef and pork at a profit
of from ten to twenty-five per cent a
somewhat less number have learned in
similar ways to feed a cow so as to pro
duce milk and butter at a profit of from
twenty to fifty per cent but there are
comparatively few who scientifically un
derstand the essential elemeuts required
for the production of bone aud muscle
and fat und milk and butter aud fewer
still who know how to feed the rich soils
of Iowa so as to afford 100 per 'it of
profit ou the cost of fertilization, .hese
subjects are all taught and practically
demonstrated at our College of Agricul
ture and Mechanic Arts. The future of
agriculture, therefore the future of Iowa,
is most promisiug Tlieorv is not always
practical, but truth is. Whatever is prac
tical is philosophically correct, and what
ever is scientifically true must of neces
sity be practical. An experiment sta
tiou is maintained at our College of Ag
riculture and Mechanic Arts, where the
ories are put to practical tests, and the
results are published for the information
of the farmers of our State thus beue
titiug not only the pupils, but all who will
take the trouble to read the bulletins.
I think the recommendations of the
board ot trustees are conservative, and
.that a special tax of oue-tenth of a mill
per annum for five years for improve
ments can be safely granted. I have uo
question as to the wisdom of a special
tax of three-tenths of a mill for purposes
of advanced education. One-tenth of a
mill each for uorrnal schools, for the
university and for the College of Agri
culture and Mechanic Arts, will place
these schools in greatly improved condi
tion at the end of five years, and will
avoid appropriations iu anticipation of
1 recommend that a legislative grant
be made of all the lake-beds that have,
or that may hereafter, become dry, eith
er to the State University or to the State
College of Agriculture and Mechanic
Arts or perhaps better still to both these
institutions jointly and that a commis
sion be appointed to make selection from
time to time, and report the same to the
executive couucll for confirmation, un
der such provisions for hearing and ap
peal as may be deemed wise iu tne prem
Iowa Is not possessed of a surplus of
water surface, and all the ponus. and
lakes capable .thereof ought to be pre
served, and the commission should desig
nate these in it's report.
It has been the custom for some years
to release convicts, confined in our peni
tentiaries, upon parole, conditioned that
they scrupulously ubsent themselves from
saloons and places where intoxicating
liquors are kept or sold, and in all re
spects demean themselves as worthy citi
zens. If the party violates these condi
tions, he is rearrested aud returned to
the peuitcntiary to serve the balauce of
his term. In the last ten years 004 sus
pensions of sentence for felony have been
granted, and 209 for minor offenses. Of
these only fifty-three have been revoked.
Doubtless some more of the released con
victs have resumed vicious practices
without having been detected. A large
percentage, however, have been restored
to lives of usefulness, aud the dignity of
the law has in uo measure'Suffered vio
lence. I think the plan should be encour
aged by express statutory provisiou, aud
1 recommend, iu case the offender vio
lates the terms of his parole, that he be
made to forfeit the good time he may
have earued prior to his release.
There are a large number of inmates
of the peiUteutiary to-day who can be
safely paroled aud convictions are had
every month of young meu, who have
heretofore born* favorable reputations,
but who through idleness have drifted
into bad company and evil habits. The
arrest, the indictment, the trial, the
shame and the disgrnce incident to con
viction are frequently sufllcient to effect
a reformation, but under the present sys
tem a term in the penitentiary seems un
avoidable. A suspension of senteuco by
the Governor upon the recommendation
of tbe trial judge, under conditions above
indicated, should, I think, be authorized,
and actual iucarccration in many cases
thereby averted. The most dreaded or
deal of the repentant convict must of
necessity be the actual entrance withiu
the walls of the penitentiary. The sus
pension of this can but be a great incen
tive to reform.
In this conucction I recommend that
the Governor be authorized to release
at his discretion, and upon the recom
mendation of the board of control, any
inmate of either of the industrial schools,
and that ail persons confined in these in
stitutions, male or female, be discharged
upon attaining their majority.
On tbe 25th day of April, 1808, the Presi
dent of the United States made a requisition
on lowu for three regiments of Infantry and
two light batteries ot artillery, for service In
the hpanlsh war. This order wns subse
quentty modified to include fonr regiments
of lnfuuti-y, aud the call for artillery was
revoked. Afterwards a second requisition
was made to tucreuse the regiments from
834 to 1,330 enlisted men, and two llsht bat
teries of artillery were again luciuded. Un
der these several calls four organizations,
numbered cousecutlveiy the Forty-ninth,
Fiftieth, Fifty-tlrst and Fifty-seOond Regi
ments of Iowa Voluuteer infantry, consist
ing of 210 commissioned otilcers aud 3,120
enlisted iqeu, and two light batteries of ar
tillery, consisting of six commissioned otii
ccr* aud 220 enlisted men,, were mustereo
into the service of tlie United States. Tht
two batteries were subsequently discharged
before leavlug the State. The Forty-ninth
Itegimout was sent first to Jacksonville,
Fin., aud thereafter to Cuba, where it dlo
service during the winter of 18U8-'0D, and
was discharged at Savnnnnli, Oa., on tbt
13th day ot May. 1800. Tbe Fiftieth Regi
ment was first ordered to Jacksonville, Fla„
where it remained in camp for several
months, wheu it wus returned aud mustered
out at Catup McKlnley, Des Moines, on the
30th day of November, 1808. The Fifty
first Kegiment was ordered Into camp at
San Francisco, Cal., where It remained
some months. It was then conveyed to the
Philippine Islands, where it rendered active
service In suppressing Agulnaldo's Insurrec
tion, aud was returned to San Francisco,
Cal., and there discharged on tbe 2d day
of November, 1800. The Fifty-second Reg
iment was sent to Chickamauga, and there
remained In canm until the 28th day ot
August. 1808. when It was returned to
Camp McKlnley. Des Moines, aud dis
charged on the 30th day of October, 1S08.
The losses by death sustained by these
regiments werp as follows: The Forty
ninth Regiment lost 54 men. the Fiftieth
Regiment lost 32 men. the Flfty-flrst Regi
ment lost 41 meu. aud the Fifty-second Reg
iment lost 30 men total loss by death, 103.
Wonls of highest praise of the troops fur
ulshed by our State have been heard from
nutuy sources. Brigade nud corps com
manders have spoken of the regiments and
of their officers in most commendatory
terms, and the conduct of the men, both in
camp nud on the tiring Hue, was ever gen
tlemanly, soldier-like and heroic. Iowa's
military record, ot which she has been and
is so Justly proud, has not suffered by rea
son of anything that has occurred In con
nection with tne service of the men who
volunteered at the call of the United State*
in 1808.
In anticipation of the declaration of wai
against Spain, the Twenty-seventh (iencrnl
Assembly,, shortly before its adjournment,
appropriated five hundred thousand dollars
($500,000), to be paid on the requisition ot
the fiovernor "In the defense of the State
and in aid of the national government in
case of war." Of this sum, $140,484.01 was
used in equipping and furnishing the troops
hereinbefore referred to In caring for tne
sick in hospitals nt home and In distant
camps: aud In supplying comforts for the
men while In the service. A detailed state
ment of these expenditures will be found in
the report of the Adjutant Ueneral. Ot
the $140,484.01 expended by the State, $01,
483.78 has been refunded by the general
government. The balance Is now pending
as a claim before the department, but It
will require additional Congressional legis
lation to authorize the payment of soint
considerable number of the Items.
Nationnl Guard.
The experience of the last two years has
demonstrated the wisdom of some modifica
tion in our National Ouard taws. Undei
tbe call made In 1808. the four regiments of
tbe Iowa National Guard were transferred
to the United States service under theii
then existing orgnulzatious. This left two
brigadier generals nnd their staff officers
unprovided for. These offices should, 1
think, be abolished.
No better regiments were probably evei
mustered than the four coutributed by Iowa
to the Spanish war. 1 have always Insisted,
and still believe, tbat if they could have
been promptly sent to tbe front. In view ot
the training they hod previously received,
they would have made a record wortbv ot
like organizations In tbe regular army. Nov.
ertheless, they were without military repu
tation at tbe time the earlier brigades and
corps were being formed, and were there
fore left In camp white other regiments
with experienced officers were selected for
srvice/ I therefore recommend that the
office of Colonel be left vacnut. to be filled
by the selection of a colonel wbff is a grad
uate from tbe Government school at west
I'olut, or an experienced field officer ot a
previous war.
Camp duty is the most dangerous detail
that regiment cau have. As an Illustration
of this, the Flfty-flrst lown remniued in
San Francisco, supposedly the most health
ful and Invigorating climate In the world,
for five months and lost twenty-nine meu.
It then went to the front, spent the raluv
season in the tropics, forclug Jungles ana
wadiug swamps and bayous, fought in fif
teen battles, and in twelve months lost
twelve men. 1 prefer to see subsequent reg
iments from this State, should other wars
ensue, serve ou the firing Hue, under the
coinmaud of sons of Iowa who have-been
educated at West Point, or who have seen
octunl service as field officers, rather than
have them languish In camps.
Diseased Cattle.
Some years ago the Government effectu
ally eradicated pleuro-pneumonia atnoug
cattle. This was not accomplished, how
ever, without much appareut loss to tbe
owners of stock, but the result inured great
ly to their benefit. More recent Investiga
tion hus demonstrated the preseuce. to some
considerable extent, of tuberculosis'among
all grades aud conditions of cattle lu this as
well as in foreign countries. I bave the
promise that an extended series of experi
mentation along these nnd kindred lines will
be prosecuted at the College of Agriculture
and Mechanic Arts during the current bien
nial period. Until it shall be demonstrated
that the offspring of cows thus affected Is
likely also to be diseased, I am not ready to
advise tbe slaughter of hreediug stock, ai
least ot beef herds. 1 do, however, believe
It not ouly wise but very Important tbat the
sale of milk from cows affected with tuber
culosis be prohibited by statute, and ade
quate penalties provided for its violation.
Fit)h and Game Warden.
The report of the lish aud game warden
Is worthy ot your perusal, aud his recom
mendations should receive consideration.
Formerly the State expended considerable
money in the propogatlon of different spe
cie's ot game tish. This has been large)
superseded by a resort to uatural sources ot
supply. There is a large number of bayous
along tbe Mississippi River, which fill nt
certalu seasons of tbe year, aud as the
water recedes tlie outlets are closed and
the-bayous arc left swarming with game
fish, from a pound or uiore iu weight to the
smallest fry. The State Warden has, dur
ing the last few years, seined from these
bayous an estimate of 4,000,000 of these
fish, which have been transported in cm
constructed for the purpose, nud ptaccd In
various streams, lakes and ponds in differ
ent parts of the State. Tbe supply Is luex
hausrlble, nnd affords a much cheaper and
a moro effective method of stockiug the
waters of the State thau propagating in the
old way. Souie modification of our laws foi
the protection of both llsti and game ought
also to be made.
For the better pereservatlon of the quail
111 this State 1 recommend thut their de
struction by any method be prohibited at
all times when there Is snow on the ground.
I recomiueud that the game wlthlu this
State be protected uguiust non-resident
hunters by the imposition of penalties sim
ilar to those which confront our citizens
when they seek shooting grouuds beyond
State lines. I further recommend that
seining from that portion of the Mississippi
River under Iowa jurisdiction be prohibited
at all seasons.
Ou the Otb and 7th ot April, 1802. a tve
mendous battle wns fought ueur the Ten
nessee Uiver, at a log church that was
called the Shlloh meeting-house. At that
thue Iowa had fifteeu infantry regimeuts at
the front. Eleven of these participated in
this battle aud it is generally couceded that
the Iowa troops, by their heroic stand nt
what the rebels called "The Hornets'
Nest," saved the Federal arrnv from de
struction and overthrow. The Government
has purchased this battlefield for a uationui
military park and officially appointed rep
resentatives of the several Iowa organiza
tions that took part in the engagement have
located the position of their respective regi
ments. The Government bus ulso estab
lished a national military park and ceme
tery on the grounds where the important
battle of Cbnttauooga was fought, in which
teu Iowa regiments took au active part, and
where nearly 400 members of these organi
zations were either killed or wounded.
Other States have erected, or have lu proc
ess of construction appropriate monuments
both at Shiloh ami Chattanooga, commem
orative of the bravery and heroism of their
soldiery. Iown should speedily do tbe same.
Iu these heroic timeB the sentiment of the
State will, I think, indorse as liberal appro
priations as have been made by othei
Purchase of More Ground.
When the present Capitol was built it was
believed to be as commodious as the needs
oi the State would ever require. It has
uow been occupied sixteen years, nnd sev
eral ot the departmentes are seriously cou
gestod. An nrsenal Is needed for the ac
commodation of the Adjutant General's de
partment. Storage of Quartermaster sup
plies is uow provided lu building rented
ror the purpose, it was found necessnr?
to locate the Board of Control in committee
rooms back ot the Senate chamber, which
cannot well be spared from their ueslgued
use during tbe session of the General As
sembly. A warehouse, fyr the storage and
proper distribution and reshlpment of sup
plies for tbe various lustltutlons under tbe
management of tht Board of Control,
much needed, an3 should be provided at a&
early date. 1 recommend tbat tbe two blocks
directly north of the Capitol grounds be im
mediately purchased, or obtained under con
demnation proceedings. Nothing wiU be
saved by delay, and the erection of substan*
tial buildings by the owners upon this prop
erty may materially add to the expense.
Building and Loan Association*.
Insufficient protection for the people of
our State agalust reckless Investments bj
non-resident btiildiug and loan associations
Is now offered by our laws. Instances bave
repeatedly been brought to »uy attention
where the holders of stock In these foreign
associations have paid nil their contracts
require, nnd thereafter assessments have
been made of more than 25 per cent, of the
withdrawal value. I think it would be well
to safeguard our people by somewhat more
advanced legislation on the subject.
Kxpert Examination of Books.
The statutes of the State contemplate an
annual examination of the books of the vari
ous State offices nnd departments, but fail
to provide a fund from which the services
Incident to such examination can be paid.
At the beginning of tbe year 1800 com*
petent accountants were employed and the
books of several of the State offices care
fully examined. The expense of these ex
aminations amounted to $550, which bus not
been paid for reasons above stated. As a
matter of business protection, similar ex
aminations ought to ue made annually, nnd
should be provided for by necessary appro
priations. I recommend an appropriation
sufficient to pay tbe expense already Incur
red, and that authority be given the Execu*
tive Council to discharge similar bills In tbe
Interest on Endowment Fnnd.
By the terms of the Federal grant ot
lauds in aid of a college of agriculture and
mechanic arts, the proceeds of these lands
were uinde a perpetual fund, and tbe State
is required to make good any losses, and is
churged with an aunual Income thereon ot
not less than 5 per cent, per anuum. The
statutes of the State require that this mon
ey shail be loaned upon mortgages bearing
not less than 0 per cent. Interest. The uu
exampled prosperity of the eouutry, nnd the
Incident surplus of capital, have rendered it
Impossible to obtain the rate of interest
fixed by law, and there Is now in the State
treasury more thun $150,000 which the stat
utory restrictlou as to rates renders It Im
possible to invest, and on wbicb the State
Is paying 5 per cent, uuder the provisions
of the l'ederal statute. 1 recommend that
permission be gruuted to Invest this fund
at current rates of interest.
Official Bond*.
The question of official bouds impresses
me as worthy of your consideration. The
operation of guarantee companies within
this State is authorized by law, and persons
charged with the responsibility thereof arc
empowered to accept the obligation of these
associations and companies. The facilities
for obtaining surety, without asking individ
ual frieuds, being thus within the reach ot
those elected to official posttlou, renders It
more embarrassing to pursue the course
previously necessary. I recommend that
sureties upon official bouds be procured at
the expense of the State, county or munici
pality served. A maximum rate should be
fixed, and this inuximum which the public
should be called upon to pay should be the
minimum nt which any reputable company
will furnish a bond of like amouut under
the most favorable circumstances.
Governor's Salary.
The salary fixed by law for the Chief Ex
ecutive of the State is now $3,000. In addi
tion. it has beeu customary for tbe General
Assembly to specially appropriate $500 per
annum for work on the Executive Council,
aud $50 per month for room rent. This la
manifestly below the necessary expenses
of a family in the city of Des Moines main
tained ainld surroundings becoming the
office. Most of tho States of the United
States have executive residences, furnished
and maintained largely nt State expense,
if this shall not be the policy of Iown. suf
ficient should be provided, I think, to pay
the rent of a suitable residence.
I recommend that the salary of the Chief
Executive of Iowa be increased, and that
such provision for a suitable residence be
made as may seem to comport with the dig
nity of the Stnte. This lucrense of salary,
however, should begin Jan. 1002. It would
be inappropriate to increase the salarv of
any officer duriug the term of office* for
which he has been elected.
Iu the confidence that the Twentv-elghth
General Assembly will sustain the reputa
tion eujoyed by its predecessors nnd as jus
tified by the legislative history of Iowa, the
foregoing observations are respectfully sub
Poked His Eye with Scissors.
It was after the paper was out, and a
crowd of newspaper men, of whom
The Saunterer was oue, was sitting In
au all-night rcsturant. The door open
ed and a young fellow with a-bandnge
over one eye entered and came up to
the table.
"Where'd you get it, Billy asked
"Accident. Girl poked a pair of scis
sors in tuy eye. Say, what are you
going to do with a girl like that, any
howV" he added, a look of comic de
spair spreading Itself over that portion
of his face left uncovered. He took a
letter out of his pocket and threw it on
the table. "I just got it."
The Saunterer picket it tip and read
It out loud.
am terribly worried, Billy," It ba
gau, "about your eye. It must pain
you so, and while, of course, I knew
that you doirt think for au Instant that
It was Intentioual, somehow I feel that
you are angry with me for my care
lessness. Now, don't be, Billy, for 1
would give auything in the world if It
liadu't happened.'Last night I got the
crazy Idea that you' might lose your
sight, and I couldn't sleep for thinking
of it."
There followed a beautifully-worded,
eloquent expression of heart-felt aux
lety that seemed io bespeak the deep
est sincerity. And then came the in
evitable postscript, the cause-of Billy's
S.—Do you know, dear, there are
some awfully good shows iu town.
Don't you think it would be fun to gee
a show with only one eye? The nov
elty! I could be ready nt half-past 7
Saturday evening."—Philadelphia In
Prevention of Gun Accidents.
Guuning accidents bave become so
frequent that it might lie well to for
mulate a few rules for the guidance of
those who go forth to slay. How would
these do?
1. When you hand a loaded gun to
your companion always keep the muz
zle pointing your way. This may save
the fool killer a job.
ii. Never go liuntiug with a man who
looks like a deer. Don't look like a deer
yourself. A man In I'euusylvania was
shot by a particular friend because the
tuft of liair on his head resembled a
partridge. When you go hunting have
your head shaved.
3. Don't use a guu that will carry
three or four miles. You may drop au
luuocent cow In the next couuty. Better
stick to granddad's yhotguu with tbe
warped barrel. The children in a Wis
consin country school got a holiday on
account of one of these loug distance
guns. Bullet crosned over two town
ships and hit the schoolma'ain in the
4. If you have any doubt that the deer
you are going to shoot at may be your
hunting coiupaulon dou't yell, "Is that
you, Pete?" before you Are. It might
alarm the deer—If it Is a deer.
5. If you really waut to insure perfect
safety against hunting accidents have
your eyes, your nerve and your tt re
arms thoroughly tested before you start
out—and then stay at home.— Cleveland
riain Denier.
Two Moving Girls.
Maude—Mr. De .Tones asked me to
sing for him tbe other evening after
we had been introduced.
Clara—Aud what did you slug?
Maude—Why, how do you know that
I sang at all?
Clara—Well, I noticed that he didn't
ask you to sing to-night.
Dillingham—Mrs. outre's affairs re
mind me of this South African war.
Cuttinghurst—How's that?
Dillingham—Triumph of the bores.—
Philadelphia North American.
Our grand business iu life Is not to
see whut lies dimly at a distance, but
to do what lies clearly at hand.—Car
It Is to live twice when you can en
joy the recollcctiou of your former life.
Both Honiei of the Iowa Legislature
Meet and Effect Formal Organiza
tions—Senator lohn H. Gear Unani
mously Renominated by Republicans*
The twenty-eighth General Assembly
conveued Monday morniug at 10 o'clock
at the capitol building in Des Moines.
Lieut. Gov. Millitnau called the Senate
to order. A committee on inauguration
was appointed nud miuor committees
'were provided for after the organization
had been effected by the election of
George A. Newman, of Cedar Falls for
secretary, aud the other officers nomin
ated at the oaucus, as follows: Presi
dent pro tem, Senator W. F. Harriman,
of Hampton Sergeant-at-arms, Capt. E.
C. Collins, Garner Postmistress, Viola
Cook, Carroll Chief doorkeeper, Cftpt.
J. H. Serene, Lansing.
Representative Charles Stewart, of
Polk County, called the House to order.
M. L. Temple was elected temporary
speaker. 1. H. Bowen was unanimous
ly elected permanent speaker and the
other caucus nominees were elected thus:
Chief clerk, S. M. Cart, Indianoln en
grossing clerk, Mrs. Mollie G. Heist,
Wayne Couuty: enrolling clerk. Miss
Clara Keller, Louisa Couuty sergeant
at-arms, P. G. Greer, Page County
chief doorkeeper, Thadius B. Muxson,
Cedar County. An inauguration com
mittee was selected.
Special committees were named in the
House' to consider the three contests
before the House. George Battey, Dem
ocrat. contests the seat of H. W. Byers,
of Shelby, alleged miscount Nathan
Lindsay. Populist, contests the seat of
,7. W. Scott, of Ida I Monona district),
cluimiug that his own couuty, Monona,
is entitled under tlie constitution to a
representative of its own: 1*\ S. Gibson,
Uepublirau. contests the election of .1. C.
Cottrell, of Plymouth County, alleging
miscount. The inaugural committees
met in tbe evening and decided to hold
tbe inaugural ceremonies Thursday.
At a joint caucus held Monda.y night
John 11. Gear wus unanimously renom
inated by tjie Republicans of the Assem
bly for United States Senator by accla
mation, A. B. Cummins withdrawing his
name. Senator Gear spoke briefly. The
election will be held Tuesday, Jan. 10.
The caucus also nominated Howard Ted
ford, of Mount Ayr, for State binder and
Bernard Murphy, of Vinton, for State
Senator Gear in accepting the nomina
tion of the caucus for re-election said:
"The itepublicau party and the people
of Iowa have honored me beyond com
pare. There are many grave problems
now before Congress, and I leave to
morrow for Washington to perform my
duties there. The position of United
States Senator is most importnut. He
counsels with the President of the Uui
ted States and he is responsible for the
nation's representatives abroad. The
present Congress proposes to make every
dollar ot paper money us good as gold
and to settle the questions at stake in the
Philippiues. There is much to be done
by tbe preseut Congress, aud I shall en
deavor to perform my duties faithfully.
Tuesday's session was devoted to rout
ine business. Gov. Shaw's message was
presented to the Legislature. Arrange
ments for the inauguration of Gov. Shaw
were completed. The ofllciAl canvass of
the State vote was made in joint conven
tion. It showed the following vote on
Governor: Leslie H. Shaw (Rep.), 2235#,
484 Fred E. White (Dem.), 184,003 At
wood (Pro.'i, 7,031 Lloyd (Pop.), 1,007
Kraemer (Soc. Lab.), 757 Peacock (Unit
ed Christian 484.
The Democrats of the Legislature Wed
nesday evening in jolut caucus nominat
ed for United States Seuator Fred E.
White of Webster City, who has twice
been Democratic candidate for Governor.
The name ot Cato Sells of Viuton was
proposed and a discussion followed, indi
cating that the result would be close. A
ballot was decided on and was about to
be taken, when Representative Theophi
Itis of Davenport read a telegram from
Mr. Sells, asking thut Mr. White be made
the nominee without opposition. Mr.
Sells' name was then withdrawn nnd Mr.
White named by ncclamation.
Needed the Introduction.
A young inau with a beetling brow
and a ulce uew overcoat eutered a law
office in one of the big downtown office
buildings and Inquired for a member of
the firm—a Mr. Youuger—whose name
he pronounccd with strict regard for
the rules of orthoepy.
"Is Mr. Young-er In?" he asked of
the youug wotunu stcnog.apher, with,
whom he seemed to be acquainted.
"You mean Mr. Youn-ger'r" she re
piled, pronouncing tlie "g" hard.
"Cau It be he pronounces It that
way?" asked tbe caller, felgniug sur
prise. "Of course. It's his privilege to
pronouuee It as he chooses there's uo
set rule for pronouncing proper names.
But you know Y-o-u-n-g-er doesn't spell
Youn-ger, but Young-er."
"No, I didn't know it." she answered
as one who doesn't care. "But here he
comes uow. That's^ilm going into bis
private office."
"Excuse me, but that's not hitn."
"No? Pray, who is it, then?" :i
"It's he."
They stared at each other for ten
seconds nud thou tbe young man said:
"Will you introduce me to Mr. Young
"No!" she retorted. "Since you seem
to know so much more about him than
1 do, I think you'd better introduce me."
'rhere was an ominous click in the
rattle of the typewriter as the young
man entered the private office, and pre
sented his card. ,"
He Was It."
He—I wouder If you really love me.
She—I g-guess so. I dream of you
nearly every night.
He—What tlo you dream, dearest?
She—That I see you in a Jewelry store
looking at diamond riugs.
Might Be Petit.
Mrs. Stubb—John, wouldn't a jury of
womeu be grand?
Mr. Stubb—Well, Maria, if It wasn't
a grand jury in the first place all women
iu creation couldu't make it so."
Why He Wept.
"Death Is a sad thing," said the
stranger to the man who stood weeping
beside a grave.
"It is indeed," sobbed tbe other.
"Are you sorrowing over the loss of a
very dear friend?" asked a stranger.
"I am sorrowing over the grave of a
man I uever knew," replied the mourn
r. "He was my wife's first husband."
Too Much Profit in It.
"Why do you think postage stamp
sellers ought to pay a license?"
"Because they aro iu the Dcker busi
ness."—Philadelphia Bulletin.
A Possible Explanation.
Harold—I think Algy's engagement
with Miss Van Swelle must be broken
off. I never see them together any
Percy—Perhaps they are married.^*
New York Journal.
Getting In line.
Hattle—Is Mr. De Jones as attentive
to you as ever?
Ella—Yes but he's a perfect riddle.
Hattle—Well, If you give him up give
me a chance to guess.—Chicago New*.
y\ saw you kissing my daughter. I
don't like It, slh" "Then you don't
know what's good, sir."—Life.
"What's the difference between foot
ball and war?" "Foot-ball Is war with
out any human oUJect in view.—Ex.
Teacher (angrily)—Why don't yon an
swer my question, Bobby? His broth
er Tomrnj (answering for him)—
Please, sir, he's got peppermint In
his speech.—Tit-Bits.
Miss Thirty-smith (severely)—A man
should never call ou a girl after drink
ing. Jack Swift (cheerfully)—That'B a
fact. Many a man has become engaged
In just that way.—Puck.
Fuddy—You call mouey "stamps.":
dou't you? Duddy—And money Is cur
rency. So 1 suppose when you speak
of an elastic currency you refer to rub
ber stamps.—Boston Transcript
Didn't move him: "Well, did the boss
give you a raise?" "No." "Not even
when you told hm you had grown gray
In his service?" "No. Gave me the
name of a good hair-dye."—Puck.
Mr. Snell—What are you crying for,
Elsie? His little daughter—I've Just
read tbat the diamond mines may be
exhausted in seven years, and It's eight
before my coming out!—Jewelers*
"From what I hear, Mr. Earnestly,
that son of yours at college Is a little
fast." "A little fast!" repeated the old
man disdainfully. "He holds the ama
teur record as a 100-yard sprinter."—
Detroit Free Press.
Wallace—There Is nothlug like matri
mony to make a man appreciate tbe
value of money. Ferry—That's so. A
dollar a man gives to his wife does
look bigger to him thau any other dol
lar.—Cincinnati Enquirer.
Uncle Hiram—What kind er thing is
that that woman's got ou her neck,
Mandy? His niece—That's a chinchil
la collar, uucle. Uncle Hiram—Chin
chiller, hey? I want to know! Blessed
If I didn't think 'twas a chin-warmer.
"How still they are," remarked Mrs.
Fogg, apropos of tbe young couple in
the next room. "Yes," replied Mr.
Fogg, "It remiuds me of my army days.
It was always wonderfully quiet just
previous to an engagement."—Boston
Diplomacy: Mrs. Neighbors—l ad
vertised for a plain cook last week, but
dldu't receive a single reply. Mrs.
Nextdoor—Take uiy advice aud adver
tise for a good-looking kitchen lady,
and you'll be overrun with apilca
tlons.—Chicago News.
"So our friend is going to leave poll
tics?" "He is," answered Seuator Sor
ghum, "If he knows what's good for
him." "It is too bad to lose him he
was such an accomplished wire-pull
er." "Yes but he got hold of a live
wire.—Washington Star.
Ob, Tom!" exclaimed the bride of
six months, "what do you think?
Mother says she wants her body cre
mated." "She does, eh?" said the hus
band "well, tell her to get ready, and
I'll take her over to the crematory the
first thing In the morning."—Ex.
Young lady (to married sister)—Do
tell me an appropriate present to give
a new baby. Married sister—I know
just the thing—these little jeweled
safety-pins. Baby, darling, had one
given him six months ago and I have
worn It ever since.—Harlem Life.
"What did Noah live on when tbe
fiood bad subsided and his provisions
in the ark were exhausted?" asked a
Washington Sunday school teacl
her class. "I know," squeaked a little
girl, after the others had given up.
"Well, what?" inquired tbe teacher.
"Dry land."
Its Beauty Departed: \Vlfe (rushing
toward shop window)—Oh, look berel
Husband—Well, I declare! There Is
3ne of the tete-a-tete lamps you were
admiring at Mrs. De Style's. Wife
(suddenly stopping) Horros! It's
marked "Only two dollars.' "—New
York Weekly.
Grlgsou—Excuse me. .Mltwin, but
why Is It that people of your name are
enerally such confounded bores? Mlt
win—I don't know. How many persons
of my uame did you ever know? Grig
son—By George! come to think of it,
you are the only oue I ever knew.—Boa
ton Transcript.
"You see, It was this way: They were
alt three so dead in love with her and
ail so eligible that to settle the matter
she agreed to marry the one who should
guess the nearest to her age." "And
did she?' "I don't know. 1 know that
she married the one that guessed the
lowest."—Pearson's Weekly.
"Speaking of Cuban uprisings and in
surrections," said Wallace, "I shall nev
er forget one that occurred twenty
years ago." "Were you present?" aBked
Ferry. "Very much so. It happened
about five minutes after I bad lighted
one of my father's big black Havana
cigars."—Cincinnati Enquirer.
Askiug too much American girl—
Aud If I marry you will I live in an old
English' castle, with turrets nnd bat
tlements, famed in song and story?
Eugllsh Lord—Yes, you shall. Ameri
can girl—Aud will you introduce me to
the Prince of Wales' set? English
Lord—Um—er—not nutil 1 begiu to
get tired of you.—New York Weekly.
A burst of generosity "I hear," said
the crusty old gentleman, "that there
are some violins so valuable that uo
body^ thinks of playing on them."
Yes. "I saw one In a museum," replied
his wife. "1 wonder if I couldn't buy
oue and trade it to the young man next
door for t^e fiddle that he has been
using for the last six months."—Wash
ington Star.
Blotters of Historic Value.
A Philadelphia man owus a most
unique assortment of pieces of blotting
paper, collected by his father, who was
long au official of the White House,
each of which bears, reversed, the sig
nature of a President, from General
Harrison, who died a month after his
election In 1841, to Garfield. Ou one
sheet, the most highly prized of the
lot, the last official letter signed by
President Llncolu was blotted before
he was assassinated by Booth.
How Diamonds Ara Cut.
Dlamouds are cut lu three different
forms-the fose, the brllliaut and tbe
table, of which the second Is the pretti
est. It Is a double pyramid or cone,
of which tbe top Is cut off to form a
large plane, and at the bottom directly
opposite to a small plane.
ierusaleiii's Population Increasing.
Tbe population of Jerusalem has
been rapidly increasing of late and Is
now about 45,000 of these 28,000 are
He (In an argumeut)—Well, thank
goodness, I'm not two-faced. S?
You ought to be thankful. 0**
like yours enough.—Ex.

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