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THE STAR OP; THE NORTH.
W. H. JACOBT, Proprietor.] VOLUME <ll. B'ff ais ©IF emffl sr@iEß3i 8 PUBLISHED EVBBY WEDNESDAY BY WM. H. JAGOBY, Office on Main St,, 3rd Square below Market, TERMS: —Two Dollars per annum if paid ■witlun six months from the time of subscrib ing: two dollars and filly cts. if not paid with iu the year. No subscription taken for a less period than six months; no discontinuance permitted until all arrearages are paid, un less at the option of the editor. The terms of advertising wilt be as follows: One square, twelve lines, three times, $1 00 Every subsequent insertion, 25 One square, three months, 3 00 One year, 8 00 Cljoue fJoetrg. From Life Illustrated. MORNING. Morn again, with golden pencil, Tints the curtain of the east; And again, in robes of tinsel, Slandeth at her holy chancel, Making ready for the feast! Gently flushing, Gently blushing, Like a bride before the priest! Oh ! what holy thoughts come o'er us, As we drink the morning's balm 1 As we view the fields before us— As we join the pleasant chorus Of the morning's holy psalm ! As we wamier, As we ponder, (; In the morning's blessed calm. Thoughts of other happy hours Come to us with memories rife; And again we seek the bowers Where we used to gather flowers In the morning march of life ! Memories greet us, Pleasures meet us, Vet unstained by care or strife. Oh ! how much of life is wasted In this so-called world of bliss ; How much pleasure-gain is blasted— How much happiness untasted— How much pleasure do we miss, I Jut by keeping Dull eyes sleeping Such a holy morn as this f Happy ! happy ! blessed morning ! May my soul retain the view ; Ere the evening-lamps are burning, May the holy-picture warning, Teach me to begin anew ! Guide me cheerful, Make me prayerful, Till life's pilgrim-day is through 1 A STRING SONG. BV B. r. TAYLOR. The miracle of Spring is begining.— Leaf less indeed, stand the great woods, and shivering in the cool wind. The joints of rheumatic oaks creak dismally and there is a moan in the maples; the skeleton or chards are brown and gray upon the south ern slopes, but the snn is shining, and the clock of time ticks in the heart of April. A January fire rolls and roars up the chimney's capacious throat in the evenings, but.the birds are abroad, and their songs are in all the air. Hardly a whisp of hay remains in the broad deep bay of the barn, and the cows decline to give down, and the lambs are going where the good lambs go, though the lilacs are budding and the willows have fringed the streams with green. How full of the dear old music of sum mer, are wood,and orchard, and field. Even the great empty barn, with its ribs of oak, is a twitter with Swallows, which dart in and out of the diamond doors in the gable, and the mud plastered cottages that are built along the rafters. The Robins are singing the self same songs they sung a thousand jears ago, and the Lincties are untarnished and golden as ever. Down by the marsh, the. Bobolinks are ringing their little bells, and swinging to and fro upon the little bushes that sway in the wind. The brown Thrushes aro building their nests in ihe fence corner, and the heaps of brush; a Baltimore Oriole flickered like a flake of fire through the garden, this mor ning and drifted away behind the barn ; we frightened up a poor Whip-poor will yesterday, from among the the withered leaves, and we found a blue-bird's nest be gun, in a hollow stump in the pasture A little gray couple are busy building in a cleft of the bar-post, and a small Trogan in Speckled jacket is about to begin house keeping in llie loaded end of the well eweep, that goes up forty times a day, and cotnes down with a bang. Why didn't the little idiot take up his quarters in the bucket. The other day, John hung his jacket upon the fence, and this morning he shook out a nest from one of the pockets. There is singing every-where ; from tho tuft of gray grass, there comes a small tune of two notes and a rest, and then two more; from the second rail of the fence, a gush of melody ; from the roof-ridge, a soto ; from the depths of tho air, as of angel calling un to angel. The birds and the buds make it yApril, aud April it shall be. MISTAKE.— The town ol Horicos, is in a state of excitement—a I9MB case having almost taken place appears that one of the citizens— a of high social position—had made to meet her in her own room in the morning. To avoid mounted an out-house, climbing upofljttjgiof of a back building, raised the tn and beheld the ladies husband iiwji— be being sick had not gone out. was not pleasant to either especially as the 10 o'clock no good reason for entering a by the window, and his position forbid the idea that his object wasf^^HL^ 4 BLOOMSBURG; COLUMBIA COIJNTYTPA., WEDNESDAY, APRIL 20, 1859. A TOUGHING STOGY. THE WIDOW'S SON. Few were the youths throughout the king dom of Prussia that were allowed to stay at home in the eventful year of 1813. A war, more terriabfe, more vindictive than any one that had ever visited the continent of Europe, was raging through the land, and the country could spare none of its defend ers. Also the king had called his people to arms by means of that famous proclamation, which will be considered for evermore as one of the noblests documents in German history. They were true to the call—old and young; they left their homes, rushed to the colors, took up arms, and never laid them down tdl they had driven the enemy under the walls of Paris. The inhabitants of Silesia, well-known for their loyalty and patriotism, had not stood behind,amidst the general enthusiasm. There was not a family in the province that had not contributed its contingent to the na tional affair, and many a heart was throb bing painfully, whenever a new intelligence was spread of another of those dreadful bat tles, which, by riding the country from an odious enemy, threw sorrow and affliction upon many a quiet and peaceful home. On a sultry summer evening, in the year before mentioned, an old woman was sit ting before her humble cottage in the little Sdesiam village of Burnheim. She had put the distaff aside, and was reading the Bible, which lay opened on her knees. Whilst she was reading the holy words in an under tone to herself, her ears caught the sound of quick footsteps, and a long shadow emerg ed from behind the cottage. Tho old wo man trembled violently ; the moment after wards her uplifted eyes fall upon the figure of a handsome and well-made lad in milita ry attire. "How are yott, mother?" She arose, and threw her trembling arms around his neck. "God be thanked, my boy ( that I see thee again ! But how pale and haggard thou lookest/' She went on; after a pause ! "To be sure, thou must be very tired, and hungry too !" She led him in the room to the old arm chair, and urged him to sit down and repose himself a little, whilst she herself would prepare him some supper. "What did he like best? Should she make him an omelet, or roast a chicken ? Oh, it was no trouble at all ? Dear me, how could he talk of trouble ? she was but too glad to do anything for her own dear boy. Yes, she would go and get him a chicken." The old woman, all bustle and activity, left the room. The youth did not betray so much pleas ure at this hearty reception from his aged parent, as might have been expected. He was restless, and ill at ease: it seemed as if something was heavily weighing upon his heart; and when his wandeiirig eye fell upon the portrait of his deceased father, which was hanging right over the chimney piece, presenting that worthy gentlemen in the staff uniform worn by the king's garde de corps half a century ago, he felt as if the old sergeant waR looking at him with a grim frown upon his honest countenance; just as if he experienced ahearty inclination to stepout of his worm eaten, rosewood frame, to seize the old knotted hazelstick in the corner, with the brass knob at top, and to apply it to the back of his offspring for half an hour or so ; as, in fact, he had been in the habit of doing, many a day in his lifetime, some eight or ten years ago. His restless son felt so much overcome by this latter reflection that, when the old woman came bustling in again, after the lapse of some minutes, with the chicken under her apron, she found her own dear boy with his head in his hands, leaning listlessly upon the table. He sat up when she came in, but did not look at her. The old woman became atten tive. In the joy of her heart, she had never thought yet of asking him any questions except those concerning his appetite. Now, it began to strike her that the present period was rather a strange time for a soldier to be on leave of absence. "Churles !"—No answer. Tito old woman trembled violently. She dropped her burden, and walked straight up to him. Her honest wrinkled counten ance was full of anxiety and apprehension. Looking him full in the face, and clapping her hands together, she cried out in agony : "So help me God, Charles you are a deser ter !" "I couldn't stand it any longer, mothor," uttered her wretched son, in a broken voice, byway of apology. "You couldn't stand it !" said the old woman, exasperated beyond measure; "you couldn't stand it! and hundreds of thousands of your brethren do ! Fy, for shame and with her old, honest, trembling hand, she gave him a smack on the face. "Mother!" exclaimed the young man starting up, with the blood rushing to his iace. "Fy, for shame !" she went on, without heeding him in the least, "to bring such disgrace upon the whole village ! What would he say !"—she pointed to where the old warrior was hanging over the chimney piece, whose stern countenance, illuminated by the rays of the evening sun, seemed in deed to assume an unusual expression of solemn indignation. "Sit down, I say! you —deserter! It shall not be said that your dead father's house, in the village of Buru heim, is a place of refuge for runaways, whilst the whole country was up in arms ! Dou't you stir sir ! I'll be back in a min ute and with this, the brave old woman left the room, looking the door after her. She was not alone when she came . back about half an hour afterwards ; the coun try parson, the schoolmaster, the country judge, and a half a dozen more of the dig nitaries of the village, were with her. The little room was quite full wheu all these dis tinguished visitors had entered it. Charles sat in the old-arm chair, quite motionless, his face covered with both his hands. The honest villagers had made up their minds at once what to do with the deserter; they looked upon his crime as an ignominy, by which he had not only disgraced himself, but also their community at large, and they were not the men to put up with such an af front. The schoolmaster, who was a poli tician, and subscribed to a newspaper, hav ing informed them that the head-quarters of the commander-in-chief oi tlm army were but about two days' march from the village, they had resolved at once to escort him thither. The Judge proclaimed the young man a prisoner in the name of his majesty the king, and called upon him to follow him to a place of security for the night, as on the following morning they would in a body con vey him to his Excellency the field-marshal. General Bluchor. He rose, and followed them without opposition. When they were all gone, the old woman took up the Holy Scriptures once more ; but it was in vain that she strove to read ; her eyes grew dim and the letters were all swimming confus edly before them, so she put it down -and wept bitterly. Early on the following morning, a strange procession was seen emerging from the lit tle village of Burnheim—four old peasants escorting one young soldier. The country judge, with grave air marched a head of them, whilst the schoolmaster, who had obstinate ly insisted upon accompanying tho expedi tion brought up the rear. The prisoner, with downcast eyes and fallen countenance, was walking between the two other patriots; and as he had pledged his word not to make any attempt at flight, they had consented to leave his hands untied. When the expedi tion, after a day's march, put up for the night in a small hamlet, they were told that all the villages around were crammed with Frenchmen, so they were obliged to take a long roundabout way ; and it was not be fore the morning of the fifth day after their departure, that they reached head quarters. "Where is the residence of the comman der-in-chief?" asked they of one of tho or dinance officerSjAvhowere galloping through the streets in every direction. "Why, in tl.o chateau, to bo sure, whore the two huzzars were mounting guard, on horseback " When they had entered the yard, they were not in the least discouraged at the sight of whole scores of adjutants, and or derly-officers of every rank and arm, all of whom seemed to have some urgent business with the commander-in-chief for no sooner had any of them been dispatched, than he was seen mounting again and tearing away with his horse's belly to the ground. It never entered their heads tor one moment that the general might consider their own business to be of somewhat smaller importance, al though the schoolmaster argued fromwhathe saw that something of consequence wasgoing 011 just now. The worthy man was right so far ; the commander-in-chief was about to give battle on the following day. When they had been waiting patiently for a couple of lio'irs, and began to feel somewhat hun gry, the country judge, conscious of the im portance of Ins mission, ventured at last to accost ore of the officers of the general's stafT, who was passing by with a packet of sealed letters in his hand ; but that haMy functionary did not even stop to give ear to the address of the head man of the rural deputation, but merely grumbled something about the propriety of their going to Jetico— or further. Our worthy inhabitants of Burnheim,how ever, were not the men to give way so soon, and renewed the charge accordingly.. This time it was a middle-aged man, with a be nevolont countenance, whom they made ac quainted with their request, to see the field marshal on most urgent business. "Why, they had chosen their time rather badly, indeed ; the general was extremely busy. Couldn't one ol the secretaries do as well 1" "By no means they must see the general himself." "Was it an information concerning the enemy which they wanted to deliver ?" "O no ; something much more important —fropi fiurnheim," added the school master. The middle-aged officer with the benevo lent countenance, laughed, and said he would try. After the lapse of about half an hour, he camo back, and beckoned them to follow. They were ushered into an ante room, and directed to wait lor his Excellon cy. The door opened after another half houi's waiting, and an old man, with gray hairs, iron cut features, and bright eyes, entered the room; it was the commander, Old Fath er Blucher, as the soldiers called him.— The country judge stepped forward, and bowiog very low, delivered the speech a bout which he had been pondering ever since they had left their native place, and which, of course, he thought to be very el oquent. He stated ail that has been told al ready in the course of this narrative ; how the deserter's own mother had givou infor mation of her son's crime ; how they had resolved at once to bring him back to head quarters ; and concluded his address with a hope that his Excellency would not be in duced to think worse of their village, be cause of one that had rendered himself un worthy of the name of a Prussian. The Truth and Bight tiod tiouutry. I tears came trinkiing down ilia honest cheeks. The general looked very grave indeed.— I Those large bright eyes of his roamed for an instant over his rural audience with a strange expression. Ho knew at a glance what sort of men they were he had to deal with ; then his looks rested for a while on the beut figure of the young man, who with his downcast eyes and care worn face ap peared the very image of misery and dejec tion. He knew his case to be a hopeless one ; deserting colors in time of war is a capital crime, and Father Blucher, with his iron will, was the last man in the world to be trifled with. On a sudden, the features of the old hero assumed an expression of harshness. Turn ing round, towards the speaker of this sin gular deputation, he ipngh voice and in a very abrupt niamt^t"Mr. Judge, you are an ass." The villagers started as if they had been stung. After all the anxiety and trouble they had undergone for the cause which they considered to be a just one, they had expected a somewhat more cordial recep tion. "But your Excellency"—remonstrated the amazed dignitary. "Hold your tongue, 1 say, you are an ass. I know better; m Burnheim there arena run aways. And yon, my sou," he went on, with his iron features relenting a little, and with that same strange expression in his large bright eye, "you will show ihem to morrow, on the battle-field, what a Burnheim man can do ; you will not V' The young man dropped down on his knees, and was stammering a few broken words, which the (iaieuiL did not hear, however, for when the lad rose again with high flushed cheeks, and sparkling eyes—a far different man—Blucher had already left the room. The worthy peasants, whose perceptive I faculties were by no means equal to their I honesty, began at last to get a glimpse of I the General's real meaning. The country judge was the first to throw his cap high in to the air, and to give three hearty cheers for Father Blucher; who, with one single word, had extinguished what they consider ed a stain from their beloved village, com forted the broken heart of a mother, and preserved a pair of arms for the defence of the country—arms that could not fail to do their duty now. When they had given vent to their enthu siasm after their hearts' content, and taken leave of the young rjatfc who was carried away by an aid-de-carnp of the general's staff., they made up their minds to buy some provisions in the place, and to return again to the village. They had, however, scarce ly reached the yard, when they were over taken by the tame middle-aged officer who had announced them to the commander-in chief, and asked them what in Heaven's name they were going to do now. "Why, going back again, to be sure. To Burnheim, you know !" elucidated the schoolmaster. And did they think that his Excellency would allow anybody to leave head quar ters without having had a dinner first i He had already given orders to that effect, and they had but to (ollow the non-commission ed officer here, who would show them the way. They needed not to be told twice, we may be sure ; and were shown into a kitchen room, where dinner was serv ed up for them, with a bottle of wine stand ing before each cover, they felt very grateful to his Excellency, and very proud at the same time, because of the honor shown to the representatives of their viilage. But when each of them found a double Freder ick's d'or under his plate, their enthusiasm burst out alresh; and many were the healths drunk to the welfare of Old Father Blucher. When they had all eaten and drunk their fill, and were about to take their leave, they fell in once more with their friend, the mid dle-aged officer, who gave them some ad vice concerning the best way of reaching their village, without running any danger; for, as he said, the coming day would be an eventful one. He accompanied them through the yard to the gateway, where he bade them farewell, pointing, as he left, to one of tho huzza re, who was flttmnlcd guard, on horseback, before the gate. By heavens, it was the prisoner, the boy Charles, now fully pardoned by his Excel lency, the commander-in-chief How proud ha looked, with flushed cheeks and spark ling eyes ! He dared not address them, for he was on duly ; but he looked at them, as to say :—"Wait, and you shall see to-mor row !" Nor was he faithless to his vow. On the evening of the following day, the memora ble 26th ot August, when the bloody victory at Kalzbuck was gained, attd the field-mar shal rode through the thinned ranks of his men, who greeted him with enthusiastic cheers, he was addressed by the command ing officer of the 21st Huzzars; who report ed how greatly the private Charles Fisher had distinguished himself above all the rest, having taken a s.andard from the enemy, and made prisoner, \vit>*ji own hands, the commander of the French regiment. The field marshal stopped his horse, and taking the iron cross from his own uniform, and affixing it, with his own hands, to the breast of the young man, said, with a cheer ful voice, and the same strange expression in his large bright eyes : —''Well done, my son ! I knew I was right; in Burnhcim there ure no runaways." To some men it is indispensable lo be worth money, for without it they would be worth nothing. A STUMPER STUMPED. The subjoined anecdote of a candidate for the Legislature of a Western State is worth telling : There was a stump speaker, and Abner had been on tho platform enlightening the utiterrified, long and londly. " Fellow citi zens," said he, "I now come to a slanderous report which has been most dastardly cir culated against me, from one end of the country to tho other. My enemies not con tent with endeavoring to ruin my political prospects, hare, assassin like, attempted to blast my good name by ; their insidious re ports." Abner then stated what the rumor was, and continued : " 1 rejoice, my fel low-citizens, to have it,in my power instant ly to fasten the lie upon this malicious and utrooious slandyr. I see one of the most estimable citizens of the county, whose character for truth and integrity is above question. Squire Schooler, to whom I allude, is acquainted with all the facts, and I call on him here to say whether this rumor is true or false. I pause for a reply," Whereupon Squire Schooler slowly arose, and in his strong slow and senorous voice said, " I rather think you did it, Abner 1 " Vou old scoundrel exclaimed Abner, " why do you interrupt me while I am dis cussing great constitutional questions with your law personalities ?" And ho accom panied this objugatory exclamation with such a "surge" of gasticulation that he step ped back beyotu'. the platform, fell back ward on a big dog, amid the howls of which and the deafening roars of the "sovereigns,' the meeting was effectually broken up. STEALING A MARCH. —Xenophon and Chi risophus were the principal leaders of the famous Retreat of the Ten Thousand. Chi risophus was a Lacedemonian; and it is well known that, among his countrymen, stealing was not only allowed but encour aged, provided ii was done with so much ingenuity as not to be delected—otherwise the thief was severely punished, not for the theft, but merely for being found out. On a certain occasion during the retreat Xenophon advised to steal a march during the night, so as to gain possession of an eminence that commanded the enemy's camp. "But why," said he, addiessing himself to Chirisophus, "do 1 mention steal ing ? since I am informed that among yoii Lacedemonians, those of the first rank prac tice it from their childhood, and that instead ot being dishonest, it is your duty to steal those things which the law has forbidden : j and to the end, you may learn to steal with the greatest dexterity and secresy imagina | ble; your laws have provided that those I who are taken in a thelt shall be whipped, j This is the time therefore, lor you to show j how far your education has improved you, j and to lake care that stealing this march we j are not discovered, lest we smart severely for it." THE REAL QUANTITY or SLEEP NECESSARY. —"Healthy men,''' say the Rev. John Wes ley in one of his works, "require little above seven hours in twenty-four. If any one desires to know exactly what quantity ot sleep his own constitution requires, he may easily make the experiment which I made about sixty years ago. I then waked every night about twelve or one, and lay awake for some time. I readily concluded that this arose trom my being longer in bed than nature required. To be satisfied I procured an alarm, which waked rae the next morning at seven, near an hour earlier than I rose the day before, yet I lay awake again at night. On the second morning 1 rose at six, but notwithstanding this 1 lay awake the second night. The third morn ing I rose at fivq, but nevertheless 1 lay awake the third night. The lourlh morn ing I arose at four, as I have done ever since ; and I lay awake no more. And 1 do not now lie awake taking the year round, a quarter of an hour together in a month. By the same experiment, rising earlier and earlier every morning, may one find how much sleep he really wants." WHEN DEATH COMES. —Death comes at morn, when the sun is just rising in the east; at noon when its rays are most res plendent ; at eve when it gradually sinks beneath the horizon ; at midnight when it is entirely hidden from view. It comes to the babe just commencing to prattle , it comes to the man of middle age, when the connecting links binding as to life is strong; it comes lo the aged man with trembling limbs and faded eyesight, led along by oth ers ; it comes to the poor, struggling to ob tain a meagre sustenance ; it comes to the man in comfortable circumstances, by whom life is best employed; it comes to the weal thy, roiling inftluence and ease ; it comes to the idiot laughing at his own folly; it comes to the man with just sonso enough to pass through life easily ; it comes to the educated man glorying in his Cicero and Homer; it comes 10 the christian who looks upon it only as a happier land. Reader these words are spoken to you. Will you heed them f A " bearded" ball was recently given at Chicago, at which no gentleman was ad mitted without some hairy houorto his face. At the 6upper table, among the toasts and speeches denunciatory of shaving, was the following : " Man—Full-grown, bearded, Nature's great masterwork : too noble to be barefa ced; too perfect to be botched by the bung ling of barbarism." The entertainment closed with " the Bearded Quadrille,% a dance made for the occasion. i I'OWKR OF STKAM —A pint of water may be evaporated by two ounces of coal. In its evaporation it swells into two hundred and sixteen gallons of steem ; with a me chanical force sufficient to raise a weight of thirty-seven tons a foot high. The steam produced has a pressure equal to that of common atmospheric air; and by allowing it to expand, by virtue of its elasticity a fur ther mechanical force-may be obtained, at least equal in amount to the former. A pint of water, therefore, and 2 ounces of common coal, are thus rendered capable of doing as much work as is equivalent to seventy-lour tons raised a foot high. The circumstances under which the steam engine is work ed on railway aro not favorable to the economy of fuel, nevertheless, a pound of coal burned in a locomotive engine will •vnporaio five pints of water. t' it evap oration they will exert a mechanical force sufficient to draw two tons weight on the railway a distance of two minutes. The great pyramid of Egypt stands upon a base measuring 700 feet each way, and 500 feet high, its weight being twelve thousand sev en hundred and sixty millions of pounds.— It is stated that in constructing this prodig ious pile 100,000 men were constantly em ployed for twenty years. Now, however, | by the means of steam, the materials of this pyramid could be raised from the ground to their present position by the combustion of | about 480 tons of coal. DEVOTION HELPS INTELLF.CT.-AII knowledge j relates more or less directly to the character ! and works of God. All the sciences are de- j velopments of his attributes. Astronomy, j mathematics, natural and mental philoso | phy,&c , are but so many ways in which j the laws of God's great empire is made ; known to us. The child at school learning j the simplest combination of numbers, and ! the philosopher who soars to the sublimest | height of science, are alike conversant with j the works of God. The intellect of the ono ! may be to the other as half a dozen rays to j the full beams ol tho sun;, but yet, it is what God is, or what God has done, that occupies the attentiou of both. Now, as it is God's works that occupy the : intellectual powers, so it is most reasonable to suppose that those who oomo to the study of these works, or, in other words, engage in any intellectual pursuits, if they bring a right state of heart towards God, wdl enjoy peculiar advantages for success. The mind being in nappy harmony with Him will move with vigor and power. A cheering sense of his favor will animate it. Each intellectual attainment is anew discovery of a Being chosen already as tho heart's su preme good ; it is the perception of some new and lovely feature in the face ofa friend. "Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God." ROBBING A BRIDE OF HER BEG.— The St. Louis Dtwocviit is responsible for the fol lowing : At Layer's boarding house, in St. Louis, an unusually merry wedding came off t/n Tuesday night, and the dance was prolong ed till part one in the morning. The bride and groom then repaired 10 their apartment, but— horrible visu ! —the bed and bedding had been sacrilegiously stolen from (he nuptial bedstead 1 Some vindictive wretch had gained felonious ingress at the rear, and effected a robbery unparalleled in the history of matrimony. It is conjectured that so fell vengeance could only have been devised and executed by 6ome disap pointed lover ot the bride. "Lives there a man with soul so dead, Who never to himself hath said, The scamp who stole that bridal bed Deserves to live and die unwed, With maidens old to punch his head 1" About four months since a merchant of Bucyrus, Ohio, left for the Eestern States for the purpose of purchasing a new stock of goods, but becoming disposed he return ed home a week sooner than was anticipa ted by his wife. At a station near Bucyrus, to his astonishment he found his wife in company with a gentleman whom ho had always esteemed his best friend, making preparations for an elopement. Remem bering an anonymous letter he had receiv ed more'than a year ago, cautioning him to beware of his friend, his mind was in stantly made up ; he walked cooly up to his hatred rival, and at one stroke severed his right ear from his head, put it in his pocket and confronted his wife, asking her ii she would go home with him, at the same time telling her that he freely forgave her on account of her youth and their child. She gladly confessed her error, and the next train brought them to their home, where they now live happily, The ear is still retained in spirits by the husband. ' WOULDN'T BITE SUCH BAIT. —Our friend Jones has been doing homage to a pair of bright eyes, and talking lender things by moonlight, lately. A few evenings since he resolved to "make his destiny secure." Accordingly he fell on his knees before the fair dulcinea, and made his passion known. Much to his surprise she refused him out flat. Jumping to his feet he informed her that there were as good fish in the sea as ever were caught. Judge of the exaspera tion of our worthy swain, when she coolly replied: "Yes, but they don't bite at toads!" GOOB TEMPER is the philosophy of the heart, a gem of the treasury within, whose rays are reflected on all outward objects j a per petual sunshine, imparting warmth, lignt and life to all within the sphere of its influ ence. [Two Dollars per Annim. NUMBER ~TS? Charter of the ColumLln County Agrirnltnr -111, llortieulturnland Mccliunicul Associa tion. The following is a copy of an Act of In corporation just passed by the legislature ot Pennsylvania. It has received the signa ture of the Governor: AN ACT to incorporate the Columbia County Agricultural, Horticultural, and Me chanical Association. SECTION 1. He it enacted t<y the Senate and House vf Representative* of the Commonwealth of Ptmuylvania in General Assembly met and it is heieby enacted try the authority of the same. That I'alemon John, John Itamsey, t,. 13. Rupert, Caleb Barton, jr., Joseph W. Hen dershot. Win. Sloan, Levi L. Tate, J. H. Ikeler, Baltis Appleman, Elias Dieterick, Sylvester Pursel, J. G. Pursel, C. Bittcnben der, Andrew Freas, G. H. Fowler, Jn->a- Hayman, Reuben Wilson, B. P. Forlner, Samuel Creasy, John Robinson, H. Bieen bender, E. Mendenhall, John KielTer, Geo. Shuman, James Masters, and all others who paid fitly cents, are hereby declared to be a body politic and corporate by the name and style of the Columbia County Agricultural, Horticultural, and Mechanical Association to have succession, to plead and te implead ed, sue and be sued in all courts of record and elsewhere, and be capable to take aud enjoy lands, tenements and hereditaments, goods and chattels and the 6ame from time to time, to sell, grant, demise, alien and dispose of, and to have power to borrow money, to use a common seal and to alter or renew the same at pleasure, and to be en titled to tho privileges and benefits that oth er bounty agricultural and horticultural so cieties are, under the general act incorpor ating the Pennsylvania State Agricultural Society and authorizing Agricultural and Horticultural Societies to be established in each county in Pennsylvania, passed the twenty-ninth day of March, one thousand eight hundred and fifty-one, Provided, That the clear yearly value of the real estate by them hsld shall not exceed the sum of five thousand dollars. SECTION 2. That the officers of the said corporation shall be elected annually here after on such day and consist of such num ber and kind as the by-laws of said corpor ation may direct. SECTION 3. That said corporation when convened upon due notice given to the mem bers by public advertisement or otherwise shall have power and authority to make, or- I dain and establish snch arid so many by-laws, j rules, and ordinancas relating to the time of meetings, the admission of members, the power and duties of officers thereof, and the ordering of the other concerns of the incorpo ration as they deem necessary and proper, Provided. That no by-law, rttie or ordinance as aforesaid, shall be valid if inconsistent with the constitution and by-laws of this State or of the United States. SECTION 4. That the officers of the said Association who were duly chosen at the lust annual election held for that purpose, shall continue in their respective stations until an election be made under this charter : and the by-lays, rules and ordinances of this Association. FOOLPHOVERBS.— Get drunk, yourself and say that your neighbor staggers. Stand on your head and say that the world is upside down. Spend your time poking tn cess-pools, and wonder that you get yourself dirty, Mind everybody's business aud wonder at their ingratitude. Stoue a dog and wouder that he barks at you. Act like Satan through the week, and wonder that you don't feel good on Sunday. 'What does cleave mean, papa 1" 'lt means to stick together," •Does John stick wood together when he cleaves it ?" 'Hem ! it means to seperate." 'Well, then, pa, does a man seperate from his wife when he cleaves to her ?" 'Don't ask foolish questions, child V, " Does Mr. Wilson live here ?" " Yes," was the reply of Mr. W's wife, " but he is not at home to-day," " I know heVnot at home now, but he will be very soon, for I've got him here dead in the wagon," The latest case of absence of minds is ; that of a ship carpenter, who bit off the end | of a copper spike and drove a plug of tobao 'co in the vessel's bottom. He did not dis j cover his mistake until the vessel spit in : his face. i He who goes to bed in anger, has the devil for a bed-fellow. A wag desires us to say that he knows a married man, who though he goes to bed meek and gentle as a lamb, is in the same predicament. THE report that a Yankee had invented a machine to take noise out of Thunder is contradicted. How to prevent flies from getting at your bacon in summer—eat it all in the winter. Laziness travels so slowly that poverty soon overtakes her. Why is an avaricious merchant like a Turk? Because he worships the Profit. REASON governs the wise man and cud gels the fool. TatrrH crushed to earth will raise again.