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Mras LARKIN'9 was bilious and feeble and atek. And ti seemed aa tf notbiug would ever reltOTO her. Her liver was ogKed with impurities thick. And her stuiuach was constantly burning with fever. Of the groat ft. M. D. sh bought a supply. And ireciion* for taking inntuu'd to the letter. •Twas the best hing on em tn she couKI possibly try. And VIM v soon. Miss Larkins was better. The O. M. I), she took was Dr. Pierce's Golden Medical Discovery, the great rem edy fur bronchial, throat and lunp diseases, sick headache, scrofula, dyspepsia and all diseases that have origin iu impure blood and a disordered liver. THB cleansing, antiseptic and healing qualities of Dr. Sago's Catarrh Remedy are unequaled. TWO OF the wealthiest men In the West are said to have been messenger bovs. It pays to go slow, after alL—Yonkers States- Homes for SO,OOOFamilies. Do not lose tho opportunity of your Ufa The good land in the recently eeaed lands of the Sioux reservation is not nearly all taken. Hero is tho best chance in the world for young men of energy. For further par ticulars write to tho Alliance Committee at Pierre, South Dakota. THE dog with tho appetite for trousers LA liable at any time to go on a tear.—Wash ington Post. THB most popular dancing figure atoong business men is bulaiicc to partners.—Rome Sentinel PAIN from indigestion, dyspepsia and too hearty eating is relieved at once by taking one of Carter's Little I-iver Pills immediate ly after dinner. Don't forget this. LOT* may be blind, but he knows when the oarlor lamp is too high.—Binghamton Leader. TESTED BY TIME. For Bronchial affec tions, Coughs, etc., BKOWN'S BHONCHIAL TROCHES have proved their efficacy by a test of many years. Price, 25 cts. THK most popular dentist is the on© who extracts tcetli without payin'.—Plunder. ACTORS. Vocalists. FublieSpeakers praise Bale's Honey of Horehounil and Tar. Pike's Toothache Drops Cure in one minute. REAI.IZIXO that time has wings the hotel waiter measures it from tip to tip. DON'T wait until you are sick before trying Carter's Little Liver Pills, but get a vial at once. You can't ta' e them without benefit. Two and two in an ice cream saloon mak a quartet.— N. O. Picayune. TITE best eouph medicine is Piso's Cure for Consumption. Sold everywhere. 25c. THERE arc oases when an auction sale Is a sell.—N. O. Picayune. OLI smokers prefer "Tansil's Punch." THE business of typewriting has come to be recognized as a direct step on the road to matrimony.—Uoston Herald. CFRES PROMPTLY AND PERMANENTLY LUMBAGO, Rheumatism, Headache, Toothache, S ll A I N S Neuralgia, Swellings, Frost-bite», 15 11 U I S E S THE CHARLES «. VOGELER CO., Baltimore, Ml OXE ENJOYS Both the method and results when Syrup of Figs is taken it is pleasant and refreshing to the taste, and acts gently yet promptly on the Kidneys, Liver and Bowels, cleanses the sys tem effectually, dispels colda, head aches and fevers mid cures habitual rrmetlpation. Syrup of Figs is the only remedy of its kind ever pro duced, pleasing to the taste and ac ceptable to the stomp.ch, prompt in its action and truly beneficial in its effects, prepared only from the most healthy and agreeable substances, its many excellent qualities com mend it to all and have made it the most popular remedy known. Svrup of Figs is for sale in 50c and $1 bottles by all leading drug gists. Any reliable druggist "who may not have it on hand will pro cure it promptly for any one who •wishes to try it Do not accept any substitute. CALIFORNIA FIG SYRUP CO. SAN FRANCISCO, CAL. LOUISVILLE. KY. HEW YORK. M.f. DOES CURE CONSUMPTION In its First Stages. Bet i yew pat (fee gwniffaM, MPUB1TIEC TMI In the LiverO When the Liver is crowded or clotted with a mass of imrmrities, its action becomes slow and difficult. Pleurisy^ Headachc, Pain in bide, Tired Feel* ing and Genera! Weakness ensues^ resulting-, if unchccked, in When you have these symptoms, try a few doses of the genuine DrlJclaoe'ssliver Pills Price, 25 cents. Sold by all druggists* and prepared only by Fleming Bros., Pittsburgh, i. Beware of counter feits made in St. Louis. IT ISRSEIT bj-ciin* !UE'8ofCIII I.OKEK. r.iouxand* ,ouDg men aad oimo to the I". S. A. owt their live* tod their health and theirhapptaess to Ridge's Food their rUilv diet In lafsnej and Childhood hiring bom RMgt'i Food. By DraggUM, •U 1H* I.KAD1SG FOOD II 30 OEJM «p- WIMIMIIOB ALL COUSTTTUU. MARY ANN'S BABY. High up at a garret window, whether in shine or rain, Day by day a babv sits, its face against the pane, And if it be sun or shadow, and if it be calm or blow, The mother goes to her labor out into the world below Yet she turns to look at the window, her hard face working with love. As she catches sight of her darling, set high in the casement abive And tho wizened face of the baby, the baby that seldom cries. Is puckered up in queer amaze as she looks at *Ue earth and skies. Poor Mary Ann! in the scalding suds she drops her scalding tears Those drops express the bitterness pent up for many years. 8he wrings the costly fabrics—ah! how her heart was wrung! It seems so very, very long slnoe she was bright and young Of all she had, of all she hoped, nothing to her remains But the pinched, half-famished baby looking through the window-panes. At thought of it her tears are dried, her grief is put away A joy inspires her aching heart, she can't be sad to-day. Si J" .Wtrf.« Fire, will be sent by Cragin & Life takes a soft and tender hue, hope blooms Co., Philada, Pa., to auy cue in the U. S. or Canada, postage paid, upon receipt of 25 Dobbins' Electric Soap wrappers. See list of novels on circulars around each bar. and bears again The nmiles light up her oare-worn faoe, she sings a low refrain. Of all the gifts God gave her, of all He let her keep, Is the baby In the window, now fallen fast asleep I —Emma M. Johnson, in Housekeeper's Weekly. MOTHER OF A CHIEF. Border Romance Narrated by One Concerned Iu It. Cynthia Ann, 'White Girl, Captured tn Childhood and Adopted by the Co manche s- Sh« Ptned for the HAT* age Life She JLed. The agitation of the Indian land ques tion brings to mind the tragedy and ro mance connected with the well-known Comanche chief, Quanah. His mother was a white woman, captured in her young girlhood by the Comanches, and taken from her home in Texas over into New Mexico. Her family, one of the most prominent of Texas, resided in Anderson County. I lived in Eastern Texas at the time, my parents' home being near that of Captain Parker. This is near what is now Palestine, then composed of a few cabins. It was away back in the days when Texas was a republic—a few years before she joined the sisterhood of States. I was a wee bit of a barefooted boy, attending my first school in the pine woods. I can still see, in my mem ory, that old school-house and its sur roundings. Some of the boys and girls who attended that old school are now men and women of prominence, known everywhere. The old school-house was made of pine logs with the bark on. Tbis bark served as a home for the scorpions, which made themselves free and easy in livening up the pupils, and the "tsek, tsek. tsek" of the sawyer worm work ing in those logs was the constant music of the day. The great wide chimney, made of cross sticks covered with clay and moss, was not the least picturesque of the surroundings. The inevitable spring branch was just under the hill, whore we got water from the spring and waded in the brook with our little juvenile sweethearts, a pastime for which we inevitably received the good old-style thrashing. The desks were simply rough pine boxes with the lids sloping toward you, held on by strips of leather for hinges. The seats were pine slabs, hewn smooth on the straight sur face, holes bored in the under side and pegs driven into them for legs. Each bench extended the length of half the room. The floor was what was called a puncheon. This was made of pine slabs, split and put together as closely as pos sible, and pegged to the sleepers. Pick ing splinters out of the bare feet of the "scholars," as the pupils were called, was a regular business, the puncheon floors furnishing splinters every day and every year, from generation to gen eration. Many a tender little feminine heart was captured while its owner, playing the surgeon, was picking the splinters out of the feet of some youth ful Romeo, who bravely kept back the tears, when it was plain to the tender hearted surgeon that he was suffering mortal agony. There was in this school a very pretty blue-eyed little maiden about my own tender age. She was named Cynthia Ann, daughter of Captain John Parker. Cap tain Parker was quite "a big man" in the neighborhood lived in a large "plank" house with real glass windows and green blinds. Favored, indeed, was the boy who could win a smile from or claim the favor of sweet little Cynthia Ann. Wasn't her father member of the Texas Congress? So I was the envy of all the boys, as Cynthia Ann and I be came fast friends, and, of course? I was the cause of many a fight In a short time we acknowledged, without blush ing, that we were sweethearts, Cynthia Ann and I. In fact, she was not back ward in letting it be known herself. This settled the dispute, but resulted in more fights and some few lickings for me. One dark night the Comanche Indians, then raiding in that part of Texas, were announced in our neighborhood. Every body took shelter in the block house nearest his immediate abode. Captain Parker's family took refuge in the great Foster block house, near where Pales tine now is. The Indians attacked this nd killed and scalped every one of the inmates, including all of Captain Par ker's family except Cynthia Ann. They carried her into captivity away into the barren hills of New Mexico. As many men as could be spared from the neigh borhood followed the Indians for several weeks, hoping to be able to retake Cvn I hia Ann, but they were unsuccessful. I In 18(51 Colonel L. Sul. Ross, of Waco, then commander of thb Texas Rangers, afterwards distinguished as a dashing cavalry General at the head of the Texas troops during the late war, who is now Governor of Texas, gave battle to an invading band of Comanches in tho Northwestern part of the State. He utterly routed them, killing and captur i ing many of their warriors. Among the latter was an exceptionally fierce little brave who refused to surrender until a I six-shooter was pointed at him and was on the point of being discharged. He then threw up his hands and in a soft, feminine voice cried out: "Americana! Americana!" Throwing back the red covering of skins he revealed to the astonished Texans the neck, throat and breast of a woman, and, though she was browned by exposure, they immediately saw that she was undoubtedly of white parent age.' She was dressed as were the other warriors, and was fiercer and more skill ful than any of them. Colonel Ross sent hor with the other prisoners to the capital of the State. The Legislature was in session. I was then serving my first term as legislator, and was put on the committee to make disposition of the Indians. Through the medium of an interpreter I had an interview with the captured squaw, as I imagined she mnst have a very interesting history. What was my surprise and sorrow to learn that she was my little sweetheart of earlier days, Cynthia Ann Parker, who had been captured seventeen years before. She wys recognized by her jncle, Hon. Dave Parker, then and for nearly thirty years afterward a member of the Legislature. She was taken to ids home, which is still near Palestine. There were no railroads then in Texas, all travel being by horseback or wagon. Cynthia Ann made repeated efforts to escape from her white friends and it re quired their utmost vigilanoe to take her to her future home. Gradually reoolleotions of her early life, which had been obliterated by her savage surroundings, came back to her. Her memory was aided more by the woodland scenes around her old haunts, and more especially by the rude school house surroundings than by any thing that could be drawn from or imparted to her in tho way of conversation. She then gave an account of her life among the Indians. She loved to tell of their uniform kindness and tenderness to her. After growing to maturity she was made the wife of the old chief, by whom she had one son, whom she named Quanah. She constantly grieved for her son and her dusky husband and for the old Indian life, and made fre quent efforts to escape and return. Every thing possible was done for her by relations and friends, and she had every comfort and every luxury yet it was plain to all that under the re straints and restrictions of civilization she was fretting and pining her life away. She told them that her captivity among her own people was worse than i,oqw her captivity among the Indians. The burden of her longings, her sighs and her plaintive songs was for the old In dian life and for her absent husband and child. She was ever gentle and loving but, like a tender flower transplanted from balmy atmospheres and soft skies to i uncongenial climes, keen air, gray skies and chilly winds, she drooped and died. She survived her return home about seven years. Her warrior husband, Big Buffalo, be came fiercer and bolder in his forays from New Mexico down into Texas, try ing to recapture fris wife and avenge himself on the pale face. He was final- I ly killed in a battle near Fort Worth a few years after his wife's capture. Quanah, who was almost a man, suo ceeded his father as chief of the tribe, under the name of Quanah Parker. In April, 1885, I was visiting my ranch in Archie County, near the South line of the Indian Territory, and stopped at a hotel at Wichita Falls. I noticed among the guests a tall, well-dressed, graceful and intelligent-looking Indian. His complexion proclaimed him to be a half breed. On inquiry, 1 ascertained that it was the celebrated chief of the Com manches, Quanah Parker. When introduced to him I told him I that I had known his mother in her beautiful young girlhood that I had been a schoolmate of hers, and had seen her often in her last days. He showed great interest and the delight ol a boy at meeting some one who had known her. He said he had known his mother's history from his boyhood, and he felt he had no right to attempt to get her back from her friends and relations. He thus early exhibited those noble traits and high-minded characteristics which have enabled him to lead his tribe to the progress they are making. While he was talking he took mo aside, that his friends might not see what they would consider unmanly tears in his eyes. Quanah Parker is one of the best known of the younger Indian chiefs. He is wealthy, owns large herds of cat tle and horses, has immense pastures and well-cultivated fields, and last, but by no means least, five wives and numerous children. I asked him about the personal appearance of his squaws, and he replied, with a genuine Indian shrug: "Ugh! heap pretty—all sweet." And then he smiled as if he knew that this was the Indian side of his nature which I could neither appreciate nor approve. He gave me a cordial invita tion to visit him in the Territory. He said that he could promise me an abun dance of game and fish and a good time generally at his wigwam. I may remark that his "wigwam" is a very commodious and handsomely furnished house. In December, 1885, Quanah's life came near terminating at the time his co chief, Yellow Bear, met his death. They were at the Pickwick Hotel, in Fort Worth, Tex., and occupied a suite of rooms. Yellow Bear blew out his gas, and in the morning Quanah was found almost beyond recovery, while Yellow Bear, in the adjoining room, had entirely yielded up his ghost and gone direct to the Indians' happy hunting-ground. He was taken to the Territory and buried by his tribe. His funeral is said to have been the largest and most affect ing that has ever been in the Territo ry. The grief of his tribe was probably greatest that he met his death by the common practice of a pale-faced Con gressman. Quanah Parker is unquestionably the wisest, the most progressive and the most advanced chief the Comanches have ever had. This is undoubtedly due to the inheritance of his mother's intelligence. The Comanches have al ways been noted for their fierceness, their intrepid bravery and their love of war. They have always been the best riders among all the Indian tribes, and have always demanded a chief who would lead out these savage character istics in them. "The ways of Providence are myste rious and past finding out." In the light of what has been accomplished, .and what will yet be done through Quanah Parker, Cynthia Ann Parker's capture was not altogether an Wm. A. Bowen, in N. Y. Sun. AN IDEAL SMALL BOY, Did Ever Such a Young One as This Breathe in Oar Country?, Johnny (aged six years, brother to Amelia)—My sister, Mr. Spoonee, will be up directly. She is now engaged in washing supper dishes. Mr. Spoonee—I thought young ladies left that business for their mothers to attend to. Johnny—Some young ladies who think only of their own ease may leave such work for their mothers, but Amelia never does. She never permits mother to do any thing which she can do her self. 1 don't think I ever saw a young lady who kept herself so busy about the house. Really, I think she is never so happy as when at work. Mr. Spoonee—Tell me, Johnny, does she ever say any thing about me? Johnny—She frequently speaks of you as a gentleman whom no woman could help esteeming highly. You know she has many suitors, but never, she says, until she saw you, did she experience any thing approaching to love. Mr. Spoonee—Of course she knows that my fortune is ample, and— Johnny—Excuse me, sir, but while, of course, she is not insensible to the advantages of wealth, she has repeated ly said that when she weds it will be because of the love she bears the man who asks her hand. Mr. Spoonee—Come, Johnny, do you think she would have me? Johnny—I can't say positively, sir. I know she thinks well of you. Indeed, I am sure she can not fail of recogniz ing your worth. But there is a Mr. Quick who has pressed bis suit very in dustriously for some time, and if I may be allowed to make a suggestion, I should advise you to propose as quickly as possible. You will excuse me now, Mr. Spoonee. I hear Amelia on the stairs, and it might be embarrassing for you to meet in my presence. Good even ing, sir.—Boston Transcript. —Julia Ward Howe is said to be the best Greek •ohelM Qt bet MK ia the oountry. PERSONAL AND LITERARY. —Max O'Rell was recently Invited to pvrite an article for the North American Review on the subject of "Comic Jour lalism in Amerioa." "That means all pour journals," he replied, "for they are ill comic." —Gladstone has published one hun lred and ninety-nine books and pamph lets. This does not include his maga tine articles or any of his speeches. He has all his life been assimilating knowledge and giving out ideas. —Stepniak, the exiled Russian Nihil ist, lives quietly in London with his gifted wife, and the two spend much time in the British Museum, ransack ing books and making many notes. Stepniak is an industrious writer, and Is rarely seen at the clubs or in so ciety, although he has a host of friends. —Bret Harte is as dainty and fastidi ous in all his ways as he is in his writ ings. It is related of him that once while visiting friends with his family he was late at breakfast one morning, and Mrs. Harte explained his tardiness by saying that she left him "trying to match a cravat with the stockings he had decided to wear for the day." }ueen Victoria has written two which have never been published. They are volumes of travel, and recount her impressions of various places on the continent. She has been so an noyed at tho criticisms of her published works that she has refused to have these manuscripts put into print.* They will be published after her death. —The Peking Gazette appears in two editions, one written and one printed daily, with exception of festival days. The written edition appears on the day of the date the paper bears. The printed edition, which has to be cut in wood, an operatirw which takes a considerable time, appears some weeks later. Only tba most important news is given in tho written edition the other publishes it quite fully. —Browning was at dinner at the house of a friend when he saw the phon ograph for the first time. He was greatly interested in it, and started to repeat to it "The Ride from Ghent to Aix." When half through he stopped suddenly and exclaimed: "I've forgot ten the rest!" The phonograph dutiful ly repeated all he had said, including the exclamation at the end, and the film upon which the poet's language was i^nprQSsed is now preserved as a precious relic. —Thomas Nelson Page, in a paper read before the Nineteenth Century Club re cently, said that in the South, poetry, in many respects, had not kept pace with prose. Dialect had undoubtedly been used by Southern writers to ex cess, but there was much to be said in its defense, and in defense of those who used it. On the whole, the South pre sented a field for literature such as could not be found elsewhere, and the conditions for a literature existed there as they did not in any other section or country. HUMOROUS. —"Mercy, Sidney! what makes yon look so serious?" "I'm writing some verses n spring." "Blank verse, or rhyme?" "Blank, so far. I've only got one line.'' —Harpers Bazar. —Pater—"On your prospects will de pend my acceptance of you as a son-in law." Would-be Son-in-Law—"H'm. Well, ray prospects depend entirely on your acceptance of me as your son-in law."—Life. —Well rate!—Father—"Clara, I think the Count will propose to-night" Clara (excited)—"What makes you think so, papa?" Father—"I discovered him in the hotel to-day looking me up in 'Brad streets."—Kearney Enterprise. —Young ladies— would you guess Itf—are like arrows, don't you know. They can not pierce a single heart until they get a beau And like the arrows, which without a bow oaa nothing do, Young ladies, till they get a beau, are in a quiver, too. —Oakland (Cal.) Echoes. —Mother—"Willie, where are the dried pears that were in the pantry?" Willie—"All gone, mamma." Mother— "I know that, you naughty child. Did you eat them?" Willie (boldly)—"How could I when it says on the box 'Evap orated Fruit.' Guess they just 'vap orated 'fore I could get 'em."—Pitts burgh Dispatch. —"How did you succeed in farming, Plowdeepe? Make a fortune?" "Naw! Lost two thousand the first year, and then abandoned the business and re turned to the city." "What are you do ing now?" "Editing an agricultural journal which has for its motto: 'How to make money on the farm.'"—Demo rest —"Have you seen M. Millack's famous painting, 'The Angleworms,' now on exhibition?" said the boy to the fish. "Come ashore and we'll have a look at it "Naw," said the fish, "and I think it has been over-rated. You mistake my identity, I'm not a sucker. The fitful, fretful shimmer on the water's surface prcoably distorts your view of me. Call agin in June." "I'll drop you a line," said the boy.—Merchant Traveler. —Miss Brainy (of Boston) "I want to have you send home a suit of clothes for my little brother Willie. He is eleven years of age." Salesman—"Yes, midam. Should you say—er, that he waa large or stnall for his age?" Miss evil.— Brainy—"Well, I don't know that Willie has any superfluity of adipose tissue as oompared with other boys of his age, bt.t he is usually in the habit of arriving at his destination with both pedal ex tremities firmly placed on this mundane sphere." CONQUERED HIMSELF. A Valuable Leiiaon Learned In Five Min ute* or Less. "So you wish to learn Christian science," said a teacher of that "doc trine" to a lank fellow that had applied for tuition. "Yes, sir. What are your terms?" "Five dollars for three lessons." "Ail right I'll take the first lesson right now." The teacher then began to lay down the principles of the "science." "You must first learn," said he, "to conquer self "All right" the pupil answered. "You must exterminate every human desire must give yourself up to the ruling of your spirit instead of yield ing to a single impulse of the body." "All right" the student agreed. "Well," the teacher one day re marked when the term had been com pleted, "1 think that you are now pre pared to graduate with honors." "All right much obliged." "But have you not forgotten some thing?" the teacher asked when the Btudent had started out "No, reckon not" "Yes, you have forgotten to me the five dollars." "Oh, you see, I had a strong desire to pay you—a very strong desire of the flesh, as it were, but have succeeded in conquering all that sort of thing. So long."—Arkansaw Traveler. The Rilling Passion. Doctor—How's your wife this morn ing, Mr. Bagley? Bagley—I'm afraid she's pretty near ieatb, doctor. Doctor—Has she had any sinking ipell? Is she growing weaker? Bagley—No but she's been bossing ne around lively this morning, and, fou know, doc. that the ruling strong in death. Judge. SCHOOL AND CHUROH. —In Iceland there are 200 Luther&B jharches, with a population of 70,000. —Word comes from Carleton College, Minnesota, that every young lady in that institution is believed to be a Christian. —At Columbia City, Cal., a church organization under the name of "The Comeouters" has been carrying on a series of meetings. The members claim that they are without sin, and are the chosen of the Lord. —The United States has 361 colleges, with 4,442 instructors and 70,024 stu dents 159 institutions for the higher education of women, with 1,854 instruc tors: 90 schools of science, 145 schools of theology, and 50 of law. —Miss Susannah Warfield, a wealthy unmarried woman who died recently at her home, "Groveland," Carroll County, Md.. left all her property to found an Episcopal college which is to be named after her. The endowment amounts to about $100,000. —Wesleyan University, Middletown, Conn., lately received a rare and valua ble gift from an alumnus, Marcus L. Taft of Brooklyn, N. Y. It is some 1,500 Chinese coins representing every dynasty and every Emperor, some of them ante-dating several hundred years the Christian era. —Miss Hankey, the first woman ever graduated at Columbia, is to be com memorated by a window in the college library. The design is an allegorical representation of her career as a scholar, cut short by death. There are three principal figures, those of science, an angel, and a student. —The First Congregational Church o'l Amherst, Mass., celebrated a few days ago the 150th anniversary of its found ing. A historical address was delivered by its pastor, Rev. G. S. Dickerman, who traced the development of tho church from the small band of eighteen founders to the present society of 450 members. —Education does not seem to make people any the less superstitious. About fifteen hundred different kinds of dream books are in the market, and all of them find buyers, while sales steadily increase about in proportion to the increase of people. Nor is the de mand for dream books confined to the poor. Women with sealskins and dia monds buy them. —Jay Gould, it is said, pays $2, .W0 for a pew in Dr. Hall's church. Al though fairly regular at the morning service he never appears in the evening. Russell Sage, on the contrary, is in his slip at both services. The combined con tributions of these financial Christians are estimated at 610.000 a year, or 81,000 a month. All nameless offerings of $300 or more, which are by no means rare, are attributed to these gentlemen. —The Central Board of Canadian Methodist Missions met recently and appropriated $210,582 to its missions Indian, Domestic, French Canadian, Japan and Chinese. The whole Domin ion is included in the field of its opera tions, and also Newfoundland and Ber muda. The contemplated union of the Methodist Episcopal, Methodist Episco pal South, and Canadian Missions in Japan into one Methodist church in that Empire gives great satisfaction. —The widow of an English clergyman left by her will a large sum to be paid to the chaplain of a consumptives' home and to two clergymen in charge of churches on the condition that they read her departed husband's sermons to the people under their charge. Through a wrong description of the funds she dedicated to this purpose the legacy was frustrated. So both sick and well were spared having those sermons in flicted on them. But when was thera ever before such a proof of wifely ad miration of a husband's sermons?— Christian Inquirer. THE WAYS OF WOMEN. they Are Decided y Contradictory These .Statements Are True. II The average woman stays in the house on pleasant days and visits twenty-threa stores in an afternoon when the wind's speed has to be taken with a lightning rod. She will rail for twenty-five years against the barbarous fashion of boring the ears, and then she will punch holes in her ear lobes with a darning needle if there is a ghost of a chance of getting a pair of diamond ear-rings. She will take two hours to dress and run back into the house three times il she is going over to Minnie's to spend the afternoon and the next day, when she has a sudden chance to go to San Francisco, she will pack a tooth-brush and her purse in her pocket button her cloak and gloves on the street-car, and be at the station three-quarters of an hour ahead of the train. She spills coffee on the clean table cloth and smiles sweetly—when there is company and then she glares like a healthy demon if William Ilenry lays the carving knife on the table when they are alone. She carefully mends a rent a quarter of an inch long in her gloves, and goes for days with a tear two feet long in her petticoat. She will put sealskin buttons on a plush sacque, and expects the whole world to believe that it is real fur. She can hold forty-seven pins in het mouth and give an order to the grocery boy that will fill the market baskets and a milk pail. She laughs because the Smith girls wear old-fashioned bonnets, and cri's because she knows of some poor boy who can't afford a winter overcoat She will arrange a silk scarf over a picture frame until a man's eye will bulge out with admiration, but she can't tie a plain, ordinary necktie to save her life. She will walk up street in the rain to save a street-car fare, and then she will give a quarter of a dollar to the first beggar she meets. She will go over every carpet in the house with a damp cloth and a brush, and then go down town with a black spot on her nose. She will give a good course of lecturos upon the history, general appearance and people of the Roman empire, and then she would get lost if she tried to go from Buffalo to Attica without an es cort. She will read an essay on our inhuman treatment of fhe red man, and then she locks the door if she sees a sassafras vender coming in at the side gate. She will fry beefsteak and expect the man of her choice to eat it She is altogether a lovable creature and she knows it—Buffalo Expresa Silk and Wool Monrning- Drexses. For mourning dresses this season are new silk and wool fabrics in light qual ities imitating China crapes, and a ser viceable silk called Antoinette surah is for light mourning. This fabric shows heavy diagonal lines in the weaving. Bordered, plaided and striped surabs in black and white India silks with black grounds, widely or narrowly striped in white, and white grounds with all-over arabesque designs, large polka dots, and floral and geometrical patterns, are' also exhibited for the spring and summer. White, black, and gray ginghams follpw the block and check patterns recently noted in new colored cottons. Fiije white batistes, French lawns, and sheet organdies delicately hem-stitched and finished on the skirts with very deep hems will be worn all summer by those in mourning also those of india muslin dresses finished with black off brier-stitching.—N. T. Poet SOLDIERS INDIA. Were It Hot brTktlr Dogs Their BditMH WtuM Be a Dreary One. Were it not for his dog Tommy Atklni in India would find things hang hear? en his hands for his life would getrusty for the want of a whistle, his hands bs idle when not teaching his dog tricks. A favorite holiday and Sunday morning's pastime was to go rat-catching. Around most Indian oantonments there are usu ally plenty of rat-holes, mostly inhabit ed, and to dislodge rats was our favo* ite sport. Calling together our pack wa retired to the neighborhood of the rat holes and commenced operations. Now, no ordinary dog can follow a rat into his hole. Certainly he can tear up a good deal of soil from around the mouths of the holes, but that is all. If snuff ing in a rat's hole would oust a rat, thea our dogs would have succeeded, for the vigorous way in which they snuffed in those holes would have turn ed many a hole inside out. But those artful rodents—conscious of a dog's snuffing powers, mayhap—burrowed their holes both deep and winding, and only to lit a rat's circumference, so thai they had to be circumvented independ ently of dogs'clawings and sniffs. Butoui those rats had to come se we went foi buckets of water ourselves or hired a native water-carrier to fetch us some, when, by sheer swamping out, the rati quitted their holes and came on top. Then our expectant dogs had their in nings for the half-drowned rats, after a peep at daylight again, only escaped drowning to find them selves seized by the back, pitched high above a dog's head with a broken spine and their life shaken out of them. It was interesting, too, to see the young* er dogs trying their first bite and learn ing rat-catching tricks from their oldei brethren. We used to stand round and enjoy the fun and, I'm sure, felt sorry that we hadn't dog's jaws for the nonce, so that we might get down on our hands and knees and enjoy a good "rat worry." Anyhow, we used to follow our dogs' movements with an eye for a rat and oui jaws in motion, while our teeth snapped and our chins dropped as we saw them giving the rats their coup.—St James' Gazette. A WELSH HERCULES. He Threw a Man and Hli Donkey Over High Stone Wall. Sir Nicholas Kemeys, Bart, of Cefn Mably, was accounted one of the strong est men of his day, and a tradition of him, corroborative of his great strength, still exists in Glamorganshire. The story runs that one summer evening as Sir Nicholas was walking in the deer park at Cefn Mably with some guests, an athletic man leading an ass, upon which was his wallet, approached, and respectfully saluting the company, said he humbly supposed that the huge gen tleman he had the honor of addressing was the strong Sir Nicholas Kemeys. The stranger, being answered in the affirmative, declared himself a noted Cornish wrestler, who had never been thrown, and having heard from a Welsh man, whom he had met at Bristol, of the great bodily strength of Sir Nicho las, had made this journey to see his honor, adding that, if it were not ask ing too" great a favor, he trusted Sir Nicholas would condescend to "try a fall" with him. The Baronet, smilingly assented, but advised the Cornishman to first go to the buttery and get refresh ment. The Cornishman declined with many thanks, saying he was quite fresh so they fell to wrestling, and in a moment the Cornishman w «S thrown upon his back. The Baronet assisted him to rise, asking him if he was now satisfied of his strength. The reply was: "Not unless you throw me over the park wall." The tale continues to say that this request was readily complied with, "when the unsatisfied wrestler entreated that Sir Nicholas would throw his ass after him over the wall, which was ac cordingly done! A place is still shown in the ancient park wall as the scene of the exploit. A fine picture now at Cefn Mably, in the possession of Colonel Kemeys-Tynte, representing Sir Nicholas as of great stature and apparent gigantic strength. He was subsequently killed at Chesstow Castle in defending it against the troops of Cromwell, having slain many of the enemy with his own hand in the sortie in which he fell.—Spectator. Prompt and Careful. Mr. Tick—How long will it take you to .make me a suit of clothes? Tailor—Three days. Mr. Tick—All right and I'll settle the bill in just sixty days from to-day. You'll have 'em ready on time now won't you? Tailor—Yes, sir they'll be ready in just sixty-three days.—Smith, Gray & Co.'s Monthly. —A picturesque character who recent ly died in Washington County, Georgia, was noted for trading jack-knives. On the handle of every knife he ever owned he made a little private mark, by which he could recognize it if it ever came in to his bands again. —In some parts of Asia the tanned skin of the sajmon yields a prettily marked scale-liked leather, and ray I skins a good imitation of morocco. Deafnefli Can't Be Cared by local applications, as they can not reach the diseased portion of the ear. There is only one way to cure Deafness, and that is by constitutional remedies. Deafness is caused by an inflamed condition of the mu cous lining of the Eustachian Tube. When this tube gets inflamed you have a rumbling sound or imperfect hearing, and when it is entirely closed Deafness is the result, and unless the inflammation can be taken out and this tube restored to its normal condi tion, hearing will be destroyed forever nine cases out of ten are caused by catarrh, i which is nothing but an inflamed condition of the mucous surfaces. We will give One Hundred Dollars for any case of Deafness (caused by Catarrhs that we can not cure by taking Hall's Catarrh Cure. Send for circulars, free. F. J. CHEXEY & Co., Toledo, Q. Sold by Druggists, 75c. IFaman does not care to live let him um pire base-bail or go hunting with an ama teur sportsman.—N. O. Picayune. Consumption Rarely Cared. ToTHteEniTOB:—Pleaseinform your read ers that I have a positive remedy for the above named disease. By its timely use thousands of hopeless cases have been per manently cured. I shall be glad to send two bottles of my remedy FIIEE to any of your readers who nave consumption if they will send me their express and post-oftlce ad dress. Respectfully, T. A. SLOCUM, M. C., 181 Pearl street, New York. Whew a man doesn't impose on his wife she acquires the idea that he no longer loves her.—Washiuprton Star. Physicians Wise In Their Generation. The above class of scientists recognize, and have repeatedly borne testimony, to the ef ficacy of Hostetter's Stomach Sitters as a remedy and preventive of fever and ague, rheumatism, want of vigor, liver complaint and some other ailments and infirm condi tions of the system. Experience and ob servation have taught them its value. They but echo the verdict long since pronounced by the public and the press. Only the be nighted now are ignorant of America's tonic and alterative. THE medical expert in a murder trial is generally introduced to confuse the Jury men.—Texas Siftings. A Lady In Booth Carolina Writes: My labor was shorter and less painful Ulan on two former occasions physicians astonished: I thank you for "Mother's Friend." It is worth its weight in gold. Address the Bradfleld Reg. Co., Atlanta, Qa for particulars. Bold by all druggists. W* can learn nothing about the toma hawk from books on ornithology^—Pitts burgh Chronicle. FISH-BALLS are allowable in Lent—IT. O Rcaynne. i BEAUTY WITHOUT PAINT. That's not the cure, my charming Miss," The doctor said—1"Remember this: If you your skin would keep from taint* Discard the powder and the paint" March, April, May are the Months when the Blood should be renovated with Ayer's Sarsaparilla What makes my skin so dark and muddy My cheeks were once so smooth and ruddy. I use the best cosmetics made:" Is what a lovely maiden said. and the System fortified for the change of Seasons. Prepared by Dr. J. C. Ayer & Co., Lowell, Mass. S-IWD THM Latest Styles -IN L'Art De La Mode. 7 C01.01£KI 1'I.ATKS. ILL TUB MTEST PiRt* AND BXW YORK FASHIONS. *£7* Orrtnr it of your News-dealer or •eit'1 cmt* for latest, nuoibr to \V. J. MOICKfC. Publlnhrr, 8 Kant liKh St., Aiew Y«rk» rNAMK THIS PAPER twry time jouwriU. rSTABLISHED—Iflgc 15 TSia STREEWffASHINGTON O.C. ^OPINIONS RENDERED AS TO THE NOVELTY OF INVENTIONS AND VALIDITY OF PATENTS. REJECTED APPLICATIONS PROSECUTE!) .AIL BUSINESS RELATING TO INVENTIONS AND PATENTS PROMPTSATTWDCD TO SEND STAMP FOR PAMPHLET To rnrft Biliousness. Slrk TTondaohe. ron^tlpatloil. Malaria. Liver Complaints, take tho aafd and certain remedy, SMITH'S I E E A N S Use the SMALL SIZK (40 little beans to the bot tle*. They me the most convenient: suit all ages. Price of either s!ie, 25 cento per bottle. If IQQIIMO at 7- 17. 70: Photo-eranire, panel size of this picture for 4 cents tcoppers or stamps). J. F. SMITH have specif lc effect on theae organs. Stimulating tbe bowels, giving natur al discliari without straining »r griping, and IMPARTING VIGOR to the kidneys, bladder and llv« They are adapted to old or young. SOLD EVERYWHERE. MADE WITH BOILING WATER. E s S GRATEFUL-COMFORTING. MADE WITH BOILING MILK. ANEWCOUNTRY! The "Moo" Kail way open* up The proper thing for all such ills Is this," remarked the man of pills: Enrich the blood and make it pure— In this you'll find the only cure." For cleansing, purifying and enriching the blood, Dr. Pierce's Golden Med* ical Discovery has no equal. It cures all humors from a common Blotch or Eruption to the worst Scrofula. Salt-rheum, Scaly or Rough Skin, in short all diseases caused by bad blood are conquered by this powerful, purifying, and invigorating medicine. Great Eating Ulcers rapidly heal under its benign influence. Especially has it manifested its potency in curing Tetter Eczema, Erysipelas, Boils, Carbuncles, Sore Eyes, Scrofulous Sores and Swellings, Hip joint Disease, "Fever-sores,'' "White Swellings," Goitre, or Thick Neck, and Enlarged Glands. OPl'BRED for an incurable case of Catarrh in the Head bjT the proprietors of DR. SAGE'S CATARRH REMEDY. SYMPTOMS OF CATARRH.—Headache, obstruction of nose, dischargee failing into throat, sometimes profuse, watery, and acrid, nt others, thick, tenacious, mucous, purulent, bloody and putrid eyes weak, ringing in ears, deafness, difficulty of clearing throat, expectoration of offensive matter breath offensive smell and taste impaired, and general debility. Only a few of these symptoms likely to be present at once. Thousands of cam result in consumption and end in the grave. By its mild, soothing, antiseptic, cleansing, and healing properties. Dr. Page's Remedy cures the worst cases. This infallible remedy does not, like the poisonous irritating snuffs, "creams" and strong caustic solutions wita which the public have long been humbugged. Simply palliate for a short time, or drive the in the use of such nostrums, but dfcwwe In the lunv. it produces TERRITORY. ill *CO.. Makers of "Bile Beans. St. JXJUIS, Mo. Advice to the Aged. brinffs infirmities.nnoh us •Inc- Ser lxli bowel*, weak kidneys and blad and torpid liver. Tutt's Pills tracts of Pine, Henloek and Hardwood Timber in Wisconsin and Michigan SPLE1IDIB CHANCES FOR MAW MILLS and FACTORIES. Timbered Farming Lands CHEAP and mostly on time. Railway Co. Pays Caah Tor Cordwoud* Mdr«s"$00" RAILWAY, as there is danger of d' ing perfect aud permanent cures of lb* worst ca*es of Chronic Catarrh, as thousands can testify. "Cold In the Head" is cured with a tew applications. Catarrhal Headache is relieved aud cured as if by magic. By druggists, 50 cent?. U E Best Cough Medicine. Recommended by Physicians Cures where all else fails. Pleasant and agreeable to taste. Children take it without objection. By druggists. VASELIKE PREPARATIONS.: On reccipt of price In postage stamps wewilJscnd free by mail the following valuable articles: One Box of Pure Vaseline, 10 Cents. One Box of Vaseline Camphor Ice. 10 Cts. One Box of Vaseline Cola Cream.15 Cts. One Cake of Vaseline Soap 10 Cents. One Bottle of Pomade Vaseline, 15 Cents. If yon have occasion to oae "Vaseline" In an form be careful to accept only genuine goods pot np by us in original packages. A great many drnL'gint* are trying to persuade bnyere to take Vaseline Preparations put np b' them. Never yield to such Tiersuacion. as the i.rticle is sn imitation without value and will not do good nor give yon the resu't you expect. A two ounce bottle of Blue Seal Vaseline is Mild by all druguists at ten cent*. No Vnelinc i genuine unlets our oame it on the UbeL Clesebrough Mfg. Co., 24 State St., N. Y. 5WOOS Timber Lands IN NORTHERN WISCONSIN. _Will be flo'd at 95.00 tin ACRE, on TIME, to AC TI 8KTTLRRS. Rich *11 —healthful cliinuU'—AI. kooJ drinking water—fine mar* ket icil ti- stoady demand for lnh«»r at (rood wugn. PI JKHARK NOW A\I) HATS CHOICE OF I.ANIIS. FCLL INPOUMATION. WITH MAPS, PAMPHLETS, ETC., JETC., JX'UN1SH*D FKE£. Addro«s LAND COMMISSIONER, mL wwA?k?E,'W TRADE MARK. The Braid that is kiown the world around. I CURE FITS! When I pay cure 1 do not moan merely to itop then for a time and then have them return a^rain. radical cure. I have made the disease of F1TS.EFI-*meanI LEPSY or FALLING SICKNESS a life-long ntudy. 1 rant my remedy to eure the worst war case?. BECAUM others have failed lx no reason for not now receiving ft cure. R-nd at onrc fur a treatise and A Free ottle of mv infallible remedy. fSive Kxnre** and PoM-Oflle®. K.'FI. HOOT. M. C., 1*15 Pearl Jiew Y«HU «®-NAME THIS PAPER •rrry ti»« ROW write. 500 WANTED SALESMEN. Afoodehane*. Don't mips it. You need no capital and no experience to represent a reliable firm that warrant* nursery stock flrst-cla.'S. WORK ALI* THK YKAK, and pood pay weekly to energetic and successful men. WRITK rou TERM*ATO.vr and stctkb Address L. K A Y JU C«., arwrr wen F!oH«U and Pcedsmen. ST.PAIL, MUlft THIS PAPER ittry il«»« you write. Ir. W AL'-EE-M At'GII, TFCE Great IRIIH D*ETAR, Positively, Pleasantly and Vena a neatly CopeaFITH-riT8-FIT8, BY ladiaa FI I K Roots, Barks, Plants, etc. Rend for ILLUS trated Book on FIT* an.I one mont pie treatment Free, h«'sam- tw the W4RKRHA(7VK rl I 9 |\DUN HPIJUTSIC (O.. ROtnkSTEfc, IjUUam. •T5AMF. THIS PAPER •»«7 yen write. $75.22toS250.22 workinjf for tis.Personapre lerred who can furnish a horse and itire their who!* tiine to the business. Spare moments may GAPC$j be profitably emploved also. A few rncnncles in towns and ctttoa. B. F. JOHNSON "., 1009 Main St., Richmond,?* O^NAME THIS PAPEK**«T7 tlm* mwntc CHOLERA and ROUP destroy yoar Poultry. tten4 15 one-cent stamps for largelllastrated catalafva. Tells yon how yoa ran learn to prevent and car# «J1 their diseases. A. H. LAN€i, ««r P3:••- COT© Dale, |ENSION'Wanhlnston, 0,,NW WOH,u*1. i C. ^iuocessfully PROSECUTES CLAIMS. Late Principal Bxamiccr U. S. 1 enslon BUNU. 3 j*rs in Nst 15 r\»! jmiieatin'* rlalmt, att TIIIS PAPER irry rim« wrtt#. PATENTS! $5 O O A Invent n*»th»ri* nr\d matt -•e FORTUNE! or instHi'fTiovs FREE. Addr*«« W. T. FTTZGEKALD. WASHINGTON, D. C. WltAMI TUU PAP£R WW) write. AKFNK WiMTPn f°rSTA*MTH AlWAfromorl®. AOLIII 0 f* All I LU in.il manuscript, photographs, maps, charts, etc. erantly Illustrated. The mosteom» Dlete and rivld pen picture #*vrr written. Sella at afgfet. Kitraordinaiy Inducements will be riv»*n to reliable afenu. Address *. K, DIB BUI CO., faikkm, fillflO. to $8 a day. Bnmplca worth $2.15 FREE. IJm»*not' m«i»t h'ir*e«' feet. Writ# BltK* TKR&AKKTT RKI* IlOMtKRCO., HeJ iW-NiMl THIS PAPER •vary ttau TOq writ* STANLEY BOOK ia flflS WA5TED. F.gPYRKAL Pin. IIOISK, 8T. FAtL,ha. WAXI TBIS PAPER tiwy tlMymvrlU. Positively CUKEH without th« i so of tbe knife at ihe lOLA CANCERS! 1 CO 1 AN- CEIl INFIHMARY. lOLA, WW. OT-KAXE THIS PAPIR mry ttas ftUAIflC I A line I IooArs^ «MrB,K. eh«w.l4a| WnUlUC LMllfOl crclUA lowinierMi. tfeodferaapa Baateni Re*. Aft. W. *!••.! anJll u J. W.1AXR THIS PAPER A. Raw, SiftusCttf,!* t**rj I IIAUp BTI DY. Book-keeping,Penmanship,Arftfe* HllPIC metic, Shorthand, etc., thoroughly taught by mall. irenlars free. WBEJI BUTATTRCOUAKX, iar5AI'R TIIIS PAPF.R«««rT fkM ym write A. N. K.—G. ftBrrrae 128#, TO IM Mvuniucia jrucAm mm I