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!it« js4*,i A (kl i? 0 i£ iw% ife SIGHT H-UVDBES OF CZAR'BKEN JCILLBD IN BATTLE PULANTIB^. tf- hA**' r««d." 1 rv LU fc: LATTER ilfTf'?', ARE DUPED BY CLEVER FEINT jt 'Bombardment of Port Arthur Already lartiBg SevTO ^i',' Buznor of Naval Battle in Which Six Ships Have BeenSunk.^ fffrt "••..• •„•••.• f-i' Newchwang June 14.—Information has been received: here through hereto fore reliable channels that part of the Japanese force left at Pulantlen to checkmate the Russians' southward movement to relieve Port Arthur was attacked southeast of Shungnmao Sat urday'. After slight fighting the Japan 38e made a false retreat, the Russians hotly following them, when the Japan ese made a. flank movement, catching the Russians in a trap.1 The Russian losses are placed at 800 men. They then fell back on Kalchou and began to re treat along the Baimatgu-Tsaichou About 2,000 Russian infantry from Kalchou passed through Newchwang SundaV' morning accompanied t»y a large supply and hospital train. Several carts contained bandaged men The troops appeared to be fagged out an| showed every Indication of a long, forced march. The officers refused to furnish any information, but a nqn-commis sloned officer skid, that all tne troops were retreating from Tsaibhou.. Before he could say anything further he was reprimanded by a captain. Port- Arthur Bombarded. London, June, 14.rr-Accordiiig. to the Rome 'Tribunals Chefoo correspondent. Port ^Arthur has been boinbarded ihces santi^'for the last sdven days. All the western portions of the town, it is stat ed, have been destroyed. Several Rus sian warships have been damaged, the Japanese squadron backing up the land assaults, but keeping out of range of the fort guns. Dispatches from St. Petersburg byway of Paris iannounce that, despite the semi-official assurances that nothing of exceptional gravity has occurred at Port Arthur in the last few days, the wildest v, rumors continue to circulate at the Rus sian capital. According to these rumors, the Japanese already have occupied the advance defense works. The Russians' are reported to have blown up the bat tleships Retviza^, Czarevitch and Pal lada to prevent their capture., j_'' Great Naval Battle Reported. 1 St. Petersburg, June 14.—Rumors aire in circulation here tb the effect that a great navalbattle haa tak% Pj?$e off Port^Arthur, in which^t^ lour' Japanese battleships were sunk 'The Russian consulat Chefooreports the persistence of rumors there 6f a'sea fight near Port Arthur: His report is oil a line with previous reports to the ef feet that two Russian and.four Japanese J? ships have been lost. The ultimate re & jult of the fight is not stated. As there is no/confirmation of the report from any other source the authorities express -doubt as to its accuracy. Mysterious Jap Movements, The Japanese advance of columns north and south of Fengwangcheng is causing considerable mystification".: The preponderance of military opinion still inclines to the belief that the move ments in both directions are feints, al though the opinion that Gen- Kuroki has begun a serious advance by' both flanks against Liaoyang does not lack support ers. Renewed skirmishing is reported in the neighborhood of Siuyen, but there is no confirmation officially of the en gagement reported at Haicheng Sunday night^ as tirtviugr occurred 30 miles southeast of Haicheng, in the direction •of the, Fengwangcheng ?oad which. waa imported to jhayo resulted in the l'oes of two Japanese battalions. Should tlitt report turn out to be true it would show chat the Japanese are advancing toward Haicheng by'two roads, as the column ^reported engaged must have been dif ferent froin the one which drove out the Russians from Siuyen on the road fur W^Mr south. -. & l/'A Absolute confirmation is not obtain able of the report that Gen. Kuropatkin is dispatching troops from Mukden Against tlie eneniy's right. Extreme reticence is manifested at the war office |regirding] the military situation, which lis generally interpreted as foreshadow ing important developments in the im mediate future. While, the imlnence of\ a-decisive battle-between the two maih armies is distinctly discouraged news of fighting of a rather heavy char acter is anticipated. The lack of official dispatches from.Kuropatkin during the last 48 hours is regarded as Significant. Russians Retire. steoul, Korea, June 14.—According to Korevvoffidial reports receivedhqre the fetussian forces which were at Ninyong ave retired to Changjio- Silver Annivefs&ir Celebrated. Northfleld', Jun^ in celebration of the sil*«r anniversary t»f the-fJ»ndinS ofNort Wdseminary .. were fce|d hi6**tl®bhdai'v Ttoy were also .Jg«+ featureofthe opening brthe summer *Yi, season of conferencea. Addresses w^rfe ieliveriwi by W. Moody and P. H: Moody, soiis of the late Dwight L. •7 Moody itfhxfdtind'ed the Northfield «nm mer schools. Theire was a large attend- ance of.yiBitors. i' *r,". J'-* Ui "&mptroil« Washington, iesaCkll 14.—the comp-' hw««d|» June »troll!W-i|rtie condition of n^ti6nal.,bijta 6se of business June:#., !. ~t the cloi '•w with simple services at Bafr«liarbbr, Mei Four tl|ousaad qhrliti^ Sci^UfiM as* sembled ioi Boston, for th^ annual m»et- •..Officers of Johnstownk- Pa., saved 18,000 in cash After a running fight with robbers. :,I,V Marconi says all transatlantic steam ships will be equipped with powerful wireless plants,' Lumber receipts in Chicago during the first four months of- the year showed,2S per cent decrease. Q\v': Two men who had robbed a Chicago saloon of 810,602 were.arrested an hour Inter with the booty. Botfe. the Lake C&rrlers^ association and the masters and pilots are confident of winning the strike. 1 The Chicago Federation of Labor calls on President Roosevelt to send the reg ular troops ipto Colorado. Seal poachei'B are reaping harvest alodg Russian Islands while the coasts are unguarded by gunboats. Franz Vecsey, the boyvioliniBt, scored a triumph fit, Buckingham palace and was kissed by the queen of England. A government report says plant dis eases cost the farming interests of the country many millions pf dollars In 1903 Thirteen New York firemen were tem porarily overcome with smoke aAd fumes from a restaurant subceUar in which were stored cigars and liquor. Perdicarls, the American |ield for ran som by Raisuli.'the Morocco bandit, de clares in a letter to a London friend that^. his captor is a kindly hearted gentleman. Returns frtfm 37 states ain^ territories show that the uninstructed delegates win be in a position tc cbntrol the dem ocratic national convention at St. Louis next"mont^ President Roo's^velt, in accepting from the American Medical association a Washington statue of Dr. Benjamin Rush, dTew lessons of patriotism from, the life of the physician-statesman. Mrs Hannah Ellas, accused ,of black mailing aged John Jl. Piatt,! of New" York, tells how she refused a gift'ol $18,000^ the money subsequently being thrown on the floor, and then swept up by a house servant.' "n A Louisville court has (H*dered the ad ministrator of the Craik estate to sell the historic book case presented by George Washington to Dr. James Craik, his family physician. The Mount Ver non society has offered $1.600'for it. Women's Congress Meets. Berlin, June 14.—The international women's congress, called by the League of German Wtwaen's Societies, in con nection with the international council of women, opened Monday, morning in Philharmonic hall. There was a large attendance of women from all the con tinental countries, the United States and Australia. Frau Marie Stritt, oi Dresden, president Qf the 'Getman league, opened the congress with, an elo*' 4ueht address to Which the Qountejs of Aberdeen, president of:theinternational council, responded. ru'i- THE-MARKETS. Grain, Pxovisions, Etc. Chicago,- June IS. FLOUR—Steady. Spring wheat, special patents, *5.60 Mlnneapolisi, hard patents, *4.60(5:4.70 Minneapolis, hard spring, straight, export bags, |4.30@4.40 cie^r, f* port bags, S3.40@8.50. WHEAT—Higher. Cash, No. 2 hard 903 95c July, 86%@«7Mtc September, SlTfefSSc- CORN-Strong. Cash,No.2 ^?i@49c July, 48%@49%c September, 48%@49c, De certblr.TsksW May, 43%@43%c. OATS—StTonge-r mr» and higher Cash, No. 2 39%®40c July,'39?s@39%c September, 31%(t32%c. RYE—Dull and. quiet, still value* were lower. No. 2, 'in store, 78c nominal samp.« lots,'73c July, «7c. BARLEY—Market easy offerings were small. Screenings, S7,/fe@42c feed or mixing barley. 38@42c low-grade malting, 43®i4c fair to good, 45@48c choice, 50®56ci tancy, 58@6»c. BUTTER—Barely steady good -demand. Creameries, per lb., 12@17%c dairies, 11(8 i5c. EGGS—Market ruling easy, price® iower. Freah eggs, at mark^new cases returned, i3^@14c per dozen prime firsts, 15%c. LIVE POULTRY—Market dull and fe-el in*.weak quotations lower. Turkeys', per lb., S®10c chickens,'fcwls/10®10ftc ducks, 9618c. POTATOESrr(Nev). .Feeling steady. Arkansas Triumpha, per- bu., tl.48@l.50 Texas red, good to cXoice, $1,40@1.45. New .York. June 13. FLGUR—Quiet but steady. Minnesdta patents, 15.0005.35. WHEAT—Opened lower, but shortly- re~ acted.: July, 91®91%c September, »4%a 84%c December, 83^M|84.c. RYE—Nominal. No. 2 w6stern, 73c n-om inal. CORN—Dull and'featureless. OATS—Nominal. Live Stock.^.. .... Chicago, June 13. CATTLE—Qholce to 6.65 Texas prime beeVes, I6.S5@. gQod. to- choice heavy, steers, IS.903' 6.80* fair to good ekport and shipping •siteers, $5.45®5.85 medium beef ateers, 15^10 @5.40 inferior and plain .steers, sood to lartcy -cows and. hetters, $4.4065.30* cood to choice feeders, W-.75®4^80 P°°r fair Istockers and feeders, 32.20(33.70 fair td good cows and, h.elfers,, W.35®4.1? good "cutting and fair b^ef cows, bull*, calvespoiMiitnoii to\ftiir. »25«|4.25 ^ncy. 14 80@6.50 com-ftd) westeirn steer*, W.flOe 6.90 bulls and grass ^teers, 12.75® 5.10 fed :Te^as.steers, lair to. choice, |4.«0 *6.66, ''J HOUMhrdood tor choice heavy «hlppin* to fali"' n«*ei |4i7S®4.i»2 good to^choice. ^4.920^.00 poor -to choice pigs, $4.00®4.75. o'mfcha, Neb. June 13. ^'CAli'LE—Ma«kef. Wti*e,-:.'.st'eady-' strong. llaUve heifers, m|8 B0®6.00 canners 32.00@3.00 stockers and •feeders 3J.'00«4:Wrcalres J2.50. 6&60« buys and stags, |175@4.50. Bibbs—ka'rket shade stronger. Heiv» 14 85®4.»2Vi teheed/ ««:TOUie-l $2H tight, 94.W @4^B0 pigs. $4.00@4.«0 bulk of sales, $4.77% ©«*%. bMEEP—Mafket steady:, .Weetern year .lings, $&00^i0 withers, |5.00«5.3) 14.TC®5.25 common and stock*nr, 13.2695.10 lambs. |6.78fi7»^ mmm neW'soh«dnle of- faroaers institutes bM been repan4 for months by Supfe. Hoverstad of the state experimental 'statiom It will e&U for institutes to be held in Pelan June 7} Badger, June 8-9 Roseau, June 10 Halloek, June 21 Stepheq, June 22 Arg-yle, June 23 Warren, June 24 Ada, June 35 Halstadi June 28 Fisher, July 1 Bemidji, July 2. There will be a .number of^ prominent Minnesota agri culturists at the institutes to assist in the ork, and great benefit is expected to be derived from^hem. Among those who will take part in conducting them are ]Pro(. Kaufman of Fargo agricult ural college James A. Wilson of the pare food commission at St. Paul and Col. B. A. Wilkinson of St Paul. Mr. Hoverstad has been fortunate in secur ing the consent of these men to act as asaisstants, and he hopes to secure one or two bthers before the institutes are closed 'Vv.fb'' Burned to leath. '. "Devotion to her children cost the life of Mrs. A. L. Hauser„Minneapons. Mrs. Hauser was heating a canof var nish on her cook- stove preparatory to applying it to the floor. The fire from the stove ignited the varnish and it oe a W a Mrs. Haulier, having a mother's thought for her twoechlldren who were asleep apstairs, attempted to throw the burning can outdoors, but In doing so her. clothing took fire and soon she was a llving torch. Her cries, brought the neighbors, but before they could Smother, the fire the woman was burned so badly that noth ing could be done to save her. Killed in Elevator* Nick Reinart, was buried in a bin of screenings at Elevator !K, Twenty ninth street and Garfield avenue, Min neapolis, and his body, was not recov ered for three hours. It was thought that when he was re covered that the spark of life had not been entirely smothered, but after working over him for some minutes it was discovered that he.was dead. The accident was due to the. fact that the chute leading-from the bin was clogged up, and when Beinert entered the bin to ascertain the canse the screenings started and sucked Reinart to the bottom of the bin. He leaves a wife. Farmer's Wife Held Up. While Peter Schaust, who lives about one and a half miles north of Delano, was attending:church a masked robber entered his home and compelled Mrs. Schaust to give up wbat money was in the house. At first she refused, but he drew a revolver and fired a couple of shots, one of which just passed her head and'frightened she gave him 1 Considerable excitement has been paused at Crookston by the disappear ance of the 14-yearrold\ grandchild of Mr.: and Mrs. Edward O'Neal from their farm, a few miles from there. She has been absent' several days and nt trace of her has been found. She disappeared Saturday evening, and this following morning btiggy tracks^ were found at one corner of a pasture fence not far from the house. T,he entire neighborhood has been searched and the grandparants are dis tracted.. Arrested by HackdWvers. Through the persevering efforts of four St. Paul hackdrivers, a young man who calls himself Donald Stewart was was arrested there after along cba$e early Sunday morning. Stewart is accused of having stolen $24,000 in certificates of deposit from J. E. Hall of Duluth formerly a rail conductor. It was afterward found to be a mis take «nd Stewart was released. Suicide. Mrs.Frank DeBilson of Foley, age 28, committed suicide by taking carbolic acid because she had a little difference with her husband. About the last words she said-to him were "Kiss-me, FrAnk it will be the last time." 7 She formerly lived in Minneapolis. Her. parents reside at New Ulm, and the be taken there for burial. 'News Notes. Gov. Van Sant files ah order re moving Qreeley Carr, county attorney of Marshall county. ^dwin Ashlank, of St. jPaul, has been appointed a clerk in the depart ment of commerce. The Brainerd high school graduated the largest class in its history. Twen ty received diplomas. V, Teachers deficient in 'music and drawing are barred from St. Paul schools by new rule. y? 4 present year is the banner one in the history of new companies in corporated in the state. It is thought that seven-year-old F*ance» Fitzgerald, daughter of James ClYsgerald, of Minneapolis, hUs.been kidnapped. An 8-y"earrold girl of Perham was ^Berlbusly~woui^e2t while playing with revolver. She snapped .the. trigger, not knowing the ,weapon .was loaded, PerijyvR living. at SU10 Six teenth avenue squth,.,an .employe Of the Minneapolis pq^tqffie for the last .eight. .years, is- in ^he^u^ty: il' 6d .a.charge of robbing.the mail^. Dfforijs .are being made the offi cers members the H^nnesota State poultry Association ^to secure, the ne$t annnal ineeting of the na ioi|al association. TheMneetipg will -be held Jan. 10, 1905, at a plaoe to ne decidftd upon Uter.v imi ASOtWTB f. meet the next two */VV r, Teaehen' ^Mwociation will •paul.l '^..\ Tf-'- r- pt. Qlsen issues a. bulletin schools. teenerson is to be the next er at Crookstpn. .A "bl|!p ilndepehdenca Day celebration ii to hf held at Excelsior.. Nine bands were in the parade of Woodnlto's picnic at Mankato. Van Sant offers a reward, for tlj^'jtti^'dererH -of J. 0. Sullivan, prthern Pacific crop report jeneraily favorable conditions. Minnesota men pass the ex for a Rhodes scholarship, .jyayraen in St. .Paul knocked donrh Oljid rob John Peterson4, of Lu veihe.^, Tony' CJ. Wisch, a military prisoner, is sliot^w^ile trying to escape at Fort Snelling. .' i, The work of remodeling the old buildings at Fort Snelling is nearly completed. T)ie state buys the $450,000 worth of Certificates issued by the capitol commission. Dr. J. W. Bell, of Minneapolis, is elected president of the State Medical Association. It is'^iioped tb. dedicate the Twin City bitflding at the St. Louis fair the middletof "June. The ttate sends a carload of butter to St. ®buis to be entered in the but ter scoring ^contest. "'..fK-, June&2, fire destroyed the postofHce and cOtit^nts of Kramer's hotel and Mahlum's store at Nevis. St. F^iul is to have a German consul and itfis expected that the appoint-, ment will-be made next fall, Pres|ient Weld, of Moorhiead nor mal sc^tooi, says -Minnesota teachers are betfcer paid than ever before. Wor^ihfii begun at the agricultural experiment fetation in the new stock pavilio|| which is to cost $3^,000. The-|fe«tokston Journal 6ays that the chances are in favor of a new site being ^elected for the. public library, atids of small pike' and bass elved from the state hatchery •sited in Lake Rebecca, Del- ano. the 0 Li her so much that fell f! Minn1 thejjk the money on- hand, amounting to nearly 8300. The con stable and sheriff were at once notified (tnd am working on tbe brief descrip tion Mrs. Schaust could gite of the bobber, who they think w»s no stran ger in that vicinity. CUrl Mfappeari. L. Bacon, general agent of ha at Superior, was yesterday ed'. agent of. the road at St. Carrier W. H. Allen, of St. PaUl, i|i sentenced to'one year in the state penitentiary for pilfering let ters. ihate Bank of Richmond, hav ipital of $10,000, was aut'nor 1 begin' business by the public pr. I Menard, a four-year-old cliild, the porch of her home in jlis, breaking both legs, above fhe ing a ized ti exami Tli§ teilive Stock Sanitary Board •diiand-^kllled«'at:"SouthvSt. condiemned PaMi thirty-two Rattle affected with tuberculosis. The state 'treasurer received $58,000 from the JOhnsott-Wenthworth Com pany-' of Cloquet in payment of tim ber stumj^age., Three iron: mines, the Sibley, Savoy and. Zenith, On the Vermillion ran# at Ely, have resumed operations on a moderate scale. The fourteenth" annual convention bf the Catholic Total Abstinence So ciety of the,,Diocese of Winona was h«id in Winona. Gust Osking, a shoemaker whose resident and shop is Ideated at 206 Cedar avenue, Minneapolis, was found dead in his-bed. The village council of Pertiam has leased ten acres of the park) to the new pickling company, which is build ing a factory, here. Arne Hanson, 011 old resident of Cyrus, was bound over for maiming and disfiguring Qarl Rohde, by biting off part of- his nose, The Minnesota State Board of In vestment was. the bidder for $405,000 of certificates of indebtedness issued by the capitol commission It is probable an effort will be made to secure the convention of Minne sota State rimlsic Teachers' Associa fion for Wifiona next year. A south-bound freight train on the Rock Island left the track near Trds ky. Five-cars *and the caboose were damaged and .a woman injured. Two bf tl»»r'huge Italian marble col umns of the grand stairway corridor of the new'capitol have been received and are in place. The other columns are on their way. Elk River has won the county seat removal proceeding instituted by citir zens at Becker. Enough voters signed a remonstrant to defeat the holding of a special election. N. O. Dahl,' of Crookston, and his daughter Agot, eighteen years old', are believed to have been murdered the last paflrt of April on their claim near Quiring postolfice. Twelve cars, loaded with 172,800 boxes of strawberries, arrived in Min neapolis one day |and* retail dealers are not charging over 10 cents for box. or SS cents for three. James A MacLeod, of St. Paul, was awarded the contract .fqr, furnishing plans and specifications for the erec tion of a /new court house for iAke county to cost about' $50,66d. A spa^lc 'irot»v"a.defe^tfve Wire in1 George I^'Gilfetj^s lbibathouse at'Gid ebn's Bay, Lake XJinpetQii^a, mi.^ed in. with some, ipasol.itie in thcj ^Qtto^of his yacht "Delletimar" and both yacht anil boathouse -were totally'* lost 'in thei iexpioSion and ^tm|iiah'^n£ued.' W^iile .trying to escape the guards at the workhouse in Minneapolis, Ed ward IlanHimy aged eighteeiu jumpd into the river and was drowned near the boon*. Fire in the Tivoli saloon a^/Crook stoft, operated by Brink Sros- swept through- the building from cellar to carret. Brink Bros.' loss is $2,000. iiX wmk SAKE OLD THINO OVER, GAIN. K.m Miss Gusherly—I suppose it's very hard work to find new .ideas for your musical comedies, i• :y Ruyters Kramp—I never tried to.— Chicago- Chronicle. lame as Old Clothes. Harry, aged five, had been telling the minister that his father had Just got a new set of teeth.. "And what,"' asked the good man pa tronizingly, 'Ms he' going to d9 with his old ones?" "Oh." replied the little fellow, with a deep sigh. "I Suppose mamma will cut 'em down and make me wear. '^an." —Cincinnati Enquirer.. IKPORTAtfT OMIfSION. Ill U.1 'J JO ?TC1 "What books are those you are pack ing, Henry?" "These—It's that set of One Hundred Best Books that fool agent got me trfbuy last fall." "O yes. I looked all through them this morning for something that would give instructions on how to pack books."— Chicago Tribune. .Flint and SteeL Mrs. Highmore (with cold dignity)— To whit am I indebted for ,the honor of this visit? Unexpected Caller—To your careless servan t, perhaps, madam. I dare say she forgot that you were not at home.—Chi cago Tribune. In the Parlor. His words if love delight her, She's such a lonely. He makes her life much brighter By turning down the gas. —Philadelphia Pt-ess. A GREATER DEPTH. She—Do you remember last week, when we had a few words, I said that you were just as disagreeable as you could be, and that I hated you as much as I could hate anyone in this world? He (anticipating apology)—Yes, I re member. -She—I didn't know you then as well as I do now or 1 shouldn't have said that-^Ally Sloper.•' "This nite^probiem Is a dreadful thing." ... -v-..'. ,: "Yes," answered young Mrs. Torkins /'whenever IseeCharley get a pencil and .begin .to figure on the. entries in a nice I know there's going to be trouble."— Washington Star. Oni Hay Wish.-" l'1 l*omny—Ma, 1^wish you^gfmifle some 1 eake.. ... Mother—Tommy! Didn't I tell you not'tolisk.fb^cake?:',',, Tonlmy—r' ^in't '••VHi* Jeit .v. I' .. MMjmm The One Thing fN^edful. "What do you think, of those song» 8 without words?" asked the fair maid W she a,rose from the piano. .. -41 "With a' little, alteration they wonld", be d.ivine," replied her. batehelor rela^., f*!' 'How co&ld they be imprbved?" asked.. l-al 'By omitting the music aiso,'* he an-' swered.—Cincinnati Enquirer. The Hand of Time. Mother—Why, my dear, what's the matter? Daughter (tearfully)—I—J am losing my beauty. "Nonsense!" "Oh, it's true. I went to Bargain A Co.'s to price goods, and the clerk whe waited on me began to look tired before I'd been there an hour—boo, hoo. hoo!" —N. Y. Weekly. HATTER 07 OPINION. "Say, waiter, how do .you pronounce^ C-a-m-e-m-b-e-r-t cheese?" "It is largely a personal matter, sir. A gentleman who was ^n here last night pronounced it the worst he ever saw."— Chicago Tribune. Solid Comfort. Don't keer how de woirl' P— Never want it all: Ef yoiii never rise fur. Won't have fur ter fall. —Atlanta Constitution. The Last Word. Church—I took my wifei home phono graph. Gotham—And did It pieape her? "It did at first but she finally broke, it into bits." "You surprise me!" "Well, yon see. that was the only war she could get the last word."—Yonkers Statesman. ^, Chef of bon vivant, who is about to give a dinner—The composition of the menu presents serious difficulties, sir. ,We couldn't get credit for anything ex cept a basket of vegetables, eight her ring, two boxes of caviar and a pineap ple.—Fliegende Blaetter. Says the Young Father. Is sleeplessness (contagious? Why. There's ho disease to match it! Whenever baby gets It, I Am always sure to catch It. —Philadelphia Ledger. Commendation. "Do you consider Buskin a great ac tor?" "No,", answered Mr. Stormington Barnes. "He speaks very admiringly ot your. performance." "Buskin is not a good actor, but he is a remarkably fine critic."—Washington Star. A Lovely fepot. One of the loveliest spots I think My vision ever saw, Was when I wished an ace, to fill, And got it in the draw. —Tonkers Statesman. .., Why He Lost Out. "Darling," he said, "your many, 1 charms intoxicate me." "That settles It," replied the practical? ', maid "I'll never marry you." 'Why E fj Va v* not, dearest f" he asked. .. *j "Because," she replied^ "if what yon=,y say Is true you'd be drunk all the time." —Chicago Daily News. "Mildred, what brings that young... ^3 man to"'the "house no often?" .: "Well, his mother's^t#|i^athdr. mar ried a second ^usl# greatv aunt. We're trying W^jpptre out what.' relation that makes nijn to me, and 1 that can't be done in- orifi evening^"—' Tit-Bits. v.- %, v-itT* Anlhquiry. He-r-I,don't see why you h6uldn*t believe that you're the only ^rl ev#fe She—Why did all the othiw glrls bn?*' lieve it?«rJudxe. KM) & •m