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New York dispatch. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1863-1899, February 12, 1871, Image 6

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[Original.]
BROTHERLY LOVE.
By C*
Oh I what is love? if not the tie
That binds us each to other—
Of Faith, and Hope, and Chanty,
Endearing every “brother.”
The “sightless” iaith, that mystic cord,
Which man, unless a scorn er,
Doth now and ever finds within
“ The Church around the corner.
Then Hope, sublime “fruition” given
To cast its spell about us,
With bright refulgence sheds its ray,
A saintly, cherished number „ .
J?oiD!s heavenward, where “the faithful stand,
And speaks to every mourner:
’•There’s comfort to the weary ” in
“ The Churoli around the corner.”
And last, not least, yet “ greatest ” gift,
“ Beyond the grave extending,”
Comes Christ, twin-born of Love,
A virtue never ending—
•• The high, the low, the rich, the poor,
And every sad forloner,
Hears, “Blessed are the dead ” within
“ The Church around the corner.”
Blest triune fruitlet 1 may they bear
To each and every “ brother ”
On this, Columbia’s favored strand,
And reach to every other,
A loving, helping hand, “in deed,”
And in His words adorn her:
•• Thrice blessed are tho faithful,” in
The Church around the corner.”
[Original.]
A VERY LATE WALK.
BY TO a BRttWH.
Flo Mabury placed a loaf of cake in the oven,
as Bridget opened the kitchen door and whis
pered loudly:
“The widower wid the top of his head on
his chin is in the parlor awaitin’.ye, Miss Flo.”
“ O dear I How long do you suppose he’ll
stay?” exclaimed Mrs. -Mabury, who sat ata
table picking over currants.
“Can’t say, really,” responded Flo, wiping a
spot of flour from her chin, and hastily unty
ing her apron. “ Shouldn’t wonder if he had
brought bis pipe and meant to spend the day,”
eho added, with a mischievous twinkle in her
eyes, catching a good-sized piece of citron
from her mother’s lap, and disappearing
through the door, though not in time to es
cape Mrs. Mabury’s parting injunction :
“Be sure and don’t let him stay long, and
Just run out and keep track of your cake, for
neither of us can watch it.”
Flo ran into her mother’s room, it having
the largest mirror in the house, and pulling
open her bureau door, borrowed a fresh collar,
a bright bow, and a clean handkerchief; then
brushing the flour from one long curl and tak
ing another bite of citron, she trippled along
to the parlor, smoothing her pink calico dress,
and wondering what could have brought a gen
tleman caller on Saturday morning, when all
the town was baking.
She stepped softly through the open parlor
door—so softly that the gentleman standing
. before her portrait did not hear her. In an
instant she had stolen up to him, and, with a
merry laugh, put a piece of citron into one of
hie hands.
“Oh, you witch!” he exclaimed, turning
quickly; “you’re too mischievous! Your mo
ther should put you in a convent, or—marry
you to some old sobersides like me ; some one
who would volunteer to keep you straight.”
“ Indeed! and- which would you advise her to
do?” inquired Flo, with twinkling eyes.
“W-e-1-1, I reckon the best thing is to give
you to me,” and Mr. Crane stroked his red
mustache and gazed benignly down upon the
little girl, as she seemed to him.
At that moment Flo discovered one of his
great feet nervously kicking the table leg. She
felt her mouth begin to twitch, and -the effort
to repress a burst of laughter caused her to
blnsh. Instantly the blush was misinter
preted.
“Miss Flo,” murmured a now tremulous
voice, “ I think I could make you very happy.
The children love you dearly. Tell me if you
will bo my wife and their mother.”
“ Mr. Crane,” exclaimed Flo, flashing both
blue eyes full upon him, “ are you crazy ?”
“ No. Why do you ask ? Is it, then,' so dis
tasteful for you to think of being a mother to
my five little ones ? Have I, then, been so de
ceived ?” and he gazed imploringly into her
face. “Say that you lo that you do not
ha that you will, at least, try to think
ki——that—that ”
“ Why, Mr. Crane, you amaze me. I can’t
believe that you really want to marry me; I’m
good for nothing—positively nothing—but to
play the piano, read novels, and make cake. I
can’t sew—or, rather, I won't. I always shirk
work when I can, and get all the pleasure out
of life ; and I have a very vicious disposition.
Now, don’t deliberately throw yourself away on
such a girl. You would be terribly taken in if
you married me.”
“ Don’t believe a word of it; girls never tell
the truth,” muttered the old gentleman, feel
ing of his bald head, with a bewildered expres
sion.
“ Thon,” continued Flo, tying knots in her
handkerchief and blushing slightly, “I should
torment you nearly to death by flirting with
other gentlemen. I know I should—l couldn’t
help it. And I should whip the children and
feed them on hoe-cakes and hasty-pudding,
whenever your back was turned. Oh ! you
would love me enough to eat me up the first
month, but by the second you’d be lamenting
that you hadn’t done it.”
“Enough, enough,” cried the gentleman,
flushing. “ I don’t believe a word of it, and I
love you still, Miss Flo. lam past my youth;
these auburn locks,” and he smoothed a mass
of decidedly red hair, “are freely sprinkled
with gray ; but this heart is as young and true
to-day, Mies Flo, as when I roamed, a happy
youth, over ”
“Ochl Miss Flo, an’ your mither siz be
afther cummin quicker to the kitchen, to tind
your cake,” burst forth Bridget at the door.
Up sprang the young lady, and, excusing
herself, escaped to the kitchen, where she
•’tinded” and laughed merrily over tho turn
affairs had taken.
Returning a few moments later, she found
Mr. Crane walking the floor with arms folded
a la Napoleon.
“My child,” and he stopped short before
her, “you love another. That is why you
treat my offer in so frivolous a manner. I
think I know who it is. Do not answer me to
day ; I will call to-morrow, and you shall have
time to choose between us. Adieu; we part to
meet again.” And catching his hat from the
floor, he was gone before she could reply.
Flo watched him through the closed blinds,
While she twisted her long curls, and thoughts
something like these floated through her brain,
.“He is rich, and he loves me. I don’t be
lieve Harry Dean cares for me, or ever will.
My love for him is thrown away. Why not
marry this old coot at once, and try and be
happy. I wonder if he is really good. If I
was certain of it I wouldn’t hesitate. How can
I ascertain? I will think.” And a hard ex
pression settled about the rosy lips, and a sad
one in the blue eyes.
******
As Flo Mabury returned, late that evening
from a dance with a gentleman escort, she
passed Mr. Crane beneath a lamp-light. Both
bowed and passed on. Taking leave of her
friend Mr. Gilliss, she closed the front door,
and stood at a window near, gazing dreamily
into the street. She watched him pass under
a lamp, and disappear in the darkness, and an
instant later the form of Mr. Crane followed,
with a stealthy step. Instantly fired with cari
osity, she caught a water-proof cloak from the
hat-rack, wrapped it about her, the hood drawn
well over her head, and opening the door, stole
softly out, and followed the two gentlemen.
“Can it be Mr. Crane?” she asked herself.
“If so, his jealousy is prompting him to try
and discover who my escort is. I will keep be
hind both, and watch performances.”
On went Mr. Gillis, whistling “Annie Lau
rie,” and occasionally striking his cane against
the ringing pavement.
Next came Mr. Crane, walking more on his
toes than ever before in his life, his coat collar
turned up and his hat pulled down; and last
of all, Flo brought up the rear, shivering
slightly at her new and unprotected condition,
but full of merriment, curiosity, and an over
powering love of adventure.
“What will happen?” she thought, and
pressed one hand over her wildly beating
heart. “ What would mama say ?” and just
then she saw a poorly dressed woman stop Mr.
Gillis beneath a lamp, and hold out one hand,
ns if for money. He handed something, and
passed on, while she remained beneath the
lamp.
“In a moment Mr. Crane’s turn will come,”
thought Flo, as she quickened her pace.
As he neared the lamp the woman stepped
out, and with a piteous face, begged for money.
Flo stood still and listened, not six yards off.
“Let’s see your face, sis,” replied he.
“ Turn to the light,” and he rudely whirled her
about. “What a homely beggar!” he ex
claimed. “Get out of my way 1” and turning
her, gave her a push. At that moment his
eyes fell upon Flo.
“Here, sissy,” he cried, “let’s see if you're
fit to look at.”
Terror stricken at the thought of discovery,
find at learning the true character of the man,
Flo ran without knowing whither. On came
Mr. Crane, making a low groaning sound to
frighten her.
Bhe saw a man coming toward her, and with
a cry she flew lorward, and catching him by the
arm, crying, “Oh, save me! save me!” clung
trembling and nearly fainting to him in the
darkness.
It never occurred to her that he might bo no
better than the one she was fleeing from.
Her protector saw the approaching man,
and comprehended the situation at once.
“My child,” ho said, “take my arm, and I
will see you homo.”
The voice was Harry Dean’s.
Just then Mr. Crane arrived, and laying a
rough hand upon her shoulder, said:
“ This is my servant-girl. She has stolen
my silver spoons, and I’ve been chasing her
for three blocks. I demand her in tho name
Of the law.”
“Oh, sir,” began Flo, who had regained
some courage since discovering the name of
her protector, “ take me to the light across the
treet and X will satisfy this man.®
Her voice was too weak from fright to be
recognized by either gentlemen. Across they
went, and when under the full blaze Flo threw
back her hood.
Mr. Crane gave one bewildered stare, and,
with a howl of rage, started off on a run. Then
Flo explained affairs.
Harry informed her that he really supposed
she was going to marry that fellow; and if her
affections wore not enlisted for him, as he had
reason to doubt, might he presume tq offer
himself to take charge of her henceforth.
She asserts that she never regreted her late
walk. j,
TAKING inE KINKS OUT.
One afternoon, two or three weeks ago, a
chap who sported a gold watch and chain, and
any quantity of mustache, was seen to put
down a dry goods box at the corner of Main
and First streets, in Dubuque* lowa. He did
it with such an air'of dignity and business that
everybody wondered what his object was, in
consequence of which a large crowd assem
bled. Among others surrounding this new
found centre of interest were a number of ne
groes, who are ever willing to be on hand on
such occasions.
He of the’mustacbo and chain mounted the
box, and immediately produced from a satchel
a number of bottles, which contained a pecu
liar looking fluid- This, he said, was gotten up
by a philanthropist, whose only object was to
enhance the happiness of the African race.
Tho bringing of this invention to perfection
was a mammoth work of intellect, and had re
quired the patient study of years. This great
boon was bestowed for the trifling price of one
dollar per bottle, and was nothing more nor
less tban<an article to take the kinks out of a
‘ ‘ n igger’s” w 001.
This -announcement,was received with evi
dent manifestations of 'delight by the colored
people present. The young mokes, who, many
a time and oft, had mentally denounced Mr.
Ham for having been so rash as to incur the
displeasure of his aged sire, in consequence of
which their heads were covered with tuits of
wool, invested liberally in the vender’s bottles,
and before an hour had elapsed no less than
sixty bottles wore 'disposed of. Before the
mind’s eye of the purchasers arose visions of
luxuriant heads of-hair—hair that was to make
captives of the hearts of the ebony Dinahs,
and which would outvie-in beauty the blackest
diamond.
The seller of thisdncomparable stuff having
disposed of as much as he could, “picked up
his traps” and left for Chicago.
Now comes the sad part of the story. The
purchasers assembled .together and resolved to
try the effects of one of the bottles on the head
of a diminutive specimen of a moke, whose loss,
should the kink be cieath-deahng, would not
create much of a gap in the community Afri
can. So the appiicijtion was made, and on
Friday morning an-inquisitive Caucasian went
to the residence of the youth operated on, to
take a note of effects.
He rapped at the door, and it was opened by
the sable and diminutive specimen he was in
quest of.
But what a sight met his gaze! As the ne
groes say, tho child was entirely “ barefooted
on the top-of his head.” There wasn’t even a
single thread of wool left to indicate that little
black patch of flesh and bone had ever been a
soil adapted to the growth of curls not exactly
Hyperion. Not only that, but the flesh was
decorated -with little red spots here and there,
which clearly proved that tho medicine not
only took out the wool, but had a tendency to.
convert a sable individual's skin to the color of
that of Indians.
THE VAGARIES OF~ LOVE.
A HAKRira WOMAN ELOPES WITH
A BOY.
(From the Cincinnati Gazette, Jan. 25J
Day before yesterday, at about four o’clock,
a buggy was driven to the door of the Hamel
House, southwest corner of Ninth and Syca
more streets, and two persons alighted, a
woman and a boy. Tho woman was Lucy
Thompson, tho wife of Clayton Thompson, who
lives near Socialville, Warren county, and the
boy was James Bates, aged sixteen, who has
for sometime been living on Thompson’s farm.
The proprietor of the Hamel House, Mr. Wy
coff, formerly lived in Socialville, and knew tho
Thompson family. They told him that they
wore' on the way to Fort Scott, Kan., and in
quired the road they should take. Being.in
formed the Ohio and Mississippi, they went to
the depot and bought the tickets, and returned
for supper. Presently the hostler of the hotel
came m and told Mr. Wyckoff that a man was
in the stable who claimed the horse and bug
gy as stolen property. On going to the stable,
Mr. Wyckoff found there Mr. Clayton Thomp
son. He inquired for his wife, and after prom
ising that he would do no personal violence to
either her or the boy, ho was led to the parlor
and rushed, without warning, into the pres
ence of the guilty pair. Upon seeing her, he
broke out with the exclamation:
“ My God 1 Lucy, is this so ?”
She replied:
“Yes, it is so. I married you because my
friends wanted me to. I never loved you, and
I like James here, and I am never going to live
with you again.”
The three then sat down in the parlor, and a
conversation ensued, which lasted until mid
night, in which, however, the boy took little
part, except to protest, now and then, that
“ she did it all.” Mrs. Thompson acknowledg
ed that during their married hie of nine years
her husband had always treated her well, and
been a good husband to her. She persisted,
however, that she did not love him, and would
not again live with him, and she clung to the
lad with a singular tenacity. They finally sep
arated for the night, going to separate rooms.
In the morning the conversation was renewed,
and Mrs. Thompson finally consented to re
turn homo with her husband, stipulating, how
ever, that the boy Bates should be allowed to
return with them. Thompson consented that
he should go back and stay until March, but
he asseverated with a groat oath that longer
than March ho should not stay.
And so the two departed for their home
again, but the last thing Mrs. Thompson was
heard to say to her husband was, “If you
know all, you wouldn’t ask me to go back with
you.”
MATRIMONIAL ROMANCE.
ASTONISHING A SISTER AND A
BEAU. ‘
The morning Quincy and Carthage train
brought to the city of Quincy, 111., among other
persons desirous of attending the lecture of
Mr. John B. Gough, two ladies and a gentle
.man from Mendon. One of these ladies was a
widow, the other a younger sister and the re
puted sweetheart of the gentleman who escort
ed the twain to the city. It is immaterial at
what hotel they put up, or tho names by which
they registered—though we have both in our
note-book.
Soon after arriving in the city the young
gentleman proceeded to the bookstore of T. D.
Woodruff, and obtained seats lor the ladies and
himself. While upon this mission the ladies
took a stroll around the city, and quite acci
dentally met a Quincy gentleman, a mutual
friend, who was also known to be an ardent
admirer of the young ladies.
To understand the position of things thor
oughly we must state that the family of the
Quincy gentleman and the family of the Men
don lady were each violently opposed to the
young people “keeping company,” and the
elder sister feeling it to be her dutv, at once
tried to get rid of the boy. But fortunately
(or unfortunately) something was said which
aroused her suspicions, and, turning to her
sister, she demanded what was meant. Where
upon the young lady, without further ado, at
onoe confessed that “she and George were
married last Fall, and that they had kept it a
secret because they wished to avoid trouble 1”
Here was a “settler,” and to add to the con
sternation of all, the Mendon beau chanced to
come along. He was at once made cognizant
of the facts, nor was he long in deciding what
lie should do, for off he started for the depot,
and jumping upon the tram, which was just
ready, he left for the rural shades of Mendon
and the unhappy family of the bride. The
elder sister followed, but not reaching the train
in season, returned to the hotel.
The bride and groom were thus left alone,
but the latter, fearing his mother would hear
of his “happy ” condition, hired a team and
started for the house of a friend, four miles in
the country, where he hopes to remain till the
gale is over.
We saw tho landlord of the hotel at which
this affair occurred, late last evening, who in
forms us the young gent’s mother did call to
inquire into the facts of tho case, and went
away in high dudgeon at the result of her in
vestigation. The parties were married at or
near Keokuk, during the State Fair there last
Fall, and but for Gough’s lecture bringing the
bride to the city, there is no telling when the
denouement would have occurred, or what the
consequent result. The husband of the lady
has been content during the past three or four
months to visit his bride once or twice a week,
as her beau, at Mendon.
DIFFERENCE IN PISTOLS.
A DISAGREEMENT ON ICE.
An amusing story of the contradiction of the
old adage, “ United we stand, divided we fall,”
comes to us from up the Hudson river.
During the late rain and thaw, at a place not
far from West Point, a little crowd might have
been seen gathered one evening to witness the
passage across of any person who should dare
to attempt to do so on the ice. The thaw and
rains had so weakened the frozen bridge that
it seemed doubtful whether it was longer safe,
and the water and slush which covered the ice
hid from view tho dangerous air holes and
Weak spots.
Although several wished to cross, none
would attempt the passage, till at length a
gentleman camo down to the river’s edge and
announced his intention of making the attempt.
Purchasing from a boatman a good boathook,
which ho could use as a pole to j ump danger
ous places, and as a support should he go
through, he made ready to start. Then a
German peddler* with & pact weighing per
NEW YORK DISPATCH.
haps one hundred pounds on his back, said he
would go, too, and in spite of the advice 01 the
crowd, who knew the ice would not support
two men together at one spot, attempted to
walk over with the adventurous one first men
tioned. The gentleman in vain protested
against his doing so, but the peddler said :
“My tear, i will go mit you, and den if I
gets in yoa can pyjl jxjc out mit that stick.”
Finding it impossible £b persuade him to de
sist, the gentleman sprang to the ice and at
tempted to get such a start as to prevent his
“ old man of the sea” from at least being by
his side; but to no avail, for the peddler was
with him in all his turnings. At last, being
fearful for his own safety, the gentleman drew
a pistol, and pointing it at the peddler, pro
claimed his determination of blowing out his
brains if he persisted in keeping so close to
him. -
Acting under this gentle persuasion, the fol
lower kept back at a safe distance, but on
reaching the other side, immediately sought a
justice, and before the train could arrive that
was to bear the gentleman away, the grasp of
a constable was on his shoulder, and he was
charged with pointing, with intent to kill, &c.,
&c., a revolver at the head of one Hans Didem
dorff. A trip was made to the justice, and the
gentleman submitted to be searched, and
there, truly enough, was discovered the pis-;
tol; but, unfortunately for Hans, it was found
to be made of pottery, and to be of the kind
known as a pocket pistol, and on withdrawing
a cork from its mouth, very good es
caped therefrom and vanished down the feKroat
of the justice. The gentleman now proposes
to prosecute Hans for swearing that his pocket
pistol was a revolver, and is willing himself to
make affidavit that, in no sense is it or himself
in the habit of revolving. Hans had to pay
costs, and says he now wants to go fight mit
Fritz.
TRAIN UP A~CniLD, AND
AWAY HE GOES.
BY CARL BYNG (MARR TWAIN).
“ Yes, I’vo had a good many fights in my
time,” said old John Parky, tenderly manipu
lating his dismantled rose, “and it’s kind of
queer, too, for when I was a boy, the old man
was telling me better. He was a good man,
and hated fighting. When I would come home
with my nose bleeding or my face scratched
up, he used to call me out in the woodshed,
and, in a sorrowful and discouraged way, say :
‘ So, Johnny, you’ve had another flight, hey ?
How many times have I got to tell ye how dis
graceful and wicked it is for boys to fight ? It
was only yesterday that I talked to you an hour
about the sin of fighting, and here you’ve been
at it again. Who was it with this time ? With
Tommy Kelly, hey ? Don’t you know any bet
ter than to fight a boy that weighs twenty
pounds more than you do, beside being two
years older ? Ain’t ye got a spark of sense
about ye ? I can see plainly that you are de
termined to break your poor father’s heart by
your reckless conduct. What ails your finger ?
Tommy bit it 1 Drat the little fool 1 Didn’t
ye know enough to keep your finger out of his
mouth ? Was trying to jerk his cheek off,
hey ? Won’t ye never learn to quit foolin’
’round a boy’s mouth with yer fingers ? You’re
bound to disgrace us all by such wretched be
havior. You’re determined never to he no
body 1 Did you ever hear of Isaac Watts—
that wrote “Let dogs delight to bark and bite”
—sticking his fingers in a boy’s mouth to get
’em bit, like a fool ? I’m clean discouraged
with ye. Why didn’t ye go for his nose, the
way Jonathan Edwards, and George Washing
ton, and Dan’l Webster used to, when they
was boys! Couldn’t,’cause he had ye down!
That’s a purty story to tell me. It does beat
all that you can’t learn how Socrates and Wil
liam Penn used to gouge when they was under,
after the hours and hours I’ve spent telling
you about those great men 1 It seems to me,
sometimes, as if I should have to give you up
in despair. It’s an awful trial to me to have a
hoy that don’t pay any attention to good exam
ple, nor to what I say. What 1 you pulled out
three or four handfuls of his hair 1 H-m 1
Did he squirm any ? Now, if you’d a give him
one or two in the eye—but, as I’ve told you,
many a time, fighting is po.or
you—tor your father’s sake— won’t
to try and remember that 1
how did it—ahem—which licked 1 4K
him I Sho 1 Beally ? Well, now,
idea you could lick that Tommy Kelly 1 I
don’t believe John Bunyan, at ten years old,
could have done it. Johnny, my boy, you can’t
think how I hate to have you fighting every
day or two. I wouldn’t have had him lick you
for five—no, not for ten dollars. Now, sonny,
go right in and wash up, and tell yer mother
to put a rag on yer finger. And, Johnny, don’t
let me hear of your fighting again 1’
“I never see anybody so down on fighting as
the old man was; but, somehow, he never
could break me from it.”—[BujjciZo Express.
ENOCH ARDEN AGAIN.
Another Soldier u. Turns Upii to Blast
the Happiness of an Indian Dllllcoddy.
(From the New Albany (III.) Ledger).
When are we to have done with the everlast
ing “Enoch Arden?” Ho does duty in every
State in the Union, and wo doubt not Utah
could furnish many Enoch Arden stories, if
there were only a few enterprising newspaper
reporters and interviewers sent out there to
set up the jobs. The last Enoch Arden we
have had in Indiana figured at Leavenworth,
in the county of Crawford. His name is North,
however, and, as the story goes, resided in
Ohio, near the Indiana line, when tho cruel
war broke out. Feeling called upon to re
spond to his country’s call, he bade farewell to
his lovely wife and two more lovely children,
and went to Washington with a knapsack on
his back to defend his country. He passed
through many battles, Bull Run among the
number, writing graphic descriptions of his
exploits in each to his faithful wile. Finally
he ceased to write, ana after a time Mrs. North
received a letter from a member of the com
pany stating that her husband must have been
killed, as nothing bad been heard or seen of
him for some time. Everything confirmed her
in the belief that her husband was among the
lost, and like a true woman sho mourned his
death.
Five years ago she nfoved to Crawford county
with her two children, and took up her resi
dence with a relative residing about fifteen
miles distance from Leavenworth. Here she
made the acquaintance of a farmer named
Vanhoser, whom she married after a.short
courtship, and with whom sho continued to
live during the past five years periectly happy,
three children being result of their marriage.
But suddenly a cloud descended over the house
of Vanhoser. North, the first husband, ap
peared on the scene and claimed his wife. He
stated that he had been wounded and captured
in one of tho battles about Washington, and
afer a long siege of suffering and confinement,
made his escape and wrote to his wife. The
letter was returned to him through the dead
letter office, and every effort to ascertain her
whereabouts had fallen, until he reached Craw
ford county.
As may be supposed, Vanhoser was greatly
exercised at this sudden interruption of his
domestic felicity, and flatly refused to give up
his wife. This enraged North, and lie drove
Vanhoser from the premises. The latter had
a warrant taken out for the arrest of North, but
he left for Ohio, and she informed Vanhoser
that she was going. This was a damper on
poor Vanhoser, who wept, begged and plead
for his wife to remain, but she was determined
to go. The only alternative was divorce, and
suit to secure this was brought in the Com
mon Pleas Court at Leavenworth this term,
but the proof being insufficient to the mar
riage of the woman to North, tho matter re
mains unsettled. Mrs. North, was still under
the roof of her second husband at last ac
counts.
A DOG’S REVENGE.
Terrific Conflict With a Mastiff—A Fight
for Life or Death—A Heroic Woman.
Mr. Timerman, of Greene County, N. Y.,
was recently the owner of a mastiff, which ho
had raised, and which was about two years old,
and, no doubt, the largest dog in the county.
Ono afternoon recently, Mrs. Timerman and'a
lady neighbor, named Mrs:‘Eliza Huff, return
ing home from a visit to Catskill, found the
dog occupying the gate, and would not lot them
pass.
Mrs. Timerman ordered him away, but the
mastiff would not obey until they had thrown
several stones at him, when he took refuge
under thejkitchen. A short time after, Mrs.
Huff, while assisting Mrs. Timermau in carry
ing some things from the house to the kitchen,
saw the dog, with stealthy stops and glaring
eyes, advancing slowly towaid her. Bbo, see
ing she could not stop the dog by words or
gesture, at once prepared to defend herself, as
flight was impossible. As soon as tlie dog was
near her, he arose on his hind feet and at
tempted to seize Mrs. Huff by the throat.
Then ensued a combat between the woman
and dog of about ten minutes’ duration, and
which for its fierceness scarcely has a parallel
in such encounters. Mrs. Huff first threw out
her leit arm, which the dog bit fearfully near
the wrist, and with her right hand caught the
infuriated brute by the throat, and as soon as
her left hand was released from the grip of
tho dog ehe seized his under jaw with it.
Knowing from every circumstance that this
combat would be a lengthy one, as soon as tho
first excitement had subsided, Mrs. Huff or
dered the family to close every door but one,
toward which she gradually but slowly drew
the dog. Before reaching the steps in front of
the open door, the dog had for a short time
partially disengaged himself, and bit Mrs.
Huff severely on the left thigh. Finally she
had reached the doorsteps, and began to
walk up them backward, and when at the top,
she, by summoning all her strength, and by
one violent effort, threw the dog to the ground
on bis back. Before the animal could recover
his feet and ascend the steps, Mrs. Huff had
entered the house and closed tho door, and at
once fainted. Her wounds Were examined and
dressed by a skillful physician, who pronounced
her case almost hopeless. Her face, arms,
and limbs, a few hours after had swollen to
double their natural size, the poison from tho
bite having a in a few hours diffused itself
throughout her whole bods. ,
MARKED FOR THE KNIFE.
AN EXCITING- SKETCH.
About two years before the startling revela
tions respecting the dissecting trade in Edin
burgh had placed tho legal supply of “sub
jects” upon its -present satisfactory footing,
there occurred to iny elder brother, at that
time a delicate boy of about fourteen, a singu
lar adventure, involving such a shock to his
nerves as, the doctors believed, very much hp
tened his death, which occurred in less tlr
year after it. a
We then resided in a large house, w .
of poplar trees in front, close to or ' * "
nals. Within a stone’s throw of £ ™
was a lock and a lock-house t 4 thon Vlbwed
m the London Erection e of tho lo est
and most solitary levels te g* t with in e the
United Kingdom. .y
The canal at a poi” j about seventy yards
front the lock make d & giigtt deflection. The
consequence is t,at neither lock nor our house
is visible from, the long, straight level that fol
lows, and w j s closely fenced between tall
hedges ar.d old trees.
My brother had been ordered walking exer
cise, afid my father generally appointed the
path beside the level I have described for bis
walk. The traffjc, never very active, was, at
that time, in a state little better than extinct.
Not more than three or four boats passed in a
day. and chiefly owing to its perfect quietude,
it had been chosen for the walk of our solitary
invalid.
It was now Summer, and the hour of his
daily walk was from five to seven ; the earlier
hours of the afternoon being pronounced too
hot for exercise.
On the evening in question he set out alone.
His usual walk was to a point two miles up the
level, whore there was a stone block, on which
he used to sit and rest a little before setting
out for home.
While ho was taking his ease on this stone
bench, and listlessly looldng up and down the
long and deserted reach of water, there
emerged, a few hundred yards to his left, from
a sequestered path, a singular figure, which
approached slowly, and passed him by, with
only the narrow tow-path between them. It
was moving in the direction of our home, and
was that of an emaciated man, with a com
plexion dark as very old box-wood, limping,
as it seemed, painfully, very much stooped,
and with a big angular hump upon his back.
His hair was long and sooty black ; he had
prominent dark eyes, under thick black brows,
and his face and chin were stubbled with a
week’s growth of beard. He was leaning heavi
ly on a tong stick, and walked along with a
kind of hitch, whieli resembled a spasm, and
gave one the idea that each step was accom
panied by a separate sting of pain.
The face of this man expressed extreme
weakness and suffering, and might almost be
that of a man dragging himself away with a
mortal wound, to some spot where he might
lie down and die in quiet.
He had a long and heavy bottle-green coat,
which had grown to be, indeed, a coat of many
colors; for over the threadbare and greasy
ground it was overlaid, with fantastic and ex
traordinary industry, with a tessalation of
patches of patches of every imaginable color,
in which yellow, and red, and blue, and black
were discernible under a varnish of grease, and
toned with a variety of dirt; and even these
patches were patched again, and had broken
here and there into rents and fissures, and
bunches of shreds and tatters. Around his
body was buckled a broad discolored leathern
strap, and he wore a wide-leafed felt hat, with
a rather conical crown, brown and grimed by
time and ill-treatment.
This figure, with long gaiters of rabbit-skin,
and shapeloss “brogues,” Ijmped past my
brother without taking the slightest notice of
him; and uttering now and then a short groan,
as if of suppressed pain, he excited the won
der, and, in some degree, the compassion of
the boy.
He watched the progress of this man, who
was moving with great difficulty and with many
halts, in the direction oi our home. It was not
until he had got on nearly a quarter of a mile
that my brother got up, now-quite rested, to
follow in the same direction.
As this strange, crooked man with tho stick
got on, he appeared to grow more and more
exhausted, and at length he tottered into a lit
tle recess at the edge of the path, and fell help
lessly on his side among the bushes.
The boy quickened his pace, and as he ap
proached the spot he passed the head of a nar
row lane, in which he saw a donkey and cart
standing. The cart had in it, upon some
straw, a piece of old carpet, from under which
emerged some folds of coarse canvas, like a
part of an old sack ; but he could not see any
one in charge of this conveyance, though, be
ing anxious to obtain help, he called repeat
edly.
Despairing of succor, he went on, and
reached the point where he had seen the man
fall. Hero he found him. He had crept a lit
tle further in among the bushes. He was sup
porting himself feebly on the ground, upon his
elbow, bis eyes turned up as if he were on the
point of swooning, and he moaned faintly.
Tho boy’s courage almost failed him; but
the sick man seemed to perceive him, turned
his eyes upon him imploringly, and, extending
his hand toward him, so evidently signaled
for aid, that my brother could not help draw
ing near.
The fainting man then told him, in a whis
per, that if he would take his hand, and draw
him gently toward him, he would, perhaps,
be able to turn himself a little, to his great
relief.
My brother did give him his hand; accord
ingly, and the fainting man, instead of taking
it, seized his arm above the elbow, with a
gigantic hand, m a gripe like a vice, and jerk
ing him under, sprang over him, so as to
pinion him fast, lie had carried m his hand
the end of the belt which he had removed
from around his own body while waiting for his
prey, and with a dexterity acquired, no doubt,
by long practice, in a moment, with the now
hand, he drew it around the boy’s
arms and body at a single jerk, with a pressure
so powerful that he could scarcely breathe,
much less disengage his arms.
In another moment, with his knee on the
boy’s chest, and one broad hand placed right
across his mouth, so as to stifle his screams
effectually, he hitched round what had seemed
to be his hump, but what proved to be, in fact,
a bundle, from which, with the other hand he
took out, with the quickness and neatness of a
skilled manipulator, two things : one a sort of
cushion about eight inches square, covered with
chamois-leather—l have that horrible relic, no
doubt intended to aid in the process of suffoca
tion, still mmy possession; tue other was the
renowned pitch-plaster.
My brother had no idea what he intended,
for the disclosure in Edinburgh had not yet
enlightened and terrified people of all ages
throughout England.
The miscreant kept his face close to his vic
tim’s, with his powerful eyes fixed on his. His
dark, lean features and long beak, and the
thick hair that hung forward like a sooty plum
age round them, and the long sinewy neck that
arched over my poor brother as he lay at his
assarlant’s mercy, gave him, in tho fascinated
gaze of the boy, the appearance of a monstrous
bird of prey.
I dare say this ghoul had an actual power,
such as many men are said to possess, of con
trolling the springs of action, mental and bodi
ly, by some occult power of the eye. To my
brother it seemed that it needed a perpetual
and desperate struggle of will to prevent a
irighttul trance from stealing over him.
For a moment the wretch’s hand was slightly
raised from the boy’s mouth. He intended, no
doubt, at this instant to introduce the pitch
plaster, which was to stop nis mouth and nos
trils. But my brother, now struggling franti
cally, uttered two piercing yells, which com
pelled the murderer to replace his hand before
he had accomplished his purpose. Ho was
evidently now transported with fury. Up to
this he had been operating as methodically as
as a spider. He looked so fiendish that my
brother fancied he would cut his throat or otii
wiso dispatch him at the moment.
His plans, however, were different. He had
no idea of losing sight of his interests, much
less of his safety. Nd principle of his nefarious
trade was better established than the absolute
necessity of leaving no trace of actual violence
upon the person of his victims. Even the knee
with which he heid his prey was padded so
carefully that this young boy’s breast did not
exhibit the slightest contusion, although so
tong under a pressure which held him at the
verge of suffocation.
Rapidly, and with more success, the villain
again essayed his final sleight. One dreadful
yell escaped, and tho deadly pitch-plaster was
fixed on mouth and nose, and another sound
or respiration became impossible.
Tho leafy tushes above and about him, the
figure, the face of the spectre, began to swim
before ins eyes. He saw the man, still on his
knees, rise with a start and pause, with eyes
askant, and his dark hand .to his ear. In the
next instant he had disappeared.
In bis struggle the boy now rolled from the
lair in which he had been attacked into the
clear light upon the open path, where he lay
periectly insensible.
When consciousness returned, which was not
for some minutes, three men were about him,
drenching his head with water, and all en
deavoring to extract a word of explanation ;
but for long alter he could not speak a syllable,
nor, for some time, even hear distinctly what
they said.
Not a moment was lost, so soon as he was
able to describe what had happened, in direct
ing pursuit, wherever any results were the
least likely. All my brother could say as to
th* point toward which the assassin had di
rected his flight was that, as his sight failed,
he thought, though very distinctly, he saw him
pass away obliquely in the direction of tho
lane in which he had observed the donkey
cart.
It musk have belonged to an accomplice,
who was there by arrangement. Everything
had been prepared to carry away the body of
tho poor fellow, which would have been se
cured in tho sack, enveloped in tho carpet,
and covered with straw, and thus secreted in
some lonely lock-up yard, until, at dead of
night, it would havo been conveyed to the dis
secting-room. Tho boy’s hat thrown upon the
water would havo turned inquiry off tho scent,
and induced delay.
Tho strap, still buckled with cruel force
t about the poor artoe a«4 ribs, tuo
chamois cushion I have ■, , ~
pitch plaster fixed over th -*fl«Ohea, and the
race, were the only “pro 0 part of his
left to indicate his vis’ Of the villain
The cool old assa c „
other trace of hr baa carried off every
comrade, takr presence, and he and his
had decampr tho donkey-cart with them,
their disg’’ . a celerity, and managed
then we with an art which, as matters
purer &hd a full hour’s start, had baffled
T whatever was discovered to the
rfO’ul&be assassin, and this was marvelous,
Considering the marked peculiarities of dress
' and of person that belonged to the culprit.
The persons best acquainted with the ways of
our criminals at that period were of opinion
that the strange details of the dress, the gait,
the hair, the complexion, and the distortion of
the figure, were parts of an elaborate piece of
masquerading.
There was some controversy as to the object
of the projected crime, ft was not until the
terrific exposure at Edinburgh had made all
the world horribly familiar with the machinery
of that peculiar species of murder that all de
bate upon the matter ceased, and the pitch
piaster was accepted as conclusive evidence
that the body was intended for sale to the sur
geons.
No doubt these poachers on a great scale
were thoroughly skilled m all the fineness and
strategy of their contraband art. The regu
larity of my poor brother’s solitary walk, its
favorable hour, and the suggestion of drown
ing as the cause of his disappearance, had all
been noted, and the enterprise was, as I have
told you, very nearly accomplished, when an
unexpected interruption saved him.
My brother was ailing at the time this dread
ful attempt was made upon his life. He sur
vived it little more than ten months, and the
able physician who attended him referred his
death to the awful shock which his system had
received.
THE LATE JAMES BLUPSO, ESQ.
By a Disgusted Engineer.
I’ve read that screed about Bludso,
Who run on the Prairie Belle;
Whether him or the man that wrote it
Was the the biggest fool, I can’t tell.
But there's ono thing that’s dead certain,
The fellow who spun that yarn
Knows more about haystacks than smokestacks,
And I think that he’d better lam
Before writing of boatsand engines,
And engineer’s work and the like,
A safety valve from a throttle,
New York slang from Pike;
And as for a couple of wives or so,
And things as bad, or worse,
I hold those are private matters,
And not fit subjects for verse.
What I look at is the foolishness
That he puts in an engineer’s lips,
About “holding her nozzle agin the bank,”
And the way that he passed in his chips.
Does he think that a greaser uses a pole
To poke a steamer along?
Don’t he know that an engine 'ill go herself
Isyou open the throttle strong?
A man that runs on the Mississip
Has trouble and worry enough,
Without being saddled after he’s dead
With a lot of disgusting stuff.
Why a fellow that didn’t know more than him,
He couldn't have held a place
On a “wheelbarrow” boat to tow coal scows,
Much more on a packet to race.
If he had “ seen his duty” at all,
He’d have known that he could do more
By letting up on that “ yelling” of his,
And helping the others ashore;
But if he was such a dod-rotted ass
As to stay and be cooked that night
I know what a Pike comity verdict would be—
’Twould be, “served the derned fool just right”
The Bite of a Rattlesnake. —A cu
rious anecdote is related relative to a hospital
at llio Janeiro. Some time since, an ingenious
antiquary announced that the elephantiasis of
Brazil was the identical disease that used to
be cured among the ancient Greeks by the bite
of a snake. The assertion made some noise,
and one of the patients resolved to try the ex
periment. The physicians and his friends as
sembled on the appointed day; a rattlesnake
was brought into the room, in a gaiola—a spe
cies of cage. Into this the individual intro
duced his hand, with the most perfect pres
ence of mind. The reptile seemed to shrink
from the contact, as though there were some
thing in the part which neutralized its venom.
When touched, the serpent would even lick the
hand without biting. It became necessary at
length for the patient to grasp and squeeze
the reptitle tightly, in order to receive a thrust
from the fangs. The desired thrust was at
length given, near the base of the little finger.
So little sensation pervaded the member that
the patient was not aware he was bitten until
informed of it by those who saw the act. A
little blood oozed from the wound, and a slight
swelling appeared when the hand was with
drawn from the cage, but no pain was felt.
Moments of intense anxiety now followed,
while it remained to be seen whether the
strange application would Issue for the better
or for the worse. The effects became gradual
ly manifest, although it was evidently retard
ed by the disease which had pre-occupied the
system. In less than twenty-four hours tho
man was dead.
A Case of Petrifaction. —Mr. I. W.
Potter, of the town of Davison, Michigan, has
just erected a handsome monument on his lot in
Pine Grove Cemetery, and had the remains of
his father, two sisters-in-law, a brother, and a
nephew, removed from the farm to the ceme
tery, recently. The father had been buried
over thirty years, the nephew fifteen. On open
ing the graves, all the coffins but one were
found to be perfectly sound and lying in water,
which was struck a considerable time before
the coffins were reached. The latter, being
too heavy for removal, were left undisturbed;
but, on raising tho remains to place them in
proper receptacles for reinterment, it was
found that the body of Mr. Potter’s father was
completely petrified from the neck to below
the hips, presenting the appearance of a per
fectly sculptured gray stone statue, and re
taining the same sharp ring of stone when
touched with the shovel. The head and lower
limbs had undergone the usual changes, but
the arms and hands, which were folded on his
breast, still retained their wonted position and
form, and were also of stone. Mr. Pettier was
forty-seven years of age at tho time of his
death, and was a man of full, stout appear
ance, which the body still presents. Mr. 1. W.
Potter says that his nephew’s grave was not as
deep as the others, and that, though he had
been the last interred, his coffin was entirely
decayed.
A Mother’s Love—Affecting Inch
mint The St. Louis Democrat relates a little
incident which illustrates the fearful anxiety
of a mother’s heart. A lady living in the lower
part of the city had a son on board the Arthur,
and hearing of its loss and the great sacrifice
of life, her fears for his safety were intensely
awakened. Knowing that accounts would ear
liest reach the newspaper establishments, and
being acquainted with a Democrat compositor,
she visited his house at supper time on Satur
day night, with the view of getting Information
of her boy. The printer could tellher nothing,
and returned to his labors, promising to make
inquiry, and, if possible, relieve her solicitude.
Ou the receipt of our special dispatch from
Memphis, about one o’clock Sunday morning,
his heart was mado glad by the discovery of
the name of the young man in the list of saved,
and hastening home he found tho anxious
mother awaiting his arrival. Pale and trem
bling, it was with difficulty that she could as
sume a standing position. Her anxiety was
agonizing, and the witnesses of the scene were
melted to tears. With a husky voice the gen
tleman was enabled to tell the lady that her
son was among the saved. In thankfulness,
she threw her arms around his neck, kissed
him, and wept tears of gratitude for the safe
deliverance; from a watery grave, of her only
B on, the main stay of her declining years.
The Spaniards in California. —A
correspondent, writing from California about
the Spaniards, says:
They are strangers and aliens in the land
they once possessed. In Southern California,
being somewhat massed together, they are
still able to make some head against the incur
sion of American ideas and American customs ;
but most of them, even here, are trading, traf
ficking, close, practical, like Americans—at
least toward Americani. Ihaveknown aproud
old family, too indolent to labor, and too
haughty, trying to live on a hundred cattle,
pastured on the “ range,” borrow a shot-gun
from an American, and shoot some quails, as
they had absolutely nothing in the house to
eat. A good many of their daughters, of the
lower sort, subsist almost entirely on the pres
ents of their lovers, the bachelor rancheros,
like the Parisian grisettes, and they do not
work like the latter. AU of them, who are
marriageable, except some few of the proudest
and poorest families, who keep up the old bit
terness, are on the look-out for Americans, as
being the best average bread-winners.
Curious Story. —A correspondent
Of the London Times tells this curious story:
Two dragoons found themselves surrounded
and about to be taken prisoners by thirty Mo
biles. One of them could speak a little French,
and one of the French soldiers was an Alsa
tian who could speak German; there was thus
no difficulty in communicating. The dragoons
refused to surrender on an entirely new and
original ground. “If we go with you,” said
they, “we shall share your discomfort, but if
you come with us you will share our comfort
and escape all the dangers and hardships of
the war. On the whole, you will gain far more
by letting us take you than by making prison
ers of us.” This reasoning proved irresisti
ble, and the two dragoons rode back to their
regiment with their thirty Mobiles following
them like sheep. The Grand Duke was so
much pleased with the readiness they had dis
played upon the occasion that he made them
each a handsome present, which, alas I one of
them was not destined long to enjoy, for be
was shot a low hours later,
1 A Judge’s Head in Jeopardy,— -Ann
Gilhouly, says the Pittsburgh (Pa.) Leader,
1 one of those abandoned termagents who make
their home in the county jail, was arrested in
the Second Precinct on Saturday, as a com
mon drunkard, and was yesterday morning ar
raigned before the City Judge. The dispenser
of the law talked to her like a father. She ac
knowledged the correctness of the charge
against her, and he endeavored to advise her
as to her future course, and concluded by sen
tencing her to the county jail for sixty days.
“ Are yees done ?” responded Ann ; “thin I’ll
knock tho head off ye, ye d—d old [some
thing about a female dog],” at which she
picked up from his desk a copy of “ Nixon’s
Digest” and hurled it with great violence at
, his head.
Luckily for the judge, he divined her inten
tion and dodged tho blow, saving his head, but
receiving the blow on Iris arm, the book then
jumping his head and lodging against the win
dow. The judge had no more advice for her,
but at once changed her .term of imprisonment
from sixty to and ordered her re
moval from his presence. '
Singular Marriage £.ll Around.—
Mrs. Cummings, of Westboro’, Mass., recently
went to Boston to do some shopping, While
standing in the street she was accosted by a
young man with whom she strolled about and
whom she agreed to marry, notwithstanding
the fact that she already had a husband alive
and well. She said her name was Abbie Watts,
and the gallant stranger took her to his home
at Lynn and married her. Soon afterward she
went to Boston and wrote to her husband, beg
ging him to send her clothes to an address she
gave. The husband came, and when she saw
him she fell on her knees and told him what
she had done, saying that she had been mar
ried, but could remember nothing that hap
pened between the time when the ceremony
was performed and the moment when she saw
him. She is now in the hands of physicians,
as it is probable she is insane. The young
man could hardly have been compos mentis
thus to marry a stranger. Indeed the whole
affair looks like a freak of a parcel of lunatics,
for the second “husband’s” father and mother
welcomed tho bride to their home. %
How to Obtain Obesity.— Eastern
travelers tell about the very curious mode of
fattening for the Imperial harem practiced in
Morocco. You take a plump young damsel of
about fourteen, with a tendency to obesity—
few Mooresquo girls are destitute of such a
tendency—and you shut her up in a room of
which the windows are carefully darkened by
heavy curtains of green silk. Sou cause your
plump young damsel to sit cross-legged on a
divan, and then, having by your side a bowl
full of couscoussou, or moistened meal rolled
, into balls, you cram her, daring a certain num
ber of hours every day, with as many of these
balls as she can conveniently swallow. Well
crammed, the Emperor of Morocco will pay an
exceedingly handsome price for her. That
nothing may interfere with the due conduct of
the fattening process, a black nurse stands
behind the incipient favorite with a matrank,
or big stick, much used in Moorish domestic
economy; and if the patient manifests any re
luctance to swallow the balls of couscoussau,
she is immediately and unmercifully thrashed.
Clay’s Response to a Serenade.—
A correspondent of the Philadelphia Press
gives the following reminiscence of. Henry
Clay: *
He was stopping at the United States Hotel,
and in the evening a large crowd collected in
the street, in front of the hotel, and called
loudly for “Clay!” “Clayl” For a consider
able time, ho did not respond. At length,
however, he appeared, apparently not very
well pleased at this persistent demand on his
time, and spoke as follows :
“ Follow-citizens : You that have wives, had
better go home to them; you that have sweet
hearts, had better be enjoying their society ;
and you that have neither, had better go home
to your mothers. As for me, I intend to spend
the evening in the society of those ladies,”
pointing to the parlor of the hotel.
The crowd could hardly have been more sur
prised if a shell had burst in their midst. A
dead silence prevailed for a moment, and they
slowly and suddenly dispersed.
A Detective Outwitted. —The other
day a New Orleans detective arrested a man
on suspicion of having stolen a valuable dia
mond pin. Being hard pressed, the thief
owned up, and surrendered the jewel to the
officer, who placed it in his shirt bosom. On
the way to the lock-up the officer and prisoner
got on board a horse car, and in doing so tho
former was considerably jostled by a crowd on
the platform. Just then the prisoner whis
pered in his ear:
“ Look out, captain 1 that was a thief who
passed you just now.”
The officer glanced hurriedly at his shirt
front. The pin was gone 1 He sprang from
the car and started in pursuit of the imaginary
thief. It is needless to say ho was not to bo
found, and when he returned his former pris
oner was missing also. The next day the vigi
lant (?) detective had his already overwrought
feelings lacerated anew by the receipt of a
pencil line, saying:
“ Captain, I’m gone; I take the pin with me.
It was too nice to give up.”
Remarkable Meteor in Daylight.—
A few weeks ago, says the Nairnshire (Scot
land) Telegraph, about a quarter to three
o'clock, as Provost Mackintosh and another
gentleman were riding near Lochloy, to the
east of this town, the pony ridden by the for
mer suddenly relused to proceed, and trem
bling violently, sought to retrace its steps.
Tho cause of its agitation was immediately dis
covered in the passage of a beautiful meteor
right in front of tho party at a distance of ap
parently a quarter of a mile. Its course was
parallel with the horizon, from east to west,
through about 70 degrees of space, and it
presented the appearance of a train of phos
phorescent light that shone brilliantly oven
in tho bright sunshine, somewhat resembling
the flame of the magnetism wire, but no smoke
was visible. The observers were particularly
struck with the gentle pace at which the meteor
passed, very much resembling a flight of wild
fowl, continuing in sight for several seconds,
and then vanishing without altering its hori
zontal course.
Hopeless Invalids in Southern Ho
tels.—The Boston Traveler says: A lady who
had been boarding at a Southern hotel, among
sick and dying Northern people, writes indig
nantly to her friends about the cruelty of send
ing hopeless invalids away from the con
venience and comforts of home, to suffer and
die among strangers, without any home com
forts and allevations. And yet, physicians are
continually doing that same thing. Having a
patient for whom they can do nothing, they
send him South, with the delusive hope of re
covery, when there is nothing before him but a
sad and solitary death, away from home and
friends. In the incipient stages of disease, and
when the patient is well enough to take care
of himself, and to bear without great suffering
the rough and tumble of “ a life abroad,” it
may be an excellent prescription to try a South
ern climate ; but where disease has got a firm
hold, the cases are very tew in which an ex
periment is advisable or safe.
Steel Printing Type. —M. Bauer,
of Paris, has taken a patent for the manufac
ture of steel printing types. According to tho
specification, the inventor employs a machine
similar to those for making pins or nails ; a
roll of wire being placed on a reel, the maehine
nips off a piece of a given length, and forces
one emfof it into the steel die. Fine soft iron
wire, drawn to the shape of the body of the
type, is used for the purpose. After leaving
the machine, the types require trimming by
hand. When this has been effected, they are
placed in metal boxes with the materials used
or cementation, and are heated to a proper
temnoraturo in a furnace. The inventor says
that, with a single machine and steam to the
extent of one nominal horse power, he can pro
duce thirty-five thousand types in twelve hours,
and that while the faces are far more perfect
and more durable, the types themselves are
cheaper than those in general use.— Mechanic
and Builder,
English Mode of Taking the Cen
sus On the night of Palm Sunday, April 2, in
the present year, the decimal numbering of
the people of Great Britain and Ireland will be
taken. The mode of taking the census will be
as follows: Some time m tho course of tho
week ending Saturday, April 1, a printed form
will be left with the occupier of every house or
separate lodging, and the occupier is bound—
under a penalty of not less than 20s—to fill up
the same correctly with the name, sex, age,
rank, condition, relation to head of family,
and birthplace of every person abiding with
him on the night of Sunday, April 2 ; stating
also whether any are blind, deaf, dumb, imbe
cile or lunatic. These forms or schedules will
be collected by the enumerators on the follow
ing day, and corrected by them if found erro
neous. Their contents will then be copied in
to books, tabulated, and a summary made and
published about the beginning I>f June.
The Paradise of Gamblers. —They
have a queer way of administering justice in
Petaluma, Cal. A man who had lost his mo
ney at a gambling table prosecuted the gam
bler, who was fined one hundred dollars, which
he paid. A complaint was then made against
the poor fellow who lost Jiis money, charging
him with playing at the game. He was tried
by a jury and convicted. The judge fined him
one Hundred dollars, tho same penalty that
had been imposed on tho gambler. As tho
gambler had all his money he could not pay
is fine, and was sent to jail, and is now in
durance, while tho faro dealer is plying his
vocation as usual. Petaluma ought to be a
gambler’s Paradise.
Horsb Thieves in California.—
Horse thieves lead short and wretched exist
ences in California. The Sheriff of San Diogo
county recently shot two and captured four.
The latter were turned over to the Mexican
authorities, being caught on Mexican terri
tory, and threo of them were immediately exe
cuted, the fourth being pardoned on account
of bis extreme youth,
Sunday Edition. Fehrwy 14.
The Horrors of Bombardment.—
The following incident is related by a Park
correspondent: “In the midst of the firins
nine people set down to breakfast in a smal
house upon the plateau of Avron. There
were the commander of the sixth battalion ol
Mobiles of the Seme (M. Heintzler), his wife,
the adjutant of the battalion, a captain, twe
lieutenants, an ensign, a chaplain and a
doctor—nearly all of the same'battalion. A
Prussian shell camo smashing upon the table,
and killed six of the party. The commandant
and his wife were wounded. The only one who
escaped unhurt was tho doctor. Of the eight
persons who were killed, Six belonged to thia
little breakfast party. ‘There wants but a
shell to give us butter,’ one of the party had.
said. Instantly came a shell, and blew six of
them out of existence, while wounding two
more, the commandant and his wife.”
Hotel Advertisement, Ono of th&
hotels in Cordova, Spain, deserves passing
mention on account of the ingeniously bad
English in which it invites the custom of tour
ists. The following is a copy verbatim et liter
atim of this curious document: “Rizzi Hotel
Situated in the Nmost centrick place of Cor
dova. This splendid and distinguished estab
lishment contains spacious and elegant rooms
with independant lodging house for families
who wish to live in. The foods are served into
and out of establishment besides of the table
d’hote with wines of all countries after the bill
of fare. Ynterpro ters who speak English
franco germany Ytalian. Yt also has ackney
coach and hole of post offiqe. Spring season,
hotel Belongs to Rizzi Hotel. Yt is tho most,
picture sque region of tho Sierra Morena
brow. The water and clime of the land are
very beautiful I”
Fighting for the Right to Tickle.
—A young man of tho name of Joseph recently
tickled a young lady in church on North Bars
Island, in Ohio. The lady squealed, and the
preacher bared his arm and sailed into the wor
shipers “ powerful.” He said women and men
should no more sit together under the drop
pings of his sanctaary. But, even with tho
possibility of being tickled before their eyes,
the ladies refused to be separated, and on the
very next evening all sat together. The
preacher was indignant, and brought the male
- portion of his congregation before a justice of
the peace. A jury was demanded, and no juror,
should be a member of the church. Threo
days the trial lasted, but at last the oppressed
went free, and now in church they tickle each
other as of yore, to keep awake in an amusing,
manner.
Torn to Pieces. —Last week a fatal
accident occurred at Roberts’ torpedo factory,
near Titusville, Pa., from the premature ex
plosion of a torpedo. The victim was a Mr..
Palmer, and the impression is that he was in
the act of charging a torpedo with fulminating
powder when the explosion took place. This
material is the most dangerous of all com
pounds used in torpedoes, oven so much so
that after filling the shell It has always been
customary to sponge off the top of tho shell
with water before screwing on the cap, so it is
thought Mr. Palmer neglected to do this, and
by this neglect has lost his fife. His body was
terribly mangled, his abdomen and chest com
pletely blown away, his legs and right arm
shattered into small fragments, presenting a
horribly sickening spectacle.
A Good Word for Haggerty. —The
Philadelphia Sunday Transcript says the fol
lowing good word tor Haggerty : Jimmy Hag
gerty is a dead man. He led a reckless lite,
and his end followed in away comporting with
his career. He made nis bed, and wo leave
him in it. He had his faults, and they should
be buried with him. Ho had his virtues, and
the primary ono was that he was not, as some
of his friends here are, a cowardly assassin,
whose heroism finds vent only in “double
banking.” Ho never sought a quarrel save
with one of his class; he never took the mean
advantage of “ crowding” inoffensive mon; and
above all, he never depended upon others to
do what he feared to do himself. He roughed
his way, but he roughed it like a man.
The Effeminate Man. —A contem
porary asserts that the effeminate man is a
weak poultice. Ho is a cross between root
beer and ginger-pop, with the cork left out.
A fresh-water mermaid found in a cow pasture
with hands filled with dandelions. He is a
tea-cup full of syllabub; a kitten in panta
lettes ; a sick monkey with blonde mustache.
He is a vine without any tendrils ; a fly drowned
in oil; a paper kite in a dead calm. He lives
like a butterfly—nobody can tell why. Ho is
as harmless as a cent’s worth of spruce gum,
and as useless as a shirt button without a hole.
He is as lazy as a bread pill, and has no more
hope than a last year’s grasshopper. He goes
through life on tiptoes, and dies like cologne
water spilt over the ground.
Right to the Custody of a Monster.
—A medical man has no right to detain an in
fant mermaid from its parents. It is well to
know that Mr. Partridge has decided this.
The other day a respectable bricklayer came
before him, and stated that his wife had given
birth to a child, “ the upper part of the body
being perfect, and the lower extremities some
what resembling a fish ” —the exact description
of a mermaid—and the doctor had taken it
away, saying he wanted it for scientific pur
poses. 'The father very properly objected to
his offspring being bottled or otherwise made a
show of, and the magistrate, sympathizing in
that view, gave the important decision already
stated.— South London (Eng.) Press.
Cuts Her Throat. —The Reading,
Pa., Eagle of the 3d says : Yesterday afternoon
a sad occurrence took place near Rockland
Furnace, in Rockland township, ■which re
sulted in the death of Mrs. Augustus Well.
While her husband, who is a repairsman on
the East Pennsylvania Railroad, was away
from home, she went up stairs and spread a
feather bed on the floor, and placed a stool
near it, then seated herself on the feather bed
and took her husband’s razor out of tho case,
laid the case on the stool, and cut a gash in
her throat from ear to ear, closed the razor
and placed it beside of its case, and then fell
backward and died. She was the mother of
eight children, and was enciente.
Full of Fun. —An elephant em
ployed by the government of India in hauling
teak logs for the forest department, in the An
namally forest, lately brought about a suspen
sion of operations for about a fortnight. Ho
began by knocking down his keeper, but luck
ily did not kill him. He then made for tho
huts of the keepers, whose wives and families
were driven into the jungle. He displayed his
skill in pulling down the buls, smashing up
the carts and implements, and destroying a
quantity of provisions stored up for his lirother
elephants. After keeping the settlement in
alarm for some fifteen days, ho was shot in One
of the legs, and then caught and chained.
Intrinsic Purity of Ice. —Beside
tho fact that ice is lighter than water, there is
another curious thing about it which many
persons do not know, perhaps —namely, its
purity. A lump of ice melted will become pure
distilled water. Water in freezing turns out of
it all that is not water—salt, air, coloring mat
ters, and all impurities. Frozen sea water
makes fresh water ice. If you freeze a hasin
of indigo water, it will make ice as clear and as
white as that made of pure ram water. When
the cold is very sudden, these foreign matters
have no time to escape, either by rising or
sinking, and are thus entangled with the ice,
but do not make any part of it.
A Celestial Notice. —The Bulle
Record says: “A correspondent from Butt©
Creek Bends us the following as a fac simile of
atlhinese mining notice he saw posted on a
stump at or near Centreville:
“ Noris I Noris i!
IKa* Look See
“Me likeo work here. May be walcy good
claim. Pay one dolla, one dolla hap, me too
muchee long time work, me waley good man ;
long time California ; all time pay lisen, load
tax, one war tax (poll tax), no stealum chicken.
Yu talkey Beu Harbor. He talkey all iightee,.
he sabe me. Sam Ling Co.”
Manufacture of Tacks. —Two hun
dred and fifty different kinds of tacks arc man®
ufactured from brass, copper, zinc, iron, and
steel. The material from which tacks are
made is first cut iuto long strips as wide as
the required length of the tack. It is then put
into a machine which cuts into tacks or nails,
as the case may be. as quickly and as easily as
a boy would munch a stick of candy. Tho pol
ishers are then brought into requisition. They
are then conveyed to where young women aro
employed in weighing, papering, labeling, ami
parceling them, preparatory to boxing.
High Old Elopement. —The town
of Ukiah was lately visited by an eloping party
from the lower part of Sonoma county, Cal., a
young girl and a young man. The finances of
the institution were in a bad condition, the
young lady being nearly barefooted, and the -
other party not having the wherewith to buy
her a pair of shoes. They were not married,
but only intended to be. The girl, aged fifteen
years or so, was returned to her mother. The
whole thing may, probably, be summed up as
a piece of great indiscretion.
Strange Fatal Accident. —The m oat
extraordinary fatality of this most extraordi
nary age, was that by which.a man in New Or
leans bad his throat cut by a falling piece of
glass, while passing a store where the glass
was being removed. So serious was tne injury
that the unfortunate man died in a few min
utes. People have before now deliberately
tried to cut their throat with a razor, ana
failed ; yet how many more chances there are
in favor of the razor as against the glass? I
•* I
Look Out for Lead Pipes. —A man
in the vicinity of Woodstock, Vt., has been sc
severely poisoned and paralyzed by drinking,
cider that had been conducted through a lca<s
ripe into his cellar, that ho is unable to raise
iis hands to his head or to attend to his or
dinary business. The pipe was not cleansed,
or rinsed out the first year, but laid Way, a#<J
used last Fall without cleaning,

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