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HUMOUS OF THE POLICE. Running a Caso by tho Defenso-A Leg that Causes Great Trouble—The President Acks a Conuundrum—A Positive Swear and a Flat Denial—An Officer that does not Un derstand “Cheese It”—What an Officer Thinks Justifies Arrest and Clubbing-A Stringy Case—Sergeants Up for Trial A Police Fixture on the Road-Tried by the T rials. For a wonder last week there were no cases with * woman m it; it was the ordinary run oi Hat con tradiction—in other words, perjury somewhere. damaging- his own case. Patrolman Kuely, of the Tenth Precinct, was Charged with being iu the hallway of a beer Bxloon. That w;-s ail theca was in it till lie attempt ed to get in manufactured evidence, only to ru.a his case. , Sergeant Young said, “March 16th, going down Essex street, with lioundsinan O’Toole, he saw Keeiy go down Broome street in the direction of the Bowery. After crossing Essex street, he stopped and talked three minutes with a man and woman and went back with them to this lager beer saloon. The t-. o (man and woman) went in the alley way, and Miter standing a minute be jumped in the alleyway, and as I went up he came out wiping bis moutn. At the name time a man handed the man and woman a glaci 01 xager each. X asked him what he was doing in th?re. and he said be was after some boys.” Keely said the man that kept the saloou was a new Jman, and too boys had broken a pane of glass. Pas sing there at 9 o’clock, be went in the alley, and the t>oys jumped ovi r the feme, and he came out of the »Uey. Bcrgeant—H: want up with a man and woman—-o went in after them, and jumped out wiping his jnouth. . President—Now. after that definiteness, don tyou think you had better change your line of defease ? Kiely—l went la alter the noys. S-'tgeant—l did not see any boys. Kaely—These boys broke a pa; e of glass an hour iietore tha . This was ten o’clock, aud. I ran in after them. I only jumped iu utter turning the Xnob, and they went out the back way. President—Do you want to call these witnesses ? Keely—-Yes, sir. President—Well, be it on your own held. Oscar Lentz was called, and said he was in the hall-way of the lager bier saloon about ten o’clock, jus; exactly, he knew that by the grocery clock next door. Told the officer about boys breaking a pane of plass about Dine o’clock. The boys were not there when the officer came. They had been there five minutes before that. He went iu to look tor the boys. He came with the officer, there was no ■woman. Fra z Ziedel stated through an interpreter that lu .knew no English. Recently ha started tais lujer bier saloon, at No. 231 Broome street, and because he was a greenhorn the boys annoyed him and broke a pane of glass. He knew they were boys because tuey ran away. He did not see the*officer in the alley, did not take or send any beer out to him, or any other man or woman. Roundsman O’Toole said he saw Keely go in the door with a mau and woman. He jumped iu the hall and stopped two minutes, leaving the mau and w oman drinkinj beer there. Who handed the beer to could not say, it was a man. LIQUOR AFFECTING ONLY ONE LEG. The charge against Patrolman Parsed, of the 2Lu(h Precinct, was intoxication, at 9:10 P, M., March 18« h. Sergeant Crocker said at 9:20 P. M., liouudsmau Byrnes and Brush brought Parsell to iue station-house so much under the influence of J.quor that ne sent him to bed. “In wuat way was he affected ?” asked the Presi de tj t. «- He staggered, was thick in his conversation, in Xis looks and general appearance.” “Have you any questions to ask?” “No,” replied Parsed, “but I would like to mike a statement. m toe riots of sixty-three I was in jured in toy le", and they, the doctors, were going to take it off, but they didn’t; and the feast bit ol drink I take, it goes to my leg. Last year I have ■repotted six or eight times sick, burgeon Ensign knows it.” “Driuk doesn’t take your brain, but your leg,” Baid the President, with a smile. “ When it gets in your leg it gets iu your bead.” “No, th s was St. Patrick’s day; I was tired out, and 1 took a drink iu my own house.” Rounds;uan Brush said he helped to bring Parsell into the station-house. On the evening of ths 18th, on the corner of Christopher and Greenwich streets, a citizen told him that there was a drunken,.police jnan up the street. Looking for him, ho came stag gering along the s dewalk. Seeing that he was not able to patrol, he asked him it he was sick, He said no, and be took him to the station-house. Parsell asked if be was not od a Jimp, giving an example of his mode of pedestriauism, “No, you were staggering,” said Brash. “I aeked if you were sick or disabled in any way not fit to dp patrol duty, awl you said no, and then I took you in.” * aSJuT THE EXCISE LAW. Patrolman Lynch, of the Twenty-second Precinct, -/ras charged with being in the liquor saloon at Fifty fourth street and Ninth avenue, on March 21st. Roundsman Brooks said he saw the officer go in there. After he was in five minutes he went in after him, and found him at the extreme end leaning on the bar. He was asked what he was doing in there. He said to see about the excise law. “.Can you afford to tell me what you went in for ?” poked the President. •• I c?.me dQwp trying my doors, and there was «omo noise inside. I »aw po violation of the excise la v, and in the act of coming °ut I met the rounds mau. I was in two minutes.” . >.«!»*—- “ The roundsman says five.” “ D.d you see me there ?” asked Lynch. “ Yes,” replied the roundsman; “your arms were ea the bar.” “ I can’t see how you were in there five minutes en police duty,” said the President. “ You had not your watch out, but the roundsman had his. You had the intention to tell the truth.” “ That is true, no doubt,” was the response of Lynch. •• Roundsman, was there anybody in there but the ©ffiser ?” “ Yes, sir—the barkeeper and a citizen.” “ Any glasses ?” “ No. I asked the barkeeper what he came in for, and he said he did not know. A citizen then spoke up and said : ‘O, yes, became in to see if’he had got a license.’ ” A SQUARE DENIAL. Doorley, of the Twenty-second Precinct, was charged with being in a lager-beer saioon, March 18th. Roundsman Kirschner said on the morning oi the 18th, on Tenth avenue, he saw the officer walk elowly down. When Doorley got opposite No. 825, somebody spoke to him from the lager beer saloon. He then looked up and down the street, and walked up to Fifty-first street, and walked back, and went in off the street, and immediately stepped out. ■When asked what business he had iu there, he said he was not in. A member of the Fire Department came out immediately after, and he was asked what tee officer was doing in there. He said he called him to tell him if there was an alarm of fire to stop it—it was only smoke escaping from the window. Kirschner then went back and asked the proprietor of the saloon what the officer was doing in there, and he said he came in to see if anything had been stolen. Doorley then said he only had one foot iu. Taere were three versions of the affair. There could be no mistake about being in, as the roundsman stood on the opposite of the street, saw him go iu, and saw h»m come out. —"-*****"- ♦ “I swear positively 1 was not in that place that morning. I have also three respectable witnesses to testify to the same thing, that I was not in ttiat morning. After these witnesses are examined, I wish to ask the roundsman a lew questions. Whit do you accuse me of doing, roundsman ?” “You came out wiping your mouth.” “Did you say I had two chops in two places before that?” “I never made the remark iu my life.” “Didn’t you say it looked bad to go into every gin-mill you passed ?” “1 don’t know; I said you loitered too long on your post,” • < Hefity Schenck, a member of the Fire Depart ment, said he was iu the lager-bier saloon, but Doorley was not; he stood by the door two minutes. Schenck said he was called to a place where there 'was smoke coming out of a chimney, and as Doorley was passing, he called him and said if there was an alarm of fire sent out to let them know it was fa se. He was not on duty at the time, wag going break fast He stood in the door way,’ and Doorley cdmo no further than the sill of the door. Mrs. Dingleman, wije of tbe proprietor of the saloon, said she was Sweeping the side-walk and saw Doorley go to the door, but no further. She could not say that he talked to anybody inside. There Mas nobody in the doorway, butane saw the fireman go out. Mr. Dingleman, the husband, said there was some smoke in the saloon and the fireman came in and wanted some information, and tne officer passed with another man (the roundsman). He asked what the officer was doing in taere. He was busy wash ing bis windows, and he does not recollect what he said, but believes he said he did not know. “If I were jou.” said the President, addressing the witness, M 1 would not like to be called down on thia sort of business; it is evident you don’t hke it.” THE TWENTY-FIRST PRECINCT CLUBBING CASE. The cise of Patro m.n John Herlihy, of the Twenty-first Precinct, c -arged with clubbing Chas. Koerber, a message do/ in the Board of Health, was tried. Colonel Hastings apoeared for the boy and Hr. John O. Mott for the officer. Koerber said he lived at No. 351 E’Bt Thirty-first street, and bad been messenger to the Board oi Health for two years. On the 18th of March, about ten o’clock in the evening, having been out for a pitcher of beer, aa he came in the doorway of his bouse, he saw this officer and a girl inside the rail ing next door. He was leaning on the railing as he r,hatted to her. Just as he was going in the door be halloed •• Cheese it,” and stood laughing to see him get out on the double quick. The officer then came up and clubbed him on the arm, then called him out of his name and struck him on the fore head. He ran iu the house, pursued by the officer, to the back room, and the officer caught him by the cellar and gave him a lively shake-up and struck him twice. His brother, who was on the sofa, ran cut and brought in the mother, and when the bro ther came back he was clubbed. The mother asked why her boy was hit, and he said be was talking to a lady and her son said, “Cheese it,” and that was why he struck him. He had asked the boy what he meant, and the reply was, “Go to —Koerber then said he lied. Ha jumped for the boy again, and the mother said, “Don’t strike him.” He then struck the mother about the body and broke her arm. George Koerber, the brother, testified to the same facts, occurring in the housj, and so also did a young man named John Kelly. Coris ian Ko?rber, the father, said the officer rushed in after his boy and clubbod him like a mur derer. He also corroborated the main facts. None of the family used any violence. On the cross-exam ination, counsel wanted to show that the wife of ■witness, when she married him, had a husband in Bellevue Hospital. Ku ed out. He offered to prove that they were a quarrelsome family. Ruled out. That Mrs. Koerber was a heavy weight woman—22s pounds—and a fighting woman, add bad actually fought a prize fight in the city. Ruled out. Tl.< effi er then gave his version of the affair. Blanding talking at the door with Miss Carr e Cart right, after be had given an order for some coal, she began to tell him how she was annoyed and in sulted by the folks next door. Just then young Koerber came up, and said: “Cheese it!” He asked lim what he meant, and be said: “Go to .” He then took a hold of the boy, who struck him on the bivast, and then run in the house, and the officer followed alter him to rearrest him. result was, self-defense. After his direct and cross-examina tion, tho President took him up. “ Did you understand him to speak to you?” ho asked. “Because this boy was insulting, and passing her all the time.” “Whit do you understand to bo the meaning of •Cheese it?’ ” t “1 don’t know.” “ And he answered you as you have described ?” 5 “Yes, sir.” «Were you • mouth in school before you went out on duty?” - “Yes, sir.*’ r“Do you know Rule 551?” “No, sir.” This was read. Each member of the force, In his conduct and deportment, must be quiet, civil and or leriy, and maintain patience and be discreet. s Rule 092, which sets forth that policemen should ' not use harsh or abusive language, &c., was read. “Did you ever hear of that rule ?” asked the Pres ident i “Yes, sir.” “Now, in what way wag this arrest made under grave circumstances ?” “Using that profane language. I have arrested parties for using that language on the street.” j “Do you understand what that rule says ?” - “Yes, sir.” “Don’t you think that was rather a quarrel of j your own ?” “No.” ! “ Or was it really a quarrel in the street that you r had taken up P” s “A quarrel of the city.” ( •• You say he struck yea?” ! “Yes, sir; and broke away, and I ran into the house.” i “ Whom did you strike first ?” , “The two beys.” ««Both together ?” , “This boy,” (complainant). “ Where di 1 you strike the boy ?” “On the head. I don’t think I struck him more than once or twice.” “ Did you knock him down ?” “No.” Carrie Cartright, the miss that the officer was chatting with, was called, and began to state the in sults she had received from Charlie. She stated that the officer was not inside the railing leaning. That when this foul language was used, and. the officer went for him, Charlie struck him, and had some thing bright in his band. Her testimony was far stronger than that of the officer himself. The case was closed by a number of witnesses giv ing negative testimony lor the officer that had little bearing on the case. UP-TOWN SPORTS. Lamb, of the I’wenty-second Precinct, was timed eleven minutes iu conversation with a citizen, at Fiftieth street and Broadway. When asked by O’Neil what he was talking about, he said he was re marking tae clean condition of the streets. O’Neil told him even on that topic he stood too long. Lamb said some boys nad tied a string to tho door of a lager beer store and had attached it to beer wagono across the pavement to knock off th« hats ox passers by. He stood live minutes iu the shade to catch them, when the foreman of the street clean ing gang came and he asked how far he swept down Broadway, and remarked how clean it looked. He admitted standing but not talking that time. ‘•You say you saw that string?” “No, I didn’t see it; but I saw a gentleman who had seen it, r.nd he colled my attention to it. There are three trees there, and I stood in the Bhade to catch them.” “Did you say anything to the roundsman about the string?” “No.” •• Why not ?” “He asked what I was conversing about and I told him.” COMPLAINTS AGAINST SERGEANTS. Wilson, of the Thirtieth Precinct, on his day off, was sent for to go on special duty, and could not bo found. Delamater, of the Thirtieth Precinct; Thomp son, of the Tbiiteenth, aud Wandling, of the Thir teenth Precinct, were guilty Jof making improper entries or erasures in the blotter. A FIXTURE. Boyd, of the Thirty-fourth Precinct, was eharged with standing two hours at the extreme end oi his post. He stood at the end of the post where no bur glaries are committed, but where the roundsman stood, six or eight burglaries occur in the week. Boyd said the post WvS two miles long, and it would tako him an hour to go over it TAKING IT EASY. Patrolman Stevenson, of the Twenty-ninth Pre cinct, was found in a marble yard on Broadway. Roundsman Wallace went twice over the post before finding him there comfortably seated in a chair. He said he was tired. He bad been to the Central Office that day on trial, and he was worn out, “I only toid that in a jest to the roundsman,” said Stevenson. “I went mto write out my report and came right out, and made no bones of it.” The roundsman said he was sitting down with his arms on the chair, not at all writing. The Commissioner said he was a chronic Bitter. JUDGMENTS BY THE BOARD. CAPTAINS. John McElwain, 7th, complaint dismissed. BEhGEANTS. Theron Thompson, 13th, fined live dayjk Michael Switt, 33d, fined three days." John J. Wright, 33<1, fined three days, Charles Wandling, 13th, fined three days. Charles R. Wilson, 3l)th, complaint dkumssed. < - PATROLMEN. John J. Hennessey, 35th, dismissed department. Albert C. Johnson, 4th, fined twenty days. Thomas Quinlan, 14th, fined twenty dayp. , John Dunn, 18th, fined ten daye. Pat. McGloin, 18th, fined ten days. Henry Schmitz. Htlh toed tm James Lynch, 22a, fined five days. Peter darken, 28th, lined five days, Dennis Collins, 7th, fined five days. Thomas Hickey, 28th, fined five days, Fred. S. White, 27th, lined five days. Ed. Costello, Ist. fined five days. Albert C. Johnson, 4th, fined five days. Kobert Stevenson, 29th, fined five days. Thomae Mnlvey, 18th, fined three days. John McCabe, 12th, fined three days. Albe. t Kellerho ise, 35th, flued three days. John Hagan, 18th, fined three days. John McCauley, 14th, fined three days. George Broderick. 11th, fined three days. Loma Kain, 18th, fined three days. John Hallon, 14th, fined throe days. Win. Lally, 12th, fined three days. James 11. Dunlap, 27th, fined three dayo. John Madison, 3lst, fined three days. James Mahoney, J9th fined two days. Peter Holbrook, 11th, fined two days. Robert Ramsey, 28th, fined two days. Reinhold Krammer, 11th, fined two days. James McCabe, Sth, Hned two days. Daniel J. Mulcjiahy, sth, fined two days. Walter Burke, 22d, fined two days. Milton F. Decker, 16tli, fined two days. David Jackson, Ist, fined two days. Robert Stevenson, 29th, fined one day, Pat. Bolger, 17th, fined one day. David Bartley, Sth, fined one day. James 11. Dunlap, 15th, fined one day, Jienry Butts, 22d, fine.! half a day. Thos. W. Murphy. 12th, fined halt a day. Thos. W. Murphy, 12th (again), fined half a da?. Wia. Reilly, Stu, fined half a day. Chas. Floyd, sth, fined half a day. David O’Callahan, 27th, fined haif a day. Thos. McGovern, 21th, fined half a day. August Alberts, sth, fined half a day. James Heenan, 21st, fined half a day. John Jeffries. 29th, fined half a day. Martin O’Day, Tvtn, flued half a day. John Dickey, 21st, fined half a day. Aug. M. De Ayse, 15th, fined half a day. John Burke, Bth, lined half a day. Henry C. Gibson, 10th, fined halts day. Bernard Lamb, 22d, fined half a day. Fred A Raduns, 14th, fined half a day. Stephen Roff’, 19th. complaint dismissed. Jas. Maloney, 19th, complaint dismissed. Wm. H. Reuck, 21st, complaint dismissed. Tim O’Leary, 4th, complaint dismissed. Josiah Elting, 30tb, complaint dismissed. Henry Ratchford, 11th, complaint dismissed. John Meagher, 21st, complaint dismissed. Geo. J. Chapman, 21st, complaint dismissed, Chris. Belton, 14th, complaint dismissed. Michael Nolan, 18th, complaint dismissed. JYanklin Boyd, filth, complaint dismissed. Ambrose H. Cole, 15th, complaint dismissed. Win. Ellard, 21st, complaint dismissed. Thos. J. Egan, 12th, complaint dismlp ed. John Hennessey, 35tb, complaint dismissed. John King, 13th, complaint dismissed. Ed J. Kerly, 10th, complaint dismissed. Thos. O’Brien, 30th, complaint dismissed. Mort. A. Roberts, 14th, complaint dismissed. James J. Sullivan, 29th, complaint dismissed. Chas. L. Scbauwaeker. liltb, complaint dismissed. Bernard C. Thompson, 12th, complaint dismissed. Maurice Tracy, 17th, complaint dismissed. Michael Tully, filfth, complaint dismissed. from Or Ik Mine Katrine. BY CHARLES V. ADAMS. You vomdn’t dink mine frau, If you sbußt look at her now, Taere der wrinkles on her prow Long hat been, V..s der fraulein blump and fair, Mit der vafy flaxen hair, Who did vonce mine heart enshuara; Mme Katrine. Der dime seems shord to me B.nee ve game acrosd dor sea, To der gouniry oil der free Ve’d nefer seen; Bud ve hear de beoples say Dhere vas vork uud blendy pay, So I shtarted right avay Hit Katrine. Oh, der shoy dot filled mine house Then dot goot oldt l ooter Krauss Brought us “Leodle Yawcob StriUM,* Shveet und clean; Thy, I dou’t palief mine eyes Then I look, now, mu surbrisa, Ou dot feller, shust der size Off Katrine! Den “dot leedle babe off mine,” He vas grown so toll und flue— bbust so sdrait as any pine You efer seen; Und der beoples all agreo Sooch line poys dey nefer see. (Dey looks much more like me * Ab Katrine.) Veil, ve haf our criefs und shoys, Und dhere’s naught our lofe destroys, Bud I miss dose leedle poys , Dot used to been; Und der tears vill somedimes sdart, Und I feels so sick at heart, Vuen I dinks I soon musd pari From Katrine. Oldt Time vill soon pe here, Mit his sickle, und his shpear, Und vill vhisper in mine ear Mit sober mien: “ You musd coom along mit me, F/r id vas der Lord’s decree; . Und von day dose poya you’ll see Und Katrine.” Lightning's Work. TWO FAMILIES DESTROYED. (From tlce North Texan.] On Friday, the Bth inst, Mr. Thomas Hale, living near Halesboro, in Red river county, was standing in front of his fire-place with his little child in his arms. Suddenly a flash of lightning came, and be was knocxed down, and he and his little one both fell into the fire. His wife, who was standing near, was also stunned, at the same time, but, partially re covering, she dragged them out of the fire. Her husband was dead, aud her little one, though not dead, suffering. Its clothes were burned off, and it was fatally hurt. On the sama day, at six o’clock P. M., and about a mile from Mr. Hale’s, Mr. Webster I aud his family were sitting in his house in converse L tion. His wife was leaning against him. * Under hia > chair was a cat, and still under the floor beneath > him was a hen with her brood. He was struck by : the lightning and instantly killed, as woro also the , cat. hen aud her brood. Mre. Webstar escaped nu- U.JMWtr'T NEW YORK DISPATCH, MARCH 31, 1878. - GOAT PLASTER. 3 THE MOST ASTOUNDING AND APPALLING IN r VENTION OF MODERN TIMES. (From t7is Virginia, Nev., Enterprise.) f Said he: “You may not remember me, but I’m an old settler on the Comstock.” He was an alert-looking little old man with shriv eled clothes aud shriveled face, but a bright and keen black eye. He was restless and jerky in man t ner. He talked with a sort of snap, and the move ments of his head, body and limbs were jerky and artificial, and caused one to think he was filled up inside with springs, wheels and other machinery, like some of the toys they make now-a-days. 5 Said We: “ Your face looks familiar, but—” 1 “No, you don’t know me. I know you don’t by the way you commence. But no matter—l know 1 you. My name is Thompson; Thompson with a ‘p’ —ha! ha ! with a ‘p’—Joshua Thompson. I live up - on North Summit street—way up to’ards the big Ophir water tank svith a *t’—a *t,’ ha! hi! I’ve got a little invention—invention with a *v,’ with a *v,’ ha! ha!” “You’re an •overwinder,’ are you, sir—an over l winder with a ‘w,’ with a ‘we,’ eh ?” “Me! me, sir? Me an overwinder? I scorn tho imputation, sir, though I don’t know what you mean. lam nothing to which you could attach the ’ prefix‘over,’let it be ‘ winder,’ ‘actor,’ ‘charger,’ 4 thrower,’ ‘ doser,’ or what not.” “To business, then. What is your invention?” i “Yes, that’s business. I like that. Business with a •b.’ Well, I’m me inventor of a goat plas ter.” “A court plaster?” ) “Court plaster be d—d! with a «d’—with a pair of‘ds,” and blistered with cantharides! No, a goat plaster—goat with a ‘g* and plaster with a *p.’ d’ye see?” “Goat plaster! What, in the name of all that’s bearded, is a goat plaster? What is the matter with the goats ?” “Use my plaster for the goats and you will say : •What is the matter of the goats ?’—everybody will say: ‘What is the matter of the goats?’ Ha, ha I matter—matter with an ‘ml’ ” “Is the plaster good for sick goats ?” “Sick goats! Did you ever see a sick goat? Did anyone ever see, ever hear of a sick goat ?” “No.” “No; boldly, nobly, truthfully said! My inven tion performs the miracle—shows you a sick goat—a more, than sick goat. Now, I want you to speak a good word for my invention—for my goat plaster. There’s big money in it. I’ll make it all right with i you. Everybody will try it, everybody will buy it— everybody must have it!” “But I don’t know what it’a like; beside, every body don’t keep goats, so everybody will not want the plaster.” “Ahl I see you are up to the trick of the thing ■ to the utility of the invention. The goat plaster is not a thing for the mean and meager minority who keep goats. The goat plaster is an invention that comes home to the business and bosoms of such as don’t keep goats. They’re the ones will buy it; they’re the ones will try it, while the others will decry it!” •‘What, is it a poison?” “ Pizen—pizen with an «s;’ pizen with a ‘ z,’ once you have tried it you will see!” “ But how do you apply it to the goats ?” “Apply it to the goats! You don’t; you apply it to the trees—to the trees that wave in the breeze.” “Ah! I see. The plaster is to prevent the goats from gnawing the bark off and killing the shade trees of the town?” “ Exactly, your head is level, level as the devil— level with an «!,’ devil with a ‘d.’ ” “But, will the goats eat the plaster?” “If they don’t eat it the tree is safe; if they do they are dead—dead and minus a head; the plaster beats cold lead.” “If you please set my mind at ease, as regards the plaster, the goats and the trees, out your ‘ds,’ your ‘ls’ and your ‘vs.’ ” •« Well, to business—business with a ” “None o’ that!” “The plaster is a mixture of giant powder, pitch and sand—sharp sand. Tne pitch makes it stick to the tree, don’t you see, and the sand, as you fore bode, makes it explode. It worse—l’ve tried. A nibble; two grains of sand grate together; bang! dead goat.” “Sure?” “Sure pop—pop with a ‘p.’ Millions of goats up my way. I took a pole, tied a bunch of evergreens at top;, big goat saw me plant it; thought it was tree; put plaster on pole and retired; goat came; one nibble; head blown hundred feet high; pole shivered to atoms—good-by biily! that was the mysterious explosion heard last Sunday morning. Everybody thought boiler had busted. Ha, ha! the goat plaster I” J “But you destroy your tree ?” “But you kill your goat! For every tree you fetch your goat. Who wouldn’t sacrifice a tree to slaughter a goat ? You just tell the folks about the goat plaster—tell ’em what it is and they’ll buy it. Vengeance, with a ‘ v ’—blood with a • b ’—goats to the devil, with a • d.’ They’ll all try it. They’ll all buy it!” BORN IN A PRISON. “ THE LUCK OF ROARING CAMP ” REPEATED IN CHICAGO. (From theJJhicago Inter-Ocean, March 28.) The boys around the Armory Station tread lightly about the place just now. If any one who doesn’t know what has happened enters noisily, a finger is laid upon a lip, and the new comer is bidden < “hush.” The_prisoner who likes to amuse him or herself by keeping the whole neighborhood awake : with yells, is silenced ohstrenerous, < by some means known only to tne force. Wtie'ii a platoon changes off it is done much more quietly than of yore, and the incoming squad, when they sit down iu a circle to smoke a pipe and exchange j ideas before “turning in,” don’t laugh quite so loudly when any one of the number gets off au un usually good thing. This is very creditable to the ! boya. ; What Bret Harte so touchingly described in c “Roaring Camp” has happened at the Armory. 8 “The Luck” has come to it. Within the grim old 6 building a child was bora yesterday morning, the ( first, bo far as known, and mother and babe will be 8 sheltered there for some days yet. Poor little mother! she is only 19 years old, and does not look 8 as if she had known the inside of many jails. It is a case of mystery, aud one of such a nature that no : important details can be learned regarding it. Offi- 1 eer James Kerwin is responsible for this importa- ' tion into the Armory. That is to say, Officer Kerwin took the unfortunate little mother there. He was traveling bis post on State street at 5 8 o’clock yesterday morning, and hearing some one moaning, proceeded to No. 343, and found a slight and fair-haired young woman sitting by the road side in great pain. Perceiving the poor thing’s sit uation he pushed open the door of No. 348, and, lay ing her gently down inside, ran off and returned i with Dr. Hildebrandt. That gentleman said that t what was going to be done must be done very quick ly. These was no time to get to the County Hospi- j tai, he said, and a back being summoned, the charge ( was hastily removed to the Armory, and made as , comfortable as circumstances would permit in one £ of toe witness-rooms, and there, within au hour, a j girl babe saw the light of day through iron barred i doors and grated windows. ( The young woman just managed to say that her | name was Mary Dansbury, that her husband was in j England, and that she had arrived from St. Louis ( tae night previous. When found by Officer Kerwiu ( she had just descended from a street car, but whe- | ther she had escaped from some house or been wan- > dering about all night is not yet known. Little j mother and little stranger ere both in charge of one ’ of the female prisoners, and the bulletin at mid- ] anight from Lockup Maloney was, “Mother and child ‘d'Oing well.” • A JEWEL OF A WIFE. THE WOMAN THAT WOULDN’T QUARREL UN DER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. She was one of those women you couldn’t quarrel 1 with. Sue was that agreeable that her eld man got tired of it, and tried to have a row for a change. He began by chucking the things about at dinner time, and smashing the plates. But she only smiled like an angel and said: “Law, ducky; how lucky I didn’t put the best service on to-day.” Aud the next day she did put the best service on, and he remembered it had cost him ninety dollars, und he did not care to spoil the set. Then he took 1 to stopping out late and coming home drunk, but ' when he staggered up stairs she welcomed him with . a smile, and caught him in her arms and kissed him, 1 and ' “I wonder, John, dear, whatever’s been spilt on ' your coat; it smells Now this was enougn to make any man wild. So one evening he said to her quietly: “Ishmc, myluvsh; I’m toshicatad!” “Are you, John?” she replied; “why, you old dear, 1 shouldn’t have believed it.” And then she gave him a sweet smile that made him that mad he didn’t know what to do. But he wasn’t going to be outdone; he determined he would have a row somehow or other. So oue night, when she wouldn’t believe he was drunk, but kept on kiss ing him and calling him an old dear, he just let out some s.rong language and bit her on the head with the fire-iron. She smiled, but she didn’t say any thing in particular. She took him by the hand in an affectionate manner, and led hint down stairs into the street, and kissed him, and'handed him over to a policeman. And she went down to the court the next morning and got him six months in such a pretty agreeable way, the reporters fell quite in love with her. And when he was going away she leaned over the dock aud kissed him, and said: “Take care of yourself, ducky; I’ll have a nice dinner tor you the day you come out.” And the last thing he saw as he went down the steps was his amiable wife kissing her hand to him and smiling away as sweetly as ever. Death in the Snow. A MOTHER AND HER BABES FR OZEN. The Denver (Col.) News says: Mr-i. Hardin, living near Bijou Basin, had been left alone with her two children just before the recent storm came on. Mr. Hardin, her husband, was called away, not thinking that on bis return be would find himielf robbed of his wife and children by the dread storm king. The • snow drifted aud the wind howled about the house, where the family were sheltered. There were little or no provisions in the house, and the fire was dying out. To add to this the sup ply of matches had given out and ah the efforts of the mother to infuse life into the dying embers in the stove proved fruitless. The snow fell through the chimney and smother ed the fire, and after an hour’s effort to keep herself and the children warm the mother, growing dis* traded brooding over the possible result oi the storm and wondering at her husband’s long ab sence, gathered her children in her arms and ven tured out into the storm, intending to make an ef fort to reach the house of her father-in-law, which was three miles distant. The struggles of the he roic mother will never be known, for the next day her lifeless body was found buried in the snow, clasping in its cold, deadly embrace the forms of the two children who bad shared her fate. The unfor tunate ones must have become blinded by the fast falling snow, and overcome by the bitter cold wiud and sat down to rise no more. Our College Boys. ’ IT LOOKS AS THOUGH THIS IS WHAT WE ABE , COMING TO. > (From the Utica Observer.) i •* This man,” said the warden, pausing before the , door of cell No. 89, “ was seat here for a most brutal . assault on two freshmen at Princeton, where he was • a sophomore. He is one of the worst characters in ; the prison. The cell adjoining is occupied by a man ; who was a sophomore at Yale. He attempted to . poison the entire freshman class ; all but seven were j saved by antidotes. He is in for life. We are obliged . to keep him heavily ironed. The next cell. No. 95, con i tains a Harvard sophomore, sent up for fourteen i years, for putting out the eyes of a irashman with a r red hot iron. These prisoners here, having their i heads shaved, arrived from Amherst this morning ; , it is the party of students that burned the college *" ■jarrej aud feathered the president last month,’ • - THE FUNNY THINGS THAT SORELY-BADGERED WITNESSES HAVE SAID. (From AU th& Year Round.) 1 In a trial at Winchester a witness failing to make his vei’sion of a conversation intelligible by,reason of his fondness for “says I” and “says he,” was taken in hand by Baron Martin, with the following ‘ result: “ My man, tell us now exactly what passed.” “Yes, my lord. I said I would not have the pig.” “And what was his answer?” “ He said he had been keeping it for me, and that he ” “No, no, he could not have said that; he spoke in the first person.” “No, my lord, I was the first person that spoke.” “I mean, don’t bring in the third person; repeat his exact words.” “There was no third person, my lord, only him and me.” “My good fellow, he did not say he’d been keep ing the pig; he said, ‘l’ve beau keeping it.’ ” “ 1 assure you, my lord, there was no mention of your lordship at all. We are on different stories. There was no third person there, aod if anything had been said about your lordship, I mu st have heard, it.” The baron gave in. Lord Mansfield once came off second best in en deavoring to make a witness use intelligible lan guage. The man had deposed that ho had not suf fered any loss at the defendant’s hands because he was up to him. “ What do you mean by being up to him ?” asked bis lordship. “Moan, my lord ? Why I was down upon him.” “Down upon him?” repeated the j udge interro gatively. “Yes, my lord; deep as he thought himself, I stagged him.” “Really,” said his lordship, “I do not understand this sort of language.” “Not understand it!” exclaimed this unabashed adept in slang; “Not understand it! lord, what a flat you must oe!” A Jew, speaking of a young man as his son-in-law, was accused of misleading the court, since tho young man was really his son. Moses, however, per sisted that the name he put to the ’relationship was the right one, and, addressing the bench, said: “I was in Amsterdam two years and three-quar ters; when I comes home I finds this iad. Now, tho law obliges me to maintain him, and, consequently, he is my son-in-law.” “Well,” said Lord Mansfield, “that is the best definition of a son-in-law I ever yet heard.” THE SAMPHIRE PLANT. ITS ENCOURAGEMENT TO SHIPWRECKED MEN. During a violent storm in November, 1821, a ves sel passing through the English Channel was driven ashore near Beacny Head, aud the whole crew were washed overboard, four only being saved from im mediate death by being thrown on the rocks ou which the vessel struck. A lingering and terrible late seemed, to await them; for, although not under water, the waves appeared to be rapidly gaining on them. The darkness of the night and the violence of the storm prevented any help coming to them, aud they eat awaiting the waves which roared around to engulf them at last, as they had their shipmates before. Iu this terrible moment one oi the sufferers, grasping a weed to hold himself more firmly on the rock, at once recognized it as the samphire, and, knowing that the samuhire is never submerged by the sea, he felt assured'that ho could say to the waves, “Thus far shall you go, and no farther.” Trusting to the promise of this child of faith, the poor fellows remained stationary till the raerning. They were not deceived; the sea, having reached its bounds, gradually retired, light broke ou the shipwrecked seamen, and they were rescued irom their perilous position, having, no doubt, a grateful remcmberance of the cheering, hope-giving words suggested by the root of samphire in their dire necessity. This plant is still cultivated in England for the purposes of tbe dyer; not actually to give the blue color for which it was faffious ages ago, but to form a base or mordant for a black dye. It is cultivated m Lancashire, principally by persons who devote tuemseives to the crop; and, as it is a very exhaust ive one. the cultivators rarely taking more th in two crops off the same ground, they are obliged to wan der further afield in search of new pastures. Tho best kind of woad is worth SIOO a ton. Consecrated Oil. ITS WONDERFUL POWERS ON A HORSE. The .Salt Lake Tribune has now and then a tough one. Read the following, especially the last para graph: At a Mormon prayer meeting, held in the Twelfth Ward school-house, an old Mormon, who Lad just come to this country from Eagland, re lated the following very startling story which, if true, is proof positive that consecrated olive oil pos sesses remarkable curative powers: “When I was iniEngland,” said he, “I had on my iarm a horse that “was very sick, and which I very much feared I should lose; but one night I dreamed that an Elder came to me and said, ‘Brother, if you will administer to your horse in a proper spirit, kid anoint it with consecrated oil, it will recover.’ So that morning, and for three subsequent mornings, I regularly anointed the sick animal and prayed that it might be restored to health; and I assure you, my brethren and sisters, that on the third day he was so improved that he ate heartily, aud on the day following, I worked him oa the plow.” And now. when the old polygs want to work their sick women on the plow, they all anoint them with consecrated - A Practical Joker. HE DIDN’T FIND WHEIS THE LAUGH CAME IN The Eureka (Nev.) Sentinel tells how a marrie I man of Eureka tried to play a practical joke upon his wife by hiding under the bed, ala burglar. As she approached the bedside, he protruded his head and coughed to attract her attention, iu which he succeeded admirably. She saw him, but evidently did not recognize him, for she flung the lamp clear across the room, and went off into raging hysterics. The oil caught on fire and blazed up to the ceiling, and the practical joker scrambled out, seized the blankets, and went to work manfully to suppress the raging conflagration. He finally quelled it, but not until he had burned his nands, rained SSO worth of blankets, and utterly spoiled tbe carpet. Then, and not till then, he turned his attention to the woman, and with the application of salts and smelling-bottle, brought her back to her senses. The Hard Times. CAUSE: EXTRAVAGANCE—CURE: ECONOMY. Colorado papjrs print a letter from Hon. James B. Beliord on the financial question, which closes thus: - — ’•‘And now, in conclusion, permit me to eay that the disease of this nation to-day is its vast in debtedness; its indebtedness growing out of the war; its indebtedness incurred bv wild speculations and unprofitable ventures; its indebtedness born of the fever of extravagance for foreign silks, velvets, laces, and gewgaws; its indebtedness incurred in constructing railroads managed adversely to the in terests of those who paid for their construction; its indebtedness contracted in erecting gorgeous church temples where religion has every grace ex cept the heart. For this disease experience can suggest but one cure—industry, economy aud time. This cure disregarded, the fever aud delirium will increase until universal bankruptcy overtakes us all. This euro applied, tne recovery, though slow, will be absolutely certain.” That Terrible Scourge, Fever and ague, and its congener, billious remit tent, beside affections of tho stomach, liver, and bowels, produced by miasmatic air and water, are both eradicated aud prevented, by the use of Hostetter’s Stomach Bitters, a purely vegetable elixir, indorsed by physicians, and more extensively used as a remedy lor the above class of disorders, as well as form any others, than any medicine of the age. A languid circulation, a torpid state of the liver, a want of vital stamina, are conditions pecu liarly favorable to malarial diseases. They are, however, surely remdied by the great Preventive, which, by invigorating tho system and endowing it with regularity as well as vigor, provides it with a resistant power which enables it to withstand disor ders not only of a malarial type, but a host of others to which feeble and ill-regulated systems are sub ject. The Bitters are a safe as well as searching eradicant, and have widely superseded that danger ous drug, quinine, which palfotes but does not »ndio»te malaria. - - HnMMiW-Hiii.T,i»iilwnMi > r'.yirirrrwMiiMrMiTOwtmom x>xe:i>. THOMSON.—At Almont, Lapeer county, Mich., March 15, arredSl, on the anniversary ot her fifty-sixth marriage day, Margaret, wife of Dugald Thomson, of Paisley, Scotland J FIRb¥^ASTER~DA~WN— Splendid Oil Picture, and other rare attractions for April Demo rest’s Monthly Magazine. 25c. Post-free. Yearly, $3. 17 E. 14th st., N. Y. THE TAILOR, 14.5 BO WJIRY, t ’ PANTS TO ORDEH, THREE TO TEN DOLLARS. SUITS TOT ORDER, TWELVE TO FORTY DOLLARS. Spring Overcoats to Order, FROM TWELVE DOLLARS. ASK YOUR GROCER FOR Hl 0Q! H S’ GERMAN LATODBY SOAP. THE BEST ITV USE. ■■UBiii'nwMiwnua'iwiiiii iiiKirisgßmiaaaaagraMmßißHmi gjtoinj goofs;. BEST ROOFINGi Old Roofs of all kinds Repaired AND COATED WITH Thick Plastic-Slate Roof Coating, AT IM CENTS SQUARE FOOT UPWARD, with RESPONSIBLE GUARANTEE for one to tea years. Refer to K. HOE & Co., JOHN ROACH & SON, HAR PER BROS,, and 3,000 ROOFS iroai one to fifteen years old. Estimates gladly inode flee. PLASTIC-SLATE ROOF CO., No. 79 MAIDEN LANE, NEW YORK, and No. 16 COURT STREET, BROOKLYN. | Van Orden’s Plastic-Slate Roof Coating sixty cent* per ’ ailim. with Oixcpttowk D A Splendid Opportunity to Win a For tune. April 9th, at New Orleans.—Grand Distribution LOUISIANA STATE LOTTERY COMPANY: 1,857 prizes, amounting to $110,400; capital prizes, $30,000, SIO,OOO, ® $5,000, «fcc.; 100,OCX) tickets, two dollars ($2); halves, one u dollar (sl.) Corresponding agents for sale of tickets at ,3 highly remunerative compensation wanted at all points, j AU our Grand Extraordinary Drawings are under the supervision and management of Gens. G. T. BEAURE GARD and JUBAL A. EARLY. Address M. A. DAU » FHIN, Post Office Box 692, New Orleans, La., or H. L. PLUM, No. 317 Broadway, New York. t Post-Bffice Notice.—The Foreign Mails for the week endins Saturday, April 6th. 1873, will close 1 at this office on Tuesday, at 2:00 P. M., for Europe, by steamship Idaho, via Queenstown; on Wednesday, at , 4:00 A. M., for France direct, by steamship Canada, via Havre; and at 1 P. M. for Europe, by steamship Abys 1 synia, via Queenstown; on Thursday, at 4:00 A. M., for Ireland direct, by steamship City of Brussels via Queens- 1 town (correspondence for Great Britain and the Conti nent to be forwarded by this steamer must be specially . addressed); and at 12:00 M., for Europe, by steamship Frisia, via Plymouth, Cherbourg, and Hamburg; on Saturday ? at 4:00 A. M., for Europe, by steamship Ger i manic, via Queenstown (correspondence for Germany and . Scotland, to be forwarded by this steamer, must be spe r cially addressed); and at 4:30 A. M., for Scotland direct, j by steamship Devonia, via Glasgow; and at 11:30 A. M., for Europe, by steamship Gen. Werder, via Southampton and Bremen. The steamships Idaho, Abyssinia and Germanic do not - take mails for Denmark, Sweden, and Norway. The mails lor Hayti and Kingston, Ja., leave New York , April 4th. . The mails for Nassau, N. P., leave New York April 6th. The mails for the West Indies, via St. Thomas, also . Porto Rico and Venezuela direct* leave New York April L 6th. The mails for China and Japan leave San Francisco Apm 16th # . The mails for Australia, etc., leave San Francisco April 15tb. THOS. L. JAMES. Postmaster. Post-Officb, New York. March 30th, 1878. BARNUM’S GRAND OPENING. P. T. BARNUM’S OWN AND ONLY > GREVI’EST SHOW ON EARTH, WILL OPEN IN NEW YORK I SATURDAY AFTERNOON, APRIL 5, SATURDAY AFTERNOON, APRIL 6, SATURDAY AFTERNOON, APRIL 6. and continue Every Afternoon and Evening, FOR TWO WEEKS ONLY, AT AMERICAN INSTITUTE, AT AMERICAN INSTITUTE, AT AMERICAN INSTITUTE, third avenue and sixty-third street. THE GRANDEST STREET PAGEANT EVER SEEN, THE GRANDEST SIREET PAGEANT EVER SEEN, THE GRANDEST STREET PAGEANT EVER SEEN, will pass through principal streets and avenues on .FRIDAY AFTERNOON, APRIL, Otb, Of wnich, in additional to many other novelties, PVr. BARNUM’S SCHOOL OF TWENTY IMPORTED ROYAL TRAINED STALLIONS, will form A PRINCIPAL FEATURE. Remember day of opening, SATURDAY, APRIL 6. Do not mistake the location. AMERICAN INSTITUTE BUILDING. PROCESSION FRIDAY AFTERNOON. BOOTH’S THEATRE. THE EXILES. Messrs. Tompkins &Hi 11..... .Lessees and Managers. (Also Proprietors of tue Boston Theatre.) TUESDAY EVENING, APRIL 9th, GRAND INAUGURATION of SARDOU’S ONLY ORIGINAL VERSION, adapted by L, R. SHEWEIsL, Esq., of THE BOOTH’S THEATRE. EXILES. BOOTH’S THEATRE. BOOTH’S THEATRE. EXILES. BOOTH’S THEATRE. BOOTH S THEATRE. EXILES. BOOTH’S THEATRE. EXILES. EXILES. EXILES. BOOTH’S THEATRE. EXILES. BOOTH’S THEATRE. BOOTH’S THEATRE. EXILES, BOOTH’S THEATRE. BOOTH’S THEATRE. EXILES. BOOTH’S THEATRE. EXILES. EXILES. EXILES. BOOTH’S THEATRE. EXILES. BOOTH’S THEATRE. BOOTH’S THEATRE. EXILES. BOOTH’S THEATRE. BOOTH’S THEATRE. EXILES. BOOTH’S THEATRE. EXILES. EXILES. To be produced upon a scale of magnificence never be fore attempted. XKv- POPULAR PRICES. Sale of seats commences Thursday morning, April 4th, at Butler’s Eclectic Library, No. 33 Union Square. PARK THEATBR BROADWAY. HENRY E. ABBEYLessee and Manager Mr. Abbey regrets to announce that the remarkably successful engagement of tbe comedians, Messrs. ROBSON AND CRANE, already extended BEYOND THE ORIGINAL LIMIT, must of necessity terminate THIS WEEK, in order that they may fulfil contracts previously made by him for their joint appearance in neighboring cities. FOR THE FAREWELL WEEK ROBSON AND CRANE WILL SING pleasantly to their patrons, - - INTRODUCING FAVORITE DUETTS. FRIDAY EVENING, APRIL 5, JOINT FAREWELL BENEFIT to these favorite -‘comique’s.” SATURDAY at 2 o’clock, seventh aud positively the last MatL.ee. SATURDAY EVENING, last appearance this season of “OUR BACHELORS.” rjpONY PASTOR’S. TONY PASTOR’S. The Best Company ever presented in New York. CELLINI’S GRAND ITALIAN BALLET TROUPE. MLLE. LOVALETTA, Premiere. Great success and re-eagagement ot GEORGINA SMITHSON, the famous English character vocalist. JOHN and MAGGIE FIELDING, KITTY C’NEIL, MA(. KIN and WILSON CONWAY and KERRIGAN, CARDELLO and VICTORELLI, SAM DEARIN, JENNIE HUGHES, IDA DE CORT, BILLY BARRY, TONY PASTOR and all of his FAMOUS TROUPE. MATINEES TUESDAY AND FRIDAY. lELLEi’WOKIsT TWENTY-FOURTH ST., NEXT FIFTH AVE. HOTEL. AN ENTIRELY NEW PROGRAMME MONDAY EVENING. APRIL Ist. SIX CHOICE NECROMANTIC WONDERS. PART 2. A STRANGE STORY. Being a re-lie-able History of BLUEBEARD. Eis Adventures, Misfortunes and Rascalities, and how he treated his wife FATIMA, (with cut«). Related Verbally, Musically and Pictorially by KOBER i HELLER. Evening at 8. Matinee Wednesday and Saturday at 2. Children half price to Matinee. W£ST SIDE THEATRE, cor. West 12tb street and .Greenwich avenue. skSuBL Rylh'?‘ NS ’ | Proprietors .nd Managers. GRAND OPENING MONDAY. APRIL Ist. Every evening and two matinees (Wednesday and Sat urday), the world’s greatest effort at a proper production of the touching moral and religious drama. SUPERB NEW SCENERY, OLD TIME MUSIC, 100 COLORED PEOPLE, 50 GEORGIA JUBILEE SINGERS. UNCLE TOM’S CABIN 1 UNCLE TOM’S CABIN! UNCLE TOM’S CABIN 1 RESERVED ORCHESTRA CHAIRS, 50 CENTS. REBKRVEO ORCHESTRA CHAIRS. 50 CENTS. The drama, with its marvelous features, together with the Celebrated Colored Georgia Jubilee Singers, will be given every evening this week and Wednesday and Satur day afternoons at 2 o’clock. OWERY THEATRE. LISPET. Monday, April 1, Every Evening and Wednesday aud Saturday Mutineer first production in New York oi Leonard Grover’s Powerful Romantic Drama, THE REMARKABLE HISfuKZ OF “LISPET ” Presented with New Scenery and Appointments, and an Extraordinary Cast, comprising MISS FRANCES KEMBLEasLISPET Mis > Virginia Buchanan, Miss Minnie Gray, Miss Adelaide Thornton. Miss Nellie Fielding, Mr. Alexander Fitzgerald (His first appearance here), Master Edwin Byron, the celebrated Juvenile Tragedian and Character Actor, Mr. G. W. Ketchum, Mr. W. H. Lytell, Mr. J. W. Randall, etc. EW PARK THEATRE, BROOKLYN. Every Night and Wednesday and Saturday Matinees. MAGGIE MOORE and J. C. WILLIAMSON. STRUCK OIL and THE CHINESE QUESTION. STRUCK OIL WILL BE PRESENTED WITH THE ORIGINAL SCENERY AND COMPANY FROM THE UNION SQUARE THEATRE, NEW YORK CITY. W~ ALLACK’S. EVERY EVENING and SATURDAY MATINEE, will be presented a new play, in four acts, entitled DIPLOMACY, The east of which will Include Mr. LESTER WALL ACK, Messrs. H. J. MONTAGUE, FRED. ROBINSON. W. R. FLOYD, J. W. Shannon, W J. Leonard, C. E. Eawin, W. A. Eytinge, Miss Rose Cogblan, Miss Maude Granger, Mme. Ponisi, Miss Sara Stevens, Miss Pearl Eytinge. STANDARD THEATRE. Broadway and Thirty-third ’street. W. HENDERSONLessee aud Manager, immense success ot the favorite, MAGGIE MITCHELL, in FANCHON! EVERY EVENING and SATURDAY MATINEE at I:3ft Supported by WM. HARRIS as LANDRY, also Messrs. Bassett, Levick, Scott, Fuller, Holmes, Misses Mary Wells, Marie Prescott and Carlotta Evelyn. NIBLO’S garden. A RESERVED SEAT FOR FIFTY CENTS. Second week of the thrilling Irish drama, THE CRAIG A DHOUL, THE APPARITION OF THE CRAIGA DHOUL. THE MASKED BALL. THE MYSTERIOUS MASK. THE SECRET OF THE CRAIGA SHIELD. To commence with the roaring farce, “COUSIN JOE.” MATINEES WEDNESDAY AND SATURDAY at 2. Doors open at 7P. M. Carriages at 10:40 P. M. GYPTIAN HALL, 34th st. and 3d ave. SOMETHING NEW, the rich, spicy, French sen sation TEMPTATION, with new music, wardrobe and scenery. 101 beautifully formed young ladies. The French Mmuett. The Jardin Mabille Dancers. New ele gant Dissolving Statues by the most beautiful models in America. Grand Amazon marches. Remember this is the only first-class Sensational Theatre in the country. Every evening at 8. Matinees Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays at 2. SAN FRANCISCO MINSTRELS’OPERA HOUSE.—THE FAMILY RESORT. GREAT SUCCESS OF BOBBY NEWCOMB. REVIVAL OF THE ROARING PIECE, THE FUNNY BABIES. THE TWO DROMIOS. ALABAMA HOME. LITTLE CHERRY BLOSSOM. GLORIOUS SOLO and PART SINGING. SEATS SECURED.MATINEE SATURDAY, at 2. rpHEATRE COMIQUE, No. 514 Broadway a HARRIGAN A HARTProprietors M. W. HANLEY Manager HARRIGAN <fc HART in Edward HARRIGAN’S burlesque, A CELEBRATED HARD CASE. » Foley & Sheffer, I MATINEES I The Kayes, Mollie Wilson, WEDNESDAY, | James Messenger, > The Springers, i SATURDAY, | Williams & Sullivan. Tom Rogers, I AT 2. | Carroll Family. Will Morton, John Wild, Billy Gray, Johnny Shay. " mHE BUCKINGHAM PALACE. (Twenty-seventh street, near Sixth avenue.) THE AMERICAN JARDIN MABILLE. PARIS BY NIGHT. ELITE SOCIABLES EVERY EVENING. THREE GRAND PARLORS. OPERA BOUFFE MUSIC. GRAND FANCY DRESS BALL Will be given THURSDAY, APRIL 11th. Imported Orders of Dancing, of exquisite design, w ill be presented to each lady in attendance. - FREE! FREE! FREE! script!ve Catalogue of Novels, Song Books, Music, Negro Farces, Acting Plays, Letter Writers, Fortune Tellers, Re citers, Cook Books, Speakers, Dialogues, Joke Books, T Ready Reckoners, Playing Cards, Books on Magic, Ven triloquism, Swimming, Boxing, Draughts, Cricket, Base Ball; Clog Shoes, Burnt Cork, Wigs, Face Preparations, T uneoualed and unattainable elsewhere. Mailed free upon J appUciUJou to C. X. DE WITT, Publilber. 35 ikfid st.. AY, '■ 5; THE GREAT LONDON SHOW I a SANGER’S BRITISH MENAGERIE, Lt DOCKRILL’S PARISIAN CIRCUS, ’• .5 W OREN! NOW OPEN! a THE GREATEST OF ALL GREAT SHOWS! — ™ E CROWNED MAMMOTH OF MAMMOTHS! / v>? x V; r , c?s . unnn ' ,nons in pronouncing this the «• . GRANDEST combination that ever appeared iu the Metropolis, bo matter what the title of opposl - tion. s M MME. KLISE dockrtll, e SUPREME EMPRESS OF THE ARENA. 7 . JAMES ROBINSON, ,t rr-TT t ?F npion Male Bareback Rider Of the World. WILLIAM GORMAN. PAULINE LEE. ! , THE KENNEBELS. r JOHNNY PATJERSON. THIS RIDING MONKEY. LIVINGSTON BROS. AND MUIITZ. MLLE. JOSEPHINE. W. HINES, y PRANK GARDNER. ’ 5001 OTHERS EQUALLY RENOWNED. 1 THE FIVE PERFORMING ELEPHANTS. . A monster menagerie. j SIUO.OJJ m cash to any Showman in the world who can .. orguntse an Exhibition to compare with this! MATINEES. TUESDAY, THURSDAY AND SATURDAY. . EVERY EVENING AT 8 O’CLOCK. 1 Children'half p nd 23 ceuts: Keserved teats, 75 cents; ‘ £4 RAND OPERA HOUSE. i v-Jf Poole <fc Donnelly Lessees and Managers J«A rved Sea t s {Orchestra Circle and Balcony), 50c. May be Eecured ten days m advance. Box Office open a dauy from 9A.M.t010 P. M. J GRAND ENGLISH OPERA GRAND ENGLISH OPERA ) AT OUR USUAL POPULAR PRICES. An engagement having been effected with > RUBEN’S ENGLISH OPERA COMPANY, Balfe’s romantic spectacular opera, . THE BOHEMIAN GIRL, presented tor the first time in America in its original en ’ tirety, new scenery, costumes, and mise-en-Ecene, and an orchestra of 32 soloists. T . TWELVE leading artists. Miss Louise Oliver, Miss Sallie Reber, V. rs - Ann a Granger Dow, >1 iss Adelaide Randall, Mr. Eugene Clarke, Mr. A. E. Stoddard, Mr. Vincent Hogan, Mr. Charles Lang, Mr. Stanley Felch, Mr. James A. Montgomery, A,r ; Miss Came Burton. A CHORUS OF 50 YOUNG AND FRESH VOICES. , Grand ballet led by MLLES. AUGUSTA SOHLKE and ADELE PAGLIERE. MATINEES WEDNESDAY and SATURDAY. THIS (SUNDAY) EVENING, . GRAND TWENTY-FIVE CENT CONCERT. . > DOWNING’S NINTH REGIMENT BAND. And a host of VOCAL and INSTRUMENTAL SOLOISTS IJNION SQUARE THEATRE. Vronriator. Mr. SHERIDAN SHOOK Manager Mr. a. m _ pALMBIi 70th to Begins promptly at 8. 77th OVERWHELMING SUCCESS OF Performance THE GREAT EMOTIONAL PLAY, , „,of A CELEBRATED CASE. ACelebrated THE HOUSE IS CROWDED AT EVERY Case. PERFORMANCE. SATURDAY, at 1:30, TWELFTH MATINEE OF „„ A CELEBRATED CASE. SEATS SECURED TEN DAYS IN ADVANCE. "BOOTH'S THEATRE. LAST WEEK GRAND ITALIAN OPERA “ < ?‘i. DAY -FAUST. KELLOGG. AT®fSDAY — MIGNO.n. Kellogg, Eoze, Cary. WEDNESDAY—AIDA. Rote, Cary, Frapolli. THURSDAY-MARTHA. Kellogg, Cary. FRlDAY—Benefit ol Mies (Tara Louise Kellogg. Ist Act, TRAVIATA 2d Act, MIGNON. <th Act, HUGUENOTS. MAD SCENE IN HAMLBT.fi? MATINEE—TROVATORE. Mlle. Marie Roza. Fifth avenue theatre. " EVERY EVENING AT 8. , Magnificent Revival of UNCLE TOM’S CABIN. WEDNESDAY With AND MR. AND MPS. G. C. HOWARD, VTR BATURDAY, GINIA JUBILEE SINGERS, GREAT AT 1:30. SOUTHERN SPECIALISTS, NEW GOR OVER AT 4. GEO US SCENERY. INROAD WAY THEATRE. Exites. .O LAST NIGHTS of the most successful play of the year, The EXILES, With its PICTURESQUE SCENES, SUPERB COSTUMES, And GREAT CART. MATINEE SATURDAY AT l:.0. POPULAR PRICES’. KiT£Ka?niEum>ssa:iuQrssi3sszsß3EixisißiSßssnEnKXififlnmMi3cs£acunmm gnj CONTINUATION OF THE GREAT SALE OP SILKS, AT Doyle & Adolphi’s, Nos. 267 and 269 GRAND St., Cor. Forsyth street, New York. THE FOLLOWING ADDITIONAL BARGAINS WILL BE OFFERED: 260 PIECES PLAIN COLORED GROS GRAIN SILK, twenty-four inches wide and VERY HEAVY, at $1 22 per yard; ACTUAL VALUE, $2 50. 300 PIECES PLAIN COLORED TAFFETAS, at 65c. per yard; WORTH 90c. 350 PIECES BLACK GROS GRAIN SILKS, at 70c. per yard, worth sl. 275 PIECES SATIN-FINISHED BLACK BILKS at $1 45, WORTH $1 85. THE ABOVE-NAMED SILKS are the GREATEST BAR GAINS ever offered. KID GLOVES. • 550 DOZEN LADIES’ KID GLOVES, slightly damaged, at 15c. per pair. 345 DOZEN CHILDRENS’ KID GLOVES, WARRANT ED REAL FRENCH KID, at 35c. per pair; WORTH 90c. dkess”"goods. In ADDITION to our LARGE and VARIED STOCK WE WILL SELL 5,000 piece? TROUVILLB SUITINGS, NEW DESIGN, at 15c. per yard, WORTH 25c. 225 pieces FIFTY-FOUR INCH WIDE CAMEL’S HAIR SUITING at 50c. per yard. OnWednesday &Thursday GRAND OPENING GF COSTUMES AND CLOAKS Of Our Own Importatioa and Manufacture. WE RESPECTFULLY INVITE PUBLIC ATTENTION. OOYLE M.BOLPHI, Nos. 267 and 269 Grand Street. CORNER FORSYTH STREET, NEW YORK. Paris Styles, 1878, IN SPRING COSTUMES. CARRIAGE AND STREET SUITS, WEDDING AND RECEPTION DRESSES, WRAPS, CAPES, MANTLES, &C. Also of their own Manufacture Arnold, Constable & Co., Broadway, corner 19th st. ESTCHESTER property, to LET—A fine large two-story and attic stone house containing twelve rooms, together with a good garden and live acres of ground. Possession Immediately. Also, J the two-story cottage adjoining, containing fourteen rooms, with good garden and six acres of ground. Pof l session April 1. Both well supplied with fruit and shade trees; excellent water: have been recently over hauled and painted: in complete order. Situated on the . road from West to Eastchester, aud one quarter of a mile from Timpson’s Depot, on the Harlem River and New Rochelle Railroad. Apply to W. .BY FIELD, No. 28 Centre, corner Reade street. TgTO LET. — Immediate Possession. Elc- JL gant residence, unfurnished, and spacious grounds in complete order. Barn, carriaare-house, and all other out-buildings. Gas, hot and cold water, at West New Brighton, Staten Island. For particulars, permit, etc., inquire at New York Dispatch office, No. 11 Frankfort r street. i qnaßMßaasaaWMMMMlffllHlfe'aWilMiWfflllllMMlWMMMtMßßai • ~~ W toilet RS. CONNELLY’S REDEMPTION positively restores grayest hair instantaneously to its original color, without lead, silver, sulphur, or stain ing the scalp. The ingredients to make twenty ounces, “ no trouble or expense in making, postpaid to any address on receipt of sl. Samples, 25 cents. Circulars free. A trial will-convince you. Letter postage-stamps taken as Oa iddl.BS. MRS. ANNA No. 27 Bond street, New York. timmSMBMMBMSBffWWWKRM KUS ilTlUgSMSSCPiiwrfuWfflßWSHßmcMjl burning. ITgrotF &cor KO. 11l EAST FOURTEENTH STREET, OFFOSITE ACADEMY OF MUSIC, NEW YORK. IURN E K 3 » AND ■ Dealers in Ivory, ’ IVORY FANS, PUFFBOXES, BRUSHES, MIRBJAS, , OPERA GLASSES, ETC., ETC. ’ AU, KINDS OF RBI*AHUNG DUNE kN IVORY AND • yuRTUISR SUJiM. MOBBELL’S “ ' FIRST-CLASS STtt.l6B WAREHOUSES, With Safe Deposit Vaults } AND il - Fire and Burglar-Proof Safes, (Built expressly tor the purpose), Nos. 102 to 126 East 32d street, Extending to Fourth ave., NEW YORK. , STORAGE FOR FURNITURE OF ALL KINDS, Pianos, Mirrors, Ornaments, Trunks, and Bag' gage; also Private Carriages, &c. „ attention given to expressing, moving, packing, , n ttr pL s A i J >pn ? ’’ e . lth ®V at warehouse or at other places, leaving the city will find every facility required ? for their accommodation at this establishment. B . ./Absolute Security FOR VALUABLES OF ALL KINDS. SAFES, of all sizes, TO RENT, by the Month or Year. l or S? fe ? e ?<> sit Dept. No. 475 4th avenue. A nvo!™" £<’ r , Warehouse Dept., No. IOS B. 32d street ARTICLES WILL BE RECEIVED FROM OR FOBWABDBD TO r £ NT PART of Eubopb or America E ? s and gentlemen are Invited to inspect the premises before engaging elsewhere. _____ (gxiww. ■ PWWFTffITO ME >?£A I 'v<t£?> d! ‘l Iy ’r S nTHI ,' ,ys excepted, from Pier No. 41 North Liver, foot of Car.nl street. Connecting with Ex press trains tor all points North and West. Freight taken ac low rates. T for at to® principal hotels and all of West- r, £ott Express offices m New York and Brooklyn, where baggage can be checked. Brooklyn passengers transferred n.-tj by Brooklyn Annex boats. Excursion tickets to Al buny and return (good 30 days), $2 50. 8. E. MAYO. Gen’l Passenger Agent. , ©o the guMir. T ° SUIT THE TIMES.- STROUB, No. 576 Grand street, corner Goerct The £ ,“ i 2VN ??yl l T < s ß! ?r MwseUs ,h 0 flni ‘ st Hauors.spo- R or IrLv. I d . for ra , n . I:se - at 6J cts - a bottle- All kinds ot drinks, hot or cold, six ceats a glass. &T 93 Canal st., between f W ri<1 se and Forsy th, would most respectfully in ak"<l public iu general that he has m<»de a great reduction in trie price of Oysters to suit the i btews » 15c.; Boasted and Fried, 25c.; Pickled Oysters, 50c. a quart. ’ * iiiiiiiijiiii) n i ~-~naTrnTiTrniT |B, i - iiiii - i "T , Tr , *TB , TTBCBtwMtt! ■, WOR SALE—ALL KINDS OF FANCY JI .Dogs, Birds, &c. Medicines for all diseases: Pre-- I’ are d Food for Mocking Birds, &c., at B. G. BOVEY’S. No. 3 Greene street, near Canal. V/ IO LIN TAUGHT AT A MODERATE V price; good references given. H, JAHN, 96 Av. C. Banjo taught by mail -s.ooo times, 10 cents each. Send stamp for circular. Dima Banjo Music Company, 205 Fulton street, Brooklyn, N. Y r ■ — — .. NICKLIN’S bazaar has removed to the corner of Pearl and Chatham sta., where the ■ best bargains can bo had of unredeemed pledges. THE GREAT PEARL-STREET RISSORT No. 453 PEARL STREET (near Chatham). . SILZDOKF & WITTIG s Invite all their friends and the readers of the Dispatch ■ tn visit their splendidly fit ted up WINE AND LAGEREIER SALOON. PILSNER BEER A SPECIALTY.' ' BULLY LAGER BEER’’ s -tn CAX BE BLVD AT POPULAR RESTAURANT AND WINE AND LAGER-BEER SALOON, CORNER OF PEARL AND WILLIAM STREETa IF YOU DON’T BELIEVE IT, CALL AND BE CON-’ VINCED. ISMAKCK HALL, “ No. 461 PEARL STREET, Corner of Chatham, New York. WINES, LIQUORS, LAGER BEER, BILLIARDS and CIGARS. Open Day and Evening. JACOB F. HAAS, Proprietoa VVINES, LIQUORS AND ALES V V OF THE VERY BEST QUALITY, at MA. IN ISO TV(If. al moriil ISTouseb NO. 19 BEEKMAN STREET, Agent for McEwen’s Finnan Hadoies. [ No. 123 ROOSEVELT Street, also No. 173 BROADWAY, and N©. 2 COURTLANDT Street, N. Y., I5OOJ? and ©HIOJE MAKER* HAND-SEWED CALF GAITERS MADE ON THE PREM- ISES FOR $4 OU SpectaclesT-bbaziliak pebbles and Double Vision Glasses, in gold, silver, and other frames. Also, the celebrated Eye Preservers, so highly appreciated at the Eye Hospital aud the Eye Infirmary, I being superior to any other article, giving ease and vigor to the weak, aud preserving the perfect sight for many years. Professor FRANKS, Oculist and Optician, Lec turer on the Human Eye and Optics, accurately and sci entifically adjusts these far-famed spectacles to defective visions at his office, No. 319 Grand street, near Allen. ’ mHE SCIENCE OF LIFE; 11 Or, SELF-PRESERVATION. ■ Two hundredth edition, re vised and enlarged, jurt pub lished. It is a standard medical work, the best in the English language, written by a physician of great experi ence, to whom was awarded a gold and jeweled medal by i the National Medical Association. It contains beautiful and very expensive steel plate engravings, and more than fifty valuable prescriptions for all forms of prevailing dis eases, the result of many years of extensive and success ful practice. 3UO pages, bound in French cloth; price only sl, sent by mail The London Lancet says: "No person should be without this valuable book. The author is a I noble benefactor.” Anillustrated sample sent to all on receipt of six cents tor postage. Address i • Dr. W. H. PARKER, No. 4 Bullfinch street, Boston. The author may be consulted on all diseases requiring skill and experience. ,' XTERVOUS EXHAUSTION.—A Medical X M essay comprising a series of lectures delivered at Kahn’s Museum of Anatomy, New York, on the cause and cure of premature decline, showing indisputably how lost health may be regained, affording a clear synopsis of ths impediments to marriage and the treatment of nervous I and physical debility, being the result of 20 years’ experi ence. Price 25 cents. Address the author, Dr. L. J. KAHN, office aud residence, No. 51 East Tenth streets New York. gb ,*»' ogb a Week to Agents. $lO Outfit free 4 4 p. o. VICKERY. Augusta, Maine ASTROLOGIST. — MME. MORROW. Seventh Daughter, tells your thoughts on entering her room. No. 179 Orchard street, between Houston and Stanton streets. Fee, 50 cents. Gentlemen not admitted. Madame rene, clairvoyant, TELLS FORTUNES at No. 360 West Twenty-fifth. I street, near Eighth avenue. Room 20. FEE, 25 CENTS TMTAD. WAGNER, FORMERLY OF NO. Ly i. 99 Orchard street, now at No. 83 Delancey over butcher shop. Trustworthy Clairvoyant. ~A TTENTION, PAfIENTS!—No. 34 Bond jnk_ st Consult Dr. PROTIN, from Paris. Fee, $L All dfceases, recent or old, speedily and radically cured witbr »ut mercury. 30 years’ experience. Open till BP. M. ‘ TIO' THE AI'FLICTED.—IMMEDIATE JL Successful Treatment, from whatever cause, is as sured at the office of Dr. A. M. MAURICEAU, office oveih tlnrty years, No. 129 Liberty street. Advice free. DR. AND MRS. BOTT, No. 106 EAST FIFTEENTH STBEET. Comifitatlon free. I TART" GRINDLE TREATS ALL FE- H / male Complaints, whatever the cause, with un paralleled success. TWENTY-FIVE YEARS’ PRACTICE. Residence and Office, No. 142 Weak Forty-eighth street,. ? between Sixth and Seventh,avenuea. ffrr wtaoeacsHanrogKs TJKTZKcrYWJ Mccasa “ jbi: - ~~ ; “THE HAWK-EYE, d BURLINGTON, IOWA e A Metropolitan J-Page Daily. ; HAWK-EYE PUBLISHING co., publishers. r t - * (From September Number of itvweWs Centennial Neiospa- ' per ErJiibiV/fn.) 1 Thisbrlkht Western paper, under the management a irJvoußgclner, Mr. Fraud llu-.tou, hardly yet thirty years, n has within two years of bla propnetorshi p. earned " a nMtona Reputation lor its lerio and vigorous handlins nve topics, and tor its sparkling and original humor i. 7s imoted and circulated irom ocean to ocean, from. - Maine co Texas and the mountains, oeing universally ao. W U.mwledtred one of the best of its class. 'The 1-1 awk-Ey, to i occupies toe ground door reet) and five doorsl (SOxSO re..t > undoubtedly one of tuo finest newspaper oulldings ci in ithe West On the great transcontinenta Hine, well « known aa the “Burlington Route,” in the very center of ¥ ; the richest portion ot tae country, in & town of 30,(W pe®. 7 So, way should it not grow and prosper .The first papei * Fn iowa to require and use ror its circulation a double-cyb I maer press, it leads in all things and follows in nothing. uoDubUcan and Radical in politics, it fearlessly and i a do» nendently eritises Republicans as it sees their enora. * ® ' P While its daily has a circulation unequaled by any other " i daiiv inTterritory at least 350 miles in diameter, it also has a large and growing weekly circulation, ivTito immediate locality, and a very warm and admiring —-• mmnnffineitvand country round. Beside a regular city ■ mS P mmlclrcuiJ“h ot“,sbJ eoplM daily, it has a motro- oy news-dealers and train-dealers, pohtan Circmatio . oy ‘ ttßquentt y 1,550 copies pet day. that within 10) miles east and 150 mile, De 1 rBiS-HnSon they sell more Hawk-Eybs than any w .k ßt . J«ent Shlcaeo papers, and ten to twenty times as . ® the CJJof P all other" lowa papers. Jealous o! itssnprem mauy.¥newspaper, welcome co people ot all parties.for litJrature and wlc,‘and the fullness of its n'? e 2f i Sd market reports, it does not wish co make itself » JEo Circulating adverti wr ;6n co those who choose to PAY it, rates it otters one of the oast mediums in the coun i reaching a large and excellen t portion ot the peo- The local patronage ot Tire Hawk-Eyb is ths bask 4 L. have ever seem and shows the laith ths peoqjsoi cu< ” witBTSSWWIOTUS HA*i-iiX»a*««pJjs,