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VOL. 58. WOODSTOCK, VA., WEDNESDAY,1 JULY, 17 1878. NO. 4 i SHENANDOAH HERALD 18 F?BLISHED WEEKLY BY SHENANDOAH HERALD PUBLISHING CO HT Subscription, Two Dollars per year in a.lv.uice. If u it i . , Ttro Dollars and Fifty Cents will be charged. au aajiiaaiiliiall >nsot a private i charged fer U3 a advr: Job Printing. All kinds ol Job Werk done at the aaoat reaeaetabV srmmm^m .. . i.? ii.i i ? i. .m Profttsi ? (Janh. \ i.. WYNKOOP, .1 t t <> i; y /?: r at i a n\ Office on MDin Streot Opposite thj Cou:. WOOIOTOCK, V V. Will practice in the tw Special ;itt.-iiti ?talma and ell legal business entrust* Sept. 5th?tf. \\ m. ut is Mi. Jacsaos on Thar - ttnrday, befo? lo i nd T ,? - uieiith, at Dr. L. II. Jordan' Hoai M. I.. WALTON k WALTON, At ; ; aw WOODSTOCK, VA. ions w aLTOS : Page, Warret an i :: Having quad ,'i'iirt? jf tl.e 1 nited States, in \ ? ?i. i.'. ills*. A LLEN & MAGRUDER, ATTORNEYS AT LAW. WOODS TOC A', SHENANDOAH COUNTY, Y.v i 's. i;. WILLIAMS, WM. i. wir: : YV'Li ? ATTORNEYS AT LAW WOODBTOCK, VA. Prad ? a tu.- e 1 . s. Dl?tl .. C >uit. H. ii. riddleberger, attorney at law. woods: - j WILLIAMS kORAl FIBS INSUI ' ' WOODSTOCK, VA. - ? ? ? usual pr?.. t GEORGER CALVERT, J AT?ORNYAT LAW, New Market, Va i'l' ? I T BORDEN. .1 ? 7 " R V /.').!; Wo - ind Hai give him a call, ? - ub-r T 1) R A- MARTIN. SURGEON jgg-Sf?) ! ' ?;. .. , i ilia; !'. -!. Y ravel, in tt rapt attention Jan 13tb t? J/" ' ? ' ( ' .1 EN s M \N-. VT ?DllIA, VA JAMES OREEN . Aill liud tais au agi t. M. L M. HISEY CABINET MAKI'.,. AN!? W&k Undertaker **--l i L'KNiTi ;;i: ? noN He h - Wcl-Fille<l. ?i.-.'.v as?u. ( 1?NSMITH T M. RIDDL1 i 11A V K - my NEW GUNS ALWAYS <>N tl\ND FOR SALE. Repairing ncatlv and expetl ? Aii ?UQ4? m material furniehed, intinfe, I. .- ? ?yc-isli aod !'r M R1DDI.?BARGER mar. SI, ISTO. _!v ILSON'S HOTEL, wo W F.ii', ';, ??''. , AMPLE ACCOMU Ihh Iucreu*??? UiMiiiiiid?) of l'ulilic PATRONAGB. rai* hotel has been recent]?' Improved by til- rrection of a bl b'.iiUling which will give i , more room, ami afford ample weommodal t the traveiin.2 public. TUE TABLE will be well ?applied at nil times with Is?best th? market : r'?<?? no pains shall be spared to ?Wtisf*y the wants offtueat? in this department. THE BAU will be stocked ?nth the bes' Liquors. A rail supply of v. Rya whisky, (the only ? i Id in tho county,) "an he ton, wishing a pure article for saaehral par Jurors attending eotni will be I le? tkoir fees per diiin, and the,f esrti Uk"n in payment If desired. Chargea Muden? ?"? .\ cull respect folly solicited. B?BLRT Wil.s May 1 t VIT AUNES. A prompt ai..: in all clirouic diseases of the Womb ?ladder si 1>. !>. (All! ? Dec. 2C-Gmo. Art. COTTKTTY D1REC?OKV ... R, L'alvcrt, - - ? ^' - i.V. H. II. G .... Wo ( ! . - - - - . - - - '1 K. ? ? - - - - SU' . . . . - It. M. Lanti, -.1 . . AN. - - - - - - - - - . - - - ? - - - - II - - - .I - ; VA. Mi:-. S. IIoltzmax, L'rop rietros. . - i l U IIOLTZMAX ? 1825. 1878. OLD DRUG STORE, WOODSTOCK VA B. SCHMITT- - - Proprietor. IDE^T-ER, I.W Drugs, Medicines. Glass, PAINTS, OU.S, DYE STUFF, l?EKFl MI?Y. SOAPS, BRI SUES, - Stationery, etc., ('VM)V, NUTS, FllClT&O. . /',(. Reliability i ? Wo ba' A COMMISSION DEPABTMEflT M ANA!.KM! ' A. E PHILLIPS, illy, Apr. 11-lyr. BUtBtJlU? ham; poetic al. ??after." '? Afti r tin- shower, the tranquil fun ; Alter (lie *now, tin- eiu?ruM - v. hi D the day I? dune ; . ? : sky ; ? hi ?nu it ?jii* : go by ; An. i peacefulf the knoll, the wedding t>*lls ; Alter the bud, tin radiant i i farewell?: I ard? D, the blisaful meed ; . th? flighl .the down? in at ; w, tbo waking wed ; Ait? t the ?had ?wj river, i ft SE8T OF TtCEtl. In ili?- v. ni' 18C3 i iras travel in the pr< onbusineca d.with ;i largecottou manufa use iu Mai I was f cotton, to buy up the ould bo found, in order to si the demand in the iailui the American market. Urown, Jones &Co., footed all lud I must say thai I enjoye trip. dit much i hut for the intense heat of the wea This caused mo much distress in -- of the day, and at such tin have been compelled to halt and i'( under the shade of the stately bat Isidetanl My bearers made no objection . n the contrary, joyed them. I was traveling by d india, having rt ry n.y palanquin is OIK ; luxrioua in the world, as is s i i asy an?l g< utle as to lo sleep. All the comforts can need arc carried m the palanq mprovemcat on it thr know of is the Nile-boat, with its li h man's yacht. T? very expensive luxui in as cheap ? lime . and Lin . my employ : .:.ni to think ?d. 1 was stopp '. state of i -,oue of our best customers, a r Lad ?linn . iig, and e men all :'. I should e ? our business \ uld show 111. BO ..a a wi k more uld make .; was ; jptcd bis . pleas.' gam? ; igbbori - j ? uarrc ivood toward- the south, .-'a estate from the patel ? . f.-i- the nexttwo hundred yards, a nj he thi k jungle, t fowls, and va and four-footed gan I lenty, and i ?I magni .l.mind-. with win splendid sport. I was also shown the native Indi: practiced with t known as t where the lead-colored stork,t' cyrut, with his crimson head and DCC was chased down and killed by a Lav . srous peacocks and blacl . and went limitai "pigsticking," as it i in? d hi India. many risky adventures, oui ( which J luckily came scot free, bot . -.: ikes; but the clima of all was one morning, and whlc mc my life. 1 Lad started from the house aboi ? daybreak to reach a cei tain lank about Qve miles off, where ?'?med that game was very plen lank was a regular walenn Mr.-' ? or hunts man, went with me asa guide, ami was warned to keep in the opeo ground and avoid the jungle, as the place wa "tigerish." Y mu: i was, it wa Ihe - of my heart to see i hing I Lad not yet succeed? in doing in the daytime, Thinkinj ;Lai [ should probably meet one cam lag home from his nocturnal stroll If] . I took my ?Henri i to bag ont if 1 01 ; too many grizzliei en the i rairu - lo Le afraid of a sneak [uel will i. to Lave a surf? it oftigers; and ii it Lad not Ik en lor the aid oi my trust] "repeal r," I lieuld dow be telling ne slory. M- liammi ?i. ? ? ,stole softly le in the gray dusk ol the mornmg, bearing Lis Ion?; inatcli lock ?n his shoulder, and as noiseless ai il, with his Lare t'.-et. A tulirm-, or curved sword, M keen as a razor hung and he bore at his a bundle of? what do >ou lli'inkl Why, - "What ?n the world do you want i ?hammed.-" oak? e ! l curiou*ly. "Do roo expect to if the forest out of their i .dl we," replied Ifobaas . quietly. "Sahib tell Mohammed ii'. ol Sahib, this morning. ? v, i v daageroor. figer mochan? grj 11 ?ii-ii'i'bi.il at sleep. Saliib f ? ? a! ' up if no carry rocket !" ".Nonsense, Mohammed," I rej ''What in thunder is the use of I things? They won't kill any one. here's old 'Sweet Sixteen'?worth i than all the bundle." By "Sweet Sixteen" I meant mi teen?ahoaUagHenry rifle, my emu ion in several hunt?. "Sahib shall sec," replied Mel im c!. "Maybe glad to have racket by soon." I ceased to argue with Mohami and wc proceeded in silence along path. The east all aglow with the Vent Mush that heralds the rising the dew was sparkling on every and bush in the jungle, and myriai birds were singing their morning m dies of praise to their Cieator. ?Ve walked briskly along the that wound through the jungle ts lonely tank, and just as we an there, up leaped the the broad red pouring a blaze of gold on the turf* the water. The tank was au itnnieusc artil rest i voir, built ?u times past by s pious prince to preserve tho blessinj abundant water m that dry climate, wc came near it was alive with wa fowls. Ducks and wild geese inn?mera of various bright colors, swam to fro, gabbling loudly. Peacocks screai discordantly from the encircliug jun and monkeys and parrots kept up t harsh chorus. At the further cud of the tank, nc ly a quarter of a mile long, stos base elephant, drinking peacefi while several in ids of deer and ai lope stood near and shared the enj ment. I plainly saw that it was i less to approach by the iront, and th fore, motioning to Mohammed to ful me, I plunged into the jungle, iutc ing to make a circuit and intercept elephant, Bat I hal mlscalnlated the diflie tii - of the path. Ere long I had ] the direction of the tank, hidden from view in the thick jungle, and \ wandering I know not where, amo ei'pses o? low bushes interspersed ? taller trees and little open glades,whi the coarse yellow ?urpul gra s lay un ted all over the granad* .don for tome time, thinking was parallel with the tank, but I coi see no opening anywhere, and at las tinned around to inquire, the way ot'n follower. But Mohammed liad d appi .ni d. Whether be wai my temerity in venturing alone int< tigcr?baunted jungle, or had failed keep up With me on account of ! t load I could uot tell. All knew was that I wa.- alone, and lost the jungle. I began to feel a little UerVOas, 1 1 poo-boohed the thought of daugcr.a would remeiuber the direction to t tank. I thought, aud pushed toward [ tried to calculate the distance oft tun by this time from tho east, a started in the direction 1 thought t tank ought to be. I stole cautious ietly on, not daring te mal much noise on account of the luppat vicinity o:' tiger.-, and began to flatt myselfIsboul reach the tank safe! when l suddenly baited spellbound, Right before me, within ten feet. 1: a huge royal tiger, as largo as an o fast asleep, The old rascal bad been out all nig and was enjoying his morning na] Curli d up like an old tabby cat. He hi not heard my footsteps, and I halted dead sileucc. He lay right in my patl aud I could not pass him withot waking him. I was afraid to lese m direction, for fear I might wandt ad infiniiam in the devious tangle. jungle. Still 1 could not pass on will o.it disturbing the tiger. I would hav tried a bullet, but, from the position i which he lay, I should have probabl mist d his brain or heart. I steppe softly back to retreat, keeping my gaz ixed on the tig-r, when, a? luck woul . my very first ilep brought m on a dry Itisk, which snapped in tw with a loud noise, lu nn instant the tiger awoke. Only partially, however. He wa dazed with the light in his eyes, am danced around with an inquiring stare No time was tobe lost, ? was not twelve feet from the hug brute, and well within nil spring, goat "s-wcet Sixteen" to my shoulder and aimed right between the fierce,grcei eyes, as the tiger half rolled up on hi side with his head raised. As I pullei the trigger, the Hash and smoke oh ?cured everything from my vision for i moment, but I heard no sound ; aud m the smoke cleared away, I boheld th? Striped monarch of the jungle lying deal before me. But I had scarcely time to note this when, horrors on horror?! up startet live tigers within a radius ot twenty si thirty feet, and stood staring at mc with apparent astonishment : The] could not have becu more astODUbet than I was to see them, The striped coat of the tiger, brilhaui a-it appears, is yet so well suited ta the color of the jungle, as tobe well nigh invisible. Hence my ignorance ol the proximity of the beasts. My hair began to rise right up ou my head at the idea of my danser, as ] surveyed these live monitors, a?y sue of them beiBg able to gobble me up at u meal and want mere. Hut I had not fongbt "Old Kphc" among the Hocky Mountains to give up eveu among ?ucli straits. "Sweet Sixteen" had the ?ever revers, d and a new chargo hi tho batral before you could say "Jack Robinson." I took a steady aim at the tiger immediately in front of mc, and bowled him over a? dead a? a door nail. His companions started a? they ?aw him lui, and taking ndsantago of the pause. I dashed fuward over hi? dead body towards the tank. My flight was the signal for pursuit. Scarcely had I cleared the dead tiger, when four simultaneous roars of anger greeted my ears, and I could hear the crash of the fallin?: bodies as all four sprang tor the spot I had just vacated. So eager were they that they fell one against the other. But they were dis appointed in their leaps, and, like all felines, looked ashamed, and hesitated about taking another. I saw that boldness was raj only sal? vation. I was only six feet from the foremost tiger, and pointing my gun at bis broad forehead, I had the satisfac? tion of seeing him bite the dust. What I should have deno with the ether three 1 cannot toll, for they were taken off my hands very unexpectedly. A sud? den and sputtering noise'arosc close by, and a fiery-tailed monster shot through the air into the midst of the three tigers blowing up with a loud report im? mediately between the two rearmost. You ought ta have seen those creat? ures get. The rocket took all the fight out of them in a momeat, scared them almost to death. All three galloped oil', with their tails swelled out to three times their natural size with terror, while I stood laughing unrestrainedly at the ludicrous figure cut by my lately formidable oppouents. Mohammed, the shikkaree. bad pro? ved my salvation. He had been hunting for me when he heard my first shot close by, and hastened to the spot to be of assistance If possible. He had just arrived in the nick of time. His rocket.. proved even more efficacious than my bullets, and I learned a lesson,not le go toe far into the jungle alone again, for fear ? might fall unawares into another nest of tigers. Harries" After tbc Teralft. Iu Antioch on the Contra ('outra shore ot the broad San Joaquin, there has lived for some years past a s<?me I what singular eld man, Geo. Mitchell. I Whiskey was bit besetting sin. On the morning of the 25th of January last old George was misse,1 from his customary lb ' ping place In a room back of Dahn ken's drinking saloon. His ?watchman's lamp was found, with the glass shat? tered, near by. blood spst< and stains were discovered on and about the wharf | and, as pistol shots had been heard in the night, it was strongly suspected that he had been foully dealt with.? Search was made in the mud and shal? low water about the wharf, and tin body of poor old Ueorgc was found?a ghastly bole entirely through his body and clothing made by a pistol ball. Suspicion rested ou one J, F. W. i Hank, who had been abuui neighbor : ing saloons the night before, very drunk ' and Aourishing a pistol, and who In ono i saloon bad said, in a wild, random sort of a way. that he had shot a man who had tried to rob him, and had seen bun fall oil* the wharf, and if anybody was missing, "be had dene it." Hank was Captain of a large three-masted schoon? er, the A. P. Jurdan, that had been lying a week or two in the river, two miles below Antioch, to let the fresh water kill the teredos in her bottom.? He had bren In town several times, but ' was not generally known. II happened : that justas the dead body was fished up. some one discovered that C'apt. Hank had left the wharf m his small boat, and was then sailing away toward his vessel. Constable Pitts immediately chartered at: Italian fishing boat, and, and accompanied by two stout fisher? man, started in pursuit and captured the fugitive. Throughout the trial there sat by the side of the prisoner's lawyer, and much of the time toward the close, by the side of the prisoner himself, h pretty, elegantly dressed, intelligent looking maalei', Mary Angosta Kaymond. It wa- given out and generally iinaier.-toud that she was his fiancee. She seemed devoted to her lover, and exceedingly das| oadcnt.Shc watched him constantly; and paid the closest attention to all the proceedings, anxiously scanning the Lues of the jurors, and only on one or two occasions, when something very di? verting was said, did her ?features light op will? a smile). Wlien the jury ren? dered the verdict of "Not guilty" some of the spectators expected the young lady to manifest lier emotions by some 'marked demonstration, but save the tightening of the arm of (.'apt. Hank and a long drawn breath, there was nothing. Then the lawyers, the clerk,and the Court had whispered conversation: then Hank was sworu by the clerk. He signed his name to something, and then Mr. Mills directed Hank and Miss l?ay moiil to stand up facing the Jii?l^e,with hands joined. The bewildered jurors and other spectators Dow began to uu ?leistaiid the situation, and Judge Dwindle, in his most impressive tones and manner, began to recite the mar? riage service. Said he: "Joachin, do you take this woman to be your law. fully wedded wife?" and Jeacbiu said he did; and the judge said: "Mary, do you take this man to be your lawfally wedded husband f" and Mary said yes and then they were solemnly pro? nounced husband aud wife A well-dressed boy, ten years old, stood on the walk in frout of the City Hall the other day eating an apple. A ragged urchin, having a rag bag OTcr big shoulder, stsed close by and looked as if he would 1,'ive his hat and boots for one bite of the fruit. An attache of the City Hall usted the situation, and Ata? greatly pleases1 to ?eu the lad suddenly hand over the apple to the euvious rag-picker. 'That's a good hoy?that was real charity!' exclaimed the gentleman as he putted the boy on the- head. 'Yes, I felt wrry for him,' replied tin boy?'and I'd got down to a big worm hoi?, too!' A Flying Machine. The first open-air exhibition of a new flying machine, invented by Prof. C. P. Ritchell, was given at Hartford recently and proved a success. The following description of the air ship, and account of the sccoud ascension, we find in the New York Sun: The flying machine is all clumsiness above, all lightness and grace below. The lifting pswerls af? forded by a herizontally-placed cylin? der of "gossamer cloth," fine linen coated with india rubber, twenty-five feet in length and thirteen in diameter, weighing only sixty-six pounds and charged with hydrogen gas, which made by the usual process from iron turnings and sulphuric acid. Broad worsted bauds exteud over that aud dowu to a rod of mandrcl-drawu brass tubing, nickel-plated, one and one-half inches in diameter, and 23 feet long.? Prom that rod the machine is suspended by slender cords. Tnc after portion of the machine is at the base a parallelo? gram of rods two feet wide and five and one-half feet long, from which rise, lengthwise, curved rods eighteen inches high in the center, and drawn uear to? gether at the top. All these rods arc in reality hollow tubes of mandrel drawn brass, light, and very strong. Abare the apex ot this form rises a cog-edged steel wheel, eleven inches in diameter, with double haudles so geared to a four-bladed Ian moving horizontally, directly beneath, that the operator can give the fan 2,000 revo? lutions per minute. The four blades of the fan are of white holly, each having a superficial area of about fifty square inches, and the extreme diameter of this rovolving fan is twenty-four inches.? The blades are set at a slight angle, like those of the screw of a propeller.? Just behind the wheel is a very small seat, upon which the operator perches. His feet rest upon two light treadles above and in front of the lau. From the front of this ferm spring other rods, Carrying at their extremity a vertically working revolving fau, like that beneath the operator's scat, except that it is but twenty-two inches in diameter. It Is so geared to the main or horizostal fan that it may be operated or not at the pleasure of the driver of the machine, and can be made to turn from one side t? ?tin r. so ai to deflect the course of the machine in the air. This fau will make 2,800 evolution? per minute when the other is making 2.000. All its movements arc cttitrollcd by the oper? ator's feet. When he presses the left treadle he throws it mto gear., when he presses with the toe of his right foot it turns to the left, and a light pressure of his heel whirls it ever to the right. He can also reverse the action ot his main um. so that when it whirls eue way he goes down, and when its course is re? versed, he mounts in the air. That this is uot merely a claim, has been clearly demonstrated. Them the weight of the operator and machine, aud the lilting power of the gas cylinder have been to nicely adjusted that they were exactly balanced, six pounds have been added to the weight of the ma? chine aud the working of horizontal fan has caused the apparatus to rise aud con? tinue to ascend as long as the lifting power of the machinery was exerted. The weight, normally of tlic machine, and the rod from which is is suspended, is forty-eight pounds. This,then, gives 11-1 ponds, as the weight of the entire apparatus. The operator, Mark Quin? tan, who went up ou Wednesday and again on yesterday, weighs niaety-six pounds, and to balance him and the dead weight against the lifting power of the gas, he had to carry along with him about Dine pounds of shot and stone-. The second exhibition was given in the afternoon. The weather was far from favorable. The wind came in emite sharp gusts, and there were threat? ening of acomiugstorm. Nevertheless, the ascent was made. Little Quiulan, even ?the does euly weigh niuety-six pounels,has confidence and uerve enough to go up in a gale. Some time was spent m getting the weight and lifting power so neatly ballauccd a? to show that the machine could exert a lifting power of his o\su. When this had been effected to Prof. Ritchel's satisfaction, the ap? paratus rested quietly on the grass, but could be lifted er set back with the light pressure of one linger. Theu word was given to "Go..' Qaialan began turn in? the wheel, the horri/.outal fan re? volved with a noise like a buzz-saw.and the machine darted up almost vertical? ly to a heighth of about two hundred feet. There a stroll.', steady current of wind setting toward the south-west was encountered, and the machine wa? swept away by it, broadside on the spec? tators. Then the operator was seen throwing his Vertical fan into gear, and by its aid the aerial ship turned around, pointing its head in whatevei direction he chose to give it. All this was the work of bat a few seconds. Although (?uinlaii could move the apparatus about, he could not make any headway again-l the strong wind. Reserving the motion of his honzontal fan,he descend? ed apparently about one hundred feet. to get out of the curi'cut, but, finding that impracticable, reaseeuded to a much greater height than he had first reached. Still he was swept oil toward New Haven, and aftera little time went out of sight. He had vanished behind m distant hill, and for a while it wa? sup? posed he had alighted. Then ho was again ?.ightcd, hi away and not less thi n one thousand feet above the earth. The cylinder of the machine looked no lar? ger than an orange, At length he dis, appeared altogether. At Gj o'clock,having been up battling with the wind very nearly an hour, he descended safely at NVwington, and a* ten o'clock wn? back in Hartford. He ?aid that at one time he was eight er ten miles awny from his starting-point, but by tacking and working between the ?usts of wind, won his way back H far as Newington, only five miles from Hartford. He says that the working of the machine is so easy that he could continue It for four cons?cutive hours, without fatigue, in a quiet atmos? phere. iDilroelleni te s Jury. Speaking of courts, reminds us of a funny instruction said to have been given by a judge to a jury in?well, we won't say in what State. It runs in tbis way: 'If this jury believe, from the evi deuce, that the plaintiff and the de? fendant were a partner in the grocery, and that the plaintiff bought out the defeudant and gave his note for the interest, and the defendant paid for the note by delivering to the plaiutitf a cow which he waraanted 'notbreachy,' and the warranty was broken by reason of the breachiuess of the cow, and the plaintiff drove the cew back aud ten? dered her to tke d?tendant, but the de? fendant refused to receive her, and the plaintifl* took her home again, and put a heavy yoke or poke upon her to pre? vent her from jumping the fence, aud the cow In attempting to jump the fence, by reason ?f the aforesaid poke or yoke, brske her neck aud died, and if the jury further believe that the defen? dant's interest in the grocery aforesaid was not worth anything, the plaintifl's note was worthless, and the said cow good for nothing, either lor milk or beef, or for 'green hide,' then the jury must find out for themselves how they will decide the case for the court, if she understands herself, and she thinks sin do, don't know how such a ittSSed i ue should be decided.' Hard work and judicious economy ol strength, time, aud money, are the secrets of success in life. ?Lock does not count for so much as many people suppose. Accidental circumstaii? regards time and place, of course, con? tribute much to success in life; ?but it may be laid down as a general rule, that men who seem to be successful have net attained the eminence without intense aud continued thought and pcrsevereuce. A ?tickling about Lours of work, professedly for the soke ot recreation. Is obstructive to all M beyond a mediocrity, Never was there a truer word uttered than that 'the hand of the ?diligent maketh rich.' In no de? partment of life do men rise to eminence who have not undergone a long aud dil gent preparation ; for whatever be the difference in the mental powers of the individual-;, it is the cultivation ef the mind alone leads to distinction. If we look around and contemplate the history of those men who we esteem,we find that this suptrion-y of knowledge has been the result of great labor and diligence. It is an iil-fouuded notion to say that merit in the long run is neglected. It is sometimes joined to circumstances that may have a little in? fluence in counteracting it. as an un? fortunate manner and temper, but it generally meets with its due reward. Among the civil engineers employed at the time the Union Pacific railroad was .beiug surveyed was one by the name of Black, a gruk1, sharp-spoken man, who was easily irritated. Une ?lav.jas an old colored man was watch? ing the proceedings with apparently in? tense interest, he unintentionally stepped iu front ot the instrument through which Black was looking. Black yelled to him, with an ?ath, to get out of the way. a movement which he immediately executed. Turning to one of the wen. he asked: ?Boss, who be that old soaker ?' Upon his replying, 'That's Black, the civil engineer,' lie ejaculated: 'Cibil! cibil engineer! Boss, I gota old pig down homo, and if he wasn't more cibil thau dat feller, I'd go home and cut his throat. It is said the Stewart estate is worth about seven millions less now than when Mr. Stewart died, the loss being the depreeiaciation iu the value of real estate. Tive millions of this loss is on the portion of the property given into the control of Judge Hilton, which com? prised the busiucss and the real estate with it, aud was estimated to be worth thirty millions at Stewart's death. Shrewd busiucss men predict that five years will bring bankruptcy to this por? tion of the vast estate. 'No. I?can't pay you!' exclaimed be; ?sore's I staud here, I haven't got a cent of money to my name.' And bringing down his hand on the side of his leg byway of emphasis, he all un? intentionally awoke to the echo the slumbering dimes, quarters an?! half dollars in his ?r?teten pocket. Then as his creditor gazed into his eye. he wildly fled, while he gasped. 'Silver will be the ruin of this country yet.' - ? .*>? ? Pious old Boston gentleman ob -11 m s boys playing marbles on the Common one Sunday. 'Boys,' he says sternly, 'boys, do yon know what day this is?' One of the boys yells out, 'Here, Bill, can you toll this mar? what day it is ? ho don't know !' laid of the missionory enterprise. The last idiotic performance by way of exhibiting human enduranoo is that of Mrs. Maud Giles, a choir singer in New York. She sings uninterrup? tedly for three hours iu tiro lauguages without showing signs of fatigue. In view oi the fact that very many women hare heeu known to talk for twelve hours in the key of Q, this performance doesn't seem so very remarkable. 'I mean business,' said a burglar who entered Mr. Patterson's heu*?, in j Sterling, 111. 'So do I,' said Mr. Pai I terson, aud ?hot him through the head. SE?iYANDOAH HERALD Advertising Bate?? AdverUienienta will be inserted at Oae Dollar per square of ten line?, or lees, for the first ieser tion, and SO cents for each subsequent lnaarMoa. Uuleaa the number of insertions be marked apon the manuscript, it wlU be published until forbid and charged accordingly. Notn-es iu the local column will be Inserted l ten cent? pe; iu, , each InaerUon. Advertisement? for three monjas or longer wlU I be inserted at lower'ratea The Troubles er a Peet. While Colonel Bangs, editor of the 'Argus,' was sittiug iu his office one day, a man whose brow was clothed in thunder, entered. Piercely seizing a chair, he slammed his hat en the table, hurled his umbrella on the floor, and ?asi down. 'Arc you the editor?' he asked. Tea.' 'Can you read writing ?' 'Of course.' ?Read that, then,' he said, thrusting at the Colonel en envelope with an in? scription on it. 'B?' said the Colonel, trying to spell it. 'That's not ? B. It's au S,' said the man. 'S; oh, yes; I bob ! Well, the woids look a little like 'Salt for Dinner,' or '.Souls of Sinners,'said the Colonel. ?No, sir,' replied the man, nothing of the kind ! That's my name, Samuel II. Bruuuer. I kuew you couldu't read. I called to see you about that poem of mine you printed the other day, on the 'Surcease of Sorrow.' 'i don't remember it.' said the Colonel. 'Of course you don't, because it went into the paper under the title of'Smear case To-morrow.' ?A stupid blander of the com? positor's, I suppose.' "Yes, sir ; and that's what I want to sec you about. The way in which that poem was mutilated was simply scanda? lous. I haven't slept anight since. It exposed me to derision. People think I am an Ml, Let me show you.' ?(?o ahead,' said the Colonel. ?The first Hue, when I wrote it, read in tiiis way: Lying by a weepin? willow, andeiueath a gent!? ?lope. 'That is beautiful, poetic, affecting.-? Now, how did your vile sheet present it to the public? There it is. Look at that ! Made it read this way: Lying to a?vteerlcg ?idow, to Indue? h?r'o eloie, ?Weeping widow, mind you! A widow! 0 thunder and lightning! This is too much! it's enough to drive a man crazy ! ' 'I'm sorry,' said the Colonel; "but?' 'But look a-h?rc at the fourth verso,' said the poet. That's worse yet? What I said was: Cast thy pearls befare the swine, aud ?an tea? 10 the dirt. T wrote that out clearly and distinct? ly, in a plain, round hand. Now what docs your compositor do? Does he catch the sense of that beautiful senti? ment? Docs it sink into his soul? No, sir?le sets it up in this fashion. Listen: Cart my pills before sunrise and love them if th*y hurt. ?Now, isn't that a cold-blooded out? rage on a man's feelings? I'll leave it to you.if it isn't hard ?' 'It's hard, that's a fact.' said U.e Colouel. 'And then take the fifth verse. Iu the original manuscript.it said,plain as day? light : lake away the Jingling money, it i? only guttering dross. ?A man with only one eye, and a cataract over that, could have read the words correctly. Rut your pirate, up? stares there?do you kuow what he did? He made it read Take away th? jeering monkey? on a sorsly dared boss. 'By George, I felt like braiuing bin with a tire-shovel ! I was Derer ^o cut up in my life.' 'It was natural, too,' said the Colonel. 'There, for instance, was the sixth verse, 1 wrote. I am veary of the u.*siBg sf ttM MSM as it he?\?s. 'It's a lovely line too ; but imagine my horrer.and the anguish of my family when I opened your paper and saw the Une transformed into. I am wearing ont my trouer* t.'l they're opeo, it the kaees. ?That's a little too much! That seem? to mc like carrying the thiuj an inch or two loo far. I think I have a constitu? tional right to murder thai compositor; don't you;' 'I think you have.' ?Let me read you oae more verse. I Wrote? I swell the rlvinc c. hots a? they ream among th? biua, Aud I feel my wiul awaken lin the ec ttacy that thrill?. 'Now, what do you s'posc your miser? able outcast turned that into? Why, iu to this? I saiell th-frMng shot-.- as tl.ey cast along the balls, 1 my seul mistaken te the accuracy that W hul?. 'Gibberish, sir ! Awful gibberish ! 1 must slay that man ! Where is he?' ?lie is eut. just now.' said the Colonel. 'Come in to-merrew.' ?1 will.' said the poet, 'and I will come armed.' Then lie put on his hat. shouldered his umbrella, and drifted oil down stairs.?May Aider. Kansas farmers estimate corn at 11 coats a besibe?, at which price it - i cheaper fuel than coal or wood. We labor under the impressiou that Mr*. .Unk* ?s a bigger man than ol Butler. There are too many men with more ambiliea than brains in this country fer the country's good. The Texas wool clip this season is estimated at 3,000,000 pounds. .-?m? ?*y-m? Wc saw a young mau with two heads on his shoulders, the other day, but didn't consider it much of a curiosity.? One belonged to his girl. A young lady being asked by a rich bacheler, 'if not yourself, who would you rather be?' replied sweetly and modestly, 'Yours truly.* 'Heroine' is perhaps as peculiar a word as any in our language. The first two letters of ?tire male, the three first female, the lour first a brave man, and the whole word a brave woman, A correspondent write? to ask what is proper to wear at picnics. We should ?ay Vlothei.'