Meade County news. [volume], October 24, 1912, Image 3

About Meade County news. [volume] (Meade, Kan.) 1900-1918

Image provided by: Kansas State Historical Society; Topeka, KS

                
SPARKS FAMILY HAPPENINGS
THE KID EATS
BY EDWARD
BS. SPARKS eat in the
window of tne muo
flat, darning. Tommy
Sparks, aged tour, had
been allowed to go
alone to play in the
great yard that lies
between the apart
ment building and the
swell private resi
dence which faceB the
drive. Mr. Sparks was
, at his office, and an
the young SparKses,
barring Tommy, were at school. From
Mrs. Sparks' vantage point In the lit
tle bay window she could catch occa
sional glimpses ol a painter in the big
yard next door, who was moving
along slowly from stone to stone
painting the foundation of the house
of their rich neighbor a subdued sort
of red color.
Mrs. Sparks was dreamily wonder
ing why thtf foundation which had
been pretty in its natural hue, need
ed painting at all, when Tommy
Sparks toddled In through the door
way leading from the kitchen. Tommy
had come up from the yard the back
way. Tommy had some streaks of
red running diagonally down from
each corner of his mouth, and his
linen dress was spotted in places with
the same color.
"Tommy Sparks," demanded his
mother, "what on earth have you been
eating?"
Tommy climbed into a chair, swung
his legs in his Infantile way and said:
"Mamma, painter's pie's good."
Mrs. Sparks gave one hurried, hor
rified glance through the window at
the red paint which was being aauDea
on the neighbor's house, and then
turned her anguished countenance
toward Tommy.
"Tommy," her voice was a pleading
wall, "did you eat the painter's stuff
out of the pall?
"Yes, out of the pail; painters pies
good," answered Tommy.
Mrs Sparks shrieked. The maid
rushed in from the kitchen. "Get the
doctor, the druggist and Mr. Sparks,"
Bcreamed Mrs. Sparks. "Tommy's eat
en paint and sugar of lead and every
thing. Go, girl, go." Susan rusneo
through the door, sent the corner
druggist flying up to the housfe, or
dered the clerk to telephone Mr.
Sparks and then sat out on a chase for
the doctor.
In the meantime Mrs. Sparks was
moaning over Tommy, who was tak
ing the unusual commotion which he
had created as blandly as would most
four-year-olders. He Insisted on occa
sionally reiterating that "painter's pie
was good," and at each reiteration the
'mother's heart sank.
.The druggist rushed in. "Tommy
has eaten paint. Heaven alone knows
how much. It must have had sugar
of lead In it, and that's sweet and
that's why he ate it."
The druggist grabbed up Tommy,
half threw him onto a lounge, and
then turned to the mother. "Control
yourself, Mrs. Sparks; life depends on
Instant action. Get me salt, potash
and softsoap." Luckily Mrs. Sparks
bad all three articles in the house,
end she rushed off to .the kitchen and
brought them back. Tommy as yet
showed no sign of collapse. The drug
gist put two tablespoonfuls of salt In
half a glass of lukewarm water and
forced Tommy to swallow it sputter
ing. This dose was followed up with
a heroic one of potash, and then
Tommy was made to swallow a large
coffee cupful of softsoap. With the
soap down and Tommy's eyes hang
ing out of his head and well down
over his cheek bones, the druggist
turned the youngster over on his
- ctomach on the couch and shook him.
The only thing about Tommy that
didn't rebel at this treatment was his
stomach. That held onto its unaccus
tomed load with a pertinacity worthy
of something better. At this Juncture
the painter appeared on the scene. He
admitted to the tearful Mrs. Sparks
that he had left his paint pot on the
ground where Tommy could have
found It for about five minutes while
he went round the- corner to get a
glass of beer.
At, this Instant the doctor fell in
at the door on the heels of the maid
He approved the druggist's treatment
and added to It a large dose of ipecac.
Under this last added horror Tommy's
stomach and spirit both gave way.
Like the younger hopeful in Helen's
Babies, he played whale, and while he
didn't cast up Jonah he cast up pretty
near everything else.
While Tommy was In the throes Mr.
Sparks arrived, ashy-lipped and shak
en. The doctor turned to him. "I
trust, Mr. Sparks, that if we can keep
him at it for ten minutes more we
njay save Iris life." Tommy kept at it.
The painter, who had retreated be
fore the stricken countenance of Mrs.
Sparks, now reappeared. He was car
rying in one hand a dinner pail, which
lie held upside down to show those
assembled that It was absolutely
empty.
"When I came to work this morn
ing," the painter said, "I had three
in't got any now, a fact I Just dis
covered. I guess maybe the young
ster knows where it went"
PAINTER'S P.E.
B. CLARK
tommy, just out of a paroxysm,
turned his head and caught sight of
the empty dinner pail. "Painter's pie's
good," he murmured.
Mrs. Sparks sank into a chair laugh
ing and crying hysterically. A grin
appeared on Mr. Spark's face. The
doctor and the druggist looked dis
gusted. Mr. Sparks gave the painter
a dollar. "Go to a restaurant and get
a square meal," be said.
"Henry," said Mrs. Sparks, still in
a struggle between two emotions,
"what shall we do with that boy?"
"Well," answered Henry as he sur
veyed Tommy and his surroundings,
"I think from the cleaning these two
professional gentlemen have Just giv
en him, that if we could turn him in
side out he'd make a good advertise
ment for some brand of soap."
The Sparks' Old Soldier Janitor.
"Eliza," said Mr.. Sparks on the
night of the day that they moved into
their new flat, "this apartment life is
worse than one of Dante's circles. I'll
make Just one more move before
I die, and that will be into a house
in a suburb. Here we are just moved,
everything topsy-turvy and no girl. Of
course, the latest .acquisition from the
employment bureau had to leave us
just to throw all the burden of the
packing up and the unpacking on us.
Then again the janitors of all flats are
devils. I'll bet the one in this build
ing will prove to be worse, than any
of the others, and even a "man accus
tomed to using strong language can't
say anything stronger than that. Just
look at this muss, will you, and no
one to help us, fix up."
Just then the front doorbell rang.
"WHAT ON EARTH HAVE YOU BEEN EATING?"
Henry Sparks stumbled over two
trunks, his daughter's bicycle, barked
his shin, bruised his toes and finally
reached the door. There in the hall
stood a young woman, comely ai'd
strong looking. "Is this the place you
want a girl?" she asked.
A sudden joy leaped Into Henry
Sparks' heart. "Yes," he said. "Come
in. We have just moved; we're all up
side, down here. Look out for the
boxes!"
Then Mr. Sparks led the way into
the dining-room and, turned the caller
over to his wife. "Yes, we want a
girl," said Mrs. Sparks; "we've Just
moved in, and It may be you won't
want to stay now; you see how things
are and what cleaning Is to be done."
girl.
"I'm not afraid to work," said the
girl.
At this answer, Henry Sparks, who
stood In a corner, almost fainted. The
girl produced a letter from a Luther
an clergyman in a little country, vil
lage.. It happened that Henry Sparks
knew the man. The girl was taken on
the spot, as she declared she was
ready 'to go to work then and there
and would have her things sent right
over from her cousin's.
During the whole conversation Mrs
Sparks' face had worn -rather a puz
zled expression. When the girl had
volunteered to stay Mrs. Sparks said:
"How did you happen to know we
wanted a girl?"
"I saw your advertisement," was
the answer. ' "Here It is," and the girl
pulled out a copy of the morning pa
per. Mrs. Sparks took it "Mercy,"
she exclaimed, "that's the advertise
ment of Mrs. Smlthkins, who lives in
the flat underneath this. You came to
the wrong apartment'
"Well, I like the looks of this place
anyway, and I'll stay."
"Henry,"8 said Mrs. Sparks, "won't
It be a case of fatae pretense if we
keep her?" ,
"Not by a Jugful. I'll send Mrs.
Smlthkins the price of her advertise
ment in an anonymous letter. 'To
have and to hold' is a good motto in
a case like this."
That girl Rose, who stumbled into
the Sparks' flat that moving day night,
was a dream. She cooked things to
a turn; she was willing; she didnTJ
have a cross word In her vocabulary;
she didn't care to go to balls on Sat-
I urday night, and she was plump and
good-looking. The Sparks' family life
was ideal.
One morning as Mr. Sparks was
leaving the building to go to the office
he met the Janitor, who was coming
up from the basement leading a child
with each hand. Mr. Sparks had bare
ly noticed the janitor before. This
morning something in the man's bear
ing struck him and turning, he said:
"William, you've been in the service."
"Yes, sir," said William, "I put lh
five years in the Fourth cavalry."
"I can tell a regular the minute I
clap eyes on him," said Mr. Sparks.
"I put In a good many years myself.
You have. two fine children here, Will
iam." "Yes," said William assentingly, and
then Mr. Sparks said "Good-bye."
That night when Mr. Sparks reach
ed home his wife said: "The Janitor
came up today and washed the win
dows. I didn't think it was a part of
his work, but he said it was all right
and insisted. He' told me that he usnd
to be in the regular army and that he
knew you had been in the service,
too."
"That's it, Eliza," said Henry, "an
old soldier likes to do things for an
other old soldier. He washed our win
dows because we had both done hard
duty on the plains. He muBt be a
good, steady fellow, for he has a wife
.and two children. tThey have a flat in
the basement."
Mr. Sparks met William quite fre
quently after this. William always
saluted. If he happened to be stnnd
iug still as Mr. Sparks passed he
would come to "attention," clicking
his heels together the while and salut
ing like the old campaigner he was.
Almost every night when he reached
home Mrs. Sparks would tell Henry of
some new act of attention on the pari
of the Janitor. "He came up and
went all over the plumbing today,"
she said one night. "He said he
wanted to make sure that there
wasn't any sewer gas In the place."
"There, it is JUBt as I told you,
Eliza," said Mr. Sparks; "this Janitor
doesn't want to see the family of an
old soldier suffer. I'll give him a box
of cigars tonight Eliza, this Is the
finest kind of life. Never talk to me
again about taking a suburban house.
H Nuisance at the Table
Sto-y of the Man Who Always Tried
to Be Funny, Especially Be
fore Guests.
In a story by 'Mary Stewart Cut
ting in the Woman's Home Compan
ion appears the following characteriz
ation of a man who made himself a
nuisance by always trying to be
funny:
"Mr. Brentwood was well born, well
educated and successful in affairs. He
had, In the eyes of his family, one
fault he had a masculine sense of
humor of a homely, almost rural type,
at which his family winced uncon
trollably. Mrs. Brentwood, even from
the earliest days of their marriage,
had been wont to implore her Theo
dore when they were expecting com
pany, not to be funny."
"Certain jokes or mannerisms of
his at the table were of daily occur
rence. Hardly noticed any more when
they were alone, they sprang into
startling prominence when there were
guests. He always said, 'People come
from miles around to hear us drink
soup.' He Jovially inquired if he might
'borrow the butter,' or if Ellen, the
waitress, could 'spare him another
Here tbs best girl tKM efwr worked
out stumbles In on us by accident,
and we get a janitor who serves us as
though we were moguls."
Things went on this . way tor
months. Henry Sparks told five real
estate agents to quit looking up a
country home for hiin. "You can't beat
the combination I've got right here In
the heart of Chicago," he said.
A box of cigars. went a long way
with the janitor. He Insisted on
beating the Sparks rugs, he glided the
radiators, he fixed the door knobs, and
toward the end of the second month
he was washing the windows every
other day. The windows of the other
flats were dingy and finger-marked.
Rosa was a pearl of great price. She
anticipated every wish of every mem
ber of the family. There was little
left for Mrs. Sparks to do. but to em
broider and to mend Frances' stock
ings. For some reason or other,
Henry SparkB, though he had always
prided himself on his perspicacity,
never noticed that whenever William
found that something In the kitchen
needed fixing the job was always one
that required three or four days' time.
One night Mr. Sparks went down
town to do some work. He didn't get
back till one o'clock. He slipped oft
his shoes at the door so as not to
awaken his wife. He passed through
the hall, and feeling hungry he went
back through the dining room with a
mind and appetite bent on exploring
the kitchen pantry. The ddor leading
Into the kitchen was shut.' In his
stocking feet Mr. Sparks made no
noise. He, opened the door quickly.
The kitchen gas was burning. From
the far end of the room came a click
ing noise. William the Janitor was
standing at attention with his hnels
brought sharply together. As the man
jumped to the position of a soldier
Mr. Sparks saw that one of his arms
had just dropped from Its position Of
embrace about the waist of Rosa, ibe
maid.
Mr. Sparks was horrified. Ho Wont
back to days when as a "non-com" he
had verbally lashed some bluecoat
duty derelict.
'William," he said In a voice of
thunder, "how dare you! You're a
scoundrel, sir!"
"William's hand went to his fore
head In a salute. "Rosa and I are to
be married next week, Mr. Sparks,"
he said. '
Married! was the gasping re
sponse. "How about your wife and
two children down stairs?"
"That's my widowed sister and her
two little ones. She's been keeping
house for me," said William.
Mr. Sparks groaned and went limply
back Into the front room. He waked
his wife. "Eliza," he said, "our dream
Is over. Rosa is going to marry the
Janitor. It wasn't any old soldier
sentiment at all that made him wash
windows. I'll tell Hunt In the morn
ing to look for a home for us in the
country," and, sighing, Mr. Sparks
wont to bed. .
At the breakfast table next morning
William and Rosa came In band In
hand. "We're going to be married
next week, .Mrs. Sparks,," said Rosa,
"but my slBter wants a place and I'll
send her here. She's a better cook
than I am."
At this bit of Information Mr.
Sparks' face cleared visibly. "You
both have my blessing," he said;
"send in your sister Rosa, and If Will
lam leaves here I'll got old Hlghrates
the landlord, to send a good Janitor In
his place, but I'll take good care that
he Is not an old soldier." And then,
forgetful of everything else, Mr,
Sparks turned to his wife and said:
"They can't resist an old soldier, can
they, my dear?"
Danger In "Shuttle Kissing."
"Shuttle kissing," as a vehicle for
the transmission of diseases from one
person to another employed In Eng
lish weaving sheds, Is the subject of
a recent report which has been Issued
as a parliamentary paper. The "kiss
ing" referred to takes place when the
operator puts the thread through an
eye In the shuttle. This is done by
placing the shuttle In the mouth and
sucking the thread through the little
opening. The report says that while
the Investigation has shown the pres
ent method to be uncleanly "and may
even be a possible means of spreading
infection," the committee does . not
think the time is yet ripe for insisting
either by act of parliament or by reg
ulations on the abolition of the exist
ing form of shuttle.
slice of bread.' He made puns on the
vegetables and he had a habit of look
ing with sudden suspicion at any dish
handed to him, no matter how famil
iar, and asking disgustedly, 'What Is
this, anyway?' Strangers always In
spired him particularly to their enter
tainment Certain ancient, inherited
anecdotes could be endured by his
wife and children, even If. with ach
ing strain, but there was a' bathtub
story (Mr. Brentwood had in his early
boyhood migrated with his parents to
what was then the edge of the prai
ries) beginning mendaciously, 'You
know, we never took baths when I
was a boy,' that, though it was amus
ing, nearly went beyond the pale of
refinement, and an awful toothbrush
story which positively did. If people
laughed at his stories, Mr. Brent
wood became practically untrara
meled. "Another common table remark by
Mr. Brentwood was that he never
bad any use for potato salad, because
cold potatoes always reminded him
of cold feet It was also his habit to
admonish people to 'eat 'slowly and
distinctly.' He got this from the old
saying, 'Read slowly and dlstincUjr.'
NEWEST IDEA
ii"1 '
Copyright, 1912, by Underwood & Underwood, N. Y.
Finding the small mirror in the vanity case inadequate, a new opera bag
has been made, the top fitted with a bevelled mirror of fair size, showing
a good deal of the features. The mirror part is folded inside the bag,
giving it a flat effect
WHEN BUYING WRITING PAPER
Certain Times of the Year" When
Suitable Colors and Tones May Be
Acquired In Quantities.
The woman who would get the most
for her money buys her writing paper
in quantity at an annual sale.
The reason for these sales is that
the manfacturers accumulate small
lots of discontinued papers. They are
not cheap qualities or seconds, merely
styles that are not novel.
It is possible to get four quires of
paper apd 100 envelopes for a dollar,
and there is a choice of different
weight, texture and color of the paper,
various shades of blue, gray, lavender,
cream and white, also stripes and bars
In self tones. TheBO come in two
sizes, usually letter and note.
Marking varies according to color.
Two-colored letters are most expen
lve; plain gold, silver or a single
notalllc color coBts about 25 cents a
quire; a single plain color, gray, blue,
violet or brown, ten cents a quire,
and embossing in relief without color,
about five cents a quire. These are
landard prices almost everywhere
he year round, the reduction being
I on the price of paper.;
In buying paper by the quantity it
is not wise to choose novelties. An
inconspicuous color and good quality
is always good. Many women adopt
a certain tone and kind of paper and
nake It individual. Thus, the girl who
loves violet will have pale violet paper
with a deeper tone or sliver ror tne
stamping, while the transparent en
velopes are lined with violet tissue
paper of a deeper shade than the en
velope. .Gray paper or very pale blue is also
permissible, but it is bad form to use
garish stationery.
STYLISH FROCK.
Brown voile over blue silk was the
material used for the dress shown in
the sketch. vThls stylish but easily
made frock has a plain blouse, sleeves
and bodice in one and high waist line
with short gathered peplum. The
sole trimming of the bodice is finely
plaited frills of cream shadow lace
which turn back from elbows and
neck. The sketch above shows a sim
ple arrangement of a pannier, which
s of the voile draped over the voile'
covered underskirt. Three wide ruf
fles of the voile finishing the skirt add
another tench of qualntness to this
pretty frock.
IN OPERA BAGS
GIVE TOUCH OF SMARTNESS
Artificial Rose or Orchid, Easily
Made, Adds Much to Appearance
of an Evening Gown.
Moke a hues rose of black velvet if
you need a little extra touch of smart
ness for your evening or tea gown.
The rose is formed of a dozen or
eighteen petals, cut in the graduated
sizes pertaining to tne natural nower.
eighteen petals, cut in the graduated
foudatlon easily made of firmly
twisted chentle. To make the petals
appear crisp, the velvet Instead of
being doubled, as is done in making
exotics of thin material, is smoothly
pasted on one side of a piece of coarse
black net. The necessary quantity of
mucilage used will stiffen the joined
mntprldls to the desired firmness and
yet they will be sufficiently flexible to
be easily pressed into proper shape
wnenever aisarrangeu.
Easier to shape than the rose Is the
orchid. This, also made of velvet and
coarse net, has six long and slender
netals with pointed ends tied at their
tips with slender golden threads. An
olive, such as la employed in connec
tion with military' loops, is the best
foundation for a velvet orchid, and to
one end of it the wider ends of the
petals may be securely fastened.
This will leave a point protruding
from the heart of the exotic, but one
which may be beautiful concealed un
der a catllx group of seven yellow
silk French knots. The other , nair.
of the olive will be needed as the base
through which to thrust the safety
pins that fasten the flower at the
breast or wherever the corsage boti
quet is worn.
Bridge Maxims.
A good partner is rather to be chos.
en than great hands.
Jack of all suits Is master of none.
A fool and his aces are soon parted.
It's a long suit that has no return
ing. Take care 'of the trumps and the
tricks will take care of themselves.
A little 10-ace is a dangerous thing.
Bridge table conversations corrupt
good manners.
A woman is known by th6 trumps
she keeps. (
The wages of bridge, is debt.
The proof of the bidding Is la the
beating.
All honor is not without profit, save
in the dummy.
Coiffure Modes.
Fringes both straight and curled
still persist, but only a few strands
of hair are cut upon the forehead.
Puffs and curls are arranged from
back to front instead of following the
line of the brow, and the dressing is
done very softly and with a strong
bias In favor of the side parting.
There are no longer any coils show
ing on the top of the head, but the
back is covered with puffs so soft and
flat that they look like waves.
Dress Notes.
Ribbons with the picot edge ar
new, and it is usually very much eas
ier to twist a crush belt out of them
than to make one out of a pleee ma
terial. Then gold and sliver tissue stock
ings worn with strapped shoes rich
ly jeweled at the toe and along th
strap are a feature of the eveninj
dress outfit Bright colors, prlncipallj
emerald, cerise, blue and a rich ton
j of rose, are much in evidence.