Newspaper Page Text
THE CHANUTE TIMES.
A. H. Turner, Ed. & Prop. CHANUTE KAN3. Why doesn't an Ice floe flow There seema to be lo kind of Insect powder tnat Is fatal to humbugs. The forty Immortals have slid back Into obscurity, and all Is forgiven. There never before was a time when the world had so many ex-potentates. The peach crop promises to be big enough for cholera morbus pur poses. Other seeds may be higher thl year, but seeds of kindness will cost no more. What a pity that the average man has no place to store away Ice for a dusty day! A 27-pound lobster has been caught at Atlantic City. It was not accom panied by a chorus girl. It was with difficulty that Lake Michigan was kept from freezing from shore to shore this winter. Somebody has said "we are what we at." We doubt It especially when we eat boiled cabbage and turnips. Doctors saved the life of a New York man whose neck was broken. But he will still have to live In New York. China Invented fireworks a good many hundred years before it had an Independence day to explode them on. Automatic starters may be all right itor automobiles, but they would never Jo to set a political campaign in mo tion, i Though a Minnesota man caught a ton of fish with his handB, others have made greater catches with their Imag inations. The couple who get married in a fly ing machine evidently do not desire elaborate ceremonies Just a plane wedding. Fashion notes make It easy to fore tell that ladles' hats will be high and pocketbooks retain their usual shape of flatness. Golf balls are to be cheaper. But we cannot paraphrase Marie Antoin ette and eat golf balls if we can't have bread. We await anxiously the time when the little ex-Emperor Pu Yl will be gin making attempts to come back. They all do it A gun made of cement Is one of the latest devices for war purposes. It is dangerous to stand either at the mus cle or the breech. We take oft our hat to the pulmotor, which not only draws suicides back from the dark shore, but patches up their lovers' quarrels. The Massachusetts man who has been on the operating table thirty-five times may be merely trying to estab lish a reputation as a cut-up. Don't boast, even If you did have eggs for breakfast. The man to whom you feel so superior may have had butter on his Johnnycake. A New York surgeon 6ays the ver miform appendix fulfills an important function. He Is, of course, speaking from the surgeon's standpoint Those Manchurlan princes do not make any pretenses to the effect that they -stepped out of power In order to devote more time to the uplift A near scientist tells us that when ever a man tells a lie bis big toe wiggles. There must be some enthu siastic wiggling on the bathing beaches In summer. The death of Lord Lister, who dis covered antiseptic surgery and has saved the lives of thousands, recalls the fact that he was not placed in the list of the twenty greatest A Connecticut bank has gone to the wall because Its books had not-been balanced for forty years. It seems, therefore, that the balancing of bank books is Important, after all. A prominent dentist Informs us that false teeth are more sanitary than real ones, but the man who knocks out his fellow man's teeth is not necessarily looked upon as a philanthropist A New Jersey woman is suing for damages because after a . surgical operation a pair of forceps was sewed up inside her. She is lucky not to have the price of the instrument charged against Its loss in her bllL The Palace of Peace at The Hague will he completed in July of next year. The work is not being hurried. A Boston highbrow tells us that If he bad created the world he would have made every woman beautiful. And what would the beauty doctor do then, poor thing T Now society for promoting effi ciency has been launched. One of the ways of doing It would be to waste less time on forming fool organlx-tlons. BENJAMIN IDE WHEELER President Wheeler as head of Cali fornia university Is the highest sal aried head of any state Institution of learning In the United 8tatea, Hie salary la $12,000 a year. BROKEN RAIL WAS RESPONSIBLE Twenty-Five Injured When Chicago Great Western Train Left Track on Curve. Dunkerton, Iowa. Twenty-five pen sons were injured, 13 severely and one probably fatally, In a wreck of Chi cago Great Western railroad passen ger train from St. Paul to Kansas City, three miles east of here at an early hour in the morning. The train struck a broken rail on a curve. Fourteen passengers were taken to a hospital in Waterloo. The most dangerously injured pas senger is A. E. Brand of Des Moines. Three Pullmans and a day coach left the track. Among those most seriously hurt are: James Larson, St. Joseph; Timothy Loley, Des Moines; George Hall, Nevada, la.; Mrs. Edward Mclntire, St. Paul; E. L. Jones, Minneapolis, Minn.; J. E. Landholt, New York; John Youngblood, Amarlllo, Tex.; H. E. Sinerhous, St. Paul; L. E. Pal meter, Kansas City. FIRED AT KING VICTOR EMANUEL Ruler Was Unharmed and Anarchist Who Attempted His Life Is Captured. Rome, Italy. An attempt was made to kill King Victor Emanuel. Sev eral shots were fired at the king, but all missed. The assailant, an anarch ist, was arrested. The attempt on the king's life was made as the monarch and Queen Helena were going from the Quirlnal palace to the Pantheon to take part in the annual memorial service in memory of the late King Humbert. The procession was passing along the Via Lata when three shots were fired from amid the crowd. Soldiers, dashed up to the royal car riage, where they found the king and queen sitting calm and unmoved. The crowd seized the man who fired the shots and attempted to lynch him. GOOD ROAD TRAIN FOR KANSAS Lecturers From Agricultural College to Start From Topeka for Week's Trip. Manhattan, Kan. The heavy snowe of 1912 have given the farmers of Kansas a valuable lesson In the neces sity for good roads. Farmers are go ing to lose a lot of money in the next few weeks because of poor roads. But many of them will not know it be cause they have never figured it out The Kansas state agricultural college is going to figure It out for them and drive the lessons home by demonstra tion. Lecturers from the agricultural col lege will start out Monday morning with the "Good Road Special" over the Santa Fe. The start will be made from Topeka and Btops of an average of 40 minutes will he made at 75 towns, the trip ending Saturday night A Woman Slain by WolvesT Hancock, Michigan. Mrs. Selma Markkinen, wife of a farmer living near Ilston, is believed t have been killed and eaten by wolves. She set out on skis to return home from a neighboring farm, but did not arrive, and searchers found her skis and parts of her clothing In the snow. Nearby were tracks indicating the presence of a large pack of wolves. Irish Girls Now. Peabody, Kansas. They're hearing now in Ireland of the fine young men In Kansas who are wanting wives. From Miss Mary MeCombe of the County Tyrone, W. E. Payton, editor of the Peabody Herald, has received a letter asking If there are any eligi ble young men left. Messenger Kills Two Robbers. San Antonio, Tex. David A. Trous dale, a young express messenger, brought the attempted robbery of a Southern Pacific train to a sudden climax when he trapped the two rob bers and killed both of them. Aeroplanes Met Head-On. Berlin, Germany. A collision took place between two aeroplanes a ma chine carrying a passenger striking violently another- aeroplane. Both the aeroplanes were smashed and fell, only the passenger being Injured. GRADUALLY GETTING IN BAD THREE MOUNTAINEERS TAKEN SLAYERS OF VIRGINIA JUDGE MADE DESPERATE FIGHT. Wife of One Shot While Helping Her Husband Court Already Reorganized. Hlllsvllle, Va. Rushing in force up on the cabin housing Floyd Allen, the desperado whose conviction here resulted in a band of his outlaw followers killing Judge Massie, the county prosecutor, and the Carroll county sheriff, 25 detectives arrested Allen, his son, 'Victor, and hustled them to the county jail both wound ed severely. Sidna Allen's wife is dead, shot in a fight with a posse in the mountains while helping defend her husband. Another member of the band, James Strickland Was heav ily armed and declared that if he had not been taken by surprise he would have fought to the death to prevent the capture of Allen. Allen, soon af ter being put In jail, slashed his throat with a razor in an endeavor to commit suicide. All the other members of the gang, probably 18, are up in the mountains off toward the North Carolina line, well armed, well supplied and deter mined not to be taken. The storming of Sidna Allen's house late in the day was the next thing to a bombardment. From behind stumps, rocks, trees and other natural fortresses of the mountainside, the posse fired at the house and Allen fired at the posse as fast as the women of his family could reload his rifles. In a lull the posse rushed the house and broke down the doors. Excitement Is Intense in and about Hillsville, as Gov. Mann has offered a reward of $1,000 for every man en gaged In the shooting, the nren to be brought in dead or alive. Other de tectives are certain to follow the rounding up of the gang. Judge Staples, designated by Gov. Mann to come here to hold court, took the bench and summoned a special grand jury to indict the murderers. That one act had more to do with the restoration of quiet than any other. Reorganization of the court which was all but wiped out by the work of assassins had a great In fluence. AFTER REPUBLICAN CONVENTION Independence Sends Big Delegation to Topeka to Capture the Prize. Topeka, Kan. Independence wants the Republican state convention this year. C. H. Kerr, representative In the. last legislature, came to Topeka ahead of a big delegation of Mont gomery county business men and poli ticians who will attend the Repub lican state committee meeting and ask that the state convention be called for Independence. Independ ence is the only town that has asked for the convention, but Topeka will be a candidate and Wichita also. Women Leave Torreon. San Antonio, Texas. In the belief that a decisive battle between rebels and federals is likely soon and that it will be fought at Torreon, Mexico, 3.000 refugees, mostly women and children, are en route north from there. ' Rear End Crash Kills Two. Albuquerque, New Mexico. Three are dead, five missing and a score or more injured as a result of a rear end collision between a westbound extra freight and a work train on the Santa Fe coast line at McCarthy's, N. M., 60 miles west of here. Best Applet In Andrew County. Columbia, Missouri. The best soil in the United States for the growing of apples Is at Savannah, Mo., accord ing to Prof. W. L. Howard of the col lege of agriculture, who has just re turned from there. Oklahoma Bank Robbed. Enid, Oklahoma. All of the money In the safe of the Farmers' bank at Lambert, amounting to $3,500, was stolen. The robbers demolished the brick vault, damaged the building greatly and escaped. KILLED WARDEN AND ESCAPED! Nebraska! Three Desperate Men in Prison Make Bold Dash for Liberty. Lincoln, Neb. Three men dead and a fourth dangerously wounded Is the toll of a murder plot, cunningly de vised and daringly executed at the Nebraska penitentiary, four miles south of the city. After running with pistols througti the prison, shooting down all who dis puted-their path, and shattering with nitroglycerin the steel doors which stood between them and freedom, the murderers, three long time convicts, fled on foot through the deep snow drifts, and are pursued by a dozen posses. The men murdered are: James Delahunty, warden; Henry Wagner, deputy warden; G. Heilnian, usher. Thomas Doody, prison guard, was wounded. The killing of the three prison au thorities was done by Charles Taylor and John Dowd, bank robbers, and Charles Morley, convicted of highway robbery. Firearms, a supply of am munition and the explosive, mysteri ously smuggled into the prison, were in possession of the trio. Taylor, apparently the ring leader In the desperate flight, is an expert cracksman of bank safes and known by police all over the West. SEVENTH REGIMENT TO MARCH Hike of 117 Miles From Leavenworth Arranged to Test Proposed New Shoes. Washington, D. C An entire regi ment, the seventh Infantry, will tramp 117 miles in the near future to put to a practical test the "modified shoe," a new type of army footwear evolved by a board of officers ap pointed to Investigate innumerable complaints against the shoes now is sued to soldiers. On the march, which will be made from Fort Leav enworth, Kan., one-third of the men will wear the "modified," one-third the regulation marching shoe, and the remainder the present garrison shoe. The board will be along to see the test of its theories upon every conceivable variety of feet. If the new shoe Is adopted, consid erable economy would result. Instead of having to buy different shoes for garrison, marching and dress, the sol dier would get along with a pair, of black and a pair of tan shoes of the same kind. TRIED TO BRIBE A GRAND JURY Syracuse, Kan., Man Fined In Federal Court Echo of Naftzger Case. Wichita, Kansas. George W. Smith of Syracuse, Kan., entered a plea of nole contendre before Judge John C. Pollock of the federal court here on a charge of attempting to bribe the grand jury that indicted I. S. Naftz ger, former president of the Fourth National bank In this city, 18 months ago. Smith was fined $100, with 50 costs. Xaftger was charged with disposing of stolen postage stamps for John Callahan, the bank and post ofllce robber, now serving time In the federal penitentiary at Leavenworth, Kan. Robbers Ruined Bank Vault. Enid, Oklahoma. All of the money In the safe pf the Fanners' bank at Lambert, amounting to $3,500, was stolen, according to the cashier's re port to Secretary Harrison of the Bankers' association. The robbers de molished the brick vault, damaged the building greatly and escaped. Packers' Plea Failed. Chicago, Illinois. Judge Carpenter declined to take from the jury the case of the ten Chicago packers charged with conspiracy in restraint of trade under the Sherman law and discharge the defendants. Parole for Boy. Jefferson City, Mo. Gov. Hadley granted a parole to Frederick Tate, 16 years old, who plead gul'.ty in Franklin county last July to the theft of a typewriter. and was sentenced to the penitentiary for two years. NO OBJECTIONS FROM TONY "Lovable Little Chap" Probably Would Not Have Minded a Succes sion of Tunnels. Being Sunday evening, and the races having taken place that afternoon, the trains were packed. In one compart ment a little boy had been standing all the way, but before the journey had proceeded much farther Mrs. Jones kindly took him on her knee. "Were you very frightened, dear, as we passed throught the tunnel?" the gentle lady asked. "Not much," replied the little boy Bhyly. ' "But I thought you trembled a little as I kissed you," remarked Mrs. Jones, who was not even middle-aged, yet. "And what's your name?" "Tony," came the answer. Then you're a very lovable little chap! And how old are you?" "Twenty-five, ma'am." And Tony Spurs, the lightweight jockey, slid to the floor to the accom paniment of a piercing scream. An swers. Sad Excuse. They were twitting a friend who stuttered upon the fact that he had never been married. "I kn-kn-know, boys, that I've never b-b-been married, but I was pre-pre-pretty near it once." "How was that?" they inquired. "Well, vou see. I ask-ask-asked a glrl t0 hav-hav-have me, and she said mac sne u rattier ue eA-ej-iuocu, uu I was such a fo-fo-fool, I ex-ex-excused her." 1 Summer Wear. Patrick worked for a notoriously i stingy boss and lost no chance to i let the fact be known. Once a wag gish friend, wishing to twit him, re marked: "Pat, I hear your boss Just gave you a brand-new suit of clothes." "No," said Pat, "only par-rt of a suit." "What part?" "The sleeves iv the vest!" Some people love to tell the truth when they think it will hurt. When Your Eyes Need Care Try Murine Eve remedy. No Smarting Feels Fiiie Acts yulolily. Try It or Red, Weak, WiLirrv Even mid (Jmuulated Ertlids. Illus trated Book in eni'h Package. Murine Is componndi'd by onr Oculists not a "Pntnit Mi-d-I Iclne " but nsed In surcsssfnl Physicians' i'rac- mnns vul-R NnW florttrntPfl to tUfl PllD- lie and Bold u DrugKlsts at 26c and 6Uo per Bottle. Murine Kje rSulve lu Aseptic Tubes, 26o and Mc. Murine Eye Remedy Co., Chicago Many a man can't afford to dress well because his wife does. Pink Eye" Is Epidemic In the Spring:. Try Murine Eye Remedy for Reliable Belief. But it takes a woman to keep a secret she doesn't know. Every one Is liRble to a bilious attack. Be futeuruied with a package of Gartield Tea. Some men give a dollar with one hand and grab two with the other. likl 'to. K ALCOHOL-3 PER CENT AVegefable Preparation for As similating the Food and Regula ting the Stomachs and Bowels of mi Promotes DigcstioaChecrfuI nessandRest.Contains neither Opium .Morphine nor Mineral Not Nahc otic XWpr 9f0td DrSAJWElffnWER ft Pumpkin Anist Snd ftppermimi Hirm Sed ft at 19! CP fr'JI i RpmpHv fnrConslioa- linn . mir Stomach.Diarrhoea Worms .Convulsions .Feverish- AS nessand LOSS OF SLEEP Facsimile Signature of The Centaur Company. - NEW YORK. 6? 1 Guaranteed under the Foodanfl Exact Copy of Wrapper. L ARTEMUS OUTDONfc. "Who "says there are no women humorists?" "I don't know. Why?" "My typewriter spells as funnily as Artemus Ward in his palmiest days." Small Encouragement. Kate They say a woman Is as old as she looks. Maud Never mind, dear; we all know you are only twenty-six. TRIED REMEDY FOR THE GRIP. FOR OLD AND Y01NG Tutt'f Liver Pills act as kindly on the child, the delicate female or Infirm old age, as upon the vigorous man. give tone and strength to the weak stomach, bowels, kldneya and bladder. , TH E NEW FRENCH REMEDY. No.l.No 2. No.3. THERAPION hoCSwuS CURAT ;U'RS8, (MRUS K1UNKY. HLA OltKR I1I8KABE8, PILES. CHRONIC l'I.CF.RS,8KIS ERUPTIONS KITHKR 8RX Rrnit iMrn mv.ln, for FRKK bnnkl.l lo lR. I.K CLF.RO LKD. CO., HAVKRSTOCK Rl., HAUPHTKAU, LONUUN, ENG. Beat Cough Sjrmp. Tarte Good. Ut in time. Bold by DrafUtitU. For Infants and Children. ajsMHsfBMsMsMsMWsMBs(1 The Kind You Have Always Bought In Use For Over Thirty Years orTEAyoui LIP3X)N Si ir coiPiB iot's r Bears the 9 Signature A$ IF IF TNI WTfcUH QOWMWY. WW VO ITT. i .1" ; l If A