THE HUTCHINSON GAZETTE
THE CAZETTE PUBLISHINO AND PR1NTIMO CO
Ui A. Borrow, H. S. FotT,
E'JTCHlnsoa, : : MUSIS.
we ot tho most wonderful (acta of
the present apa is the way actors con
tinue to remain "young American
tragedians' until tlioy are past u.
It is said that Jay Gould dislikes
railroad travel ng. Perhaps he is
afraid of being drowned. He well
knows the amount of water on the'
A man can tjet gloriously drunk in
Japan for 20 cents. This Is why the
wapano.se wno come k America aave
Choir money and take it home with
Instructor in Rhetoric Give an ex
ample of a syllogism. Logical Fresh'
man A 1 men are moro or less alike,
I am a man; therefore I am more or
"Terrible railroad accident yostor.-
day, wasn't itP" "Hadn't heard of it,'
what whs it?" "The X road, you
hnow it?" "Yes, well?" "It paid a
The aim of Chineso parents is to so
tuior ineir noys inut u uuu ui muiu
happens to sit down on an eight-ounce
tack in the presunco ol company no
won't even bob up.
There are only two occasions when
a man linos out wuat an atrocious vu
lian he is. The lir.st is when he runs
for the aldermanship of his ward, and
the second is when his wifo sues him
"I have never given you credit for
Knowing very much, mauani, sum a
blunt old bachelor, "but " "Sir,"
she interrupted, "do you wish to in-
eult " "But," he continued, "I
imvo always udmired your grace and
beauty." "I accept your apology,"
said the lady.
Frenchman (to Kentucky citizen)
"Ven zo friend ssk you zu invito to
take ze drink viskey, vat you say in
AnnlnisP" Kentucky Citizen "Don't
care if 1 do." "JJonoar lido, oui! But
ven you refuse ze invito, zen vat you
say in Anglais?" "Well er-I guess
you've got me now, Frenchy."
"My doar," said a frightened hus
band m the middle of the night shak
ing his wife, "whero did you put that
bottle of strychnine?" "On the shelf,
next to the peppermint" "O, Lord!"
ho graoued, "I've swallowed it."
"Well, for goodness' sake," whispor
ed his wife, "keep quiet, or you'll
wake the baby."
Did your story win tho prize?" "No,
but it came uear winning it. It fail
ed only in one stipulation." "And
what was that?" "it was to have tho
editor's hair stand on ond."' "Oh, I
see. It wasn't exciting enough."
"Yes, it was." "Tnen why didn't it
make the editor's hair stand on end?"
'Ho hadn't any. He was bald head
ed." At an evening party Dumloy was in
troduced to a young lady, and after a
remark about the weather he said,
gallantly: "Aud have I really tho
pleasure of mooting tho beautiful
Jkliss Smith, whose praises aro hoing
sounded by everybody?" "Oh, no,
Mr. JJumley," the lady ropliod; "the
boautilul Miss huiitii to whom you re
fer is a cousin of mine." "Ob. that's
it. Woll, 1 thought there must be a
mistake somewhere," said the gallant
Du in ley.
A Fellow to bo Trusted "What do
you tli. nk of liliffk ns, Brown?"
"I'rotty fair sort of a chap in his way,
I believe." "Do you know him well?"
"Oil, yes; I am very woll acquainted
with him, indeed." "A ad you con
sider h m a man to bo trustod?" "No
doubt of it." "What do you base
your opinion upon?" "Personal 'ix
peneueo." "How's that?" "Woll, I
began trusting Blitlkins shortly after
1 became acquainted with him, and I
am trusting linu still."
Gentleman I am sorry to learn of
your who's death. Uncle" Rastus. Un
cle Kra.itus Sail? Gentleman I say
that I am sorry to hear that your wife
' h.is recently died. Uncle U.istus (with
a puzzled look) I giss da' am some
iniBtake 'bout dat, Mistah Brown. 1
lef du ule ouui.in iu gud health dis
mawnin', suit. Who said sho wah
dead? Gentleman--I've forgotten
now. Uueleliastus (his faco clearing
up) Oh, yu'as, now I understun's,
sah. D it wujs vr formah wife ob mine,
llisttih Urowu. She died ino'n foah
weeks ago. De present incumbent am
Little Ernest, a small boy recently
emancipated from kills, walked into
the nui'iiery one morning and was
quito disgusieJ upon tin ding that it
bad not been put iu order for the day
one of the rules of the houso being
that uo playthings should be brought
out until the sweeping was done. He
leit the room tor a short time, and
lindiug matters no better on his return
exclaimed, impatiently : "Well, hasn't
this room beeusweepodyet?" "Why,
Ernest," said his ino.fier, "do yiiu
tli nk that is good gramiuer?" "Oh
well, then," said he, "has il been
In an Arkansas town, several nights
ago, a mob, led by a desperate man,
marched to the jail, dragged a mur
derer Irom tiio cell, and hurried with
him to tho outskirts of the town.
Each man wore an expression of de
term nation features hardened by
awful resolve. The prisoner attempt
ed to speak, to beg lor his life, but the
burly hands closed around his throat,
and the prayer bo would have uttered
went out in an inarticulate gurglo.
When the infuriated men reached a
large oak they halted. One of them
threw a rope over a limb, "(ieutlo
men," said the prisoner, "please give
me a chance to say a word." "Be
quick about it," xoiue one shoutod.
"Gentlen en, I admit that llio evidence
is against me, but, as truly as we
Stand here, 1 killed that man in self
duien.se." "Killed what man?" was
asked. "Bill Bottlelord." "You
ain't the man that killed Bottleford,
are you'" "Yes, unfortunately, I am
tun man." "Men," shouted the lead--er,
"we have come within one of mak
ing a terril le mistake." Then turn
ing to the prisoner the lender addod:
"We thought, sir, that you were the
man that stolo Nat Boyd's H-h trap.
Hop down oion the box. You are
HAPPENINGS IN KANSAS.
ITEMS Oh INTEREST TO DWEL
LERS IN THE SUNFLOWER.
The Week's Itenew of Personal and
General News Condensed to Short
Paragraphs for the Con renlence of
The Turners have a largo and grow
Ing society at Ft Scott
Millard Turner was horribly man.
gled at Emporia Saturday in a saw
mill and had both arms amputated be
low the elbow and one le? above the
knee. He came here from Ada, O.,
whero his relatives still reside.
Tho report of Paymaster Mapes, of
Kansas City. Kans., for the year end-
in.fr March 1, shows the receipts to
havo been 147,957.44, which is an In.
crease SI, 001.11 over tho previous year,
The total expenses amounted to $31,
10X99, leaving1 a net profit of 810,
At a session Saturday afternoon tho
connty commissioners of Bourbon
county appropriated J200 for the es.
tablishment of a chinch Bug station at
Fort Scott this spring, and after con
sidering1 three applications Robert
Bright was employed at a salary of
A mine report from Galena for last
week says: "Ihsre was a total of 1,
580,000 pounds of zinc ore sold. The
price remained the same as the week
prior, $19 for tho top and an average
of 817 per ton. Value $14,430. There
was a total of 350,000 pounds of lead
sold at $10 per thousand. Total value
of sales, $19,030."
The sad iron manufacturing plant of
Independence, is rapidly approaching
completion. Tho company have or
dercd new machinery to the amount
of $3,280, and it is expected to arrive
by the first of the week, by which
time tho building will be completed
and ready to receivo it It is thought
that everything will be in readiness to
commence work by May 1.
In his irrigation lectures to the Law
rence Y. M. C. A., Judge Emery stated
that 10 per cent of the families of this
country live in tenements. There are
30,000 more tenant farmers in Kansas
to-day than ten years ago. Only 5 per
cent of the population are owners to
any considerable extent Ho urged
young men starting out in life to be
come home owners; to be independent;
buy a small piece of land while its
price is steadily advancing.
Department Commander Harris re
ceived a Cincinnati paper which con
tains an interview with Governor Mc
Kinley In regard to his Western trip,
m which the Governor says: "The
only trip that I will inalto this year
that I know of at tho present will bo
at Ottawa, Kansas, to participate in a
gathering of cx-unlon veterans. Tho
Western trip which has been so kindly
announced for mo will not be made."
Governor McKinley will be at Ottawa
The next annual session of the dem
ocratic editorial fraternity of Kansas
will be hcli at Leavenworth on Sat
urday, May 11, commencing at 10
o'clock a. m. The meeting was called
for Saturday, but it had to bo post
poned on account of tho illness of
.Mrs. Frank T. Lynch, of the Leaven
worth Standard. Mrs. Lynch is vice
president of the fraternity. Barney
J. Sheridan ot the Paola Spirit, is tho
The Quantrcll raid monument com
mittee, at a meeting to make arrange
ments for the unveiling of the monu
ment at Lawrence on Decoration Day,
appointed Paul It. Brooks and Gurdon
(irosvenor to confer with tho members
of theG. A. R to arrange joint com
memoration exercises on tho day of
tho unveiling. An invitation was ex
tended to lion. James Horton of Kan
sas City, who was there during the
raid, to be present Tho monument
is to cost $1,500, and is to bo shipped
from Vermont on May 20.
Claim hns been mndo against the
Western Union Telegraph company
at Fort Scott for 500 damages for the
erroneous transmission of a message
sent from there March 21. Tho mes
sage which was in regard to tho sale
of a valuablo piece of property, was
sent by Garrison Brothers to C II. Pe
terson of Cambridge, III., and, was us
follows: "Can make trade. ' When
received by Peterson it read "Can't
make trade," and as a result tho saio
was lost Five hundred dollars they
allege would have licen the amount of
their commission on the sale.
The family of A. D. Whitson, who
live near Hackney, were treated to a
big surpriso by finding a littlo girl
baby snugly tucked in a market bask
et and placed on their porch. Early
in the mcrning, while the stars were
yet shining, a young lady member of
tho family stepped out onto the porch
and discovered the basket but as a
noise, indicating life, came from be
neath tho basket cover, she was too
frightened to examine it, but ran back
Into tbe house and raised the alarm.
Tho only mark about which the child
or wrapping which might form a clue
to the owner is tho cost mark on the
box holding the nursing bottle.
The Fort Scott public library com
mittee has received a check from En
gene F. Ware, for $100 to be used in
the magazine department
Joseph Hayden, one of the oldest
residents of Coffeyville, Kansas, and
a leading member of the G. A. R, fell
dead in a restaurant there of heart
disease Wednesday night
The executive committee of the Kan
sas State editorial association held a
meeting at Topcka and decided to ac
cept the Invitation extended to the
Kansas editors to attend the Atlanta
exposition next October.
The total expense for tbe Wichita
Are department for tho last two years
was $39,0C0, of which $31,000 Was for
The latest report of Superintendent
Kendrick shows an enrollment in the
publio schools of Junction city of
A special convention of the Episco
pal diocese of Kansas has been called
to meet iu Topeka May 28 to elect a
Arbor day was not neglected at the
Soldiers' home at Dodge City; 500
fruit trees are there that were not
J. n. Snyder, a farmer living near
Hiawatha, took his life Thursday,
cutting himself with an ax and shoot
ing himself with a gun.
Mabel Benton, tho 16-year-old daught
er of C. M. Benton of Effingham, was
severely burned Saturday morning
while burning some rubbish at her
home. Her clothes were burned al
most off before she could be rescued.
The people of Ottawa very sensibly
destroyed the pest house before any
body else could be taken to it Civil
ized people do not want their friends
or relatives taken from their homes
and put in such a place as the average
The removal of the tariff duty on
eggs does not seem to have affected
the industry in the west very serious
ly after all. S. R Hunt, of Peabody,
last week shipped a car load of eggs
to Boston, right under tho noses of
tho Canadians as it were.
The annual convention of tho Kan
sas State Sundav School association
will be held this year at Salina, May
7, 8 and 9. Tho music to be in charge
of Professor Exeell of Chicago. The
leading Sunday School workers of 111
inois, Missouri and Kansas are upon
Sheriff Glover of Olathe, captured a
noted crook and horsethief, William
Fisher, who is over 00 years old, near
thero Thursday. Fisher stole a valu-
ble horse and buggy from C C Doug.
lass, a leading merchant of Kansas
City, and was endeavoring to sell the
stolen property when arrested.
An excellent quality of clay for
modeling purposes has been discover
ed in Geary county, and Miss Lizzie
Robart has been untilizing it An at
tractive display of fruits and flowers
made from this clay and colored by
this young lady, adorns the windows
of a Junction City business house.
Wra. Ratliff, who supplies Ft Riley,
with milk, after trying some of the
most highly recommended families of
milk stock, has decided to go back to
the Short Horns as the most profitable
all around. He is also making some
experiments in feed and will try flax
seed meal mixed with bran.
Poodle Tofte, Will Plunkctt and
Fritz Toftc, were arrested at an early
hour Sunday morning for holding up
a farmer named Ore at Atchl.-on and
robbing him of $75. The money was
not found on the footpads, but it was
subsequently learned that Poodle
Tofto had left $05 with the night tele
graph operator at the Union depot
Tho Juvenile Literary Society of
Cedarvalo presents an example of rer-
sistenee in a good cause worthy of
emulation. They have been giving
ice cream sojials and entertainments
of various kinds for three years tor
tho purpose of raising funds to main
tain a public school library. They
now have 51 volumes.
Mulching has been recommended
for a great many kiuds of plants, but
a Barton county farmer is perhaps the
first to opply tho system to wheat
Early last winter he hauled a lot of
straw and spread over his wheat field,
and tho result is that his crop is in ex
cellent condition, while that of manv
of his neighbors was destroyed wholly
or in part by the severe weather.
The colored Baptists of 'Douglas
county held a four days' bible insti
tute in Lawrence last week. There
were a number of prominent divines
of tho state in attendance, and the in
stituto was conducted oy Rev. W. L.
Grant, assisted by State Evangelist
Ueasley and Eov. A. S. Green. The
nstitute continued till Sunauy when
18 converts were baptized in tbe Kan
Miss nelen E. Price, formerly of El
Dorado, was married September 26
lust to Howard Ribiuit'.ky of Washing
ton, but Washington knew nothing of
t until Saturday, as she feared she
would lose her place as copyist if the
arriuge was discovered. She was a
protege of tho lato Senator Perkins.
Tho marriage was known from the
first by her father, W. M. Price, and
lie rest of the family who live at El
Tho exclnvtre distinction of possess
ing class yells no longer rests with tho
eoUcgo boys. It has been taken up
by the hitrh schoo's, and it is evident
ly only a question of time until the
air of Kausai will be rent by 9,000
additional sepcrate and distinct class
vers, one for each district school.
Here is ono adopted by the graduating
class of the Chffeyville high schhol:
Trilby, dilby, diddledive, Coffeyville
high school, class '93.".
Every Abilene man in the peniten
tiary is either foreman or bookkeeper.
Half the wheat In Geary county
looks well; tho big East end especial
ly The State Board of Publio Works
has elected L. U. Lescher of Topeka
to be Stats architect, succeeding 8ey.
mour Davis. Mr. Lesher is a demo
crat He was the choice of Michael
Ileery, the Democratic member of the
board. Captain Seaton and Sol Miller
were unable to agree on a Repablieun
so they voted for I eery 's candidate
The position is worth $2,500 a year.
What Is Done In the Camp and Where
the Syrup Is Handled.
A properly conducted maple-sugar
camp in Vermont is well worth seeing,
Many improvement? have been intro
duced during the last few years. In
tho center of the "orchard," or "bush,"
as it used to be called, is a commodious
and well-equipped sugar-house, in
which all the utensils are stored when
not in use. The process of sugar-mak
ing, as now conducted, is practically
as follows: First, two or three men
tap the trees. One goes ahead, and
with a three-inch bit, makes an incis
ion about an inch deep on the lee side
of the tree. A second man inserts a
round, double tin spile, or spout, about
three inches long in the aperature. The
spout not only conducts the sap, but
has an arrangement for suspending
the bucket beneath it. Lastly, a man
hangs the buckets, which are either of
wood or tin. Gathering the sap has
been much simplified. The old way
was to hitch a team of stout horses to
a short sled carrying the "holder," a
large wooden tub, holding several bar
rels, in which the sap in the buckets
was poured. Now leaders or wooden
gutters are all run through the orchard.
emptying into a large storage tank at
the sugar house. In a brick framework
In the sugar-house is set an iron arch
with a square Iron chimney. For a
large orchard of 2,000 trees the arch Is
about 5x20 feet in area, 2 feet deep in
front, and 10 Inches deep in the chim
ney end. In the arch are set the evap
orators, a deep boiling pan in front
and four smaller and shallower pans
further back. The : bottoms of the
evaporatorg are deeply corrugated,
nearly doubling the surface exposed to
the heat. The boiling is done rapidly,
as rapid boiling improves the quality
of the sugar. The sap flows from tho
tank through a hose with a strainer at
tached into a regulator, which allows
only a certain quantity to flow into the
evaporator. At a certain point the sap
is drawn by a siphon from the large
evaporator into one of the small ones,
the scum and settling being left be
hind. In the last pan the liquid is
evaporated to the syrup of commerce,
weighing eleven pounds to the gallon.
The most interesting process is "sugar
ing off." The syrup is slowly boiled In
the large pan until the experienced
sugar-maker knows it is "done." The
pan is then lifted off, and the mass Is
turned into tubs, holding from ten to a
hundred pounds. If it is to be made
into cakes, it is stirred longer, till it be
comes dry enough to retain its shape.
The whiteness of maple syrup does not
determine its price. It is due some
what to the differences of soil and the
amount of rain that has fallen into the
sap. Pure maple sugar is a brownish
amber in color, with a fine grain. If
the grain is not fine, and if there are
air holes in it it has probably been
adulterated by cane sugar, glucose or
clay by some wicked dealer, says the
sugar-maker. The average yield per
tree is about two pounds per season,
the season lasting from four to six
weeks, until frosty nights cease and
the buds begin to swell, when the sap
tastes strong and ceases to flow.
RIGHT UP TO DATE.
What May no Expected as a Result ot
the Trance Fad.
Now that hypnotism Is in the air,
Punch says, our conversation books will
have to be remodeled, as thus:
Good morning. Have you hibernated
Yes, I have had a most successful
trance this winter. Have you laid up
Only a few days at Christmas, Just
to escape the bills.
Well, you take my advice, old man,
and rent a private catacomb on the
three years' system. It comes much
cheaper in the end, and you save all
your coal and gas, to say nothing of
We've started a Nirvana club in our
neighborhood on the tontine principle.
The last person who wakes gets tho
prize, unless the first who comes to
makes off with it.
It is capital anyway when you are
making a tour. Saves all the trouble
of sight-seeing. You are just packed
up and forwarded from place to place
with an automatic kcdal:, which re
cords everything you visited. Try it!
Will, some day. By Jove, I must bo
off! I've got to attend an anesthetic
concert, absolutely painless.
And I've got a mesmeric dinner party
on to-night. All the bores will be put
in glass cases and fed mechanically.
Good bye, then. Sleep well!
An Augusta man say3 ho recently
stopped in a village whero the hotel had
two large rooms, one for the men and
one for the ladles. Half of each room
was made into beds. Ke said there
was a sign hung out on the porch which
read: "Persons wishing to take a bath
will please notify Mr. Jones a half
hour beforehand, so that he can have
the creek dammed up. Atlanta Consti
The lighthouses of the world num
ber more than 7,000. The United States
has over 1,300 houses and as man
posts. The latter are simpler in con
struction and not very expensive, since
they are maintained on shore. The an
nual appropriation for their keeping Is
now nearly $4,000,000.
The Caralyptn Tren.
The eucalyptus tree, which is being
plRnted extensively in California for
windbreaks and other purposes, grows
to a height of fifty feet in three years
after the seed Is planted. When raised
for cordwood and cut once every fifth
year it brings about $50 an acre.
We import millions of eggs,
A Krup gun costs $900 a ton. -A
Paris store has 4,000 hands. ' ,
Board is six cents a day in India.
Utah Is to have a German colony.
If the Baby Is Cattla leeta,
B ran and OM tli t old and well-tried remedy, KM.
Wdulow's Soomuia Stilt fur Children Teething.
Lockport (N. Y.) saloon-keepers
serve goat stew for free lunches.
Heceman'e Camphor lee with Glycerine.
Curee Chapped Hands and Face, Tender or Sore Feet
Chilblain, rUee, Aa. C. O. Clark Co.. Mew Hareo, Ct
Governor Hughes of Arizona, has ap
pointed twelve newspaper men to act
as a board of immigration commission
ers. The Qovernor is himself a news
Is such a trial that men say, "Let the
bouse tuka care ot itself." But the con
scientious wife feels bound to risk health
and strength in this annual struggle with
dust and dirt. The eonssquence of her
feverish anxiety over extra work is de
pletion of the blood, the source of
all life and strength, manifested in that
weak, tired, nervous condition too prev
alent tt this season and very dangerous
If allowed to continue. What every man
and woman needs In the spring is Hood's
BarsaparlUa. It keeps the blood vitalized
is the Only
True Blood Purifier
n n firTr 'if 'it "
makes wash-day as easy as any other day. Lessens
the labor, makes the clothes white, and does no dam
age. Thousands of women say so surely they are
not all mistaken. Sold everywhere. Made only by
The N. K. Fairbank Company, - St. Louis.
Ycpy Latest Styles,
39 Cent Patterns for 10 Cents. Wiei
LADISS' BASQCa LADIES' BASQUB WAIST.
This counon sent with an order (or one or nnv of our :5 cent patterns Is
credited as 'S tents, milking the pattern cot ouly 10 cents.
One cent extra tor pontKe for eiit-h pattern. Give nrrotipr of Inches waist
measure for .kins and number of lmbes bunt measure for waists.
LOCK BOX 744,
EWIS' 9d LYE
f The itrmc
f ,14 made. Unilki
TrTA. fine powder
'A ifWltu removal
are alwijn r.
ttronoett and ft'irst Lt-
ie oioer JjTC, it Dent
r aud packed In m can
removable lid, tbe conwiU
lwBTA r. atv for nse. W.ll
make tbe bttt perfumed Hard pop
in aj m inures tuiinoui ooutnq. 11
the bene forclenDslng waaie plpea,
disinfecting Inki. cluaeta, wa4ii!uf
bottles, palate, treos, etc.
PENNA. SALTM'F'G CO.
Gen. Asenu. Pnlla. Pa.
A GREAT GOUGiJ El
Perhaps you may think that Scott's Emulsion is
only useful to fatten babies, to round up the angles and
make comely and attractive, lean and angular women,
and fill out the hollow cheeks and stop the wasting of
the consumptive, and enrich and vitalize the blood of
the scrofulous and anaemic persons. It will do all this
but it will do more. It will cure a
Hard, Stubborn Cough
when the ordinary cough syrups and specifics entirely
fail. The cough that lingers after the Grip and Pneu
monia will be softened and cured by tks balsamic heal
ing and strengthening influences of this beneficent
food-medicine, namely, Scott's Emulsion of Cod-liver
Oil and Hypophosphites of Lime and Soda.
Refuse substitutes. They are never as good.
Scott & Bowne, New York. All Drugzists. 50c. and 1.
Sandpaper is made of powdered glass.
Two thousand patents have been taken
out in this country on the .mano.fe.oW
nre o f paper alone.
Like a Machine,
Which kept in oruar runs smoothly and nr
laxly, bo uie bowuia keep up tuei action U
meui urea nre Ukea to keep them la good
wowintf oruer. 'A'al Intent, ot course, that
Uuiy are out ot order, 'ine surest recourse
then u to Jtiostetter's Stomach tinier, a laxa
tive mild but eneouve, wiuuu is auio a remedy
lor dyspepsia, malaria, raen malum, nenrous
nesa auu aiuney irouutu.
According to the latest reports, there
are in tbe world 140,334 miles of sub
marine telegraph cable. Of this total
the various governments own 14,480
miles of cable and 21,550 miles of wire.
The balance is owned by private companies.
and enriched, and thus sustains the nerves
and all the bodily functions.
" I take Hood's 8arsaparIUa every spring,
and It Is tbe only medicine I use through the
year. It enables me to do my house cleaning
and farm work all through the summer. It
helped me very much for palpitation of the
heart I think Hood's 8arsaparilU Is the
medicine for everyone and all who take it
will never be without It. I have also nsed
Hood's Pills and they are the best I ever
tried." Mns. F. II. Andrews, 8. Wood
stock, Ct. Get Hood's, because
Just as yours will be if
you continue using poor
Bu My MANT0N
- hs Couoan Below Is Sont- Also One
LADIES' TOKI WAIST. DUCHiae or IuE OOil.
NEW YORK, N. Y.
fc'l.nrf Tluhtnln. Pnvif rtinnnA. than Rhtnvla.
lid ten tine. Duller, tl. MKT a I. liuorinu a
Cohhi'Oatixo Co., TtU a Cuutrul bu, Euih I
CouKh Syrup. Tate
In time. Sold bv dmirel!
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