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C55S? "K 'Sj y &&-? -"t :ls "ti ( . - ' .S." ' WOMAN'S DEPARTMENT. ABOUT US. Some Fama From Eminent Aathors oa the Relation or Woman to BXaa sad the World In General. If the Bible bad said man was made out of woman's rib I would believe; for all things in this woild a man is most helpless alone. A chicken two Lours out of the shell can take better care of itself than a man can. So it is all right that a man by 20 or 25 should be looking around for a woman to take care of him; and a woman is never per mitted to look around for a man. The women do not need to go com ting;. I am sure there is some mistake in the transaction. It sliould read that man was made of a rib of a woman. I can not stick a pin down in liter ature, but I come upon the praise of woman; and it is not for me to say it is not all deserved. Let me give you a taste of my collection of nice things. Martin Luther said: "Earth has noth ing more tender than a woman's heart when it is the abode of pit-." Miche let said, "Woman is the Sunday of man; not his repose only, but his joy the salt of his life." 'That is a little mixed as a iigure, I allow, but Mr Miche let meant well, and when one is inlovo lie can not help getting a little flurried. At least it is so with women. John Adams said: "All that I am my moth er made mc." Lord Lansdowne sai.l: "If the whole world were put into one scale, and 1113- mother into the other, the world would kick the beam." I like that, because of all things I am sure the very best is a noble mother. The Arabs say: "One may get a hun dred wives, but he can never get but one mother; therefore a mother is equal to a hundred ' wives." But Leo pold Suhcfer has it better yet, when he says: "But one thing on earth is bet ter than the wife, that is the. mother." However, the wife gets enough praise, and need not be jealous. 2s. 1. Willis said, as sweet! as he said all things: "The sweetest thing in life is the un clouded welcome of a wife." Richter, that is, the divine Jean Paul, said: "No man can cither live piously, or die righteous, without a wife!" Emerson said: "A beautiful woniau is a practical poet, taming her savage mate, planting tenderness, hope and eloquence in all she approaches." I have, however, never heaul that Mrs. Emerson had much taming to do only she must see that her mate had his hat on when he went abroad. Among the very pretty things sa'd of "women, Whittier lias g ven us this: "If woman lost us Eden, such as she alone restores it!" Voltaire said: "It is woman who teaches us repose, civility and dignity." Raskin says a great main line things of woman. "Shak spcarc has no heroes; he has only hero ines." 'J his is always true in a ruder, earlier stage of society. Woman al ways begins civilization. The honor of woman has always been the corner stone in building society. A race lack ing respect for woman has never ad Tanced politically and socially, or has speedily decayed. Lessing said: "Na ture meant to make woman its master piece." Confucius, 2,200 years ago, s.aid: "Woman is the world's master piece." But Malherbe spoke the minds of all Frenchmen when ho said: 'There are only two beautiful things in the world women and roses; and only two sweet things women and melons." This was gallant, but natuial; and it gave woman her true place as a blossom and fruit of nature. Concerning women and men as equals Buskin says: "We are foolish, and without excuse, in claiming the superiority of our sex to the other. In truth each has what the other ii s not. One completes the other, and they are in nothing alike. The happiness of both depends on each asking and re ceiving Irom the other what the other only eanghe." Thackeray drew this contrast: "Almost all women will give a sympathizing hearing to men who arc in love. Be the ever o old, they grow young again in that conversa tion, and renew their own early time. Men are not quite so generous." Vol taire said: "All the reasonings of men are not worth one sentiment of wo men." Gladstone says: "Woman is the iuostpoi feet when the most wo manly." Dr. Clarke s ys: "Man is not superior to woman, nor woman to man. The relation of the sexes is one of equality; not of better ami worse, or of higher and lower. The loftiest ideal of humanity dexuands that each shall be perfect in its kind, and not be hindered in its best woik. The lily is not inferior to the rose, nor the oak supe rior to the clover; yet the glory of the lily is one, and the glory of the oak is another; and the use of the oak is not the use of the clover." "Woman," says another writer, "must "be rcgarde 1 as woman, not as a nonde script animal, with greater or less ca pacity for assimulatlon toman." Dr. Clarke says, again: "Educate a man for manhood, a woman for woman hood; both for human ty." Roger "Williams said: "Woman is Predesti nated, is Called, is Just fi -d, is Glori ed. and wears that Golden C .ain as well as the Wisest and Strongest of Mankind." The author of "OurHe Tcdity from God" says: "There is to day in human language no word of love and loveliness that was not born of the sexual division of primal unity; ior in prininl life-forms sex is perfect in each individual the ma'e is un known. Marriue it a mere sym bol of that innate predestinated sin gleness which is "involved in tha idea of mix. The lover seeks in his be loved himself, that he may ba com pleted. Reproduction is not the, first thought of a true marriage, but salt- completion," Theodore Parker said: "A nun i s an old maid organized. When woman has the s ime rights of mind, body and estate that man has, then you will not find five thousand and fifteen widows in Boston." I think that all people of common senso are getting over the idea of making men out of women. The aim hereafter will be to let women make women of themselves. Women will at her best be the queen; man is at his best the king. Each will worship the other. Man must so live that woman at hei highest shall honor him; and woman so live that man at his highest shall turn joyously to her. Miss Abigail Dodge says: "No monarch has been so great, no peasant so lowly, that he has not been glad to lay his best at the feet of a woman. " But I am sure that this picture may be reversed, for there s no worship so glad and so great as that which a woman bestows on a princely man. I am bound to say now, that in my collection there arc also some shafts ol a different character. Cowley said: "What is woman? Only one of na ture's agreeable blunders." Cervantes said, somewhat doubtfully: "All wo ni"ii are good good for something, or rood for nothing." Solomon said some very mean things about us, and then hid himself under the cloak of inspira tion. However, I despise him. But 13oiic:cault hit hardest when he said: "I wish Adam had died with all his ribs in. his body." I will not let John see these things which I have gathered, for he has inherited an idea that women arc vain. It is not true; but jt is not John who thinks i, but some crispy old ancestor. Yet I am proud to find such words in our best authors. Mary E. Spencer, in Si. Lou s Globe-Democrat. Women as Doctors. That ladies are successful in the practice of medicine i3 very evident if one will look around him. They till ofliccs of trust and responsibility in the hospitals of Great Britain and even of India. Dr. Garrett Anderson, of Eng land, makes 50,000. per year. In America there are hundreds of lady physicians, one hospital in New York having fourteen upon its staff. The Massachusetts Medical Society, which so long refused admission to women, sent Dr. Graco Wolcott to the lecent medical convention in Chicago. Dr. Fannie Dickenson, of Chicago, who is a well-known oculist, is the first woman to be admitted to the Interna tional Medical Congress. And still the rector of a Belgium University has delivered an inaugural address on the practice of medicine by women, and the burden of his elaborate paper is that 'there is an incompati bility between the feminine indivi lau ality and the practice of medicine." He does not say that this "incompati bility" is caused by any deficiency of brains or judgment, and for this we arc duly thankful, but he does say that it is because the work exceeds the amount of available strength." We are waiting now for proof that tho women of Belgium do no work which requires more exertion than setting a bone or writing a perscription. Exer cise developcs muscle, and women who wash and iron and work in the fields ought to have their muscles sufli cientlv developed to ride out and see a patient or even admin stcr a pill, if necessary. Saturday Evcniiig Herald. WHAT WOMEN ARE DOING. The young lady graduates of Oxford and Cambridge have formed a guild for aiding the London poor. A XATIVC newspaper for ladies ha been started in Mysore, India. T.i leading features will be serial stories, translations from Shakespeare, desc ip tious of travel, biographies of eminent women, articles on needlework, etc The women of the poorer classes make sacrifice?, and run risks, and bear privations, andexcroise patience and kindness to a degree that the world never knows of.- and would scarcely believe even if did know. Sa7nucl Smiles. Miss. Abbv MohtokDiaz. during her recent visit to Washington, organized an Educational and Industrial Union in that city. The president is Mrs. John A. Logan, and among the directors are Miss Anna Dawes, Mrs. Stanford and Mrs. Dr. Newman. The Chamois Sandal Company, ol Grand Rapids, Mich., is owned and controlled wholly by women. It started some two years ago with a capital of less than $2" 009. To-day it imports its chamois s'cins direct from Italy, and the silk used in making them into san dals for children's wear is purchased directly from the manufacturers. It employs hundreds" of women at good pay, and uses no machinery of any kind. Work begins at 8 a. m.t and ends at 4 p. m. The New Century Guild of Working women, in Philadelphia, has made ar rangements to send, out by the day or the half-day expeit persons to sweep, dust, do chamberwork. clean silver, wash windows and r.ll the many things necessary to keep a house in order. It is thought that a better class of help can be thus obtained from young wo men who do not object to the work, but to the living out There are a great many of the new flat buildings which have restaurants, and the fam ilies occupying these flats dispense for the most pare with cooks and have their meals furnished. Tne guild fur nishes them a waitress by the day and a girl to come in for two hours every morning to sweep and dust, and by this arrangement they not ouiy live far more cheaply, but dispense with the discomfort of naving to furnish sleep ing apartments for servants in the aar- row limits' of their flats. DECIDEDLY OBLIGING. A Idy KorJer Who Was Any lalas; Bat TreablMome aad Fialckr. "Oh, Til not be the least trouble," said the lady boarder, who had wheedled the mistress of a select boarding-house into taking her for six months, al though the mistress had said that she never, never would take another wom an to board. 1 don't blame yon for not wanting to board women," said the lady boards er, while laying off her wrap in her room, "most of them are so trouble some and finicky, but 1 think you'll find I'm not one of that sort I just take thing3 as I find them and make no fuss at all. Now I'll just wash my hands and oh, could you get me a little white castile soap instead of this cocoanut oil kind?" ril see," said tho landlady. And about the towels I never use crash quite so rough as this, and I'd like a Turkish towel on the rack all the time." "Very well." "Thank you. Tm determined not to be troublesome after I once get set tled, and I don't you think this dress ing case would look better on this side of the room?" "I don't know." "Seems to me it would. Suppose you call a servant up and let us sec how it will look moved; and while she's here 1 believe I'll change the bed to the other corner that is, if you've no objections." "Oh. none at all." "Thank you. I don't really care much, but then oh, would itbo too much trouble to have a cup,, of hot water sent up to my room an hour be fore each meal? I think it docs mo good." "1 suppose 1 can arrange that,' says the landlady, gloomily. "Thanks; you are very kind. Now, I guess I'll oh, I wonder if there is any hot water in the bath-room? I'd like to run in and just wash out a few little things that I never send to the laundry. And I wonder if I'd be much in the way if I rau down to the kitchen and ironed them when they're dry? I'll not be a bit of trouble." "The cook may object," says the landlady, blandly. "1 don't mind myself." "Oh, I'll get around her easy enough. Trust me for that. I always do out my handkerchiefs and small pieces wherever I board, and I oh, while I think of it. I'd like to mention that I never drink any thing but green tea, and; if it wouldn't be too much trouble, I'd like my bread made with out a bit of salt in it. Perhaps it's only a notion, but I can't eat salted bread." "I hardly know how to manage that," says the landlady, dubiously. "Oh, it's to be easy enough. When you bake just make one loaf without salt in it. See? i hope you won't take a bit of trouble on my account if I'm sometimes too late for my meals. Sometimes I may be out shopping or may feel a little lazy in the morning and won't get up, but l'll.soon find out where things are in the pantry and will just help myself without troubling any one." This strikes the landlady so dumb that she can say nothing, and the obliging boarder guiltlessly rattles on. "I like hot cakes for breakfast the year round, and, somehow, no kind of steak agrees with me but sirloin. Would you mind ringing for a servant and having her lower the window a little from the top? Oh, 1 see the blankets on the bed are white. It's only a foolish notion of mine, but I really prefer reil blankets; and I see yon have woven wire springs. Could you as well as not exchange them for the spiral springs? 1 much prefer them and I " but the landlady, be ing new in the business, has gone from the room in a dazed condition of mind while the lady boarder reduces hor wants to writing as they occur to her during the day. Detroit Free Press. Conkling and the Reporters. Roscoe Conkling had an exceedingly genial way in dealing with reporters who were known to him. He was al ways happy and pleasant in his man ners; frankly to'd them what , they wanted to know, but invariably wound up the interview by resting his white hand on the reporter's shoulder and saying: "You will please to remember, my friend, that I have not said any thing for publication." Then he would expla'n how publicity might hamper him in his legal cases. His confidence was always respee'e I. Since he estab lished himself in New York he was fre quently called out of bed long after midnight in response to a reporter's call. Even at that hour he was genial, witty and obliging, as far as he could be. A short time before his death a reporter told him that he would like al ve all things to print some of the i: eresting confidential chats he bad 1 a I with him. The rei orter dilated 'ithe avidity with whit h newspaper r v.ders would read such matter. The J mator only smiled and said: "Wait till after my death, my friend; wait till I am dead." M T. Sun. In the Pennsylvanian community of Economy every inhabitant is com pelled to rigidly conform to the rules. Every one is required to attend church twice every Sunday "and hear two ser mons from Father HenricL Any obb found out of bed after nine o'clock on. any night is immediately banished from the town, and all are required to rise at five oclock in tho morning. la addition to three meals daily, - free'1 luncheon is served to the whole com-, sanity at nine o'clock every morniaf aad at three every afternoon. PLOWS AND PLOWING. Waat a Wrmmr Caa AreomplUk wltk a Geo Itaplavieat. The mold-board of the plow is an inclined plane. Hence the resistance offered to plows by the earth is in the ratios of the quotients obtained by di viding the right of the mold-board by its length. The shorter the mold board and the more abrupt its curve the greater the draft. When the plow has a long, slender point, the work for the team is easier than when the point is worn off till it is short and thick; so a plow with a long line drawn diagonally from the point, low at the rear and gently curved, makes easier work for the team. Our object should be to get a plow having these poiuts in as marked degree as will ad mit of the plow doing good work. For if tho mold-board has not enough curve, it will not turn the ground well. Some want for plowing sod a curve so abrupt and high that the furrow will be turned, or rather thrown, with sufficient force to break tho sod into pieces. Some pieces are thrown cross ways of the furrows aud others are turned with the turf up. Now this is just what some want, becauso then the harrow will tear the sod into bits. Both plowing and harrowiug are very hard on the team, and this, I think, should be a sufficient objection to this kind of plowing. Another objection is that many bits of the sod are left with the turf up, ready to grow. For plowing sod I prefer a low, gently curved mold-board; this will turn the sod upside down, but no more, and will not break it into pieces. When tho field is plowed the surface i' smooth and no sod is visible, and the work for the team has been the mini mum. Then with the harrow I can cut and pulverize the ground without bringing turf to the surface. For other ground, however.I prefer a higher, more sliarply curved mold board; one that will turn the furrow with sufficient force to break it inte bits. However, the plow should not throw the furrow with snclr-force as to bring part of the ground that was on the surface before to the surface again, this puts a worse than needless increase on the work of the team, for it is bet ter to have the surface, exposed to the sun and atmosphere through the year buried, and fresh earth brought on top. Not a few plows have mold boards to high and sharply-curved for any use. The curve of the mold-board should be carefully considered in se lecting the plow. Much depends upon the way in which the team is hitched. A straight line drawn from the point where the tugs arc attached to the hames to the center of resistence should have the point of the beam in the same plane, otherwise the horses must use some power simply to lift or pull down the point of the plow. The result is in creased draft, greater wear on the plow, harder work for the plowman and poorer plowing. 'It is difficult for ns to locate the center of resistence scientifically, but we can determine whether or not the team is hitched properly in this way: Select a spot ol level ground. In this draw a furrow as deep as you desire to plow. Level and smooth the bottom of the furrow. Place your plow in the fur row and start tho team along it. II the point is raised from the furrow 01 pulled into it, the team is not propcrlv hitched. Another fault is having the plow take too little or too much land. This is easily remedied with a proper clevis. The part fastened to the beam should have a row of holes, to regulate the depth of the furrow. The horizontal clevis working in this should have a similar row of holes, by which to regu late the width of the furrow. Three holes bored through the end of the beam, to receive a guide pin, do nol admit of a sufficiently accurate regu lation. A majority of the blacksmiths are in competent or careless. Unless jou watch them, they will spoil the plow in sharpening it. A plow properly made will, when set on a level floor, touch the floor at all points of edge oi the share; that is, .every point of the cutting edge and of the lower edge ol the land side is in the same plane. Also the side of the land side is straight A careless or incompetent blacksmith will get the point out of place. It will curve up or down, or outward 01 inward, or both. Then the plow must dip. push or wabble. The draft is in creased and so is the wear. The best plowing is impossible, and the plow man has a hard time of it. A good plow, properly attached, will run in light soil and smooth ground without a hand being put to it. On Illinois prairie land I have gone for eighty rods through mellow stubble ground with out touching the plow. John M. Stahl, in Philadelphia Press. Roosts for Chickens. The best roo3ts for chickens are light trestles about eighteen inches high. These can be made of inch strips about four feet long, and as many as are necessary. It is not best to have roosts too high. The roosts should be made movable for convenience in cleaning. Above all things care should be taken with the nests. Fresh straw should be pnt in whenever the house is cleaned. It is not difficult or a long task to clean a chicken-house. The principal thing is to get in the way of doing it as other chores are done. There is no half way that U worth doing in the chicken business. Either a eonshlerable brood should be kept aatL propei care given them, and thas sake" them pay. or none at all shomld he kept V. Y. Wilnm. .. FLIGHT OF LOCUSTS. Tby Eat Up Kvwy UrtH Tata aa Leavj tk Earta a Desert. An army of locusts is a wonderful and an interesting sight to the travel er who' does not own a yard of soil and is a mere onlooker at their fright ful devastation. It is Attila and his innumerable horses rushing over the -vegetable world. To-day the wide plains are shining green with dense foliage; to-morrow nothing but brown twigs and bare branches, when the legions move off on their combined mission. As they arrive the dense, dark clouds moving up from the horizon, and often obscuring the sun's rays, proclaim the approach of the widely-dreaded scourge. The alarmed villagers congregate on the expected line of march, beating drums and brass pots, shouting and lighting bon fires and making all kinds of hideous noises. On one occasion, in South Africa. I drove off the enemy from a friend's garden by making four heaps of damp rubbish one at each corner in preparation, and then, lighting them, at the proper moment, we dis persed tho advance guard, our col umns of thick smoke being carried by the wind upon the main body, which altered its route. Horses and oxen, their heads and nostrils tormented by the clinging limbs of the swarms, were bolting away to the woods, kicking and plunging in their hasty flight A hissing, crackling sound arose on all sides; the whole air seemed to be occupied by tho falling and flying imps of mis chief. Tho "locust birds" (a kind of crane) hovered in small parties on their flanks, and subsisted on a very small percentage of the in sect hosts. In desert localities, the hungry pests actually pitched on bones, matting, sticks, etc., and failing in a meal, attacked and devoured each other. Ou another occasion I drovo for miles along a sandy tract tho wheels . of the vehicle crushing myriads of the newly-hatched insects, all crawling and creeping, with mi gratory instinct toward the cultivated tracts. In India, locust visits aro further between, but far more for midable, owing to the overwhelming masses. Sometimes a series of clubs, composed of their flights, cover sever al miles simultaneously. Fortunately there are several birds and beasts in quest of their bodies, and I have even seen them salted; dried, and sold in the markets. I have often inspected a dish of curried locust, but could not bring a sufficient amount of curiosity to bear on the tasting experiment, though a prawny odor went up with the steam. The fishes are great de vourers of these winged visitors, for they fall into lakes and rivers during changes of wind and weather. Be sides fires made of green rubbish at top, I found gunpowder explosions very useful in scaring them away from tho vicinity of my garden. When several successive hordes alighted on my grass land I loaded my gun with dust shot and, stooping low on the ground, dis charged the contents of both barre's into their midst Having done so sever.il times, 1 enjoyed the welcome sight of seeing them rising into tho air and going elsewhere. I have no doubt a small cannon on such oc casions heavily loaded with sharp sand would hasten their flight English Mechanic READY-MADE CLOAKS. The Extent of a Comparatively Vonn American Industry. "There is hardly a trade in the world that has grown so rapidly during the past few years as the cloak trade," said a manufacturer. "A few years ago it was a trade almost entirely un known on this side of tho Atlantic. In this country alone now there are hun dreds of houses devoted to its inter ests." "Can you give mo any figures as to its progress?" "According to returns made at tho last census, Ave find that the amount of business transacted in the matter of women's clothing footed up nearly $30,000,000. and it is likely that tho greater part of this was for outer gar ments. About two-thirds of this, or $19,000,000. is credited to New York; to Philadelphia, $2,500,000; Boston, $1,800,000; Chicago, $1,500,000; Cin cinnati and San Francisco about 1, 000,000 each. According to the same returns the amount of capital employed was about $7,500,000; now it must be about $10,000,000." What is the center for manufactur ing cloaks in Europe?" 'Berlin, probably, because of the cheap manner in which they can be put together there. A number of cloaks used to be imported here from Berlin, but the importation has largely fallen off and domestic goods arc now used. The foreign manufacturers can not make garments to fit our Ameri can ladies welL" "Where do the various styles come from?" "Paris stands at the head of the list 'of cities furnishing designs, although we are every year advancing in that line ourselves. Nearly all the cloak hou3ei have representatives abroad, who visit London, Paris Berlin and Vienna. They buy samples of what they think wonld be a popular style and send them over to be copied." N. T. Mail and Express. Overloading Himself; Customer (to art dealer) If that is a genuine Corot, Isaacstcia. I don't anderstaMd how you caa sell it so cheap. '" Art Dealer (in a confidential whis per) Jly treat Iras aew ia .dot pla nets, unci a DomgK aa oTcrsiecavf let make. X. I. Saa.. PERSONAL AND LITERARY. Matthcw'Arnold once said to an ac quaintance: "You should know my wife. She has all of mysweetness and none of my conceit" Bancroft the historian, always writes under a high moral sense of duty. He wants every sentence to embody a fact or a true and noble sentiment Macaulay once wrote of a French writer, Barene, who hated England, that "the one small service which he could render to England was to hate her." Miss Braddon, who married John Maxwell, her publisher, is said 'to make her influence felt as well in her kitchen as in- her drawing-room, being a housekeeper as well as a novelist The journalists of Los Angeles, Cal., have founded a colony of their own at Bamona, in the San Gabriel valley. Among them, it is said, Thomas Nast, the famous cartoonist will make his home. Lord Salisbury, Premier of En gland, who was formerly a working journalist is always as courteous as his position will allow to newspaper men, and frequently incloses news to men who were formerly his coiabor ers. The London Spectator says of General Grant's "Memoirs" that they are "the true image of a man in whom the purely personal pleasuro of suc cess in battle was reduced to nothing and who was generally sorry at having to take his enemy's sword." None of Mrs. Frances Hodgson Burnett's stories has been so success ful as her "Little Lord Fauntleroy." which has paid her thousands of dol lars in royalties. It still keeps up its popularity aud is now near its fiftieth thousand in America, while many thousand copies of it have been sold in England. An Italian edition of the story has just'been published in Rome, and a Berlin newspaper is publishing it serially. Rev. Robert Collyer. author of "Talks to Young Men," was twenty seven years old when he came to this country. He brought his bride over with him in the steerage. For nine years he worked as a blacksmith in Pennsylvania; then he became a local Methodist preacher, but later he be came a Unitarian, and went to Chi cago, where he soon made a reputa tion, and was finally called to the Church of the Messiah in New York. A letter by Chattcaubriand. dated October, 1825, and disposed of for sixty francs at a recent sale of auto graphs, contains the following pass age: "lam not at all Republican in my principles, although I see very clear ly that the incapacity of some and tho superiority of others, is leading us in the direction of the Republic, and although I am fully able to com prehend the kind of popular liberty which, unknown to the ancients, has been evolved necessarily among our selves by a more perfected state of so ciety. " 0 m HUMOROUS. Harlem has a base-ball club called "The Girls." It is doubtless referred to as the Feminine. Xorrisburg Herald. Soda fountains generally do a rushing business. The fountain nozzle is an orator in its way. The more wind and froth the more noise. X O. Picayune. She (sentimentally inclined) "What is your favorite flower, Mr. Pitt? He (commercially inclined) "Well, we handle various brand?, but there is tho biggest margin in red winter No. 2. Epoch. A youthful applicant for gradua tion on being asked the other day "What does history teach?" answered, "That the United States has never been whipped and never will bo." Lexington (Ky.) Press. Physician (to Mrs. Colonel Blood, of Kentucky) "How did your husband pass the night?" Mrs. Blood "He seemed quite comfortable, sir, and asked for water several times." Phy sician (with a grave look) "H'm still flighty." Life. Jaggs " No, sir; no two persons think alike, and" Baggs O, ye they do. I owe you two dollars." Jaggs " Don't let that bother you. I nuver thought you'd pay it, anyway, so" Boggs " There you are; my thought exactly." Philadelphia Call. Citizen (to leader of little German band) "Here, Dutchy, is a five-dollar bill if you will play for an hour." Dutchy (highly pleased) "Ah, you vos fond of dot music!" Citizen "No; but a 250-pound enemy of mine occu pies the second floor front and he is too big a man for me to tackle myself" K Y. Sun. A middle-aged but rich widow, who had a very disagreeable temper, being in face a perfect virago, com plained to her son-in-law that she was annoyed by the attentions of a certain man. "How shall 1 get rid of him?" she asked. "Marry him," laconically replied the son-in-law. "I'd see him hanged first" "Just marry him, and it won't be long before he'll hang himself." "Why so contemplative, papa mine?" said the beautiful Miss Wa bash to her father, the eminent St. Xonis pork-packer; "is yoar mind upon business cares intent?" "Yes, dear," he replied, pashiag her away gently; "aad you mos'ta't disturb me new. I bare perfected a' system by which I can make silverwUpigtail fc vors for the german? and I am trvinr to think W aosMthlBttiia0 will Z rent the grant fros raapieg eatirelj- to waste. : V "5.!- ." ." t Till - . -.- .VCT f k m m ?? -"- z rihl :& 2-x rriu& 'rXtm-wi A fc -- . ! , .'? rsgtv !-? :ifeSSSi &i K3? & -J iyy, WP&2& &&?&& $w ?: &?3 &&; iMH-CJ i5$2 SZri.f-K.J I .. & '.JS&hs: ten aii 1. ifcM?& jsS,' &?.- 3hcJ?ffi&&m :3WoS5&gSffi ''y' JSI.3J3 ,33nrr-- -,-.-- -- -1pi Wwlai p' arv. j .K..& -- V3CLSisl at- "iSJi5:ra"L?A. ?, yr "fc3itASgT35tfl