The Western advance. [volume], March 28, 1874, Image 1

About The Western advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1872-1874

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VOLUME II.
^ehtfed Qlvsctlluiw.
PASSED.
BY ROSE TBRRT COOKE.
NKVEBMORE, nevermore.
When the twilight pale and gray
Veils the golden brow of day,
Shall I, looking through the gate,
Wait, wait, long and late,
For thy coming—nevermore I
•Nevermore, nevermore,
When the breathless trance of Jnne
Glitters in the rl«ing moon.
Underneath a whimpering tree,
Shall I wait, wait for thee,
Liiger for thee—nevermore.
Nevermore, nevermore,
Where the blossomed branches spread
Dew and odor overhead,
fr-hall sit beside thee, dear,
All thy secret heart to hear.
Thy consoler—nevermore.
Nevermore, nevermore,
All that poignant past is fled
I am living, thou art dead.
I have drained the chalice awect.
Thy quick heart has ceased to beat:
Life shall vex thee nevermore.
Nevermore, nevermore:
Earth has sung the gong to thee
Heaven returns it unto me.
In thy blessing blessed 1 go.
Home enfolds thee thou shall know
Mortal anguish nevermore.
—Harper's Bazar.
THE UNDERTAKER.
[From the Russian of Alexander Serguevitctt
Poushkin
The last of the goods aud chattels of
the undertaker, Adrian Prohoroff, were
heaped into the hearse, and a pair of lean
horse* dragged it along for the fourth
time from the Basmanaja to the Nikits
kaja, for to the latter street the under
taker was removing with all his house
hold. Having closed his old shop he
nailed a notice to the door to the effect
that the premises were to be sold or let,
and started off on foot to his new abode.
He was surprised to find on approaching
the little yellow house, which had so long
taken his fancy aud which he had at last
bought for a considerable sum, that he did
not fuel in good spirits. Having crossed
the threshold and finding his new abode
in great confusion he sighed at the recol
lection of the old hovel, where during
eighteen years everything had been con
ducted with the strictest regularity, and
he scolded his daughters and the maid-of
all-werk for their dilatoriness, and set to
assisting them himself. Order was soon
established the sacred image-ca. e, the
dresser with the crockery, the table sofa,
and bed occupied the corners assigned to
them in the back room in the kitchen
and the fitting-room was placed the mas
ter's handiwork, which consisted of cof
fins of all sizes and colors, and the cup
boards were filled with mourning cloaks
and torches. Over the gate appeared a
signboard, representing a corpulent
Cupid holding a reversed torch, with the
inscription: "Here are sold and orna
mented plain and painted coffins coffins
also let out on hire, and old ones re
paired." The girls retired to their room,
and Adrian, having inspected his dwell
ing, sat down by the window and ordered
the samovar to be got ready.
The enlightened reader is aware that
both Shakespeare and Walter Scott repre
sented their grave-diggers as cheerful and
jocose persons, in order *o strike our im
agination "more forcibly by the contrast.
Out of regard to truth, however, we can
not follow their example, and are com
pelled to admit that the disposition of our
undertaker fully corresponded with his
mournful calling. Adrian Prohoroff was
habitually sullen and thoughtful. His
silence might occasionally be broken for
the sole purpose of scolding his daughters
when he had chanced to find them idle,
gazing out of the window at the passers
by, or asking an exorbitant price for his
goods of those who had the misfortune
(and sometimes also the good fortune) to re
quire them. Thus it happened that Adrian,
now sipping his seventh cup of tea, was
as usual sunk in melancholy reflections.
He thought of the pouring rain which
fell at the very outset of the retired Brig
adier's funeral the previous week. Many
mourning cloaks had shrunk in conse
quence, and many hats had been spoiled.
He foresaw unavoidable expenditure, for
his old stock of mourning attire had fallen
into a pitiful condition. He hoped to
charge a good round sum at the funeral
of the merchant Truhin's old wife, who
had now been nearly a year at death's
door. But the old woman lay dying at
Kasgoulai, and Prohoroff feared lest her
heirs, notwithstanding their promise,
would neglect to send for him all that dis
ance and would come to terms with the
nearest undertaker.
These meditations were unexpectedly
disturbed by three Freemason-like taps at
the door.
Who is there?" asked Proh off.
The door opened, and a man in whom
the German artisan was recognized at a
glance walked in, and cheerfully ap
proached the undertaker.
Pardon me, my dear neighbor," said
he, in that Russian dialect which we can
not listen to without a smile. Pardon
my intruding upon you—I was anxious
to make your acquaintance. I am a
bootmaker, my name is Gottlieb Schulz,
and I live across the street in the little
house facing your windows. To-morrow
I celebrate my silver wedding, and I came
to ask you and your daughters to dine
with us in a friendly way."
The invitation was accepted with good
will. Ihe undertaker asked the boot
maker to sit down and take a cup of tea,
and thanks to the cordial disposition of
Gottlieb Schulz their conversation soon
became friendly.
How does your trade prosper?" asked
Adrian.
Ah—he—he!" answered Schulz, so
so I cannot complain, although my
goods are, of course, different from yours
a live man can do without boots, but a
dead man cannot do without a coffin."
Very true," remarked Adrian how
ever, if the live man has not got where
with to pay for his boots one cannot take
it amiss in him if he goes barefooted, but
a dead beggar has a coffin gratis."
In this manner they conversed for some
time. At last the bootmaker rose, and,
taking leave of the undertaker, renewed
his invitation.
The next day at twelve o'clock precise
ly the undertaker and his daughters
passed through the wicket of the newly
bought house on their way to Neighbor
Schulz'. I shall not describe either the
Russian caftan of Adrian Prohoroff, or
the European attire of Akulina and Daria,
departing in this respect from the now
so prevalent custom among novelists. I
dp not, however, consider it superfluous
to remark that both young ladies wore
yellow bonnets and red shoes this they
did only on grand occasions.
The small dwelling of the bootmaker
was filled with guests, who chiefly con
sisted of German artisans, their wives,
and their workmen of Russian employes
there was but one, the Esthonian, Yoorko,
he watchman, who had, in spite of his
lowly calling, managed to secure the
special good-will of his host. He had
served in this capacity for five-and-twenty
years, faithfully and honestly, like the
postman of Fogarelsky. The flre of
1812, which destroyed the chief capital,'
annihilated also his yellow watch-box.
But as soon as the enemy was expelled a
new one appeared in its stead it was
gray, with small white Doric pillars, and
Yoorko was again seen pacing before it
Almost all the Germans who lived in the
vicinity of the Nikitsky gates knew him,
and some had even chanced to spend the
night of Sunday to Monday morning
under his roof. Adrian hastened to make
his acquaintance as he would that of a
man of whom he might stand in need,
sooner or later, and when the guests took
their seats at dinner, they sat next to
each other. Monsieur and Madame
Schulz and their daughter Lottchen, who
had seen but seventeen summers, while
dining with and entertaining their guests,
assisted the cook to wait upon them.
Beer flowed. Yoorko ate for four Adri
an did not cede to him his daughters,
however, stood on ceremony. The con
versation, kept up in the German lan
guage, was becoming louder and louder.
Suddenly the host begged for a few mo
ments' attention, and drawing the cork of
a sealed bottle exclaimed in aloud voice,
in Russian: "The health of my good
Louisa!" The so-called champagne
sparkled. The host tenderly kissed the
fresh face of his forty-year-old helpmate,
and the guests drank noisily to the
health of the good Louisa. The health
of my amiable guests!" exclaimed the
host, opening a second bottle. And his
guests thanked him, and again drained
their glasses. Here toast followed upon
toast the health of each guest was drank
separately they toasted Moscow and an
entire dozen of little German towns, all
corporations in general, and each one in
particular they drank to masters, and
they drank to foremen. Adrian drank
sedulously, and was so elated that he him
self proposed some jocular toast. Sud
denly one of the guests, a fat baker,
raised his glass, and exclaimed: 'To the
health of those we work for—unserer
Rundleute!" This proposal, like all the
others, was joyously and unanimously
applauded. The guests saluted each
other, the tailor bowed to the bootmaker,
and the bootmaker to the tailor, the
baker to both all to the baker and so on.
Yoorko, in the midst of these mutual
salutations, exclaimed, turning to his
neighbor:
44
What now! drink, sir, to the health of
thy dead ones."
All laughed, but the undertaker, con
sidering himself affronted, became sullen.
Nobody noticed him the party continued
its carouse, and the bells had already
rung for vespers when all rose from the
table.
The guests dispersed at a late hour, and
most of them were elevated. The fat
baker and the bookbinder, whose face
appeared as if bound in red morocco, led
Yoorko between them to his box, carry
ing out in this case the Russian proverb:
A debt is rendered honorable by payment.
The undertaker returned home tipsy and
wrathful.
ll
41
What, sir?" said the maid, who was
pulling off his boots '4 what dost thou
talk about? Make the sign of the cross!
To ask the dead to a house-warming!
What horror!"
By I shall ask them," continued
Ad-ian I shall ask them at once, for
to-morrow. Pray come, my benefactors,
come to feast with me to-morrow evening
I shall entertain you with what God has
given me." So saying the undertaker
tumbled into bed, and soon began to
snore.
It was still dark when Adrian was
roused. The merchant Truhin's wife had
died that very night, and a special mes.
senger had been sent on horseback with
this intelligence. The undertaker gave
him a tencopeck piece for a glass of
spirits, dressed in haste, took a droshky,
and drove to Rasgoulai. The police
were already stationed at the gates of the
house where lay the defunct trades
people were going in and out like
ravens at their prey. The corpse
lay on a table, yellow as wax
but not yet disfigured by decomposition.
Relations, neighbors and friends crowded
around. All the windows stood open,
candles were burning, priests were read
ing prayers. Adrian went up to Truhin's
nephew, a young merchant in a fashion
able coat, and assured him that the coffin,
candles, pall, and other funeral furniture
would be delivered with all punctuality
and without fail. The heir thanked him
absently, saying that he would not bargain
about the expense, but should trust implic
itly to his conscience. The undertaker as
usual swore that he would not overcharge
exchanged a significant glance with his
workmen, and started off to make the nec
essary arrangements. The whole day
was spent driving to and fro between
Rasgoulai and the Nikitsky gates to
ward evening, all being arranged, he set
tled with his driver and returned home
ward on foot. It was a moonlight night.
The undertaker had safely reached the
Nikitsky gates. At the Church of the
Ascension our friend Yoorko hailed him,
and on recognizing the undertaker wished
him good night. It was getting late. The
undertaker was approaching his house
when he suddenly fancied he saw some
one nearing it, open the wicket, pass
through, and disappear. What can this
mean?" thought Adrian, "Who is it
wants me again Can it be a thief? Do
lovers perhaps visit my silly girls? It
bodes evil!" And the undertaker was on
the point of calling his friend Yoorko to
come to his aid. Just then some other
person approached the wicket and was
about to enter, but, on becoming aware
that Adrian was nearing hurriedly, this
person stopped, and raised his cocked
hat Adrian fancied he knew the face, but
was not, in his haste, able to examine it
closely. You were coming to me," said
Adrian, breathlessly "do me the favor to
step in."
44
No ceremonies, friend," said the
stranger, in a hollow voice walk on—
show thy guests the way!"
There was no time to stand on cere
mony. The wicket stood open. Adrian
went up the staircase, the person follow
ing him. Adrian fancied that people
were walking about his rooms. "What
44
Why, indeed," reasoned he
aloud—" why is my craft worse than any
other Is an undertaker, then, brother to
an executioner? What had the heathens
to laugh at? Is an undertaker a Christ
mas harlequin I meant to have asked
them to a house-warming, to have given
them a feast but let them wait till they
get it. And I shall now invite instead
those for whom 1 work, my orthodox
dead."
§h W¥*rn
devilry is this!" thought he, and hurried
in—but here his legs gave way. The
room was full of dead people. The moon,
shining through the windows, lit up their
yellow and blue faces, sunken mouths,
dull, half-closed eyes, and thin, protruding
noses. Adrian recognized in them, with
dread, people who had been buried with
his aid and in the guest whom he had
preceded the Brigadier who had been in
terred during the pouring rain. All the
women and men assembled surrounded
the undertaker, bowing, and greeting
him all except one poor fellow, who had
quite recently been buried gratis, and
who, shy and ashamed of his tatters, did
not venture to come forward, but stood
retiredly in a corner. The rest were re
spectably dressed the women wore caps
with ribbons those men who had served
the State were in uniform, but their faces
were unshaven merchants wore their
holiday caftan*. Seest thou, Prohoroff,"
said the Brigadier, in the name of this
select company, how we have all risen
at thy invitation. Those alone have re
mained at home who could not possibly
come, who had quite crumbled to pieces,
or who had no skin, but only their bare
bones left but even thus, one of them
could not rest—so anxious was he to see
thee!"
AX that moment a small skeleton pushed
his way through the crowd and approached
•Adrian. His skull smiled affectionately
at the undertaker. Bits of light green
and red cloth and of old linen hung here
and there about him, as upon a pole,
while the bones of his feet rattled in his
Hessian boots like a pestle in a mortar.
44
Thou dost not recognize me, Prohoroff,"
said the skeleton. Dost thou remember
the retired Sergeant of the Guards, Piotr
Petrovitch Kurilkin, the same for whom
thou soldest thy first coffin, in the year
1799—and one of pine, too, for one of
oak!" So saying the corpse extended his
bony arms toward him but Adrian, mus
tering all his strength, cried out, and
pushed him from him. Piotr Petrovitch
tottered, fell, and went to pieces.
A murmur of indignation was heard
among the dead they stood up for the
honor of their fellow, threatening and up
braidingAdrian and the poor host deafened
by their cries, and almost pressed to death,
losing his presence of mind, fell across
the bones of the retired Sergeant of the
Guards and remained unconscious.
The sunlight had long been streaming
across the bed on which the undertaker
was sleeping. At last he opened his eyes,
and saw before him the maid, blowing at
the charcoal of the samovar. Adrian re
membered with dread all the events
of the preceding day: Trunin, the
Brigadier, and the Sergeant ap.
peared dimly before him. He was si
lently expecting the girl to begin the
conversation, and to relate to him the re
sults of the night's adventures
44
How thou hast overslept thyself,
Adrian Prohoroff, sir," said Aksinia,
handing him his dressing-gown. "Thy
neighbors, the tailor and the watchman,
came to thee with the announcement that
it was the saint's day of the Commissary
of Police, but thou wast pleated to sleep,
and we did not like to awake thee."
And did they come to me from the
late Madame Trunin?"
44
Late Is she then dead
44Fool
44
that thou art! didst not thou
thyself help me to arrange things for her
funeral?"
44
Hast thou lost thy senses, sir or have
the fumes of last night's drink not passed
off yet? What funeral was there yester
day? Thou didst feast at the German's
all day, and coming home tipsy didst
throw thyself on thy bed, and didst sleep
until this very hour, when the bells have
already rung for mass."
"Indeed!" said the rejoiced under
taker.
Of course," answered Aksinia.
44
Well, if that is the case, let us have
the samovar quickly, and call my daugh
ters."—St. Paul's.
Performing Fleas.
THE latest excitement in Berlin is an
exhibition of drilled fleas. The exhibi
tion takes place on a large sheet of white
paper fastened on an ordinary table, to
which all the spectators approach in turn,
so as to be able to witness in all details
the extraordinary maneuvers of these lit
tle, but marvelously powerful and gifted,
rascals. Here you see one of the mus
cular fleas rolling a small barrel along
with its feet, as the men do in the ciicus
there you see a female of the species
walking along in crinoline and carrying
her parasol with all the affectation of a
city miss at another place a Well-trained
fellow performs on the flying trapeze—
without any danger to his neck, however,
since the biggest fall would not break
that while below the trapeze, on the
paper, a host of little ones are turning
somersaults at a fearful rate. The largest
specimens of the collection have been
trained to draw wagons, drays, carriages,
etc. To fix the harness properly on them
the flea-tamer places his pupils on a piece
of paper covered with mucilage, where
they have to stick. He then, by the aid
of a watchmaker's loop, arranges a strong
gold thread around their bodies and at
taches it to the wagon or carriage. The
ladies of Berlin attend the exhibition in
large numbers and seem totake an extraor
dinary delight in the performance of the
little creatures, who are regularly fed
every morning from the arm of the great
flea-tamer, he being quite ready to shed
the last drop of blood for his darling little
pets. There has been no similar exhibi
tion in Europe since the days of the great
Italian flea-tamer Bartolotti, of whom a
number of more or less bloody stories are
still current, among others the following:
It was on a hot day in July that he pre
sented himself at the court of a French
Count, who called in his decollette-dressed
Countess to witness the performance along
with him. The little black fellows did
very well until, when they were about to
execute a military maneuver, the gentle
men of the troupe got tired of the per
formance, and, with a bold resolution,
took a leap straight into the bosom of the
Countess. Of course there was a grand
scene. The Countess shrieked with
horror the Count was laughing fit to kill
himself, and Bartolotti was ready to die
from anxiety for the life of his chief per
former. At last the Countess hurried off
into another room, calling loudly for her
chambermaid. To Bartolotti the few
minutes that intervened seemed hours of
agony, and when the chambermaid reap
peared, with the criminal between her
fingers, his heart beat triumphantly. He
stretched out his hand, called his darling
pet by name, but no sooner had he seen it
than, with an intense look of disgust, he
threw it aside, exclaiming, Why, this is
none of mine!"
—Lewiston, Me., has 7,604 of its inhab
itants engaged in the different factories.
A N I N E E N E N N E W S A E
WORTHINGTON, NOBLES CO., MINN., SATURDAY, MARCH 28, 1874.
The Mountains of the United States.
The following is the height of the prin
cipal mountains in the United States, as
compiled from Prof. Hayden's Report, in
the United States Register:
ROCKY MOUNTAINS, SIERRA NEVADA AND CASCADE
RANGE.
Feet.
Mount St Elias, Alaska (Est.) 15 860
Mount Fairweather, Alaska (Est..) 14J783
Mount Whitney, California 15,00*1
Monnt Shasta, California 14,442
Mount Rainer, Washington Territory 14,434
Mount Tyndall, California 14,386
Mount Harvard, Colorado Territory 14,270
Pike's Peak, Colorado Territory 14,216
Irwin's Peak, Colorado Territory 14,192
Gray's Peak, Colorado Territory 14,145
Monnt Lincoln, Colorado Territory 14,124
Mount Yale, Colorado Territory 14,081
Long's Peak, Colorado Territory 14,050
Mount Brewer, California 13,886
Mount Hayden, Wyoming Territory 13,858
Horse Shoe Mountain, Colorado Territory.. .13,806
Silver Heel's Mountain. Colorado Territory.. 13650
Fremont's Peak, Wyoming Territory 18,*TO
Mount of the Holy Cross, Colorado Territory.13,500
Mount Hodges, Uintah Mountains 13,500
Mount Tohkwano, Uintah Mountains 13,500
Velie's Peak, Colorado Territory I3,4t6
Mount Audubon, Colorado Territory 13,402
Gilbert's Peak, Uintah Mountains 13,250
Mount Dana, California 13,227
Mount Lyell, California 13,217
Mount Guynt, Colorado Territory 13,223
Parry's Peak, Colorado Territory 13,133
Three Teton's, Idaho Territory 13,000
Bald Mountain, Idaho 13,000
Mount Flora, Colorado Territory 12,878
San Francisco Mountains, Arizona Territory. 12,052
Wahsatch Mountains, Utah 12,000
Spanish Peaks, Colorado Territory 12,000
Mount Englemann, Colorado Territory 12,000
Snow Line, 41° North Latitude.
Mount Wright, Colorado Territory 11,800
Mount Silliman, California 11.623
Mount San Bernardino, California 11,600
Mount Hood, Oregon 11,245
Mount Pitt. Oregon 11,000
Lone Peak, Utah Territory li.OOO
Black Hills, Wyoming Territory 11,000
Wind River Mountains, Wyoming Territory. 11,000
Electric Peak, Yellowstone Park 10.992
Mount Baker, Oregon 10,719
Emigrant Peak, Montana Territory 10,629
Lassen's Butte, California 10,577
Mount Sheridan, Wyoming Territory 10,420
Mount Washburn, Yellowstone Park 10.388
Ward's Peak, Montana Territory 10,371
Mount Delano. Montana Territory 10.200
Mount Blackmore, Montana Territory 10,134
Mount Doane, Yellowstone Park 10,118
Mount San Antonio, California 9,931
Mount St. Helen's (Volcano), Washington
Territory 9,760
Old Baldy, Montana Territory 9,711
Mount Garfield, Idaho Territory 9.704
Mount Adams, Washington Territory 9,570
Bridger's Peak, Montana Territory 9,0ft0
Crater Lake, Cascade Range, Oregon 9,000
Mount Olympus (Coast Range), Washington
Territory 8,13H
Yellowstone Lake, Wyoming Territory 7,788
Mount Mitchell, Allegheny Mountains, North
Carolina 6,732
Mount Washington, White Mountains, Ne
Hampshire 6,285
PASSES OVER THE ROCKY MOUNTAINS.
Feet.
33d Parallel, near El Paso 5,714
35th Parallel, near Albuquerque 7.472
3rfth Parallel (Coochecopa Pass) 10,000
41st Parallel (Union Pacific Railroad) 8,241
42d Parallel (South Pass) 7,085
47th and 48th Parallels (Cadolt's Pass) 6,0*4
47th and 48th Parallels (Deer Lodge Pass) .. 6.200
47and48th Parallels (Lewis Clark's) 6,323
Flathead Pass (Northern Montana) 5,459
KutaniePas* (British America) 6,000
PASSES OVER THE SIERRA NEVADA8.
Tejon Pa«s, 31
a
45' North Latitude 5,250
Walker's Pass, 35
a
30' North Latitude 5,300
New Pass, to Owen's River 3,1«4
Mono Pass, to Mono Lake 10,700
Silver Mountain Pass, to Carson City
Donner Pass (Central Pacific Railroad) 7,042
Beckwith's Pass, to Pyramid Lake 4,,500
Truckee Pas 7,200
Lassen's Pa^s (40* 35' North Latitude)
Madelin Pass 6,667
Some (Jueer Superstitions.
IT is not necessary to go back to the
middle ages to find among the people the
grossest superstitions. It is not yet 200
years, no longer ago, indeed, than the be
ginning of the eighteenth century, when
men still believed in a thousand absurd
things in which the devil, and Heaven
only knows what occult influences, played
an important part.
A considerable number of these super
stitious beliefs have been collected in a
little French book which we have before
us. It is entitled La Magie Naturelle,"
and was published in the year 1715. It
being a copy of a revised and corrected"
edition, we are justified in coming to the
conclusion that the book had at least a
very fair sale. And then the publisher
neglected nothing, it would seem, to se
cure purchasers. On the cover there is
this announcement: To be had of Rob
ert le Turcq, rue d'Enfer, Amsterdam,"
which is very like Robert the Devil, street
of the Infernals. This was sufficient to
attract the attentic of the credulous.
One entire chapter of the book is de
voted to the vertus (powers, properties) of
certain animals. It is a series of recipes,
directing how one may acquire a super
natural power by utilizing different in
habitants of the animal kingdom.
Would you become brave, so brave even
as to have no fear of death itself! would
you be able to go everywhere without
danger, take part in the bloodiest en
counters and remain unscathed! then take
the feet of a hare and the head of a black
bird, tie them together, and carry them
attached to your arm.
If this process does not please you,
choose another. This one, for example:
Cut the skin of a lion in thongs and tie
them round you. But one has not always
a lion at one's disposal. For such cases
the author has provided. The lark, the
rapa of the Chaldeans, affords a substi
tute for the skin of the king of beasts.
He who will carry on his person the feet
of this bird will never be persecuted on
the contrary, he will always be ready to
face danger. He will always be victori
ous, and his enemies will fear him. The
right eye of this bird, enveloped in a piece
of wolfs skin, will make him who carries
it mild and amiable and by putting a
drop of lark's blood into a glass of wine
one may make himself loved by the per
son who drinks it. This last experiment
has been recently tried."
Who would ever have believed that the
lark possessed such along list of virtues
Amiability, courage, invulnerability, etc.,
etc.
In 1710 it was discovered," says our
author, that it one takes of the blood of
the seal and a bit of its heart and carries
them under his arm, he will surpass all
his fellows in wit and judgment, and the
criminal who is thus provided will ex
cite the sympathy and compassion of his
judges."
But these are only bagatelles. Here is
something worth while, thanks to the eel,
by means of which the dead may be re
suscitated. The only trouble is that the
preparation is somewhat difficult. It is
necessary, in the first place, that the eel
should die for want of water, and further
more that its body should be perfect and
entire. Then we are directed to put the
eel in a mixture of strong vinegar and the
blood of the vulture and cover it over
with manure—how large the pile should
be is not stated. All that now is neces
sary is to place the dead body before the
file in order to see the person return to
ife.
Another property of the eel: If one
eats its heart warm he will be able to fore
tell future events."
But let us leave the slippery eel for
that ominous bird of yore," the raven.
This memberjof the feathered tribe is well
calculated to excite the popular imagina
tion.
If we boil its eggs," says our French
man, and then return them to the nest
whence we have taken them, the raven
will Immediately fly away. Without
halting, he will cross lands and seas until
he arrives at the island on which Alodri
cus was buried and there, even, he will
remain only long enough to pick up a
little magic stone. He now returns, at a
single flight, with his precious burden to
his deserted nest. And now, O wonder!
hardly does he touch the eggs with the
stone when every trace of the boiling dis
appears. The bird having no further use
for the stone, being now sure that the
eggs will hatch, lets it fall. At this mo
ment we must be at hand to pick up the
stone. As soon as it is in our possession,
we must have it set in a ring. This ring
is priceless If we touch anyone with it
who is in fetters, or a door that is locked,
the fetters will immediately fall off and
the door fly open."
Besides these very useful properties
the ravenstone possesses others that may
be made to contribute greatly to our
amusement: For example, our author
says that he who puts it in his mouth
will be able to imitate the song of any
bird he chooses."
And the blackbird! Although its pow
ers are not equal to the raven's, they are
still very remarkable. Witness: "If we
hang up the feathers of its right wing
with a red thread, in a house that has not
been occupied, no one will be able to
sleep in it so long as the feathers remain
hanging. If we put its heart under the
head of a person asleep, the person will
tell all he has ever done in answer to our
questions while if we throw its heart in
to well-water, together with the blood of
a lapwing, stir, and then moisten the tem
ples ot any one therewith, sickness and
perhaps the death of the person will be
the consequence."
These are veritable facts," says the
author of La Magie Naturelle," as I
myself have frequently proved by experi
ment."
Did he ever verify this one also?
If any one eats of the brain of the
eagle, powdered, mixed with the juice of
hemlock, he will not stop till he pulls out
not only every hair on his head but every
hair on his body."
After having recorded all these extrav
agant superstitions the author of the little
volume informs those who have any inter
est in being informed on the subject that
when one would have recourse to these
secrets the trials shotild be made under
favorable planets—Jupiter or Venus,
when the object to do good when to do
evil, under Saturn or Mars.—Hearth and
Home.
The Queen of Diamonds."
MRS. ASTOR, the wife of the hundred
millionaire of New York, appeared at a
party which she gave at her Fifth avenue
residence, the other evening, in a style
which would justify any reporter in say
ing that she literally blazed all over with
diamonds." On each of her shoulders
she had four stars the size of silver half
dollars, made of diamonds. Her hair was
set very thickly with diamonds, and her
head seemed aflame with them. There
was a diamond bandeau upon her brow.
She had diamond car-rings, and a
diamond necklace of magnificent propor
tions. Upon the two sides of her chest
were two circles of diamonds, about the
size of the palm of the hand. From them
depended lines and curves of diamonds
reaching to the waist, round which she
wore a diamond girdle. On the skirts
of her dress in front were two large
peacocks wrought in lines of diamonds.
There were rosettes of diamonds on
her slippers. There were diamonds large
or small, but in every variety of form,
all over her dress and person, wherever
they could be artistically placed. She
presented an extraordinary and dazzling
spectacle as she moved languidly through
the dance among her friends. One of
the ladies present, a connoisseur in
precious stones, who kept cool enough
to take practical observation, says the
diamonds she wore could not have cost
less than a million dollars, and must
have represented her husband's income
for at least a quarter of a year. The same
lady, who is familiar with court life in
Europe, says that the largest collection
of diamonds in possession of any Eu
ropean Empress or Queen belongs to the
present German Empress but she adds
that even Augusta herself could not make
a diamond show which would begin to
compare with that made by Mrs. Astor.—
N. Y. Paper.
A Dumb Dialogue.
It wrenches one badly to step on the
wrong stair, but few can help laughing at
the awkward stride he makes. It is
equally funny to see a man meet the
wrong customer," and go to talking and
gesticulating at him as if he were some
body else.
Jones went out to the deaf and dumb
asylum the other day to inspect the insti
tution. Upon entering he encountered a
man, evidently an inmate, and he at
once endeavored to explain to the man by
making signs upon his fingers that he
wanted to look through the place.
The man also made signs which Jones
could not comprehend. Then Jones made
other and more elaborate motions, which
set the man at work with greater violence,
and for the next ten minutes they stood in
the hall gesticulating and twisting thci
fingers without either being able to com
prehend what the other meant. Finally
Jones became angry, and in an outburst of
wrath exclaimed:
Oh, get out, you idiot! I'm tired of
bothering with you!"
Thereupon the man said: That's just
what I was going to say about you."
"Oh, you can speak, can you? Then
why didn't you do so, and not keep me
standing here motioning to you? I
thought you were deaf and dumb."
"And I thought you were," said the
man.
I came here to inspect the asylum,"
said Jones, and I took you for a pa
tient."
"That's what I came here for, and I
thought you were an attendant," said the
man.
Here Jones and the man shook hands
and hunted up a genuine attendant, and
went away happy. After this Jones will
always use his tongue, no matter where
he is.—Youth's Companion.
A TENNESSEE father has got himself be
hind the bars for thrashing one of his sons
almost to death because the young man
would not go to a protracted meeting.
—A hen in Indianapolis has been so
affected by the Siamese Twins excitement
as to lay a hyphenated pair of eggs.
CURRENT ITEMS.
A MILWAUKEE horse has died of a
broken heart.
THE Patti is the name of one of the
new bonnets.
THE crack of base ball clubs will soon
be heard in the land.
MOMENTS of triumph are not always
moments of happiness.
THE Order of Enoch" is anew society
established by Brigham Young.
BOSTON'S new Postoffice is called a
magnificent heap of ugliness."
MEMORY is the only paradise from
which nothing can ever drive us.
A-MARYLAND miller %as owned and
tended one mill for forty-eight years.
No Northern man who goes to Florida
can rest until he has shot an alligator.
AN old sinner grumbles at .the gout as
a precious legacy"—only it isn't aisy.
THE Siamese twins, it appears, are not
to be allowed to rest either in peace or in
pieces.
IT is very ruinous to move, but
especially expensive to move in the best
circles.
SEE what It is to live in a warm country
the little boys in Texas are going to the
circus now.
CALIFORNIA still sneers at greenbacks,
and if a man hasn't gold and silver he is
rated "B 2."
THE first and only Grange in Arizona
was a few days ago organized at Phce nix
in the Salt River Valley.
A N EW YORK Shaker shook $4,000 out
of the colony the other day and then
shook himself far, far away.
A MAN has discovered how to live well
on twenty cents per day, but this won't
help the fifteen-cent people.
GLASS will sustain 2,000 pounds to the
square inch, it is said. Just threw a two
pound stone at a plate-glass window and
see.
JONES says that the difference between
his wife and the Pope is that she possesses
temper-all-power and His Eminence
doesn't.
A COMPANY has been formed on Bear
River, Cal., for the purpose of manu
facturing butter from the fat of the seal
and sea lion.
A WEDDING took place at Cairo a few
days ago in which the ceremony was per
formed by telegraph, the clergyman being
in Memphis.
A NEW HAVEN paper has finally admit
ted that there may possibly be one well
learned man and one well-bred lady out
side of New Haven.
FOURTEEN fathers in Quincy, 111., have
signed a pledge not to allow their daugh
ters to take music lessons until they know
how to make good bread.
MORE than a hundred people are drink
ing warm blood at the Brighton (Mass.)
abattoir, for various diseases, and there is
talk of building a hotel to accommodat
the patients.
A CLERGYMAN writes to the Baltimore
American that its attempts at criticising
Mrs. Van Cott are as ridiculous as the ef
forts of a mouse to nibble oft the wings of
an archangel.
THE Palatka (Fla.) Herald says that
Florida has been talked of South more
romantically, and examined less accu
rately, than any other section of country
on the continent.
A MONTREAL paper, speaking of a re
cent dualin explosion, says, in a most pa
thetic style, that the bodies of the victims
were spread over many rods, here apiece
and there a piece."
"MUNICIPAL INSANITY" is what they
call it in Chicago. In New York and
Brooklyn it is called municipal rascal
ity." To doctors of law it is known as a
complication of ring-round."
OVERSKIRTS are made very long and
come from the waist to the edge of the
skirt in front and puffed into the side
seams so as to be looped very high on the
hips. This is the latest style.
A MAN named Gail petitioned the Mis
sissippi Legislature for leave to hang
himself, but they refused to report favor
ably on the document and he still lives,
desiring, he says, to abide by the laws of
his country.
THE Maine Solons have curious notions
about the care of the poor. The Legisla
ture is seriously considering a bill to
make railroads support persons whom
they have brought to towns, if they be
come paupers.
THE Terry Island Second Adventists
stick to it that the end is coming pretty
soon, in spite of the recent miscalcula
tion, and Rev. C. C. Barker devotes four
columns ,of the Watchman's Cry to an
argument on the point.
IN reference to a distinguished surgeon's
opinion that Chang and Eng might have
been safely separated in life, the New
York Commercial Advertiser thinks that
Of all sad words to a Siamese twin
The eaddeet are these: Itmight have been.
A CAT in the Louisville Courier-Journal
office lived in a drawer for nine days
without food, light or drink, and in three
minutes after being let out she was play
ing base ball with a paste cup. This, it
must be remembered, was a Kentucky
cat.
A YOUNG lady graduate of the medical
department of Iowa University has won
the first prize for the best performed dis
section in surgical anatomy, from a class
consisting of twenty-four young men and
one other young woman.
A CONFIDENCE woman of rare beauty
and adroitness has swindled almost every
merchant in Virginia City, and gone off
with $3,000 of net result. The victims,
however, admire her cleverness so much
that they refuse to attempt her capture
and punishment.
THE filial tenderness of Mary Kane, of
New Haven, is truly touching. She de
sired to elope with a party already orna
mented with a wife, but would not budge
until she had seen her old and teeble
mother provided for. And so she had
her placed in the alms-house.
VARNISH FOR GRATES.—TO one pound
common asphaltum, fused in an iron pot,
add half a pint hot boiled linseed oil
mix well, and boil an hour. When par
tially cooled add one quart oil of turpen
tine. If too thick, add more turpentine.
Apply with an ordinary paint brush.
TEXARCANA, Tex., a town built in a dense
forest, is located nineteen miles from
Fulton, Ark., and is less than ninety days
old. It now numbers over 2,000 bona fide
citizens, and there are 200 buildings going
up There is a general ticket office, two
railroads, two express companies, two tel
egraph lines and forty saloons.
ONE of the ornaments picked out for
the coming bonnet is the Russian pompon.
It is of several colors nicely blended, and
stands upright from the side of the head,
gear like an illuminated cornstalk. Of
NUMBER 29.
course it will be fashionable. Anything
imported and with as high-sounding a
name as Russian pompon" cannot fail
to be.
RECENTLY a lady walked into the rooms
of the Home Missionary Society in the
Congregational House, Boston, and laid a
$500 bill upon the table of the Secretary,
Dr. Barrows, with a note containing these
words: Please appropriate the inclosed
to the cause of borne missions, and ac
knowledge it in the next Home Mission
ary as cash from H. Y." Having thus
done her errand, the lady walked out as
quietly as she came in.
THE New York varnishers and pol
ishers are reorganizing their trades-union
with a view of being enabled to regain,
with the opening of the spring business,
their former rate of wages, which, owing
to the financial convulsion of last fall,
were reduced by an average 20 per cent.
Their present average rate of wages is
fifteen dollars per week, and they expect
to have it raised when the time comes to
eighteen dollars per week, at an average
estimate.
SHORTLY after the American steamer
Illinois left Liverpool on a recent trip a
man was discovered who had concealed
himself for the purpose of stealing his
passage. When questioned he handed
the officer a card bearing the name of
a correspondent of a New York
daily paper. He stated that he had
money, but refused to pay for his passage.
He was therefore confined in a state-room
during his passage, and kept on prison
diet.
A TOUCHING story is related of a young
man from the vicinity of Ebensburg, who
was violently attacked some eight years
ago with the Western fever. He followed
the track of the setting sun, and upon ar
riving at his destination he possessed but
a dollar in the world. After eight years
of incessant toil he last week returned to
his native hills, having accumulated the
munificent sum of one hundred and
thirty-eight cents over and above the
amount necessary to pay his fare back.—
JohnsUmn (Pa.) Tribune.
The Hinge of the Universe.
The beautiful constellation of the Plei
ades is one of the most familiar in the
sky, but it is probably not generally
known bow important a position is held
by one of its stars in the economy of the
universe.
We read in the Book of Job of the
"sweet influences of the Pleiades," or
more literally of the seven stars," but it
has been a puzzle to biblical scholars
what is meant by this expression. Of
this cluster of stars, which Tennyson
compares to a swarm of fireflies tangled
in a silver braid,"' only six are now visi
ble to the naked eye, but as many as two
hundred have been seen through a power
ful telescope.
In GreeK mythology the group con
sisted originally of seven sisters, one of
whom married a mortal, and therefore her
star lost its brilliance and was no longer
visible. As the missing one was lost from
view long before the telescope was dis
covered, it is impossible now to tell
whether its light was simply bedimmed
or, as in some other cases, altogether ex
tinguished.
The lost Pleiad has been the subject of
much interest to the poets and painters,
but in the estimation of astronomers the
star called Alcyone holds the first rank.
According to the German astronomer
Maedler, it is the sun around which all
the starry systems are revolving. After
seven years spent in the most patient re
search he came to the conclusion that
Alcyone is the center or hinge of the uni
verse.
It may not seem to us large and bright
enough to occupy so important a position,
but it must be remembered that it is very
distant, and that its light is 537 years in
reaching our earth. Moreover, according
to Maedler's calculations, eighteen mill
ions of years are occupied in one gigantic
revolution of the universe around this re
mote center.
The discoveries resulting from the in
vention of the spectroscope have proved
that there is very rapid motion among
what are known as the fixed" stars.
Some are approaching us, others drifting
away, at the rate of from thirty to fifty
miles a second. It was Ion? ago an
nounced by Herschel that our sun, with its
attendant planets, was moving toward a
particular part of the heavens. It is re
garded as probable by astronomers that
the starry movements, like those of the
great men in Spain, are all revolutionary
in their character, but some have fixed
upon a star in theconstellation Hercules,
instead pfJpcjvfi&SsB the central point,
or hub, rafnd which turns the wheel of
the universe. ^_
Whichever point may be fiiiWf'decided
upon, we cannot but wonder at the power
and reach of the mind of man, which is
able to penetrate into such immense dis
tances of space, to measure the speed of
such rapid movements, to calculate the
almost inconceivable periods of time oc
cupied by the revolutions of the heavenly
bodies, and finally to point confidently
to the starry magnet which unites the
astral brotherhood in one great family."—
YoutA'* Companion.
A Good Canvasser.
A CENTRAL MICHIGAN editor, whose
death the Free Press chronicled only a
few months ago, was probably as persist*
ent a man as ever started out on a dun"
or looked for new subscribers. He was
ouce out on a jaunt in the township of
White Oak, Ingham County, sticking to
every farmer until he got his name and
money, and it so happened that he came
to a house where death had called a few
hours before. The farmer's wife was
laid out and the husbandman and his
children were grieving over her loss when
the editor knocked at the door.
What's up!" inquired the editor as he
saw the farmer's solemn countenance be
fore him.
My wife is dead," replied the farmer.
Is that so?" mused the editor, a little
disappointed. Did she die easy?"
Dropped off like a lamb,"
Did she say anything
Not a word—just went right to sleep
like."
I didn't know," continued the editor,
a sad look on his face," but what she
might have requested you to subscribe
for the Cascade, which you know is the
best paper in the country. If you want
it I'll take your name right in, and under
the circumstances I won't charge a cent
for the obituary notice!"
The farmer hung off for a while, but
before the editor weat away he had two
additional dollars in his pocket and had
written out an obituary notice for publi
cation in the next issue which the be
reaved husband pronounced a niighty
smart piece."—Detroit Free Press.