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: r- w m.x i FCBUSH-D BT " ( TERM: BARNS & FOSIIA. "independent- $100 'PER ANNUM WA9HlaTO BTRKIT. ) ' ( ' ADVA sc.. VOLUME I. OPt-AJSTD KL-VElSr, MICH., WEDNESDAY, M-AJFIOH: 30, 1859. XTTJISBEH, 14. iaeo. imo. i ri MncA ttur wtrtDir at Ciraad Haven, Ottawa Co., Hirhigaa. Offi o, a ATUiojlon S Ireet, JSffJm Utrtt eWe, jifHil tk Pvt. Ojf!(.H Bates of Advertising. 6iu fin lliu 19 Twelve) line or lee (Minion male 1 pjr. Bailnea Cm Ii, tot exceeding ix hue. 13,00 AdTertietueutJ unaccompanied with written or Terbal direction, will be puhlih.d until or Wed oat, and ebar;red for. When a postpone ment U added to an adrtienietit, the whole will be charged, the nio a fur the firt insertion. Letter relating to buine. to receive atten tion, luut be ad treated to the Putlibe . business DinncTonv. S. R. San ford, Sheriff of Ottawa Co., Mutkrrnn, Mich. James P. Scott, Clerk an 1 Register of Ottawa County, and Notary Public. Oflice t the Court JI. .!. Georg Parks, Treasurer of Ottawa County, Grand Haven, Mich. Augustus W. Taylor, Judge of Prnate. Ottawa County. i'ort-Omra I'Mrrm Ottawa Center. Court day, Firt and Tbir I Mandstr of each M-.clh. J. D. Vandervoort, Justin f the Peace and Land AjrnU fiflicc in'bi new build ing. oi'iMirit the pot-ffire, Wabii:eto St., Oram! Harm. MhIi. James Sawyer, County Surveyor. Pe.H-Oflice Addre.-; Latmanviie, C'tuaa Count v, Mich. Win, II. Parks, Atmrw-y and Coun- aeiorat Law. Office n Washington StrM-to'P ;if o 1 t Cony, Church. Atwood & Akeley, Counselor at " Lacy orBec,iui.cooraoK. t'jr!fritr-, XVa.hinclon Street, tirand Haven, Mirh. Grosvenor Reed, Attorney ami ( oniie1nr at Law, an I Suloitor in Chancery. Office. XVabinjrton treet, firtt dwr Lact of tha llirlwre nr. J. B. McNett, IMiywinnan.l Sur.n. OISce.iein l l'r aWe Nrw Orrirt , Vah. tngton htret. tru-l Harm. Mirh. S. Munroe, Physieiati m Sur.-oti. 0!fic at bia reiliuie, Wathington Ui-et, (lran.1 Havo, Mi' h. Henry Griffin, Drut, Commis sion Merrhaut an'4 tJueral AjtiL Corner c-f Wathiiifton anl lt Street Wm. M. Ferry Jr.. Manufacturer of Stationary and Marina, Li-h vt low rc ura Kojcine. Mill tiearinj. Iron anl Urana rulings Ottawa Ir'B WirV. Ferryrf. Ottawa Co., Mich. Post-Offlc aUreaa, (Jrand Haven, Mieh. John II. Newcomb, Dealer in Dry Oooi, Orerie, ProTifina, Croekery.llari ware, Dootn and Shoe, etc. SUU Sir!, Mill Tflnt, Mi-h. William Wallace, Grwer an I Pro- -iion Merchant. One J-y-r bc!w thf Vtl Office, Wahinr'" PtreeL Cutler, Warts &. Stedgman, Doal- trt ia (Icncml Mcrchandi, l' rk. 1 l.r. Salt, lirain, LuinVer, Kbingletand Lath. Water Ft., Grand Haven, Mich. Rhodes & Co., Whlsali ami Rtail (rocer. Provi'ion an t Tec I iKalerr-, Firt Street, (Jrand Haven. Noah Perkins, Doaler in Dry Cools fliwerief, ProiMonf Iroekary, Hardware, ltooM aud Shoe. Ac Oppii tha t..re of J. 11. ewsitnl. State rt., Mtll IVmt. Mich. Jas. Patterson, Dealer in Xewia- pera, Peri.idieal. S bool Ilo"k, Slatiooery; alio Ietr .it Dailiea aud Wf-llic. Yankee Notion, Tcbaero, l'i?ar, Candle. Nut, Ae. Firt d-wr blow lirilTin' Urujj Store, Vah infU'O Street. J. T. Davis, Merchant Tailor, Dealer ia Ocnta FurnUhinjt OoU, Broadcloth, Ca. aimerea, Vetlinjr. Ae. Shop, Wathinjrn St. next door ti the Urg Store. J. St F. W. Fechheimer. erchant Tailor. Dealer ia Ready-Ma le tMMn and GenU Furnishing Uood. Broadcloth. Cafi more, Veling Ac. At tha rt-0fflcc, Wh tnirton Stmt, Grand Harco. Porters & Mathison, Manufactur- rrtf and Dealers ia C'lothinc (JooJu. No. IS, Canal Street, Uraod Uapidn, Mi-b. Ferry & Co., Manufacturer of Lum- Ker, Lath, Timber, Pirkcta, Ac., and Peeler, la all klndl of Merrhaadi. Prori.wo, Shin, trie Bolta and Shingle. Ferrt.Tille, M bit Kiwr, Micb. Ferry & Son, Manufacturer an,i Wboeal and Retail Dealer in LamWr.Shin. ;le, 1-ath, Ticket, Timber Ac. rtu.inex Of Bee. Water Street, Orand Haven, Mich., and 139, Adam Street, Chicago, 111. Soot & Shoe Manufacturing anl Ro- peiria; Shop. (ap rtair.) over Wallae'i ttre. Wa'hinjton Street, Grand Haven. V. Kt"rv, ren. R. c. F0S1IA. laouero I t 4 I 1 1 I f 2 I lrolainn I 2 1 31 7 1 leoluinn t 7 10 IS I M I ?H 3" TWILIGHT, tr Aixto miio. Tier l a tint at twiL'rht' eve. That the heart I aoethed to ret ; And the wild tumult of the I ra.t, Lie calm, eaccfuL aod blent. At twilight' eve, the wearied mind, Findrtt in gi ldcn thought, Aud fvtd tceinori'. (teal ba k again Of bj Lwr youthf ul rport. At twi!jglit eve, I love to it, And ponder o'er the pat; Chafing each halcyon thought Of tboe I lun the hetf. TJIC RLWAKD OF COL'I'.TEST. A few j ears ago, on a raJiant after noon, lo wen, who from their conserva tion ajjeareJ to be forx-irjers 8tojjxJ U'fure tha at of one of our large work hop in lMiiladeljIiia, for tha manufacture of locomotive engine. EnU-ring aauiall office, the cM'.st of the men inquired of the ,uj-ririteii lent in atlnJarH-o if he wouM jern)it thorn to insrct the) worka. You can -ass in and look about, if you j.lfaso;" ail the Ktij-enntetKlviit, vexel aj'j'arontlv at lelng inteiruj'ted in the jx-rusftl of hw ncwjJijors. lie then vanned the lrar.e-rs mre clly. Thy were ri"i tfully but lainly clad, and e ilently !iad no rreteri.sions to of ficial dignity of any kind. 44 1 there any one ho can ahow u.h ovr tliA .tablishimnt and eij.lain mat Urs to us!'' aske.1 Mr. Wolfe, the elder of the atraip r. You mut lick your own way gentle men," replied the niju'rinU'tidf-nt, we are all too busy to attend to every party hat comes along. I'll thank you not to interrupt the workmen by asking ques tions." J I was not so much tho matter, a the manner of his rej.lv, that was offensive to Mr. Wolfo and his ompnnion. It U kjxiWlq will: a tTitaii) oillciaj atMiuij tioii of aiiiK'fiority, miiiolol with cin tetnjit for the visitors, indieaU-d a haugh ty and seltUh U-mjvr cn the j-art of Uio sjicaker. 1 tlimk w o w ul not trouble you, miiJ Mr. Wolfe, bowing; and taking hunoin raniota arm they jse-l out. " If there i any thing I dislike it is in civility," aaid Mr. Wolfe, when tliey were in the htrH t I do not blame tl man for ikI wUhing t") t.how u over his es tablishment ; ho is no doubt annoyed and interrupted by many heed lest vihitori; but ho might have dl-missed us with courtesy, lie might have sent away Ix tter content with a gracious refusal, than with an ungracious confent. l'trhais we bhall have Utter luck here," said the other stranger; and they stopped before another workshop of a similar kind. They were ret ired by a brisk little man, the hd clerk apjArent ly, who in reply to their request to bo shown over the establishment, aiujwcrvd, Oh yes! Collio wilh low g.iAlclVieli. This way." So saying, he hurried them along the arena strewed with irou bars, broken and rusty wh-vls ( iron, frag ments of old t jliuders, into tho priiicij-al workshop. Here, without stopping to exolain anv one thing, he led the strangers along witli tho evident intention of getting rid of them as soon as ossiLle. When they ul where the workmen were riveting the external castings of a Nier, the cWk looked at his watcli, tappl his right fx't against an iron lube, and showed other ngtiS of impatience. Whercujj'n Mr. Wolfe remarked, We w ill not detain you longer sir," tnd with his friend took h-ave. "This man is an improvement on tho other," said Mr. Wolfe, M but all the civil ity he has is on the surface; it does not como from trie heart, wo must iook further." The strangers walked on for nearly half a mile in silence, when one of them joiutod to a picture of a locomotive engine with a train of cars underneath. It over topped a titnall building, not more than ten feet in height, communicating with a yard and workshop. "Look," said tiro observer, Mhert is a machinist whose name is not on our list. rrolably it was thought too srcsll a concern for our pur- .," said his companion. M Neverthe less lot us try it," wiid Mr. Wolfe. j hey entered, and found at the desk a tnid.Ilc-aged man, whoti grimmr aspect anl aron nntnd his waist, shewed that he divided his labors between the work shop an1 th count ing-tocm. " W want U look ovei yotjr wirks, if you hav no 4jAr-tiin.M M It will rive me great pleasure to show you all there f to be seen," said the me chanic, w ith a plcasel alacrity, ringing a bell, and telling the boy who entered to take cLarge of the office. He then lead tho way, and explained to the strangers the whole process cf con htructing a ! cotnotive engine. I le show ed them how the various parts of the machinery were manufactured, and ta tiently answere.1 all their piestioUs. He told them of an improrod molo of lull ing loilers, by which the power of gene rating steam was increavxl, and showi-l with what care he provided fr security from bursting. Two hours passed rapidly away. The strangers were delighted with the intelli gence, displayed br the mvhaniV, and i ...(. .... .:... i ... V tua tfiKWSStUMU'S aaaMUi'VCC'ua manners. M Here is a man who lives his r.rofessien so well, that he take pleasure in explaining its mysteries to all who can understand them.' thought Mr. Wolfe. 44 1 am afraid we have given ou a deal of trouble," said the other stranger. "Indeed, gTithmen, I hare enjoyed four iit," said tho mechanic, 44 and shall a glad to soo you again." 44 1'crhaps we may," said Mr. Wolfe and the Strang rs lej nrted. Five months afterwards as the niw han h with limited mentis sat iu hi offiee, mtxliuting how Ijirl it was to get busi by the tide of nn h large establish ments as were his competitors the two strangers tiitervl. He pnve them a brarty wel-ne, handel chairs arnl s:t down. "W come," sai.l Mr. Wolfe, with rojs:tioiis to ou from tlio KmjTor cf lussia." " From the Emjwr ! I mo.sible T 44 Hero are our eredi titials. 44 Hut, gentlemen," wiid the uow agita to 1 tnorhanic, ' what doe this tneniif How have I earned such an honor!" 44 Simply by your straiiforward courU- y an,l fnitikneiktoUib;ii! wi'Ji profess-, ioiml ititollijjetK-e, said Mr. Wtilfi.-. " Ihhuho wo were strangers you did not think necessary to treat us with distrust or coldness. You saw we were in earn est in acquainting ours-Ie.s w ith ) our works hd n -l ak us U.forc extei.d ing to us your civilities, what letters of introduction we brought. You meas ured us by the spirit wo sliowol, aud not br tho dignities wo could have ex hibit." Tho nuvhanic isitel St. Peterabugh, and soon afterwards me.vel his whole es tablishment there. Ho had imj'erial or ders for as manv l.comities as ho could contruct. Ho has lately returne.1 to his own country, and is still receiving largo returns from his Russian workshop. And all his prosj-erity grew out of his unself ish civility to two strangers one of w horn was the secret agent of the Czar of Rus sia. Custkxtmkxt. I have a rich neigh bor who is always so busy that ho has no leisure to laugh; the w hole business of his lifo is to get money, that he may still get more and moro money. He u still drudging ou, saying that Solomon sajs "Tho diliigent haid maketh rich." And it is true, indeed; but lie considers not that it is not in the power of riches to make a man happy f r it w a w iv ly sail by a man of great observation that "there lo as many miseries beyoixl riches as on this side of them." And yet (! deliv er us frtm pinching jovirty, and grant that, having a con-.jete!cv, we may bj content and thankful. I't us not repine, or so much as think the gifts of God un eouallv d alt, if we see another abouud w nit rienes w nen, as vj u Knows me cares that are the keys that keen those riches hang often so heavily at the rich man's girdle that they dog him w ith weary days and retloss nights even when others sleep quietly. We see but the outside of the rich man's happiness; few consider h'm to be like the silkworm, that, when she seems to play, is at the ery same limo spinning her ow n bowel and consuming herself. And this manr rich elo loading themselves with corrtsding cares to kec'p what they have already got. Let us therefore, be thankful for health and com petence, and, alovo all, for a ouiet con science. Izaak N alten. Tattlixo. Like a bell that's rung for fire; like a ceaseless auction crier; mis chief making, stopping you with quaking fear, whispering, as you lend an car, "Mercy ou us did you hoar I Rty Raker has a beauT I e letters are generally only a sj cies of 'Kf' patr! EATB tKC. no. 28J RL'PORT OF T11E COMMITTEE ON EX. TIRING LAWS. Tho committee on Expiring Laws to whom was referred a bill to repeal sen tion 2383 of the Compiled Laws relating to qualities! voters in school meetings ing considered tha same, ak have to re jiort. Tho quc-lion involved is simply, wheth er il i advisable to ptrmit negros tojar ticijAte equally with white citizen in school distriet meetings. Your committee are nt ni!ied that a (rojHisition of that nature should ever iae eliciled a difference of pitun in a civilized community. Yet, as a diversity of opinion d-e exUt they will bri-lly state sotno ef tho reavr.s which occur to them, wnv a descendant ot tne Atncan race shoufd have no fellowshiji, sxial or joliiieal, with whito persons. History, sr.cred or prufane, has failed to furuih any eviden that the negro sj-rung from the same origin with the white man. IMausible naturalists have maintained that he is not strictly man or lieast, but a sort of hvbrid, or connecting link letwee:i man aul the lower animal. Without pausing to s tile this vexe ques tion, your oom:nillv ary of the opiuinii, tliat, as ho is au inferior ln'ing, ho is not entitled to the privileges and immunities of tho sujerir. As a race, tho African has made no pncrs, exept through the remote tr immediate agency of slavery. n his ow n cemtinent, at no time er plje, has he advanced in civilization. Cotiimetieitig at the joii.tof the newt abj'vt barbarism, the race siuks lower aiel lower till they approach tho brutes that roam their foto-sLi. Nothing but alavery, as jet, has, l-ecn able tshed a ray of inu lli-p-nco or humanity into their liiiightsl mind. Your Coiumitteo confess and de plore tin -so truths. An t iiiincnt Kngli-h w rit r, w ho con curs iu many e.f the views cntertaine-l l) ititllctujl and phrsira) ergnijvtion 'f tLe African, says: 44 In all the ntticularj just enumerated, tho negro stni. tnre npj romhes uneuiv caliy to that of llio monkey." "It not only differs from the Cuca. ixin nil lej, but is distinguishesl from it iu two respvLs. Tho inteivtual charac teristk-s are reliK-el, the animal feature enlarged and exaggerated. Tlu's inferior ity ef faculties, may 1 provel not so much by tho unfortunate U'ings who are d''grall by slavery, as by every fact in the past hiatorv and prewnt coteliti' ii uf Afik-a." Such may lo reganld a the univer sal opinion of mankind. Rv tho Knglish commjn law, 44 the negro i;ad no rights which the white man was lound to re sect." Every State in thi L'niou (New llarnphiro esj-cinlly iiK-ludel) lias ujn-u her statute looks laws which direvtly er by unavoidable implication, deprive the negro of the rights privileges and fran-iiiL- of cilii. (iovemed by the same principles all tho States formed eut of tho territory embraces! in tho ordinance cf 187 have imiv.d uj-oti him j-!iti-.nl disability; and to sevtiro and pe-rjicluate the elividing line U twvn the negro aid a citiz- n, according to the ordinances of heaven, each e f them has incoqieraUsl such disability in her organic law, by a nearly unanimous Votoof the p-oplo; aud so strong ha lxyn this sentiment that some e-f them have gono so far as to f r lid him even a renting place ujmn their soil. Tempted by tho foregoing inve terate trocedents tho Supreme Court if the Jnited States has lately decided that a d'scendant of tho African race have no status in our federal court. Although lhat court, from its habitual ly conservative cliararter, is far behind the ,e formed under the aegis of the gical majna charta of 1780, yet your commit tee think it is plainly di-coterable, iu the opinion alluded te that if the peint had been at issue, tho court would have de cided lhat tho ne-gro is not, and fUr the credit of humanity ought not to bo a citizen of tho United States. If motive of policy required, the decision of that august tribunal might lie disregarded, as not being applicable to this sovereign State, in her jobce regulation touching this unfortunate race. Yet the fact can not be disguised that the pat amount ju dicial tribunal of this State, movel by the settled maxims of tho law, and im pressed with a lively sense of the inferior and degraded character of the n'gro, has lately, aole mtly adjudged that be is not only not entitled to the rriv ilnrw of a cit- uen and a man, but that from bis inhe- J rent offensiveneis may be excluded from his presence. Whatever might !e their privato opin ion, your committee fstl bourd to defer to that decision till the same le re verod. Were the black equal to the w hite race in poiut of intellet t, your committee wo'kl still bo compelled to admit, that in tho breast of every refined while man, there is implanted, by his Creator, an invinci ble repugnance, to fellowship with tho no grt. To tlisregnrd this impulse of our nature, i to violnto the laws of our so cial and moral N-ing. and to remove it by legislation, is to re-nl the wilt of Heaven by mortal laws. Your eorumit.-o nrv ui unmindful ! tho f:tct that pohlkal parties have arisen aud flourished (or a while ujou negro .r.. V, e ,:. r el . v .J .......... ... V( ......... ...vt can bo regarded only a j-e-riodical social excreseenivs which a returning sense ef deerncy will s.in slough from tho b-Iy jK.'l.tic; nor are they unmindful that mem-U-r-i f I'gislalive Udi'-s lin sometimes, so far forgot their duties to their race, as to prose rit the j- tition of negroes pray itg f r black and white sisial esjuality, and make strenuous e iTorls to pl:ies: them selves on a level with tho jh titiote rs. To such legishitt.ri your commitUv most bvoutly exclaim, thank (ud that they are n--t as such nen! It is ln-j-s that sm h a are panting, with groan unultcr ah!t for negro nssiation, will 1 cvn-; t ntol with sj-vi.d laws giant ing to them elves exd;isiely a nioiiop ly of that lux ury. It is coumiI'TisI by state. men that the presence e f an inferir r:ice i injurious to the suj-ri.'r; that it tends more to do grade the latter than toelevj.to I ho form er. Hence, it too!ues the duty ef the sur-erior, as a undo ,.f preservation and cif dotation, t take eve ry step j isti'ied by humanity to remove the ol.noxioiis race, or at leftt to s'o that the elividing line Utwecn the races r3 maintain.sl. "Evil e'ommun!atie.n e-t.rrupt go.l manners." Thrs ndmouitioii is strikingly exenq lified in Iho fae.t that there riro wliitee jiersems among us, 1 tear ing the imngi'snd sufeervrijtii!j of white me-n, who lit. -rally e!okv.ic d bv an un!:a!lowesl Atlrlinu f-r a race iijhti whiih he-aveti, after stsmj ing it with in feriority, pla.es! e n a remote continent and imrked the ed ji-ct eif diviti-' indigna tion with a el grading color, r.s if to pro serve and jierjs tuate his inscrutable fore irdinatHin. Against such tnorbi I affec tions your eommitlco proUst, and therev (r rcjert tin bill and recommend it pas.sago, and that they U discharges! from further consideration thereof. All of whie h i rospoe tj'ully submittesl. T. F. RROIUIEAD, Chairman. A ODE TO A MtKEn:il. Yu wiked ldu-1 suekcr, by ibiaiit You urn vur livin nun wa lienide I.itinjr il-'Wii on peuple and murl n yura 11 ( l ii to z,i tin I, litiil i. n F.W"i ii'.e and whin tl.a k-it in ad an litjcin t ;, lcMc' llaint yni p..t no fcrltnk ? tirvat c.ikvr! how vu.lejrit n.M-ked if you wa A lirjj a um l.i I, jrd l.lud u kcr a u Round l erc, w.t war kl.i-c. Whl Wont yn Lite d"iin a Ilia an t U.-.U cm f re Tha uo it. withoat lmli. ri j oil the wl.jl- I Vur a kaotlxd ! y"i do a Li.' buni on a Siuaal kail, yoa .u k iuro Llo'nl out .f a Fl!-r than a Wcijnt ran, and yurv dueller Airit l.alT 'n. Yu wiiVe up f. ke Wlicu tha ar.lr. j io, and tha ir Venfti. IIuv .In yu wurk it to krap Yure 111 m rharp Without jrraidin Whi I. nt yu !-( k w urru owt of tree'. A cte nel, you l"i' t lc)f.'d rur ? Whnt fe.wn I it ru ynt; o mirh. lining' r.wJ ami yure fttl.tr h't "ph. Seakeo hume you tua devowvr mm body J V m in tu to a kin t n ti I bur I from yure Synj;in, aud on; louili when yure lluiijcty i"t. I hml tbynk yud wanton Root or panty le-K tu kee-p yure long Leg froiu be in k'.al I thy wetiier. IniH'k your ueelie. yn kaut ebaw, butt Yure umin on nen, ka yu net ir tilt wtane-d. I jvk, a Jew. ITEMS. Horse vs. Men. "Why, eloctor," said a lady, yeu talk a though a hor.-e was better than a manr "He is" thedoctir; "ho never deceive a lady lie bridle his tongue he follows no fash ions and ho hates hoe'p !" When the tailor !ksl at tho Falls of Niagara, with its thick cloud of spray, ho exclaimed, "(iod 1 w hat a place to Rjonge a coat T When a black republican politician looked at a neat in the Michigan. Legisla ture, with all its facilities for sacrificing the interests tf the r-eople, to the "high est bidder," he mentally exclaimed, 44Gi!s! what a p'aee to snge th I plef HlScr.LLAXEOCS ITEMS. . - The reason w by some jeeple put on airs is U-causo they have nothing else to put on. There L only one bad w ifo in the werM, and every crusty husband thiuk that she i fallen to his" lot. A rah young mnn ha thre atened to apply tho Maine liquor law to his sneol-hinrt, ho intoxicates him o. Tho won.an who held her tongne for fitlee-n minute-, has U-en se nt te the Lunatic Asylum. A g'xd many flv ing rumors eif the lay would le more appropriately designa led by taking ff tho F. Snow kr or Ru:Kik. The wife of Mr !!.rM- f.f P.iOrinmilli 'm r-w.l, rrese-nted lo r husland with three Cno ba bies two l-'vs aud a girl. - Tho moeiueet of all tcean things is tho man who slanders under a mask of piety. A horso d aler, devribing a used up horo, aid ho looked "a if ho had boon esliting a daily now spaje'r." Small Newsley to Horrifies Dandy "Won't you rateh my 'cad Mister; my 'and is so coll I can't f A Dutchman's heart rending seililo- 1 1 1 v is dentilid thu: " S!elo(cs hhoti Kickle so much iser as I, pocauso hes id ksj.le toll-rs mote ns I hasT A vemng carpenter having lnvn told that "tho courMj of truo love ucver did run snnsdh," toek his piano tind'T his arm wln-n he weiit eenuting. A wag rus ho don't care a fj whether thev get anv currrntM through tho Atlantic cable or not, but ho would like a few fredl 7eic. " Jeff, w hy am em like tho Cislar I" 44 1 guv's it up, Sam; 1 can't tll jou." 44 Ctt.v voit stnvs orten buh sumiuor and winter." - rasliioiiablo wenneu arc articles m.niiufaetiind by milline-rs: They want but litt'e here below. And want that little f r hov. Kissing a pretty girl 44dow n Seuth," a yoit'gt? ntemnn akesl her "what made her fo sweet!" "Oh," she replies!, in nt tor innHS is e, "my father is n sugar plan ter." An exchange paer fay that tho most dignifies!, glorious and lovely wk of nature is woman; tho next, man; and thirdly, the Dork shire pig. 41 Why in tho world do you plant Uiled pe.taLos Mr. O'FIalu-rly !" 44 Shu re, jer honor, I'm g..in' to try the ixpirimint of raisin' them already biles! for my own ait in'." "Miss Drown, I havo bocn to Joarn how to tell fortuniss" sai l a young man to a brisk brunnotte. "Ju,t give mo your hand, if )ou plea.se." " Ijv, Mr. White, how sudden yeu are! Weil, g. ak ra." 1 1 is said to J.O dangerous to le working with a sewing machine, near a window when there is a thunder 6torm. It is dangerous to sit near some serving machine's w hen there is no thunder stewm. 44 What is the me aning of a backbi te r?" said a reverend gentleman during an examination nt a parochial school. This was a puzzler. Il went elown the las till it came to a simple urchin, who said, 4Torliaps it be a fle a." 44 Pomjeoy, what am eJat goes wheu do wngoti gs stejs when do wagon stops, it am no u .o to do w agon, and yet do wagon can't go without it!" "I gubselnt up, Clem" " Why, elo noie, of course, yvu stupid black nigga." "Ladies ard gentlemen," said a show man 4he're you Lave a magnificent joiintitig of "Daniel in tho lions den." Daniel can easily bo distinguished from tho lions by the green etten umbrella under his arm." "What are you doing f" emeried a gentleman to a dilapidated urchin, who was circulating through a crowd of oeuV tieians liolding eut his band. Nothin' only tryin' to take the irne v( tho meet ing. A elanJy who had a ".srendid" mus tache, luring asked at a party to favor the ladies w ith a song, replied that he "real ly aw couldn't recollect the tune." A b-auty who was near exclaimed, "Oh, bar! how can lhat be when the hair(AlR) i hanging on your very 1'pT She has since been married lo him; fen 1 her right for her irppudenec.