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VOL. XIII.--NO. 2D. MORRISTOWN, TENN., WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 8, 1879. By JOHN E. HELMS. Zi JLL- .J..L J,L . TIE MORRISTOWN GMFTE Subscription Price, $2. MORRISTOWN, TENNESSEE SOUTHERN NEWS ITEMS. A camphor tree is flourishing in Tam pa, Fla. Norfolk is to have a steamship line to Liverpool. Grass is growing in the streets and alleys of Memphis. Charleston is to have a - velocipede ournameiit. The eotton mills in the South are run night ami day. Hon. S. "McLin, ex-Secretary of State of Florida, is dead. Na-shville ha sent one hundred barrels of Hour to Memphis. The bell-punch law is shutting up many saloons in Dallas. . The Norfolk peanut dealers have agreed to sell peanuts hereafter hy the pound. Game was never so plentiful as now in Mississippi tiver counties. Ediscn's agent is hunting for mineral platir.um in vNorth Carolina. There is $4,500,000 in cash and bonds in the Suite treasury of Texas. Montgomery, Ala., has over one hun ilred new buildings going tip. . . The Indians of Western Texas use cotton-wood leaf tea for snake bites. Quite a number of Texas farmers have put in their second crop of corn. In Mobile piekjoekets are so numerous that it is becoming danwrous for ladies to walk the streets. Jefferson parish, La., does a large milk imsiness, selling 100,000 gallons, Worth $ hhi.ooo a year. Students who take the benefit of the Texas State normal school are required to teaeh five years. Baton Rouge has appointed a commit- icc ki rui-u ?o.j,wv ior uie repairing 01 uie out rnate-house. The cotton factors at New Orleans be lieve there will be 250.000 more bales received there this seaspu than last. A party of ninety emigrants from Eng land and Scotland, bound for interior Texas, lias just lantteu at Laiveston. There is a bill before the Georgia Leg islature to divide the State funds and estab lish depositories in the principal cities. The planters of Point Coupe, La., are discussing whether or not they should bring sibor iroiu ueorgia to improve their lands. The exodus fever has died a natural death in East Feliciana Parish, La., and everybody, black and white, is picking cot ton. The New" Orleans Board of II ealth pro poses that hereafter no man "shall stable a cow within twenty feet of the lot of an adja cent neighbor. In order to rob the residence of Mr. Theo. Soniat, in . Jefferson parish, La., the burglars chloroformed the entire family, con sisting of eight persons. Among the colored refugees in Kansas is an entire Baptist church of three hundrde and nine persons from Delta, Louisiana, led Ly their pastor and deacons. A negro at Murfreesboro, Tenn., aged one hundred and three, has just marri" j'J seventh wife, .who is- thirty-two. The old suan has twenty-seven children The widow -of Alexa-aer Campbell, the founder of the Cpbellite or Christian! vimrcii, is-uyin-; with her ROI1in.iaw CoL rarcly, neac-iillsboro, in Alabama. In tb.e JIustings Court, Richmond, the other day, a prisoner was both prosecuted an 4 defended by negro attorneys. This is "probably the firt case of the sort on record A negro woman in the employ of Dr. Iiigsr of Callereue, Ala., poisoned the whole family by mixing morphine with the T?oH'ee. None have died, but several are seriously in danger. Natchez, Miss., has built a cotton fac tory, every dollar of the stock in which is owned by her own citieens, and which h yielding the very handsome return of nearly twenty per cent, on the investment. A witness in a case before Judge uarles, of Nashville, declared that he did not believe in God, heaven or hell, where upon the Judge ruled his testimony out of court For months this year there, has not leen a drop of water in the Ri tlrande for a distance of about five hundred miles. There is great suffering of the people of that dis trict in consequence. A member of a. leading cigar firm in Jacksonville says that it is susceptible of proof that Mvtidie Florida can raise as good tobacco fryr cigars as Cuba, but that the farm ers do, -not understand curing it. ' Memphis Appeal : We are getting to be a yellow-eyed race ef people in Memphis. It is the fever poison, that has been absorbed into the svstem during the epidemic that pro duces yellow eyes ; at least so say the dis ciples of Galen." , . - ' - ' The last; Alabama Legislature -appropriated $10,000 for the benefit of the maimed Confederate soldiers in the State, Three hundred and thirty-two applications were made, and the pro rata share of each one was fixuil at $30 12. . : , - Memphis Avalanche : A sluggish filthy n-ir - ..i . -m in is tt on river, in tact, n is nothing more than an extremely dirty bayou full of vegetable poisons. Yet we are not only compelled to drink Wolf river water, but when there is high water in the Mississipp river, our drink isdiluted with the wash from one thousand live hundred privy vaults. Houston Telegram : Two more gentle men innocent, of course are to stretch hemp in Northern Texas the Brown broth ers, at Denton. This. is one of the results of the health, anti-criminal views of the class of immigration from the old States now drifting into the northwestern counties, and who don't relish the assassination business. Harrison (Va.) Valley: A man named Win. Dean, living on top of the Blue Kidge, above Roadside, w the father of twenty-one children, all'of one mother. His mountain home overlooks the- beautiful valley at his feet, and he ami his family rejoice in good health. His fields can' be readily discerned Mtothe valley for miles away. The Mexican citizens of San Antonio celebrated the anniversary of Mexican inde pendence on the 15th instant. They had a brass band and a. procession to. San Pedro,. Springs, where . an nration was delivered. vivas for Mexico uttered, songs sung, mezeal j drank and Greaser enthusiasm indulged in i ad libitum Corinth (Miss. tlecord: Jack Har rell, in digging a well on, his place in Prentiss county, exhumed thi' :skeleton o a man at the depth of forty-tfcree feet 'below the sur face of the earth. He also obtained several gold coins of the Fifteenth century, bearing the superscription nuul coat of arms of Ferdi nand and Isabella. The Jacksonville (Fla.) Sun and Press asks: " Will sotate meutrai onm explain why or how it is ih: the hegro is never known to Bneeze? Ask any old planter, who owned ticores of servants, and he Mill tell you he never heard one of his. wrvants sneeee. It may appear a very jsiugular fact, but -it is none the Jess' true; and we allude to it just to bhow how unobservant most jieople are.".' 1 Prof. Bibikov of Columbia, S. C., wont over to Georgia, and at a place alJout sixteen miles from Augusta, on the Georgia railroad, he came to a wall of lignite in the side of a hill, about twelve feetrthi;k, whieh proved to be a first-class brown coal. He estimates that the quantity of this deposit is so large that if it were on the market, at this time its value would not be less than two millions of dollars. Wilmington (N. CJ) Star; . James B. Young, Postmaster, aiid W. J. Young, Depu ty Postmaster, n.t Cameron, Moore county Mere arrested' at that place, by Special Agejrit George P. Chamberlin, for robbing or rilling and detaining registered mail. The accused parties were taken before a magistrate on the tame day aud bound over for their appea ance at the next term of the United States Court at Raleigh, Houston Telegram : It is a curious fact that a city of 25,000 inhabitants, with a tax able assessment of $o,313,000 at one per cent., amounting to $53,130, can not collect suffi cient money to cover expenses and prevent the wholesale issuance of taxpaying scrip, which is now offering at any . rice that caM be obtained for it ny the fcJiployes of the city, and which can not be sold in Houston to-day for over thirty cents on the dollar. Memphis Avalanche : As an incident of the present epidemic, showing the alrntct complete depopulation of the citv, the Jew ish New Year, which was ushered in last night and celebrated by divine worship at the teniple, corner of Main and Exchange streets, special permission lor which -was granted by lion. John Johnson, the congregation num bered only twentv'Six. Under ordinary cir cumstances the building would have been crowded to excess. nanotte (:. J.) Uoserver: A curi osity is presented by a citizen of Davidson College. He sends a box of grapes, which are similiar in appearance and taste to the ordinary winter grapes that grow abundantly in the woods, throughout this section of North (. arolina, but they diner very widely from thera in that they are entirely withont seed. A grape without seed is surely a novelty in these jwirts. They are growing on the planta tion or apt. A. J. Oray, near iuooresvuie, and the vine has been known for eight years, and never has there been found a seed in any oi the truit produced thereon. Savannah (Ga.) News : The rice plant ers tell considerably relieved on Wednesday when the time for the usual gale had passed by. The water threatened to be very high, as it was the highest spring tide ot the year, and the moon was in perigee, something not ofteu occurring in this season, hence there wasa'general anxietv felt as to the result, With a blow from the northeast, the water would have swept over the banks of the rice uems anu occasioneu great tiamage. insieau, however, or the dreaded wind, there were onlv pleasant breezes from the south and southeast, and the danger greatly diminished, hence the sausiaction of the nee planters. Col. Brewer, Auditor of Alabama, said in a recent declaration, in alluding to the r,esult of a general negro exodus: "White labor would no longer come in competition with the black labor; there would be no vast hordes of unskilled laborers to butcher the lands and wreck the homestead, there would be no squalor, and but little idleness ; fewer enmos and more intelligence. V hue cottages would begin to fleck the landscape as the torrent of immigration came pouring in ; til lage would be more thorough and its imple ments more perfect; schools and churches would be sustained as the population thick ened, and our children' educated at home as the standard of education was advanced, and the marshes were drained. New Orleans Democrat: M. DeLes seps, the celebrated French engineer, has by letter informed the Chamber of Commerce of this city that during his visit to this country, which he intends making in a short time, he intends to take in New Orleans, and he ex presses a desire to address the chamber while in this citv on the subject of the isthmus canal. The date of his arrival in New Orleans isjiot fixed by him, and as the Chamber of Commerce has no knowledge of his pro gramme, they can not name the probable time, However, when he does come there can be no doubt but that he will meet with a reception befitting his reputation and his standing among the great engineers of the world. I I Patent Buffer. .t was a reporter on a live daily who had glued his lynx eye to the keyhole of a Baldwin Hotel room the other day, when he was disgusted to find, on look ing up, that the occupant of the apart ment was beaming benevolently down on him from the transom. "Day, day!" said the guest, cheerfully, "guess you've struck the wrong number. The man suspected of a forgery and being a poli tician is next door, and the man with four wives is just across the hall." "I really inns' excuse," stammered the for-once abashed special. "Not all don't mention it," pnt in the boarder, jumping down and pulling the quilldriver into tbJe room. "Fact is, I was just laying for one of you fellows ; knew ytmd be along presently." "Want to be interviewed?" "No. 1 want to show you press gentlemen- a little invention of mine that ought to be in the possession of every reporter in the country," and it will be, too. I expect to sell no end of 'em to your paper alone." "Do, eh?" "Certainly. I call it the reporters patent combined spiral spring and India-rubber nose-buffer. You have often, in the fulfillment of your duties, had the door through which you were look ing opened most unexpectedly, inflict ing a severe blow upon the nasal ex tremity. This sometimes leads to in flammation, especially where the key hole is brass ; gangrene sets in, lockjaw, death t Now, all you fellows have to do is to carry a patent buffer, put up in one of these elegant morocco cases, and" -But the newspaper man made a dash for the elevator and escaped. San Francisco Post. just Before Dawn. "Ah I Heaven does indeed temper the wind to the shorn lamb," pathetically said old Mrs. Diffendorf er the other evening at a tea . fight, after putting away her twenty-eighth cup of Young Hyson. " Why, what do you mean ? " "You know that young widow, Mrs. Biffen, who lives across the street from us ? Well, she has had nothing but sor row, trouble and distress for the past five years: First her father was killed by a burglar ; then her mother married a nigger-minstrel; after that she had the yellow fever and small-poi together ; and next her husband failed, and she had to take in washing. It was per fectly dreadful. The poor woman nearly went crazy. She was just be ginning to bear up a little again, when her brother was sent np to the peni tentiary for life; and, finally, last month her husband died in a fit, and the very next day her baby choked to death on a gum-drop." "Gracious! the poor thing! " "Wasn't it just terrible? Everybody believed she'd commit sui- cide then; and she would have done so, to, but last week somebody providen- tially coaxed her to go to a church-raffle and what do you all suppose hap pened?" "What, for heaven's sake, what?" "Wliy, she won a seal-skin sacque!" "You don't mean it?" "She did, though perfectly splendid came within an inch of the floor. The dark est hour is just before dawn after all Now, isn't it? "San Francisco Post' Mute Animals. In his lecture on Claude Bernard, M. Paul Bert narrated a singular stratagem which was invented by Bernard during the late Franco-German war. It was proposed to revictual . Paris, whieh was strictly blockaded by - German forces. A large number of cattle had been col lected, waiting for an opportunity to cross the German lines. But a diffi culty was to silence these animals, as their cries would attract the attention of the enemy. Claude Bernard pro posed to practice upon them the section of the nerve which enables them to emit their usual cries. The operation is bo easy thai it could be executed in a few seconds by an ordinary butcher. None of the animals appeared to suffer in any way by the mutilation which had niado them mute, Mature, DTI MORNING KIBE. BT J. B. MXTDGI. Hie thee on, my noble Gipsy; As the mountain path we raise, Let thy ringing feet, so briskly, Beat the time to merry lays. Quick yonr ear to catch the chimin Of the herdsman's morning bells, And the echoes of the rhyming Glancing down the forest dells. Swell thy nostrils, happy pony; Let thy equine strokes prove tine; Nimbly climb, though rough and stony, Up the pass you bear me through. An I what beauty seems to issue As the frescoed mountains lie Amber streaks, with golden tissue, Sparkling np the eastern sky. How the forest, gently swaying, Lends a magic to the view, And the sun, in fancy playing, Bound the globes of sparkling dew. Slack your speed, my mettled pony; Let yonr iron-bound hoofs be still, While the echoes die off lonely. Circling round from hill to hill. Drink we In this morning pleasure, As the merry mountain birds, When they meet in chorus measure. Gyp 1 those ears speak more than words. Whoa, my boy, be calm, be steady; Do not puU so hard the rein, (spare a moment and be ready. We may bear that song again. Down aslant the blooming meadows, Where the heath in beauty furls; There the misty morning shadows Bathe the checks of roguish girls. There, bedcked with labor's duty, Merry with their happy lot. Sang they sweet and with such beauty, Who wiU guess my morning plot? Cupid, wild and roguish rover, With a steed rpre sleek and fleet, Crossed the meads and new-blown clover, Ana his journey was complete. Lyons, Ohio. SLOW, BUT SURE. BY E. B. W. "How on earth, Simpson," said 1 the other day to a rural friend of mine whom I was visiting-"how on earth did a backward, diffident fellow like you ever manage to say, 'Will you ? ' to a witty, saucy, self-poised woman like your wife?" I really was curious to know. Simpson was such a slow, sedate person, and his wife was such a little firefly, that there always seemed to me something funnily ncongruous in their union. Simpson made his usual deliberate pause before answering. "Well, I reckon" my friend is a Hoosier "I reckon it was queer I ever asked her, and the way it happened was queerer still." We had carried our chairs out into the front yard, in order to smoke in greater comfort ; and I now tilted mine back against a tree, knowing that the story that was brewing in my friend's mind would not be over in a hurry. I condense it for the benefit of those readers who may not have as much leisure and patience as, I flti lou see, lie begam plowly clearing his throat cix i tirOSKino' hi) If era "T -araa iways rather soft-like about Susie, from the time I used to sit by her in school and work her sums. She hadn t a par ticle of head for figures, and I had, so we suited pretty well as long as school lasted ; and Susie, though she laughed at me more than any of the girls, liked me a little, too ; for it isn't in human nature not to like the person that works your sums. I know, because that was about all the way I had of making friends, when I was a boy, and I made a good many. But when our school days were over most of them forgot, but Susie never did. She was the prettiest and most popular girl in the country, and had no end of beaux, but she al ways had, God bless her ! as bright a Smile for slow Ben as any of them. I knew I wasn't as brisk and lively as the best of them, and when I saw that she didn't make any difference, it went right though and through me, and I'd have died for her any minute ; but I couldn't tell her so. Seemed like I was slower and dumber with her than anybody else. " For this reason I didn't often call on her or ask her company to parties and the like; but when I did she was always so kind and pleasant-like that I was happy for a month afterwards. " Well, there was a party one night at 'Squire Coon's; and, as it wasn't far, and Susie would only have to be bored with me going and coming, I asked her to go with me, and she said ' Certainly,' and smiled as if it was the greatest treat in the world. " As the 'Squire's was only half a mile from Susie's home, and there was a nice, dry path through the woods, we walked, it was about the middle of October, and the path we took was heaped with dry leaves that made a pleasant rustle under our feet. A watery moon and a slim turnout of stars gave just light enough to make the tree trunks on either side of the path look like anything else but what they were. " The onlv remark I remember to have made on the way to the 'Squire's was that it was going to rain before morning, and that I hoped it would. I little thought how much reason I had " I don't recollect liiucn aDoui tne party, except that I sat most of the time in a particular corner, and watched Su sie as much as I dared. " When the party had broken up. and we were starting home, I noticed that the sky was thickly clouded and the night dark. The 'Squire, who was sitting on the front porch smoking a late pipe, called after us : ' Better stay all niglit, Benjy, it's goin' to rain.' But we thought not. When we got into the woods, however, we began to find out that it was dark and no mistake. The farther we went, the deeper became the darkness. I knew the path we had to follow, every crook and curve in it. But the carpet of dead leaves bothered me. I had to stop two or three times, and grope about on either side, to make sure that I was in the right track ; and the last time I found I was not in it and. what was worse, couldn't find it. "I kept up the search as long as pos sible, dreading to tell Susie of the stu- tvi3 lJtindfir T had committed. But the trutn nau to come out ac nmv ; nuu, aa u to make matters really serious, it began to rain a dull, pattering fall, that would probably last till daylight, and Susie exposed to it. She tried to make a joke of it at first; but, as the rain came more and more steadily, she became frightened and nervou3. I found her the best shelter I could at the roots of a great tree, but the rain reached her even there. She had nothing round her but a Light shawl for the evening had been unusually warm for the season and I knew she would soon be thor oughly chilled; so, being very tough myself, and used to all sorts of expos ure, I just took off my coat and begged her to wrap it round her shoulders, but she would hear to nothing of the sort, and bade me quite brusquely to put on my coat. But the rain increased, and the night grew damper and colder. I resolved to take matters into my own hands. Without savinff a wnri t -t nappea ine coat arouna ner Rnouiaers myself, and, for fear she wouldn't take it, I said, by way of apology, you 6ee, I'd give my Life for you any minute, Susie, and it don't stand to reason I ahoulda't cxyo you mv cont.' "isne kepi as mute as a mouse wniie x was fixing the coat ; but, when I was done, she took my hand in both of hers, and, says she, 'Do you think so very much of me, Ben?' and, says I, 'More than I can tell, or you can think, I reckon.' "And, says she, Why did you never tell me so before?' " Well,'-says I, ' you know I'm rather slow of speech; and, besides, I reck oned you wouldn't care to hear the like from me.' "She didn't say nothing after that for a good long spell, till I began to be afraid she was offended ; then says she, ' You may sit down here beside me, if you like, Ben.' "I did so, and then, after another good long spell, says she, stroking my hand with one of hers, ' You're the best and kindest man in the world, Ben; and I like you better than any of them.' " My shirt-sleeves were by this time wet enough to wring, and the chill gusts that every now and then swept down from the tree-tops were enough to make a Newfoundland dog shiver ; but I never felt warmer or more comfortable in my life than when Susie said that. I never felt my slowness of speech more in my life, though it seemed as if I couldn't think of any word that meant enough. So I had to sit and listen to Susie with out being able to say a word myself, but she didn't appear to mind it a bit. " Well, the first thing I knew it had stopped raining, and the moon was peeping down through a drift in the clouds. I found the path in no time ; and Susie made me put on my coat again. " When we got home to Susie's, her father was just turning out to look for us, and met us at the yard gate. "'Soaked but smiling,' says he. ' What on earth has happened to make you look so pleasant, when you are both as wet as a couple of drowned kittens ? ' He had a lantern, you see, and flashed it right in our faces. We didn't tell him anything then, but he found out about a month after when I came to ask for Susie." Just at this moment we were inter rupted by a pretty, scolding voice from the house, exclaiming, " Why, Ben, you will catch your death of cold, sitting out there without your coat when the dew is falling." Simpson had been over an hour tell ing his story. Our pipes had gone out and the sun had gone down, but there was still light enough to mark the placid expression of delight that came over his face at the mere sound of his wife's voice ; and I thought I saw plainer than ever before how it had happened that the lively little Susie had married my slow friend, and had done wisely in so doing. f My bird-house is not my own inven tion. I read in some newspaper that an oster-keg made a good bird-house, and an oyster-keg is what you must have in the first place. Most of you know what these kegs are, and can easnv Ret one from some store or some oyster-man. Leave the heads in, and stop up the bung-hole; then cut a round hole, two inches in diameter, in the side, about two inches from the end you design for the floor of your house, and nail this end firmly to a square piece of board large enough to project a couple of inches all round, like a Little plat form. Next, cover the outside of the keg with pieces of rough bark. If you have a wood-pile to go to, you can prob ably find logs from which you can pry off wide, curving pieces that will go half round your little house ; but if not, you must get smaller bits from trees in the woods, and trim them with a knife to fit side by side ; no matter if the joinings are not very close, when the house is fastened on some ar bor or trellis, no eyes but the birds' can possibly see the crevices, and they are not critical, bright as they are. Use small brads for nailing on the bark, and, if driven in a little on the slant, they will hold the bark more securely. For a roof, nail two wide strips of bark to the upper rim of the keg in such a po sition that their upper edges will meet to form a gable just in the middle above the door. It is not necessary to have this roof water-tight, because the head of the keg will keep out the rain ; trim off the upper edges of the bark roof sides so that they will meet closely ,but, if they do not stay together well, bore a few holes and take several stitches with fine wire, and your work will be better. The house will look prettier if you make the roof both wide ind deep, giving what, in a real house, would be called "overhanging eaves." Last of all, fill up the open spaces under the gables with bits of bark trimmed to fit, and nailed to the sides of the keg. Now, your bird-house is complete 1 Nail it on the top of the grape arbor, or in the crotch of a tree, and hang a bit of cotton-wool and a few hairs about the door, which the birds will read as we read the sign "To let," and see if you do not have wrens and blue-birds coming to look at the vacant house, and, at Last, some nice little couple "concluding to rent it for the summer." No matter if your house is not ready until late in the season. I do not think all the birds get to housekeeping before June, and you know often they build more than one nest in the course of the summer; so, unless there are teo many cats about, I think you may be pretty sure of a tenant. When I made my little house, I had no idea it would last more than one summer, but it has weathered the storms of four winters and still looks well. Every spring the wrens and blue-birds squabble and fight for possession of it the wrens, I am sorry to say, always coming off conquerors! And every spring I watch the nest-building from ny window with great satisfaction.- " O'B.," in St. Nicolas for April. 0KlsmMi Maid. I gave $20,000 for her, and sold her in about a year in '70 for $35,000. It is hard to say what she would have brought at her best. She has been taken from the turf. She will have a colt this month. "Who is the colt by ?" By Gen. Washington, a young stallion of perfect form, great vigor, and fine blood. He has the blood of old Lady Thome and Gen. Kent in his veins, and was selected as the best partner for the mare that could be found in the world. The colt will be worth $10,000 in gold the day it is dropped. Of course, it will be valuable; the world will look with great interest to the performance of the coming horse. If there is anything in breeding, he will be wonderful. It was not known whether the Maid would breed or not, as she is 22 years old, but when she was taken from the track a gentleman offered to give $1,000 for the chance of her breeding, and pay all her expenses. Mr. Smith, however, deter mined to own the colt himself, and had her 'put on his own breeding farm. The colt will be born tliis month. She is as vigorous, healthy and active as she ever was. Bud Doble, WIT AXD HUM0E. The weigh of the hog-dresser i lard. Something- ta be looked into A. mirror. Paying the piper Settling with the gas-fitter. Dead 'men tell no tales, but dead walls are well posted. "Fiat Lux," commanded Edison, but Lux somewhat against him. The man who married above his sta tion was a railroad conductor. Chimney-sweeping must be a good business; it soots everybody who tries it. Patience is taught by a fish rod ond line having a worm at one end and a man at the other. To be interesting a speaker should be full of his subject, unless he happens to be speaking against liquor. A sociable man is one who, when he has ten minutes to spare, goes and bothers somebody who hasn't. A frima-donna, according to a Cock ney, is naturally a timid creature, for her art is always in her throat. The summer hotel clerk is now try ing to borrow a dollar to take his dia mond sliirt-stud out of pawn. A fashion authority says the ladies will wear lawn more this summer. A good lawn mower costs $15. It is the opinion of the editor of the Stillwater Lumberman that " Whom the gods love eat cucumbers." Says a sententious writer, "No man is born wise." Just so. If he were wise, he wouldn't care to be born, probably. The amount of pin-money required by the married woman depends on whether she uses diamond pins or rolling-pins. Etiquette says a call should not be less than fifteen minutes in length. Book agents have been known to re main longer. " I've got a frightful cold," some one said to "Cham," "and I don't know what to do to arrest it." " Swallow a policeman." Paris paper When you observe a family sitting about the dinner-table, each member bathed in tears, remember that the horseradish season is upon us. Thebe are some things that are as well kept dark. It isn't policy to throw light upon such a subject as an open barrel of gunpowder, for instance. A Canadian couple, on their way to Dakota to settle, weigh 614 pounds ; the man 310 pounds, and tho wife 304 pounds. Let us hope that they will be careful what they settle on. IN THE SPRING. In the spring, the female fancy Lightly turns to thought of bonnet, With a maze of gimp and ribbons And a bunch of fea hers on it. loUis Times. It is Wlf announced on the authority of an "eminent pnjS:C.1a" that it is not healthy to rise before 8 o'clock 12 f18 morning. This applies only to men. Wives, it is said, can rise at 7 and start the fire as heretofore. The ther day the professor of Ger man asked an unregenerate Junior what the gender of a certain noun was. The Junior quickly replied : "I think it is neuter, sir; at any rate, it is neu ter me." That was a ghastly joke that a sinful townsman played on a stranger whom he promised to introduce to a rich planter, and theri took hird around and presented him to the leading under taker. Tonkers Gazette. A lady engaged to be married, and getting sick of her bargain, applied to a friend to help her untie the knot be fore it was too late. "Oh, certainly," she replied. "It is very easy to untie it now while it is only a beau knot." Vienna has more fine coffee houses than any other city in Europe; the latest statistics put the total number at 400. It was the first city in Christendom that started the institution ; the coffee was captured in bags from the Turks in their second siege of the city, in 1683, and in that year the first cafe was started. A man was found dead at Fifteen Mile bayou, near St. Francis river, Ark. A jury held an inqtiest, and brought in a verdict in accordance with the facts; after which the 'Squire, noticing a pis tol on the person of the dead man, again called the jury together, who found him guilty of carrying concealed weapons, and fined him $25, and some stock of tho dead man was then sold to pay the fine. Ilow Distance Mitigates Our Horror at a Calamity. I&iagination ministers but grudging ly to the feeling of sympathy between man and man. We need to 6ee the ghastly spectacle of mangled remains, to hear the groans of agony and the shrieks of despair, to have some men ace of loss or danger brought home to ourselves or those with whom we have some bond of connection closer thau that of the universal brotherhood, in order to realize tho horror of a great disaster and feel for its victims. The touch of nature that makes the whole world kin is one of universal selfish ness. Perhaps it is a beneficent provi sion that saves us from the strain upon our sympathies," which would make life miserable if we were forced to share in all the sufferings and calamities of the race. The appalling disaster that overtook the Hungarian city of Szegedin was full of multiplied horrors, and had it taken place on the Passaic river it would have filled the columns of our newspapers almost to the exclusion of everything else, blanched every cheek with a sense of awe, filled every heart with pity and dread, and made every task but that of succoring the hapless victims almost impossible. But it is 5,000 miles away. It touches not us. We read of it with a sort of listless wonder at the magnitude of the calam ity, but the most sympathetic nature fails to be at all deeply or keenly af fected by the recital. And yet human life is as precious in Hungary as in New York. Death and bereavement are as pitiful there as anywhere ; loss of home, of friends, of relatives, and of the means whereby men do live, brings the same pangs of suffering, the same deso lation, and the same blight upon life. A city of 70,000 inhabitants is over whelmed in the tremendous flood of waters, as the dikes that held the swollen and straggling river within its confines give way, at 3 o'clock in the morning. Nearly 10,000 houses are swept into ruin, hundreds upon hundreds of their occupants are drowned, and the rest are driven out in the cold winter night in terror and dismay, to seek refuge from the pitiless flood. The neighbor ing country is submerged, 2,000 farm houses are swept away, and a season's crops well-nigh destroyed. There ia pitiful Buffering from Lack of shelter, from want of food, from death in fear ful forms, and time cannot repair the consequences of the terrible misfort une. Yes, we say, it is awful; but we do not feel it we cannot realize it. NEW ADVERTISEMENTS. KNOXVILLE FIESE INSURANCE COMPANY, Office East Tennessee National Bink. CAPITAL STOCK, 3100,000. OFFICERS. I. A.CAItPKNTKK, PFtmorAT. H. Mi-ULl NG.Vn i-PBtmniiKT. COLCS1BLS FOWBLL, Becbtbt A Tbsas." DIRECTORS. JOSKPH JACQUES, A. OALUWKLU E. J. SNKOKD. B. Lt TTKKLL. W. W, VVOOnttUjf'K, !. M. M( (MIKE, V. W. TA Y lil'K, Kb. :. K. LICKV, It t). J AC KSoN. K. H. StcCLl'NG. FINANCE COMMITTEE. .IdSKPH .lAQt'KS. C. M. iHUUKfc, K J SANVIKl. C. K. LUCKY. STOCKHOLDERS. r. M. M :Uhpe, Jofw-pri Jaiii, k .1. Sunlord, Joseph II Kariisat, A. .1. Alb'rn, A J. MmiDtcastle, V. A- Anderson, S. T. LoUHti. ft. U. Jnokson, W. I". (Jbnuiberlaiu. J T. Boynlon. .1. Y. J.ibrmtori, .1 union j. iaiuew, T Wfbb. W. P. Wnlilmrn, Jobn K. Chnpnmu, Jos. T. Mi-Teer. K. :. Powell, H. Kltmaih. Tin li, WiltiuiiiH, J. B. IloXHie, H. MeClunR. A Carpenter, W. nilruff. CttMwell, li. KoHA, W . Taylor nr. V. FiilkttmoD, W. Palmer, B. Lnttrcll. J . CoDrtoD, linn. H. Brown, Hugh Blurt ui. C. K l,u ky. B. K. KarneHt, K. T. Vi ilnoti. Thou. O'Cotne-, John Q. Karnest, N. BogHTt, II, M. Khea, J. vv . Mllaril, l. t . lilinH. a UK 1 1 7U- IV J. S. MILIK, HBRCn'ANT TAILOR, 3Iorristoa, Teun. First-Class Work, Crraeeitil & Stylish, No Misfits. Havnie adopteil J! nrrlxtown as my future Iiom, 1 solicit the patroiiaee of a 2-neroiM public. With ao experinncuof !8jfearx.I feel af in uaranteeio perlVctatiH-a tion. (ieuttT ami Imyg gurmen ti cut and made equal to anv in the Mate. I.adiea' coat and lialitn ex -uiaitely cut and made. Prices an low an (food work can be done for in thi aection. Country produce taken in exchange fur work. Cleaning and repairing neatly exe.-ntert. All work done with precision. Punctuality a specialty. Ku ropean and American fashions constantly on hand . 1 invite all to call upon me at my shop, nearly op posite Co-iimerciiil Hotel, Slain street. jiillti7U-ly J. S. MILLKR. TONSORIAL. By Mack Fulton, At the Grigiby House, MOKKJSTOWN, TEXNESSKI2. , . , nd would say solicit thejpnblic patroua . clean, neat that 1 c .n give satisfaction either in a . .,,. shave hair cut, hair dress, clean harntoo, ilegaut whisker or mountache dye. terms 11 ou eiate. FOR THE 1 1 1 1 w'5? iilO i Do not fall lo ace joor lirkei rei" by Ib NASHVILLE, CHATTANOOGA & ST. LOUIS R. R. ITIOR speed, safety and comfort, you will find this 1 line to be uurifaled. For tee celebrated ftprings i.nd Summer Keiorts, Bound trip tic kets can be purchased at all principal offices, kmi grants wishing to to vest. eltner to locate or prospectors, will find it to their advantage to go by this route. Kou ..d Trip emigrant ticket on sale to Texas points, through cn hes are run irom Chat tanooga to Columbus withotit change, bleeping Coac hes on all night trains. Good Coaches, Good Road and Quick Time. Leave Chattanooga H " " 2 P Bridgeport VI 1" Pn " P'" Stevenson 12 ' P"' -v' P'" Cowan 1 33 pin II l pm Decherd 1 ' Pf " P"1 Tnllahoma 2 15 pm VI 1 am Wartrace 2 4S pm 1 ! am Mnrfreesboro' 3 42 pm 2 15 am Arrive Nashville " Pi" '"' Leave Na-hville pm am Arrive WcKenxie... 11 10 pm H Martin 3 P1" l uion ity - ?' am fi v ,m Memphin P'" ' 11 m 6t. Louis 5 P'u 16 luu For maps, timetables and all information la re gard to this route, call on or address W. L IMNI.EY, Gen. Tass. and Ticket Agt . Na-hvthe, Xenn. WM. T. KOliKS, Pass Agt.. Cbattauooga Tenn. A. B. WKI.fiNIC. janU'79 tf Trav. Agt., Atlanta, ia. 13. V. C. DAVIS, Watch Maker t'L JJ.WELEB. i Announces to the public that he is now prepared to do all kinds of work in bis line at the most sat isfactory prices. REPAIULNG Clocks, Watches and Jewelry of all kinds attended to with promptnew anil in the very best style A ny article of Jewelry ordered on shot t notice and satis fac.io i guaranteed. "-' T J1ANI100D-II0W LOST HOW RESTORED! JI7ST pub'isVed, a new edition of PR. CL'L VKRVV KLL'H CKLKBit ATKD ESSAY on the radical cur without medicine! of Spermatorrhn-a, Kemlnal Weakness, Invo nntary Heminal Losses, Imrotency, Mental and Physical Incapacity, I ru pedimeuta to Marriage, etc.; also Coosnm ption. Epilepsy and Fits, Induced by self indulgence or sexual extravagance, Ac. , . . The celebrated author, ill this admirable Kssay. clearly demonstrates, Irom a thirty years'succeeiv ful practice, that the alarming coneinence of self abuie may be radically curod without the dan gerous me oi internal medicine o. the application of the knife; pointing ont a mode of cure at once simple, certain ana eft ctual. by moans o. which every nft rer. no matter what his condition may be. may cure himself cheaply, privately, and radi cally. Ths lecture shoald be iu the hajds of every youth and every man ia the lun .. Kent free, tindr seal, in a plain euvelope, to any address. Addsess the piiblisbeis. THE CtJLVEKWtLL MBDIfAL CO. 41 Ann St., hew York; P. O. Bo iS-f,. Junel8'791y GEO. WALKER, FASHIONABLE T0NS0R. MORUISTOWN, TENNESSEE. Having fitted np and opened new Barber Hhop on the railroad, next door to Newman s Heer Kali. I sm prerared to aommo.tatH the public in my line o! bu.iuefS and reeee- tfully solicit . share of their work. M prices will t reasonable, and all work guaranteed to pjease. Keen rajorsand clean towels ul I l a leading feature. A.eomy burea'i at all tim-s will be supplied w'th the best oils and peilumenes thatcan be bad. In fart, I props tJ Umpatch work iu artbtic itjle, but to be convinced come and see mo. jrl3n tf WORTH WEST NEW ADVERTISEMENTS. w. v. wooDRcrr. 1879. W, W, WQODHUFF & DO, WE HAVE DECIDED TO ADD TO OUR KECJITLAI. HARDWARE businefwa line of A HIlK'l'L 7771.1 L IMPlKMLW'TS, aoJ .r. now rrej'rtJ to 'iZjl .Und the f.t of ,.rience M U., tb. VEI?eBhafthe no'oMiUTuce the OLIVER CHILLED FLOW, ami ur. w. have the gratitude of f ,000 Farmers, who are now using them ia tun section. Every article warranted to pive perfect aatinfaction. Circulars and Prices fnt oo application. .... , , Correspondence solicited and all informtirn on Midline tj r,xUhj ven. Send foi Circular and Price to U S WOODKITF & CO., for the folio log implements : WIIEELEK te MELICICS CHAMPION THRESHER M0 CLEANER, 18 INCH CYLINCER, $150 CHAMPION THRESHER AND CLEANER, 22 INCH CYLINDER, $200 The Best a so Lowest Priced Thrkmierh A Ci.eaneeh is anv Market. RAILWAY and LEVER POWERS, CLOVER HULLERS and CLEANERS HORSE RAKES, PULVERIZING WHEEL HARROWS. yiiiJsilf Ay ul yf HOWE SEAVINCJ MVCIIIXIi: OOM'V, 8KN1 Kofi (TUfl'LAIi A N l I'Ull I l.l-T. Brennan & Co. Kentucky Grain Drill This Drill will work io Undi where other drill- will fail. The only Drill that w,l! not choke or clo in FILTHY LAND ; of lei draft than any other ; re-tnrrs tat at msn and two hnrnes. We believe this will work a ereit a revolution io tirain In.. as the Oliver Chilled Plow has among otner Pios. Send for Circulars and Prices lo W. V. WOODKUKF A O Cider Mills, Sinclair Str.iw Cutters. "Wheat lAms, Oliver Chilled Mow, Di)iiLlf '. Shovel Plow, whhI or irwi henui, 3'lMler Cmir Mill, 1-lMh-r Giw Miih, Patent (walmniwd Evnrof-r and pitm Ixiwn Mower, Circular Saw, IMF Fire Pnmf&tfi, JfTOur stock of General Hardware will le kept complete and full, an 1 ill " competition from any quarter. Or.lers hy mail promptly failed. W. W. WOODRUFF 8c CO., XNOXVILLK, TENN. TO WHOLESALE AXD 11ETAIL J U YE US PETER KERW, CONFECTIONER AVI) CANDY MANUFACTURER, WEST SIDE MARKET SQUARE, KSOXVILLR, TEySESSEE Han 11 e largest a id niol vtr'.td slock of Fancy Groceries, Confectioneries, Nuts, Fruits, &c, &c. Ever offered to the Trade aod El l Temw.'r. COUNTRY Throughout this section will find It to thejr InUrest to 7 "'J "?;,'":. '1Kk'Pr for price 1L All good will be soli at HOI TOM I KK I-. FIIIIBII OV8TEI10 A OI3ZJOX-A.3Ls,T-Sr. Order in rersou or y Mail respectfully J. W. GATJT & SON. Wholesale Profliice ail Commission ItaliaM No. 203 Gay Street, Knoxvillo, Tonn. receives Coniifniueati of ill kinds of Tr-nince, end 15uys WJIEA'J, CORX, OATS, RYE, HAY, DACOS. LARP, Fi.OUR. ' DRIED FRUP1, FEATHERS, dc For which the honest market price is paid. When desired, liUral advaure. made on consignments, Charges liberal and satisfaction guaranteed. auglu , My HOPE & Watchmakers COR. GAY AND CLINCH STH., KNOXVILLE, TfcNN., Keep in Stock a full lint of WatctBs an! Jewelry, Solid Silver, Sita-FlaM Ware, Sopiir Table Cutlery, etc. r-KpairingandKoKravingskillful!yeiecuiedBpon reaocab!e terms. All orders y mail will receive prompt attention snd satisfaction guaranteed. aul ,J ly WILL S. DICKSON. .iLttomfcy at Luw, MUKUlTUW N. TENJ. j Will practice in the Courts of Upper Last Tennessee. Prompt and special attention given to collectiona. W.K.U1BBIS8. - tr,, pat rl ink' StorL S a!A, Mill pindiii'i, Frenrh IJo.r Mill n-U'iHd (Juany, (lino Ililtiti'f aod Porlio'j, Itniihlf aod Sin'!'' Sjx'iit (',ii Sh.U.r, lh rir Sh'Hi r and S jiritn . MERCHANTS Mill solicited, and mill bave prompt attention MILLER, and Jewelers, A. H. PETTIliONE, Attorney al J,att', G'scrw.l'e, T'" Wi'.l practice ia t? court l I .fit Judicial Circuit end lit ij xw. l' urt at Knoivil'e. We a!' r v prompt etumion to the collection t f ail a.r; ! rl cU,n:4 as 1 tftt u.