The true northerner. [volume], November 10, 1876, Image 1

About The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920

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VOL. XXII.--NO. 35.
PAW PAW, MICH , FRIDAY, NOVEMBER JO, 1S7G.
WHOLE NO. 1128.
IN A SWINQ.
Etch daisy underne ath your feet
Should count itself thrice happy, sweet
Kach purple trodden clover-Lead
Should thank yon even when 'tis dead.
How bleat is every twisted straud
Of rope, encircled by your hand I
Now up a little ; faster I so !
While through the soft June air yon go,
I witth that I might always stay
Below you, as I am to-day,
Keeping you far above all rare
That other women have to bear ;
And high in air though you might be,
You always must come back to me.
she.)
Dear heart, if June staid all year long,
If twisted ropes were always strong,
If daisy-bloom and clover-head
Were never brown and withered ;
If every robin on the tree
Did not look down and wink at me,
And say : " That creature tries to fly,
Hut knows not how to soar on high ;
If I could bring these things to pass.
Then you should stand upon the grass,
And I above your head would swing.
But life is quite another thing ;
Since one of us on earth must bide,
The other should cot leave hi side,
-Api'leton' Journal,
THE JUDGE'S STOKY.
It was when I first began to practice,
commenced the Judge, lighting a cigar.
I was admitted and opened an office in
the village now city of C , in the
spring of 18G-. I had had but little
business, and the case you have men
tioned proved the key to my future suc
cess. I was sitting in my office, trying
to keep comfortable, the clock already
pointing to 10:30, when the door opened
and the keeper of the county jail en
tered. 41 We have a guest at our house who
is quite anxious to see you, and request
ed me to bring you up to him if you had
not retired."
I gladly put on my coat to accompany
the jailer, for I needed every cent I
could earn just then, and announced
myself ready to start. It was not far to
the jail, and we soon arrived there.
After unlocking the usual number of
iron doors, the jailer admitted mo to tho
Erisoner's cell, and remarked that when
was readv to go he would come and let
me out. The huge door closed with a
clang, the bolt was sprung, and I was
alone with my would-be client.
As I had supposed, as soon as the
jailer was out of hearing the prisoner
came forward. lie was a young, gentlemanly-appearing
fellow, apparently about
24 years of age. Extending his hand
to me he said :
"I am glad to see you, Mr. , you
are indeed kind to come to mo at this
untimely hour, but I wanted to talk to
some ono, and I feel that you will take
an interest in my case. I nave been ar
rested for the murder of Mr. Richards,
the President of the Farmers' Bank, of
K , and for the robbery of the bank.
Will you not lend me your assistance ?"
I assured him that I would do all in
my pswer for him if he desired to re
tain me. lie suddenly interrupted me
by saying :
" Beg your pardon, sir, I do wish to
retain you to defend me in my trial, and
a trial must, of course, take place," say
ing which he handed mo five solid dout le
eagles.
"I have heard but few of tho circum
stances of tho tragedy," he continued,
" as it occurred this very evening, and
I fear that there are some things that
will appear to be against me, but I trust
that you will bring mo out all right. Do
all you can, sir ; employ more counsel,
if necessary, but clear me, for I am in
nocent." I assured him that I had no doubt but
we would clear him, and added :
"Tell me what you know of the case,
and the circumstances that you think
appear against you.''
Well, I had a quarrel with Mr.
Richards last evening, but it did not last
long. I will tell you the whole story,
sir. I am a clerk in tho Farmers' Bank
of K . of which Mr. Richards was
President. I have been employed there
nearly five years, and I think I have at
tended to my duties to the entiro satis
faction of all the officers of the bank,
and have been liked very much by them
all, particularly by the President, who
has invited me to his houso many times.
Now, Mr. Richards, you must under
stand, has a daughter, several years
younger than I am, a lady with whom I
have not only become intimately ac
quainted, but for whom I have con
ceived a strong attachment. Her father
discovered that I was deeply in lovo with
Clara Richards, and saw, I presume,
that sho was not wholly indifferent to
me. Last summer I dined at thtir
house, by invitation of Mr. Richards,
and during the evening I told Clara the
state of my feelings, and was overjoyed
to learn that sho reciprocated my love.
We agreed that I should ask her father's
consent to our marriage as soon as I
should be able to support a wife. You
see I am telling you all," said the pris
oner. That is right," I said; "in fact it
is all-important that you should tell me
all."
" Last evening I called on Mr. Rich
ards, and boldly asked him to consent
to our engagement. He was very angry,
said I was an impudent fellow, declared
I should never again f peak to Clara, and
in short he insulted me, accusing me of
taking advantage of his kindness to in
gratiate myself into the heart of his only
child. Finally, 1, too, got angry, and
can hardly remember now what I said
only I remember I did not threaten him.
At the close of our conversation he left
the room, and I went directly to my
room and to bed. This morning I went
as usual to the bank, and as soon as Mr.
Richards came down he took me into
his private office and said to me that
most men would discharge a clerk from
their employ under similar circum
stances, but as I was honest, capable,
and faithful he would keep me, on con
dition that I would forget my presump
tuous fancy.
Why,' said he, Clara has more
for pin-money than your salary.' And
then, after informing me that I would
no longer bo received at his house, ho
told me to return to my desk. Nothing
unusual occurred during the day until
just before wo closed, when we received
an unusually largo cash deposit. As I
was on the point of leaving the bank
Mr. Richards called me and said :
"Here is a package containing
$9,000, 1 wish you to take to Mr. Martin,
cashier of tho City Bank of C . You
can explain about our vaults not being
any too secure, and apologize for com
ing at such an unreasonable hour, and
ask him as a personal favor to me to re
ceive the funds on deposit. Take a re
ceipt and return in the morning ; you
can take tho G o'clock train this even
ing "I had a little money on deposit at
our bank, and, having a payment due
on my life insurance in C , I threw
$100 and thought I would pay that be
fore I returned. I took the package
containing the $9,000, and, after receiv
ing some money for my expenses, 1
started. I arrived at my destination
about half-past G o'clock, and went di
rectly to Mr. Martin's house, but found
that no had gone up town, and later was
going to the theater. Whereupon I
sought the principal hotel, thinking I
might see him there, but was disap
pointed here and there. I walked
around where I thought I would be
most likely, to meet him, until about
half -past 8, and then returned to the
hotel, took supper, and engaged a
room, to which 1 went. I sat down and
read tho evening paper until half-past
10, when I started for Mr. Martin's
house. As I came down stairs and
opened the door, a burly fellow touched
me on tho shoulder, and whispered :
" I arrest you for the robbery of tho
Farmers' Bank of K , and the mur
der of Mr. Richards.' .
"He then placed tho handcuffs on mo
and escorted me hero. And now I have
told you all I know about my case, and
so help me God it is the truth. My name
is Howard Burton; I have no parents."
This is the substance of what Howard
Burton related to me, on that Christmas
eve, in ms cell in tne jail at u . 1
had not interrupted him during his reci
tal, but had listened attentively to every
word. I was much interested in the
young man, who was about my own age,
and who I felt was innocent of the hor
rible crime with which he was charged.
I remained with him until long after
midnight, and then, charging him to
converse with no one on the subject of
the murder, I left him. I knew noth
ing of the circumstances of the murder
as yet, but the next day, being Christ
mas, I thought I would go to K and
learn what I could, as I knew my client
would not bo examined that day, but
was sure he would next. Justice was
then much swifter than now. On my
arrival at K 1 went directly to the
bank, and found two or three detectives
there, and some of the officers of the
bank. Nothing had been moved except
the body of the murdered man. He was
found lying on the floor with his skull
crushed and his throat cut from ear to
ear. Some of the drawers had been ri
lled, but aside from this there was noth
ing to indicate robbery. There was missing
from the safe nine thousand dollars, but
the locks afforded no evidence of having
been tampered with. I found that be
lief in Burton's guilt was quite general.
I proceeded to look around to see somo
indication of violence being used, but
the locks of the safes and vaults were in
perfect order. There was a window in
the President's office that looked out in
to a narrow passage that divided the
bank building from a lawyer's office. It
was securely guarded by an iron grating,
and I felt that the assassin entered the
bank in the usual manner, namely,
through the door. There was no traco
of tho assassin and robber, as I said, but
I felt that the accused man, my client,
was innocent of the terrible crime of
which he was accused. Tho cashier had
gone to O , and lodged a formal com
plaint against Howard Burton, and the
examination would be held the follow
ing day.
I stood at tho window in tho Pres
ident's office, staring vacantly out, hard
at work thinking; when my eye noticed
on the sash of the window of the law
yer's office just across the passage way
a little scrap of paper with the word
"Paint" written on it. A suggestive
thought flashed through my mind as I
walked out of tho bank and stepped into
the law office next door. I was slightly
acquainted with its occupant, who wel
comed me and invited me to a seat. We
talked of tho frightful occurrence of the
previous night for some time, and at
ength I said, rising to go :
"So you have been painting a little,
Mr. Harris?"
Yes, sir; did you observe my new
sign? Kelley, tho painter, has a young
German working for him who is really
an artist. He did all the work here,
and it is worth almost what he charges
to have Fritz Vogel's presence in the
office. He is a witty, original Dutch
man." "When was tho painting done!" I
asked.
"All dono yesterday bo careful of
your coat."
I bade Mr. Harris good day and left
his office.
I had learned who painted that win
dow, which was just what I most wanted
to learn, without asking a leading ques
tion, or letting Mr. Harris know I was
interested in Mr. Richards' murder any
more than he. I mado up my mind to
see tho German, Vogel, without loss of
time, and find out if he saw Mr. Rich
ards after young Burton left tho bank.
I went to tho paint-shop, but found no
ono at work, all hands keeping Christ
mas. I learned hero Vogel lived, and
was soon in conversation with him.
"You painted Mr. Harris sign and
office, did you not ?" I asked.
"Yes, sir."
"Well, what timo did you finish up
there last night?"
"At 6 o'clock, sir."
" Did you paint after dark?"
"Yes, sir; after dark I painted tho
outside of the window, about half-past
5; the man in the bank lighted the gas,
and it shone so brightly that I finished
the window last evening."
"Did you see this maa in the bank
handle any money?"
The German looked quite puzzled at
this question, but answered.
"les, sir; I noticed him counting
a large pile."
What kind of a looking man was he?"
"Well, a good-looking man ; it was
Mr. Richards. If you don't know him
I will describe him to you."
I answered that I Lad seen him, and
then inquired what he did with the
money.
" He made a bundle of it and handed
it to a young man, telling him to take it
somewhere. I could not hear all he
said. In addition to the bundle, he
gave him what I judge to be a few dol
lars in change, and told him to come
back in the morning. Then the young
man went away. By and by Mr. Rich
ards put out the gas, and then I suspend
ed work and went home."
"Did you see Mr. Richards again?"
" Yes, I saw him in the cigar store as
I passed." t
I concluded my examination of Vogel
with the question.
"Did you know Mr. Richards was
murdered last night, and the money in
the bank stolen ?"
The German turned pale, and ex
claimed with much excitement.
" Murdered 1 no; is it so? You don't
think it was me? My wife Kathrina
knows I came straight home."
"Oh, no," I said, "I don't think it
was you. You must not, however, tell
anyone you have talked to me, or it may
result in your being taken to court.
He promised not to speak of it, and I
left him.
I was now certain of my ability to
clear my client, as I could prove he "was
sent on tlio mia?ion to C . I next
wanted to find some one who had seen
him on the train, but knew not whero to
obtain the information. Every one was
talking of this murder, and publio feel
ing was indeed bitter against Howard
Burton. Stories of his quarrel with Mr.
Richards were circulated with the usual
exaggerations, and it seemed to be the
unanimous opinion that he was tho cold
blooded murderer. Btill I was hopeful,
and returned to G- feeling confident
of my ultimate success. On my arrival
I held an interview with younp Burton,
and told him the result of my visit to
K . He was overjoyed, and ex
pressed himself confident of being ac
quitted. Returning to my office, I
looked up all the reported cases that
bore any resemblance to the one in hand.
The examination of my cliont was set
down for the noxt morning, at which
time I went to the jail and accompanied
him to the court-room, accompanied by
an under-sheriff. We found quite a for
midable array of lawyers of note repre
senting the prosecution. In addition to
the learned District Attorney, there were
two astute criminal lawyers who had
been retained by tho bank officers to as
sist him. The examination was very
brief, and after calling Mr. Richards'
servant, and receiving the testimony of
tho hotel clerk, Howard Burton was
fully committed to answer the charges of
murder and nobbery at tho January
term of court.
" Can you not think of some one you
know who saw you on the train from
K to C on the night of the mur
der ?" said I.
No, sir ; not one that I knew ; but
perhaps the conductor will remember
mo. Ho had to change a $5 bill for my
fare, and grumbled a little about that."
" I will seehim at once," said I, start
ing to go.
"Do so, do so," said tny client, ex
citedly. "Call to his mind the young
man who had a pen over his ear. I re
member that on leaving the bank hur
riedly I neglected to rqmove the pen
which I frequently carry over my car
after tho manner oi clerks."
I went directly to tho depot, and
learned that the conductor I was in
search of would arrive in about an hour.
I waited, all impatience, and upon his
arrival asked him if he would do mo tho
kindness to walk up to the jail and see if
ho could identify Mr. Burton. He will
ingly consented, and, upon arriving at
the prisoner's cell, I introduced him to
my client. The conductor gazed steadily
at young Burton for about a momenr,
and then said:
Mr. Burton, bo kind enough to put
on your hat."
Burton did so, and again he looked at
him very sharply without a change of
countenance.
"Now, sir, please put your hand in
your waistcoat pocket."
I was afraid tho conductor was not go
ing to identify him, but as young Burton
put his hand in his waistcont pocket the
lappel of his coat was drawn back, re
vealing upon his breast a Masonio pin,
tho badge of a Knight Templar.
"I fully identify him as tho man for
whom 1 changed a five-dollar bill on my
train, Which left K at G o'clock on
the evening of Dec. 21, and am readv to
swear it in any court of justice. You
see, sir," continued tho conductor, "we
learn in our business to remember, and
noticing a pen over this young man's
ear, I laughingly advised him to take it
down. But what called my attention
principally to him was tho fact that he
wore a Knight Templar's badge. I
stooped to examine it. You see it is a
very curiously made pin, and he re
marked that he was not strictly entitled
to wear it; it had formerly belonged to
his father, who was dead. I shall be
most happy to give my testimony in
your behalf, Mr. Burton. And now, if
I can got out, I will bid you good eveu
ing, gentlemen." So saying, tho gentle
man ,ithdrew.
I saw that I could prove an alibi, and
thus undoubtedly clear my client ; but
was ambitious to do more. I wanted to
arrest and convict the guilty party. The
next thing for mo to do was to see tho
keeper of the cigar store, at which my
Dutch painter on his way homo had seen
Mr. Richards after G p. m. on the night
of the murder. On the following morn
ing I took tho train for K , and on
my arrival went directly to the cigar
store, and then spoke to the man behind
the counter of the murder.
"Oh I" said he, "poor man, poor
man, he was in my store about an hour
before they found him dead."
"Indeed," said I, " did he trade with
you?"
"Oh, yes, sir; why he came in here,
as I tell you, and bought some cigars
that very night on which ho was killed,
and stopped a moment to chat with me.
Then he looked at his watch, and said :
It is a quarter past G. I must go in
and lock up the bank and go home.'
Just then his man servant came in and
said :
" ' Mr. Richards, I have a note from
Miss Clara for you, sir.'
Well, Thomas,' said he, 'suppose
it is for money ; that usually is the sub
ject of her perfumed notes to me ; come
into the bank a moment.'
"In a little whilo I saw tho servant
going in the direction of Mr. Richards'
house, and in about an hour afterward
his master was discovered in the bank
dead."
This from the cigar-store keeper. I
did not let him know I was attorney for
the accused, and was soon turning my
steps toward the late residence of the
deceased. I was admitted by his late
servant Thomas, and was soon convers
ing with Miss Clara, to whom I confided
my relations with Burton. I asked her
what time she sent Thomas to tho bank
the night her father was murdered.
"I did not send him at all," sho re
plied, evidently surprised at tho ques
tion. "Well," said I, "wo are going to ac
quit Howard Burton, and to take his
place we want to find out who did com
mit the crime. Now, Miss Clara, are
you sure you did not send Thomas to
tho bank the night of tho murder?"
"I know very well I did not," was her
answer.
Then," I replied, either tho keeper
of the cigar store is mistaken, or your
servant Thomas is tho murderer of your
father."
She did not look as much surprised as
I expected at this assertion.
"Mr. G ," said she, "the night
poor papa was murdered, Thomas came
through tho hall and started to go up
stairs. I wanted him to mend the fire
and called him into the sitting-room.
As he entered I noticed a large dark
spot on his cheek, and one on his collar.
I half suspected him when I heard how
anxious he was to tell tho court about
that unfortunate little difficulty between
papa and Howard Burton, but I did not
say anything about it to any one, they
wero ail so sure Howard was guilty."
I told her to treat Thomas as usual,
and not to speak of our conversation to
any one. After receiving a letter she
wished to send to Burton, I took my de
parture for C . Immediately on my
arrival there I went to my client and
communicated to him all I had learned,
and delivered tho letter. The poor fel
low was supremely happy, and invited
me to tea with him in his cell, no ate
heartily, and smoked a cigar with evi
dent enjoyment. I took the first real
night's rest that night I had sinco tho
death of Mr. Ricnnrds. I had previounly
sworn out a warrant for the arrest of
Thomas, to be served as soon as the jury
should pronounce my client not guilty,
Tho District Attorney opened for tne
people in an elaborate and very able
speech, giving tho details of the case,
and then proceeded to examine tho wit
nesses. Thomas, the servant, was first called.
Ho sworo to tho quarrel between Mr.
Richards and Burton, and that ho heard
Burton threaten Mr. Richards' life.
Notwithstanding I closely cross-examined
him, I failed to make him contra
dict himself, and when he retired nearly
every one in tho court-room was doubt
less certain that Howard Burton was
guilty. The next witness was the hotel
clerk, who testified that Burton came in
to the hotel while ho was attending the
guests from tho train that arrived in
C at half-past 6 o'clock. Then fol
lowed the examination of tho bank
cashier, who swore that the package of
$9,000 found on Burton at the timo of
his arrest was depopited in his bank on
tho afternoon of the murder. Aftej
calling several other witnesses, whoso
testimony was of minor import, the
prosecution testa d. I then followed,
and, after a brief opening addrcpn, called
the German painter, who swore to teeing
Mr. Richards send Burton on the er
rand; also to seeing Mr. Richards in the
cigar store after G o'clock on the evening
of the murder. When I had finished
with him he was submitted to a severe
cross-examination, in which he acquit
ted himself very creditably. Then I
called the conductor, who sworo to see
ing Burton on the train on the night of
the murder; he also swore that the train
left on time G o'clock. The cigar-store
man was next examined, who swore to
talking with Mr. Richards at a quarter
East 6, also to seeing him leave for the
ank with Thomas. My witnesses were
all cross-examined thoroughly, but did
not contradict themselves in any particu
lar. I then closed my case, and, after a
few remarks from the prosecution, the
Judge charged the jury, who retired,
and in fifteen minutes returned with a
verdict of not guilty. My client and I
were overpowered with congratulations,
and never sinco in my professional life
have I felt as proud and triumphant as
I did then.
As soon as quiet was restored, the
Sheriff approached Thomas, the servant,
and said in a loud voice, "Thomas
nealey, I arrest you for the murder of
Mr. Richards." The excitement in the
court caused by this unlooked-for and
sudden proceeding was most intense.
The prisoner was immediately taken to
jail, followed by a crowd that were
loud in their expressions of denuncia
tion tho same crowd that a litUo be
fore Lad marked Burton as the mur
derer. Well, to finish the story, I have little
to add. I was retained by the bank
officers to prosecute Thomas Healey,
and he was convicted of the crime. He
)rotested his innocence almost to the
ast, but the night before he was exe
cuted he made a full confession, stating
that he had determined to rob the bank
some evening when Mr. Richards was
there alone. It was Mr. Richards' cus
tom, he explained, to go to the bank in
the evening, and when he and young
Burton quarreled, ho, Thomas, saw his
opportunity. His determination was
strengthened by hearing Mr. Richards
remark on the day of the murder, as he
sat at dinner, that there was an unusual
ly large amount of cash on hand. Tne
note in the case was one that Miss Clara
had given him to take to her father
some days before, but, Mr. Richards
coming home before Tnomas found him,
it had not been delivered as intended.
By tho aid of this note he had got Mr.
Richards in the bank, and while he was
reading it ho struck him with a large
poker, and then cut his throat. He got
no money as the reward of his crime, as
the vaults had been locked.
Tho night Thomas made his confes
sion ho committed suicide, thus cheat
ing the gallows-tree of its just due.
Howard Burton was made cashier of
the bank, and married Clara Richards
within a year, and they are both still
living.
It Didn't Suit.
Two or three weeks ago a Detroit boy,
after finishing the last chapter of u book
called " The Pleasures of the Deep,"
pleaded with his father to let him ship
aboard a lake schooner. The old man
smiled a grim smile, took tlrs case under
consideration, aud in a few days tho boy
was on tho rolling deep, having shipped
as a greenhorn on a vessel in the lumber
trade. no sailed to Saginaw, came
down and crossed to Toledo, and next
day he appeared in Detroit, lamo and
stiff, his throat sore, one eye nearly shut,
and a feeling of humbleness running all
through him.
"What I back again?" cried the old
man, as tho boy entered the house.
" Yes, father, I want to saw all tho
wood for winter, bring in all tho coal,
clean out the cellar and paint the barn,
and you needn't give me but two meals
a day."
Don't you like sailing ?"
" Father, you don't begin to realize
anything about it. Tho Captain sailed
right along on Sunday, tho samo as any
other day, and I believe he swore even
harder. He wouUn't give mo an um
brella when it rained, ho made mo sit up
most all night, and two or threo times
he called mo up at midnight and mado
mo haul on ropes ond drag old sails
around. There wasn't a single night
when all of us got off to bed at 9 o'clock,
and there wasn't a day Miat he didn't
boss us around and break in on us every
time wo got to reading anything good I
I like land, father, and I wish you owned
a farm 1" Free Press.
A Miser Starves Himself to Death.
Dr. Thomas J. Manahan died in
Brown's Hotel on Wednesday evening,
of general debility, superinduced by
starvation. About one year ago Mana
han was admitted to the Church Home
as a pauper, his clothing being torn and
so filthy that it haJ to be taken from
him. The dirty cioihing was precious
to Manahan. Iu the lining of the vest
were packages of money, which wero
handod to tho supposed pauper, who,
instead of a grateful acknowledgment,
charged tho employe of the institution
who delivered him tho money with hav
: i i . i
uj iuuwu xiiui ui u Hum vuicu lie saiu
was missing from ono of the packages.
The money was found. It was after
ward discovered that Manahan owed
large sums of money to boarding-house
keepers, it being his custom to remain
at one a short time, and leave without
paying his bills. Recently Manahan
made Brown's Hotel, in North High
street, his home, but had denied him
self nourishment. Dr. Houck, who was
called after the miser had breathed his
last, gave it as his opinion that Mana
han had been suffering from general
debility. Tho sum of $2,000.25 was
found among tho miser's effect. Bal
timore American.
TnK Danbury Ncics man has made, in
Boston, his first npiear8nee as a lectur
er. The reporters say that bis descrip
tion of travel in England was hnmorous,
but did not cause uproarious laughter.
A point was made by asking who " ever
thought of a one-legged Duke or a cross
eyod DuchopB, or a Biron with a wen on
the top of his head? No one ; yet he
t..i ur frmrnl them to be luat as
other people were, and fully as moan. J
Pith ana Point.
Cora Cheesman committed suicide is.
New York because her husband refused
to use condensed milk.
The Rev. Mr. Talmage remarks as an
impressive fact that Peter, though suf
fering so many trials, was a very cheer
ful man. It should be remembered,
however, that Peter's wife's mother lay
sick of a fever.
Important correction in Elizabeth
town (Ky.) News: "The young lady
who proposed to rido bareback around
the amphitheater at the Glasgow fair for
a new bonnet assures us she meant that
the horse should be bareback, and not
herself."
Men learn with different degrees cf
celerity, but it doesn't take longer than
a week to convince any man who has
lived in a New York lodging-house that
he is past being frightened by storie
of hardship at sea or on the plains.
Brooklyn Argus,
A negro, being asked what he was in.
jail for, said it was for borrowing money.
" But," said the questioner, "they don't
put people in jail for borrowing money.'"
"Yes," said the darkey, "but I had to
knock the man down free or fo' time
before he would lend it to me."
A Chinaman of 40 years, whoso agetl
mother flogged him every day, shed
tears in the company of one of hie
friends. "Why do you weep?" wa
asked. "Alas! things are not as they
used to bo I" answered the devoted son.
"The poor woman's arm grows feebler
every day 1"
Jones is suing for a divorce from hi
wife, who has deceived him. He could
not help, after discovering her guilt,
rating her soundly. "The idea," she
said,. bursting into tears, "the idea o
treating mo so brutally, when I had
given myself so much trouble to keep
you from knowing anything of it, so a
not to worry you I And this is tha
thanks I get!"
A New York letter-writer announce
tho presence of Malaria in Philadelphia.
Possible? And what is she going to
sing? llawk-IJyc. You remind us of
the woman who, when sho was told that
some tables in tho Russian department
were made of malachite, exclaimed :
"My goodness 1 I thought Malachita
was one of tho prophets 1" Philadel
phia Bulletin.
What is that man yelling at?" asked
an Illinois farmer of his boy, as ha
pointed to a person in the field one day
this week. "What is he yelling at?"
repoated the lad. "Yes," replied tha
father, inquiringly. I know, said tha
boy. "Then what is it, you young ras
cal?" demanded the paternal. "Why,
chuckled the urchin, he's he's yelling
at at tho top of his voice 1" Then that
cold-blooded husbandman placed violent
hands on his irreverent offspring and
laid him over a gang-plow while ha
flailed him.
The following "poem" was written
by a farmer on the occasion of a visit by
the Lord Bishop to a country parish,
and was actually sung by the choir :
Why skip ye bo, ye little hU?B,
And wherefore do ye hop?
Ii it because ye do expect
To nee the Lord Bitth-op ?
Why hop ye bo, ye little bills,
Aud wherefore do ye skip?
Is It because ye do expect
To see the Lord Bitth-lp ?
Why hop ye so, ye little hills,
And.why do ye jump tip ?
Ib it because ye long to see
His Grace the Lord Bisb-up ?
Why Jump ye bo, ye little hills,
And wherefore do ye leap ?
Is it because ye eager are
To see the Lord Bish-eep 7
Tnn New York Herald presents the
following bill of fare for tho medical
profession :
SOUP.
Fiendishly concocted by a gruel monster.
risiT.
" The lamp, pray, till I count these drops.
ENTRIES AND SORTIIS.
AH hours of the night.
VEGETABLE.
Homeopathic peas. Cabbage heads.
Lettuce see your tongne. Pulse.
ROAST.
Broken ribs.
RAOOUT.
Bills of lame ducks,
men.
Ague apples (well shaken).
TEA.
Bono-set.
Horrible Atrocities in China.
Tho North China Daily News says :
" We have news of further persecution
of tho most savage character in Szechnen.
On the 18th of July, in tho town cf
Yuen-hin-cliang, in the district of Lcui
kimg, placards hostile to Christians and
Europeans were posted in various place
in the market About 9 o'clock on the
morning of tho 20th a line of four or
five thousand armod men drew round
the market to prevent Christians from
escaping. They manufactured a large
wooden cross, ana tiea on ii successive
ly all tho Christians they could catch,
and then cut them to pieces. Among
the victims were two heathen, of whom
one was the father of a convert, and tha
other a young girl of 15, whose brother
was a Christian. Like the others, she
was stripped of her clothes and cut to
pieces. The number of persons killed
was eight. The wounded are very na
merous. It is unnecessary to add that
the houses of the Christians were pil
laged and destroyod. About thirty
other persons are missing. On the 22a
the brutes went to the market of Pel-mow-chen,
where they murdered four
more Christians, but of this butchery we
have no details. It is said that the
principal chiefs of this band of assapsinji
are emissaries from Kiang-peh, where
the persecution first broke out, who are
traversing tho province in full sicht aiKl
knowledge of the Mandarins, to excite
troubles against the Christians and drive
out Europeans, and thus check any in
clination on the part of foreigners t
extend their trado with the interior c
China."