The weekly Caucasian. [volume], July 19, 1873, Image 1

About The weekly Caucasian. [volume] (Lexington, Lafayette County, Mo.) 1866-1875

Image provided by: State Historical Society of Missouri; Columbia, MO

                
WEEKLY
Caucasian
THE
fm
Vol. 8.
Lexington, Lafayette County, Mo., Saturday, July 19, 187.3.
No. 13. Whole No. 377.
Attara js at Lit
JAMES H. McHATTON,
TTtRNRY AT LAW, IxlnKt.w. Mn., will
t V attend promptly l btmnwtia cwnrtilett to htm
ia l.arytt eoimtf . Nirial attmttioa Riven to
llro4infi. Ontm in buihling ot Saving' Hank,
opponiM Umift-hiwi . ffl-J
WllUtM VUJtll. KH1IAKD FIELD.
WALKER A. FIELD,
ATTRJKYSBl Law, l-eir.to, M
Kwiiw'i uuil.llng. ng,vlr
W. 1) . T. ?. WOOD,
ATToa!ttS ATLAW. IJ-T. C. Wood No
tar? Public. Ulam, a itdur c at Aull
l-avtnir Hank. ftl try
joun r. Ti.r. joiih a. btlahd.
Kf LIKD Av SOX,
ATTORNKYX ANl COUHSK1.I.ORS AT
UW, Leilaa-taa, Mo. orboe. No. W Mam
t., over the .tore ot Kneborg A Jennings.
I'rx-tlr la kll lite courta of tnia and adjaoen
romum, and In Um Supreme tlourt of Uie .stale,
IMatrlotConriof taa United Mate, Uolleo
tiona null). iiiA ly
J. 8. BLACHWELIi,
A TTORNKT AT LAW AND NOTARY PUB
V LiC, Wellington, Mimoarl, will practice
In all Uie eonrta, and giva prompt attention to
rolfcnr-iloiM. - CM
WBO. BATHUU. ALBX. UHAVB3.
RATHUU5 tk GRAVES,
ATTOKNKYS AT LAW, Islington, ' Mo.
Will pranlina in all Um eourU ol the SiU
JallRlal irrml, ltalrlt an. I U. H. Oourta.
frump atvmuoa givaa la ewlleelMma. tnUos:
Mali lmt, mc Krwlm'a noe alorw. ilellyl
RICHARD A. fOlUSS,
ATTOKNEY AT LAW, Waverly, Mo, Will
pearua but pruluwam in ali ih eourtu ni
I4w 6tW T SiiauSui. vwlfli;M mailt
thron1"" the BliMea.
T1I.TOX DAVIS,
ATTOKNEY AT LAW, Lexington. Mo. K
necial attention given lu the collection ol
lt. lnvetigtio ami IVrtVelion o Laixt Ti
tles, and to Criminal and Ileal lUtate Litiga
tion generally. In Ls.iaye.tta and dj-iuiiig
eviluliee. Otll.'o at &aw--i'a old aland, cor
ner of Main and Itroadway .ueett. julyllttui
A. F. ALBXAHDBH. wi. u. cniLBS.
ALEXANDER & ClilI.E!.
ATTOKNKYS AT LAW. Will practice in
the Courts of Lafayette and a.ljoining
rounliea. W iM also attend promptly to the
Killr. lion el Uhtiiuit, and to eauva arising iiii
uer the Bankrupt law. Olllce ovrr tUe ni-w
liankniK llouneof Wm. Morrison Jt Co. o-.JIy
Medical.
DR. PETER TE-TirLE.
HOMEOPATHIC PHYSICIAN.
AT HIS OLM STASD,
Cedar Street, near Franklin,
jfteS LKXISOrON. MO
fi. W. DARKER, 91. D.,
Practical Homeopathic Physician,
HAVINU aouKlit Ix Hilton as a permanent
location, alU-r twenty years and more -Iterienoe
in the Homeopainio iira-.lice, and
trealinent of acute and cUrooic diseases, ami
bavuiK lormrr yearn, been larorably known
in Uilaoity and vicinity aa a HolueopaUiic pny
aiciau, and latterly aseoeiated ber lor two
With another phyilciao of tlie .amo practioe,
would renpectliilly offer his proiessioual ser
iim, and solicit a eonunuance ol the patron
age ot taeuiliJcus ol l-einiKloii ami snrround
iiix country. pet'.ial attention giveo to the
treatment or all eurahle chroma diseasvs.
Urlica rooms on Brst B.ior of Bouiintn Hotel,
Main alieet. M. B. IVraons indihted to Uie
urui of Temple A llarker tileuse call at Dr. lUr
ker'n office (aa above) aodsettle. junvl
r. j. vv. ntv'i,
SUKOEON DENTIST.
OrPICK, oppoaite the Coiirthonse, tin stairs
leainictou. Mo. All work done in a se.i
auiillit niAiiuer. s4Hi4yi
Heinous knowing themselves indebted to uie
Will please make prompt payment.
DENTIST.
J. F. HASSELL, D. D. S.,
Ufflee over Lintrick'n Bank,
LKXINUTON, MISSUUKI.
DK9. HMALIi, t'HAMBEKS A. CO.
A. V. Smaxx, M. D. .1. B. Albxabdbb, M. It.
. W. YOUNO, M. U. P. II. CIIAMI.BUS, M. l.
Orrr.lt their Htfun the praUie of Medi
cine aud Surgerv, to the puldic, with the
Bope that their association together will tetiii
Kreatly to promote their knowledge ol diseases,
aud to improve their skill in trealiug them.
They will give special atteution to chronic
Disorders. 1'liey will, in all eases, consider
toeir fees due when the service are rendered,
and will collect aa sown thereafter as Uiey may
deem advualde.
rjf-AII iierwns indehtetl to the late firm ol
Drs. .Small A Chambers, or to auy member ol
the alove una are resiiectfully invited, and ear
nestly uwi to settle iinmeilialely. jcllyl
UHive over BolelerA i;iagetts etore
DR. T. 8. SMITH,
PHYSICIAN and Surgeon. Ottioe and resi
dence ou Maiu street, east ol the Courthouse.
Mpecial attention given to surgery. Calls
promptly attended to, in lawn and country. 110A
llotrls, Etc.
LOKU'li HOTEL.
rtlHH Hotel sitltatnd on pine street,
X north ol Mai ii, has chugel bsuils,
aud baa been eleaued, retttted and re
furnished. 'I he fare is as icood aa any
in the citv ami the rooms large and airy . 1 r..v
elers will be handsomely aud eoiiifortaMy
entertained. Call over and aee for yourself, and
you will call again.
mlriHy WM. 1.0SIS, Proprietor.
I ll MOIiTiBltOW XSII1.LK, NO.,
riUIS house la entirely new, and is being fur
I ttitUefl m iriMHi stvls. The proprietor as-
sure the publie. that no pains Will be spared to
promote the coiuloria 01 tuose wuo may lavui
Eim with a call.
M.p7uui W. P. WALTttN, Proprietor.
PACIFIC HOUSE,
lrlOBERI.V, WO.
II. ROBERTSON - - - Proprietor.
w,
rnWO blocks went of Depot. Newly fiirnish
1 el and neatly tilted up. 'ine liar aud I - I -
!! hard Hall attached.
ociliyl
T hyuiewic noAimnu iii i:
I WILL aceoiiiiiKMlaU) a few hoanler
with hygienio fare. Those who are
ehronicallv ailing are esiecially Invi
ted. with a view to their restoration to.
health. Would be glad if encouragement be
given to me, so that I could combine the
psycho system with lh hygienic system,
febla-iiut JOllN K. JORDAN.
NEVT FIRM.
r. itLLnr.
WM. (itJARB,
T. J. iSANDON.
WM. Z. UIT(1ILL,
. HAI.IjARD, HITl'llELL, 6t i'O.,
CAUPENTEIIS & BUILDEIIS,
I TAVINU formefl a ro-pnrtnerlii(r,ar
11 now prfcrt.i ut io atl rr--n-itutr'i
ni j-iiuwr'B wurk. or oilier
work m tlieir line. at Uie IowmL iotlli'
flKiirfa. iieing etteCb irivt.cHl iyAriiiUrs, hii1
iti ploy inx no aHaiHUuittf , they fluliirr Uit'iusx-lvt-s
thttl tiity can 'to oy job in thir hue at lower
liKMnn Ui bin Uie name qiiiility of work etui be
bkul lor in the city. Our motto i "Live n'i
let live." tthop on MAiu-CrtiH ateet, near
Kpitsal churcti. 'VJ call. jue7yl
L.A.bHowv, W . W . fc A II Kit. I Jas.IM'obtkk,
U EN Kit A L UKAI, KSTATR. INSUKANCK A
MOBEKLV, MO
A IX biialnnw entruUeil to their cure will re
ceive iiroinpt fttu-nlioti. Uilice, corner
Keetl apt I 1
w llll
1 1 am 9 ntre4t.
UAVIOMOIV a U AVIS,
Mahuraeturers of
O I O- A lt W,
ti lEiLEits n tmm am siokisg tobacco,
No. 405 Ielaware Street,
KANSAS CITY, MISSOUKI.
I jana-ly ' ' '
M. HOI'I'NAN,
SlTiroLKiiALIC Dealer in Dome.Ucwand for
f eign
WINKS AND LIQUORS,
ill IMaware street, between Ueeond A Third,
.KA VKNWOKI11, K.I. Orders from the coun
try auliaitod and promptly auMiteo to au-ityl
1 CHEAP CASH STORE. .
T. u. ciJAii?7rr,
Wholesale and Retail Dealer in
!jUKENSWARK,
ULAS8WARR,
STONKWAKK,
WILLOW-WARE,
TAHLK-WAKK, . .
A KINK CUTLERY,
..-,, ' , I!
ttlbe old Mnnd ol Oeorgn 8. MeflrewACo.,
.,.iu the Court House, one door east ol
Z,,Vie A Mew's No. M. 1 shall be pleased l
a alt niy fr lends. novHyl
TJEXtlVlS CASH.
tt i t liui, . t
PWfflTION BITTfiM
S. T.-1860-X.
Thia wonderful vegotablo restora
tive ia the sheet-anchor of the
feeble and debilitated.. As a tonio
and cordial for the agod and languid
it baa no eqnal among stomachics.
Aa a remedy for the nervous weak
ness to which women are especially
subject, it ia superseding ovory other
stimulant. In all climates, tropical,
temperate or frigid, it acts as a spo
cifio in every species of disorder
which undermines tlio bodily
otrrfn-rth arid bfeafts down"fhtf'anf-'!
mal spirits. jan27 ly
Mexican Mustang Liniment.
FOR MAX ASD BEAST.
rrnbahlv few articles have ever had so ex
tensive a sale, while none have been nior uni
versally lieneficial than the celebrated MKM-
CAN MUSTAMi LIN1MKNT. Uiildrvn, Adults,
ll.irt.es, and Domestic Ahiinais, are always
lialilelo accideut, and it is safe to say, that no
family cun pass a single season without some
kind ol an emollient Wing necessary. It be
comes a matter of Importance then to secure the
best. . .
Over three hundred livery staideflin tne city oi
New York atone are using the MK.vlvAN
lt;sTANU LINIMKNT.in all ol wuicu it gives
unusiiul satiHlaction.
CAl' TloN The genuine IB wrapneti in a line
SU-el Plate engraving wilh "O. w. V estbrook,
tllemisl," and -Trade Mark, MKXll AN MUS-
1AM, I.1MMKN1," engraven across me isce
of each wrapper. Tlie whole bears the proprie
tor s private cuitinl states llevenue ntaiup, auu
not a common stamp, as used by druggists.
IjYON M AStU e A1TTI' ki SO t-.O.,
or.l'J Ml'arlt l'lace, N. T.
Beautiful Woman !
M Ali NOLI A BALM sites to I be Com
plrilua I he PresBaesa r Voatb.
HAIUS'S Magnolia Balm overcomes Ihe
flushed apiieai-ance caused by beat, fatigue
aud excitement. It makes lite ladv of lorty ap-
(tear but twenty, and so natural and perfect
that no ierson cau detect its application. By
Its use the roughest skill is niude to rival the
pure, radiant tenure of youthful beauty. It re
moves redness, blotches and pimples, it con
tains nothing that will injure the skin in the
least.
Magnolia Balm is used by atl fashionable la
dies in New York, Ixmilon and 1'aris. It costs
only 75 ceuts per bottle, ami is sold by all
druggists au.l perfumers. sp's
C. ii. I.UDWIUS.
WATCHMAKER AND JEWELER;
LEXISUTON. MO. -
Agent for the new improved Sewing Machine
"VICTOR"
the best in the market, Lock stitch alike on both
sides, straight seli-sctling ueedle, uo noise.
Dl.Sig'u ol the Uolden .Spectacles. J
AkBit in iliAA and Silver Watches,
Jewelry, Clocks,
Wall Paper,
Silver and Plated Ware,
I'ebble Sin'Ctaclea,
Musical luatrumeiitB,
I'icture l! rallies and Mouldings,
. Cutlery, PHtols,
fancy Uoods, Toys.
Grover A Baker, and olber Sewing Machines
repaired and needles for all leading machines
constantly on band.
t J Watches, i:loclts. Jewelry aud Sewing
Machines carefully repaired aud warranted.
aim tf C.U. LL'DWIUS.
ii. A. KRIEHX,
DEALER IH J-
HATS AND CAPS,
BOOTS AND SHOES.
Wo. 11 Main Street
A LI. the latest styles in
t. great variety, as cheap
as tlie cheapest. Refers fo
any of his old customers as to
the quality of goods sold and
maimer ol dealing. Call and
examine stock incliMy
ltlOUDV, M It'll EE &, to.j
WlilerSitlo IesiliK
' IN
STAlrK ANI FANCY
CJ ROCEU I K S .
Sob. .Kll , 303 A .TII5 Second street, corner Olive,
ST. LOUIS,
m.: lv
MO.
CASH I CASH I CASH Z
I WILL pay the highest market price in CASH
for WOOL,
HIDES, ' i - :
PELTS,
BEESWAX,
FEATHERS, Ac. '
Kurilicrs of Lafayette and Ray counties, don't
take trade for the above articles. Come to me
audgettheCA.Sll.' 1 can be found at my old
slun.I. lour doors west of the iiostotlice.
1 keep lor sale, cheap for cash, all kinds of
WINES AND LlyUOIW.
L.JTEINKIM AN
1'OR RENT. 7;
rivllE undersigned offers for rent two
1 MM KK.S,three RO (MS and a large
SIAIU.K and yard, with a cisteru.
Apply at once.
Jmi!2l". M. E. SUM MK It-..
UKNar AMTBOHT. ; ; . rilANCIS Kl'HH.
A!VTHO.Y At HIIII,8
is ii: av e it. y,
SIDNEY A BUKL STS., ST. LOUIS.
Manufacturers of Beer and Lairer Beei-i '- Or.
ders for half barrels aud keirs promptly ami
carefully attended to. sepilyl.
THOS. C. REEDSOE,
REAL ESTATE A UK NT office 47 Main-st.,
Ix iiiuton, Mo .. up stairs, over Posuirnce.
niarltf-v '
A. VvTTlluTFHIflS.
REAL ESTATE AND INSURANCE AI1ENT.
onion northwest corner Mam and Laurel
0 Vti1;? "u,n Mo- Represent) the'rtMd
Re .ab e-' Charter Oak Life ln.nrai.ne tympany
01 llarUurd, Oiuneclie.ut. Attention is called
U tlie new ieature of 'e,M,.it Insurance "
Also Uie Agricultural lusurance tnnpauy or
Walertown. New York, which insures onlv
private residences, furm Imihlina
against loss or damage by lire or liKhininn.
Hates favorable. junell
IK FAICflt I'UK MAKE.
HAVIW- lKrilKlk TO C'HANGK MY BUrtl
neart, 1 now o r lor aie, ontHU ly, one of
Ue fluent fitiui! n Iafnyetle county, lyinte om
the arretmbuitf road. Uirre iuile oulbeM ol
iexiugtou. t -
( orUIbId ID7 Acres f Choice Land.
Tim farm la finely Improved, well' Watered,
and has a goo.) orchard ou it; well proxii tloned
with woodland, pasture, meadow, and cultivat
ing lands. o further particulars call aud et
aiuiue tlie pr uiiaes, or address
!
MRS. E, A. CROMWELL, J
' ' ' Iexington. Mo.'
P. 9. Tl e advantagea of this farm are too
numerous m mention. Call aud examine,
aug IJ-I if--
i rOR SALE.
A' BRICK HOUSE an Mais street. The
property is in thorough repair. Tt-
tl UlMllrtl.llt.i Wlllla..l.i 1..
Muir. of W. li.MU3UROVK.or atCau-
14
".argent Eocal and a enrral
C'lrculaOon, tendinR over
all the (Mates and
Territurit-s,
(loitut to a Jrrwer Mt-ther of ttlnffirrm
that w olltrr Fuirr i IKmiimH.
Hy DONAN & ALTKN.
S. AI.IjKN Bi'sinkss Manacikr
CODE."
Home of its Criminal Absurd
ties. U.i
A Sbould-be Historio Reply to a
Challenge.
The ideal and the real, the roman
tio and the sternly-prosily practical,
have met. Now and Long-ago have
embraced each other. Spectral
Hnn i t jintl Sanoa Panama,
with lances at rest, are galloping on
fiorco, phantom jassacks, all over this
land of patent churns, self-rocking
cradles, steam-threshors and multi
farious humbugs. Tlio clank and
clatter of niiddlo-ago armor and
spurs, mingle wilu tho whirr and
roar and clash of modern machiu-
ery. A no uucasy gbosts oi ancient
chivalry, besprent with the dust of
jousts and tourneys and glittering
tomfooleries, five conturies agone,
go stalking, grandly, gloomily and
peculiarly, amid the tract-peddling
wooden-nutmeg 3-ankeos and voudoo
niggers of to-day. Tale spirits of
mighty cavaliers, in coats of mail on
which have gathered tho rust and
mould of twenty generations, wan
der, creaking and rattling as if all
the mummies, skeletons and wax
figures of some mammoth museum
of antique anatomy had simultane
ously forsaken their glass cases and
pegs on llie wall, among the junk
shops and huckster-stalls of puritu
nigger patriotism aud honor a "pa
ttiotism"whicb,like phosphorescent!
rotten maokerel,shines ever brightest
as it stinks the loudest an "honor,"
purchasable as peanuts, and whose
deadliest breach is readily healed
with h h in pi aster poultice. Oeur
de Lion, Godfre', Charles of Na
varre, Black Douglas and The Cid,
sheeted and ghastly, with hearse-
piames ot a thousand years ago
waving on their shadowy helms,
elbow their way amid pickpocket
city councils and 'railroad boards,
pirate congresses and buck-gorilla
legislatures; and, through parch
ment lips, prate of stainless escutch
eons, aud a heroic purity which
gladly rushes on a my raid deaths
rather than bear one shade of shame
or breathing of reproach, to our
Jay Goulds, Beast Butlers, Leper
Mortons, leeherous Beechers, and
besotted, tan-yard Tumblebug Grants!
The green and slimy grave-worm
calls his mate to the banquet-hall,
where lies the decaying body of gal
Uut young Mordecai ; and the jailor
mounts guard over the felon's cell
which holds McCarty. The little
children of Cooley wring their hands,
aud wail for their dead father's re
turn ; and iiboLt iioes forth with
the brand of .Cain upon his brow
New York donkeys, with dreadful
paraphernalia of slaughter, go over
into Canada ana tire blank car
tridges at each other, in the vain
hope that idiotic constables will
rush ' wildly to the rescue, and ren
dor the scene worthy of a place on
the immortality-bestowing pages of
the Police Gazette or Day's Doings
Amos Groon and John W. Heed, ol
Kansas Citv, for wooks, slathor
each other with whole steam fire
engine torrents of putrid billings
gate, and lingual cess - pool filth
enough to supply all Jackson
county with Asiatic cholera of the
green-scummiost type ; and then re
pair, with mountain how-to-hil-sirs,
double-barreled bowie-knives, two
edged shot-guns, Colt's horse-pistols,
ammunition - wagons, ambulances
surgeons, bales of lint and demijohns
of lemonade,to the field of gory glory;
and die like $3 bull calves before the
buteher's triumphant hand Green,
shot through the brain and instantly
dofuncted, by a six-ounce bullet
wadded with county -bonds, that
struck just below his upper coat-tail
button Koed, mortally wounded by a
half-pint slugof Lahlemand's Specific,
which penetrated his heart about
three iuclies west by southwest of his
pocket-book. , Little, pigmy, back
woods snoot-rags, priuted with smut
aud turpentine, descant in columns of
misspelled 'and - grammarless elo
quence,upon the courtesies' due from
one ex-blacksmith, scullion or horse
boy ; to another ; , the privileges of
green-grocer dignity; the lordly rights
of broadcloth-disguised slubberdegul
lions, in the dirty creases of whose ill
shaped pawsitill linger the memorials
of their gutter-snipe or pot-book ori
gin; the 8atisfaction,which every high
spirited clock-tiuker must infallibly
accord, wheuever a noble boot-black
or lick-skillet desires it; et id omne
asioinie twaddle. Murder becomes
a polite accomplishment. Marks
manship is tl.e test of gen tility. The
best, shot with , a sword-cane or
blunderbuss is the most thorough and
reproacbless social exemplar. Trav
is or Bogardas wears the mantle of
our Chevalier Bayard. Any black
leg, pimp or thief may prove himself
a true and spotless knight by "driv-
I JBBB.
ing center" nine time out of ten.
No man can be a gentleman who is
not ad assassin or a corpse. Bah 1
Out with such damnable stuff, or re
vive all tbe otber iniquities and wild
absurdities of the Feudal days; tbe
rack, tbe stake, the trials by oombat,
the witch burnings, the crazy cru
sadoa I Tbe taking of human life ia
tho last, dread, terrible rosert of
either nations or individuals. Doinc
it for any trivial cause, should be
punished by hanging, prompt aud in
evitable 1
Thou shalt not kill. Exodus xx:13.
Wliogo slieddelh runn'i blood, bv man
linU his blood be shed: for in the Image
of Uod made lie man. Geuesis lx:6.
For all thov tli.it take the sword ahull
perish by the sword. Matthew xxvi:52.
lie that killeth with tlie sword must
tie killed with the sword. Itevelation xiii;
10.
Tho famous Bob. Wickliffo.of Ken
tucky, was once challenged to fight a
duel, llo replied with crushing
promptness and brevity : "Sir, your
challongo ia before me; and, as I am
suffering from a severe attack of di
arrhea it will soon be behind mo I"
That duel never came off; and to tell
that tough little six-line incident, all
this oolumn has been writton.
JEFFERSON DAVIS TO THE FRONT.
The survivors of tho First Missis
sippi liifles propose to send Col. Jef
ferson Davis, as their representative
in the national convention of Mex
ican war veterans, to be held in
Washington, next January. This
geutleman is somewhat generally
known, in Lafayette aud othor coun
ties, as the President of the last
American Uepublic head of that pa
triot-hero host, w Inch made the last
grand struggle for "free govern
ment," the new world shall ever see.
If Freedom tthrieked when Kosciusko
fell (and we have high authority
for averring that she did) she ought
to have just set back on her bustle
and liow led ; torn the last bair out of
her sandy wig : rent her streaked
duds into hospital bandages for old
sores on the body-politic; gnashed
her false teeth ; and wound-up by
flopping-over, giving up her mulatto
ghost, leaviug 15 scouts to a Beecher-
ian sin-agogue or a nigger orphan
aeyltim, aud being buried in a pan
per's grave, at the expense of the
dear people ; when Jeff. Davis ker
flununixed, and was crucified on his
own "Starry Cross !" Let him come
to the front! Good for the Missip-
pissi ivifles ! Hurrah for their Col
onel and tbe principles he represents!
JUSTICE.
The Mexican war "vets," at their
meeting in liicbmond, on the 1-4 of
July, called for a convention of tbis
congressional district, at some con
venient time and place, to be select
ed by the various county commit
tees. Col. A. W. Doniphan, W.
M. Jacobs and C. B. Kavanaugh
were appointed a committee of seven
to arrange"it, and they desire to hear
immediately from their brethren in
all the ether counties. This move
ment is daily growing in strength
all over the wide dis-Union ; and it
should succeed. We pension the
nigger-freeing hirelings of Abraham-
us Africanus, for their services in
inaugurating hell and carpet-bag-
gery, baboon-supremacy, tumblebug
despotism and uuiversal thievery, in
our Republic; Why do we, why
should we, deny all recognition of
the claims of thoso gallant men,
whose dauntless heroism, whisky,
sweat and blood, plantod the streaky
banner of yankccdoodlo on the halls
of the Montezuma?, and gave us a
third of all our mighty western pos
sossions ? If Sheridan's barn-burners
and Sherman's vandal bummers
are entitled to pecuniary remem
brance at tho hands of our ge-hell-
orious government, far, far more
are the heroes, who followed the
standards of Price and Doniphan,
Shields, Taylor and Worth, amid the
hot sands and stickory prickly-pears
of Mexico who swept tbe battle
ments of Palo Alto and Cherubusno;
stormed the heights of Cerro Gordo
and Saltillo; and, under Jotf. J:tvin,
saved the day at Buona' Vista.
BEDLAM.
Just think of it. In tbe single
year of 1872, no less than 179 divor
ces were granted to the roosterless
wives of knotty-buniouod New
Hampshire; and sneaking little Con
necticut severed the loose ties that
bound 4ti4 hen-pecked imbeciles to
as many free-ioverisb termagants.
The divorce record of the other ism
beds in ' six-acred New England,
doubtless ran tbe disgraceful bur
lesquing of marital affairs to a full
thousand. Congress ought to pass
a law divorcing the whole tribe and
reversing the sexes, for which it
may be able to find full power in the
patched constitution.
An Iowa Kditor ran away with a farm
er's tickle wife, and was pursued to the
end of the journey by the bereaved hus
band. The guilty ones were overtaken
several hundred miles out on tlie Western
plains. They conferred a moment, while
the exasperated husband danoed up to
them, turning over the proposition as to
what would be the upshot of it. The
editor, be it said to bis credit, purposed
to die game, so be shoved Uie woman be
tween himself and her late husband. But
when the latter waltzed up preity close,
he didn't commence disbehaviuir, put
ting on airs, and blowing his own nose and
another man's brains out. Not any. lie
ilinplyrsaid: "Dura your cussed pictur,
step my paper."
KENTUCKY NOTES.
Fifty-cent currency counterfeits are nu
merous.
TheRadsln some counties are playing
the MIsssourl possum game.
A deputy sheriff of aristocratic Fayette
Is a pure-blood Guinea-fowl.
The wife of Win. Clark, of Catletta-
burg, has fallen heir to an immense Ger
man estate.
Nicholas county has two ancient ladles
Mrs. lietsy Barton, aged 92, and Gran
ny Uollor, aged 100.
Paris has a one-eyed chicken, the
single-barreled seeing -machine being
located in the middle of tbe bead.
Isaao Shelby, a well-known citizen of
Jessamine, died lately from the ravages
of a malignant tumor on the neck. -
One baby nigger shot another 0-year-
old African through the gizzard with his
little pistol at Richmond, last week.
The plunging bowle-knlfe relieves th
monotonous ennui of rural Ufa in ail sec
tions of tlio "dark and bloody fe'roniid."
G. W. Woodward, a citizen of Loxlng-..
ton, has been acting as a member of thai
i . . . 7 1' .MuitnliAti nf t'..rt.iiitr f
uia.
The N. Y. Sun skins Congressman
Beck, as a back-pay grabber, and an ex
ploded humbug reformer. Beck has gone
to Europe.
Craildock,of tlio Paris Kentuckiau, has
ordered a liltecn-foot alligator from tlie
Louisiana bayous, to play with his little
two-year-old step-son.
Sabbatli church services at Olympian
springs. In Bath county, are interestingly
diversified by punched snouts, flourishing
weapons, and drunken brawls.
Only one John Smith in Paris, out of a
population of 3,000. Nature abhors a
vacuum; let lhc;Johii Smiths rush In to
the iuiiiiImt of a hundred or more.
Uoswcll JL Grant, brother to the dead
"fattier of lue(dead-beat) President," w ho
lives at Maysvilie, didn't hear of Jesse's
leinie till the day after the funeral.
Judge (oley, who wa killed by Rhett
n the late Mis-lsgippi duel, was fo have
passed the summer in tlie blue-grass
section, the guest of Ed. Wooldridge, ol
Woodford.
Maj. Thos. Turner and A. G. Peters,
of Mt. Sterling, are up to their ears in
grief. Their $:,(KHJ racing stallion. " Al
ia," paed in his checks suddenly a few
nights ago, and is no more.
The cyprian display, of evenings, has
become co bold at Lexington, that ladies
uo longer drive by themselves. An order
of arrest for all those plm'tonical charac
ters has been issued to the police.
The old bachelors of Carlisle have agre. d
to run races for ftic prize of a wife, tbe
losers at each annual meeting to render
all possible as istance to get the winner
boused and gal-ed pel Imps gall-ed.
Horrible. A nigger woman, says the
Shelby Sentinel, gave birth lately to
litter of half-human, half-canine brutes.
The mere mention of such a case is sick
ening; the details would be unbearable
Three Impecunious Dutchmen took
down the $100,000 prize in the late Louis
ville drawing Henry Baass, F. J. Betch-
ert, Chris. Spies. Baass dreanipt ttie lucky
iiumbei , 30,8'J3, and went and bunted it
up.
The two candidates for the Legislature
in Bracken danced an "Old Virglnny
breakdown," for tlie amusement ot voters
at a J th of July picnic at Locust Ford
The jiggers were W. F. Marshall and
Uncle Vince Hambelton.
The partisan Board of School Trustees
of Louisville declined to re-elect the
Principal of the Male High School, tie
cause lie wltlield his signature from cer
taiu diplomas, In compliance with a rule
made obligatory by the Board.
Berea college catalogue contains the
names of 04 white pupils and 154 niggers
of both sexes. Forty black-plague 'doc
tors" are being educated In tlie myste
ries of tlie "inoriar and the pestle,"
pills, pukes and cemeteiiau ethics.
Wm. G. Satterneld, a notorious char
acter of Owingsville, was killed two
weeks ago by Chas. Hoon, the jailor,
while at Court. He provoked his own
death, by drawing a weapon at the bar
He was a witness in the defense of a horse-
thief charged with sotting Owingsville on
tire.
A wonderful and successful operation
was performed at the city hospital, Louis
ville, on the 13th inst., being the transfu
sion of the blood of a lamb Into tho veins
of an emaciated patient. Sixteen ounces
were inserted in tho veins of tlie left arm,
and at last accounts It was likely the man
would live. '
A youth at Maysvilie was munching
Iwead and butler under his father's shade
tree. His attention was called to some
thing, when a caterpillar dropped him
self neatly upon the bread justat the side
where the boy hail nnulc up his mind to
insert his teeth for his next uioiitUlul
Supposing ail things lovely, be went for
the bread, and took in the caterpillar.
when the little creeper bit the boy's
tongue, and in a moment it swelled to
such size as to threaten to choke him
Powerful restoratives immediately applied
only saved the life of the caterpillared
boy.
A Nastychusetts mendicant lately called
at tlie mansard-roofed mansion of a Nas
tychosetts lord, and begged some old
clothes. It being mid-summer, the tender
hearted "triver unto the Lord" offered
tbe poor wretch a well-woru blanket
coat, which the latter bore off tardily aud
with questionable thanks. The poor devil
was ultimately run down, after a day's
hunt over Bostinc. to recover a teu-cent
shluplaster left in tho side pocket.
The-latest Nasiychusetts native novelty
Is a brace of brothers, aged 21 and 22,
who cannot say a word in any, known
language, but who use a gibberish com
prehensible to themselves. They were
dammed bv a vankee "mediumv" and
it Is more than probable she will be, by
one in greater authority.
It is positively asserted that the Persian
language is the most beautiful and adtni
rably adapted for repartee, proverbs,
social gossip and diplomacy, and that it is
the French of the East. As tbe discov
ery is Gallic, the statement is probably a
little lingual yeast of the French.- .
John Six Is the name of the happy
Johnny Chinaman who boilght his sixth
wife at auction on Grauite Creek, Idaho,
for $675. ' If she is an average woman
John Six paid just $574 95 too much for
the article. -
: Average fair green tea is ascertained to
contain forty per cent of iron-tilings, mne-
teen per cent of flue sand, and ten per
cent of weed leaves immersed in green
paint.'
FASHION NOTES.
A rat.tleless silk dress can be made to
rattle, by wearing a bustle made of
straw-rag paper.
A drab horse-blanket, with a beautifu'
block border. Is the mode for July after
noon overwear ou the South-street bully
v.trds. Summer style In shoes on the Main-
Cross promenade la a hair-cloth pud
ding bag with a live-inch deiuljohn-cork
tor a heel at one end.
Wooden buttons as large as dinner plates,
With Japanese tea-chest labels lacquered
upon them, are a Franklin-street promenade-dress
novelty
Exquisite little vests for summer even
ing toilets are made from gay-colored bed
0&mforts. podded with compressed cotton,
and lined with solo-leather.
At a late funeral, three young Lexington
ladies had but one handkerchief between
them, so they thoughtfully wept by turns,
passing the rag from one to the other as
needed.
The new Trianon fan Is all the rage. It
ts about the size and shape of a burr mill-
etone?, md not uwjk. heavier- Tbe were
designed to be run by a ten-calf-power
engine.
Embroidered muslin underwear is said
to be much worn thisscason. We haven't
made an examination, but suppose that if
it is much worn, each lady can do her own
mending.
Tlie soft, glossy skin of many of our
heart-breakingest girls wouldn't behalf
so rosy, if it hadn't first been primed.
like sallow cottonwood weatherboarding,
with white lead.
A qiieeiisware-crate mounted on a pair
of dray-wheels, and drawn by a huckster's
team, Is the killingest style of phx'ton
turnout for evening drives by singularly
handsome maids In Ijafayettc.
The lady who made an overskirt out of
a quire ot Caucasian newspapers before
they were printed, was ditched during a
late shower. She has a red mole on her
shoulder-blade; ten inches below the nap
ot the neck.
In bonnet-trimmings, the variety of
which is astounding, nothing looks so
nobby for 11 o'clock service, as a yaller
circus ticket ,on stilts, surmounted by a
blushing sunflower, and adorned by cab
bage leaves and otber garden truck.
OUR LETTERS.
THE CRY IS, STILL THEY COME.
A Half Dozen oat of Myriads.
SOUTH CAROLINA.
Tbe voice of a patriot crying in
tbe wilderness of yankonigger re
construction, make straight tbe paths
of Caucasian purification and von
geance :
Greknyillb, South Carolina,!
July 3, 1873.
Editors Caucasian Gentlemen : En
closed please find post-otlice order for
$1 25, in payment of subscription to your
outspoken paper for six mouths. 1 wish
you could wield your heavy battle-ax in
our down-trodden state, where honesty is
at a discount, and where thieves, wtu
Impunity, break through and steal.
Very respectfully, W. B
Give us half a chance, and we'll
start a branch "battIe-ax"shop down
among your plunderers and rapscal
lions. We'll raise our little hatchet
that cannot tell a lie, among your
pines and piners, and cleave the head
of falsehood with the edge of truth
We'll shout the battle-cry of freedom
and reform, till every rice field and
aea-island mosquito-bar resounds
and every thievish, vagabondish tym
panum cracks and scatters tbe giz
zard brains around it. We'll we'll
well, yes, we'll .
Another down-trodden true-man
from the pillaged and outraged land
of Marion and Sumpter a cry of
"God-speed" from tho yaukee-and
buck - baboon, bayonet -dug- hell
which was once tbe queenly Palinet
to Stato : ;
Marion, South Carolina,
June 24, 1873. f
Col. Dona n Dear sir: Pleane occept
my unaffected and unfeigned thanks for the
papers sent. iMiciosed tlud $2.00. Iong
may the Caucasian stand above the waves
oi adversity, aud continue to be the bold.
outspoken and tearless advocate of truth
and justice. lours, very truly,
T. C. M.
As long as it "stands," it will "con
tinue" to be just what it is the mor
tal foe of oppression, thievery, vil
lainy and hypocrisy, high, low, white
black, Radical, Democratic and neu
tral-mncompoopic. It will evor be
the champion of tho people against
their despoilers, of tho right against
tbe wrong, of tbe true against the
false. Down with Grant and nil
gerism ! Up with Jeff. Davis and
Caucasianism !
KANSAS.
An independent cuss from Jay-
bawkerdom realm of Saint John
(Brown) and Saints James (Lane
aud Bender) :
Enterfrisk Office, Hanover,
Kansas, .lime '73
"Pat. Donan" Dear Sir: EncPfS
find. a small amountof greenba J&r
which send your Caucasian, sou.- as
your conscience (?) will penikj;VTV) have
adopted the"N. V. Sun", style of doing
business pay for what we get, Suppose
you have no objection to our "filching"
when we send stamps. Very truly,
Nat. L. Bakbr,
Ed. Enterprise.
Stick to that "style," pay for
what you get, aud we'll bet an un
divided one half interest in Beecher's
New Jerusalem real-estate, against
a last year's bumble-bee nest, that
Hanover doggerista will rejoice over
doubled receipts. That closing
proposition shows "-enterprise" with
a vim. It suits us to a "Nat's"
heel. Of course, if yon buy a dollar's
worth of augar from a grocer, it
gives you the right to carry off
the scoop with which he lifted it,
the ecalea in which he weighed it,
the barrel from which he took it,
the sack of coffee and kit of mack
erel that stood beside it, the bunch
of brooms and dozen blue bucket
that hang above it, and any otber
597 1-2 articles there or thereabouts
to which you may take a fancy.
Of course, if you purchase a 75-oent
mulatto-baby coffin from aa under
taker, it entitlos you to the
lumber-pile from which, the ham
mers, saws, chisels and planes with
which, the bench on which, and the
akiiled journeyman arms and banda
by which, it was made ; in fact, the
boss box-maker could "have no ob
jection, to your bearing away bia
entire establishmont,building,materi
al, tools, brains and muscle, because
you had invested 15 nickels in a lili-
putian moat-chest. So, of course, aa
you pay us a ahinplaster for tbe
privilego of reading the livest news
paper in tbe universe, we can "have
no objection" to your securing all
tho labor of a 81,500 editor on your
own paper, out of ours. "Filch"
vigorously, diligently, judgmatically.
To get a paper well edited at 2,50
a year in a big thinga bully Eatmr-
prise. Sail in. Go it. Brains are
cheap.
MISSISSIPPI.
A gallant brother in ink and
thankless drudgery, from our own
noble old native state now tbe
down-trampled, brute-ruled province
of Itevels, Alcorn, Lynch and Beolze
bub frbe only gentleman in tbe
list is mentioned last. We say it de
liberately and understandiugly; for
no fellow can fail to be a gentleman
who is always polite; and in tbe
language of one of our little lady
friends, "how can the imp o' dark
ness be imp o'-ligbt ?) Hear our
colaborer and cosufferer :
Okfice of the Wkbklv Ledobr,')
Nkwton, Miss., June 21, 1873.
Col. P. Oonan Dear Sir: I have re
ceived a copy of your lively, spicy, orig
inal and inimitable paper by whom sent
I cannot divine. However, 1 trut you
will continue it tome as an "exchange."
A neninal of the conv before me has af
forded me much pleasure. I bope you
will accept mine, the Ledger, as an
exchange. 1 presume you would like to
have a Mississiopi paper containing all the
ntate news. Give the Kails the devil, and
I'll echo tbe strain. xours truly.
K. H. Hesrt,
Editor Ledger.
You're put on X list with pleasure
We'd "give the Rads the" individual
you mention, but for the facts that
he's already got them, and proposes
sooner or later to give them
an impolite something which
cockney would spell . with a haitch
and a he and a roaring double belL
KENTUCKY.
An out spoken eld reb and un
wavering friend from tbe Blue Grass
State land of Breckenridge and
Burbridge, of Marshall, Bourbon
and Bull-calves :
Hitesvii.i.f., Kentucky,!
June 27, 1873.
Col. Donan Dear Sir: I have tried to
get up a club for your valuable paper, but
understand 1 am not done yet by a mill
dam site. They all like your red-hot
Journal very much, but they are actually
afraid tnaltne l uiuDieoug will suppress it
But ot one thing you can rest assured
am going to stand by you as long as there
is a button on my old gray lacket. lour
spat at -that old arch-bummer, Sherman
was (to use tbe slang of tbe army) bully;
he deserved it all and more too. I was
at the fall of Columbia under the com
mand of the gallant W. C. P. Brecken
ridge, 'Old Cerro Gordo" being under
arrest at the time for limb-skinuing aud
Jayhawking a few of Burbridge's black
nogs at the Salt-works. I was with
Wheeler and Breckenridge at Broad
River Bridge, where they displayed as
much daring and intrepidity as rsapolaon
at the tar-famed Bridge ol Lodi. Slier
man undoubtedly set fire to the proud
and beautiful capital of the Palmetto
state; time and history will yet prove it
but I think it has been sufficiently proved
already. Enclosed you will lind a post
olllce order for two dollars and fifty cents,
($2 50), for which you will send your
Sunday hchool oriran to me lor one year
I am like the old warrior, and if 1 fail
sixty-uine times I will try the seventieth
ou shall hear from me again. Hopim
that the tan-yard Boor may not hang
you uriore the summer is over, 1 remain
as ever.
Respectfully yours, R. W. B
Sherman, the arch-bummer and in
cendiary will got that "more too"
when bo plunges beels-ever-bead for
ever evermore,inlo the eternal flames
which he himself and bis vile, blue-
coated and black-hearted under-hell-ions
enkindled in hapless Carolina !
ALABAMA.
A working friend, who comes
"beariug his sheaves with him,"
from the sunlit realms of Spencer
and John Forsythe :
Sklma, Alabama. Jnne2i. 1873.
Col. P. Donan Dear &ir: Enclosed
please lind stamps or P. O. mOney
order for seven dollars and titty ceuts
($7.50), for which send the Caucasian to
the following named persons: J. W.
Young, Selma, Ala.; A. M. Womble,
Forts, Dallas county, Ala.; F. H. Gofl",
Bellevue, same. L':t me know if' the
time of my subscription is out, and 1 will
renew at once. Change my paper from
Patona, Alt., to Selma, Ala.
Yours truly, W. K. McC. .
. Absence from home prevented our
receipt of your epistle in time to
let you know that your time ex
pired some time since. We've
started it on. Thankye, but not any
yankee in our'n.
MISSOURI.
An appreciative friend from the
mineral regions, where iron is plenty
as brass in a modern reformers' con
vention, and copper and lead are
abundant aa tin is scarce in honest
pockets editorial:
' Irondai.r,Wahixgton Co., 1
Missouri, June 25, 1873. '
Messrs. Donan A A LLitN Sirs: Plense
send two dollars' worth of Caucasian
coinnioii-senSe to Ed. Bearden. Address
as above. Enclosed find $2 specie-anui-hilator.
I may, in my peregrinations, lind
some otber uiau that appreciates rich, rare
and racy reading. If so, and he's got the
liu, I'll let you know. A- B. M.
The Caucasian has often bearded
the liar iu his den, but never before
plunged heedlessly and recklessly
into a "Bear-den." Common-senso
and flincbleas honesty form an Im
penetrable ooat of mail. Twice
thrioely is be armed that bath bia
rampuaa jaaU Them's us.
From the sweet-scented mush
room metropolis of land sharks and
greaaera :
MnrsKRI.Y, Mo,. June 2(5. '73.
M rusks. Em roiirt: Enclosed please lind
subscription price of your paper. Cau't
do without it. Respectfully,
I. A.H,
Wish 1 000,000 other would catch
that "can'trdo-without-it" itch.
TEXAS.
Short and sweet as a roasted mag
got or a lover'a vow, Irom tho far
Southwest :
Atuk.ns, IIknperson Co. , Texas, 1
June 20, 1873.
Col. Pat. Do nan: Please tind en
cloied $2 70, U. S. ctirrr.cy, to apply for
subscription for your Wliite-Mau'8 Pa
per, the Caucasian.
Yours truly, A. F. W,
- Nut ced.
A rheumatic cripple, from Indiana, ac
companied by a family of four, attempted
to pass through Kansas City on their way
to a Kansas town. They got thmngli
with their lives, but were picked clean.
Judge Baldwin, an eccentric "err, vhO
ranches at the Colorado Springs, in Col
orado territory, has been twice scalped-
He tells tho astonished red devils that
they'll never do it again, and then eorrob"
orates the truth of the proposition by rais
ing his hat from a head peeled of its last
nair.
An over crowded Miehigamler has dis
covered the best way yet of getting rid of
his offspring. He drove his wagon, con
sisting of a Michigoose and ten or eleven
Michigoslings, over a hundred mile ter
ritory, dropping one out over the tail-
hoard every few miles. He drupt the
old critter in a creek, aud got back home
the best divorced man in the slate.
Preacher life on the Texas frontier is
exhilarating. Lately iu one of the border
towns, a rtillian in the congregation rose
up as if he intended to disturb the services.
Just then tbe pious man iu tbe pulpit
brought his double-barreled shot-gun to a
present, an-.l saiil iu a sort ot per
suasive way, ' V Hliani, sit do a n, or l 11
make it painful for you." And then tbe
sermon proceeded.
The sheriff olllolt county took a crazy
man through St. Joe on his way to Ful
ton, and left him over night in the jail.
Even lunatics know of the meanness of
the iinsainlly Josepbites, so the poor
creature stood 00 bis head in bis cell ail
night, fearful of getting his throat cut for
the nickel In his pocke. When found in
the morning, his face was black, but he
had saved his neck and bis nickel.
"Are you aware, my little daughter,
that you are going to bell?" is the title of
a late forty-page jankee tract lor little
children. If the Reverend Bateboues,
who distributes them, should ever acci
dentally drop one of them over our fence
he'll limp some when he leaves, and be a
heavier man in the rudder by several
ounces of buckshot with a strong post-
scriptal probability of going there him
self.
CAUCASIAN ABROAD.
All Sorts of Dabs From all Moris
of Folks.
From Oregon, (Mo.) Sentinel, Rail, Jnne27.1
COL. DONAN AND OURSKLF.
Peter Donan, the gonial editor of the
Lexington (Mo.) Caucasian, In desciibui
to his readers what be saw and heard at
the late editorial convention, gets off' tlie
following felicitous "quidmiuc," at our
expense. Mr. Donan is an ardent south
erner, and is not yet fully willing to let
by-gones be by-gones. lie was a colonel
in the service of the late Southern Con
federacy; and though a minister of the
Campbeltite Church, he is notnt all choice
in the language he utesin his columns.
Mr. Donan was our bed-fellow for one
night, under tbe hospitable roof of Mr.
MeO,uie of Louisiana and we became very
much attached to him. The only thing we
regretted in him was his want of love for
and sympathy with tlie Union and gov
orn incut of the United States, and his
persistent attachment to ttie doctrines of
the "Lost Cause." His inclinations in
that direction are truly marvelous. Wo
are at a loss to know how if is possible for
such a good nature as he is possessed ot
to pursue the course he does in the Cau
casian, lu private lile he is a pattern of
sobriety, true etiquette and chaste deport
ment; but iu his paper he is unendurable
aud his language is horribly nrlVusive.
As. his brilliant oratory and his ardent
devotion to his convictions and principles
adapt him to a leader, we would advise
him to make a tour through Europe (or
his poiiticnL health. In our opinion he
will never make a Union man and iu good
faith support, the stars and stripes until he
goes abroad and converses with the de
feated followers of Kossuth, Maziui,
Louis Blanc, Walewski, Ac. We are in
deed very anxious that Col. Drinan should
once more become reconcih-d to this coun
try and employ his tine powers in promo
ting the perpetuity and grandeur of the
Uniied American Republic.
The Colonel has our sympathy fur
having been compelled to sl.-ep with a
radical editors We hopeoiir "nearness"
to him ou the occasion ailu.l-;d to, has
not contaminated him so as to cause a
falling otTin the number of his subscribers.
The Colonel has certainly- e-oiped a great
danger. ,
From Ihe Westminster Monthly, eulton, Mo.
DON AN '8 WOMAN.
It was announced in our last issue that
Col. Donan, of ihe Lexington Caucasian,
would deliver two lectures here upon the
subjects, "Woman" and "Mu." Ac
cordingly on Friday evening, a large
and intelligent audience assembled at tne
Chapel, to hettr . "what, an exemplary
bacUelor knew about woman."
The Colonel appeared alwjut eiirht
o ciock, was introduced to tlie audioi.c
and began his lecture in a mot! a'tractive
and entertaining manner, by taking a trip
around the world, stopping twenty
minutes for refreshments at Jerusalem, ' -and
soon arriving at St. Louis, the start
ing point, all to prove that men are
under a universal she-ocraci .
Having the curiosity oi his auditors
wrought to the highe.-t pilch, he was now
prepared to hold up to them the faults and
deformities of women, and to show that
the true woman is the noblest of al! God's
creatures. He dwelt at some length ipn
fashion's follies, pointing out some of ihe
direful evils, and then closed with a plain
aud earnest talk to the girls, sidni. mill
ing them that they talked too much.
On Saturday evening he unbosomed
himself upon "Babies and Men." He
prepared his audience for what was coin
ing by saying that every mother in the
house would vote him a pagan and a
lunatic. He seems to have a natural an
tipathy tor the little iuuocenis and appar
ently Is worse than a Herod. Doub.less,
the young ladies who, the evening before,
hail heard him upon womau wouihii in
Uie bad, woman cankered and worm
eaten, woman as a dragon-llo wcr and a
imtlower, and the true woman were dis
appointed that he did not elaborate more
extensively upuu the faults aud foibles of
men.
Sunday afternoon be gave a free lecture
In the Christian church, which he termed
ortbodjox enough for Protestant or Catho
lic. Iu his remarks upon the progress of
religion, he said the Methodists were the
advance guard,, the Presbyterians the
heavy-armed uiiautry, the Baptists and
Campbellite-Christians the marine host,
and the Hard-shell Baptists the iron-olad
gun-boats.
For a conglomeration of sense, non-
euse, truth, burlesquing, preaching,
declamation and beauty of expression,."
Col. Donan'g lectures were Indeed grand.
There Is an absolute mystery connected
with the Colonel. While be Is an anti
ladies' man, and declaims forcibly against
litem, there seems to be a magnetic cur
rent around him, and when one comes .
within the radius of its Influence, he is at
tracted towards him. In truth, .he is a
perplexing puzzle. We would advise all
who have never heard him, it tlie oppor
tunity is offered, to do so, for you will un- ,
doubtedly get a half-dollar's worth.
from too Moberly (Mo.) EnterprUe, July If.
Max Adeler ay of the Lexington Cau
casian man : Nothing gives as more respect -for
a man than to sea him use temperate
language In discussing persons whom he
does not like. Tbis Is the reason why we
have a profound regard for the editor of
the Lexington (Mo.) Caucasian. lie is a
man who restrains himself when he feels
mad. He was bitterly opposed to tlie re
cent congressional convention in St. Lonis,
and he said so ; but instead of denouncing it
with violent language, instead of hurling,
foul epithets at it, instead of abusing the
members and blackguarding them, arid
calling them vile names, and indulging in
vile indecency and Vulgarity, ho chose A
better and more Christian course, and
merely referred kindly but decidedly to
tlie convention as "an aimless and fruit
less catawntnpus of nincompoopic " gab
Riiirt8 and rapscallions." And then wo
aupuoslic haul I us heat I shaved ami went
to bed. When such amiable gentlemen
as this control tbe press and help to form
public opinion, it would be ridiculous not
to expect the rapid growth of America.
From tbe aloberly (Mo.) Monitor, July 1. J
1'eter Donan, of the Lexington Cau-
casian, has not yet learned that a news-.
paper is not intended as a vehicle Dy wiueu
the private unite and malice oi its euiujr
should find an outlet. The low down abuse
of Governor Woodson by Mr. Donan, tie- .
r.'icts from rather than adds to bis repu
tation as a newspaper man, and, to put it
mldiy as we can, is simply disgraceful to
he proiesion. Oonan lias virtually aa-.
mitted that his course and that of his
paper in the last Gubernatorial canvas
was controlled by a .',uuu lee irom a rival
candidate of Woodson, and his abuse of
the latter now can be well accounted for
on other grounds 'ban a virtuous desire
o -ubserve the public good. People who
advertise their influence for sale to the
highest bidder, should certainly lie cbar-
liable and courteous, at least in speaking
l i he short -comings of their fellows.
"hedavsof Dorian's Tom. Fletcher and .
John McNeil literature are over, and it
seems to us he should know it.
(From the Cnaplet.Edittd and Pablisbtd by th ;
loung Lad lea oi oiepnenn tonege, voiiuu
bia, Juoe 1878 J
PLEASANT INTERVIEW. '
Col. P. Donan, editor of the Caucasian,
honored Stephens College with a visit a
few days since. This learned and expe
rienced editor, tearing les-t ne sliouid oe
again published as wanting in etiquettes
interviewed me editorial Stan ei me yoap-..
l-t. How our editorial importance ex-,
panded, rose and puffed up iuthe prsen-e
of such a renowned pertonage. His lively ,
conversation and sage advice merited
the high admiration we had long cher
ibhed. We enjoyed the visit yery much.
and only regret that other editors do not
accept remote suggestions as well as ioi.
Douau. r; ; ; - .
IFYoui the Brownsville (Mo.) Banner, July 12.1
i'l'he Lexington Caucasian is edited by two ' '
-,luiuinics who have (ailed in everything .
eUe they have undertaken, consequently,
art) sour, cross, aud spiteful towards :
everybody whom they meet that is pros-
poring. They both fought, bled and
died for the lost cause, but have not the -remotest
idea that the cause is lost. They
hate the "best government the sun ever
shone on," blueTCOats, yankee men and
women, churches, school-houses, and
eveu decency in fact, everything buf
slang and she niggers.
The following we clip from that delect
able sheet, of last week, and it is a fair
specimen brick of its entire contents: '.
From tbe Warrentoti (Mo.) Banner.
CAl'CASIAXISMS.
The egottgasbag of the "Caucasian"
has called in his demi-pulpiratical warU.
dcrings, and settled down again to. bore
the people at large through tlie columns
ot that paper. Here are a tew of 'the
latest Douanisms; .
BIZ IS BIZ.
From the rUiU.ltlphia (Pa ) Age.J
The editors and publishers of Missouri
recently met In convention, aud passed a
feries of resolutions of a business charac
ter. The speeches delivered in relation
to matters embraced in the resolutions
were of a practical character, and showed
that the men connected with the news
pajiers of Missouri are in earnest, mean
what they say, and will act upon the
new platform as a unit. If they do,
there will be a fluttering among the small
men of Missouri, who are raised to iui-:
poitauce by the notice aud attention of
the press.
IFrom the Mexico (Mo.) Messenger, July 3. 1
'Dead-heading' ' is practiced to a great
er extent on the press than it is on rail
roids. Everybody "dead-beads" on the
press. Some Inirrow their neighbor's pa
per; and read it regularly every week,
with as much importance as though they
had a receipt for a year's subscription iu
their pocket; others take and read the pa-p-rsix
months or a year and then cheat
the publisher out of his pay, which is the
meanest kind of dead-heading. Some men
will go into a store or shop, pick up a pa
per regularly, and read it, to save three
or four cents a week, when, if he was a
regular subscriber, himself and whole fam
ily might have tbe benefit of it. ' n' "
From the Memphis (Tenu.) Appeal.
Whenever a gentleman wants anything
published, whether it interests the public
or only an individual, be is willing and
will propose to pay. Somebody mut pay
for ic, and hereafter it will not be the
printer. The fact that the proposed pub
lii'.ilioti would interest tbe public has noth
ing to do..'ith ttie matter in issue. News
pipers are private, not public property.
I'hey are piitilislie.l to make money tor
their owners, and if anybody would use
(hem they must pay the cost. Never did
w e go to a merchant and use his goods for
any public purpose without paying, aud
it we and hundreds of others the public
employ a lawy r about a street or other
highway, we pay the lawyer. Tbe dodge
is very tirei-ome; it. is very old, and we
hope to hear ol it no more forever. If
you want souie .-iieiue ventilated, wheth
er it interest yourself alone or thousands.
you and your thousands must not expect
ui to pay the cost.
IFeom the I'laltcmoulh- (Ncbra&Ba) Watchman.
June Jti.
NO MOKE DEAD BEATS. '
In common with the newspaper press
all over ihe country (oun-elf included) tbe
Dakota City Mail sys: Pursuant to the
accepted basis of reform now permeating
all classes of men, we have determined to
make the following the basis of our opera
tions: The farmers, mtchanios, mer
chjtits and even railroads are crying re-
form. Congress htis passed laws sbuttiii" '
off newspaper exebanges, aud railroads
have passed resolutions stopping ihe pa-g
system. For all this, we say, thanks ,
gentlemen. We can well see who will
eoine out first best in tbe fight; so here
goes for reform. We pay for our whistle;
the dead-beating public must pay for
theirs. Hereafter we must charge lor all
church, charity, festival, celebration,
ball, excursion, convention, personal, or
any other local notice, at the usual tweu
ty cents per line rates. 1 a politician
wants an editorial notice, or a private en
terprise a "puff, ' they will be required
to pay twenty-live cents per line few each. :
and every line. If conventions want their
minutes published, they can afford to pay
local rates; as onr type, ink, paper, and
labor cost cash, and our talent is worthy ,
of Its hire. If candidates want to be.
brought before the public for office, they '
can pay for it. Railroads that want tlie
use of our columns, must pay the usual'
rates, to he paid yearly. No more
dead-heading on us, wbeu we use
their roads only once In a year; and some
times not all. All societies and ordera
that want resolutions and notices publish- '
ed, will be charged at regular rates. Mar-
riage notices must be paid tor lit advance. ,
r