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STHE DON OALDSONVILLE, CHIEF.
Offlcial .Journtl of the State of Louisiatna, Pari lh oIf Ascentiou and Town of Donaldsonville. VOLUME IV. I)tONALDSOINVILLIE, LA., SATI.'I DAY, DECEMBER 12, 1874. NUMBE44.l Sonalbsonlbillc hicf. Amienos unuani Generis. A Wide-Awake Home Newspaper, Publishwd Every Saturday, at Donaldsonville, Ascension Parish, La., -BY LINDEN E. iIENT|LEY, EDITOR AND POPRIEnTOR. TERMS OF SURISCRIPTIOV : One copy, one year............... $3 00 One copy, six months ................. 1 50 Bix copies, one year ...................15 00 Twelve copies, one year...............125 00 Payable invariably in advance. ADVERTIHSING RATES: [A square is the slpce occupied by ten lines Agate type, about a of an iuch.J SQUARES. I mo. Imos. 3 mos. u mos. 1 year Squaret.. ) 3 00$ 5 00 $ 6 .')111 f0 $15 0O ) 2 squares. 5 00 8 00 9 50 15 00 2o on 3 squares. 7 00 11 00 12 50 19 10 5 0k 4 sqiuares. 8 50 14 On 15 00 23 00 30 o0 5 squares. 10 0If 16 00 17 001 27 0o .l f) 6 squares- 11 50 18 00 19 00 3: 00 40 00 7 squares. 13 50 l0 0021 00 33 00 41 00 8 squares. 15 00 22 00 24 0f0 36 0f "In o0 colmn. 2.5 00 :32 50 40 00 50 o0 7f 0. column . 35 00 -12 50 50 0ff 70 70 0100 00 column. 45 00 5 50) 60 00 90 00 125 00 Transient advertisements $1 00 per square irst insertion; each subsequent insertion, 75 cents. All official notices $1 00 per square each publication. Brief communicatines upon subjects of public interest solicited. No attention paid to anonymous letters. The editor is not responsible for the views of correspondents. Address: CHIEF, Donaldsonville. La. Agents for the Clhiel Win. G. Wilkinson, Dounaldsonvile. La. Gervats Gauthreaux, J. C. W. Richardson, Dominique's Land'g. Augustus Knight, Linwood Place. Dr. A. B. Robertson, Dutch Stores. John Dixon, New River. Thes. McIntyre, New Orleans. Chas. 0.. Donnand, Geo. P. Rowell & Co.. New York. P. H. Walker & Co., Baltimore. Md. ur a anmnm POLITICAL DIRECTORI'. Union Repub. Congressional Committee. Z. CIHANDLERI. President. JOHN A. LOGAN, Visl'resident. A. H. Caigen, John Clbur'n, N. P. Chipman, I.. .& Havens, Eageme Hale, S. B. Conover, Gee. W. Hendee, J. W. Flhmagaa, Ilency L. Pierce, James Wilson, J. M. Pendleton, G. W. Hazlet.on, H. H. Starkweather, S. O. Houghton, Thos. C. Platt, J. H. Louiad; Marcu L. Ward, H. I. Strait, Simon Cameron, . J. II. Mitchell, Win. J. Albert, S. A. Cobb. John F. Lewis, A. I. Borenman. C. L. Cobb, Win. 1. Stun ..t,. Rtich'd 11. Whiteley, P. W. Ilitchcoek, Geo. E. Spencer, Powell Clayton, Geo. C. McKee, S. B. Chaffee. J. Rodney West, R. C. McCormick, H. 8. Bundy, S. B. Elkins, J. M. Thornburg. Address communications to Hon. Z. Chan dler, President, or to the Secretary of the Union Republican Congressional Committee, Washington, D. C. Republican Central Executive Committee, State of Louisiana. 8. B. PACKA RI), President. JAMES LEWIS, Vice President. CHARLES HILL, Secnretary. L. LAMANIERE, Assistant Sec'y. J. R. G. PITKIN, Corresp'd'g Sec'y. B. F. JOUBEIT, Treasurer. StnB-EXECCTIVE COMMITTEE. 8. B. Packard, Chairman ex-officio. B. F. Flanders, James F. Casey, B..'. Jonbert, C. W. Lowell, .Michael Hahn, James Longstreet, James Lewis, U. C. Antoine, John S. Harris, T. T. Allain, K. A. Bray, F. Riard. FINANCE COMMITTEE. O. C. Bluadin, Chairman. B.'F. Joubert. P. B. S. Pinchback, C. F. Ladd, ..T. B. Stamps, Levi Darrall, John (jair. Williali-F. Loan, J. L. IHerwig, * Thomas A. Cage, L. E. Bentley. ADIDITIONAL MEMBERS. E. W. Dewees, George Y. Kelso, Raford Blunt, Allen Greene, J. Ed. Burton, ). C. P. Hill, Louis J. Souer. Communications should be addressed to the president, Hon. S. B. Packard, New Or leans, La Republioan Congressional Committee Third District of Louisiana. P. G. DESLONDE of Iberville, President. Ascension............ Louis Lefort, Assumption ..........Meyer Kahen, Calcasieu ...........C. Barbe, Cameron..........L.... I. Tansey, Iberia ................ M. Scule, Iberville .............George Randolph, Lafayette...........F. Martin, LafoutIst;.TAGM AL)Villiam Murrell, St 4 a........,.....Cbarles .fien, St. Mry ............. Noel Shadrick, : T beae ............ W. II. Keys, Veseilion............J. A. Broekshier, Republocan Parish Executive osumittee , frihh of Ascension. If ,g'RE LANDRY, President. L. . BENTLEY, Secretary. ptA..A:ONE8, Assistant Seretary. :. JK HILL, Treasurer. ;S.oni Butler, George Diggs, Ou.lirsite, Carpenter Jenkins, WiUli.Johnson, George Woodside, Mautretlohnson, Edwad (Cantey, dN. Rew,.J. Louis Lefort, K pel, 'sl . hathm Hays, Joa vand, Frederick Fobb, V. (. Cantrelle, Cittc Jackson,. !. rles Henry, vaote sv -. oberson, r vote, Al .a-Jln W. Graves, Henry Ifownwn, oJasept'Carter, Augutus 1 ljg4li Allan 8teVpheni. Isa Thorit i n, ahur Burnett, N cogMITTEE. E. REITLEY. Chairman. )$ITY 'T'reasurer. y Hayman, bFrederiek Fobb, Aaron Hill, Albert Braudy, N. #,.Conway, Hillery R iee. Vice President Wilkon. His Opinion Regardine the Recent Elec tions. A reporter of the New York Tri bune has had a talk with Vi(ce Presi dent.t Wilon, and obtaiined from him somilnle expre'ssiOn of opinion upon11 the rcsults of the late elections. Among other things the Vice President said: *' The result of the election shows the inecssity of a liberal and Imagnaii n(us ipolicy. It shows that RIepubli can leaders must be statesmen. The need of the time is statesmaninship. With a proper policy and with the best sncy of the party at the front, 1 think, said Mr. Wilson, that the lI Re publicans canl inl twoyearscarry every one of the old free States anlld soe of the old. slave States. It is probable that th1e tlRepulbli(.all party will be sti:er,gtlhened and helped by iith(e oli cy \t hichl the em)tocrats will pursue Salter Itheir accession to power. ITh( histiory of the D)emocratic party for tre last twenty years has been 'a series of blundeirs. l e said that lie diid not o (nsider thlat the i esult of the elections iutlic ated a t orough or pernarieint revohdutioQ in public opinion, or that this Ireult lbreshadolwed the conclu ion of the next Pi esidential camlpaign. But the r.ulriblicani party, to Iegaino what it has lost, he said, rmust adiopt a wise, liberal and high-toned policy ; imust crowd its raniks with all tih worthy elewmcnts it can secure, and roust be calst al not to alicLnate any Igood nmin from the party. Above ail it must put the best men fiorward. "That is the only polic3 fbr a larity to 'pursue ; Iii that \\; a alone can it be kept at a high sta.iLndad, and gain and retain success. Larinst etlorts should be made to win back to the party. the good imen u ho had left it." The Vice President then, with deep feelinlg and most decided emplhasis, asserted his owtl position upon the tlird term c leestioni. I the folhi sing worths: " ' For my part, 1 wonld oprpose wit H all umy strength the electionu of an mall to a third termn, were he the best who ever lived ill this coulntrl), except in the. t;c of a peril to the country so geaLt adi thrta tening that 1 would be m illiig to advocate to avert it a plaiu and ldirect violntion of the Constitutiont--a violation thatpshouht lie acck unowledged antl conldoncd only if there were no other menalls to save the country slould any lall be chosen a third terml." Aniotler reasuio for the oppositioni to the third-term propositiin, said lMr. Wilsol, is the walked dissatin fatction with Ilmen who have collie to plowlr or beei apllpoirited to othice inl various paitst of the c;niitiry. The ativ ocac5y of a third-tcir u cac fri'om time boSomsi of the men of whom thet people complain V.ith the iutectlioil of pet petuating their power. The idea was opposed to the prttjudlicees--aind the just convictions, too-the wishes, feelings and interests of the great mallls of the peopile, and it is uo wonu der that threy have thortoughly put it down . T'hese elcctions haIvnc settled the third-telin question Jor the iext hundred 3 ears. - - - Another cause for thie desire of change whvicih tound vent on tlhe 3rdt of November, was the oplosition of the people to certain men who have been prominent in tile party, and to cert4ain oflice-holders. I hope that last Tuesday's work will have the ef fect of plurit inug and strengthening the party, and lead it to put its best met ini the place of sonic who have been conspicuous in it. The state of things in the South, also, has borne hard upon tie party, and has influenced the election, but I consider that the course of ithe Re publican party towards the Southern btates generally has been based on correct principles. The men who came into power in the South at the time of Andy Jtlhnson muade a s steml of laws to oppllress the bIlacks and de prive them of their rights, which made their condition worse then slavery itself. These laws were ter rible in the their cold-blooded bru tality, and when laid fully before the people, as I shall show them in a chapter of my book, they will shock the worll. The Republican party established equal rights in the South, and any men who attempts to grind down the blacks and take away their rights, imust learn that they will be crushed and buried out of sight. Eqlla. rights must be maintained in the South, but I believe In as generous a policy as possible, and favor the res toration of the privileges of the small number of Southerners who are still disfranchised. There are probably not more than one hundre:d and fifty in all now. The Republican party $as been stigmatized for the misdeeds of office-holders and legislators in the Southern States. I do not see why this party, because it established equal rights, should be held respon sible for the crimes of every negro, or of every carpet-bagger and scala wag in the South, any more than the National Democratic party should he held ,esponsible for the way in which the city government of New York was carried on in the time of Tweed. The New York Herald in a two column article, insists upon the cor rectness of its recent statement of Democratic plans in Louisiana, and says: "' The trouble which will in evitably follow the assemblage of the Legislature in January will be next, in magnitude, to that which fourteen years ago threatened a disruption of the Union." News Items. Congress convened Monday. Another overfiow of the T''iber river is feared at Ihomle. Germany is to Irhave aniI Tmrerial Bank at Berlin. Railronal companies owe the govern ment $7,50,1 10). The (arlists claim a victory over General Despnllott.ss. One of the Wellshoro, Pa., hank rob bers has been convicted. Dr'. Livingston's jorn:rls have been safely recovered from Africa. Tihe Il avana police drive gold brokers oft the streets in that city. Sir Arthur Goirdon has been ap ptointed ;ove'rnor of the Fejee Islands. There is a rumor that DIon ('arlos is negotiating with ex-Queen Isabell. It is intimnated that. McMahor will form a new ministry after January 1st. Profeissor Holzendorf will defaind Conut \'ou Arnminu at the approaching trial. The Cheap Tranrsportation Connven tion adjourned Sine die, Friday- eve The village of Karns C'ity, Pa., was aldnrost wholly destroyed by tire on the g14l. The Arkansas Senate memorializes ('ongress for a renoval of the tax on toiac;ico. The -Secretary of War, in his Ieport, dliscourages the present reduction of the army. Francis Alexandre has been elected president of the Pacific Mail Stearrm lhip Companry. The Alablnma Grand Lodge of F. & A. M. assemblled Monday last, at. Montgomery. Gen. Roblrt 0. Tyler, U. S. Army Quartermaster of the district of the Allantie, is dead. Jno. F. Seymour, wholesale New York crockery nmercllhant, has failed. Liabilities, $2010,000. Dr Rush of Colncordlia, Mo., was hanged biy a mob last Sunday night, for arson and robbery. The impression prevails ill Wash ington that (Congress will let Lonisi aria and Arkansas aloue. Mr. Cate, Democrat, is elected to Congress from the Eighth Wisconsin, district by two majority. Congressman Phelps was defeate'1 for re-election in tIlrh fifth New Jer sey district by two votes. A Boston displatclh announices that flhe Housic railway tunml will ill be cuompleted in a few weeks. Mr. Phelps of New Jersey will in troduce a bill in Congress to repeal the " newspaper gag latw." London is alanrnied over the dis covery of eight (a(ses ,of sma;ll-pox in a vessel ly ing at that plrt. The loigshnoremen's strike in New York has ended ,by a colmliromnise andl the men are resuliilg work. The Con it-Ilouse at Franklin, Ind.. was destroyed by fire Tuesday night. It was firedl by incendli;aies. Bothl's Theatre, New York, was sold at auction last week, and bought by Oliver Am is for - 36,5,04l. Arkansas Congressional elections are to be held hereafter on the same day as those for State officers. The board of audit report the debt of the )istrict of Columbia at .*14, 000,(K)0 inclusive of resources. The Chesapeake and Ohio railroad company paid off sixty striking em ployees and dlischargedl thenm. Thirty thousand operatives in the jute imills of Dundee have struck agaiinst ai r edtion of their wages. The Pari~ anking honse of the Rothschilds hlu advancud 30,000,004) reals to the government of Spain. Two hoys and a girl, venturing out too farl on thin ice, at Rochester, N. Y., fell through and were drowned. Patrick Cusick killed his brother in-law, John Haflerty, with an axe, near Reading, Ohio, during a fight. The New Hampshire Prohibitionists have nominated a State ticket, head ed by Nathaniel White for Governor. Hon. Charles MeIlrath, ex-State Auditor of Minnesota, will be prose cuted for alleged defalcation of $94, 6i00. The Pennsylvania Historical Society celebrated its semi-centennial with a banquet, at Philadelphia, on the 2nd inst. Theodore Tilton can not fulfil his lecture engagements, owing to legal proceedings that occupy all his atten tion. In districts where second ballots were ordered for Deputies, in France, the Republicans have made large gains. Rev. Jno. S Glendenning of Jersey City has been tried by the Presbytery of that city and acquitted of all charges. The Carlist leader Lorgano was captured. tried and shot, having been adjudged guilty of assassination and robbery. The president of the Pacific Mail Steaiship ('Company announces that certai n d:;nl;tnging reports coucerning the liabilties if that corporation are unfiouided. President. MIcMahon's message to the French Assembly has produced a favorable impression upon the people ( of Franiice. Three men were killed at Fall Riv I er, IMass., hy the Explosion of a pnen matic tube which they were engaged in sinking. The C:arlist leader s Velasso and i.iula have unsilecessfully attempted to enter the province of Marcia with their troops. Mlr. MArtliur has not yet signified hiis arcepta'ce of the positioi of Su i peri.isilg Architect of the Treasury Department. HIon. f. ). Urncan, ex-Chief Justice of South Carolina, and the oldest law yer in the State, died last Saturdtiy, at Charleston. M. Vermiselh, formerly editor of Pertc D1),ch..n , official journal of the Pa iis ('commune, has been ordered to quit Belgium. Commanider WVi. G. Cushing of the U. S. Navy, who cut out the Alber nmarle daring the war, han gone to an inIsane ai. n llmmm. A looin'mtive exploded at Delaware, Ohio, laIst week, and the enginieer, firenman and several bystanders were severely scalded. A clerk in tile foreign department of the banking house of Drexel & Co., New York, is a defaulter to the aiiount of w216,0(9). Daniel I'armalee, a highly respected citizen of Elkham, Neraska, shot and killed a rough eharacter mamed Tom Keeler, last Saturday. A committee of the French Assem Iiy has cenlsulr(ed Garihahli for quit ting his command toward the close of lthe war without leave. Representative Houghiton of Cali fornia will introduce in (Congress a hill to aid the construction of the Southern Pacific railroad. Forty thousand men have been tlhrownl out of employment in Pitts burg by a niis.umderstaeding with iron founilers relative to wages. Colonel Tirnbull, who wa,'a mem her of Gen. Sheridan's staff during his fantmous ride through the ,Shena:l doah valley, (lied last week. Russia desires the reassembling of the recent Brussels International Law conlference at, St. Petersburg. England declines to tLke part therein. A colored mlan named Isaac Ruftin was lynched by citizens of Mariou, Arkansas, for raping and beating two girls (colored) near that place. A political riot oceurred at Tahle quhll, Indiai Territor y, two weeks since, lduring whicih (oe man was. killed and a number wounded. Ex-Mayor Ilhvelmever's funeral was a grand affair. Among the pall bearers were Governor elect Tilde'n, Peter Cooper and Thurlow W;eed. 'lThe Grand Vizier of Turkey, has suned the editor of the Lcvant Herald, an English pape(r plublihed. in (.,ou stantinople, for libel and defamation of chatral;ciiter. Ki ng Kalakana left Sanr Francisco for W\ashiington Ilast Saturday morn ing. lie reachedl ()mrina \\dnesday and was ostentatiously received by tle :rithorities. The New York Customn-House alu thorities seized six trurnks ofs:nug gleed goods in a mnilliner's establlish menit on Blroadwy. The value of the .goods is 1.5,000. The Argentine governmen t lhas conlplitely sullnhdued the insurrection 1by detiiating the retlels and capturing Genl. Mitre, their leader, who sur rendered uncon litionally. The Bishop of Urgel, heretofore a hot ipartisan of 1)ou Carilos, has writ ten a letter renouncing the cause anid declaring that he advised Don Al pholiso to take a like course. A son of Dr. West, a New Orleans dentist, shot and killed himself while handling a rifle which a friend had left in the house for safe-keeping, Friday evening of last week. A passenger train ran off the track near Woodville, New Hampshire, the morning of Dec. 2nd. A brakes man was instantly killed and several passengers seriously injured. The cheap Transportation Conven tion which met at Richmond expressed disalolrov\al of the granting of gov ernrllent sunlsidies to railroads and other lines of transportation. Exciting debates occur daily in tlhe German iReichstag or Congress. Prince Bismarck is the leading figure, and the Catholic partisans find it up-hill work to cop). with him in argument. Incendiaries are rampart in South Carolina, and at a recent mass-meet ing of citizens at Edgetield. in that State, it was resolved to lynch all persons caught in the business here after. Frederick A. Doekray who was condemned to death by the Spaniards in Cuba, but whose sentence was sub sequently commuted to ten years im prisonment in Spain, has been par doned. The town calaboose at Pontiac. Il1., was destroyed by fire on the night of the 2nd inst., and two prisoners. Frank and Samuel Downing, arrested for disorderly conduct, were burned to death. The IPope hi;.s al-,ol.tely refused to recomini-rlni thlle hi,hops iomprisoned1 in Brazil ro ri-sign their sees ts a nluas nre for the reconciliation of their dif lereuces with the government of that country. The store of R. Potter. & Son, at Westfield, Penn., was entered by hlrglars, S ;tllrday night, who rifled the sale of abont $10,(X)0, then set fire to the building, which was totally destroyed. It is stated that Butler will not press the civil rights bill, which is second on the Speaker's desk in the House of Representatives, unless he is i'nstructkil to do so by the judiciary committee. The Spanish coastingsteamer Tomas Brooks, from Santiago de Cuba for Guantanamo, struck on the Morrillo, near Guantanautuo on the 31st inst., 'ail sank immediately. About thirty lives were lost. A Cincinnati policeman who had been suspended from d(hty for drunk enness made a desperate attempt to commit suicide,Sunnday last, by shoot ing himself in the breast and ear. He will prdobably die. Lieut. Gov. Smith, Secretary of State Wheeler and other prominent Arkansas ex-officials have arrived in Washington, and will endeavor to secure Coniressiona! action upon the Arkansas muddle. Edward Madden, editor of the San Francisco Tribune, was shot and killed in that city, on the 7th, by II. Gre nnu, a step-son of the editor of the Sian Joaquin A riqus. An attempt was made to lynch the murderer, but the Sheriff concealed him. The grand jury which indicted Har rington and others for safe burglary in Washington was illegal, and the indictments have been quashed. At the recent trial of this case, the jury ounld not agree, standing ten for ac quittal and two for conviction. Senator West of Louisiana has in troduced a bill in the Senate requir ing the Poasmaster General, without delay, to construct a telegraph line from Washington to Boston, via Bal timore, Philadelphia, New York and Iiartford, to be operated in the post offices of those cities. The cable steamer La Plata, bound from London to Rio Grande Del Sud, I fonuldered at sea. Sixty lives were I lost, including the captain, surgeon and three other otlicers, the engineer, seven stewards and cooks, eleven stokers, fourteen seamen, the chief electrician and the entire cable staff, numbering sixteen. The Cliban insurgents captnred the vill;ge, of San Geranimo recently, svcning 150 rifles, 25,000 cartriges and a quantity of cloth ing, besides taking the entire Spanish garrison prisoners. In the fight at the taking of the place the Spaniards lost sixty t killed while only two of the attack ing party were killed. At a meeting of general railroad freight agents held in Chicago, on the 3rd, arbitrary rates were imposed upon freights from St. Louis to points West. It was agreed that no road after Jannary 1st would con tract for freight below the rates es tablished in Juine. The free pass system will be abolished after Jan nary 1st. A dispatch from City of Mexico. dated Decenmber 3rd, says: Articles of amrendments to the constitution making change~ in Congress ere sol emnly promulgated as law in the land with the firing of cannon, ringing of bells and a grand military review by the President. Debate is now pro gressing in Congress on a bill restrict ing the powers of the Catholic Church. One clause provides for a complete separation of Church and State, and another for the expulsion of the Sis ters of Charity from the republic. A Kansas City dispatch of the sth reports a hold robbery : About half past three o'clock this afternoon as the Kansas and Pacific train reached Muncie, a few miles west of this city, five masked men flagging and strop ping it, cutting off the passenger coaches, moved the engine and ex press cars some distance forward andl robbed Wells, Fargo & Co's. safe of about $27,000. One case of gold dust for Kountz Brothers, New York, con taining $5000, was also carried off. All were large men, rode bay andr brown horses, and were heavily armed with Ilenry rifles and revolvers. The express compnany offers a reward of S10,000, the railway company $5000, and Governor Osborne 82500, for the recovery of the funds and arrest of the robbers. do -0040 We are told that the white leaguers are being supplied with ammunition for the purpose of fighting the State authorities, in case the Returning Board fails in any way to meet their demands. It appears to be the de termination of the white leaguers to carry the elections in their favor by driving the Returning Board to their terms, or in other words to gain what they have lost by nmismanagement, by threats of violence. In the Sixth Senatorial District the fusion candi date for Senator might have been elected, but for the pure cussedness of some of the unterrified in voting for Tnrnbull, and in that way divid ing the vote. It hardly seems the fair thing to now, in spite of their own factious coudlict. insist on having a majority in the legisiltnre whiethu, they cast a maiority of votes or not. -State RegiSter. Laughing Gas. Natural slippers--Eels. Good bread is often much kneaded. Open-order--" Six on the half shell." The fastest city in the world-Eleo tricity. Never waste your time; wastesome body else's. You can't "take a trick" with "the trump of fame." Many "play the knave" without ever coming to the card table. There are six George Washingtons in the Pennsylvania State Prison. When a thermometer falls, how often on an average dues. a breakL. - King.uKoffeewho bs tee hoiliigen over lately, has settled down again. Mrs. Godaule, of Pequonic Conn., is 100 years old. Good ale keeps well. A worn-out shoe is like ancient Greece, because it once had a Solon (sole on). It is a good thing to be above board, but generally a bad thing to be over board. An Iowa justice the other day ac cepted two bushels of the pungent onion as a marriage fee. A French milliner conceived the novel idea of having the ladies wear their hats on their heads. The tomb of Augustus at Rome is to be used for a theatre. The ex-Em peror retains his private box. Danger lurks in every thing, ap parently, for now we .are informed of an explosion of ice-cream in Read ing, Pa. The French Prince Imperial has ears like a Milwaukeean, and his pho tograph is doing him a great deal of damage. Grump accidentally sat on a red hot coal, and spent the night follow ing in trying to turn so he could see his wound. "Cheap and hungry dances" are a Vermont institution. There are no refreshments, and the fun stops at 12 o'clock. Half a million dogs keep the peo ple of New Mexico in bark. If the tonic does them good they are wel come to it. Why did she turn her back on you young man ~ Innocent child! She wishld to make an exhiibition of her new overskirt. The Aldermren of Kansas City are' irreverently spoken of by a local jour nal as " the gentlemen with the red eyes and nose." A Frenchman wishing to compli nment a young lady by calling her a gentle lamb, said: "She is one mut ton as is small." A circus lion is roaming around Weston, Missouri, and people have a good excuse for remaining away from prayer-meetings. A New Orleans paper off(:rs the sentiment thus: "George Washing ton-First in war, first in peace, and last in getting a monument." We can't all be run over by loco motives or killed by boiler explosions. An Indiana man has just been crushed to death in a corn grinder. It is singular that mineral waters are only beneficial to the wealthy. We inever knew a physician to advise a poor mali to go to any watering place. A Boston philosopher says that yon want to look at men's boots heels to discover their energy. A slow, sloth ful man runs his boots over at the heels. A Colorado exchange says: "The Canon City girls don't take kindly to crosluet. They say it is too high toned for them. Leap-riog is their best hold." A s1ectre carpenter, who saws and hammurers and docs other things in cidental to his trade, is making the owners of a house in Richmond, Va., very miserable. "A confidential clerk in a Chicago cattle yard has just skipped out with several thousand dollars. The New York Conmmercial thinks be has prob ably taken passage for Cowes. Without a desire to brag, the De troit Free Press points to a Michigan sunflower nineteen feet high, and respectfully inquires after the health of other sunflowers around the coun try. A Council Bluffs lawyer ate peannts in court and was fined $10 for (Scn tempt. The Judge remarked that he was determined to uphold the majesty of the law if it killed the entire pea nut crop of the South. If. as Emerson says, "in the woods we return to reason and faith," what intelligent and believing mortals they must be who haven't got out of them yet, and what educational institutions are lumbermen's camps! Detroit Free Press: The Millerites have settled on the 20th of November as ascension day, but for men who expert to be in heaven on the 21st they hold hay and oats up wonder fully stiff and want their cash down. Mrs. Joaquin Miller is still follow ing her erratic hushand in an indirect but thor.,uebly tfiective nmanner, and the doo tced nI~au aves his re;uuutt.io.1 for gall.;ntry an;d colnru,,mn ye~ :e by refusing to !,lve any thing to eay about her.