Perth Amboy evening news. [volume], December 15, 1916, LAST EDITION, Page 26, Image 26

About Perth Amboy evening news. [volume] (Perth Amboy, N.J.) 1903-1959

Image provided by: Rutgers University Libraries

                
THE
GLOBE
Offers Great Xmas Gift Values
For The Man
The gift expresses your taste as well as your good will. In this
store, all preliminary selecting has been done for you by an expert
who understands men's desires and tastes; an organization at your ser
vice which has gathered the best to lay before you. And we'll help
you select from our selection. Ours is a most comprehensive assem
blage of high class, fashionable, trustworthy, merchandise for men ever
gathered in this city, carefully priced on the basis of intrinsic value.
What better gift to man than a Suit or Over
coat? Here's our Holiday offer—A Globe $20.00 Suit
or Overcoat At
t
Christmas Gift Specials For Him·
Blanket Batli Robes, Special at
$7.00
! Silk Suspenders in Xmas Box 50c and $1.00
.
Gold Filled Vest Chains, warranted 10 yrs.. Spec. $1.00
Leather Belts with German Silver Initial Buckle;
Special $1.00
Combination Sets, silk garters and suspenders ...$1.00
Ψ
Combination Sets, silk socks, garters & armbands $1.00
Accordion Knitted Mufflers in Xmas Box. Special 65c
Six Initial Handkerchiefs in Xmas Box $1,00
Pure Silk Shirts; fine quality; in Xmas Box $5.00
Woven Madras Shirts; neat stripes and figures;
in Xmas Box $1.00 and $1.50
Flannel Pajamas in Xmas Box. Special at $1.00
Silk Xeckties in Xmas Box .... 25c, 50c, 65c and $1.00
1
Funny ôtori··.
"Ha, hal" said the Jovial man ax lie
•tapped an acquaintance on the back.
"I'm glad to eee you. I have one of
the funniest stories ou record, and you
an Just In H Hie."
"I don't care for It," was the candid
reply. "Ton eee, there la often a pa
thetlc side even to humor. I have Just
been oat with my architect, and he
showed me three of the funniest sto
flllinwv
Llf·'· Littl· Parversitiea.
There are many little perversities In
this life of ours. Doctors cannot boni
themselves. Dentists nearly always
have bad teeth. Undertakers rarely
die and never bury themselves. Edi
tors cannot edit themselves. Financial
authorities are always broke. Chefs
have no appetite. Tailors are always
poorly dressed. liarbers usually need a
shave. Bartenders seldom partake—
unless It be of a cigar, merely to keep
the shingles on the roof. There Is no
need to multiply Instances.—St Louis
Poet-Dispatch.
.éL _ i- _
H»r Compliment.
"Does your wife ever pay you any
compliments?" asked Frederick Jim
eon of his friend Benderley.
"Never," replied Benderley.
"Well, mine dots; she flatters me."
"Often?"
"Oh, yee, frequently—particularly in
winter," replied Frederick.
"Why does she flatter you so much
in winter?"
"Whenever the coal Are needs replen
ishing she points to the fireplace and
says, "Frederick, the grate.' "—Loudon
ιan.
LIFE'8 crucible.
It WM (aid of Diderot that In
hla Invariable optlmlam he wai
Ilka one of tha old alchamleta,
who alwaya found gold In hla
cruoible becauee he had «rat put
It there. That la what the wiaa
man, tha Inetruoted aoul, learna
to do, for life conaieta alwaya of
what we oureelvee put Into It.
No Troubla at All.
"I don't eeo how you got that boy to
take the castor oil."
"Eaey enough. I told him to try
Home first and see ho .τ he liked It and
if he didn't like It be needn't take it."
—Life.
Tommy Kntw.
"Tommy," «aid the teacher, "how do
they ascertain the measurement of a
Twseir
"I guess they measure It with * nary
yard," was the unexpected reply.—Chi
cago New·,
mm wèêbèêêL· ■
Framing «η Exeua·.
Little Boy—rieaae, Mrs. Grumpy,
mother want· to know li you will leiid
her your washtub.
Mra. Grumpy (gruffly)—No; I can't.
The hoops arc off, the bottom's out aud
lt'a full of water.—Glasgow Times.
Kindly Precaution.
"Our doctor Is cuuslJerate, to say
the least."
"How so ?"
"Always examines you for heart
trouble before he render· his bill."—
Pittsburgh Post.
ttjam
Superfluous.
Teacher—Thomas, mention a few ol
the proofs that the earth Is round Ilka
an orange. Tommy Tucker—I didn't
know we had to have any proof·,
ma'am. I thought everybody admitted
It.—Exchange.
Speaking Truth.
Speaking truth Is like writing fall
and comej only by practice. It ta leM
» matter of will than of habit, and I
floubt if any occasion can to· trivial
which permits the practice and fornuk
rvut of aacb a habit-Buaklu.