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PERTH AMBOY EVENING NEWS PuMlah.ll Dully .xcuj>t Sunday at J«fr»r»un Stroat coru.r ot Madl. n A.tnua, Pert) Ambov N J by tba PJCpm AM Hut EVENING NEWS COMPANY Tel.pft. rm 4''H-4«I 401 J LOGAN CLEVENGER Editor D. P OLMSTEAD G.n«ral Manager Subaoriptton Price by mall. Including ptaiaga and war inn. 1 month. *5 centa. jr«fi |f Entered at Poat Office at Perth Amooy. N J.. aa aecond claaa mall matter. Branch Office—New Pork. F. R. Northrop, 303 Fifth Avenue; Chicago, Suit 1119 Akaociatlot. Building. __ Communication* The Sve.iln., New* la aiwaya glad fo receive communication* from Ita readers out lettere la car dad for publication must be reaaonaMa »n length and muat be aiffnc Of the name and address of *he writer. If requested the name will not be publish** unless personalities are Indulged in._ _ Member of The Associated Press The Associated Press Is exclusively entitled to the use for publication of all new dispatches cradltad to it or not otherw se credited In This paper and also the Iocs new* publl ed herein. M _ ... . Tha Evening New* is also a member cf tba American Newspapers Publishers Asaoclstlon and the Audit Bureau of Circulation.___ I COW PATHS AND HIGHWAYS Many of the principal streets in the older municipalities and the main highways throughout the country were once mere cow paths or Indian trails. They wound about in and out among the trees and rocks following a course where the travel was easiest. As the settlers came they, too, fol lowed in the same course because Hie path hud already been broken. But when the earls, wagons and coaches came along il ► was necessary to have more room. Instead of opening [ new roads, the old paths were simply widened. Thus farms [ and finally settlements were established along these high ways and, except for the increase in traffic and laying per manent pavements, they are about the same today as they were in the beginning. The time has come, however, when there has got to be some radical change. Cow paths and Indian trails, even il they have been made a trifle wider and given a hard surface, will no longer suffice. It is safe to say that traffic on the main highways of the country has increased more during the last fifteen or twenty years, since the advent of the automobile, than it increased altogether from the time the Indians blazed the way until the horseless carriages appeared. Just as the trail was not wide enough for the ox cart, so the road which served so admirably for the stage coaches and horse-drawn vehicles is no longer wide enough for the unlnm nhilo fNlfflfl flf fftflflV. While a great improvement could be brought about in eliminating some of the numerous curves in the highways that cause the traveler to go ten miles to get six, the most imperative demand of the age is that the roads be made wider. When it is realized that the highways today, with all the tremendous automobile traffic, are practically the same width as they were after they were first widened in order to change them from bridle paths to accommodate the [primitive vehicles of a century ago, we can appreciate the * necessity of drastic action in this regard. The federal government has just appropriated $<o, 000,000 to be divided among the states with the proviso that the states duplicate the amount, for the building ot improved highways. It would be a crime to have all this vast sum of money spent on roads no wider than are the LfeeSt^Tffffimity of those now in use. The little, narrow ^ribbon of concrete or bituminous material that now extends all over the country connecting the various municipalities, is less adequate for the traffic of the present day than were the cow paths for the colonists. In planning to rebuld the road between Metuchen and New Brunswick, for instance, the Board of Freeholders, who nropose to act for the state in this particular job, should see that this pavement is made much wider than at present. 1 he State Highway Commission should insist that, as the stale, will eventually pay for the pavement, it should be of a width sufficient to care for the enormous traffic on that particular stretch of highway—traffic that is constantly increasing. Nothing less than the width of the Lincoln Highway as it is paved through Rahway will suffice and even that will soon be outgrown for sooner or later some special provision will have to be made for a separate highway for trucks. That six mile stretch of highway between Metuchen and New Brunswick is particularly congested because of the bridge across the Raritan river to which it is the ap proach. Once the traffic reaches New Brunswick there is the choice of two or three routes to continue on across the state iherebv relieving the roads beyond New Brunswick. And once the cars reach Metuchen they can separate by either following the Lincoln Highway to Rahway or coming to Perth Amboy. But the road between Metuchen and New Brunswick must carry it all. Nothing short ot a pavement wide enough to carry four cars abreast should be considered for this section. . Wider highways in me coumrj anu »mn ... • >. cities are absolutely necessary for modern needs. Better build fewer miles of pavement and have what is laid wider than to follow the old policy. City streets with automobiles sharked along the curb are so congested even today that it rtToften difficult to get through. Take Madison avenue in Perth Amboy, for example. This street, under ordinary circumstances, would be a fairly wide thoroughtare. It is as wide as anj'one would think of making a street a few \ ears ago. Yet, today, with automobiles parked on both sides there is hardly room for two cars to pass in the middle. Any new street to be opened that is likely to carry heavy traffic ought to be as least seventy-five feet wide; 100 feet would be better. Modern traffic demands it. _ This question of the width of highways is of supreme importance. To go on building roads as we have been build ing them in the past is a waste of the people’s money. Every vears finds more aud more vehicles on the highways. It is an age of speed, also, as well as heavy trucking. While there is no desire to make speeding easier, there is a desire to make travel safer and the only way it can be made safer is to make the roads wider. PAYMENT Germany signs an agreement with France, to deliver $1,800,000,000 worth of building materials. That is the way Germany will ultimately pay her in demnity. Allies have the gold craze and want Germany’ to pay in gold. But there isn’t enough gold in the world to permit that. French makers of building materials will suffer from the flood of German goods. War is always a loss, even to the victor. i i NEIGHBORHOOD NEWS il _ IT WAS A GooD thm'Ig JIimmtJohes Had > A fifTT YASD STARToH HER WHE^ M*S. CASEY EoUHD oUr WHY ^ul. THE SooT was ComiHG OUT WTo the Room. HASKIN TELLS OF FEMININE FINANCE Daily Letter by Frederic 3. Haskin new YORK CITY, Nov. 16.— With business in its present wilted state, many women now face the harrowing necessity of maintaining the family's usual standard of liv ing upon a greatly reduced income. This is a task obviously requiring much skill and careful thought. It cannot lie successfully performed in haphazard fashion. The welfare oi the family, and in a large part the stability of the nation, depend upon the ability of Us women folk to spend money judiciously. In recognition of this fact, sev eral New York banks are preparing to open home savings departments In charge of experts, who will assist depositors in the wise disbursement I of their incomes. Advice on all household matters will be furnished from the respective merits of cuts of meat to the proper amount for Willie's weekly allowance. House hold budgets, cut and arranged to .suit the needs of individual fami lies, also will be provided. In order to train experts for these new bank positions, thd Department of Finance of the New 1 ork L ni versity lias opened a cours ■ known as "Management of Personal In come" in which a large number of business woir.t n are enrolled. It is taught by Miss Elizabeth Hallam Bohn, a well known linance lec turer and household management expert. "Women are more and more be ing called upon to give linaneial counsel to their own sex." said Pro fessor Bohn, in discussing the new course. "America stands today in the position in which all qf her economic problems must be solved through thritt. Pioneers in this held must teach her sons and daughters the lull and solemn truth of this fact, and unless they gain a deep and sincere appreciation of the necessity of thrift wo cannot hope to hold the position we occupy as flag bearer of the nations. "Hiving within one's means is not enough. This would simply keep the wolf from th door l'or the time being. The business that simply comes out even in this way at the end of the year would be quickly termed a failure. “Every woman should keep a budget, whetner she is a home mak er or a business woman. The first item in this budget should be sav ings. 1 figure that a man with a family of five earning a salary of $200 a month should put away at least 7 1-2 r -i rent, of it as savings. If he earns but $150 he should save at least 8 1-2 per cent. If he is earning only $100 a month he still must save, even if it is only a dol lar a week. The expenditures must be guided by the incomes. “Every housewife should have a budget, and as the house is her business no interference from her husband as to the running of it should be tolerated. "If the husband in his business decides that ho needs a new type writer, he buy; it without question If the wife desires a vacuum cleaner or a washing machine, she is very apt to talk it over with her husband and frequently it is decided that they can't afford It. "Now if the wife has a budget she can find a way to buy' these appli ances. and put more in the savings bank at the end of the year, be cause of the saving in wage s for help that she has made.” After properly distributing her in come on paper, tile next problem of the housewife is to see that She gets her money’s worth for each expenditure. The home-saving ex perts will aid her in doing this. If her income be small, they will urge her to buy food direct from the city markets or from chain stores. They will coac h leer in buying textiles, so that she will perceive the difference betwe en all-wool and shoddy and ad vise her in purchasing furniture, so that she may know the genuine from the imitation. Experience has shown that thrift is often particularly lacking in fam ilies of the upper middle classes, where the income is substantial. Thus, in a case brought to the at tention of a pioneer home-savings expert not long ago, a man whose income averaged $800 a month com plained that his family was unable to have anything and that it often ran into debt The home savings expert went over his list of house hold expenses and immediately saw that a large part of his salary was going to servants, five being employ ed to do the work of a compara tively small household. She advised him to discharge these five and em ploy two in their place, which ef fected a saving of over $2G0 a month • Women ignorant of Money According to this home savings expert the ignorance of women on financial matters is sometimes ap palling. In one case in which she was personal'y interestyd, for exam ple, h. young woman acquaintance from a small town in the northern part of the state came to New York as a bride and went to live in an attractive apartment on Riverside Drive. Shottly afterward, her hus nand was compelled to go to Canada on a business trip. The home sav ings expe-t chanced to pay her first call on the couple the day that he had departed and found the young . bride sobbing violently. J, "Come, now. don't cry," soothed the good lady, putting a maternal arm around the girl. “Of course, you will miss him—” “I shan't,' replied the bride, cry ing harder than ever. “I shan’t miss him a bit. He has done a ter rible thing, and I will never, never forgive him." By degrees, the home savings ex pert learned from the tearful bride that her husband had gone away without leaving her any money. The situation appeared serious. I reminded him just before he left,” explained the young wife, "and he said he had left a check for me on the desk. He did leave the check, but he neglected to fill it out. Oh!"—there she wept vio lently again) ”T know he did it de liberately." The home savings expert walked over to the desk and picked up the guilty check, looked hard at it, and then burst out laughing. "You don't deserve such a hus band, my dear,” she declared. "You really should be ashamed of your self. Here the good man has left >ou a perfectly nice signed check 'and trusted you to fill in the amount yourself.” On the whole, though, this wom an believes, women of the simple doll type are growing very rare. The majority of madern women, she says take great pride in their own capa bility. show much skill in manag ing their finances, and seldom al low tflemselves to get the worst of a bargain. SUFFICIENT SLEEP COMMON SENSE WAYS TO KEEP WELL Sleep, In sufficient quantity to | thoroughly repair the wornout tis sues every twenty-four hours, is one of the prime requisites given by many authorities for a long life. The number of hours required for sleep for an adult varies from six to ten. according to the tempera no nt, vigor, duties and mental con dition of the person. Many say that women need more sleep than men. It is claimed by some that persons who think and work fast will sleep more in an hour than slow people and thus require fewer hours for rest. This is false and absurd reasoning. Persons of active, energetic, high ly nervous temperament do not build up more readily than others and by great activity of mental force added ! 'o all they do, wear out more rapid ly. hence require more sleep—not less than eight hours, and some as many as ten. They may seem to require less be J cause they are so much interested in whatever claims their attention, that liter a moderate amount of sleep | they find it easy to be wide awake. Knergetlc people need not be afraid of sleeping too much. Per sons who feel uncomfortable after Sleeping may generally truce their unpleasant feelings to other causes than to too much sleep, which may have been heavy because of an un healthy condition of the blood, want of ventilation or obstructed circula tion from improper clothing or posi tion. IN'o one should become so fatigued by work of muscle or brain that a good night’s rest will not follow and afford complete recuperation. It is important to have several hours’ sleep before midnight and bet ter to sleep during the shades of night than when the sun bids all to be astir, yet it is better to take a nap during the day than not to sleep enough. Indeed, a little nap before the noon meal will rest the nerves and promote digestion. Do not sleep just after eating, as it retards digestion. Stimulants of any kind should not be resorted to in the hope of gaining strength. An increase of vigor can only be had from the nutritive particles in the blood, which were obtained frofn the food previously eaten and has been oxygenized by contact with good air in the lungs and by the rest which sleep affords. 'BertonBraleyS Daily Poem This World ... Take it by and large, and ail in all This world is pretty decent to a guy. Of course sometimes the graft is kind of small And Kjtti quite often bangs you ill ttie eye; But mostly you can sort of wriggle by, And Bady Buck will hear you when you call— Take it by and large, and all in all. At times it seems you're up against a wall With not a chance to climb, it, it's so high; But if you keep your gumption and your gall You'll tind a wav to scale it, when you try. It won't get you nothing if you and bawl. For folks won’t listen to a quitter's cry; But—take it by and large, and all in all— This world is pretty decent, to a guy. There's always those who'll help you when you fall. Unless you squeal and whimper where you lie (Man ain't no worm that’s meat to cringe an’ crawl); There’s friends who will be faithful till you die, There's love to fill you with a glory high; There's work an' play—a gink is pretty small Who crabs about the game, his nerve is shy. Don't listen to him when he makes his squall. For, take it by and large and all in all. NEWSHOLME SEES DRY LAW A BENEFIT TO U. S. BY Mlt/TOX BRUNNER LONDON, Nov. 3 9.—Prohibition in America was not gained by a trick but by the considered opinion of the American people. In spite of ail evasions, It has been a success, it has come to stay. Great Britain will have to travel far In America's footsteps If she wants to recover quickly from finan cial embarrassments and hold her own lt» the struggle for national ef ficiency. These are the carefully expressed views of a medical scientist who Is himself not a teetotaler—Sir Arthur Newsholme. one of the most distin guished physicians in England. For years he was principal medical officer to the local government board of England which Is something like being physician to the whole nation. For the past two years he has been in America lecturing at Johns Hop kins University on public health ad ministration. and on child welfare for the children’s bureau of our United States government. Writing a Book. He Is embodying his researches into the prohibition question in a booklet, “Prohibition in America." shortly to be issued in London. "Englishmen who base their opin ion as to prohibition in America on what they read in tluir papers,” said he, “would be astonished were they made to realize the revolution which prohibition has made In the United States. The Instances of failure to enforce it, which figures so largely in cabled Information, convey an en tirely erroneous impression. “It is a majority of the American people themselves who. after elabo rate votings n^i checkings, have de cided to rule the alcohol-loving mi nority with a rod of iron. "Ureat Britain ere long will be compelled to travel far in American footsteps if she wants to keep up in the race. • "It is too early to draw sweeping conclusions from what on© sees In the United States,( but facts and fig ures all point in one direction—in creasing sucress for the dry cause. Few Can Get It. "Although in many instances state and city authorities have not helped enforce the laws, probably not 10 per cent of former drinkers can now secure alcoholic beverages. "Although liquor is smuggled in from Canada. Mexico and other points and although there Is ijllclt manufacture and home manufacture, yet you have the undoubted fact that all the breweries and distilleries and tens- of thousands of saloons are closed. "Of 153,000 physicians In the Unit ed States, four out of every five have refused to make applications for permits to prescribe alcohol and in 31 states—half of the union—not a single physician has taken out such a permit. "I know there are always out cries about Infringement of personal liberty. But people forget that com pulsion is a necessary element in government. "Prohibition is not a habit of mind with Americans, but a means to se cure liberation from a great slavery: and if the will of the people remains constant, then America will have successfully carried through the boldest and most momentous experi ment in social reform which the world has known." | THE SWITCH ENGINE BY DR. W. E. BARTON I sometimes travel, and I spend many nights subject to the tender mercies such as they be of the Pull man Company. And I sometimes wake in the night when the train hath reached a junction. And it happeneth often that a switch engine conjeth up behind and catcheth hold of two or three cars and runneth away with them as though ft were an automobile bandit. And it puffeth and it snort eth and it goeth last, but it goeth not far. For presently it runneth upon a side-track and leaveth a sleeper. And then it runneth over to another side track and pic-keth up a sleeper. And sometimes it cutteth out a Chair car, or taketh on a diner. And these operations doetb it perform with commendable industry, and no un due modesty. For it saith as it snorteth about— It is up to me to make up this train in twenty minute3. and behold it ran in live minutes late, and the old man will be red in the face if he pull not out on time; therefore must I get busy, and cut out two cars and set in three, and what happeneth unto the train after that belongeth not unto me, and I should worry. Now this process fooleth the in experienced traveler. For he hear eth the snorting, and feeleth the rapid motion, and he saith. behold, new are wo going some. And just then his car bumpetb up against the Cedar Kapids sleeper, and driveth sleep from his eyes and slumber from his eyelids. But this process fooleth not me. When the train stoppeth in the' night, and we start up suddenly and with Rapid motion and with much snorting of the engine, then know X that we are running down into the yards with two or three cars, to pick up a sleeper from Oshkosh, or to leave one for Oconomowoc. And I prepare for the bump. Now there be good men who come to me to promote good causes. And there be some who hook onto every new movemdht that pulleth into the I'nion Depot, and haul it up and down the main line and the adjacent sidings, and with much puffings an nounce the near arrival of the Mil lennium, And these be useful men. I know not how without them we should make up our trains or organization and .achievement. But I am not whdily fooled by the whoop and hur rah: neither do I altogether deceive myself with the initial speed of these divers and sundry enterprises. I know that as yet we are not out of the yards, and that when we real ly get going, and to pulling freight, it will be with a more solemn and sedate evidence of progress than is advertised when we are only picking up the sleeper from Kalamazoo. For the switch engine, though it be a worthy and industrious and commendable factor in human prog ress, is not that which furnisheth the sustained power for the long grade and the steady pull. Wherefore, when a good cause is starting, I applaud the speed with which wre get under way, but I wait for the steadier and slower pull that doth certify that we are out on the main line, and actually moving to ward our destination. Learn One New Thing Every Day BULLETINS BY THE NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC SOCIE TY THE GOLD FLOOD OP 1921. lno uoou oi goiu into wio uinicu States, which ebbed somewhat after reaching its peak in 1317, has set in again and there is now probably a greater supply of this precious metal in the country than at any other time in its history. This flow and what the present stock of gold in the United States means in terms of world supply is the subject of a bul letin issued from the Washington, D. C. headquarters of the National Geographic Society. "Gold, the aristocrat of metals, is truly cosmopolitan,” says the bulle tin, "and is found to a greater or less extent in every part of the world from near the equator In Africa, Peru and Borneo to the frozen ground of Alaska, Finland and Si beria. Since the beginning of history and doubtless long before any rec ords were made gold has largely typified ‘the world's desire,’ and it is the only substance which has been received by all races and peoples in exchange for other property and services. It was In truth, therefore, long before legislation by practically every civilized country made it for mally so, the world’s standard of value. . , Pouring in From 30 Countries. “In the early months of 1321 gold •eached the United States from about thirty different countries. Much of this gold doubtless originated In the i nited States, and there was among it no doubt metal from practically every source of gold known to the world. For the gold of the world constitutes practically a single stock held temporarily in many reservoirs; and as exchange rates and other eco nomic and financial conditions change, it flows freely back and forth and across along trade routes, wearing a veritable golden web tjing the nations together. "It is not at all improbable that some of the gold that is pouring in on the shores of the United Slates first left this hemisphere in Spanish galleons after it was lorn from the Icmples of the Incas by the Spanish i ’onquistadores. Another part may have rested once in the treasuries of the Great Moguls; while it is gold fresh from the mines of Australia, the Klondike, or the Hand lor sside from that which is absorbed in the art or is lost or nsed in industry, practically all gold these days finds its way to the pots of the assa>er and goes to make up pawns in the worm a iraue. "Of what inay be called the rela tively common metals, fairly close estimates of the quantity in existence can be made probably only for gold and silver. Even for these two met als satisfactory estimates of produc tion can be made only for the pe riod since the discovery of Ameri ca. There is nothing on which to base an idea of the gold produced before 1492. but it is safe to assume that because of the few sources and the primitive mining methods the quantity in treasuries and circulation at that time was but a small fraction of the quantity since produced. Nearly 30,000 Tons of Gold. “Since Columbus landed In Amer ica, according to statistics assembled by the Director of the Mint, the world production of gold through 1919 amounted to more than three quarters of a billion Troy ounces. The estimated amount is the equiv alent of 29.448.92 tons of the prec ious metal. occupying 49,100.85 cubic feet, and worth more than sev enteen and three-quarter billions of dollars. “This tremendous volume of gold must be measured by a bigger unit than the gold dollar if its magnitude is to be appreciated. If gold were cast in gigantic ‘dollars’ one foot thick and having a diameter of ap proximately IS feet 9 inches, each uould weight 165.85 tons and would be worth $100.000.000. The world gold production since 1492 would make 177 such 'dollars’ and leave more than half enough for another. If stacked, therefore, these gargan tuan coins would form a tower 18 feet 9 inches in diameter, more than 177 feet high. Since 1905 the av erage annual world production would have added about four and a half of these ‘dollars’ to the stack each year, but in 1918 and 1919, the latest two years for which statistics are complette. the output, would have made less than four of the $100,000,000 pieces each year.” MISS RETTA DEATS Electrical Scalp and Face Massage Derma Plasta and lloneilla Massage Office hours Mon..Wed.. FrL 1-6 P. M. Tues.. Thurs.. Sat. 1-8 P. M. Board of Trade Bldg.. Room 214 Phone 1644 Perth Amboy. N. J. — ' ■— ■■ 1 s Perth Amboy 1 rust Co. “A Good Bank to Be With” '* DEPARTMENTS \ Commercial Trust Safe Deposit Spt'ial Interest fP Foreign Real Estate fl 4% ON SPECIAL ACCOUNTS - / \ Ij - II Questions-Answers ^ Any feeder can gel the gnawer te 'I any question by writing The Perth j Amboy Kvening Newe Information I llur.au. Frederic J. Hacklo. Director, Weehington. D. C. Thle offer ap i pllaa atrlctly to Information. The 1 bureau cannot give advice on legal, medicinal and financial troublea It doea not attempt to eettle domeattc ! troublea. nor to undertake exhaua I tlve reaearch on any eubject. Wrlta j your question plainly and briefly. Olive full name end addreae and on eloee two cente In etnnmpa for return i I poetega. All rcpllao are sent direct | to the Inquirer, | Q. How many people are there in the United States over 21 years of age?—G. K. A. A. There are 60,886,520 people in the United States over 21 years of age. Of these, 31,403,370 are men and 29.18.1.150 are women. The total number of citizens 21 years of age and over 's 54,421,832, this num ber being made up of 27,661,880 men and 26,759,962 women, and comprising all native persons and all naturalized foreign-born persons. Q. How art bayberry candles made?—J. U. W. A. The berries are collected from the bayberry bush and boiled in pails of water. The wax rises to the top, is skimmed off. and boiled again Itegular candle wicks are cut the desired length, attached to a-rod dipped'in waim water, then dipped into the pall of wax several times, allowing the wax to harden between times. The wax should be kept Just warm enough to be in a liquid state. I Q. ' What is a disease called a where the hair falls out?—L. K. A. A disease characterized by loss of hair is known as elopecla. Q. Is alligator flesh lit to eat?— H. G. F. A. The flesh of alligators Is white and tender, but has a musky taste. It is eaten by Indians and occasionally by some other people. Q. What is meant by voicing a piano?—G. D. A. A. Voicing a piano Is the same i as tuning a piano. Q. Has there been a monument erected in Havana to the Battleship r rt r,.. '>_n a n A. In 1915 Cuban presidential decree authorized bids on the con struction of a monument to the me mory of the Battleship Maine, the total cost, not Including that of placing in position, to be $33,000. The site selected for the monument was in the Vedado on a triangular piece of ground, formed by streets, 17, 19, 0 and the Calzado de Vedado, The latter is a wide, paved avenue which skirts the sea through the most beautiful residential section. The spot is only 400 feet from the water, and may be seen from all ships approaching and leaving the harbor. For some unaccountable i eason, however, the project has not yet been carried to completion, and to date the monument has pot been placed in position. Q. What does the word Alps mean?—H. D. S. A. The word Alps is of uncer tain origin. Some trace it to the Celtic word alb meaning high, oth ers to the Batin albus meaning white. By the residents of these mountains the term is used only as meaning the grassy benches or pla teaus found abundantly at various M high altitudes which in summer af- I ford pasturage for cattle. In general ’ usage the word includes peaks, alps, and valleys. Q. What was the Florence Night ingale pledge-'—J. G. A. This is the nurses pledge: "I solemnly pledge myself before God and in the presence of this as sembly to pnsa my life in purity and to practice my' profession faithfully. I will abstain from whatever is de leterious and mischievous, and I will not take or knowingly admin ister any harmful drug. I will do all in my power to elevate the stan dard of my profession and will hold in confidence all personal matters committed to my keeping, and all family affairs coming to my knowl edge in the practice of my calling. W'ith loyalty will I endeavor to aid the physician in his work and de vote myself to the welfare of those committed to my care." - Mr. Hughes to the line, let the ships fall where they may. , These mail robbers never seem to ^ take any ‘'Please Remit" billa. Among the wild movements on foot we have modern dances. The small boy hopes school stops ten years for this big naval holiday. Generally speaking, some people arc. Some women get divorced and live happily ever after—another man, Chicago children being fed sheep glands may get fleeced. Lots of people ought to be glad they are anywhere. There are two Watsons In the Senate, but only one a detective. Have you noticed the Increase lr beauty contests since women vote? Just when China's outlook wat bright a missionary sails for there with a motorcycle. Coffee is unhealthy. A man has killed his wife with a percolator. Real prohibition is the price. Don't censure a man for leaving during church until you learn If ho walks in his sleep. The pen Is mightier than the fine. Men have strong will power, hut women have stronger won't power. It must he awful for a grouch to have nothing to kick about. When a girl wins a prize at a beauty show she marries him. This last war may continue to bei our last one. These days, it is hard to laugh at jour own expense. Kx-Imp. Wilheim is getting in (^j debt to Holland. Doesn’t that beat the Dutch? Gasoline is great to clean; it leave* the pocketbook so lean. —.. * - * «s *2