The Kalida venture. [volume], May 16, 1845, Image 1

About The Kalida venture. [volume] (Kalida, Ohio) 1841-1865

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E K A LI B A V E S-;T U
Equal Laws Equal Rights, and Equal Burdens The Constitution and it Currency.
' -v.
VOL. V. NO. 13.
KALIDA, PUTNAM COUNTY, OHIO, FRIDAY, MAY 10, 1815. v
H
POETRY,
The Lcvclcn
, i BT BAERT CORNWALL.
The king he reigns on I throne of gold,
Fenced round by his right div'ne;
' The baron he aits in his castlp old,
Drinking hia ripe and red wine:
But below, below, in his ragged coat,
The beggar tunetli a hungry note.
And the apinner ii bound to hie weary thread,
And the debtor lira down with an aching head.
So the world goes.
So the etream flows;
' Yet there's a follow whom nobody knows,
Who maketh all free,
'On land and sea,
And maketh tho rich, like poor, to flee.
he lady lies down in her warm white lawn
And dreams of her painted priili ;
The milk maid sings to tho wild-eyed dawn,
Sad songs on tho cold hill's side:
And the bishop smiles, as on high he sits.
On the scholar who writes and stnrrs bv fits;
And the girl who her nightlv needlo plica,",
Looks out for the source of life, and dies.
So the world goes,
' So the stream flows;
Yet there's a follow whom nobody knows,
Who maketh all free,
By lnnd and sea.
And forccth the rich and poor tn fler;
MISCELLANY.
Almost nn Elc-pcmes'.
Wo mot an old friend ilu other day,
whom wo had not seen fur several nioiillis.
"John," said wo in the course t.f n convoca
tion with. him, " w!iy djii't yo i get married
and setlle down somewhere"-1
"Gel married and sottlo down, you said,"
John repeated with emphasis.
"Yes,"
" I came very near settling down without
getting married, a whilo ago."
"How's that?"
" No matter I don't like to tell sscrots
to u editor."
" But in confidence, you know, John.
Come, out with it."
" Wont you tell?"
"No."
"Now I know you will; but pledge mo
that my name shall not go with it "d you
shall have tho story, and may tell it as itilc'i
us you please."
We pledged our" sacred honor," and John
threw away his cigar and commenced.
Here some two or threo months ago, I
happened into one of the prettiest little villa
ges you ever set your eyes upon "
" What was its unmet"
" That's my concern, and i'il m-wig-i it
Without your assistance. It was indeed a
beautiful village, with pretty Greets, pretty
houses, pretly gardens, pro 1 1 y fenced, pretty
everything and among oilier things, jnrUij
women. Tho latter, you know, I naturally
tako a liking to; and of course I was not
displeased when" a kind of fifteenth cousin,
whom I called on during a short stay there
on business, strictly invited mo to make
his house my home for a fortnight or s:, while
I went over the sporting grounds in the neigh
borhood, and killed all the boasts, birds and
witches that ran wild there. Hang mo if 1
didn't thank tho fellow with a full heart;
nnd I removed my little bundle of dollies
and other rukbisli to' his house iu double
quick time.
Well, I had been there threo or four days,
and had been sunning everv day, without so
much as killing a woodpecker or tree toad,
when one day, in crossing a pieco ot open
ground surrounded entirely with woods, 1
discovered, not a little to my surprise, the
prettiest girl I had ever seen in my whole
life. From her appearance, I fudged at once
she had lost her way, and prepared mysplf
immediately to perform a true p ecc ot gal
lanlrv. ' So walking straight up to her, I com
municated mv sitsDicions vci'v nolilrlv, and
enquired if I could tender any us-s's'anco,
Sho replied that she had lost tier way m
attempting to sret through the wood by an
obscure path, and would be very much obli
ged if 1 led her into the main mail, or poun
out to her the direction in which it lay.
Awav we started together. On tho way we
chatted about every thing we could think of
(except Iter pretty sell, wii;cn i was uiiiik'u'
of continually,) for she was sociable as an Id
school-mate, and even told mo her name, the
nanwof her father, nnd the names of a half
a dozen brothers and sis'eis whom 1 had
never seen nor did not care to see.
When we got into the road, she pointed
out her father's house, whrch was in s'ght,
and was going to thank me for my servxes
but I stopped her by saying that it would be
very little out of my way to see her home,
and I would preter to do so. All tno way
there, we chatted nnd laughed, and told
tones, and even jokes; nnd by the lime we
parted at tho gate of old Deacon B 's
farm-house, I could have sworn wo were old
acquaintances. I loft her, " hoping to see
her again, sometime," and she left me, " hop
ing to learn of my safe arrival at home."
The next Sabbath I met hor at church
the next Monday evening at a village party
and escorted her home the next i ritlay
called on her accidentally' the next Sun
day evening by permission: in two weeks 1
was ' in lve' and in four I was tho nexi
move td the biggest fool that ever grew out
of natural philosophy. Three times I popped
the question; but she would not say yes or
no, or even hint that sno would or would not
seal mv happiness. The fourth timo she
looked very grave, hung down her head
sighed, and even, I mistrusted, shed tears.
Shall I ask the consent of your futhert"
the question on which Imng my
" That would never do," she nnswored
with a sigh; " he would never consent, to my
marriage with yon, I know ho would not."
I m'struslod from this tint she herself had
broached tho sul ji cl to the Deacon, and had
got a fl it refusal of his consent to tho match.
I Walked homo that evening in much d-strcss,
passed a restless night at my cousin's house,
nnd rose the next mini ng with mvhead foil
of pains and dark foreboding. My cnus'ti
rallied me on my dull appearance, and I
determined at nnco to tell h'm tho secret of
my (roubles and ask his advice. I accor
dingly accompanied him to his little grocery,
and when there, unravelled the whole matter
as to n brother.
"That Ellen B ," said ho when T had
concluded," is the greatest coquette in the
country or the wot Id, and I advise you to
keep your love matters to yomself, when
yen are in her company. If j hr-d mistrusted
you were at all tender, I should have told
you of this before, but ns it turns out, I
advise you now lo let her alone." I did not
make tiny reply, but really thought my
eotis'n the biggest fool in Christendom.
Had she. not kept mv company and said
soft things to me and blushed, and grieved
and s:ghcd, when I popped 1h question for
tho fourth timet The next evening I called
on Ellen again she was alone, nnd seemed
twice as beautiful as ever. For tho "fifth
time, I offered her my hand. Sho came
very near fiinling away, hut would not
answer me yes or no. What could the mat
ter be! Of course I attributed the whol.i to
the obstinacy of ihe drincon, her father and
being more than half crazy beliveen love for
her anil hatred for him, it w'll scarcely be
wondered at that before leaving, I si'i'gos'od
lo her that if we couldn'l he happy wiih his
eons. uit. we had n perfect right to proceed
without it. Wo could take a rido some
even'ng,' said I;go to tho d'-pot take
the main train of ors nnd in two hours be
man and w'f;.' ' When would you call fir
nn V sho asked. ' To-motrow night.' I
rrpl't'd tilnarst wild with delight, 'Eight
o'chek.' 'Well,' said she lifter a pause,
' I w'll he hete.'
The next rvr n'ng, at half past seven, the
village stal le keeper drove a carriage lo my
door, as hn had agreed to, at half an hour
before. Just ns I wis s'cpp:ng into the car
riage, a litib hoy handed me a note. I
Mimed into the house a moment to road it.
The contents run cfer this sort;
" My Dear Mr. S : I have consulted
with tny filhsr about running away with
vou to-n:ght, and ho thinks tho air is so
lamp I should certainly take cold. He sug
gests that it would answer all reasonable
purposes for you to run awav alone. But I
hope yon w'll not do this till you have ac
complished ihe intention you expressed on
vour atrival in our village, which was, I be
lieve, before you left it, lo make a conques
of the heart of the prettiest gill within ten
miles. lours as truly us ever,
Ellr B ."
I immediately recollected having foolishly
expressed ihs foolish intention a day or two
after mv arrival in the Village, to an old
friend who accompan'ed inn there on busi
ness with snmo of the merchants. I recol
lected, too, that the remark was ma do while
w. were on a walk through Hie village, thai
a lady was close behind us at tho time, and
my fric-nd, who saw her fxe, thought siie
must ho an angel. She turned out to be!
My horse was sent back to the stable, and
iho nexi morning I was leaving the beauti
ful v.lhge, and iho beantif.il Lllun, and my
fifteenth cousin and his hippy fmiily as fist
as steam would carry me."
BriACTiiCL ScrwisTiTioN. A beautiful
supeis'.itiou prevails among the Irish, that ho
who happ uis to find a four headed shamrock.
becomes possessed of tho magic power t:
gratify all his w s'.-cs in this life, by hs mere
command. Lover, the poet, in the huievo-
encc of Ins heart. h:s said that it ho were the
'ucky finder, he would use the power for
the good of mankind, in tlis wise:
" To worth he would give honor,
He'd dry the meurner's tears,
And to the pnlid lip recall
The smile of happ'er years;
And friends that had been long estranged.
And hearts that had been cold,
Should mret again like parted streams,
And mingle as of old.
And thus he'd use the enchanter's power,
To scatter miss around,
And not a tear or aching heart.
Should in the world be found."
Tho author of the " Curtain Lectures"
of which wo have republished one or two
is dead, lis name was La man iilanchard
and his contributions to tho London Punch
were among the best articles in that paper.
The " Curtain Lectures, wero written
whilst his wife was lving tit the point of death
and his heart was filled with affl'ction. So
it is. The reader who laughs over tho sal
lies of wit. liltla dreams that what excites
his mirth is ofieu wrung from a brain afH'ct
ed with despair. Bhinchard was of a most
amiable and free deposition, remarkable for
his social qualities, his companionable sp'rit
and great uealness of dress. And yet with
all these ho was unhappy, and in a fit ofde
lirium committed suicide by cutting his throat
Bait. Pat.
Tho deaih of David W. Dickinson, late
M. C. from Tennessee is announced in the
swer to
hopes.
Tennessee papers.
From the London Punoh.
Mrs. Candle's CrJitn I,crturcx
Mr Co vale, joins a Chi" Tlie Skylark.?:''
" I'm sure a poor wrman had betler be
in her grave than married! That is, if she
cani'i bo married to a decent man! No; I
don't care if you are tired, I shan't let you
go to sleep. No, and won't say what I
have to say in the morning; I'll say it now.
It's all very well for you to come homo at
whit time jonll'.e; it's now half past twelve;
and expect Pm to hold my tongue, and let
you go to sleep. What next, I wondert A
woman had belter be sold for a slave at
once.
"And so you've gone and joined a club!
The Skylarks, indeed! A pretty skylark
you'll make of yourself! But I won't stay
to bo ruled by you. No, I'm determined on
that. I'll go and ttiko the dear children,
and you may get who you like to keep your
house. That is, as long as you have a
house to keep, and that won't be long, I
know.
" How any decent man can go and Fpend
h's nights in a tavern! Oil, yes, Mr. Caudle;
1 d arc say you do, tor rational conveisatinn.
I should like to know how many of vou
would care for what you call rational con
versation, if you bad it without your filthy
brandy-and-water, ys, and your trove filthy
tobacco smoke. I'm sure the last time you
cam" home, I had ihe headache for a week.
But I know who it is who's taking you to
destruction. Ii's that brute Ptllv;r.au. Ho
las broken his own poor wife's heart, and
now ho wants tc but don't you , tb'nk it.
Mr. Caudle; I'd not have my peace of m:iui
les'royod by tho best man that ever trod.
Oh, yes! I knew you don't care ns long as
mi can appear well to all tne world; hut
lie world hula thinks hew you behave lo me.
It shall knew it though; that. I'm determined.
" How any man can leave his own hsppv
firesxe, logo and sit, and smoke, and drink,
and talk w in people who wouldn't, one cl
hem, lilt a finger to save hun from hanging;
low any turn can leave his wife, and a good
wife too, though I sav it, for a parcel of piif-
eonpanious, oh! it's disgraceful, Mr. Caudle;
i's unfeeling. No man who has the least
love for his wife could do it.
" And I suppose ibis to be the rase every
Sattndayf But I know what I'll do. I
now Ii's no use Mr. Caudle, you calling
mo a good creature: I'm not such a foci as
o be coaxed in that way. No, if you want
o go to sleep, you should come home in
Christian time, not at half past twelve
There was a 'imc when yotrwere as regular
at your fireside as a kettle. That was when
you were a decent man, and didn't go with
Heaven knows who, drnkmg and smoking.
and making what you think your jokes. I
never ieard any good come to a man who
cares about jokes. No respectable trades
man docs. But I know what I'll do: III
c?re away your Skylarks. The houso sells
iouor after twelve of a Saturday night; and
f I don't write to the msg'stralcs, and have
he license taken away, I'nvnot lying in this
bed this night. Yes, you may call me a
foolish woman; but no," Mr. Caudle, no; it's
vou who are tho foolish man; you're a
wcked one. If you were to die to-morrow,
nd the people who go to the public houses
lo nil they can to shorten the;r lives, I should
like to know who should wrte upon your
tombstone, " A lendnr husband and an
ftectionato faiher." I 1 U have no such
falsehoods told of you, I asrure you.
" Going nnd spending your money; and,
monsensc! don't tell me; no, if you were
lo ten times swear it. I wouldn't believe
that vou only spend eighteen pence, I
know better, I'm not quite a fool, Mr. Cau
dle. A great docl von could have tor IP
peuce! And all tho Club married men, and
fathers of families. The more shame for
em! Skylarks indeed! They should cull
themselves Vultures; for they can only do
as they alwavs do by robbing their innocent
wives and cludren. Ji.'g!itcen pence a wei-K :
And if it was only thai; do you know what
fiftv-two eighteen pences come to in a ycai "
I'm sure I can'i out of the house money, buy
mvself a pincushion ; though I've wanted one
ihr.so six months. JNo, not so niucn as a uan
of cotton. But what do you care, so you
can get vour brandv-and-watert There's
l ie lmiIs. ton tho things they wanti-
They're never dressed like othur peonh 's
children. But it's till the same to their fa
ther. Oh, yes! So ho can go with his Sky
larks they may wear sackcloth for pinafores,
and pack thread for gaiters
" You'd better not let that Mr. Prettyman
come here, that's all; or, rather you'd better
bring him once. Yes, I should like lo see
him. He wouldn't forget lU A man who,
I may s?v, lives and moves only in a spittoon
A man who has a pipe in his mouth us con
stant as his front teeth. A sort ot tavern
king, with a lot of fools, like you to laugh
at what be thinks his iokes, and give him
rntisonucnco. No. Mr. Caudle, no-; it's no
use your telling me to go to sleep, for I
won't. Go to sleep indeed! I'm sure its al
most time lo get up. I hardly know what's
tho use of coming to bed at all, now,
Tho Skylarks, indeed! I suppose you'll
bo buying a " Liille Warbler," aud at your
lima of life he trvin!? to sing. The peacocks
will sing next. A pretty name you 11 gel
in tho neighborhood, nnd, in a very little
iime. a nice fico vou'll have." Your nose is
getting reddor already; and you've just got
one ot the noses mat nquor mwaja u
You don't see it's redt No, I dare say not ;
but I see it; I seo a groat many things you
don't. And so you'll go on. In a little
I'me. with your brandy-and-water; don't tell
me that you only take two small glasses; I
know what men's two small g!a-ses are; in a
lililo time you'll have a face all over as if it
was made of red. current jam. And I should
like to know who's to endure you then ? I
won't, bo don'l think it. Don't come to me.
" N;co habits men learn nt Clubs!
Theie's Joskins; he was a decent creature
once, and now I'm told ho has more than
onee boxed his wife's ears. Hc'h a Skylark,
too. And I suppose some day youll be try
ing to box my carst Don't attempt it, Mr.
Caudlo. I say, don't attempt it Yes, it's
all very well for you to say you don't mean
o; but I only sny again, don't attempt it.
You'd rue it till the day of your death, Mr.
Caudle.
" Cn'ap and silling for four hours nt a
tavern! What men, unless they had their
wives with them can find lo talk about, I
can't think. No good, of course.
" Eightnn penco a week; end drinking
brandy-and-water enough to swim a boat!
And smoking like the funnel of a steam
ship! And I can't nfibrd myself so much
as a piece of tape! Ii's brutal, Mr. Caudle.
It's ve-vc-vc-ry hre-inl."
ITZrs. CaiM'c's Curtain Lectures.
Mr. Caudle has left to Greenwich Fair.
Hem! So, Mr. Caudle: I hope you
enjoyed yourself at Greenwich. I know
it ,eiy well sit: know all about it: know
mere than you think I know. I thought
i there was srmethinj in the wind. Ye3 1
'was sure of it when you went cut of the
house, to-day. I knew it by tho looks of
yon, though I didn't say anything. Upon
my word! And you call yourself a respec
table man, and the father of af.im'ly! Go
ing to a fair amongst all sorts of peoj 1 ,
at your time of life. Yis; and neer thinl.
of taking your wife with you. Oh no! you
can go and enjoy youisf lf nut, with I don'i
care who; go out and make yourself vetv
nleanaiit, I dare say. Don't tell me; I hear
what a nice companion Mr. Candle is: what
a good tempered poison. Ha! I only wish
peoplo could see you at homo, that's all:
But so it is with men they can keep all their
good temper for out-of-t.ocis their wive?
never see anv of it. Oh dear! I'm su:e I
don't know who'd be a poor woman !
" Now, Caudle, I'm not in an ill temper:
not at all. I know I used to be a fool when
we were first married: I used to worry and
fret myselt to death when you went out; but
I've pot over that. I wouldn't put myself
out of the way now for tho best man that
ever trod. For what thanks docs a poor
woman gel! None at all. No: it's those
who don't care for their families, who aie
the best tho't of. I only wish I could bring
myself not to care for mine.
" And why couldn't you say. like a man,
you weie going to Greenwich Fair when yon
went outf It's no use your saying that, Mr.
Caudle; don't tell me that you ciiJn't think
of going; you'd made your mind up to it,
and you know it. Pretty games you've had,
no doubt! I should like to have been
behind you, that's till. A man at your tune
of life!
" And I, of course; I never want to go
(.ut. Oh no ! J may stay home with the cat.
Yon couldn't think of taking your wife and
hildien, like any other decent man, lo a
fair. Oh no; you never care to be seen with
us. I'm sure, many people don't know
you're married; how can they t Your wife's
never seen with you. Oh no; anybody but
those belonging to you!
"Greenwich Fair, indeed! les, -and ot
course you went up and down the hill, run
ning and racing, with nobody knows wno.
Don't tell me; 1 know what you are when
you're out. You don't suppose, Mr. Caudle.
I've forgotten that pink bonnet, do yo:i t No :
I won t hold my tongue, and I'm not a looi
ish woman. Ii's no mailer, sir, if the pink
bonnet was fifty years ago it's ail the same
for that. No: and it 1 live lor hliy years to
conic, I never will leave off talking of it.
You ought to he ashamed ot yourself, Mr.
Cmidle. Ha! few wives would have been
what I've been to you; I only wish my time
was to come over again, that's all; I wouldn't
be the fool I have been.
"Going to a fair! and I suppose you had
your furlune told be the gypsiesf You need
iiot have wasted your money. I'm sure 1
can tell you your fortune, Mr. Caudle.
And it would bo no mallei none at all .(
your wifu and children didn't suffer with you.
if And you must go riding upon floiiKeys
you didn't go riding upon donkeys f les;
it's very well tor vou to sav so; but 1 dare
sav vou did. I tell yon, Caudle, I know
what vou are when you're out. 1 1 woiihln t
trust any of you men you especially, Caudle
"Thun yeu must go in the thick of the
fair, and have the girls scratching your coat
with rattles! You couldn't help it, if they
did scratch your coalf Don't tell me; peo
pie don't scratch coats unless, they're en
couraged to do it. And you must go in a
swine?, too. You didn't go in as wing t And
I'm a foolish woman to think so, am It
Well, if you didn't it was no fault of yours;
vou wished to go. I've no doubt.
And then you must go into the showst
There you don't deny that. You aid go
into a show. What of.it, Mr. Caudltit A
irond deal of it. sir. Nice crowding and
saueezing in those shows, I know. Pretty-
places! And you a mairied man and the
father of a fann v. No. I wont hold my
tongue. It's very well for you to threaten t.c
get up. You're to go to Greenwich Fair,
and race up and down the h'll, and play at
kiss in the ring. Bah! it's liisg isting, Mr.
Caudle. Oh, I daru siy you did play at it;
if you didn't, you'd have liked, and that'
just as bad; and you can go into the swings,
and shows, and round abouts. If I w is you,
I should hide try head under the clothes,
and bo ashamed of myself.
"And whr.t is most selfish mosf mean of
yon, Caudle, you can go nnd enjoy yourself,
and never so much ns br'ng home to the
children a gingerbreadnut. Don't tell ma
that your pocket was picked of a pound of
nuts! Nice company you have been in to
have your pocket picked.
" But I dare say I shall hear all about it to
morrow, I've no doubt, sir, you were dancing
at the Crowii-and-Anchor. I should like to
have seen you. No: I'm not making myself
ridiculous. Ii's you that's mnking yourself
ridiculous; and everybody that knows you
says so. Everybody knows what I have to
put up with from you.
" Going to a fair indeed t At your time
H
Here," says Caudle, " I dozed off, hear
ing confusedly tho words hill gypsies
roundabout swings pink . bonnet nuts."
Mrs.CaHdJc'sCnrlahi Lectures
Mr. Caudle has leen called from his bed td
bail Mr. Pr.Uy wan from the Watch
Hoiuc.
Fie, Mr. Caudle I knew it would come
ti tai?. 1 said it. would when you joined
iboso precious Skylarks. People being
called out of their bed at all hours of the
night to bail a sot of fellows who are never
so hfppy ns when they're leading sober men
to destirc ion. I si 0'ild like to know what
'he nehjibnis will think of you, with peoplo
fmrn the pol'ce knocking nt the doer at two
in tho morning. Don't tell me that tho man
Irs been ill-used lie's not Iho urn to bo
ill-used. And vou musl go and bail him. I
know the end of that he'll run away, and
you'll have lo pay the money. I should like
lo know what's the use of my working and
slaving to save a fa-thing, when you threw
awav pounds upon your prjeious Skylarks.
A pretty cold you'll have to-morrow morn
ing, being called out of your warm bed this
weather; but dont you think I'll nutse yoil
not I; not a drop of gruel do you get
from me.
I'atn sure you've plenty of ways of spend
ing your money not throwing it away upon
a set of dissolute peace breakers. It is very
well for you to say you havn'l thrown away
your money, but you will. He'll be certain
to run oil; it isn't likely he'il go upon his
trial, and you'll be fixed with the bail.
Dou't tell me there's no trial in the matter,
because I know there is; it's for something
more than quairXl ng w'th the pol'ceman
that he was locked up. People ain't locked
up for that. No it's robbery or something
worse, perhaps.
And as you've bailed him, people will
Ihiuk you arc as bad as ho is. Don't tell me
you couldn't help bailing him; you should
have shown yourself a respectable man, and
h-va let him been sent lo prison. .
Now people know you're the friend of
drunken and other d'sordorty persons; you 11
never have a night's sleep in your bed. Not
that it would mailer what fell upon you if it
wasn't ycur pcr w f who suffered. Of
couiso all the hus:ness will be in the news
nn tiers, and your name with it. I shouldn t
wonder, too, n iney give u" ...
they do the other folks of Ihe Old Bailey.-
( pretty thing that, to go down to your chit
lren. I'm sure it will be enough to make
them chanso their name. l snan noi
go lo sleep; it's all very well for you to say,
go to sleep, after such a disturbance. I
shall not go "
But here, says Mr. Uaunie s maiuiscripi,
happilv, she slnmleed; for Mrs. auuie
had, considering tho theme sho had to talk
upon, a remarkably short lecture.
Mfcfunn OP fumiNG OnSTINATfc HoESfiS.
A few days ago, as a carter was proceeding
in tho York road, near Doncaster, with a
load of stunes, his horse made a sudden .
stop, and refused, even after an unmerciful
whipping to proceed. A genneimiu iuiu
the infuriated carter he must not beat him
any more. " What shall I dot" said the
man, " my horse has stood here upwards an
hour; shall I stand here all day t" " Oh no,
ihe horse must go, but you must noi
him any more; get mo a tope twice as long
as the hors?." The rope was obtained, se
cured lo the horse's tail, and then passed
between tho legs forwards, alter wnicn
slight pull was given. Tho animal was
frightened, and showed strong hij.iuuw
kicking, but the pulling was conunueq.-
Suddenly he started forward and went off
wnnoui any iin'io uwu.i.ip. - e, . 7
said he had seen tho same method tried,
with similar efftct, 'on the most refractory
asses ever bred. If this fact is disputed by
those who have obstinate horses or asses, let
them try the experiment.
" Do yon think raw clams is healthy,' Bob t"
" Yes I do."
" Some folks say they isn't." '.
" I don't care what some folks say, but I
never knew a raw clam to complain of being
out of health.'"
A young widow who edils a paper in
a neighborhood says: "We doJioV appear
as interesting to-day as usual, on account of
the non-arrival of the males!" , ;
said I, after waiting half an hour for an an