mi!s f ebspper feiotti to politics, Jforttp - anb fmiKstic Jtos, jiltr&f, i$tv rls aiitr gaticts, $toeaiim, $jjriraltat, Pvkris, Mstrntnte A r
' ' " - . t ' 1 i t;' v - , I . . .
WOODSFIELD, MONROE COUNTY, OHIO, TUESDAY, NO VEMBElCl 6V-1S84.
:-';r- ' " 7
THE SPIRIT OF DEMOCRACY.
PUBLISHED EVERY TUESDAY.
IIETSTIY I. WEST,
EDITOR AND PROPRIETOR.
13T0FFICK Went Side of Main 8treet, two
' toon North of the Public Square.
. .- ; '
ne copy, one year, ': ' : $1 50
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TUUU OKIT...... .WILLIAM OK.IV
...if 1 HoUut Public
WTVr. OKEY & SON,
ATTORNEYS. AT LAW,
Will practice In Monroe and adjoining conn
lies, ffloe sonth 0 f Publio Square, formeily
' eensled by Bolllster & Ohey . . mch 1 4,'8'i .
a., jr. peaAsqn,;
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
(orricaoysM asTTsmss's stois.)
. ITIIjLI tn. II. CUflKK,
Attorney at Law & Notary Public,
' Nor. 11. 7-1t.
Attiraey at Law & Notary Public,
(Omoe ore? Pope & Castle's Drag Store.)
iW.9.d8f lold9 Ohio.
. Will prs'otloe ia Monros land other oeauties.
AjX'OlwN Et; AT.L A W,
, WOODSFIELD, OHIO.
"ATTORNEY AT LAW,
.REAL ESTATE AGENT,
v (Offloe up sulrs In the Court House.)
RLVr M ARTINif ILLE, WEST YA.
'j. r.'truei. dbioos
; ; rniGG9 & driogs,
"Attornty and OounttUort at Law
"And Claim Agents,
"tryioi Up itiiri In Court House.
, y - i ! ;
;HELBLp, & STOEHR'S,
Satra Indnoemants U onstomersT4n the way o
EMiUW OT PRICES
add air cheap as the chespsst, '
Wardrobes, Chairs, Tattles, Bo-
reans, Bedsteads, Looking
. Classes, Hat Racks, Picture
And everything else in the Furniture Lino
Pictures. Framed to Order
IN'BSST OP 8TYLK.
fyotip'ly and oarefally attended to, - All
kinds of Vodertaking Goods always on hand,
consisting of Coffins, Caskets,' Shrouds and
, Bnrixl Robes of all slses. dect7.'8: .
" Bend 8ix cents for
. .-j i
postage, uu receive
free.' a costly box of
.goods which will help
& i alL af either sea, to more money right away
, Aban anything else in this world. Fortunes
await the workers absolutely sure. At once
,!address Tan a Co., anguita, Mainodl-Sr.
II . B . II EN N I E,
.PHYSICIAN AND SURGEON,
Oraoe In the Armstrong property.
r . J WAT,
Physician and 1 Surgeon,
CLM COVE, Wathinato Tp, Monroe
All ealls promptly attended to, daring the
Uy or sight. feblS.'M.
Visits Woodsfleld Rcgnlarly. I guar-
snite oetter work and nse belter msterfals
thai any Dentitt in the psnnty aprlS84
Ohio Farmers Fire Insurance Com
1, e rot, on 10.
Insnres nothing bnt Farm nroperly. Sates
lower than those of any other Company doing
business in mis conotv.
Assets, : : $1,187,236 03
All Losses promptly paid.
norlJS. Agent for Monroe County.
(CHURCH COUMITTKB5. 8ohool Boards or
J prirate families desiring to pnrohsse an
OBQ AH ean procure first olass instrnments
at lowest cash prices by ealllng on or addres-
ing BfciV. W. T. OARROWAT,
Estey Organs a Specialty.,
-JLGt. W. POTTS,
General insurance" Agent,
Ag' lor the following Companies:
Also for Tornadoes, Cyclones, Hurricanes
and Wind 8torms.
AMAZON. - - rinclonatl.
ROY t. Of Liverpool, England,
LOKDON and LAWCASUIRE,
QUEEN of Liverpool, England.
OHIO, of payton. - Dayton.
Applications alio taken for radons other
Companies, all of which are the most relia.
ble Companies in the United States. All
Town and .Conntry ftullrtlnr.
Merchandise, Lnmbrr. .Stock,
Grain and Farm Implements.
Insured at low rates in good Companies. Ap
plications' 'either by mall or in person
promptly attended to." m27,'84T.
X"eT7v3vri nm ery
MBS. XT. J".
Keeps const nt!y on hand
MILLINERY GOODS & FANCY GOODS,
which are offered at prices to suit the times
All work entrusted to my care will be
promptly done. Please call and examine
Goods and learn prioes.
. MBS. N. J. CLARE,
septiiSO. ' Woodsfleld. Ohio.
Fine Art Marble Works,
JOHN M. EBERLE, Proprietor.
Of all kinds. Also manufacturer of Vonu
' ments. Tombstones, eto., of both
which he will sell at prices that
iikfy coinrjBTi now.
Belling Branlte is no experiment with me.
I hare been handling it so extensively this
season, and competition so severe, that tl
was necessary to make
for selling it. Parties .baying of me or of
m sgent, SIMON J. SORB. Woods-
field. Ohio, ean secure work 25 or 30 per
cent oheaper than elsewhere,
Designs and Estimates Famished
on application. Mr.- Bberle is the builder of
the Soldiers' and Sailors' Monument at Bell-
aire, Ohio. augl.8jT.
Groceries and Notions
FRITZ BUCKIO'H. ,
I hare just received a fall stock of Gro.
eenes, Notions, Tobacco, Cigars and Candles.
Can furnish you at low rates any artiole
kept In a grocery store. Giro me a call.
Nor. 30, 1883. FRITZ BDCKIO.
THE SPIRIT OF DEMOCRACY.
HEIVJRY IT. WEST,
EDITOR AND PROPRIETOR.
New fork Herald. 10th int
Blaine Attempting Revolution.
On Wednesday and Thursday last, the
two days following the election, the
Blaimb voters were cautiously told by
the Blaine manazera thatlbey 'believed'
they bad can led New York. They did
not "claim" the State, bat they "bad
That was not unnatural. The returns
came in "slowly, and the Blaink "estl
mates" based on the presumed effect-
iveneis of t vast corruption fund raised
at the Gould Blaise dinner and In the
Union League Club in the last week of
the canvass for immediate use were all,
of course, in their own favor. Dot the
actual returns as they came in proved
those "estimates" wrong. What hap
By Friday morning the returns were
in, and two men who more man au oin
ers in this country have the habit of get
ting the earliest correct news of all im
portant matters and the facilities for get
ting itthese two men, J at Gould and
William H. Vakderbilt, bad got the
correct news, and hastened to congratu
late President-elect Cleveland. Mr.
Gould was the earliest, for he telegraph'
ed President Cleveland tils i congratu
lations. Mr. Vanderbilt, more delibe
rate, wrote the President-elect, and wrote
him an admirable letter, too.
On the same day, Friday we wish our
readers to note the day tbe Republican
Committee telegraphed Mr. Blaikb that
Cleveland had carried 'New York.
At the same time Friday morning
the TrUune hauled down its flag and
ceased to put out bulletins.
That same Friday afternoon the Alba
ny Evening Journal, one of the strongest
Blaine journals outside of New York,
and placed at the point to" which official
returns are bxenght, said :
Indiana has undoubtedly gone Democratio,
and the reports of a Republican victory in
West Virginia and Florida are not substan
tiated. It seems elear that Govern r Clsvi.
lard Is elected, tor the Statea that have gone
Democratic have 219 electoral votes. Every
honest eltlsen and newspaper desires simply
that the vote shall be fairly counted and the
result declared as the vote was oast. The
Journal's claims ot Mr. Blainb's eleotlon were
based on the. best reports obtsinablo on
Wednesday and Thursday To-dav, Wh sa
in official xtnrsas bshovb all noosr, rr
.BASELY ACKBOWLSROSS SBPBAT.
But no sooner had Blaink received
the news that he was beaten, and that
his own supporters were actually ac
knowledging bis defeat, as good citizens
ought, than he telegraphed from Augusta
kit determination to try a bit of Mexican
tactics. Note the language of his p-o-nnncismento:
1 am advised there have been frauds in Hew
Tork State. I believe that the honest vote of
the State gives a Republican plurality, end 1
k the Committee to mo that we hve a fair
and honest ooant.
It is all I, I, I. Blaink bad been no
tified by tb Committee that the State
had gone .Democratic; he was not sure
that be could atir them up to support his
Mexicam'zins policy, and so, though Mr.
Gould and Mr. Vanderbilt, tbe two men
most sore to have correct news, were
convinced ; though the Albany Evening
Journal, hi, vigorous supporter, had
written ttat "to-day, when tbe official re
turns remove a' I donbt," the Jdurnal
"frankly acknowledges defeat;" though
bis own committee had telegraphed bim
that tbe State was for Cleveland, Blaine
refused to accept the (acts and impudent,
ly telegraphed. " believe there have
been frauds ; hlieve that the honest
vote gives New York to the B'publi
Everybody knows Blaine's boundless
audacity.' He care nothing for right,
nothing . for truth. O i tint very day
Friday he made at Augusta what is
perhaps the most shameless utterance of
which an American public man waa ever
I feel great pride that no imputation of frand
has ever been seriously uttered agintt the
merabtrs of the Republican party in any State
Blaine is tempting his followers to
revolution. d He has given notice that be
is ready lo M x'canize this country if he
can get anybody to stand by bim. He
helped to Bteal the Presidency in 1876;
be was part of the Dorsey "soap and
new .two dollar bill" campaign in 1830,
and took the State Department as bis re
ward. And be now appeals to his fol
lowers to help him in a etill more despe
We believe that this bold, bad man,
convicted lobbyist, convicted corruption
ist, convicted ally of star route and navv
thieves, convicted falsifier, convicted ig
noramus in all true statesmanship, con
victed trickster and political gambler,
will fail ia this last attempt at fraud and
revolution. He cannot graep the Presi
dency, because the people are looking at
hint, . ..i.
J3T Monuments, Headstones and Tab
lets of any design and of any materia
25 Per Cent. Cheaper than any other
etableiebment in Monroe or adjoining
counti3s, at the Miltonsburs Marble
Works, J. M. Ebeblx, Proprietor.
Hfew York World, 10th Inst.
The Rebels ot 1884.
Tbe two essentials of republican gov
ernment are honest elections and sub
mission to the will of the majority.
Mr. Blaine and bis mansgers did their
best to prevent an honest election by re
sorting to bribery, fraud and intimida
tion to control tbe result. Now that
they are defeated, they refuse to accept
the decision of the people.
Corruption having failed to accomp
plish its object, contention takes its
While confessing themselves beaten
on the face of their own returns, Mr,
Blaine and bis fiiends lack the decency
to submit gracefully to the will of tbe
They must submit at last, either vol
untarily or by the power of the law,
made inexorable by tbe fierce and con
suming lire of public wrath. But they
manifest a stubborn, revolutionary spirit
of resistance. '
They charge "frand" on the Democ
racy now that they are beaten on figures.
They want to introduce the Packard, Kel
logg and Wells Returning Board rascali
ties into our counties. They seek to get
obscure partisan Judges all over tbe
State to interfere with tbe count by man
damns. They call ioto service the men
who helped to manipulate th great fraud
of 1876. They pin their faith to Noah
Davis in this city, whose blind and bitter
partisanship s a disgrace and a scandal
to the Bench. They invoke the unscru
pulous assistance of George Bliss who,
with tbe cessation of Republican rule,
loses profitable Star Route fees and still
more' profitable "settlements" with pub
itc robbers. They stretch out their
bands to Evarts, whose conscience is
loaded with tbe crime and whose pock
ets are loaded with tbe profits of a for
mer theft of the Presidential office.
On wbatpretense do tbe B'aine brig
ands thus seek to fight the will of the
people? They allege that "changes"
have been made In some of the districts.
although their own returns give Cieve-
and a plurality.
Beaten on figures they fall hack on
frauds. They pretend that tbe Demo
crats contemplate cheating in tbe coun'.
Innocent victims! The Republicans
have possession of about four-fifths of
the counties of the State, yet they are to
be defrauded I Tbe County Clerks and
Supervisors are in their hands, but some
body is going to wrong their candidates
who are, by their own figures, shown to
be defeated already!
Where js the fraud to come from ?
The Republican coonties of the State, or
the grent Democratic city of New York,
hose election machinery is in the hands
of notorious Republican scoundrels
some of whom are already in Jiil on
charges of rascality at the ballot-box.
Whatever may be the object of Mr.
Blaine and his supporters, their course in
keeping np a baneful excitement and
arousing the worst passions of tbe com
munity is full of dsnger and is as un
wise as it is unpatriotic.
It is utterly impossible that an attempt
again to defraud the people should suc
ceed. Mr. Blaine' is defeated, and do
earthly power can reverse 'he result.
If Mr. Blaine bad been elected by a
ingle vote we should have assisted on
his peaceful assumption of-the office.
As be is beaten, he will find it far easier
to get into jail than into the White
We call upon all honest Republicans
who supported Mr. Blaine to let their
protest be beard against tbe base attempt
to disturb the peace and tarnish tbe
honor of tbe country.
A large number of such citizens have
privately denounced Mr. Blsine's course
since election. ' A number of tbe most
reputable journals on Mr. Blaine's aide
already give up tbe fight and deplore tbe
unnecessary agitation. Bubees is un
settled. People's minds are dlstnrbed,
and for what? .
Because a thoroughly bad set of polit
ical adventurers are mad with rage at tbe
prospect of having to give up tbe spoils
of office and the chance of plunder.
The course of the Blaine brigands is
an offense against the peace and honor
of the nation. It should be severely re
buked and summarily disposed of.
How He Lost Uis Wealth.
Pittsburgh Chroniole-Telait raph.
"What are you crying tor, little boy ?
asked a kind-hearted gentleman from tbe
country who read the newspapers.
"I ve loat my money, sir, sobbed tbe
Where did you lose it my little
"I dropped it in Wall street, sir."
"Great heavens! Are even children
drawn into that great gambling mssl
strom? What stock did vou drop it
in?" - '
"I dropped it down a cellar grating,
sir. It was a' nickel."
He Didn't Forget.
"In reviling and abusing your mother-
in-law," put in the preacher, as Pitzoo
ber wound up his tirade on those defense
less creatures, "you should not lose
sight of the fact that to them you owe
the existence of your affectionate wife."
"I didn't lose sight or it," snapped
Fi'z; then in an undertone he added "if
I bad, maybe I wouldn't have "been so
b".rd on the old lady."
' He that bsth experience needs no
explanation of the above.
Sick Headacue cured with one tea
spoonful Cheney's Stomach and Liver
Regulator. Price 91. Sold by R. W
k Sew York Herald, loth Inst.
. The. Vergje ot Revolution.
, Mr. William M. Evarts (who Was
Hayes lawyer before tbe Electoral dotn
nissiun and was also the presiding of
fleer at the recent money raising dinner
given by Jay Gould and Cyrus Field to
Blaine) and Mr. George BlUs (who was
the, government's lawyer in tbe star
route trials, in which be secured the sc
quitfal of Dorsey, and has since been a
defender of Blaine's . Mulligan transac
tions) were in secret conference , last
night at the bouse of tbe latter concern
ing ways and means to dispute the hon
est election of Governor Cleveland to
ftbe Et esidency, f . . f. "
" The p'an relates to more than one
State. Dudley and New are relied on to
engineer U in Indiana. As to Niw York,
it is exposed and denounced it the stir
iog address issued by the Democratic
State Committee at a later hour, which
we publish at the head of our political
news columns. It is farther explained
in an important interview with Mr. Wil
lim C Whitney, which is printed in the
Blaine's expectation, w'fi Evarts and
Bliss for his chief engineers, is to deal
with boards of supervisors in a sufficient
number of the counties of New York
jast as the returning hoards of Florida,
Louisiana and Sonth Carolina were dealt
with in 1876. With the assurance of
findiog onscrnpuliut republican poli
ticians in command of some of them.
and with the hope of finding facile re
publican judges in some of tbe rural
courts, Messrs. Evart and B!is, with a
gang of subordinate lawyers from this
city and its neighborhood, proposes to
invade selected counties and bulldoze or
juggle tbe canvassing of their returns so
as to cheat Governor Cleeland out of
bis majority of the people's ballots.
They do not propose t go into all the
sixty counties. By no means. Tbat
would upset the plot, for technical ir
regularities in a general investigation
would be pretty sure to balance one an
other. What the propose is only a
one-sided inquisition, as partial as it is
perfidious. And it is au inqilsition for
which there is no demand from the se
lected counties. It is planned ' in the
metropolis and is to be conducted insult
ingly to tbe people of those counties oo
directions drawn op in the central nest
of Blaine conspirators here. We have
selected the apt word when we term it
an invasion. ' .
We have plain and very sernus words
to say to Messrs. Evarls and B us about
this plot :
"Gentlemen, you will push tbii coun
try perilously near to tbe verge of a revo-
utiqn if you persist in your chicanery
and fiod unscrupulous suprviiors and
facile judges to do your bidding Your
party was fairly beaten in the election.
Tbe majority did not submit to be howl
ed out of i's victory last week and will
not submit to be juggled out of it this
week. It has no more respect for your
lawyers' tricks than It has for a mob's
bludgeons. - The Presidential cheat of
1876 shall not be repeated with success,
nor attempted with impunity. You may
flitter, yourselves that your lawyers'
gowns are strong enough armor to pro
tect you. But beware, for your own
sake, lest yon be mistaken. If yon are
as wise as your recent associate, Jay
Gould, you will follow bis example of
"Look here," said a judge to a jury
man, ' I do not desire to wound your
feelings, but why don't yon put on a
clean shirt ?"
"Because my wife bas been very busy
for several days and I bave bad no one
to sew on buttons "
"Hasn't your wife had tiie to sew on
No, sir." ' -
"Wnat's the matter, children sick?"
'No, sir: children sqmewhat dirty,
but in good health."
"What is your wife doing that keeps
ber so constantly employed ?"
"Well, you see, several days ago, onr
minister came around and said that by
such a time he had to have 200 pairs of
breeches to send to tbe heathens, and
my wife good sonl that she is bas been
busy ever since. Just wait, judge, till
she gets through, and then I'll come
around and dazzle this court with the
whitest shirt you ever seed." .
An Inside View.
Mrs. Winks Oh, dear,h'w glad I
am that the campaign is over! You
know my husband i running for office.
Well, he has not been at home nntil af
ter midnight for three months. You
see, he bas to be out with the boys everv
niiht gaining friends by maaioj promi
ses and pledges and things.
Mrs. Fink O', yes, I underetsnd;
promising appointments and contracts
and 'divvies" and so oo.
"But do yea think he will change bis
habits a'l of a sudden 7
"Yes, if he is successful."
"You think so ?"
"Ob, no doubt of It. He never wsnts
to see anybody after he gets elected."
Don't Give Up Tot.
It doesn't follow that a patient will die
because tbe doctors have "given bin up"
or that be will recover because they
promise to null bim tnrougn." it is
never to late to try the great virtues of
Parker's Tonij. Mr. Michael Guilloyle.
of Binghamton, N. Y.. was cured of
Rheumatism by it at ter ten years of un
speakable suffering.' Mr. R. W. Misher,
druggist,' of same city, certifies that be
bas sold over a thousand bottles of Par
ker's Tonic through its reputation for
this and other cures.
Fascination of the Arctic Regions
' - "" . . - ,
Interview in the Benton Commonwealth.
"Had you any un ipeoied experiences
when vou got in-the blgber latitudes
aside from the general one pertaining to
the expedition ?"
Oh,- yes.' " One morning, for instance,
when the atmesphere was hazy from a
light tall of snow, in going a stiff nine
knot gait,' we ran plump into an iceberg
that was in our way, and for which no
one could see. For a moment I thought
every mast would go by tbe board, and
that my hair and teeth bad preceded
tuem. I never got quite such a shock.
I was nea.ly thrown out of the crow's
nest. I expected soj&tyjiear the Alert
was leaking. But, strange as it may
seem, with a rebound of at least thirty
feet, there was not a seam started. It
was almoat miraculous that we had no
catastrophe,, and shows bow thoroughly
. t i t . m .
toai snip was oun. ior just sncu encoun
ters in those seas. On a other occasion.
wheo over against tbe Greenland coast,
I counted not less than J 500 iceberg
that bad been pushed from tbe glacial
formation oo tbe sloping headlands of
the coast into the s a. We could oc
casionally bear the crackling that indi
cated tbe fissure; but the sight of tnese
majestic monarchs of the sea sailing oil
in the morning sunlight, with all the
colors of tbe prism, was something that
cannot be described Fascinating re
gion i no you ask. JNsver a one more
so. I wanted to stay there awhile Evpq
the men I took at New Bedford and Niw
London j imped at tbe chance to go,
through some of tbem said tbev did not
expect to cme back again. Why, af
ter we got Greely, and our mission was
accomplished, I never felt such a pang
of disappointment that, with seventy
two days of summer weather before me,
and an open sea, I was obliged to turn
my prow homeward and ahsndoo the
chance to get a higher lail.nde than any
other explorer " . "
. "Do you think you wonld have had a
success had yon been at liberty to have
entered on such a trip?"
"It seemed-so; at least, just then.
And this leads me to say .that tbe re
mark I have quoted from Weyprecht
was vindicated ii my' experience. Tbe
theory of winter sojourning in tbe high
latitudes, in order to be oo the ground
fgr another season's continuance, is, in
mv judgment, all a mi-take. The men
might as well come home and have the
advantages of civilizuion. Nothing is
gained -by remaining within tbe Arctic
circle that cannot be realized tbe next
season by starting early if the' condi
tions are favorable. And these oondi
ttons rest upon an oc-en sea. Now, some
seasons all the waters are tilled with ice
that it is impossible to penetrate. The
very next aea-ori every strait, bay and
channel is likely to be open water. .The
winds, currents and many unknown or
undemouslrated influences affect tbe ice.
What should be.done is to get everything
in readiness early in tbe year, and by
May or earlv June be at the upper set
tlements. Tnen follow promptly tbe
open water, and tbe occa-i n will come,
sooner or later, when the pole will be
reached. In my case I c mid have got
far to the northward, and, if caught in
the upper seas, I bad provisions that
would have lasted possibly two years,
before which time I should havo worked
out of the trap. In this connection, l t
me tell an anecdote. We were batting
firetty effectually one dav some ice that
mpeded our progress, wheo one of the
Dundee whaling captains said in admi
ration of our prowess : 'Ye i I that but
ting in fpine style, and it is a tough ship
that you have; but if you keep it op.
you will ruin your ship for a second sea
son. Second season !' exclaimed I
'none tor us, if yon please! We shall
find Greely and be back again long be
fore we begin to divide the seasons I'
And so It turned out."
lie Was Indcntifled.
Bank cashier You will .have to get
aome one to identify you, sir.
Rural stranger Wall, now, don't yon
know me? I came-from the same town
wharyou was brought up.
"Yry sorry, but I don't remember
you. It will be necessary to find some
one In the city who knows you and is
known to us."
"Wall, let's see, there's old Perkyns ;
he lives in the city. He Is the man you
used to steal apples from. You remem
ber one day he got his gun and loaded
it with salt, and"
"Pardon me, I do not know Mr. Per
kyins." Forgotten him, too, eh? Well, old
Mrs. McGrady, that gev you such a
tronchin' fur s'eal "
"Never mind. I recall your face now.
Here ia the roonev."
One of tbe last criminals sent for life
from this city, savs the Datroiv Free
Press, received a call from two or three
Mends toe day before he was taken o
Jackson. Being asked if he was in wsnt
of anything be replied that he'd-like lo
borrow $2 One of the visitors said he
could spare that sum and passed it over,
"but as he left the jail one of his compan
ions said r- ' .
"How do yon expect to get yonr mon
Why, Bill'a honet.t.w
Yes, but he's sentenced for life."
"Yes, bnt don't yon see, I'll garnishee
the State Prison if he doesn't pay like a
Genealogy and Grief. -Paris
Yes, brethren," says the clergyman
who . ia preaching the funeral sermon,
"our deceased brother was cut down in
a single night torn from the arms of
bis loving wife, who is thus left a dicon
solaie widow at -the early age of 24
"Twenty-two, if you please," sobs the
widow, in tbe front pew, emerging from
her handkerchief for an instant.
.ear John M. Ebbslk. Proprietor of
tbe Miltonsburg Marble Works, Is pre
pared to furnish Monuments, .Tablets
and Tombstones per Cent. lOWei
than any other establishment in Monroe
county. Work from his shops can be
aeen all over the county. ' -
.LIVING LIKE A PRINCE.
Bat Without So Much As a Dollar
to JJlesa Uimselt With.
: ' ' Brooklyn 'Eagle : . ' ,
Curious etories are often told about
men of no fortune who live like million
aires. Occasionally instances like that
of "Lord Abererombie," who lived like
a Vanderbilt for a few months, croo no.
But it is seldom that a man turns up
who can live like a Russian prince, drive
blooded horses,' give elaborate dinners
and move among a fast set of men
without having any money of his own.
There ii such a man, of rather boy, in
X jw York at tbe present time. . He bas
been going at a terriuo rate for 2 years
I shall call bim Smith, because it is not
his name. .. He is -an ideal dude. - His
flgurefcai3t to emaciation, his
chest narrow,-bis arms and legs long
and bis face absolutely colorless.- More
than this, it is an effeminate face, with
email features, weak eyes and an irreso
lute month. It is familiar to half the
people in New York. At every event of
importance this pale and languid dude
is on hand. He has an extraordinary
assortment of clothes, were numberless
rings, and is usually acoompanied by a
valet. He comes' of Very respectable
people. I know bis mother and several
of his relatives. .They will bave nothing
to do with bim, and his name is never
mentioned, at home. About two years
ago be got In a. scrape up-towu, for
which he need ready money at onoe.
He begged bis people to give bim 91000,
and tney refused point blank. Then be
gathered all of bis mother's .diamonds,
pledged them for about 93000, and took
a steamer for raris When be arrived
there be walked into a commission house,
asked the head ot the firm for a pointer
and languidly tossed bim a check for
97000 for investment. One turn on the
bourse landed bim nearly 920,000 ahead
He made a few more successful specula.
tions, drew the whole amount of bit
gain, which bad then reached about 930
000, and prepared to "aee" Paris. He
was then twenty years old. Of course
no one knew that when be speculated in
91000 lots be was risking his whole for
tune at everv turn of the market. He
was so placid and serene during his
operations that they gave bim credit for
having a big fortune in reserve. Mr
Smith made things howl in Paris. He
lived there four months, spent every
penny he had, and returned to America
with half a dozen trunks filled with
clothes, no end to jewelry, leaving tbe
tradesmen of Paris doleful" and forlorn.
He owed money right and left in tbe
French capital, but be never allowed it
to worry him. When be arrived in New
York he bad another interview with his
family, but be was so thoroughly unman
ageable tbat be waa again tossed out of
the house, which he has never since en
tered. A little crowd of eycopbanta
hong around him for. a time, but they
bave nearly all. deserted bim now and
he bas but one companion a man who
is said to be an adventurer and who no
body knows. The little dude goes ev
erywhere, as I said before. He may be
seen driving on the avenue In the after
noon in a trap that is strictly correct in
every detail, and he attends the theater
and the opera steadily. He is cut right
and left, owes every man money, and is
frequently abused in publio life by his
dupes B it the expression of hi face
never changes and he is apparently as
happy as he was in Paris, when at the
height' of his fortune.- He is known
about town bv the name of "Jiblitts."
I don't know where the nickname came
Training ot Children.
"Aunt Pattie" in London Letter.
As soon as your little lass can prat'le
and run about teach ber order,-cleanliness,
ne a'ness and economy, -Tbe sec
ond you can commence almost at birth
Bay her some toys dolls, a bouse and
a cradle if possible oopply ber with a
place to put. them ii, nor suffer any
member of tbe family to disturb or ap
propriate that place. As soon ss she i
tired of her playthings maks her care-
fully dust and stow them neatly away io
their proper places. This will teach ber
order and punctuality. As she advances
give ber lessoos In sewing and making
garments for her dolls; also to mske the
curtains, carpets and upholstery for tbe
chairs aofas and ottomans, and arrange
them properly, to keep the house clean
and the doll's clothes also. By this you
will lay tbe foundation of a good, sound,
practical domestic bducalion, and will
soon discover all tbe elements of a well
ordered and regulated system prevading
everv acion and movement of yout lit
Rewarding the Old Man.
A faithful employe had grown old in
tbe service of a railroad and at last be
came too feeble to work.
The president was ssked if tbe com
pany would not do something for him as
be was very poor.
'How long baa be been with us r . the
official inquired. ; .
"Over forty years.
"Alwsys did his duty?"
"Never missed a day V
"ton say be is very old and feeble?"
"Yes; the chsnces are that be will
never leave his bed again."
"H-m, poor fellow! Of course we
must do. sotnethtng for him. I'll give
him a lite pass." . .
Work for the President Only.
. Rochester Post-Gazette.
Bank President Well you may con
aider yourself engaged as janitor. Tbe
position, as you will see from the In
atructions I have given you, is sot a dif
ficult one to fill, yet it carries with it a
good deal of responsibility .
Hew Janitor I am much obliged, sir,
for the place. There s one thiog. how
ever you've not told me about- Shall I
clean out the bank every night?
Bank President Oh, no, I'll attend to
3TJ M. Ederli, Proprietor of the
Miltonsburg Marble Works, and build
er of tbe Soldiers' and Sailors' Monu
ment, at Bell aire. Is closing out bit im
mense stock of Headstones, Tablets and
Granite and Marble Monuments 25 PCr
CCnt. CHEAPER than any other estab
Uihmenl can do it. '
JJELVA IN THE WHITE IIOUSR. ;
A CaYlinet Meetlrj of the Period
: When Women Shall Steer -the
Ship ot State.
' Washington Repubiioait
A servant said tbe Presided would be?
down as sooo as she finished trying on
ber dress. The Attorney General took
out her knitting and said : "Wall, I might
as well be working No telling bow long
.we'll have to wait ' Eager attention on -tbe
part of tbe . Cabinet interrupted by
the servant's announcement: ,
"Her Exoellency, the President of the
Good morning, ladies." :
"Good morning, Mrs. President."
All In chorus ,"Oh! what a lovely ,
uTeas." . , .
' "Yes," said iW President; "1 tTiongbrt '
I would Just wear it down and let you all
see it. It is pretty, isn't it? Just look
at the hang of the train."
"It'e perfectly magnificent," said thef
Secretary of War. "Those fine pleating
of crepe de chine give it such a lovely
finish. Bnt isn't it just a little short In
"Why, of course," said the President
with some asperity. "I bave tbem all
made tbat way so as not to bave tor
change when I ride the tricycle." .
"I hope It's sll silk," said tbe Attorney
General slicking ber knitting needle
through ber back hair while she robbed
a piece of the dress between her tbomb
and finger. "Did you eave me a piece
for my crszvuilt?"
"Oh, yes," aaswered the President af
fably. "And now let's get to hosineas,!
ladlea. I haven't much time this morn
ing. I hare lo ait for my pio'ure at one
The most Important business I know
of," siid tbe Secretary of State, "ia to
decide on a Minister to the Court of St:
James. You know Lowell has asked to
be recalled." -
"Ob, yes ; I forgot all abont that," isid;
the. President. "Whom shall we send ?"
"If it only bad been earlier," ssid the
Assistant Secretary of tbe Navy reflect'
ively, "I wonld bave gone myself; but.
the season Is over by this time, and then
I get so horribly seasick."
. "It will be had to get any one to go,"
observed the Secretary of War,. ! am
told tbe climate is so damp tbat your '
hair never stavs in curls at all."
"Is tbat so V aked tbe President ap
prehensiviily. Well, we must send some
one. Ani then, the President went on, .
"there's Girmany to provide for."
"Ob, what a tbe use of sending any
one to Germany, Mrs President T' asked'
tbe Secretary of War.
Ob, don't you know," said tbe Sec
retary of State," there's Herr Most and
pork and Lasker and Bismarck and all -
those things to talk about ?"
"I know there was a color called Bis
marck some years ago," said the Secre
tary of the Treasnry meditative! aa ahe
aorted ber ctewels, "but It was hideously
unoecomlng. . -
"But there's a new red brown thla fall
said the Postmaster General escerlv.
that's jurt perfectly lovely for a dark
cosplexion.'tbough I think mvsetf noth
ing wears as well as the old seal brown
Spesking of seal brown," said the
Assistant Secretary of the Navy, "how
about the CotcmUsioner who was to be
sent to Alaska to provide ns all with
sealskin dolmans? It's getting pretty
coot ; the frot touched my tuberoses last
Ills First Elephant.
A correspondent lately returned from,
Ceylon, writing to the Psll Mall Gazette
about tbe Prince of Wales' elephant,
draws by Mr. Steward Cumberland,
which Is minus a tail, says : "It la not -improbable
tbat the mind of the Prince
of Wales frequently reverts to tbe ele
phant he first shot in tbe jangles of Cey,
Ion, ar.11 few who , accompanied bim are
ever apt to forget tbe about of deligLt
itn wDicn be beheld the huge animal
begin lo stagger, to sly nothing of the
alacrity displayed in docking the poor
brute of bis tail X bov ever carried
borne bis first bee with greater glee than
the Prince carried this tail In vain Lord
Charles Biresford offered to relieve his
royal bands; the Prince Dositivelv
refused to part with it untii he reached
ttie carriage roat where tbe conveyance '
waited bim. Carefully placing the-
trophy in the bottom cf the carriage.
his royal highness assumed the reins ; but
the horses, fidgety by long wailing,
disloyally declined to answer the whip,
and, as a matter of fact, iibbed our fu
ture king and all his paraphernalia into
the ditcn, from the depths of which a
voice was soon beard to exclaim
"Charlie. Charlie! not 'wha wadna fol
low ib.ee!' but for God's ttke care of
my tail!" .
Ethan Allen, 1739-1789.
Ethan Allen, the "Green Mountain
Lion," was one of the early Revolution
arv beroet. Born In Connecticut In
1739, and removing to Yermoflfat twen
tv-four years of age,be soon became Col
onel of the "Green Mountain Boya." aa
organization formed to resist settlira
from New York who disputed with New
Hampshire a right to tne land. Hav
ing succeeded in driving out the Nw
Yorkers, a reward of 150 waa offer
ed by the New York Governor lor his
arrest. His next exDlolt was the eaotnra
of Ticonderoga from tbe British in the
nrst year or tin revolution. With Soth
Warner and bis "Green Mountain boys"
tie. surprised tbe captain or the fortress,
and "in the name of the Great Jehovah
and tbe Continental Congress." deman -
ded ita surrender. Shortlv after this
gallant deed, which wrested all the
northern region from England, Allen
was captured In an unsuccessful attack
on Montreal on Seitember 25, 1875.
He was sent to Eiglsnd and kept a
prisoner till 1778 Till bis death la
1789 he was actively engaged in border
struggles with Canada, and also wrote
several books of an . atheistical charac
Is Very Prevalent and errieedlnirl
disagreeable disease, liable, if neglected.
to aeveiop into eerions consumption.
Being a constitutional disease, it require
a constitutional remedy like Hood'a Sa'r
sspsrilla, which, acting through the
blood, reaches every part of the system,
effecting a radical and permanent curt
f eatarrh in even Its most severe forms.
Made only by C. I. Hood Co., Lowell,
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