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THE AGE - HERALD
W. RARRKTT. Kdltor Entered at the Birmingham. Ala., post office ds second-class matter under act of Congress March 3, 1873. Dally and Sunday Age-Herald.$8.00 Daily and Sunday, per month. Sunday Age-Herald, per annum.2.00 Weekly Age-Herald, per annum.1 00 Subscription payable In advance. L. H. Russ and George D. Brittain are the only authorized traveling representa tives of The Age-Herald in its circulation department. No communication will be published without Its author's name. Rejected man uscripts will not be returned unless stamps are enclosed for that purpose. Remittances ran he made at current rate of exchange. The Age-Herald will not be responsible for money sent through the mails. Address TIIE AGE-HERALD. Birmingham. Ala. Eastern business office, rooms 48 to 50. Inclusive, Tribune building. New York City; western business office, Tribune building. Chicago. The S. C. Beckwith Special Agency, agents foreign advertis ing. Washington Bureau Age-IIerald d street, N. W. Look where he comes! Not poppy, nor mandragora, Nor all the drowsy syrups of the world, Shall ever med'eine thee to that sweet sleep Which thou ow'dst yesterday. —Othello. Alabama’s Railroad Mileage. On New Year's day Alabama had 4t;72 miles of railroad in operation, standing in that respect seventeenth in the list of states. The only souths crn states that outrank Alabama are Georgia, which has 6541 miles of rail road. and Texas, which has 11,931 miles. Texas is alone outranked by Illinois. The two states are neck-and-neck, Il linois having ten miles more. The area of Illinois is 56,650 square miles; Ala bama has 52,250 square miles. The size of the two states is nearly alike, and yet Illinois’ railroad mileage Is 11,94-1. while A.abama's is but 4672. in order to bring our mileage up to that of Illinois, our railroads would have to be nearly trebled in length. Railroad mileage cannot, of course, be based on square miles of suiface. It is necessarily based on population and industrial activity. These create traffic, and traffic, present or pros pective, is what builds railroads. If we can fill Alabama full of peo ple—if we can cultivate all the state instead of one-third of it—if we can attract hither Industries of all sorts, Alabama will yet need as many rail roads as Illinois has today. No one believes the limit of lailway construction lias been reached in this country. We have all told 217,250 miles. If the country were equipped with railrodds up to the New Jersey standard it would have 889,705 miles. The Illinois basis calls for 672,000 miles; the Pennsylvania basis for 750, 250 miles, and the Massachusetts basis for 770,705 miles. There arc some w.,o think there may yet be a million miles of railroad in the country, and in that ease Alabama's quota would be fully 20.000 miles. Tarfl Rpvsinn East and West. In Iowa Governor Cummins has long favored tariff revision, and the republicans of bis slate stand behind him. The new governor of Massa chusetts. Curtis Guild. Jr., was in augurated last week, ana in his In augural he said: "Through the conventions of her two groat parties, through her general court and governor, members have already de manded from the national government the construction of a tariff framed to meet the lines of the modern completion. Members ask the removal of such duties as are now needless, the reduction of iuoh duties as were once Just, but now are excessive of the United States by • more friendly trade treaties with other nations. Massachusetts asks no exclu sive favors. Massachusetts stands at the council board of the nation, not as a broken beggar, whimpering for alms, but as a strong man demanding action from his peers.” When Iowa in the west and Massa chusetts in the east demand tariff re vision, it is plain the careers of the beneficiaries of the Dingley tariff have nearly run their robber course. Re vision cannot safely be delayed be yond the present Congress, aud tf !t be postponed beyond the first session of the next Congress It will become the chief issue of 1908, and the elec tion of that year both for a president and for members of Congress will turn upon it. Three Hundred Milliens. A recent report of the department of commerce and labor shows that our trade with Germany in the last fiscal year aggregated over three hundred million dollars. We bought from Germany goods to the vulue of $18, 000,000, and we sold to the Germans goods worth $194,000,000. It Is this great trade that will b9 cut"down, if not cut off, early in March, unless the administration and Congress^ modify In a reciprocity treaty Dingley rales. If we continue I to stand pat on Dingley rates, Ger many's new retaliatory tariff will 50 into effect in March, and our second best customer will be to some extent lost. Great Britain is our best cus tomer, and Germany has stood next. Germany now proposes to do busi ness on a reciprocity basis, and If the standpatters in Congress throw away her great trade they should In all fairness make up the sum to this country. The loss thus inflicted by them will be over three hundred mil lion dollars, and we will sensibly feel the loss of that amount of business. We may sell them cotton as hereto fore, but we will not be able to sell them provisions, breadstuffs, oils and the like to the extent of last year. The blow will fall heavily on the farmers of the northwest. The standpatters are selfish and grasping to the limit, and when our great trade with Germany is cut down the country will at. any rate have an object lesson in Dlngleyism. Out of fear that they will lose some of the privileges the standpatters propose to defeat any attempt to make a reci procity treaty with Germany. The Policy of Suppression. Attention is directed to an article printed elsewhere on this page, in which specific charges made by the Montgomery Advertiser regarding the accuracy of a report written by a rep resentative of this newspaper and printed in The Age-Herald of Wednes day last are answered. It is impossible to read the state ments made by Mr. Jones G. Moore and Capt.. Benj. F. Roden and not to wonder by what process of reason ing the Advertiser could have obtained the consent of its mind to print on its editorial pages charges so frivolous. The Age-Heralrtuvill not permit Itself to bandy words with its Montgom ery contemporary. The Advertiser charges The Age-Herald also with in consistency and parly disloyalty be cause The Age-Herald had the temer ity tt> print in its news columns a dis patch from its Washington corre spondent that did not exactly coincide with its editorially expressed opin ions on a certain feature of the pri mary plan. The editorial page of a newspaper has its functions—and they are ex ceedingly important functions. The news columns of a modern newspaper have other and different functions, and the importance of those functions can not. easily be magnified. 'ihe late Charles A. Danna, in an address at Cornell university a few years before his death, said that “the newspaper that doesn’t print the news isn’t a newspaper.” We agree with that opinion. No matter what may he its editorial views on public questions, The Age-Herald is resolved to present to its readers the news—no matter whether the presentation of that news helps or hurts the cause advocated by The Age-Herald. % Other newspapers in the state, tu their effort to be “consistent,” may suppress the news—may minimize the importance of what their opponents think and say and do, and magnify the importance of what they and their supporters do, say and think. That Is merely a matter of individual policy and individual taste. So far as The Age-Herald is concerned it will con tinue to print the news without fear and without favor. An Acceptable Plan. 'i'he action of the state committee is approved alike by ihe Selma Times, a Comer paper, and by the Montgom ery Advertiser, an anti-Comer paper. Both sides in the gubernatorial con test thus find good features in the committee’s plan. Approval of the plan, too, comes from all parts of the state. The Mo bile Item at one end of the state com mends it as warmly as does the Hunts ville Mercury at the other end. The county press have not had, as yet, occasion to discuss it freely. Not a few of them present, however, the leading points of the plan, and not a word of opposition or dissent appears In one of them, not even in the Opelika News. The last named paper does, however, say that "the state commit tee did what It could to take care of Senators Morgan and Pettus." This will perhaps be regarded as more commendatory than critical. The Brewton Standard does discuss the committee’s plan at length, say ing In conclusion that the committee tilled four columns when they could have said in a dozen words that Mr. Comer Rhall have no chance to go to the Senate. This is an eccentric view of the party programme, for It would not be easy to find in that programme evidence of any such design on the committee’s part. But aside from the Standard’s novel position no criticism of the pro gramme has appeared In the county press, and the impression grows stronger each day that the committee's action will be cordially supported In all parts of the state. Santa Domingo Affairs. Under the treaty made with the mulatto republic—but not ratified— over a million dollars has been col lected by the United States and im pounded in a New York bank. Only a small part of the moneys collected by this country in Dominican custom houses is held back for the payment of debts, the rest going to the Domin ican government to meet running ex penses. President Morales, who signed the treaty for Santo Domingo, has run away, and the name of the new pres i irlr-nt 1« scarcely known. The valid ity of the present government Is as uncertain as Its maintenance. Vo say nothing about our right to collect revenues in Santo Domingo, Itoi.tQ OUl' &U4toJ UL ti Ul Ji. iiUc.14 uk vCJ ward off revolutions, there is the still more vexatious problem as to the dis position of the money collected. To whom shall we pay the money? The treaty with Santo Domingo is not a treaty because it has not been ratified by the Senate, and Congress has in no way authorized the work assumed by the administration in Santo Do- j mingo. The entire business constitutes as it stands a very considerable goveru vk nial muddle, and unless the Senate luiifies or rejects the pending treaty it is difficult to see any way out of it. The tangle is wholly due to the precipitancy of the administration, and it is safe to say that it is embar assed no little by the strange and un precedented features of the situation. That situation will become all the more embarasslng when the creditors of Santo Domingo begin to demand money payments on their claims, the most of which have been well watered. Congressman Underwood sends as surances that the building of a me teoroligleal station In Fountain Hoights park will be begun on July 7. This will be a big gain to this city and district. The Sultan of Ttirkey has been asked to grant a constitution also, it is in the air, and the business was be gun in the tail end of the eighteenth century by France and the United States. The delegates to Algeetras are get ting Anal instructions, and they read in favor of peace, and yet battleships are being concentrated there. Iz Durham has resigned in a public manner his bosship by asking his fol lowers to make the best terms they can with the other fellows. Russia’s raid in the Far East cost her a trifle over a billion dollars, not to mention her losses in territory, prestige trade and ships. The chances are that Miss Alice Roosevelt is thinking more about get ting married than the President is about the Senate. Rogers is up against the New York supreme court, and it will be strange indeed If he can trifle with it, or baffle it in any way. A musical comedy may yet be writ ten about II. H. Rogers an.l E. H. Har riman, the leading comedians of high finance. Speaker Joe Cannon is the Ameri can Doubassoff, and he has a good sized beet-sugar insurrection on his hands. The White House cook quit in a huff during the holidays. This coun try is still a democracy. The Krupp works are going along quietly, and this signifies a peaceful conclusion at Algeciras. Mrs. Minor Morris seems destined to become almost as prominent as Mi i. Chadwick was. Tho winter still hesitates to become severe and trying, and its opportunity is slipping away. - . -■>- 1 It has been suggested that the Osier plan be applied to trust magnates who do not answer. Rogers defies all supreme courts, state or national. He seems to think he owns them. Secretary Wilson needs $35,000 to buy microscopes. Santa Cl^us over looked him. Mr. Bryan will come home a datto. So long as he does not become a duke all is well. Premier C-B will soon know if ho has a job good for seven years, or a few days. The standpat party is now led by Uncle Joe Cannon, and he carries a club. It is said wine will prevent appen dicitis, bo will cold pison. We don't hear ao much these days about the missing link. Birmingham is proud of her home made trolley car. Russia needs money as badly as she needs reform. Exposure has become almost a fad. REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR. From the New York Press. When a woman trusts Iter husband It Is a sign she doesn't let him know it. People can be friends as long as they dbn’t try to prove anything to each other. Generally a girl picks out the wrong man to fall In love with once; but the man does It a hundred times. Is>ts more bachelors would become hus bands If tbclr married friends weren't always trying to convince them that It Isn't all misery. The difference between a man and a woman with money is that she can have just as much fun spending ton dollars as a hundred If she can spend every cent of 1L i IN HOTEL LOBBIES Joel Chandler Harris. Evelyn Harris, formerly city editor of the Atlanta Constitution, is now special agent of the Southern Bell Telephone company, and his duties lie in seven states. He spent yesterday in Birming ham. “My father," he said yesterday. j “refuses to consider himself an old man j even if the'school children do insist upon j celebrating his birthday anniversary. He is but 57 years old, and, his health and strength are as good as they ever have been. “He does no newspaper wrork nowadays, and he finds all the work he cares to do in the magazine and book field. All of his books sell steadily, even the first volume of Uncle Remus stories being in good demand.” Mr. Harris lias three brothers, two of whom are doing newspaper work, while one is in politics. The last named holds a position in the court house. He also has two sisters just grown to woman hood, both being under twenty years of age. Mr. Harris is a son of Joel Chandler Harris who is beloved in all parts of the south, and who was recently honored in so signal a manner by the President of the United States. Neglected Novel. "Have you ever read 'Pemberton; or One Hundred Years Ago?’ " "Well, ‘Pemberton’ isn't much, as a work of historical iiction, but it bears the unique distinction of never having been called for in the Birmingham public libra ry. The number of patrons of the insti tution it well up in the thousands; yet not one has ever been attracted by the title. “ ‘Pemberton’ Is No. 7682, and has re posed on shelf No. 7 for fourteen or more years. Not only has no one ever called for it, but there is no record of the donor of tho book. It was written by Henry Peterson and published In Philadelphia. "As a matter of fact, although dealing with traitors to the cause of American liberty—Benedict Arnold and wife—it is a very interesting story. "The tale will recall to the reader ‘A Dream of an Empire’ and ‘Hugh Wynne,’ by Dr. Wier Mitchell of Philadelphia. In both books the ’Colonel,’ Benedict Arnold, had something to do. Major Andre, who also appears in the two stories, is a famil iar figure in American historical novels. " 'Pemberton; or One Hundred Years Ago,’ also deals very familiarly with the careers of General Howe and others, and aside from its historical interest, is well worth reading as a romance." Baseball Figures. "The following will give baseball ‘fans’ an idea of what Secretary Farrell of the National Association of Baseball clubs has to do during the course ,of one sett eon,’’ said Hooter Brown yesterday. "The association comprises twenty-nine leagues, with clubs In 191 cities. During last year Mr. Farrell received and an swered 9000 letters and 967 telegrams. In conducting the business of the associa tion $96,000 passed through his hands. He received and filed contracts of 4200 play ers; issued 244 temporary suspensions and 637 releases. Four hundred and ninety-one players were shifted from one club to an other by purchase. He received $30,100 dur ing the year as half of the draft price on players who will go to higher positions the coming season. "In recognition of his ability and ser vices the association re-elected him for the next five years and also made him ex-officio chairman of the board of arbi tration of the coming five years." Won’t Need ’Em. The action of the democratic state ex ecutive committee with reference to the election of alternate senators has set a prominent young man of this city to dreaming and if his dream signifies any thing Alabama will not need alternate senators for some years to come. Mr. R. W. Cobb in quoting this young man with reference to the dream, which is somewhat like Rip Van Winkle's exper ience, said: "I dreamed that I left Birmingham and was gone for quite a number of years and on my return found the city entirely changed. To my dismay I found that all but a few of the generation I had known were dead. I approached a person stand ing on the street corner to question him and we had been talking but a few min-' utes when five hearses passed along. "Whose funeral is that?" I asked. ' "That is the funeral of live of our prom inent citizens," was the reply. "And who are the dead?" i went on. "The first hearse contains the body of John B. Knox, the second W. C. Oates, the third Joseph F. Johnston, the fourth Rufus N. Rhodes and the last Jesse Stall ings," was the answer. "The names sounded familiar and after a few moments reflection I pointed to two old gray-liaircd gentlemen walking briskly beside one of the hearses, and 1 inquired who they were." "Oli! the one nearest us is R. VV. Pettus and the other is John T. Morgan," was the answer. Hale’s Impressions. "Birmingham's possibilities are unlim ited." remarked George C. Hale of Kan sas City. "I have traveled over the world. In the t’nited States from the Pacific to the Atlantic and from the shores of the Gulf of Mexico to the most remote cor ner of the country. In my opinion Bir mingham has the greatest future of any city in the country. "It might be asked why I make such an assertion. I do so from personal ob servation and what I believe to be a thorough knowledge of conditions here and elsewhere. Since my stay here, examin ing and investigating fire conditions from every point of view’, I have been over the city. This afternoon I was en route to North Birmingham with former Chief That! Mullln. I saw a charcoal fire in the woods and two blocks further away 1 a saw a $10,000 residence in course of con struction. Such conditions prevail all round the city. A condition of this kind means that the district and city are pros perous, and the citizens are in an ex cellent financial condition. "There is no reason why Birmingham should not within the next few years out distance all competitors in the iron and steel market. The mountains hereabouts have ore that will assay from 80 to 90 per cent pure. Steel can be manufactured at a less cost than anywhere In the coun try." Georgia Field Trials. "I was never In a more delightful com munity than is Waynesboro. Ua.. and never in my life met more hospitable peo ple than the Georgians are," said T. T. Ashford, who had just returned from the Georgia town, where he was the judge In the Georgia Field Trial club's annual meet. "From a sportsman's viewpoint, the meet was very successful. A number of fine dogs were entered, and some fine records were made. The Georgia quail shooters are ardent sportsmen, and a great deal of Interest was taken In the meet. "Hut I was more Impressed with the cordiality of the Waynesboro people than anything else In Georgia. The genuine an tebellum hospitality Is still dispensed." BOB THACH'S SPEECH BY SEYMOUR RANSOM. In an editorial article extending throughout more than a column, the Montgomery Advertiser of yesterday charges that The Age-Herald represen tative’s report of Tuesday's proceedings of the democratic state committee was “a misrepresentation of facts.” The Adver tisers adds that this “misrepresentation” is so “patent” that it feels “called upon to expose the way in which the truth had been tampered with.” In support of its charges the Advertiser prints both the report of Mr. Thach’s speech, which appeared in The Age-Her ald of Wednesday, and the report of the speech which was made by the official stenographer of the committee. Mr. Pat McCauley. In commenting on what it alleges to be radical differences In these two reports, the Advertiser says that “to put it mildly, the report published in The Age-Herald Is astonishing when it is laid side by side with the official stenographic report.” Continuing In this vein, the Advertiser says: "In fact, from top to bottom, from side to side, the official report is different from the distortion which appear* in the report of the Birmingham (Age-Herald’s) staff man. The difference is there for every man to see. * * * The Age-Herald has heartily endorsed the Whitson plan. Its staff correspondent has attacked it, and misrepresented the committee that adopted it.” These are assuredly sweeping charges. If true, they reflect unhappily upon the intelligence and fidelity of The Age-Her ald’s representative at Montgomery Tuos-" day. If unwarranted—well, that is a sub ject that most Interests the Advertiser. Are the charges true? Let the testimony of two of Jefferson county’s three members of the democratic state committee—Mr. Jones G- Moore and Capt. Ben F. Roden—answer the ques tion! Mr. Moore wns not only a member of the state committee that met at 'Mont gomery; he was also a member of the sub-committee that reported "the pri mary election plan." If there is any one who would be ac cepted as a competent authority regard ing the accuracy of the report made by The Age-Hcrald's representative—If there Is any one who would have reason to be offended by any “attack" upon or any "misrepresentation” of the democratic state committee—Mr. Jones G. Moore sprely would be the man. What does Mr. Moore say regarding thd virulent charges made upon The Age Herald's representative by the Montgom ery Advertiser? In a communication sent last night to The Age-Herald, Mr. Moore says: “I attended all the &sslons of the state committee at Montgomery. I heard every word of Mr. Thach's speech. I listened to it attentively. I read also the report of It that appeared In The Age-Herald of Tuesday. "When I read that report I, thought it was in all essentials, an accurate report of what Mr. Thach had said. There was nothing In The Age-Herald's report of Mr. Thach's speech that offended me as a member of the state committee', and there was nothing in It which, I think, could give offence to any other member of the tjommtttee. "I have since read the stenographic re port of Mr. Thach’s speech as printed on the editorial page of today's (Friday’s) Montgomery Advertiser. While the phraseology of that report differs some what from The Age-Herald's report there Is. so far as I can see, no difference in meaning between the two reports. There is certainly nothing in The Age-Herald's report to which any objection might be reasonably made, "I make tills statement both In my per sonal capacity as a newspaper reader and In my official capacity as a member of the state committee, and I make it glad ly and voluntarily.” Capt. Ben F. Roden was and is also a member of the state committee. Captain Roden's testimony will surely be accepted as trustworthy by everyone who knows him. He Is not In the habit of making in accurate statements. He Is surely com petent to understand an inaccurate state ment when It Is made by another. He would be swift to detect and to resent "distortion of words," "misrepresentation of facts" and "tampering with truth." Incidentally, It might be added, he was maimed for life at Shiloh lighting in de fense of the truth and the right. What docs Captain Roden say regarding the charges made by the Advertiser? Here is a statement signed by Captain Roden and sent last night to The Age Herald: "1 heard Mr. Thach's speech. I read The Age-lleralU's report of that speech. 1 thought The Age-Hcrald's report was sub stantially accurate and comprehensive, and I think so still. "I have since read the official sten ographer's report of Mr. Thach's speech, and I have re-read The Agu-Herald's re port of it. There is, in my Judgment, no material difference in the two reports." Mr. R. H. Thach, the third member of the state committee from Jefferson coun ty, was not In Birmingham yesterday. It 1s not unreasonable to suppose that could his testimony be obtained, it would agree with that presented by Mr. Moore and Captain Roden. The name that leads this article is the name of the newspaper m^n who wrote In The Age-Herald, the report to which the Advertiser has vehemently, if not vir tuously, taken exception. That newspaper man has no desire to engage unneces sarily in a con|roversy with any other member of the profession. On an earlier occasion, when a question of accuracy arose between his reports and those printed in the Advertiser, he was content to remain silent, satisfied that, though the Advertiser then Insinuated he had been guilty of inaccuracy, developments would verify the truthfulness of his reports; and developments have verified their truthfulness. It has been a rule of his newspaper life to correct an error prompt ly when conscious that one had by him been made, and It has been a rule of his newspaper life also to treat with In difference any attempt made to misrepre sent his conduct, when conscious that he was right, knowing that misrepresenta tion, however plausible, reacts ultimately upon him who is guilty of it. , In this case, however, he has been per suaded to deviate from the latter rule, and he has been persuaded to do so for the reason that the charges, though proven by the testimony of Mr. Moore and Cap tain Roden to be unsupported by truth, were presented by the Advertiser in a form that was likely to mislead and to deceive (he uninformed. The Age-Herald’s representative can not escape the feeling that the Adver tiser has made these latest charges in a futile effort to substantiate similar COMMENTS ON MEN AND MATTERS OF THE WORLD II OMBHOW, I always feel sorry] for the man who has never —* had a nickname," remarked Col. Biff. "It means that his friends are few, that he has been] denied the charm of fellowship and cpmi*aderle that bright ens the lives of more fortunate men. He may be great, he may be famous and dwell on the heights but there Is a void in his life If there Is no term of affection by which he Is known among hts Inti mates. Often a nickname is senseless, often it is foolish and absurd, but it is priceless. What a host of pleasant recol lections hover about the names that are beStowed sometimes In jest and cling to a man through life! They recall golden moments spent in the companionship of genial fellows; they attest a man’s popu larity and prove big worth. A nickname given in hate is to be feared, but a nick name given in affection is to bo cherished for life.” A CINCH. The easiest thing In the world to do Is to get In debt And 'then feel blue. A contemporary has a department call ed "What People Talk About.” Their neighbors, of course. You may be able to make back the money you lose but there Is no way to set back the time you lose. The war with Japan cost Russia $1,050, 000,000. After looking over these figures we are convinced that war Is more ex pensive than Christmas. MORE ADVICE. Dives of rich men oft remind us That wo can't deny the facts: When we stray from paths of virtue We should cover up our tracks. An Indiana farmer made his wife stand on a hot stove with bare feet, beat her half to death, tore off her clothes and threw her Into a cellar where she was confined for several weeks. A man like that makes us respect the devil. A Pennsylvania man went to drown a black cat. The cat came back but the man was drowned. The moral of this lit tle story, brief tho it be, Is that a cat has to be drowned nine times but a man drowns only once. Ten thousand bags of peanuts were "devoured” by the flames at Norfolk. They would have met the same fate at a circus or a baseball game. MUCH BETTER. (A town in Indiana has been named after George Ade.) A town has been named for Humorist . Ade, 'Tls better thus, by far To have a whole town named after one Than Just a cheap cigar. Datto William Jennings Bryan of Min danao is positively the only Filipino chief tain in the world corresponding for Amer ican newspapers. Read his dope. A quiet man sidled Into a local refresh ment stand and called for some whisky. There was a look of expectancy In his eyes and hts mouth was puckered. He slipped his fingers tenderly around the neck of the bottle, held It up to the light, gloated over it a bit and then poured eut a stiff drink. Before he drank the liquor he gazed at the glass for a moment and then drained it as quick as a wink. A smile played about the corners of his mouth and a look of Ineffable peace spread over his face. As he reached for Ills change a man who had been observing hint with an amused smile remarked, "Now that Is what I call appreciation.” MORE EXCITING. Idttle Willie had a sled On which he liked to ride But little Willie much preferred To see the landslide. A negro was lynched by seventy men at Moscow. The town Is In Texas but is living up to its name right along. Since Senator Depew has been “unavoid ably detained” Andrew Carnegie and Mark Twain have been working overtime to keep tile country in a good humor. Both gentlemen are first class humorists. The only difference is that Mark is a professional and Andrew is only an ama teur. LTPE'S SUNSHINE. I.ittle rills of laughter Plowing from the heart Help a man to labor And to do his part. The robins will soon go north and base ball teams from t^ie north will wing their way to the south for the annual spring practice. A Birmingham department store re cently distributed about 10,000 pocket mir rors, each bearing a different number. The number of each mirror and the cus tomer to whom it was given were regis tered for the purpose of distributing prizes to those holding winning numbers. A citizen recently had two coats stolen and the only clue left behind by Raffle* was one of these souvenirs. The citizen is now trying to locate the thief by look ing up the list of persons holding mirrors and the number opposite each name. You see the drift, of course. Make way, Sher lock Holmes, for a real detective! A WORD TO THE LADY PHILAN THROPIST. While building homes for errant cats And dogs out in the cold, Don’t overlook the children, dear— If we may make so bold. The fact that William Randolph Hearst shot a lion in Mexico tends to strengthen the belief that he has designs on the presidency. Before the Senate starts to curb the President it would be well to find some one who is willing to bell the cat. DOESN’T LOSE ANY. Why is the old owl deemed so wise? Faith, I think it is this way: Tho he says up every night He can sleep all the next day. Kansas and Missouri need not feel that they are the only states in the union menaced by Standard Oil. The kerosene octopus is a universal affliction. THE WISE ONES. Everywhere you Go these days, On the seas and The highways. You find chaps who Think they know How this old world Ought to go. ! “While some of us manage to come in under the wire, most of the entries in the race of life are left somewhere 'round the- post,” remarked a philosopher. “Usually this is the result of a false start, but fouls are often responsible for those who fail to 'show.' ” FaUL COOK. charges made by it at an earlier time. On that occasion Mr. B. B. Comer, by a stroke of the pen, riddled the vicious and vitiating accusations made by the Advertiser precisely as Mr. Moore and Captain Roden have, by their fore going statements, demolished the charges presented by the Advertiser In this case. In conclusion, it is sufficient to state that the representative of The Age-Her ald is quite content to rest his reputation for accuracy and rectitude upon the testi mony of men like Mr. Moore and Captain Roden. PLAN ENDORSED The Mobile Item: The stato democratic executive committee at its meeting in Montgomery yesterday placed itself on record as favoring the election of United Slates senators by popular vote. This Is a step in the right direction. This elec tion of successors to Senators Morgan and Pettus may he a question Incidental to this action, but this Is a matter of secondary Importance to that of giving practical endorsement to the popular method of electing United States senators, a. political move which must have an im petus from somewhere and be pushed forward vigorously by its- advocates In every state with the ultimate end In view of securing an amendment to the constitution of the United States provid ing that the members of the upper house of Congress shall be chosen directly by the people of each state. Any senator elected In any state on the plan adopted by the Alabama committee should stand pledged, If elected, to vote In the United States Senate for an amendment to the federal constitution which shall meet the demand for the election of senators by the voters themselves. No state In the union today is better represented than Alabama In'-.the United States Senate. Morgan and Pettus may have their peers but their superiors can not be found In any two senators repre senting a'state, and so long as they are in the Senate the interests of not only of Alabama but that of the democratic party of the country will be most ably cham pioned, and upon the floor of the 8enate the principle of the election of senators by the people, directly, Instead of by the It glslatures, indirectly, will be found two senators capable of quickening this move ment toward its final consummation. Sylacauga Progress: The action of the state democratic executive committee meets the hearty approval of The Pro gress In e\erf particular, and this paper has no ‘'kick.” The senatorshlp proposi tion was the most important question be fore the committee, und that was handled admirably well. We cannot overlook the fact that our two United States senators are old men. Yet they are able, and will faithfully represent the state, if permitted to do so, until the end of their lives. Cer tain It is that they cannot live always, and it was well to provide against their pass ing away. Now the people are to be permitted to express choice as to who shall succeed Morgan and Pettus in case the end of their existence shall cause vacancies. This id well. Cent rev ills Press: Senator Pettus need have little fear of opposition* the old sol diers' and the sons of these old soldiers who fought with him on many a field of battle are not ready to turn him down. The nervy politician who goes up against him is going to find that he has an op ponent worthy of his steel. His opponent need not come to Bibb for consolation. Mobile Item: Morgan and Pettus are not weaklings, seeking sympathetic tears. As the News says they are “alive and ac tive,” and they are not wearing dead men's shoes. So alive and active, in fact, they not only expect re-election, but so much so they expect to live long enough to laugh at their friends who are busy ing themselves filling two pairs of old shoes with eye water. A LIVELY CATCH. From Harper's Weekly. Mrs. S.—"And so you are leaving us, Bridget? And what are you going to do?” Bridget—"Please, mum, I'm going to get married." Mrs. S.—“Dear me! Isn't that rather sudden? Who Is the happy man?" Bridget—“Do you remember, mum, roe askin’ you about four weeks ago to go to the funeral of a friend? Well, 1 do b« goin’ to marry tile corpse's husband. Sure, he told me then I wins the life o’ the party." ONE TEST. , From the New York Herald. Contemporary asks, "Can a gentleman swear?" Step on his corns. DOVER BEACH. By Matthew Arnold. The sea is calm tonight. The tide is full, the moon lies fair Upon tHe straits—on the French coast the light Gleams and is gonei the cliffs of England stand. Glimmering and vast, out'In the tranquil bay. Come to the window, sweet is the night air! Only, from the long line of spray Where the sea meets the moon-blanch’d land, Listen! you hear the grating roar Of pebbles which the waves draw back, and fling, At their return, up the high strand, Begin and cease, an$ then again begin. With tremulous cadence slow, and bring The eternal note of sadness In. Sophocles long ago Heard It on the Aegean, and it brought Into his mind the turbid ebb aniyflow Of human misery.; we Find also in the sound a thought, Hearing it by the distant northern sea. Tfie Sea of Faith Was once, too, at the full, and round earth’s shore Lay like the folds of a bright girdl* furl’d. But now I only hear It melancholy, long, withdrawing roar. Retreating, to the breath Of the night-wind, down the vast edge* drear And naked shingles of the world. Ah! love, let us he true To one another! for the world, which seems / To lie before us like a land, of dreams. So various, so beautiful, so new. Hath really neither joy, nor love, nor light. Nor certitude, nor peace, nor help for pain; And we are here as on a darkling plain Swept with confused alarms of struggle and flight, Where Ignorant armies clash by night.