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The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, March 04, 1906, Image 16

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•t. W. SARRRTT. Editor
Entered at the Birmingham, Ala., post
office as second-class matter under act
of Congress March 3, 1879.
Dally and Sunday Age-Herald.$8.HO
Daily and Sunday, per month.TD
Sunday Age-Herald, per annum.2.00
Weekly Age-Hernld. per annum.1.00
Subscription payable In advance.
L. H. Russ. C. G. Witt and J. F. Keeley
are the only authorized traveling repre
sentatives of The Age-Herald in its cir
culation department.
No communication will he published
without its author’s name. Rejected man
uscripts will not be returned unless
stamps are enclosed for that purpose.
Remittances ran be made at current
••ate of exebangp. The Age-Herald will
not be responsible for money sent through
the mails. Address
Birmingham, Ala.
Eastern business office, rooms 48 to 50,
Inclusive, Tribune building. New York
City; western business office, Tribune
building. Chicago. The R. C. Beckwith
Special Agency, agents foreign advertis
Washington Bureau Age-Herald 1421 G
street. N. W.
For, boy, however we do praise our
, selves,
Our fancies are more giddy and unfirm,
More longing, wavering, sooner lost
and won,
Than women’s are.
—Twelfth Night.
Meridian’s Misfortune.
The whirling windstorm, or tornado,
Is a feature of our broad country, and
no one knows when or where one of
them will scour the face of the earth,
dealing death and destruction as it
goes. As a rule storms of that nature
stay In midair, but now and then they
lilt the solid earth, and then sudden
and deep trouble is sure to come.
The people of prosperous Meridian
have felt a visitation not unlike that
which blew through St. Louis not
many years ago. Louisville had a like
visitation, and even Birmingham, up
among the north Alabama hills, has
mot been wholly exempt.
There seems to he no way to ward
off the death-dealing circling winds,
but the stronger houses are con
structed the less readily are they
thrown down by tornadoes. The frail
buildings in which negroes generally
find shelter are deathtraps when such
storms strike them. Better buildings
ere needed, hul no building Is perhaps
tornado-proof. Life Is, however, more
secure in a strong building.
The sympathy of two states at least
Is freely extended to the sufferers
from the tornado in Meridian, and if
need be that sympathy will take sub
stantial form. Whenever Meridian
says outside help will be accepted,
plenty of it will be forthcoming.
Race Frictien in the Nnr!|i.
The New York Commercial says
"there must be something peculiarly
lawless in the make-up of Springfield,
Ohio.” That city is, however, no more
peculiar than New York has been on
several occasions under like circum
stances, or Chicago, or Indianapolis,
'i ue spreading of the negro race over
the country creates friction, and the
„ outbreaks “between I he hoodlum
whites and toe depraved blacks" at
Springfield, O.. is hut an example of
what will occur elsewhere as the black
population is evenly distributed in all
the cities of the country.
Springfield is In Clark county, and
that county has just about 60,000 pop
ulation, twelve per cent of whom are
negroes. In Springfield are about 40,
00(1 people, and about 6000 of them are
negroes. The county contains In other
words Just about its proportion of the
negro population of the country. When
ever a northern city holds its ultimate
proportion of negroes, there race fric
tion will arise. 14, is inevitable, and
the New York Commercial Is there
fore mistaken in saying there is some
thing peculiarly lawless in the make
up of Springfield. The only peculiarity
in the case is the early arrival of
Springfield's quota. Other northern
cities will after a while receive their
respective quotas, and then the troubles
of Springfield will be duplicated. They
will become widespread, and .in the
long run no state will he exempt—no
city at any rate.
Premature flctien Unwise.
The Richmond Evening Journal and
the New Orleans Daily States ask
southern politicians to get together in
spirit and to meet soon in body at
some central city in the south to form
’ ulate plans to secure the nominataion
of a southern man for the presidency
at the next national democratic con
Stripped of all disguises this means
that tne democrats cannot win in 1908.
It is much too early to make anj such
confession. The country is full of un
rest. Change and independency are in
the air. In the apparent prosperity
the wage earner in some cases is op
pressed. He draws large pay, but his
money has less buying pow-er. He is
discontented, and no one knows what
he will do in 1908. No one knows what
Congress will omit to do. No one in
1906 can, in short, see what the situa
tion in 1908 will be.
The proposed meeting should at any I
rate be postponed to March, 1908, when
there will be time enough to formulate
all the plans that may appear to be
needed. No one knows in 1906 what
will be best in 1908, and if all that is
left of the democratic party is in the
south, as the Daily States says, the
south can have its way even if it does
not, formulate a plan until March. 190S.
The Evening Journal docs in fact say
it is only necessary for the south to
unite and make a demand in order to
get it.__ '
Blue and* the Gray.
The first national meeting of the
"Blue and the Gray” took place in St.
bonis in 1904. Its plans and purposes
were there explained, and public senti
ment endorsed the movement. It seeks
to bring together the veterans of both
sides in the civil war, and doubtless,
too, their sons and daughters.^
The second reunion was held in
Washington, but on March 27 of this
year the men In blue will meet the
men in gray on the latter’s ground in
Atlanta. The movement has national
bearings, and the belief is that, it will
prove a deep impulse to a perfected
union of the states.
The special feature of the Atlanta
reunion will consist in honors to the
memory of Gen. Joe Wheeler, who
stood especially for the Blue and the
Gray. The Wheeler memorial has been
carefully planned, and the hope is en
tertained that President Roosevelt will
be able to be present, Gen. Stephen D.
Lee, commanding the United Confed
erate Veterans, will be there, so will
Corporal Tanner, commander of the
Grand Army of the Republic. The At
lanta reunion promises to be the most
Interesting and significant one of the
new movement.
Return *f the Players.
The preliminary or training games of
the baseball season of 1906 will be
begun this week, and the Interest in
the favorite outdoor pastime shows no
signs of diminution. Baseball Is em
phatically the national gujne, even to
a greater extent than cgjcket is in
England, or polo in France, or tennis
elsewhere. It is a better spectacle
than any of the other outdoor sports,
and in that way more people can enjoy
It and to some extent share In It. They
do at any rate express their opinions
as the games go along, and they do not
whisper those opinions as a rule.
Perhaps the best feature of the ap
proaching season in the south is the
promise of well-balanced teams. It is
not believed that any team will have
a walkover in any league in the south.
This promises better sport, and
if the outlook at. the beginning
is fulfilled it will lead to in
creased interest. Ihroughout the season.
When a team walks away from all the
rest In a league all are thereby In
jured. This was the case last year In
the National league, as well as In the
Southern league. It may be repeated,
hut expert observers say a snugger
race for the pennant of 1906 may rea
sonably be expected in all the leagues
in the country.
A preacher declared that the domestic
life of this nation Is menaced by bach
elors. It Is surprising how comfortable
we get along these, days In Bptte of the
perils and menaces which confront us
on every side.
For the Hist time In twenty-two months
Uncle Sam Is receiving more money in
twelve months than he pays out. and ho
may have a modest surplus at the end of
the fiscal year.
While Missouri is trying to make H. H.
Rogers testify Senator Morgan Is endeav
oring to unravel the story of Fttiiama now
in the exclusive keeping of William Nel
son Cromwell.
when H. H. Rogers Is nvjt testifying he
Is studying the role of Cromwell. He Is
thinking and when he Is thinking he
should remember Cardinal Wolsay and hta
Knabenshue has a device which he
claims will revolutionise aeronautics. If
he can perfect a device that will stay In
the air he will have done enough.
Cromwell considers himself greater than
the government, chiefly because some of
the trust senators are trying to help
him out of a predicament.
Attorney Cromwell boasts that he has
more money than he needs. He certainly
has more Panama secrets than he is will
ing to unfold.
At last we know how Engineer Wallace
will earn that salary of $50,000 a year.
He will build electric roads for George
General Grosvenor will not notice the
change from Congress to private life, for
he is to become the attorney of a natural
gas company.
It is not so much the negro problem
as the mob problem that Springfield, tlie
home of J. Warren Keifer, has on its
When New York is under the surface
honey-combed with subways the subpoena
servers' tasks will be beyond their pow
The manager of the Waldorf-Astoria
has a million dollars In his wallet, and
he Is going out of the hotel business.
Bernhardt’s “Camille’’ certainly shows
that tuberculosis Is not by any moans a
foe of long and pleasant living.
The Panama canal has driven the mos
quito from the canai zone, and New Jer
sey may yet have to dig one.
The glamour Is wearing off Standard Oil
Aldrich, and he bids fair to stand before
the country for what he is.
Witte promises to stay in office until
the douma meets, when Russia will go on
the constitutional basis.
The Kaiser’s moustache is still assertive
and warlike, and this means that Alge
clras will be a failure.
Edna Wallace Opper has discovered a
passionate musician who is advertising
her art immensely.
Archbishop Farley says it is absurd to
kill people at the age of slxtjl. Of course,
add. cruel, too.
Frances Jospeh is beset by troubles, and
he must begin to wish emperors had a
retiring age.
John A. McCall leaves an estate of
"over $20,000." The figures preach an elo
quent sermon.
Col. Mann offers $1C00 to charity if any
one will prove that he has been black
As the robins fly north the baseball
players fiit southward. The simile ends
The McCurdys went b^t they bccupled
the imperial suite on the Amerika.
Mlchalek of Illinois will keep his seat
In Congress In spite of his name.
Cromwell’s memory is as bad ns that
of an Insurance official under fire.
Rogers. Rockefeller and Cromwell are
our suppressers of official truth.
France is trying to establish at Algeclras
her African Monroe Doctrine.
General Grosvenor is kept busy resent
ing his official obituaries.
Mrs. Yerkes’ husbands and millions are
uncertain quantities.
"The Clansman" in Springfield, Ohio!
From the Washington Post.
Gen. Charles M. Shelley of Birmingham.
Ala., who has many friends in Washing
ton, is at the New Willard, lie was for
four terms a member of Congress, and j
served as auditor of the treasury for the
interior department under Mr. Cleveland.
In conversation with a Post reporter Gen
eral Shelley said:
"One of the greatest of proposed polit
ical reforms is that advocated so ably by
Hon. Perry Belmont, providing for pub
licity in compaign contributions and ex
penditures. I was a member of the House
when Mr. Belmont was chairman of the
foreign affairs committee and I am pleased
to notice such a man devoting his ener
gies and talents to such a good cause, i
have no hesitation In Indorsing any plan
which will make public the sources of
contributions and tiie mode of expend
ing money for elections. I believe It is
time for Congress to act, and from what
I have heard In recent Journeying*
throughout the south and west I believe,
the great mass of citizens are In favor
of ihe enactment of the pending publicity
bill into law."
From til's Knoxville Sentinel.
Another grand old southern statesman
at Washington is John T. Morgan of
Alabama, who in spite of his eighty-two
years, is one of the giants of the Senate
in intellect and debate. Ho is hading In
the examination of William Nelson Crom
well, he of the many canal Jobs, and in
spite of the shrewdness and reticence
of the witness, has brought out many
interesting facts. Ira E. Bennett, in the
Washington Post, contrasts the two:
Mr. Cromwell is fifty-two years old,
with his natural gifts trained to their
highest pitch. Mr. Morgan is 82 years old.
suffering from rheumatism and tremulous
with ingrmity. Both are lawyers of wide
experience, one accustomed to handling
great financial and diplomatic matters,
the other long renowned as a lawmaker.
The corporation lawyer Is rich. The
statesman is poor. The younger man is
the incarnation of the modern system of
high finance. The older man Is the In*
carnation of old-fashioned ideals of plain
living and high thinking.
Mr. Cromwell Is cunning; Mr. Morgan
is subtle. One is quick, resourceful, and
imaginative; the other Is equipped with
an amazing memory, a trained Intellect,
and perseverance that knows no turning.
The younger man at the beginning of
the struggle looked upon his interroga
tor with commiseration for his great ago,
but before lie had been under fire long
lie gave evidence of great embarrassment
in trying to dodge the old man's relent
less thrusts. He had found his match in
The south is ably represented In the
Senate. The men who have been tried
and not found wanting should be con
tinued in office.
London Stock Exchange.
London, March 3.—Operators oh the
Stock Exchange experienced a somewhat
distressing week, being engaged in dis
posing of the wreckage from the settle
ment while further declines in kaffirs
revived fears of difficulties during the
forthcoming settlement. Towards the
week end tlie influx of gold into the Bank j
of England and the better feeling in ,
regard to the Moroccan situation combin
ed with the monetary position showing
signs of growing easiness imparted
strength to the gilt-edged Bection and
better prices for the week's close firm.
Foreigners reflected the varying moods
of the continental bourses and finished
with a steady tone after early weakness
which was most pronounced in the Rus
sians. Heavy selling of Japanese early
ii* the week for American account caus
ed a weakness of recent issues, but those
participated in the steadier closing to
Americans have been feverish, largely
dominated by the bears’ endeavor to force j
prices down, helped by the revival of
dear money and the talk about crop scar
city and mining troubles. Union Pacific ,
fluctuated widely on bonus distribution
rumors, and at the finish shares about
unchanged, while several active issues
showed a net loss of one to two dollars.
From tlie New York Press.
If a gird’s father doesn’t like a man
she is sure he is nice.
One sure w*av to be popular with your
friends is to think they arc.
If men took on years as slowly as wo
men no girl would ever get out of baby
A woman has to <jhave a mighty pretty
hand not to think lt» looks prettier all
covered up with rings.
Unless a girl has on her best stockings
she looks awful scared in f#he photo
graoh taken of her head. i
Father Duffy.
The Rev. Father Duffy, who ranks ex
ceptionally high as a preacher and a man
of letters, will begin a series of Ja?nten
sermons at high mass at St. Paul s
church today. He w’as educated at May
nooth college and according to a well
known saying every master of that
famous institution is entitled to have
wrlten after his name, S. G.,—scholar and
gentleman. It was Father Duffy s poem,
“Low of the Siege Train,” which ap
peared in The Age-Herald of last Sunday
and which was much praised by literary
Those who have heard Father Duffy in
the pulpit speak of his English as at once
terse and polished and 'his oratory as a
specimen of t'he best modern school—mov
ing but not ranting; fervid, but not
florid; dramatic but not "stagey.
The eloquent priest is chaplain a£ tile
East I>ake orphanage. He lives all alone
in a large old wooden building in a shady
grove—an Ideal rookery for a thinker,
student and writer.
The Turn-Verein.
4‘The Birmingham Turn-Verein is doing
excellent educative wTork in its musical
and literary entertainments.” said a cul
tured citizen.“The programmes are in
variably attractive and an address or
paper by some prominent citizen Is al
ways a feature. A number of notable ad
dresses have been made tills season un
der the auspices of the Turn-Verein.”
The speaker on tonight's programme
will be Mr. Bowron, and his theme will
be: "Ancient Faiths and Modern Dis
Prosperous Georgia.
Col. Samuel C. Dunlap of Gainesville,
Qa., commissioner of the Georgia bureau
of industries and immigration, is in Bir
mingham as the guest of 'his son, James
T. Dunlap, manager of the National Life
Insurance company.
Colonel Dunlap was United States mar
shal under Cleveland’s second adminis
tration. He 1st highly esteemed and widely
"Georgia was never more prosperous
than now," said Colonel Dunlap. "Our
farmers, our merchants, our manufactu
rers and our railroads are alike enjoying
great prosperity.
"The bureau which 1 represent Is sup
ported by the railroads and is doing sub
stantial good. It has brought many de
sirable immigrants to Georgia and has
fostered many solid Industries.
"The railroads, as everybody knows,
are our greatest developers. What they
have added to the values of the south
cannot be overestimated and the people
should not be slow In appreciating fully
tlie work of the big railway companies."
Then and Now.
“I passed through 'Birmingham a quar
ter of a century ago,” said John B.
Smathers of Houston, Tex., Inst night,
at the Hillman hotel. "I stopped here
two days at that time, when the boom
was on. I had nothing but ambition and
a willingness to work, so I could make
no investments. My cousin was with me,
however, and he had something Iprs than
$1000, which he spent in real estate. He
died three years or so ago, and when
his local holdings were sold to settle up
the estate they brought over $30,000.
”1 firmly believe the executors of the
estate made a mistake when they sold
the property,” continued Mr. Smathers.
‘Some of it is located in the very heart
of th« residence section on the northside
of the city, and I am of the opinion that
if the estate were to ofTer it for sale now
twice $80,000 would easily be obtained.
“It is hardly necessary for me to Bay
what I think of Birmingham and its pros
pects. ufter my acquaintance with the
manner In which real estate values have
increased. The value of land in any city
is about the last to feel prosperity and
its effects, while at the same time it i9
about the first to feel the effects of busi
ness depression, so when it is considered
that Birmingham real estate is still climb
ing higher it is safe to assume that the
city and the surrounding country is en
joying prosperity.”
The Turf.
“The Alabama state law is as fair as
most any 1 have known of relative to race
tracks.” said Jacob H. Ryan of Chicago
last night. Mr. Ryan is Interested iu the
racing game, and spent several hours in
Birmingham yesterday between trains,
stopping at the Hotel Birmingham.
“I have been to Birmingham several
times, and each time I have been Impress
ed with the signs of growth and prosperi
ty on every hand. I am of the opiniot^
that one of the two racing associations in
the west, the Western Jockey club and
the American Turf association, could
make a good thing by holding a meeting
here each year, in the fall.
“A Meeting to last two weeks, in my
opinion, would he a success financially
and otherwise, and I believe local capital
could be Interested sufficiently to build
a track and erect the necessary buildings.
The races would help the city in many
ways, especially by putting much money
in circulation in this section.”
About Persons.
Marsh Redon of New Orleans is at tUe
* * •
L. Goldstein of Anniston is at the Hill
• • •
Charles P. Klapper of Andalusia Is at
the Birmingham.
• * *
William B. Amherst of Scranton, Miss.,
is at the Morris.
* • •
J. K. Spears of Montgomery is at the
• * *
M. M. Marks of Selma is at the St.
• • •
Kudus Armstrong of Tuscaloosa is at
the St. Nicholas.
• • •
Charles M. Vogt of Cullman is at the
* • •
Andrew Burgholter of Mobile is at the
* * *
'B. It. Richter of Pensacola is at the
Charles C. Carlsson of New Orleans is
at the Birmingham. Mr. Carlsson is a
cotton buyer representing Norwegian and
English mills, but is on his way to New
Orleans from his foreign home, having
slopped in Birmingham only over night.
* • «
Hurry J. Kimball of Cincinnati is at
the Birmingham.
Special to the New York World.
Y\ mated. Conn., March 1.—A barber in
Thomaston has posted the following in
his shop: “Icemen must pay double
price for a shave, owing to the long faces
tluy wear."
XOTHER political campaign has
\W| opened up In Alabama. It is the
" ■ same old Benatorship proposi
tion. The state democratic executive com
mittee has been called to meet in Mont
gomery on Tuesday, March 13. The pur
pose of the meeting is to make provision
for the nomination of a chief justice of
the supreme court. S. D. Weakley, of
Birmingham, has already been appointed
to this position by the governor, to hold
office until a successor is elected.
The nomination for his successor, which
is practically the election, will probably
be in August. It will be done in con
vention and not in primary. In primary
senators and prospective senators are to
be nominated.
In this meeting of the state executive
committee on the 13th a contest is to
be made. It is to be to set aside, or
rather to amend the action of the last
meeting of the committee In regard to
the selection of senators and prospective
senators who might be eligible to appoint
ment in event of vacancy.
The wits of Alabama have been at work
and at first It was “who would get out
Into the woods and return with the shoes
left vacant therein.” Now the wits are
describing the seekers for succession as
birds of prey, or rather birds wTho hover
and sail about watching for the faithful
or lame old horse that is merely hobbling
about and expecting to fall at any mo
* ♦ ♦ ♦ |
At any rate, the wits, the serious and
the ambitious are making much ado about
this senatorial succession business and
there is really more politics and more
strenuous energy being exerted by a num
l^pr of men than has been known in1
Alabama politic* for many years.
The story now is that under the plan
adopted some weeks ago by the state
executive committee, two aspiring poli
ticians, one of whom has always been
ready to respond to a political fire alarm,
however lame he might be at the time;
and another who has heretofore only
been honored with complimentary posi
tions In politics, have a material advant
age. Therefore, the other fellows want
to change the plan. As a matter of fact,
the people of the state simply desire to
see that every man who has senatorial,
aspirations has a fair show. There is
no reason why a member of congress
should not have the nerve not only to
enter a primary contest before the peo
ple in his district to succeed himself,
but at the same time enter a contest
of the entire.state to recommend him for .
senatorial succession in the event of a
vacancy. , 1 .
The action of the state executive com
mittee may not have been by any means
perfect. It was not. But the commit
tee merely acted in a way which pro
vided for the people to express them
selves as to succession In thd senate
should a vacancy occur between sessions
of the legislature, which, has been fixed
by the constitution of the state at four
years apart.
The state committee simply desired to
prevent a combination made for the pur
pose of a division of the spoils of politi
cal Alabama.
Just what is( going to he done at the
March meeting of the committee remains
to be seen. Certain it Is that several
active coteries of enthusiastic politicians
will be present and efforts are now be
ing made to bring about a change in the
senatorial succession matter.
This man Nelson Cromwell, who has
figured so conspicuously In Panama canal
matters, seems npt only to be antagon
izing the senate Investigating commit
tee and exceedingly discourteous to Sen
ator Morgan, but seems to assume an air
of executive authority and power which
appears like unto that formerly assumed
by some of the recent deposed heads of
the great life Insurance societies. It Is
very manifest that Mr. Nelson Cromwell
had delegated to him paramount powers
by the chief executive of this country In
handling Panama affairs. And It may
be that Senator Morgan knows more
about Ills assumption of plenary powers
than has been developed up to date.
Mr. Cromwell Is a very able man and
has made a great deal of money In his
life. Senator Morgan seems to be anxious
to know whether lie made anything in ex
cess of reasonable fees and perquisites
out of his handling the Panama canal
matters for the United States govern
ment. It Is very manifest that the Ala
bama senator Is boring deep.
What he will find remains to be seen.
Tlds Chinese question is going to be a
serious one. Millions of dollars worth of
American manufactured goods have been
annually shipped and sold to China. And
it Is a known fact that the Chfnaman
pays his bills more promptly than any
other man in the world. I w'ould venutre
the assertion that of all the goods shipped
to China from America within the past
| twenty years the losses have not been
one-tenth of 1 per cent. The Chinese
merchant's word is as good as hie bond,
and it is the rarest of Instances where
he would take advantage of any tech
nicality whatsoever.
As it Is now, the Chinese merchants j
and business men have formed an alii- j
anco among thern&elves to boycott Ameri
can goods because of the fact that the
American government continues to boy
cott the Chinese people.
For more than ten years, we have ex
cluded the Chinaman. Thfe Chinese la
borer cannot come to thlsi^ country, and It
is really difficult ' for- thA Chinese mer
chant or tourist, however much he may
be worth/ to be admitted pur scores.
At tli© same time we seek and bring
Into this counfry the rabble and the
criminals of every other cotSritry on the
fac*e of the earth. The Afiij&fcn pV the
Fiji islander may come in aj wllf The
loweBt type Italian dr Sicilian may land
upon our1 shores and have fro# Access to
every part of this country. - Yet the
Chinaman Is excluded. Therefore, it is
but natural that the Chinese jpf ability
should assert themselves attd exercise
their rights In their own way. They are
not excluded from any other country in
the world, and Amerkya excludes no j
other people than the Chih#pe. As a mat
ter of fact, if we are determined to keep ]
the Chinese away from ust we ought to
keep away from them. Instead of send
ing armies over there to Protect our
citizens and demand that thv should go
Into any part of China that they see fit
to enter, we ought to ree&ll our people
or else open our doors to their people.
♦ ♦ ♦
T^ots of people in Birmingham have
been complaining recently about the
torn-up condition of the streets. It Is
a bit unpleasant to have thfc streets
torn up so much, but It Is an evidence
of Improvement and prosperity. The
town that never has its streets torn up
is a slow one. You can't pave streets
unle99 you tear them up; nor can you <
put in new water and gas pipes nor
'build street car tracks.
As a matter of fact, while all the work
which has been done in Birmingham dur
ing the past year 'has not been accom
plished with that speed w-* some of
us would like, at the same time the ac
complished improvements speak volumes 1
for themselves. I hope to see every un
paved street and sidewalk in Birmingham
torn up for the purpose of being paved
within the next year.
---■—-" I
Talladega Reporter: The battle of China
la not Uncle Sam's mix.
Gadsden Journal: The weather man
may know his business, but we suggest
that he save a little water for July and
Hartselle Enquirer: With Comer out In
the field, Cunningham getting ready, and
| ex-Governor Johnston's friends tugging
at his aspirations—politics will soon come
forth In all Its glory!
Anniston Hot Blast: Secretary Taft
says that after every liar has had his
say about the Panama canal, the work
can go on. Mr. P. Bigelow knows best
whether he cares to take this up.
Trl-Cour.ty Weekly: Mrs. Flske. the ac
tress, asks: "Why do so many people go
to the theatre like children who want
pink sticks of candy?" The answer is
easy. They don’t know how much nausea
they will get for their meney.
Prattville progress: There were 2207
applicants for teachers’ licenses in Ala
bama at the January examination, ot'
which 6(56 failed. So much for the educa
tional system,’in showing that there were
666 people wanting to teach who were
not qualified.
Florence Herald: The state press gen
erally spenks In th^ highest terms of
praise of Hon. 8. D. Weakley, as a
jurist and a man, and he will receive
warm support In his desire to bo nomina
ted for the office be now holds, subject
to the democratic primary next fall.
Selma Journal: The voice of the base
ball fan is again being heard in the land
and the) baseball writer Is beginning to
loosen up from his winter hibernation and
give to the newspaper reading public the
regular old article of "dope." The na
tional game appears to be reviving all
over the country and there will doubtless
bo a big wave of enthusiasm In baseball
circles this summer.
Huntsville Mercury: Mr. William Loyd
Garrison a attention Is respectfully direct
ed to the outrages being perpetrated in
Ohio against unoffending negroes. While
their right of suffrage Is not withheld,
their right of holding property safely la
violated and their lives are endangered
because they have colored skins. William
Loyd should call another mass meeting
and read the riot act to the citizen of the
commonwealth which has furnished us so
many republican Presidents.
Washington—(Special to the New York
Times).—When the Senate came out of
secret session tonight several senators
were seen smoking. The rules are strict
against Indulging In cigars on th# floor,
and the sight was an unusual one. Among
those who were enjoying themselves wns
La Follette, who was pacing up and
down at the back of the chamber and pull
ing away vigorously on a blazing stub.
Senator Pettus stepped up to him as ho
was on the way to the cloakroom and
laid bis hand on his shoulder.
• My dear boy.” said the veteran humor
ist from Alabama. "I am the oldest sena
tor in years, as you are the youngest In
"That’s nicely said, senator,” replied La
Follette. smiling.
"Yes. well, now, let me tell you some
thing.'' replied Pettus. "You are reveal
ing the secrets of the executive session
when you finish that cigar dftbr the doors
are opened.” „
Both laughed heartily.
"One thing more," continued the old
man. "I don't let out any secrets that
way, because I lake my tobacco another
wav. See?" and, shifting a lump from
his right to his left cheek, he stalked into
the cloakroom.
From the Savannah Press.
Cromwell believes that silence is golden
and he hasn't gotten his money from the
French Canal company yet.
IN the course of an amateur perform
ance recently, the leading comedian
was supposed to pay a visit to the
nether regions by way of a trap door cut
In the stage. He got half way down to
hades and laying a bit of paper on the
stage, where he could read his lines con
veniently. he proceeded to deliver his fare
well address. After his concluding re
marks were ended the comedian picked
up the paper and descended carefully
Into the realm of Are and brimstone,
totally overlooking the fact that the
hot lakes down there might scorch his
prompt sheet. The devil on the stage
above'watted in silent suspense. A tense
stillness fell upon the audience. It was
clear that something had gone amiss, but
whether the comedian was in peril, or had
fallen from the ladder could not *be as
certained. Finally a member of the com
pany leaned over the mouth of hades and
called softly to the comedian below. After
a long wait he Issued forth once more,
delivered the remainder of his peroration,
which, It seems, he had neglected to
speak at first, and returned to the home
of Mephisto with a satisfied air. The
play then proceeded.
He spoke so gently.
And always, by choice,
That people remark^"' -.i
His gumshoe voice.
Birmingham’s water wagons are now
painted a bright blue. They could be seen
a mile away if it wasn't for the smoke.
Six thousand persons saw Sarah Bern
hardt play “Camille” at Kansas City.
Six persons In the audience knew what
she was talking about.
They lived a while
In weeded bliss
Each night a hug,
Each morn a kiss—
Until one day
There came a cloud
And sounds of strife
Prolonged and loud.
To court they rushed.
With fierce complaint,
The husband mad.
His wife quite faint.
The judge gave her
A quick decree.
Their hearts were two
Again, b’gee.
In married life.
As now It's tried,
We multiply
And then divide.
“Nobody’s Darling" corresponds for an
Alabama newspaper and creates the Im
pression that she Is looking* for some
one to love her.
The simple life is not a fad In Rias
and Bobo, two peaceful Alabama towns.
In Springfield, O.
The folks fight so
We’d rather go
To Springfield, Mo.
A Vermont man asked the postmaster
of Tvouisville to send him the names of
all unsaved persons In the city and the
postmaster mailed him a copy of the city
Just pin your faith to the man who
Who is never afraid to do and die;
To the man who wears a smile and
“There’s a good time coming, bye and
Secretary Taft advises young men to
be mixers. The term "mixer” Is applied
to a man who makes other people think
that he is Interested in them when It Is
to his interests to do so.
It must be great to be a musical comedy
comedian and tickle the prettiest chorus
ffirls under the chin at every performance
for nothing. It costs a layman $8 to do '
that. • I
A few more definitions taken »t ran
dom from our new dictionary:
PROMINENT CITIZEN.—Ordinary clt- j
Izen in print; any white man net In ,
PEACE.—Roosevelt's long suit.
WAR.—Roosevelt’s long suit.
man drawing $kt a month why gets
FAN.—Abbreviation of FANATIC; used
in baseball parlance; comes with tho
violets and fades with the golden rod*
JOKE.—Something presumably funny
which we say ourselves.
VOCALIST—Person Who slngi In a
church choir for $30 a month.
SINGER.—Person who sings for $1000 i
a performance And up.
BUNCO.—Art of doing, others ; before |
they do you; universal practice.
HUSBAND.—One to Whom things are
POLITICS.—Game In which the cards
are always stacked.
BALDNESS.—A misfortune but not a
bar to matrimony. ,
BOOK.—Something to read; see BANK j
WOMAN.—The riddle of the ages.
GIRL.—Same as WOMAN, only younger.
LADY.—Obsolete; see WOMAN.
GENT.—Gone with LADY.
"Let us be honest.’’ says the Talladega
Reporter. One! Two! Three! All tqgetharl
Commissioner Bingham refers to ''Hell's
Delight.” Must mean the magnates.
When Phyllis was poor
No one came to woo her,
But now she is rich
And dozens pursue her.
Now we are informed that cold Storage
breeds germs In chickens. How about
Little drops of water
Put In ''gllt-edgpd” stock
Make the common, people
Put their clothes In hock.
The editor of the Polkvllli Bugle an
nounces that David B. Henderson died
at Paresis, Iowa.
A newspaper man asked George M.
Cohan what he would do when the pub
lic got tired of his style of entertain
ment. He answered; "I won't have to
do anything then,” which is neat enough,
considering the money George makes.
By Robert Burns.
Ye banks, and braes, and streams arousd
The Castle o' Montgomery.
Green be your tfoods, and fair yoUr
flowers, V;
Youf waters never drumlle!
There simmer first unfauld her rob eg,/
And there she langest tarry;
For there I took the last farewell f
O' my sweet Highland Mary. « j
How sweetly bloomed the gay green bilk.
How rich the hawthorne's blossom, t
As underneath their fragrant shade \
I clasped her to my bosom!
The golden hours, on angel wings,
Flew o'er me and my dearie; ■'
For dear to me, as light and life,
Was my sweet Highland Mary. - l
WT many a vow. and locked embrace.
Our parting was fu- tender;
And. pleading oft to meet again,
We tore ourselves asunder;
But, Oh! fell death's untimely frost.
That nipt my flower gas CarlyY
Now green's the sod. and eauld's the clap.
That wraps my Highland Mary.
O pale, pale now those rosy Ups
I oft liae kissed sue fondly!
And closed for ay the sparkling glanoa
That dwelt on me sae kindly!
And mouldering now In silent dust
That heart that lo'ed so dearly—
But still within my bosom’s eors
Shall live my Highland Mary.

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