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1*3. W. BARRETT Editor Entered at the Birmingham Ala., postofflee as second class matter under act of Congress March 3, 1879. Daily and Sunday Age-Herald.... $8.00 Daily and Sunday, per month.70 Daily and Sunday, three months.. 2.00 Weekly Age-Herald, per annum.. .50 Sunday Age-Herald . 2.00 Subscription payable in advance. Z. E. Morgan and W. G. Wharton are the only authorized traveling repre sentatives of The Age-Herald in its circulation department. No communication will l»e published without its author’s name. Rejected manuscript will not be returned unless stamps are enclosed for that purpose. Remittances can be made at current rate of exchange. The Age-Herald will not be responsible for money sent through the mails. Address, THE AGE-HERALD, Birmingham, Ala. Washington bureau, 207 Hibbs build ing. European bureau, 5 Henrietta street, Covent Garden. London. Eastern business office, Rooms 48 to B0, Inclusive, Tribune building, Now York city; western business office. Tribune building, Chicago. The S. C. "Beckwith Special Agency, agents for eign advertising. TELEPHONE Bell (private egehnnge connecting ■ 11 departments), No. 4800. An full of peril and ■dventuroun spirit An to o'ervvnlk n current roaring loml On the uncertain footing of n spenr. —1 King Henry IV. A Popular Appointment President Wilson's selection of John Skelton Williams of Richmond and Baltimore for the position of assistant secretary of the treasury will not only meet with hearty approval in the south, but it will be accepted in financial circles generally as a capital appointment. Mr. Williams is in the prime of life. He has been associated with his father in the banking business ever since he grew to manhood. Before he was 30 he was recognized as a financier of exceptional capacity. He organized the Seaboard Air Line in 1899 and was the president of that railroad sys tem five years. He is now president of one of the largest banks in Rich mond and is also president of the Georgia and Florida railway. Few men in the south have such wide personal acquaintance as Mr. Williams. He numbers his friends by the thousands. As soon as he became president of the Seaboard he proj ected the construction of the line from Atlanta to Birmingham. Such an extension of the Seaboard system meant the expenditure of a large sum of money, but Mr. Williams had the prophetic vision and knew that no matter what the original cost might be the Seaboard must reach the Bir mingham district. And his policy has been well justified. The people of this city hold him in especial esteem for what he has accomplished and they will be gratified to kniw that he is to have a prominent place in the democratic administration. Like Secretary of the Treasury W. G. McAdoo, Mr. Williams had never sought office, but being a man of constructive mind and large experience in affairs, he is uncommonly well equipped for public life. In accepting a government position Mr. Williams, like other men who have had honors thrust upon them, makes a real sac’,J fice, and the administration is to be all the more congratulated, therefore, for inducing him to accept the posi tion of assistant secretary of the treasury. Adrianople and the War The surrender of the besieged fort ress would no doubt speedily lead to the end of the war. Turkey has noth ing to gain by a continuance of it. She is no. match for the allies. The allies can gain but little, for none of them want Constantinople, and the time has really come to end the strug gle. It is reported that Shukri Pasha, the commander at Adrianople, has sent a tnesage in cipher to Constan tinople saying that his food and am munition supplies are nearly ex haunted, and that the besieged town is full of disease. This, if true, indi cates an early surrender of Adrian ople, unless indeed peace negotiations are hastened, or an attempt made from the Tchatalja lines to relieve the city. The former is improbable, and the latter impossible, and the surren der of Adrianople within a week's time is pretty sure to take place. The defense of the city was begun with the coming on of the war itself. It goes back to the closing months of last year, and the gallant command er and his brave men cannot be justly blamed if they surrender when their rations and ammunition are ex hausted. Shukri Pasha may attempt to break through the lines of the allies, but if his effort should be successful Adrianople would fall, and this is all the allies desire. This would not pro long the war. Me. Wallace's Probable Platform John H. Wallace's outlined guberna torial platform calls for the appoint ment of a public utilities commission. He is not content to hand the sub ject over to the railroad commission, thus avoiding the creation of more State officers. Mr. Wallace says the state should mot be content with the control and regulation of public utilities, keeping them on a reasonable basis so far as cost to consumers is concerned. The state, he says, should also take tolls on all hydro-electric energy sold. At this point the distinguished fish and game commissioner ignores not ! only the rights of riparian owners but also the law of 1907 which hands over to any improvement company “an easement for power purposes to and in the waters and beds of the river in which said dam or system of dams and lock or system of locks are to be constructed for the full area covered by the slackwater pool or pools which will be created by the construction of such dam or system of dams to the extent necessary for developing the full waterpower of said river over the length of the same upon which navi gation is to be improved.” Mr. Wallace is all right so far as regulation and control of public utili ties are concerned, but when as gov ernor he would undertake to collect tolls from hyjlro-clectric energy he would, alas, strike a snag in the law of 1907. 0 Unfounded Charges Against South The attempt to put the blanje of in terference with the suffrage parade in Washington on "rough stuff from the south” has miscarried. No evidence to sustain the point brought forward by Miss Elsie M. Hill of Norwalk, Conn., has been brought out, and none will be. The spectators from the south looked on with wondering eyes at the parade, but at no point did they crowd upon it or interfere in any manner with its progress. The chief trouble occurred where Seventh street crosses Pennsylvania avenue, and the evidence shows that at that point were gathered the hood lums of Washington reinforced by the hoodlums of Baltimore, which is only 40 miles away. The riff-raff and rab ble of the two cities created the trou ble. The commisisoners of the city and Chief Sylvester should have foreseen all this. They should have known that the novelty of the pageant would at tract a vast array of spectators, and they should have been ready to meet it, reinforced by detachments of cav alry from Fort Meyer, but their fore sight was not equal to their hindsight, and the capital was disgraced by ob structions of a peaceful and wholly lawful parade—a parade that the com missioners had authorized. “Everything,” says Charles Edward Russell, the well known magazinist, “which was in the hands of the wom en on Monday was a success; the one thing in the hands of the men went to smash.” A still greater suffrage pa rade is planned to take place in New York on May 3, and this will demon strate the difference between a com petent, well drilled police force and an incompetent one. Lipton’s Challenge Declined The New York Yacht club is the defender of the America’s cup, which it has held against all comers through out two generations. Sir Thomas Lip ton has frequently challenged the club and has endeavored each time to win three races out of five over its course. His efforts heretofore have been in vain, and now he attempts to dictate new conditions. Heretofore the racing vessels have been not less than 65 feet nor more than 90 feet in length on the water line.^Sir Thom as now says that a yacht of the 90 foot type cannot be constructed on the other side of the sea and brought across in safety to the crew without a sacrifice of some of her racing quali ties to the strength of construction necessary for an ocean voyage. He proposes now to send across a cutter 75 feet long on the load water line. His challenge has, however, been de clined by the New York Yacht club because it seeks to confine the home club to a similar vessel, whereas in the deed of gift the defending club was left free tc ;lect a vessel up to 90 feet in leng .. Sir Thomas will soon see that he cannot name the conditions of the race. He must conform to ex isting conditions or keep out of the contest for the America’s cup alto gether. The "Daughters oC the Parade” are to he organized to run neck and neck with the D. A. R. in the years to come. Chicago tried to change the names of X1G streets, but was compelled by public clamor to reduce the number to 475. Wilson once said he hoped Bryan would he knocked into a cocked hat, but later he knocked him into a silk hat. If Mr. McCombs becomes ambassador to France his jump from a mule farm in Arkansas will be the record. Before May 50 attacks from certain New York newspapers upon the Wilson admin istration will be fully due. New England has the strange feeling when it thinks it lias no representative in the cabinet. The Indiana best seller has rivals In the illuminated seed catalog and roseate hen book. •-—•*.— The hoot heels of bosses are not wearing out the White House steps at present. Uncle Joe Cannon has reached Ids finish, and it is not exactly what he desired. i President Wilson Is handing another jolt to tradition by the kind of clothes he Is wearing. Instead of appearing at the ex ecutive offices and White House func tions in a frock suit or cutaway, he dresses in a gray sack suit. In this gai’l) ^e has received the supreme court of the United States, the diplomatic corps and all other callers at the White House. Presidents Cleveland, Harrison and Mc Kinley wore black coats during the day. Colonel Roosevelt m>metimcs wore a gray suit, but more frequently a black cut away. President Taft appeared in frock and cutaway coats and occasionally in a blue sack suit. He preferred a derby to any other kind of head gear. Presi dent Wilson likes a derby. He finds a turndown collar more comfortable, and in his tie Is stuck a beautiful pin bearing the coat of arms of the United States. Jack Cudahy, 10 Is now reconciled with hts wife, has secured one-seventh of his father's estate, or about J1,500,000. The will cut him off, and a settlement gives him hts share which is to be held by a trust company fay him, his wife and two children. Prof. George B. McClellan of Prince ton, the former mayor of New York city, is freely mentioned for the position of American ambassador tojtaly. Professor McClellan says, however that he is a can didate “for nothing.” Secretary of the Navy Daniels is a sea sonable old tar from Raleigh, N. C., 200 miles from the sea. The little precedents in Washington expect daily to tie smashed, and as a rule they should be.^ President Wilson has Joined the Univer sity club in Washington and will pay his dues as any other member does. Tills is the (list club the President has Joined In Washington. The bill desired by Governor Sulzer pro viding for free books and school supplies throughout the state of New York has been Introduced and will probably be passed. Frank A. Munsey has sold the Boston Journal to Matthew Hale, who is state chairman of the progressive party. The price of the paper has been reduced to 1 cent. The straw hats of the coming season will be about the same as those of last year. Get your old hat cleaned while i you wait. The popular fake photograph in Wash ington at present Is one representing the buyer grasping the hand of President Wil son. The new administration' is passing suc cessfully through its second week. It is one that grows on a true democrat. “HOBBLKD” Ada Cambridge, in the March number of The North American Review. Dress is not my subject, but only a natural introduction to my subject. It was the hobble skirt suggested it. . . . I am a woman’s woman; I am even— although I detest the term—a woman’s rights woman; but I wish sometimes that tyrant man would exercise his brute power in this matter. That he floes not “turn’* under the provocation of such frocks and hats as have lately been brought into his family and at least refuse to pay for them argues him but an imitation tyrant, after all, without the brutality of a worm. . . . Small beginnings that are the roots of all great endings are decidedly indicated in our case. Not only can we clear no gap at all, not even a street gutter, we cannot even jump for it until the back width is slit up with a knife or a tenderer hand puts in a new one "somewhat fuller than the last.” That is where we must begin. We shall have our equality with inan recognized' all right when we are equal, but that is not yet—while we are tangled up in chiffons and ho goes free. . . . Now how to go on—for go on we must, belated as we are. Well, there is the men’s example. If you prefer not to be beholden to them, there are our grand mothers and great-grandmothers to give us useful hints. Those admirable women, not having time and brain power to waste, held to one fashion of costume for years and years. . . . They have but to set an example—an ex ample of mere sobriety. Is that much to do? Our grandmothers did it without ef fort or thought, and the money they saved upon intoxicating liquors, so to speak, provided excellent nourishment for the body politic of their day. Queen Vic toria was a more efficient queen and no less dignified a lady for her unconcealed gray hair and furrowed face and some times dowdy garments. Not that we want dawdiness—emphatically not. Beauty, beauty all the time! But what is beauty when reduced to its elements? Surely first of all sincerity, then simplicity, then harmony, appropriateness—In short, most of the ingredients at present conspicuous by their absence from the creations of fashion and which the creators only use by accident, apparently, from time to time. DALMATIANS A FINK RACK Robert Hiehens, the novelist, who Is again writing a travel series for the Cen tum magazine, describes In the March Century the people of "Picturesque Dal matia,” the edge of the Balkan warVme. They are a handsome' people, he says, rustic looking, yet often noble, with kind yet bold faces, steady eyes, and a mag nificent physique. Their gait is large and loose. There are giants in Dalmatia in our days. And many of the women are not only pretty, but have delightful ex pressions, open, pure and gay. There seems to be nothing to fear In Dalmatia.^ I have driven through the wilds and over the flanks of the mountains both in Dal matia and Herzegovina, In the dead of the night, and had no unpleasant experi ence. The peasants have a high reputa tion for honesty and general probity as well as for courage. And beggars are scarce, if they exist at all, in Dalmatia. FIRST TSE OF THE MONOCLE From the New York Sun. London.—The monocle, usually associ ated with the sterner although perhaps not less vain sex. has been wforn for just j 100 years. The first person to screw a j glass In his eve was, according to Sir Horace Rumbold, a Dutch exquisite, Jonk ! heer Breele, whose monocle startled the ( diplomats assembled for the congress of Vienna. The fashion spread rapidly. In Dr. Kitchiner's "Economy of the Eyes,” published nine years after the congress, he deplores the fact that "a single glass set in a smart ring is often used by trinket fgneiers merely for fashion’s sake., I 'Wiese folk ha\ e not the least defect in their sight and are not aware of the ^ mischievous consequences of such irri tation." IN HOTEL LOBBIES General Trailc Satisfactory I “'Business lr. most sections of the coun try continues active. I believe, said Frank S. Brantley of Chicago. "General trade Is very satisfactory at this time and I look for decidedly brisk conditions between now and summer. If we have favorable crop reports in June, business will boom. On the whole we have had a high degree of prosperity for 12 months past, and T have an Idea that this year will be even better than 1912." St. Patrick's Flag Day "Every Irlsh-Amerlcan and all admirers of Irish people and Erin's great apostle, St. Patrick, will buy a Hag from the I.a dles of Charity next Monday, St. Pat rick's day," said a man. "The money raised on Hag day will go to help support the free clinic of St. Vincent s hospital maintained by the I.adies of Charity. "The free clinic has already done un told good and as Birmingham grows such a charity will he all the more needed. I feel confident that the ladles in charge of the work will be liberally patronized on Monday." To Aid Needy Veferans "It is sincerely hoped that the Daugh ters of the Confederacy, who are selling tickets for the Newsome moving picture theatres, the .proceeds to he devoted to relieving the condition of needy veterans, will meet with abundant success," said a citizen. "We have many appeals for charity, but none more worthy, perhaps, than the one referred to. "Everyone buying a ticket gets full value for the small expenditure. Many of the veterans are now aged and some of them are poverty stricken. The ladies shculd be able to raise a large amount." That Mississippi Story "One of the best stories for pointing a moral is that on the Mississippi negro, which Mr. Walker Percy told at a Young Women's Christian association money raising luncheon, and which was repro duced in The Age-Herald’s report at the time," said a member of the Chamber of Commerce. "Birmingham has hundreds and hun dreds of business men who have more or less civic spirit and who arc gen erous hearted, but there are a few who talk a good deal about public spirit and yet who are very close when it comes to contributing money to any cause. Tne amount of money needed for the Young Women's Christian association was over subscribed. Those of us who helped to canvass found the work most pleasant. Out of 20 men whom I approached only one declined to sign a subscription card, but 1 have been on money raising com mittees many times within the past 12 years and I recall quite a number of well-to-do men who complained that there were too many appeals, etc. "I started out the other day to help the Music Festival association raise a $10,no0 guarantee fund. The plan was to get 100 men to subscribe $100 each towards meeting any deficit that might occur. This is not giving $100 or the half of $100 or the fourth of $100. it would possibly mean that a guarantor would he called upon to help make up a small deficit, which pro rated, would hardly exceed $2 or $9 for each guarantor—$5 at the most. Yet, I heard a man say .that he was called on for so many things and called on so often that he must decline to put his name on the music festival guarantee list. "This is Mr. Percy's story and it is ■well to print It every now and then: “ 'Mose,' said Ephriam, 'I've got a re markable wife. She's always asking me for money. She beats anything I ever heard of. Sometimes asks me for a hit, sometimes for two-bits and some times for a dollar. " 'Well, what does she do with so much money?' queried Mose. " Now, fo' heaven, I ain't never gl’n her any yet!” The Wilson Administration Popular "President Wilson lias started oft ad mirably," said William T. Arnold of Rochester, N. Y. "I did not vote the democratic ticket, but the patriotic Im pulse in mo comes before party politics and no matter who happens to be Pres ident I feel like exclaiming, 'Long live the President!' "Some of my republican and progressive friends expressed fear last fall that a democratic victory would not be well for the business interests of the country. • ■am not enough of a philosopher to say just what effect this or that party has on trade. I believe that the tariff should he revised and the majority of, men of ull parties have favored downward re vision. Mr. Wilson is unquestionably a man of brains and a man of convictions. In the tariff matter I think he will agree to whatever Mr. Underwood proposes and as Mr. Underwood Is a conservative statesman, business Interests at large should Certainly have nothing to fear. "When it comes to appointments Pres ident Wilson Is making a splendid record. He Is picking only high class-men." C'lgnrelte Smoking "I have no statistics at hand, but 1 think it safe to say that cigarette smok ing Is decidedly on the Increase," said a club man. “It used to be that the volume of the cigarette trade depended upon the excessive smoker, who bought several packages every day, and the small boy. Now, the average man who uses tobacco at all smokes cigarettes occasionally. I notice this in all the cafes ^rhere smoking Is allowed. There are fewer cigarette fiends but more men who smoke Intelligently and without any ap parent harm to themselves. "I noticed the other day that an anti cigarette crusade was being organized. I predict that such a crusade will make very little Wogress. Certain It is that many men of exemplary habits enjoy a cigarette or two after every meal, and why should they not indulge to any mod erate extent?” GOOD I-'OOD ESSENTIAI,. From "The New Industrial Day," by Wil liam C. Red field. Once, when my office was located in Paris, I employed a lot of French car penters and paid them 10 francs a day ($1.90) each. Arid at the e'nd of three or four days I was well-nigh ofazy. Down the long aisle of the building 1 saw a familiar looking tool box, with a saw sticking from the end, and 1 ran to the place and found a man who looked like an American carpenter. "Are you a Yankee?” I said. "I want to employ you at once.” He raid: "Boss, I charge $4.50 a day.” "I said, “Come right along.” Two days later I discharged four Frenchmen, for my one American carpen ter did more work than the four French men—and I saved money by the precess. There are sound reasons why the Amer ican carpenter did as mufh work as four Frenchmen. A French w orkman goes to w ork having eaten almost nothing. For breakfast he has nothing more than a bit of bread, without butter, and coffee. At 11 o’clock he stops to eat a little bread and drink a little sour wine. That is all I ever saw any of them eat. At 3 o’clock he stops again to eat a little bread and drink a ! little sour wine. After he gets through at night he has what he calls a dinner. Such a man cannot work at any labor requiring steady physical exertion continuously un der pressure In competition with a man who eats three square meals a day. EYES From the New York Mail. Are your eyes green? If they are not ' you cannot claim the indorsement of the ! great classic writers. Of course, this does not mean grass green, but the gray j i«h green so often found in the most ex pressive eyes. It was Dante ,who de scribed Beatrice’s eyes as emeralds, and in English literature Frances Collins writes: And let those sea-green eyes divine Pour their love-madness Into mine. While SwipbuVne describes the finest eyes: O fervid eyelids, letting through Those eyes the greenst of things blue, The bluest of things gray. Shakespeare did indeed speak of the "green-eyed monster," but he is the great exception. The eye has always been considered the most expressive feature in the human countenance, so it is natural that every fledgling poet hastens to pen an ode to the eyes of some fair maid. Called the "windows of the heart,s> tfieir expressive ness has been emphasized rather more than the color. Some writers claim that the color of the eye is an indication of character. "Dark blue eyes are most common in persons of delicate, refined or effeminate nature: light blue, and, much more, gray eyes, in the hardy and ac tive; greenish eyes have generally the same meaning as gray; hazels are the usual Indication of a mascultne, vigor ous and profound mind/* Many modern poets pay full tribute to blue eyes, Shelley comparing them to "deep blue, boundless heaven." In Spain they have a proverb: "Blue eyes say, ‘Love me or I die;’ black eyes say, 'Love me or I kill thee.’ " Gray eyer? have their admirers, too. Shakespeare speaks of "Your eyes as gray as glass and right amiable.” Black eyes are interpreted both good and evil, and the Mahommedan heaven is filled | with "Virgins with chaste mien and j large black eyes." But that the black-1 eyed girl* is deceitful will he held a libel by every dark-eyed maiden. The suggestion possibly comes from one of! the old folk rhymes: Gray-eyed greedy, Brown-eyed needy. Black-eyed never likin’, Till it shame all its kin. Proverbs are never more than half true. The setting of the eye has much to do with its beauty and tjie appreciation of beholders. Long, .sweeping lashes are an added beauty, and the eyeiV^ow has always been studied in connection with character. Some hold that it is a good thing to i have meeting eyebrows, as such a person will never have trouble. The Greeks admired those eyebrows which almost met, and Tennyson ascribes to Oenoi e , "the charms of meeting brows.” In Asia the women aid nature by arti ficlal means, joining the eyebrows'M-by black pigment when they do not grow together. It is generally agreed that a woman's eyebrows should he delicately and nicely penciled, hut fancy plays strange freaks as to color. In Central Africa women stain them \yith indigo, and Georgian damsels blacken theirs. Japanese ladies, when married, remove their eyebrows al together, so that their husbands may have no cause for jealousy. That the eyebrow should be beautifully arched is agreed by poets and painters alike, even if it be not for the cause as signed by Herder, who says that it is the rainbow of peace, because, when "straightened by a frown, it portends a storm." , A CITY UPON THE WATER From the New York Mall. The rivers flowing tjirough Canton, China, have upon their waters practically a separate city, composed of about 330.000 persons, living or^ sampans and house boats. These floating homes are moored together In such a way that streets and squares are forrtied, through which the tradesmen ply their wares. Kitchen boats move, along the liquid thorough fares, barbers and doctors paddle about ringing bells. There are flsh boats, cloth ing boats, vegetable boats, aod even float ing biers to convey the dead to earthly graves. There are floating hotels, float ing restaurants, floating dance halls and even floating leper boats, from which emerge pathetic figures who hold out trays for alms. The Inhabitants of the city never marry wlthN the shore folks and seldom even land.' In some cases the men get occupa tions on shore, but this Is rare, and they chiefly make a livelihood by dredging for coal dropped, by passing steamers or by searching for articles lost overboard by tourists. Each sampan w!t*in Its scant 20 feet shelters under Its bamboo roof from six to a dozen people. It Is a rude one room affair, and in most cases extremely dirty. Over the stern Is usually hung a basket, where squawking poultry and squealing pigs bewail the fates that east’ them into such cramped quarters. MRS. CLBVBUND’I POPULARITY From the Century Magazine. Hilary A. Herbert, who was Secretary of (lie Navy in the last democratic adminis tration, contributes to the March Cen tury an article which though entitled “drover Cleveland and His Cabinet at Work,” deals as well with cabinet social life. The relations between Mrs. Cleve land and the cabinet ladles were as de lightful as those between the President and Igs staff, says Mr. Herbert, and none of us admired pieveland more than wp did the flrstlaftftof the land. Sometimes, hojjtffekr. 1 Mrs. Cleveland thought that me^^^6.of the cabinet were piu rosi'hing prerogatives. One bright arternoe^^K*®- sitting with the dissident golngsjjj^f some business. The hour for his «mu3JTafternoon drive had arrived. Mrs. Cleveland came in dressed for the ride, gauntlet* In hand. "Well,” slip said, addressing herseff to the Pres ident, "it’s lime for you to go.” "I can't go tnis evening,” was the reply. “Seere tary Herbert has some business he wants to talk over with me.” ,”Yes,” she said, tapping him at tha same time playfully on the knee with one of her gauntlets, “that's always the way. You prefer your j secretaries to me?' and then turning to me She said, "I hate every one of you 1 iibinet officers. You are always taking him when you know that he needa his drive.” But tha bualn«M want on, ft Va,- ". ADRIFT WITH THE TIM A SURPRISED PARENT. "Pa, this newspaper say3 a Mexican junta lias been found In Washington. What Is a Junta, pa?” ‘ Son, is it possible that you have been In school four years and still show such ignorance of natural history? J.out-: it up in the dictionary, sir!” "GLAMIS HAfH MURDER’D SLEEP." "How did you enjoy the play, Goth rock?” "Oh, I thought Macbeth was good, but who was Glamis?” HOPELESS CASE. "I don't know what’s to become of Mask." "What’s the matter with the girl?” "She says she no longer gets a thrill at a moving picture show.” TOO EARLY FOR THAT. No doubt poor Adam seems to all A most unlucky man; From Eden forced, be could not call A motor moving van. STILL DOUBTFUL. 'Teople used to wear stocas on their teet. Now they wear stocks around their necks.’ "Quite so, and I haven't made up my mind yet ns to whether the modern way is any improvement over the old.” DOESN'T SEEM RIGHT. "I see where a poet claims to make a Uving out of his verse.” •“Yes, and he is being severely criticised tor it, too.” THREE LAZY "G'S." Imbro(g)lio. lnta(g)lio. Sera(gjlio. A SLIGHT MISTAKE. Mrs. Lane is a zealous and leyal wife end intends to avoid exaggeration, but has a strong tendency in that direction. "It’s perfectly wonderful," she said to a patient friend, "to see the way Mr. Lane counts bills at the bank, I think they are so lucky to have him! He'll take a great pile of five and ten and twenty dollar hills, and make his fingers fly Just like lightning, and never make a mistake!” “Never?" asked the friend, who knew Mrs. line's weakness and could not for bear the question. • •VVell—no—at least,” stammered Mrs. Lane, "why, perhaps he might got o or to cents out of the way, hut not any more, ever.' —Harper's Magazine. A CASE IN POINT. "Some people are so Inconsistent." "Yes?" "I know a man who had his rooms finished In quiet tones and then bought a phonograph." FAVORITE FICTION. j "Old Chap, You Haven't Changed a Hit in Thirty Years!” , i "Dear Maria: I Eagerly Seize the First Opportunity to Write to You." ! "Unversally Pronounced by press and Public to Re the Greatest Play of Mod ern Times.” "Mr. Chairman, I Rise with the Great est Reluctance, but——-” "I don't Know Whether You Owe Us Anything or Not, Mr. Smith, but I’ll See." "George, T Wolddn't Say a Word to Hurt Your Feelings for the World." "I Admire Your Nerve!”—Chicago Tribune. VERY SWIFT. "Rill posters work with astonishing rap idity.” "Indeed, they do. The other day I saw one seize a small boy by mistake -and paste him on a billboard in tlife twinkling of an eye.” EITHER WAY, IT'S TRUPl. My honest friend. If you're in doubt, , Don't ever go The toadstool route, For history Is strangely mute On those who take The toadstool route. USING CUSS WORDS. A small boy in Fort Scott was out play ing with his wagon one day and Just at the critical moment one wheel came off. The youngster walked around the wagon several times and surveyed it with the air of one accustomed to disappointments. As he dragged the wagon to his home he met a boy friend who joined him, and together they trudged on. The owner of the wagonjsat on the front step with a forlorn look, then quickly brightening up he exclaimed: "Let's cuss.” "All right," returned the other, “Cuss, cuss, cusb. — Fort Scott Tribune. PAUL COOK. .......... ELECTRICITY IN BUSINESS From the Electric News Service. IT is surprising what a large number of electrical devices are employed in the modern business office. Of course, nearly every office now has electric lights, electric fans, electric telephones and electric call-bells and buzzers. But there are a ntfiiber of important office appliances recently de veloped which operate by electric power. One of the must important office ma chines of today is the adding machine. Once upon a time an adding macTrine would do, nothing but add; now they are veritable mechanical mathemati cians and will subtract, divide and mul tlptsr-as Welle as add. The operator of one of these machines in an account ing department begins by listing a cus tomer's old balance, registering the amount by touching the electric operat ing bar instead of pulling the lever, as would be necessary on a band ma chine. The carriage automatically shifts (under electrical impulse) to the next column and subtracts the checks as they are listed. This wonder-worker will only subtract in tho "checks" col umn and only add in the "deposit" col umn, so that the operator can hardly make a mistake. An overdraft Is plainly indicated as such by tt)e ma chine, which designates it."0. D.," to distinguish it from the balance totals. By way of a test one of these electric machines, with nine keys locked down and touchbar fastened down with a cord, was run for 24 hours a day for 1^ days. Its speed was 160 strokes a minute adding and listing 9,999,999,99 at each strojte. The motor bearings were not even heated and the machine waa ready to repeat the feat. Electric fnultlgraph machines that print circulars and writes letters are also used. The two machines are used, one to print letterheads and the other large, circulars. When printed tho let terheads are transferred to another au tomatic machino which writes the let ter and signs it in ink of a different color—all in otto operation. After the letterheads are printed and filled with writing they are inserted In envelopes and Hent to a sealing ma chine. This device works at the rate of 11,000 envelopes an^hour. An electrically-operated typewriter that will turn out as many typewritten letters as can be written on six ordi nary machines in the same period of time, illustrates a convenient way in which to give a circular the appear ance anti influence of a personal, in dividual letter. The average letter multiplied on a mimeograph, or some like machine, is so patently a "form'’ that It seldom receives any considera tion at the hands of a husy man. The letter writing machine Is a com bination of operator and cabinet, a per forator, an automatic device for feed ing letterheads and a typewriter. The letter is first written on the perfora tor, which is operated like a type writer. As the keys are struck a hole is punched on a sheet of paper. The roll of paper is placed in posi tion in tho ‘'operator," and it is un reeled, like the rolls on a pTayer piano; the yeks of the typewriter are mado to strike in correspondence with the holes, the result being a perfect repro duction of the letter. An electric mo tor of one-tenth of a horse power fur nishes the power. There is also a motor-driven machine which seals and stamps letters at tho rate of'160 a minute. It automatically eounls the stamps as they are used, thereby preventing thefts. An electria addressogrnph is also used in soma large offices for majling papers nnd circulars. STATUS OF THE COAL TRADE. The Black Diamond, the official or gan of the coal trade, in Its issue of Saturday, says: The national coal market for tho week is in about this position: The re tail dealers, computing their stocks oh one side and the likelihood of an early spring on the other, have come to the conclusion they will not need any more coal to carry them through. This stops the spot buying of domestic coal. The operators, with their mines down to almost a midsummer level of produc tion, are not speculating on any cold weather yet to come, but are concen trating their attention upon contracts. Since the domestic business is sub tracted from their total tonnage, no one is willing to suffer a contraction of his output. For this reason, the vigor with which contracts are being sought has a tendency to soften prices. It la evident from the foregoing that all concerned In the coal trade have taken the most hopeless view ot, the en tire coal situation. It is taken for granted that there will be practically no buying of coal by the retail dealers. In fact, the dealers have become so con vinced of an early spring and warm weather, some of them* are already be moaning their necessity to carry over heavy slocks of unsold coal into the summer. Some operators have taken this as such a matter of course that they are making the prophesy that this will retard the sale of coal for next season's delivery. It benefits the cur_ rent market to have all believe that way, even though It Is not strictly true, or, for that matter, true at all. Several Indications point to the fact that rather than holding over any large stocks of unsold coal, the dealers will be heavy buyers before the spring Is at an end. In Chicago, for example, dealers who lind declared they were slocked up for this year have"been buy ing coal freely within the last week. Indications from the country are that other purchases will be necessary be fore long. Knowing the ‘ propensity of the dealers to take fright easily at a small pile of unsold eoal, it may be said without fear of contradiction, that the retailers have erred on the side of pes simism. Also, It Is known that In the north west and »U through the M|t that / stocks of coal are inordinately smalt. The amount carried over this year will be the smallest, In all probability, in history, on tlie average. Any protract ed period of cold weather this spring would completely clean up stocks al most everywhere. Tills has a big Influence upon tha contract season. It Is true that tho operators are taking a gloomy view of the situation. They say that they have April In which to produce coal, whereas, last year all mines were closed down In that month. They figure upon tho possible production during that month . as being so much more of a burden upon the market, softening prices. On' the contrary, there will have to be In storage, by the end of March, enough coal to last a month anyway, to malts allowance for the mine suspension which comes about that time. To take care' of next year's strike demand and to make up something of the storage piles which have been al lowed to run dangerously low should give a good business through the sum mer. To be sure, It cannot be expected that the summer market Is going tit take as much coal as Is taken In win ter. If the operators wtll figure upon that instead of each one figuring upon running full time wbH» fits neighbor closes down, there need be no serious decline In the prices accepted on con* tract from the basis which recently has prevailed. The operators have also to take' Into consideration thdt a bigger foreign de* mand will have to be" supplied this year. While tnat will come mainly from the east, it will relieve the west* ern market. Also, industrial expansion, which Is progressing steadily, will de mand more coal than Is now being used. The, prospects, pn these two accounts, * are for a summer business above tha average. GOODNIGHT By Rosa Clisby John. My boy, goodnight, Goodnight. My light Is soft and low; my pillow* bed, Thy tender, loving hands await. My lips and brow unklssed, unsaid My prayer, for late I sit—goodnight. I waft goodnight To thee across the way that lies , Between us, dear. Ah, good the night I That brings sweet slumber to thine eytr ” No day or night Is good to me Nk That does not hold a prayer for that, Goodnight! goodnight. Birmingham, March, wa.