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The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, April 20, 1913, EDITORIAL SECTION, Image 28

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E. W. BARRETT Editor
Entered at the Birmingham Ala.,
poetofflce as second class matter under
act of Congress March 3, 1879.
Dally and Sunday Age-Herald.... »8.00
Dally and Sunday, per month.70
Dally and Sunday, three months.. 2.00
Weekly Age-Herald, per annum.. .50
Sunday Age-Herald .••••• z'ou
Subscription payable in advance.
W. G. Wharton and A J. Eaton, Jr.,
are the only authorized traveling rep
resentatives of The Age-Herald in Its
circulation department.
No communication will be published
without lte author's name. Rejected
manuscript will not be returned unless
stamps are enclosed for that purpose.
Remittances can be made at current
rate of exchange. The Age-Herald will
not be responsible for money sent
through the mails. Address. _
Birmingham. Ala.
Washington bureau, 207 Hlbbs build
European bureau, 5 Henrietta street.
Covent Garden. London.
Eaetern business office. Rooms «8 to
#0, inclusive. Tribune building. New
fork city; western business offlce.
Tribune building. Chicago. The B. L.
Beckwith Special Agency, agents for
eign advertising.
Bell (private exchange connecting
nil department*)# Na.
How *mart
A lash that speech doth give my con
^ A Gala Week
This will be a week of unusual in
terest and much festivity in Birming
ham. The Shriners will begin to make
merry tomorrow, and will hold a car
nival every afternoon and night. The
Sociological congress meets Tuesday
and the potlatch, which has been ex
tensively advertised, will have bril
liant parades and unique entertain
ments Thursday and Friday. The
National Good Roads federation will
hold a great convention here on the
potlatch days. Birmingham is a hos
pitable city and all.the visitors will be
cordially welcomed.
Birmingham’s symphony festival
will take place on May 5 and 6 and
it will attract many music lovers from
the towns and cities of Alabama. But
the week which will be distinctly
marked by gala decorations and the
festive spirit is at hand. The business
district is already gay with color and
before tomorrow noon every house
should display a flag or a festoon. The
spring season is the time above all
others for decorations and Birming
ham should now surpass herself in
carnival features.
The Business Outlook
Reports from the winter wheat belt
indicate a bumper crop and in the cot
ton belt, planting conditions are most
excellent. As prosperity is based pri
marily upon agriculture large crops
this summer will mean great activity
in commerce and industry from one
end of the country to the other. Last
June prosperity started up after a
period of extreme dullness and that
prosperity continued the rest of the
year. It was based on the big crops.
The financial world has now dis
counted tariff revision and in New
.York and other financial and commer
cial centers crop talk is all the vogue.
With splendid crops nothing can keep
prosperity back.
The Birmingham district has en
joyed an exceptional degree of pros
perity for 12 months past. The pay
rolls have been larger than ever and
If we have great grain crops and a
great cotton crop this year the rail
roads will be overtaxed with profitable
traffic; and Birmingham, as well as
the rest of the country, will share in
:the general buoyancy. It looks as if
the Birmingham district had another
uncommonly busy year ahead of it.
Clark and Bryan Bury the Hatchet
All the misunderstandings at Balti
|moro that concerned Speaker Champ
Clark and Secretary Bryan have been
put with the bygones and will not re
turn to estrange these two great lead
ers of the democratic party. They met
for the first time at a luncheon ar
ranged for reconciliation purposes,
end it worked out admirably.
The statement prepared by Mr. Bry
en shows that he always has regarded
and does still regard Mr. Clark as “a
good, clean, progressive democrat,”
with no reactionary poison in his
blood, and Mr. Clark in his statement
accepted Mr. Bryan’s explanation of
his Baltimore speech, and the hatchet
was formally and fully buried on the
This is no small achievement at the
outset of the Wilson administration.
As Mr. Clark says, “all personal and
•elfish considerations must give way
to the duty that all democrats owe to
our party and to our country.” It was
a settlement based on patriotism and
the good of all democrats, and as such
it deserves a high place among the
acts of tho administration.
No Recognition of Mexico
It is very plain that the Unied
States has no intention of becoming a
supporter in any manner of a govern
ment by butchery. Madero and Suarez
Were regularly elected according to the
terms of the Mexican constitution and
Huerta and Felix Diaz conspired
against them and they were finally
•hot in the most cowardly manner.
Henry Lane Wilson, the present rep
mentativ* of Hie United States in
Mexico City, is probably a supporter
of the Huerta-Diaz regime, but he will
not be permitted to define the policy
of this country in Mexico. That will
be done in Washington and it will be
done right.
On account of mining intrests Great
Britain and Russia fiave recognized
the Huerta government. Their action
is based on greed and selfishness, and
humanity and decency were not re
garded. The longer the Huerta gov
ernment goes unrecognized by this
country the greater will be the satis
faction of those who do not consider
butchery a proper basis for a govern
ment in Pan-America.
Progress of the Underwood Bill
The Underwood tariff bill has run
the test of the democratic caucus
safely, and on Friday the income tax
was considered in all its bearings. It
stands as first reported, save in re
spect to insurance policies which are
not to be considered as income, and
the taxation of insurance companies is
limited to 1 per cent on their net in
come. The exemption of $4000 stands
and the rate of taxation is 1 per cent
on small incomes, going up to 4 per
cent on incomes of $100,000.
This action pretty nearly winds up
the caucus consideration of the bill,
and it will doubtless be formally laid
before the House early this week—
probably on Wednesday. Many efforts
were made to change the income ex
emption, but all were voted down, and
the bill as drawn goes to the House
untouched in any material feature.
This victory of Oscar Underwood
relieves him of a great responsibility.
The bill is now an administration and
party bill, and it will be readily passed
in the House. Some say it will be sent
to the Senate by May 1, and there the
interests will make their last stand.
It is their natural battle ground, but
there are 61 democrats now in the
Senate and 43 republicans and two
progressives. The 61 democrats should
to a man vote for the Underwood bill,
and those who do not will have to ac
count to the democratic party for any
delinquent vote.
Peace Through the Powers
The Balkan allies have decided to
accept the peace proposals of the
powers, and all fighting will probably
be ended at once. Even King Nicholas
of Montenegro has decided to join Bul
garia, Servia and Greece, and to aban
don the seige of Scutari. The latter
proposition became inevitable when
Servia withdrew her troops.
The truth is, the resources of the
allies are just about exhausted, and
Turkey never had any resources that
enabled her to cope with the aggres
sive allies. The exhaustion of resources
permits Turkey to retain a slender
foothold in Europe, but the retention
of Constantinople and its suburbs does
not make her an European power.
Practically speaking Turkey will here
after be confined to Asia with many
followers in Africa.
The result of the war was a shock
to the powers. They anticipated at the
outset a victory on Turkey’s part, but
they quickly conformed to the situa
tion when they saw that Turkey’s
military prestige was gone. Except in
Albania the allies will get pretty near
ly all the territory they sought. The
question of indemnity will be settled
by a commission to meet in Paris, and
then this important war will be fully
ended. Turkey lingered in Europe
about 600 years too long.
Charges of offering to sell his vote pre
ferred against Representative Clifford L.
Snow of Manchester were upheld by tho
house in New Hampshire, and he was or
dered expelled. The vote was 177 to 110.
Party lines were eliminated In the ballot
ing. Snow was elected as a republican,
but afterward joined the progressives, and
during the last few weeks had voted with
the democrats. The expulsion Is the first
in the history of the New Hampshire leg
islature. Snow was found guilty of having
offered to sell his vote and influence to
Gordon Woodbury, a democratic candidate
for United States senator; to Franklin
Worcester, republican candidate for gov
erner, and to Elmer S. Tilton, republican
candidate for governor’s council. The
committee that Investigated the charges
was unanimous In deciding that the elec
tion of a United States senator was with
out evidence of any actual sale of votes.
'By the adoption of an amendment to
the city charter, Mrs. May Ammerman
was elected police magistrate, city clerk,
city auditor and city treasurer of Colo
rado City. Mrs. Ammerman originally
was a candidate for the office of city
clerk but the amendment gives her the rest.
"I don’t like these Jobs they are giving
me, and I’ll bet some of the best of them
won’t like them, either,” said Mrs. Am
1 merman when Informed of her election.
"Moral and social conditions will be im
proved In Colorado City if I can do It
through the office of police magistrate.
Excuses without foundation are given by
’joy riders,’ drinkers and men derelict
In their morals. These absurd excuses
will not be regarded In my court room,
and the men will have to offer something
substantial In the way of vindication be
fore I dismiss them.”
The man who Is to fly from*the Canaries
to any spot In America he can sec first has
inflated his balloon. He Is still tied fast
to the Cunaries.
, . - -t---- -
The suffragettes in London are blamed
ifor almost everything except the disap
pearance of the Memphis cotton broker.
Plans for the further organization of
the progressive party In every county In
the United States were formulated at a
meeting of the executive committee of the
party at the Hotel Manhattan, New York,
last week. It was the first meeting of the
committee since January and reports of
conditions In almost every state were re
ceived. These reports were highly opti
mistic. The discussion has had
to do almost entirely with organization.
George W. Perkins, chairman of the
committee, presided, and the other mem
bers present were Judgo Ben Lindsey,
Colorado; George C. Priestly, Oklahoma;
Medill McCormick, Illinois; Walter Brown,
Ohio; Charles H. Thompson, Vermont,
and William Fllnn, Pennsylvania. The
only two members absent were Miss Jane
Addams, who Is In Europe, and Meyer
Llsner of California.
Princess Louise, the erratic daughter of
the late King Leopold of Belgium, will
have to pay *770 for a dozen parasols she
bought two years ago to match as many
dresses—that Is, If her creditors can find
something to levy on. Judgment was ren
dered against her In the civil courts for
that amount. One of the parasols cost
*140. She has been bankrupt several times,
although she Inherited a share of the
large estate left by her father. The
parasol escapade is the latest and mildest
In a series that has made her the subject
of gossip In the courts of Europe since
she left her husband, Prince Philip of
Saxe-Coburg-Gotha, to elope with a Hun
garian lieutenant named Mattachlch.
The engagement of Miss Nell Grant of
San Francisco and Santa Barbara, a
granddaughter of Gen. U. S. Grant, to
Lieut. Com. William Piggott Cronan of
the United States navy, was announced
by Miss Grant’s mother. Lieutenant Com
mander Cronan commands the destroyer
Jouatt, now In Hampton Roads. Miss
Grant is the daughter of Jesse R. Grant,
second son of former President Grant.
Holyrood Palace, the famous royal pal
ace in Edinburgh, has been closed because
of damage done by suffragettes. Foreign
visitors will be admitted to the palace In
special clrcumBtances but under certain
The claims against the Titanic number
810, and they aggregate 813,967,461. The
White Star line has applied to the federal
court for an order limiting their liabilities
on account of the Titanic to 890,000.
Dr. Osier travels Incog, because he doe^
not want to explain to reporters why lie
Is 64 years old and still unchloroformed.
The chief of the weather bureau says
April 16 was the coldest day In April this
country has known In 20 years.
Some think wedding presents should be
put on the free list, for the cost of Invi
tations la very high.
The colonel and the progressive leaders
are still conferring together, with an eye
to 1916.
The Underwood tariff planks seem to
stand all strain. They are made of hard
wood. ,
A dog expresses anger In his face and
with his mouth, but he laughs with his
The only states that pay legislators 81600
a year are New Tork and Pennsylvania.
The great suffrage strike In Belgium Is
trying to live up to Its prospectus.
The Boston Globe asks, “Where does
a noise go?" This Is a poser.
Missouri also has a bluesky law and
is waiting to be shown.
It Is to be a hot summer and a long
tariff season. Brace up.
This is the centennial year of trousers—
never forget that.
From the St. Paul Dispatch.
Henry Watterson says the average
American of moderate means lives in
constant fear of being called “a tight
I wad.” A whole sermon could be preached
on that.
It is a fact that colors our whole na
tional life and character. It accounts,
perhaps more than anything else, for the
“high cost of living”; it accounts for
much penury and w’oe. and for no little
crime. The average American, no mat
ter what company he finds himself in,
feels it necessary “to hold his end lip.”
We And struggling clerks trying to
si. end as much money as railroad law
yers. It is no uncommon thing to see a
hundred-dollar-a-month mail attempting
to make a showing as a member of a
fashionable golf club. Everywhere men
of lesser means feel ft incumbent on
them to compete with men of greater
means in the matter of spending when
It so happens that the tw'O extremes are
in the same company.
It is most noticeable, perhaps, in cases
where men seek favor with women. A
young man feels it necessary to spend
a week's salary to take the girl of his
heart to the theatre just because he
knows that other girls receive such at
tention from men, and because he knows
that other men can afford to show such
attention to his lady.
But it is a false, not an honest pride.
To live beyond one’s means is not only
a deception, but a *folly and a crime.
Sensible men do not think more of the
man w'ho splurges beyond his ability to
do so, but less. No right-minded wom
an would willingly allow a man to hire
a cab for her if she knew he could not
afford it, nor would she thank him for
tieating her with unjustifiable extrava
gance and folly.
What we need in America is less pre
tence and more honesty in these things,
which we mistakenly think of as small
matters. No one wants to be a tight
wad, but what does it avail if one escape
this name and in doing so play the Idiot?
From Youth’s Companion.
Evidently ’Liza Jane was a very use
lul person. She and the old woman came
it to a London shop and the old woman
began examining some pieces of cheap
calico. She pulled at one piece first this
way, then that, wetting it and rubbing
it with her finders, to try if the colors
were fast.
But site seemed not entirely satisfied.
At lust she cut off a piece with a pair
of scissors, and handed it to ’Lizu Jane.
“Here, ’Liza Jane,” she said, “you
chew that, and sec if it runs.”
And 'Liza Jane "raised it to her mouth
anu solemnly w'ent to work.
HumIdon* Condition*
"General trade Is more active now than
it was early In the month," said W. V.
Raines of Philadelphia.
"Now that good reports are beginning
to come from the agricultural sections
the outlook for a revival of prosperity
throughout the country is very bright in
deed. By the middle of May we will prob
ably find prosperity In full swing again.
If we are blessed with bumper crops
such as w'e had last summer we will
hare a solid boom that will last well into
Mis* Cunningham ii»i* Afternoon
Music lovers who attend Memolt's con
cert this afternoon at the Jefferson the
atre will have a great treat in Miss
Elizabeth Cunningham's vocal numbers.
This lady wras knbwn as one of Birming
ham’s best church singers a few years
ago before she had fully matured; now
she is a great artist. She is a member
of the Boston Grand Opera company, and
is also in much demand as a concert
"Memoli's Concert band is worthy" of
cordial support and the beautiful pro
gramme that he will present at the Jef
ferson theatre Sunday afterjioon will be
well worth the price of admission,’’ said
a club man who never misses a high class
concert, "but Miss Elizabeth Cunning
ham (we used to know her as Miss Bes
sie) Is an added attraction that should
draw an overflow house. This lady is one
of the really big stars in the Boston
grand opera. Nature has endowed her
with a great voice and her vocalization
is perfect. She is one of the finest so
pranos that I have ever heard, and 1
have heard nearly all of them.”
The Late J. P. Morgan
“No matter what else may be said of
the late John Pierpont Morgan, he was
a wonderful philanthropist—wonderfully
successful In keeping his many bene
factions, some of them very large, from
the public view,” said a professional man.
“Every day or two a new benefaction is
brought to light. Mr. Morgan had given
generously, but had made it a point to
keep his left hand from knowing what
his right hand did.
“No man of wealth has ever done as
much for art as Mr. Morgan, and had his
benefactions been confined to buying art
treasures to be used for the general good
he would have merited the gratitude
thousands and thousands of people. He
built and endowed a hospital In New
York at a cost of over $1,000,000, and his
other benefactions must have totalled
millions. While his benefactions in the
religious field were chiefly money contri
butions to the Episcopal church, of which
he was a member, he had given to other
churches—Catholic and Protestant. Had
he been close with his money he would
have left an estate vastly larger than
he did.
“Mr. Morgan was not only the greatest
financier that the world has ever known,
hut taken in many respects he was one
of the greatest men this country has pro
llryan an a Religious Worker
“William Jennings Bryan has been a
member of the Presbyterian church since
his youth, and ever since he became a
national celebrity he has been active in a
quiet way in religious work," said a
layman. “Now that he is in the cabinet
he is in greet demand as an orator for
religious occasions.
“The religious press is speaking eulogls
tically of him. As one of them expressed
it, Mr. Bryan is a force for moral and
religious life quite beyond any other man
among his fellow citizens. The Boston i
Congregationalist says of Mr. Bryan:
‘His has been an intuitive and positive
faith. His interest in religion lias been
intellectual only as he has found argu
ments to buttress the faith that was In
“ ‘For him there are no intellectual dif
ficulties—the soul of religion in its sim
plest forms was In him and is unshaken
to this day. Doubt seems never to have
dwelt In him, as Is the case with many
men. His participation in church work
and life does not suffer vacation moods.
He gives a tenth of his income to the
work of the kingdom. He has probably
given more money, quietly and without
special urging, to church building enter
prises in the city of Lincoln than any
other citizen. He has done this in a way
that has kept the fact from public knowl
edge.’ "
Tlic Home Garden
“Nothing is so exhilirating as garden
work at this season of the year," said
an amateur gardener. "I do not have to
get to my office before 9 o’clock and I
quit work at 5 p. rq., I use the spade and
hoe every morning and do a little garden
work in the late afternoon.
“The' morning is when 1 enjoy horticul
ture most. I rise soon after daylight,
have an early breakfast and get to work
in my garden with full zest. I culti
vate nearly half an acre in vetgetables.
I keep up my interest in garden work
until about the middle of June, ^he
weather is then so hot and the ground
is so baked that I tire of manual toil
and turn the work over to a hired man.
But just now nothing so delights me as
the home garden."
Grand Opera Next 1 ear
"if we have an auditorium next spring,
and the prospects are good, we should
have grand opera," said a member of
the Chamber of Commerce, "but I hope
that Birmingham will not be like Atlanta
—have grand opera at the expense of
all other forms of high class music.
"Atlanta used to bo considered quite a
musical city. Nearly rll the virtuosos
visited the Georgia metropolis and the
local orchestra In that city gave Sunday
concerts that were highly creditable. But
since the advent of grand opera in Atlanta
all other music lias been pushed oft the
"Grand opera is educative in a certain
way. It is unquestionably a high form of
musical art, but as It lias the show fea
ture hundreds who are known as patrons
of the opera care really little for music.”
From the Kansas City Times.
Defoe offered “Robinson Crusoe" to
publisher after publisher without success.
Ic was, however, at last brought out by
a publisher named Taylor, to whom it
proved a veritable gold mine. n« |g ga|j
to have made a profit of some hundred
thousand pounds by the sale of this re
markable hook.
W. M. Thackeray offered his brilliant
novel, "Vanity Fair," to some publishers
after it had run through the pages of a
magazine; but it was refused, as they
thought It was not an Interesting novel,
or One that would meet with a ready sale!
Jane Austen, who was undoubtedly
one of the greatest novelists that ever
lived, met with great difficulty at the
beginning of her literary career in get
ting her books printed, she sent her
"Northanger Abbey ' to three or four
Arms, hut it was refused by all of them.
W ith hopeful heart he walked life's way
And never sighed when skies were gray.
For In his heart there dwelt a dream
Of bloom and field and rippling stream,
And o'er the city's noise he beard
The sweet notes of a singing bird.
A slave who tolled and yet was free;
Than fancy nought can fairer be,
And love of Nature's sylvan haunts.
The crimson crest the poppy flaunts,
The breeze that blows o’er perfumed
The soft tattoo of summer rains,
In him commixed, turned greedy and
To something lofty and sublime.
"Are you aware of the fact that the
United States Bureau of Fisheries
hatched 202,000,000 lobsters last year?"
“No, I was not aware of that fact, but
I hale known for some time that all the
lobsters don’t come from the United
States Bureau of Fisheries.”
"I see where another man has disap
peared and can't be found."
"What's his name?” ,
"Sir, I'm a college graduate.” j
"You are, eh? Well, all I have to say
Is that the college you graduated from
must have had an absent-minded fac
Here good news is—
Say, can you match it?
Clark and Bryan have
Burled the hatchet.
"So this is the old school house I at
tended when a boy. IJow my heart
yearns for the happy days gone by!
Tears come to my eyes when I gaze on
these fatpiliar scenes and the quaint
structure that has fallen into ruins."

"I hate to interrupt your reminiscences,
old fellow, but the school house we at
tended In our boyhood is a mile or two
farther down the road. You are now
about to weep over somebody’s dilapi
dated barn.”
Cheer up, cheer up, oh, worried man,
Glad news I have to tell;
For Congress now will tie a can
To the II. C. of D.
—Cincinnati Enquirer.
"Cheer up, cheer up,” we can’t, old man.
Our life's filled with regrets;
Though Congress tie the aforesaid "can,”
It will not pay our debts.
"What’s become of the old-fashioned
man who used to buy a quart of whisky
to tide idm over Sunday?"
“Most of his type are under the
ground now'.”
Two English women suspected of hav
ing set fire to I,ady White’s house have
for first names Phillis and Mttttbent.
Sweet names, forsooth, and sadly out of
place when attached to militant suffrag
ettes, capable of incendiarism.
Words are like leaves; and where they
most abound,
Much fruit of sense beneath is., rarely
—Alexander Pope.
Talk’s like a brook and where doth swift
est flow,
We soon find out how little some men
"Your friend Dobbie seems tat be an
original fellow.”
“He certainly Is. Why, if Dobbie should
suddenly' fall heir to a large sum of
money I don’t believe he would buy an
automobile right away.'*
“I am a child wife amd I got a stinger
for a husband." writes a young woman
to a newspaper. Her1 cruel and Jealous
spouse won't even let her go down to the
grocery store. 'Tis sad to contemplate
matrimonial tnfellcaty, and yet, the fact
that this same "chfld wife" refers to her
liege lord as a "sitinger" seems to indi
cate a certain aimount of acidity in her
temper which majc or may not account
for some of her troubles. Not even a
child wife should refer to her husband
In public print as a "stljgcr.” For one
thing, a great many people surmise, but
do not know dicfltiitely Just what Is meant
by a "stinger-." Others will be of the
opinion that the term Is opprobrious, no
matter what Its exact meaning may he,
and is therefore in bad taste. If she can ]
prove that her husband is realty a
"stinger" atnd all that a stinger seems to
imply, thene is no reason why she should
not look forward to an early divor'o*
with alimony.
'Tis a "certain cure"
And the sick man takes it,
But he wouldn’t, could lie see
How the chemist makes it.
He kissed her when the sun was~shining.
He kissed her when the moon was
The maid thereat did cease repining
Ami kissed him back witli all her might.
I hate to see those greenish hats;
They are enough to scare one;
But I will tell you something—that's:
I'd rather see than wear one.
—Chicago Record-Herald.
I hate to see the little bows
Such hats oft have hehind them:
If brains repose 'neath lids like those,
I'd like to see you find them.
At last she disposed of her manuscript
for the small sum of £10 to a bookseller,
who, If we mistake not, had an estab
lishment in Bath. It turned out a splert
did speculation for him.
Gamuel Warren's very interesting
book, “The Diary of a Late Physician,”
first saw the light of day through the
medium of Blackwood's Magazine, the
publishers to whom he had submitted It
having refused to undertake its publica
tion in book form.
Charlotte Bronte1* first novel was re
fused by a great many firms.
Mrs. Harriet Beecher Stowe submitted
her “Uncle Tom's Cabin” to a firm of
publishers in Washington after it had
appeared in serial form In an anti-slav
ery magazine, but on the recommenda
tion of their reader, it was rejected.
They a(fterwards, however, undertook
the publication, and its success is uni
versally known. In England alone the
sale has reached something like four
hundred thousanud copies, while in Amer
ica it may be set down at a still larger
Sir Walter Scott, soon after he had
finished “Waverly," offered the copyright
of that novel to Sir H. ’Philips, the fa
mous bookseller, for the magnificent sum
of $150. The latter declined it.
The Rev. John ICeble offered his
“Christian Year” to a country publisher
for $100, but it was refused. As to the
sale of this book, we learn that, drrring
the forty years Immediately succeeding
its publication, Mr. Keble’s share of the
profits amounted to about $75,000.
Hans Christian Anderson’s “Fairy
Tales” were refused by all the publish
ers In Copenhagen. He brought them
out at his own expense, with what suc
cess is sufficiently known.
Blair cpuld hardly get $300 for the first
volume of his “Sermons.” Y'et it was
such a success that $1300 w'as eagerly
paid for the second volume, and for the
succeeding volumes $3000 eacii.
From the New York Sun.
She was running across lots to catch
tho 1:62 train for New York. It was
precisely 1:3214, and the train already
was panting into the station. At her
heels was a youngster making as good
time as he could, and he was crying. By
the time she reached the station steps
she was a good hundred yards ahead
of tho little boy, but he kept at it, cry
ing louder and louder. The conductor
was holding the train for her.
“Madam,” said the conductor ns she
climbed up the car steps, “who is that
little boy?”
“My youngest," she said, perfectly
“What's he crying for?"
“I didn’t have time to kiss him good
“Well, you get .right off this train and
kiss him. We can wait better than he
Tlie conductor stood with ids hand on
the signal cord while tho operation was
performed, and then the train went off,
leaving the youngster happy and smiling.
From the Chicago Record-Herald.
"Are you Mr. Leftwltch?"
"That Is my name."
"Your uncle died a few days ago, I be
“The doctors declared him dead—yes.”
“I have just read that he left his en
tire fortune to public Institutions.”
“Well, what about It? Are you a re
porter? If you are, I don't wish to be
Interviewed.” .
"No, my dear fellow, I am not a re
porter; I am a lawyer. I thought you
might have some will breaking to be
done. I am an expert will-breaker.”
“I don’t want any of my uncle’s money.
Since he preferred to cut me off without
a dollar I am perfectly willing to work
for my living.”
"Permit me to haiid you my card. In
case they ever wish to try you for lun
acy please remember me. I have kept a
number of crazy people out of asylums."
From the New York Telegram.
When the laborers of the Federal Sugar
Rellnery in Yonkers went An strike the
superintendent notified the heads of de
partments, paid off, locked the place and
started oft on a fishing trip. That must
be the original "I should worry ' man.
From the Louisville Courier-Journal.
English suffragettes spread Jam upon
window sills, hammer the glass out and
burn the houses to get votes. Wiser
From the New York Sun.
□RANSPORT a New England paint
er who happens also to be col
lege professor to the Grand
Canyon of the Colorado, and you face
a large probability that the resulting
pictures will smack of science, of ped
antry, or geography, or anything else
than emotional beauty. But in the
case of Arthur W. Dow the unexpected
lms happened, as visitors at the Mon
trose gallery have been finding out
for some days past. %
There Is science here and in some in
stances the following of nature has led
to violations of the accepted conven
tions of pictorial beauty, but on the
whole the studies In oils that Mr. Dow
has made of this wonderful region of
the far southwest reflect something
vital and appreciative, something
worth bringing out of the Arizona
desert and setting before stay at homes
in a New York gallery.
What Mr. Dow lias sought to do is to
study the extrarodinary color that lives
in the canyon's walls and upon the
summits of its buttes. Then too, its
line attracted him mightily, for, as he
has written in his foreword in the cat
alogue of the exhibition: “The color
lies in rhythmic ranges, pile on pile, a
geologic Babylon. This high, thin air is
iridescent from cosmic dust; shapes and
shadows seen in these vast distances
and fearful deeps are now blue, now
vibrating with spectral hues. At sunset
the 'temples’ are flaming red orange,
glorified like the Egyptian god in his
And, again, he remarks that "the
canyon’s color and line cannot be well
expressed without study of the struc
ture, for this Is neither 'chaos* nor
‘liell,’ but orderly world building.” This
sounds rather scientific, and is un
doubtedly true, but Mr. Dow’s logical
mind has not been unresponsive to the
esthetic side and he has kept, ns al
ready stated, a reasonably sure feel
ing for what was pictorial and what
merely diagrammatic.
Color dreams of the great American
southwest, theatrical effects of violent
contrasts, have been long familiar In
eastern art stores, but they have not
been taken seriously. You must let
the artist be the final authority as to
questions of nature, and there may be
no successful disputing as to what he
saw, but It Is competent for any expe
rienced student of art to say whether
such material was or was not picto
rial, whether or not It has been treated
within the conventions of art.
Mr. Dow has in the main kept within
such limits. But when lie shows ■ the
amazing light of sunset gleaming upon
far away "/temples," while the rest of
the landscape is in sombre dusk, ho
transgresses the bounds; wonderful
and stimulating as such effects are
when seen In the actual place they
make for disturbance and Irritation
when the painter tries to transfer them
to canvass. After all values, the rela
tion between color or light Intensities,
must be maintained In a picture.
It is when Mr. Dow discovers for you
the prospect from some rocky eminence
at tlfe edge of the canyon In a light
more or less equably diffused that you
begin to yield to the beauty of thu
work. You perceive structure, design,
pattern In the arrangement of the vast
fissures and clefts that make space Isl
ands of the towering rock forms. The
fathomless channels that separate these
buttes constitute tho spine and ribs of
an organic system.
The several planes of the composition
are differentiated with skill and the
mriously architectural aspects of the
rocks quite justify Mr. Dow In calling
:hem temples or cosmic cities or castles.
American Buffragettes spread Jam upon
biscuits and Inspire the confidence of
men In their ability and trustworthiness
as citizens. They are not the suffragettes
who get Inft) the headlines, but they will
be those who get the vote if the franchise
is extended.
From the Ladies' Home Journal.
The farmer's mule had just balked In
the road when the country doctor came
by. The farmer asked the Mjhysllcan If
ho could give him something to start
the mule. The doctor said he could, and,
reaching doXn Into his medicine case,
gave the animal some powders. The
mule switched hts tall, tossed his head
and started on a mad gallop down the
road. The farmer looked first at the
flying animal and then at the doctor.
"How much did that medicine cost,
foe?" he asked.
"Oh, about 13 cents," said the physi
"Well, give me a quarter's worth,
quick!" And he swallowed it. *Tvs got
to catch that mule.”
Miniver Klutch In April Smart Set.
Cad—A man who doesn’t believe every
thing a woman tells him.
Chivalry—Refusing to accommodate a
lady who Is dying to be kissed.
Cliastlty—The Inseparable attribute of
Clergyman—A ticket speculator out
side the gates of heaven.
Judge—A man who agrees to listen to
balderdash five hours a day In return
for immunity from work.
Marriage—The last refuge of scoun
Sophistry—The device used by people
who get the best of us in an argument.
From the New York Telegram.
So as not to he too severe In the sud
den curtailment of the amusements of
the common people, It la suggested that
In closing caharets the police might
good naturcdly trukey trot In and firm
ly but gently tango the Inmates out Into
the street so as to give them the full
benefit of the music and exercise.
From the Montgomery Advertiser.
Alabama friends of Mr. Underwood re
gret to learn of his Illness. He has
worked laboriously and long In the service
of his country; In fact, he has worked
harder than his friends thought best for
him. Though he possesses a robust con
stitution, and is in the prime o£ 111% Us

/ ■**
is feeling the strain and wear of hia
duties. There is no truer maxim concern
ing government, or society, than that the
delaila of all great movements must bo
executed by one or two men. It Is human
nature to follow a lender and accept his
findings. This means hard work for the
From the Chattanooga Times.
There are many persons who hope that
Mr. Underwood won’t be able to recognize
his bill by the time Congress gets through
with It.
The music, yearning like a god in pain.
It flows through old hush'd Egypt and
It* sands,
Like some grave mighty thought,
threading a dream. —Leigh Hunt.
Accomplishment Is parcel of the will
That action hangs upon.
—Hudson Maxim.
But thou canst hear the ocean in one
And se© the whole world’s winter tn
ono leaf. —Markham.
Love that is first and last of all things
The light that moving has man’s life
for shade.
—Algernon Charles Swinburne.
Methought I heard a vole© cry: Sleep no
Macbeth doth murder ale«p; the Inno
cent sleep:
Sleep, that knits up the raveled sleeve
of car©,
The death of each day’s life, sore labor’*
bath V
Balm, of hurt minds, groat nature’s sec
ond course,
Chief nourisher In life’s feast.
As, flake by flake, the beetling ava
Build up their Imminent crags of
noiseless snow,
T11Y some chance thrill the loosened
ruin launches
And the blind havoc leaps unwarned
So grew and gathered through the si
lent years
Tlie madness of a people, wrong by
There seemed no strength In the dumb
toilers’ tears.
No strength in suffering—but the past
was strong:
The brute despair of Trampled centuries
Leapt up with one hoarso yell and
snapt its bands.
Groped for its right with horny, cal
lous hands.
And starod around for God with blood
shot eyes.
•—James Bussell Lowell,

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