Newspaper Page Text
K. W. BARRETT Editor Entered at the Birmingham Ala., , postofflcu as second class matter under act of Congress March 3, 1879. Daily and Sunday Age-Heralu .... 88.00 Dally and Sunday, per month.70 Daily and Sunday, throe months.. 2.00 f Weekly Age-Herald, per annum.. .60 1 Sunday Age-Herald .•"••• 2.00 1 Subscription payable in advance. j W. II. Overbey and A. ,T. Eaton, Jr,, ] arc the only authorized traveling repre-1 eentatlvcs of The Age-Herald in its cir culation department. f»o communication will be published without Its author’s name. Rejected manuscript will not be returned unless stamps are enclosed for that purpose. Remittances can be made at current late of exchange. The Age-Herald will [not be responsible for money sent through the malls. Address, THE AO E-HERALD, Birmingham, Ala. Washington bureau. 207 Hibbs bulld European bureau, B Henrietta street. Covent Garden. London. Eastern business office. Rooms 48 to 60, inclusive, Tribune building. York city; western business off M. Tribune building. Chicago. The IS. L. Beckwtth Special Agency, agents for :»lgn advertising. telephone Bell (private exchange connecting toll department*). No- <Jrnr __ - Who hna breast so pure, ))nt some uncleanly npprebenslons Keep leets and law-day., and In sea nloitR «lt W \ih meditations lawfulT —Othello. Paragraph By Paragraph General debate on the tariff bill is landed. The Smart Alecks have fired ,off all their shots and the politicians iin the standpat and progressive Ss-anks have made their speeches for ^Buncombe. The bill will hereafter be attacked in detail by amendments as Section after section of it is read, and the speaking will be confined to the five minute rule. ‘ Mr. Underwood’s leadership has suf fered no check. The party has not had >«ince the war a leader in whom it had equal confidence. His integrity and ca pacity stand unquestioned. His knowl edge of the complex tariff question is simply unapproached. Under such a i leader success becomes assured. Presi dent Wilson will lend a helping hand. The sugar trust and the wool in terests and all the other interests are, however, depending upon breaks from the party in the Senate. No ruptures of this nature will occur. The Balti more platform is explicit, and any democratic senator who bolts will cease to be a democrat. The eyes of the entire country will be focussed on the Senate, and the work that Oscar Underwood has built up after years of study will rot be undone in the Senate. The bill will go through the Senate essentially unamended. The party is committed to it, and the fierce (light of publicity will beat upon any senator who attempts to betray the ((democratic party. Affairs in Peking The five-power loan to China; jil26,000,000,*lias been signed, and the provisional president, Yuan Shai Kai, krill get the money, and will be able [to hold his army intact, simply be cause be will be able to pay it. The United States is not a party to j^his loan, which belongs in the dol lar diplomacy class. Neither President jjWilson nor Secretary Bryan believe Sn dollar diplomacy, and they declined |fo make this country a part of the j)oan scheme. In China there is much dissatisfac tion over the loan. All know that it Renders China more or less dependent upon the five powers, and the party ;Jn the south may attempt to cancel ;the loan. The five powers are Great ■Britain, France, Germany, Russia and Ljapan, and there is no end to the de jfenands they may make upon the new [republic. Fortunately the United ["States has been taken out of the mud dle, and is in positiion to recognize ;China on a just and friendly basis. Recognition by this country is de layed because the lower house of the Chinese parliament has not been able to elect a speaker. Just as soon as the legislature is organized and a perma nent president elected the recognition of China by the United States will ■peedily follow. Instructions to that effect have been sent to American Charge Williams at Peking. This im portant act should take place this week. Birmingham’s Contribution Alabama Methodism is to be trusted lr- an emergency. It is a virile power that never fails to respond to a just appeal. The 'Birmingham college asked the Birmingham district to contribute $150,000 towards an endow ment fund and new buildings, and the Bum was fully subscribed for on Sun day. The other districts of the con ference aremise to raise $100,000. and then President Simpson will feel that he has the Methodists of Ala bama at his*back. The college at Owenton will become one of the great institutions of the state-and the Methodists of today have long felt the need of a college in which every impulse would come from the great church that Wesley founded. The Baptists have an institution 'at East Lake and the Methodists will soon have one of equal strength at Owenton. Birmingham is glad to hold both of Every possible effort should be made to strengthen both, for both will soon attract students from every part of Alabama. The two strong churches in question cover the state like tlie dew and this city is fortunate in securing their two great institu tions of learning. Uncle Sam's Canal The Elihu Roots' and Smoots do not know all the law there is to know. The law they know is law that favors the interests, while the broad law that covers the entire case is ignored. The subject of the exemption of coastwise vessels from the payment of Panama canal tolls was freely dis cussed at the recent meeting in Wash ington of the American Society of International Law. Richard Olney, for mer Secretary of State, could not at tend the meeting but he sent a paper on the subject which was read. “It is clear,” said Mr. Olney, “that a na tion or state does not convey away its property or sovereignty except by terms that are clear and susceptible of no other meaning; and that where the meaning can be taken to favor the United States, it is the clear right of the United States to urge that it be held that the words ‘all nations’ do not mean to include the United States. However, it is not necessary to rely upon this presumption, as the United States is owner and can fix such terms as it pleases. If the question is sub mitted to arbitration it should not be submitted to The Hague, but to a spe cial tribunal. The Hague would be partial as, admittedly, all European powers interested in the outcome.” Many of the leading speakers ac cepted Mr, Olney’s view of the sub ject. England would pay nearly one half of the total revenue of the canal, and she very naturally opposes the view that Uncle Sam owns the canal and can name the terms of its use. It has cost this country, or rather will cost this country, about $400,000,000 while it will not cost England a penny. This country certainly has some su perior rights in the canal, and the ef fete east and the transcontinental railroads cannot confuse the situation. Crop Prospects and Business Certain ‘‘interests’’ opposed to tariff revision have been alarmists, as might have been expected, but for every pessimist there are 100 optimists. The many welcome tariff reform and when the Underwood bill becomes law even the opponents of revision will make the best of the situation and talk and act cheerfully. What the whole country is hoping for is an abundant harvest. If last year’s bumper crops are repeated business w'ill become more active than it was even in 1912. Based on the splendid crops there was a high degree of prosperity from one end v>f the country to the other and so it will be this year, with like crop conditions. Reports from the winter wheat belt are even more satisfactory now than they were at this time a year ago. In the south cotton planting is from three to four weeks ahead of the 1912 plating. If we have a good summer season Alabama will probably make a new high record crop. This state is coming ahead steadily in corn pro duction and the farmers will prob ably add more to the wealth of the state this year than in any previous year. For a long time the southern farm ers struggled to keep ahead; now they are getting rich. Thrift in the agri cultural districts is seen on every side. The poverty stricken farmer will in time become a rare exception to the rule. Alabama is certain to become one of the richest states of the union. The only dark spot now on Ala bama's record is illiteracy among those who live in districts with in adequate school facilities. This blot will be wiped out only when a con stitutional amendment is adopted al lowing each school district to tax it self for school purposes. In the meantime, in view of the fine crop prospects optimism should be as much in evidence in Alabama as it is in the country at large. The students of Harvard university have asked Cayo Puga, the designer of the Columbus caravel at the Chicago exposi tion, tb sell his designs, as they propose to construct a similar caravel to pass through the Panama canal at its Inau guration as a compliment to Spain. It is proposed that the ships shall go to San Francisco afterward. Senor Puga replied that he would present tho designs will ingly -without any cost. Models of the Nina, the Plnta and the Santa Marla, Co lumbus' three famous little vessels, were exhibited at the Columbian exposition In Chicago In 1893. New York had a look at them when they dropped anchor In the Hudson on April 36 of that year. There were receptions for tho officers and they attracted a great deal of attention. They left for tho world's fair on June 7, 1893, and got there by way of Montreal and the great lakes on July 8 of that year. That Oscar W. TJijderwood of Alabama, the democratic leader, will be elected j President of the United States, if the pending tariff bill Is successful operating as a law was the testimony of two mem bers who delivered speeches in the House last wreek. One of the members who pre dicted the elevation of Mr. Underwood to the presidency under the circumstances indicated was Representative Palmer of Pennsylvania, a democrat, and the other Representative Langtry of Kentucky, a republican. “Jf Mr. Underwood continues to grow in popularity in this country and the tariff bi|l is a success, nothing can stop Mr. Underwood from going to thea White House,” said Mr. Langtry. “No combination could defeat him, not even Bryan, Wilson, Clark, Roosevelt or La Follette, either singly or working in com bination.” More than 12,000,000 copies of “cook books," prepared by the department of agriculture, have been issued since this line of government activity began. By far the largest number published was of a bulletin on the “Economic Use of Meat in the Homes,” which rai^ up to 2,236,000 copies. Congress itself printed 600,000 copies in addition to those distributed by the department. Of the bread making pamphlet nearly 500,000 have been dis tributed, and of the cheese leaflet almost 300,000 have been sent out. Of the mutton bulletin, just out, 60,000 copies have been ordered printed for initia’ distribution. Col. a^m Mrs. George S. Schermerhorn celebrated in **their home, No. 67 West Fifty-second street, New York, the fifty fourth anniversary of their nj^rriage. During all their wedded life Col. and Mrs. Schermeihorn have never been separated from each other a single evening. Neither ; l>as ever written a letter to Abe other. | The celebration consisted principally of | the gathering of their children at the house for dinner. Maj. Edward G. Scher merhorn, Governor Sulzer's military sec retary, a son of the aged couple, came down from Albany especially for the cele bration. The Schermerhorns were mar ried in 1869 by the Rev. Dr. Muhlenberg, founder of St. Luke’s hospital. A youth 13 years old and a 19-year-old girl were the principal characters in a love tragedy, enacted at Antwerp, Bel gium, last week. Arm in arm they climbed to the clock gallery in the tower of the Notre Dame cathedral, and from a height of 180 feet leaped into space, falling at the feet of passersby. Every bone in the bodies of the boy and ids companion was broken. As they hurtled through the air several men and women who witnessed the sight fainted. According to the po lice, the leap from the church tower was in accordance with a premeditated double suicide pact. T. Coleman du Pont of Wilmington, Del., has bought for $8,000,000 the site of the Equitable building, destroyed by fire 16 months ago, and will erect thereon a 36 story office building. A mortgage of $2<>,- 1 500,000, the ^largest within recollection of Manhatatn real estate dealers, was re corded on the property. When completed the skyscraper will represent an invest ment of approximately $30,000,000. The new building will occupy the entire block bounded by Broadway, Pine, Nassau and Cedar streets. Mrs. Annie G. Rogers, wife of a busi ness mail in Deadville, Col., has been des ignated by Secretary I.aqe of the interior department for appointment as receiver of the land office at I-eadville, at a sal ary of $£000 a year. Mrs. Rogers is a widely known suffragist. “I am partic ularly glad to name Mrs. Rogers,” said Secretary Lane, “because it is an estab lished fact in tho United States that money can be handled more safely by women than by men.” In six years more than 2000 judgments have been recorded under the pure food law against food adulterators. Their pun ishment has never been severe enough. Senator Hoko Smith denounces profes j sional baseball as a bold trust, but Pres ident Wilson hurries away to attend the games just the same. __. Considerable diplomacy can arise from fresh grape juice and cold water, and Secretary Bryan stands firmly by his original formula. The crushing of little Montenegro by j Austria-Hungary will shock an honest and [decent world. There is now no baseball trust—peace reigns now, for Tyrus Cobb is back in the fold. No barber is warranted to use a perfect ly fresh towel on every expressive coun tenance. It is to be hoped that Secretary Daniels will make no change in the name of plum duff. No industry has gone down faster in this country than that of standing pat. Real tariff revision looks well on paper and it will work well in practice. Dope and. hope Is the diet of the base ball fan at present. Ko tariff bill suits everybody. IN HOTEL LOBBIES Prospermia Texas "I have never seen Texas more pros perous than It Is now," said Buford D. Chenoweth, who represents nard ware Interests. "I was there last week and found business good everywhere. "Dallas Is full of progress and the people there are great optimists. Hous ton is also going right ahead. Fort Worth Is a very busy city and San Antonio has inado strides since the last census was taken. That popular tourist city Is now far over the 100,000 mark. I think it is safo to say that every town In Texas, large and small, Is enjoying unusual prosperity." Tke Symphony Concert* "It has been a 3'ear since I had the opportunity of hearing a symphony concert," said a musician, "and after the Cincinnati orchestra visits this eltv next week It will probably be another year before symphony music Is heard here. It used to be that one or two symphony orchestras were available for southern, towns in the fall or winter, but not so now. The Cincinnati or chestra is the only one that will come to this part of the country for concert purposes this spring and Its southern tour will cover less than a week—two days in Birmingham, one day in Chat tanooga and two days In Knoxville. It is one of the finest orchestras in the United .States and If Birmingham is th.* musical city It is believed to be, i>ll three of the performances here will attract full houses." Mr. Dugan** VInit ft. A. Dugan of Chicago, president of the Calumet Foundry Supply company, wrho is now in Birmingham, is being greeted by his old friends here. When lie was assistant general manager of the Southern railway he spent much of his time in this city and no visiting railroad official was more popular. Mr. Dugan Is at the head of a prosperous manufactur ing company and has a number of cus tomers in tills district. “Birmingham Is growing and Improv ing rapidly,” said Mr. Dugan. ‘‘I was here for a day in December last. I noticed the handsome improvements then. Strides seem to have been made within the past three months. ‘‘Business in my line is very good and I am expecting to see a great deal of prosperity during the late spring and summer.” Optimism In the Northwest “The pig iron market is quiet and it will probably remain quiet for 30 days longer,” said William M. Byrd of the Hammond-Byrd company. “Consumers, as a rule, are only buying for immediate needs. In a month from now, however, I think we will have a brisk market once more. “I returned Saturday from a three weeks’ trip, visiting the middle west and the northwest. I went as far as Winni peg. Going north, I stopped at Indian apolis, Chicago and Duluth and return ing visited Omaha, Minneapolis, St. Paul and Missouri points. All through the northwest I found a great deal of op timism. Every business man I met was optimfstic. The great crops last year brought prosperity and the prospects for big crops again this year have had the ifect of^nitting everybody in a good humor, so far as I could see. “As to the tariff, the people with whom I came in contact had discounted in a large measure the effect tariff revision would have on the business situation. Nobody w’as thinking that business would be depressed by the passage of the Un derwood hill. On the other hand, every body was expecting increasing activity in business just as soon as it was settled. Many merchants will delay, however, heavy buying until the new' tariff bill becomes law. Tills accounts for a tem porary lull in certain directions. But on the whole I have never known more op timism in business circles in the states I visited than T found the other day. If crop reports continue to be good we will soon have healthy activity throughout j the United States.” C brlMtmnw Sa^lngK Club The American Trust and Havings hank's Christmas club department, which was opened yesterday, proved to he decidedly popular. From 9 o'clock until the closing hour those who want id to accumulate a snug holiday fund by depositing small amounts weekly opened accounts at the Christmas club counter. Many of the depositors were boys and girls but there were also many grown folks, especially women. Several depositors opened an account with 5 cents but more started with 10 cents. According to the “progressive payment" plan, starting with 5 cents and paying 6 cents each week more than the week before, thus, 5 cents, 10 cents, 15 cents, etc., the totnl on December 15 will ho $28.05. Those who prefer to make systematic payments, that is to say, the sanm amount each week. 25 cents weekly would total $8.25 by the middle of December. Any white person ran join the Christ mas savings club by making the first deposit and agreeing to make the oth ers. According to the club rules no withdrawals are to bo made until De cember 15. When balances amount t*» $5 or over 4 per c< nt interest will be allowed. Another feature of the club Is that one depositor can have any' number of accounts. ^ The American Trust and Savings is the only bank in Alabama that has the Christmas savings club and with the exception of the Whitney Central m Now Orleans it is the only one in the south. “The Christmas savijvgs club has started off well," saitf Assistant Cash ier E. B. Crawford yesterday after noon. “The number of depositors on the first day was fully up to my ex pectation and I believe that by the end of the week the payments wrill reach quite a large volume. Ho muelf for newspaper advertising.” What a Difference it Makes “We hear it frequently and unfortun ately too truly said that tlie art of read ing aloud is becoming a lost art, and that such is the case may l>o learned any day by attending the courts when lawyers are reading the law' from the books, or by listening to tlie chattmanf at a directors’ meeting read the annual report of his company's transactions and | conditions, but on Sunday last," said a man who attended St. Paul’s church. “I was pleased to learn that the art is not yet a lost art and it never will be so long as the Rev. Father Dougherty exists. “I never will forget the expressive and impressive manner in which that clergy man read the epistle and gospel. T had heard them read scores of times pre viously, but never with such an effect. Without gesture or any attempt at dra matic intonation hi* words fell slowly gnd quietly mm snowflake?, byt yet with such a weight as to Blnk them deep, deep fn the head and heart. ‘Be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only,’ began the epistle, and so quietly, yet so powerfully was the contrast mad© be tween tho words 'doers’ and 'hearers’ that a man who failed to understand must have been a block or a stone. ! Really for the first time in my life did | I fully realize the beauty of (hat epistle. "Then in the reading of the gospel It was almost like hearing Christ him self speak, 'Amen, amen, l say to you; if you ask the Father anything in my name. He will give it you.’ How many times have I heard tjieso same words, in one ear and out the other, as the phrase is, but not so when I lj>eard tHfem said deliberately and impressively. "I have known the Herd's prayer from infancy; liavo said it thousands of times and have heard it said almost as often, and yet I never said It or heard It said as it ought to be said but once and that was when some actor recited it on the stage in ‘Quo Vadis.’ Tho way that actor said the words, 'Our Father,’ put a significance in the words taken sep arately and collectively which was a revelation. "Certain books should he read aloud in order to obtain tho real essence, tho fragrance, as it were, of the flower. Who can read the second book of Milton's ‘Paradise Host' and hope to derive any pleasure from it unless his ears are stunned with the thunder of the words of Moloch, whose terrific denunciation of the Almighty shake Pandemonium it self? All poetry should be read aloud to be thoroughly enjoyed, and If that pleas ure fS once really felt few others will be found to equal it and none to sur pass." * DEATH OF DICKENS’ DORRIT From the Philadelphia Ledger. Mary Ann Cooper, tlie original Little Dorrit in Dickens’ famous story, has passed away at the age of 100. The nov elist and she were playmates together in their childhood at Somerstown. When "Little Dorrit.” was Issued serially in 1855 to 1857 the readers eagerly awaited the appearance of each installment, and the description of William Dorrlt’s prison through the indignation It evoked had an effect that was far-reaching in bringing about prison reform. But it must have been beyond the wildest dreams of Dick ens’ little playmate that the boy who skated, rolled a hoop or entered with zest into a game of blind man’s buff would one day confer upon her a literary immor tality comparable with that, which has been the portion of Dante’s Beatrice or Petrarch’s Laura or Burns’ Jean. The poet speaks proudly of his verse that "Immor talises whom it sings,” and tills woman, otherwise unknown to fame, has inherited imperishable renown in the person of her literary counterpart. How easy it would have been for Mary Ann Cooper to remain forever among “the forgotten millions.” What was she among so many in the same street, vil lage, parish or kingdom? Yet by proxy she is known around the World, wherever an English book is read and the tongue of Milton and Shakespeare is spoken. She takes her place forever among a gallery of types who are more real than living peo ple. Her fame shall not fail, nor her glory fade as long as David Copperfleld and Little Nell. Pickwick and Sairy Gamp and Nicholas Nickleby shall live. A re nown not of her seeking shall keep the memory green of the little girl who was the playmate of Charles Dickens. BIRMINGHAM A GREAT CITY From the Montgomery Advertiser. Mr. Phares Coleman, for a number of years a prominent member of the bar of Montgomery, but now' of Birmingham, is in Montgomery on legal business with several Jefferson county lawyers. Mr. Coleman is more and more Impressed with the rapid growth of Birmingham. "There is an impression in a number of Alabama cities and towns that Birming ham gets Its strength from the men it draws from these towns and cities of Alabama,’’ said Mr. Coleman. ‘‘This idea is erroneous. For Instance, Birmingham probably draws more peoplo and more capital from Atlanta than it draws from any other southern city. It is constant ly attracting first-class business men and new capital from Atlanta. Moreover, it draws people from cities to (ho north, to the south, and ta the west as well as from the east. A -man must live in Bir mingham and learn to know conditions before he begins to realize what a city of capital and opportunities It is. There are six big office buildings in Birming ham. I venture to say that every one of them has a waiting list of prospective tenants; business men who want offices and who are waiting their turn. When I went to Birmingham there were 110 on the waiting list for offices in the First National Bank building.” CHIPPENDALE From Suburban Life. Besides Ids skill and taste as a cabinet maker, and bis fortunate judgment ill adopting varied and sundry styles to the needs and wishes of ids British patrons, Chippendale was a good business man. and thoroughly understood the art of advertising as then practiced, the art, at least, of malting himself liked, and at tracting a large and fashionable clientele— arid a habitual clientele, at that—to Ills shop in St. Martin's Lane. The belles and beaux, as well as the great lords and haughty, swelling dowagers, were wont 'to gather there of a morning, and were sure of getting what they sought, no mat ter whether it was furniture or gossip. Chippendale always made his patrons thoroughly welcome and comfortable, and his shop became to all intents, a kind of club where all the court chit-chat and scandal of the metropolis were retailed amid tlie engaging settings of chairs "in the Gothlck taste," "Chinese Sophas," Louise Qulnze secretaries and tho like. CXOUDUVO THE ISSUE From the New York Herald. If Mr. Underwood emerges from the House dehates with prestige unimpaired his stock as a natlj/ial quantity will rise. He will still be 011 the safe side of GO Irr 19H0—Washington Star. Why try to becloud the Issue by drag ging in 1920? What has i920 got to do with it. anyway? If Mr. Underwood is elected to the presidency in WIG—when lie will, almost inevitably, be bis party's nominee-lie will be out of the race In WHO. He will r.ot then be eligible for re-election, for the democartlc party lias gone solemnly on record in its platform tlcclaraf'on - ••We favor a single presidential term.” Tills declaration of policy makes Pres ident Wilson ineligible for nomination in WIG. No second cup of coffee for any democrat 1 So, if not Mr. Underwood in WIG-who. SIRE! From The New York Telegram. Biography of Representative Under wood in the congressional directory I takes five lines. His fame U securo without tooting any horn*. ADRIFT WITH THE TIMES SAD CASE OF TRAVERS GREEN. When Travers Green was feeling gay He lightly sought some cabaret And when “Fleurette” began to dance He’d give a coijnnoisseur's glance, As if to all the world to say, "I know what’s what in a cabaret.” Anon he 6ipped the sparkling wine, Where countless lights were wont to shine; Hi* dress was faultless to behold, His manners easy, yet not bold, And had you but observed him there, You would have thought him free from care. Alas, alack for Travers Green! No more in glided haunts Is seen; His dad w ho used Ids bills to pay For motors, clubs and cabaret, • And cqatly clothes and chorus gills And many, many merry W'hirls, Has cut poor Travers off without The wherewithal to roam about: And since tills youth has never toiled, Nor felt his hands by labor soiled, What lies before I cannot say, But he dines no more in a cabaret. CAUTIOUS. “Waiter, do you guarantee these eggs?” “No, sir. I’m very optimistic about those eggs, sir, but I don’t guarantee ’em.” THAT’S NOT BUSINESS. ’Tis true that advertising pays— I’ve tried it out, you see; But don’t believe the man who says He’ll give you something free. WORRYING SENATORS. Paul Cook in The Age-Herald litters this truth: “It must he painful and ar duous for a senator qf the United States to keep his ear to the ground, but he’ll have to do it in the future If he wants to hold his Job.” Methinks I hear several sedate senators excitedly inquire, “What’s that?”—Pine Belt News. A LETHAL DOSE. Behold the pampered poodle pup, Disgusting sight to see; If he’d lap what I’d give him up, He’d shortly cease to be. TOUGH ON THE BARDS. ’Tis very hard to he a bard, As everybody knowrs, And never praise the nightingale And never sing the rose. —Birmingnam Age-IIerald. 'Tis harder still to pen a rhyme With nary word of June, With no thought of the summer time And ne’er a shining, moon. —Youngstown Telegram. 1 It is a cinch to sing a lay Of nightingales and June, 4 But It Is hard to make it pay Without a ragtime tune. —Milwaukee Semin*-1 It Is no cinch to build each day A col. (and that’s no sham; Without Maud Muller raking hay, Or Mary's little lamb, —Houston Po.v It Is no cinolifto paragraph 'Bout politics and graft, From every line must come a laugh, That’s why we thank Bill Taft. —Buffalo Time* Some of the stuff the singers write Should oft be classed as screams, Particularly when bards live In towns with tail end teams. —St. Louis Times MASTER OF TITS FATE That man, we’ve found, Doth feel first class, Who carries round A season pass. TESTS. It’s easy enough to be pleasant, When a fellow is single and gay, But the man worth while Is the one who can smile When his wife throw’s money away. —Birmingham Age-Herald. It's easy enough to he pleasant, If with your best girl you happen to h'*; But the man worth while is the man wlm pan smile, When with another fellow she happens to flee. —C. M. Turner. DEPONENT SAYETH NOT. “Mr. Bill Martin stayed in our commun-*s. ity Saturday night on the account of had luck,” wrltas the Dry Valley correspond ent of the Shelby County Review. Won der what happened to Bill? THAT ROCKY ROAD. “Reading anything these days, Dubkiu?” “Yes, I finished a high-brow novel just yesterday, and now, confound the luck! 1 have a new list of words to look up in the dictionary.” SHOULD DO BIG BUSINESS. Wc note the presence of the “Bald Hea l Barber Shop” in Birmingham. Probably a place where hair tonic is not recom mended. PAUL COOK. DIAGNOSIS OF CRIME From the Philadelphia North American. DOCTOR DE NEUVILLE, a French physician, who has specialized on the medico-logal aspects of hts profession, has been telling some true stories of detective work by physicians that equals the mythical achievements of Sherlock Holmes. There are several sides of the law that hear on medicine and sur gery, and there are various specialists who devote themselves to one or all of these important relations. The specialist who receives In the United States a good deal more attention front the newspapers than from medical Jour nals Is that useful adjunct to tho police force who is known as the police surgeon. Here his duties seldom, If ever, go be yond the office of diagnosing ailments, attending Illness and preventing tho spread of contagion. But in France he oftentimes brinks'to bear upon mysterious crimes the acumen of his trained intelli gence and the knowledge of his practical profession. He is likely to act as an as sistant to the detectives along the linos of his expert observation. Four years ago one of the "legal doc tors ' of the police force received bis noti fication, to accompany gendarmes to the scene of a death-that of a woman inn keeper. The apartment where the woman bad been found dead bad not been dis turbed; 1 be legal doctor bad full play for his faculty of observation. He went all over the room and used bis microscope at various places and on sev eral objects that appeared to Interest film particularly. At last ha Inquired tba name of the last vessel that had rome In It proved to be the Donna Maria, from Sicily. He delivered bis opinion, then, without a moment's delay or a sigh of uncertainty. “A left handed man wearing a slight mustache murdered this woman. He Is probably a Sicilian, who arrived on the Donna Marla. He Is more than 5 feet ti inches in height. He was acquainted with his victim, having been a guest previous ly at her inn. So he knew that she often got drunk. He broke in, killed her be cause he feared she would awaken while he was robbing the place and made good his escape. He has In his pocket now the stump of the candle he used to light him in committing his crime. Make a swift search for a stranger answering this de scription.” While one of the Havre detectives has tened to take up the quest, the doctor gave his reason for reducing all these details: “In entering the murderer cut himself at the door, and a blood stained splinter of the wood makes it clear that he is left handed. To one side of the spot where the blood dripped on the floor you can see some candle grease; that is where his candle dripped. It. is obvious that, W’hile he held in his left hand trie weapon he used, he carried the candle in the right. When I put tho microscope on the candle droppings I could recognize them as com ing from a Sicilian candle, having studied very closely the Bertlllon collection of candles, assembled from ail parts of the world. I now surmised that anyone who would he using a Sicilian candle must have just arrived from Sicily. In the can dle greases there appeared two small red dish hairs very different in their texture from those which grow In the beard. The assassin must have stood there, holding the candle after he committed the murder, while he debated bis crime and his next procedure.” It was not long before tho detective brought in a Sicilian named Foforazzo, who had been one of the Donna Maria's pasesngers. The doctor, having a piece of paper ready, offered it to him. Ho -reached out his left. hand, which was cut, to take It. When they searched him the candle end was found in his pocket, and when they questioned him he confessed the murder. I NDBRWOOD HAS WON HIS SPURS From the Nashville Tennessean. Chairman Underwood of the House ways and means committee, who has shown great skill In his leadership for tariff revision and#who lias demonstrated his ability and knowledge, bas won his spurs as the rhampton of democratic poli cies and principles. Never before has the democratic parti been so nearly a unit on- those tilings that vitally effect the American people as is shown in the unanimity of senti ment and opinion respecting revision of the tariff on a revenue raising basis. Chairman Underwood has made good in his leadership of the great cause, hav ing fully met the exepctatlgns of Ills friends and completely disappointed his enemies in that he has failed to do what his enemies 'hoped ho would do, and done what his friends proclaimed would be his course In Congress. "One of the democratic figures which stand out In fine and high relief in the battle for tariff reform,” says the Balti moer Sun, "Is that of Chairman Under wood of the ways and means committee. His explanation of the principle on which reductions In Tates have been based, emphasizes the same point which Presi dent Wilson dwelt on in Ms message to Congress—the advantage of competition, not only to the consumer, but to the manufacturer and the producer. Its 'wholesome Influence' In the development of commerce and the extension of busi ness as w-ell as In the relief of the peo ple.” In commenting further, that paper pais Chairman Underwood a fine tribute, sav ing: "During the .arnpaign for the demo cratic nomination there were suggestions from time to time that Mr. Underwood's heart was not wholly given to tariff re form, and that when he reached certain, crucial items he might flinch. There was really no basis for these suggestion?, for Mr. Underwood's course has been singu larly frank, straightforward and manly at every stage of tariff revision, and he has shown himself during former as well as present discussions of the subject In line with popular sentiment and absolute ly independent of sectional or business interests or Influences. The statement which accompanies the tariff bill just submitted to Congress ronrirms the fine public impression of Mi'. Underwood aa a man of genuine democratic sympathies, of broad patriotism and of far-reaching vision. He towers up strong and clean and able among the present day leaders of democracy." Credit for an intelligent and equitable revision of the tariff, which must cer tainly come, will he due largely to the zealous and faithful service of such men as Chairman Underwood, who have la bored hard and long to do in this mattar what the democratic party has been en trusted to do by the American people In its emphatic and positive instructions as were ever given to a political party. Among tbo many able and faithful democrats who are standing with Chair man Underwood hi this fight Is Judge Cordell Hull of the Fourth district of Tennessee. He prepared the income tax feature of the tariff bill, which has withstood, the assaults of Its enemies and grown stronger with those who favor this new and untried way of raising rev enue for the federal government. He has performed this service as he has per formed all his duties as a public ser vant—he has performed it faithfully and well, and the democrats of Tennessee and the nation are proud of him and grate ful for his work as they are proud of Chairman Underwood and grateful fog his work. UNDERWOOD NOT WORRYING From the Kansas City Star. Mr. Underwood, having the votes, Is willing to let the other aide have the talk. IN THE WOOD OF FINVARA By Arthur Symons. I have grown tired of sorrow, and human tears; Life Is a dream in the night, a fear among tears, A naked runner lost in a storm of spears. I have grown tired of rapture and love's desire; Love Is a' flaming heart, and Its dames aspire Till they cloud the Soul in the smoke of a windy lire. I would wash the dust of the world In a soft green flood; Here, between sea and sea, In a fairy " wood, I have found a delicate, wave greeit soli tude. Here. In the fairy wood, between sea and sea. I have heard the song of a fairy bird In a tree. I And tbe peace that is not In the world fcas flown to me.