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The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, September 18, 1913, Image 4

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£. \V. BARRETT.Editor
Entered at the Birmingham, Ala.,
lostoflice as second class matter under
‘ict of Congress March 3, 1873.
Dally and Sunday Age-Herald . $8.00
Daily and Sunday per month ... .70
Dally and Sunday, three months.. 2.00
Weekly Age-Herald, per annum .. .o0
(unday Age-Herald . 2.00
A. J. Eaton, Jr., and O. E. Young are
die only authorized traveling repre
lenfatives of The Age-Herald in ita
drculation department.
No communication will be published
without its author's name. Rejected
Manuscript will not be returned unless
(tamps are enclosed for that purpose.
Remittances can be made at current
rate of exchange. The Age-Herald will
lot be responsible $pr money sent
through the malls. Address.
Birmingham, Ala.
Washington bureau, 20/ Hlbbs build
European bureau, 6 Henrietta street.
Covent Garden, LoriOon.
Eastern business office, Rooms 48 to
50, inclusive, Tribune building, New
fork city; Western business office,
Tribune building. Chicago. The ^
Beckwith Special Agency, agents lot
eign advertising.
Bell (private exchange connectlu* all
lepartmen<»>. Mala 4W0.
( My father's wit, and my mother’s
longue, assist me!
—Love's Labor Lost.
Mary the Manager
It would be indelicate to remark
that Queen Mary wears the trousers;
likewise indecorous to intimate that
King George is henpecked. The limita
tions of the English language are dis
covered to be woeful when some sub
jects are discussed. To be as euphe
mistic* as possible, it is hereby sug
gested that the Archbishop of Can
terbury got the crowns sadly confused
in the last coronation exercises at
• Westminster.
The cables are kept fairly busy de
scribing the haughtiness of Queen
Mary; her fervent insistence upon a
revival of all the antiquated cere
monies that once hedged British sov
ereignty. She is at once court criterion
ond court censor. Her dictum regu
lates how the roast beef shall be
roasted, and her decree fixes the num
ber of inches that must be measured
from chin and floor by the frocks of
all females who come into her pres
ence. She is the grand Pooh Bah, the
factotum, the major domo, the Handy
Andy and the inflexible czarina rolled
in one.
It would be superfluous to recount all
the idiosyncracies that have been man
11 ested by Queen Mary since her ac
'cession. They are numerous. One will
suffice: The young Prince of Wales
. lias been set up in an establishment of
his own. Among the employes of the
palace was a young French laundress,
whom the Prince perhaps had never
seen. But Queen Mary saw her. "Too
pretty,” said her gracious majesty;
‘ let her go at once to the grand keeper
of the privy purse, become possessed
ol' her perquisites—then vanish.”
The approaching marriage of the
young, wealthy and beloved Duchess
of Fife has afforded ample play for
Queen Mary's officious intermeddling.
The Queen’s only daughter was in
vited to be one of the bridesmaids. The
Duchess wanted a favorite cousin to
he first bridesmaid. Nothing doing.
“My daughter shall be first brides
maid or no bridesmaid at all," was her
ukase. And it was so ordered.
Some of the noblewomen of Eng
land conceived an idea that in view of
the bride’s deserved popularity, a
wedding gift from tile people would
be appropriate, and they set about to
raise a fund. The trouble was they
failed to take the Queen into consid
eration. When Mary heard of it, she
ordered the movement abandoned and
all donations returned. “Only the bride
cf the heir to the throne should be the
recipient of such a present,” she an
nounced, and, as usual, she had her
■It is a continued story. One often
wonders which lives in greater fear,
George of England of his wife, or his
cousin and double, Nicholas of Russia,
of the nihilists.
Where Is the Leak?
The Philadelphia Public Ledger a
lew days ago had this little news item:
“Tomatoes sold at 5 cents a basket to
the green grocer yesterday. The con
sumer paid 10 cents a quarter of a
peck, or 70 cents a basket. These
prices represented two extremes yes
On another page of the same issue
of the Public Ledger was this: “Fig
ures were quoted at a meeting of the
newly formed Retail Butchers’ asso
ciation last night to show that the
prices of dressed beef sold to retailers
here by packing houses have increased
100 per cent in the last 10 years.”
' It is a dark and stormy night for
the ultimate consumer. What is the
matter? Assuredly there is no green
grocers’ trust. If the small shop keep
er could sell tomatoes cheaper than
his neighbor and rival just around the
corner, and still make a fair profit, he
would do so.
It is the “middle man,” some say.
But there is no “middle men’s” trust.
' Mr. Middle Man, like the rest of his
fellow beings, is simply trying to
make a living and ^ay up a little for
the rainy day. With the green grocer’s
and the retail butcher’s, his “over
] head” charges are enormous. Each of
them must pay licensd, rents for wa
t«r, light and building, fire and life in
surance and those other little items
that make life hardly worth t{ie liv
ing, and he must pay high prices for
everything in which he does not deal
himself. ,
Legions of doctors are ready with
their favorite panaceas for the cure of
this disease of the body economic.
Bflt none of them seems exactly to fit
the case.
Huerta’s Message
Despite alarming rumors of turmoil
and bloodshed, Mexico’s Independence
Day passed quietly and peacefully,
President Huerta was the recipient of
an ovation which seemed to show that
in the capital at least he has much
strength. *
On the whole, General Huerta’s mes
sage to Congress is a sane and sober
document. One feature of it may cause
a slight feeling of apprehension, how
ever. It was his recommendation that
there be no extension of the time
American warships may remain in
Mexican waters. The six months
named by the Mexican Congress will
expire next month. Little prospect
now exists that peace will have been
restored by that time, and the United
States may insist that its warships be
permitted to continue to ride at an
ehor off the Mexican coast.
President Huerta had little to say
regarding the negotiations between his
provisional government and Wash
ington. He again fell into the error,
however, of intimating that President
Wilson is not upheld in his policies by
the people of this country. Of course,
(here could be no greater mistake.
The Mexican elections are to be held
next month, and General Huerta says
he hopes that order will have been re
stored beford that time. However
such an outcome might be wished, it
is hardly to be looked for. The pro
visional president’s statement that he
would regard it as a great triumph to
be able to turn the government over
to his successor with the country on a
basis of stable tranquility while
laudable is hardly satisfying. What the
United. States wants is a statement
without strings that he has no inten
tion of attempting to succeed himself.
An Example of Bossism
Aboard the Baltic the day he sailed
for Europe,^fcayor Gaynor had a nota
ble interview with James Creelman.
To Mr. Creelman Judge Gaynor ex
pressed the hope that his life would
be spared that he might return to
New York to finish the great task he
had undertaken.
“I’ll strip the Tammany gang bare’
I’ll not spare a one,” he said.
Then he told Mr. Creelman some
things of which he had never spoken
before. Asked if it was true that Mur
phy had warned him he need not ex
pect a renomination unless he removed
Police Commissioner Waldo, Mayor
Gaynor answered that it was true and
that he had received the message sev
eral times.
“Do you know, Creelman,” he went
on, “that - (naming one of the
most powerful of Tammany leaders)
once actually attempted to corrupt
Commissioner Waldo? He got Waldo
in a room and there and then tried to
buy protection for gambling houses.”
The south has heard much of “boss
ism,” and even has known some who
tried to set thmselves up as political
dictators, but never has such braa^n
rascality as this existed here.
The $650,000 Necklace
The story of a $650,000 pearl neck
lace being kicked about the streetsypf
the world's largest city sounds more
like a page from Dumas or Stevenson
than a coldly dispassionate news item
from London.
The string of jewels, said to be the
most valuable of its kind in the world,
was stolen from the mails while in
transit from Paris to London. It is re
ported that Mrs. W. K. Vanderbilt is
to be the purchaser. When the packet,
supposed to be the original, was
opened in London, instead of the neck
lace it contained a number of pieces
pf French sugar. Later three English
men and two Austrians were arrested
while trying to dispose of some of the
Now a laborer finds 58 of the
precious stones on a sidewalk in High
bury. All but one of the original 61
have been recovered. How came the
necklace to be left in the street?
Fright is probably the answer. It is
easily imagined that, alarmed by the
arrest of five of the gang, the others
sought to get rid of the pearls as
quickly as possible, and threw them
into the street.
It just happened that they were
found by an honest man.
The Literary DigeBt says: '"A news
paper editor who started 90 years ago
with 43 cents has. by living frugally and
practicing rigid economy, managed to save
$100,000, partly due to the fact that an
uncle died and left him $99,999." What
we want to know is how he managede to
save the remaining 56 cents. It is passing
Manufacturers of a certain cigarette are
row giving a 5-cent package of chewing
gum «•» a premium with each 5-cent pack
age of cigareltes. It should not be long
now until grand pianos are offered with
the alleged "coffin tacka.” I
A pessimistic paragrapher in the Jack
sonville Metropolis says: “The govern
ment „having moved to dissolve the coal
trust, there la now a good excuse for an
other advance in price." Why speak of
unpleasant things, old man?
The Booster edition of The Ensley En
terprise in highly creditable. It is in fact
one of the ihost brilliant special editions
over published in the Birmingham dis
trict. Editor Hill is being warmly con
gratulated on his efforts.
Sir Thoma* L. ip ton says he is highly
pleased with the rules and regulations
for the races for the America's cup. The
genial Sir Thomas can even smile when
his Shamrocks are lost In the distance.
An Anniston preacher “made a plea for
the beautiful” in an address to the ma
triculates of Noble institute, and each of
the young women thought he was ad
dressing his remarks specifically at her.
The football season is upon us. Rejoice
and be exceeding glad, for when the col
lege boy and the college team come to
I town it would he indeed sad to be found
with a melancholy countenance..
/__ •
The railrouds of the country will need
$4,000,01X1,000 in new capital in the next
five years. Anybody who has this slim
idle may now have a chance to put it out
at good interest.
There’s some consolation to be derived
from the fact that Governor Sulzer is
at once to be put on trial. The news
papers will have less space to devote to
the Thaw case. #
Tjiaw’s attorneys have arranged to carry
his case to the United States supreme
court if necessary. As long as the money
holds out they will probably find it nec
The army is said to be having difficulty
in getting young officers to volunteer for
the aerial corps. This shows that as a
rule our lieutenants are possessed of good
Queen Mary of England is said to have
found a diary kept by Queen Victoria
when a girl. If ever it is given to the
public it will be in expurgated form.
Somehow, or other we can't imagine any
southern gentleman refusing to give up
a lower berth to any lady, to say noth
ing of the President's daughter.
Prof. John Bassett Moore denies that
lie is going to retire from the state de
partment. Mr. Bryan can go right ahead
With his lecture tour.
And now they say that the Thaw case
is likely to go to the supreme court.
Which means that Harry will be free for
some years perhaps.
The "Mustard Flutter" is said to be the
latest dance. It probably will not be
seen in Birmingham until real cold
weather comes.
Stop growling about this weather and
be thankful that the State Fair is not
scheduled for these inclement days.
Chicago dressmakers say a few women
spend $7u/‘0O a year on dress. Only a few
could afford to do so.
The suffragettes seem to have the only
workable scheme to cut down the cost
of living.
From "Peru and the Opening of the
Canal,’’ Peter M&cQuetn, F. R. G. S., in
National Magazine for September.
At the exposition restaurant one even
ing during my stay in Lima I was the
guest of Senor Alberto Larco Herrera, a
prominent Peruvian of Trujillo, whom I
met on the steamer. Senor Larco is a
graduate of Cordell University, class of
1898. Our companion was Homulo E.
Garcia, one of the editors of T,a Preusa, a
very clever young journalist of the Amer
ican type. Around us were a galaxy of
literary men, among whom was the fa
mous Peruvian jicet, Jose Galvez, who
has written some very elegant verse upon
the old Spanish influence in Peru. Thd
restaurant was ns fine as the best in New
York: the men were brilliant and the
women beautiful, and 1 have never tasted
viands more retlshable and rare. Senor
Larco proposed to me a visit to Dr. Jose
Toribio Polo, Peru’s most industrious and
conscientious historian. Accordingly, next
morning my friend came for me in his
automobile and wc went to the home of
the great man. Tt was a quaint old Span
ish house on one of the squares, with
flowers, bird song and sunshine. As vve
entered the study of the litterateur, *ve
were greeted with Castilian courtesy by a
modest and scholarly man. Laco told him
that I was interested in Peru. The his
torian was delighted and showed me his
private collection of rare old books and
manuscripts, and the manuscript of his
greatest work, "A History of the Vice
roys." Senor Polo was much interested
in the work on Peru by our own clever
historian, Prescott.
polo has in his collection a- letter of
marque and reprisal against the vessels
of France, signed by President Adams.
When T told hlm.Hhat Adams was the
first signer of the Declaration of Inde
pendence be waved his hands with de
light and fondled the letter as though lie
had discovered a long lost or neglected
child. Among his letters also- was^ the
first grammar of file old Peruvian tongue,
written by hand In 1GM; the autograph
of Plzarro; the actual death sentence -;f
Gen. Mateo Garcia, who was the first Pe
ruvian lo draw Hie sword against the
King of Spain. He was setitenee^to be
hanged, his head to lie sent to Cuzco, 1 is
right arm to Arcquipa, his left aim tu he
exposed in tlie square at Lima and his
body reduced to ashes, as a warning. I
actually could read myself the Spanish
words written "» the document by the
executioner, Jauan Ramirez: "Immedi
ately Hie sentence was executed, after
time was given for spiritual preparation,
which 1 certify.” Spain took no chances
with rebellious subjects, and thin was ill
1815, the j^ar of the battle of Waterloo."
---- --
From the Electrical World.
A new automobile head lump which rep
resents a radical departure from present
designs has made its appearance In
France. The lamp lius the shapd'of a
! Human eyejiul! and turns in Its socket in
| exactly tile same manner as the eye. Two
I sniuII clamps controlled by thumb screws
j from the interior of the car hold the
lump In position ill any desired direction,
I while Hie handle itself'is used In turning
j :ho light rays to the side they are
I acceded.
RiiftincHN Improving
"Business is picking up—it is. indeed,
becoming very brisk, * said 9. T. 9c ton
of Chicago. “'August was a quiet nionih.
Business is usually dull the latter part of
August and always dull In the first part
of September, but there Ift much activity
in evidence now*.
“I predict that by the lust of Septem
ber we will have something like a real
boom. The western crops are very large.
Wheat has made a new. high record in
the west; and in the couth there is a
great cottcfn crop—next to the high rec
ord crop. Crops naturally m ike business/'
The Hofei Tutwiler
“Work is progressing on the Hotel Tut
wiler steadily and some of the artistic
effects can now be appreciated/’ said an
esthetic citizen. “The outer wall on the
cast side is going up. The marble work
on Fifth avenue is beautiful in its sim
plicity and I can see that it will be very
effective from an esthetic viewpoint.
“Robert Jemison, Jr., as the rental
agent of the hotel, negotiated a leuse with
the United Hotels company—the best
hotels company in the United States. I
asked Mr. Jemison tlie otiter day when
he expected to have the hotel ready for
opening. He replied that he hoped to
have it ready by the first of March. He
admitted, however, that it might he a lit
tle later before it could be occupied. My
guess is that it will lie the first of June
before the hotel is opened. But a few
months will make small difference in a
great enterprise like this.
“When th© Tutwiler is completed it
i will be jthe finest hotel in all the south,
with the possible exception of the Jeffer
j son hotel in Richmond. It will, when
finished, represent an outlay of fully $1,
500,000, and I doubt if there is another
hotel south of Chicago or west of the
Mississippi river that jvill compare with
l)ralh off Dlntingrulnheri Kentuckian
"Medical science lost a distinguished
man in the death q,f Dr. Thomas E. Pick
ett of “Xtaysvflle, Ky..” said a Kentuckian.
“He had not been i.i active practice^ for
10 years or more, but he kept in close
touch with his propesslon. According %>
Who's Who in America,’ Dr. Pickett was
[ born in Mason county, Kentucky, Jan
uary 11, 1841. He graduated from Center
college at Danville, Ky., in 1860. He wj^s
surgeon assistant in the Peninsular cam
paign of General Grant in the summer
of 1864; was in Hospital and dispensary
practice in Philadelphia, 1865-6. He began
practice at Maysville in 1866. He was the
first fo Introduce massage and mobiliza
tion aftd treatment of fractures in the
Cnited States. He was a fellow of thu
American Academy of Medicine and other
scientific fraternities.
"Dr. Pickett, besides being an able phy
sician, was a man of letters. He was a
facile writer and c/ntribuYd to many
publications. He was specially interested
in the mound builders, and few men out
side o'f the field of anthropology, tech
nically speaking, have been regarded such
good authority h.t Dr. Pickett.
“In the Public Ledger of Maysville of
September 13 the Rev. Dr. John Barbour,
for several years pastor of the South
Highlands Presbyterian church, con
tributes a sketch of the deceased, which
embraces a full estimate of his charac
ter and lifework. After speaking of his
literary pursuits and, his contributions of
archuelogical lore. Dr. Barbour says:
“ ‘The ingenious and learned author
took special pride In following the Anglo
Norman into Kentucky, where the British
element has been least mixed with other
races. In tffie Kentuckian's^ fearlessness
and independence, his spirit of adventure
leading even to distinction on the sea,
Ills love of horses and Ids chivalry to
ladies; his fondness for litigation, and
his picturesque personality and speech,
as well as in th* Norman names which
still linger among us, he found a strik
ing proof of the enduring leadersVp of
the Norman.
“ ‘It may well be asked how one whose
mind dealt so fully with these general
questions, could keep up a laborious prac
tice. Tlie question betrays the narrow
ness of the view we Americans usually
take of life. The greatest German and
French scholars are often active in gov
ernmental service or in professional prac
tice. Disraeli, the man of letters, was
England's greatest chancellor of the ex
chequer; Lord Haldane, the greatest au
thority in England on Germar* metaphys
ics. lias been surpassed by none as sec
retary of war and lord chancellor. 'Jtieo
dore Rooseveelt and Woodrow Wilson
have both been learned scholars and* also
intrepid men of action. Dr. Pickett** mind
was of this large and inclusive type.’ ’’
The Auditorium
"l voted for Mr. Ward, and am delight
ed with his victory. I am also delighted
with the large majority cast for the audi
torium proposition,” said a member of
the Chamber of Commerce.
"I was sorry to learri from Wednes
day’s paper that no action was to be
taken In regard to an election until the
full board of commissioners could be as
sembled. I am sorry, too, that Judge
Lane is in poor health and needs a long
rest. A vacation will doubtless restore
Judge Lane, but In case he is not able
to return to his duties in the city hall
within a few weeks, Commissioners Exum
and Weatherly should consider them
selves a full board and order an audi
torium bond election.
“As was harped on in the recent cam
paign, Birmingham need*# nothing so
much at this time as an auditorium with
a seating capacity of 9noo or 10.000. If the
auditorium bond election, is held next
month, ground should be broken for the
building no later than November, and
that would mean that the building would
be ready for use by the last, of May
I’ntronlxe Southern Inilustry
"The large ‘ad carried in The Age
Herald Sunday, September 14, for ‘Lynch
| *burg shoes’ was decidedly unique and cer
| tainly deserves to be effective,” remarked
; Henry F. Beaumont, a Birmingham ad
I vertising man. *
' "Undoubtedly if this ad is followed lip
j by others along the same line it will
create a responsive sentiment worth much.
The matter published, arranged attrae
I tlvely, is a singular expression of com
j munity spirit and pride. It did not ad
vertise any brand of Lynchburg shoes,
| but instead*adve^tised all shoes made in
Lynchburg. I visited that city several
I years ago and was surprised both at its
enterprises, its many charms and the nu
I merous large shoe factories which it had.
| Lynchburg is beyond doubt the largest
shoe-making center south of Boston and
as far as I know is the only southern
city actually manufacturing footwear.
From personal tests, for T have worn
‘Lynchburg-made’ shoes, the product'of
the leading factories of this Virginian
burg is equul to that of any on the
American continent, in quality and in
style, and it really behooves loyal south
erners to buy Lynchburg-made shoes
where possible.
‘Here in Birmingham we preach and''
practice ‘patronize home industry.* To
wear ‘Lynchburg-made shoes’ is no less
than a form of that polfcy, for since we
have no shoe factory here then we should
buy ‘sduthern-made’ shoes, custom given
any form of southern industry eventually
benefiting the south and its people.
“Lynchburg deserves great credit for
this manifestation of progressiveness and
its citizens should be proud of its ’rank
as the south's shoe center, the fifth in
importance in this utilitarian line in the i
whole world.’’
Dy. Taylor’s Trip
Dr. H. W. Taylor, the well known drug
gist, has returned from a vacation tiip
in the west.
‘‘I enjoyed my trip to the fullest ex
tent,” said ^Dr. Taylor—"I spent a week
or so in Colorado—two days in Denver.
Colorado is a great state anti Denver
is a very attractive city.^It seeing some
what larger than Birmingham, and ac
cording to the 1910 census its population
tVas considerably larger than tha: of .Bir
mingham. It is quite it metropolitan
city, but all in all it does not begin to
compare with Birmingham in business
“The tourist business in Colorado has
been quite large this year and it is this
• lass df business that makes D silver.
When it comes to a solid basis Denver
is simply not in it with Birmingham.”
♦ The I<ulid ('ongreNK
“The public men of Birmingham are
beginning to realize that the Alabama
i>aml congress, to 15e held in November,
will be not only an Important event, but
a far-reaching event in its effect on
values,” said a well known upbullder.
“President N. F. Thompson of the land
congress did successful Work in organ
izing the first congress in Mobile a year
“In arranging for the congress to be
held in Birmingham, Mr. Thompson has
done splendid work. A full programme
will be published shortly, and it will in
clude aduresses by' many distinguished
men. Alabama is second to no state In
the union in its resources. The Birming
ham district is so well known through
out the world, and is attracting all the
while so much new capital, that no or
ganized exploitation of its resources is
needed. In a general way the same thing
might be said of Alabama from an agri
cultural point of view. But we have in
this state vast stretches of farm land.
Those of us who are here know how fer
tile this* land can be made and wiiat
profitable crops can be cultivated, but the
northern homeseekers may not know
fully; therefore the importance of the
land congress.”
From the National Magazine for October,
concerning “My Wanderings,” the book
of Reminiscences by Henry Clay Bar
nabee. *~
it was an important step In the life r.f
Henry Clay Barnabee when lie joined the
choir of the home church at Portsmouth,
N. H. The male quartette, of which he
was a member, went serenading through
and about Portsmouth with such effect
that only the stern parental veto pre
vented the four from “taking the road”
and gathering prestige and profit in the
surrounding villages. Meanwhile, in the
more practical walks of life. Mr. Barna
bee for four years served in the dry goods
emporium of “William Jones & Son,”
during wb.icjj he made ills first visit to
Boston, and at the old museum saw Ju
nius Brutus Booth, father of, Edwin and
John Wilkps Booth, in John Howard
Payne’s tragedy of “Brutus.” It was
during the engagement of September 10,
1840, that Edwin Booth made his stage
debut, “playing the small part of Tressel
to his father’s Duke of Gloucester in
‘Richard HI.’ ”
Young Bafnaoee came to Boston per
manently, be explains In his recent book
of reminiscences, “My Wanderings”
(Chappie Publishing Company, Boston),
when lie passed l.is twenty-first birthday,
and became a salesman with C. F. Hovey
& Co., with whom he remained 11 years.
During this period his Interest in the
stage constantly increased. He tells of
hearing Oliver Wendell Holmes read
‘Dorothy Q” at an Old South entertain
ment with the historic painting pierced
by the rapier thrust on the platform he- !
side him. Dr. Smith followed with "My
Country, ’Tls of Thee,” and Ralph Waldo
Emerson with his "Concord Hymn.”
Curiously enough, the elder Hovey of
C. F. Jlovey & Co., his employers, at
tended some of these entertainments fjtid
was struck with the evident capabilities
of his salesman, and far from being dis
pleased, advised him to cultivate his tal
ents with a viewr of greater successes. A
littre flirtation with tragedy promised
well, but fortunately was not a lifelong
attachment, and it was in the choir of
the church of the Unity, in connects
with w'hich he saw 22 years of nearly con
tinuous choral service, that Mr. Barnabee
was to find the associates and friends who
were tndinly instrumental in building up
the two geratest comic opera companies
that have ever visited and delighted
American cities.
Willard Huntington Wright in October
Smart Set. ,
The casual Sunday school superintend
ent, bursting with visions <>f luxurious
gaieties, his brain incited by references to
Wiener blut, his corpuscles tripping to
the strains of some Viennese schlager
musik. will suffer only disappointment as
he sallies forth on his first night in Vi
enna. He is a lovely, mellow creature, a
virtuoso of the domestic virtues when
home, hut now, at large in Europe, he
craves excitement. His timid soul is bent
on participating In the deviltries for
which Vienna is famous. His blood is
thumping through his arteries in three
four time., But he is brought gradually
to the realization that something is amiss.
lie expected to find a city which would
be one roseate and romantic revel, given
over to joys of the flesh, to wine drinking
and confetti throwing, overrun with •hus
sies, gone mad with lascivious waltzes,
reeking with Babylonish amours. He
dreams of Vienna as one continual de
bauch. one never ceasing saturnalia, an
tournament of perfumed hilarities.
But as he walks down the Karntner
strasse, encircles the ring and stands
| with bulging inquisitive eyes on the cor
j ner of tlie Wiedner Hauptstrasse and
I Karlsplatz. he wonders what can be the
j matter. Where, indeed, is that prodigality
| of flowers and spangled satin he has
j heard so much about? Where are those
super-orchestras sweating over'the scores
of seductive waltzes? The excesses of
merrymaking $re nowhere discoverable.
Dee Moines or Camilen would present
quite as festive a spectacle, he thinks,
' as he gazes up at the sepulchral shadows
ion the gigantic Opernbaus before him. Hex
| cannot understand the nocturnal sblitude
: of the streets. There is actual desolation '
1 about him. ' • 1
’ adrift with the times
He waited on the corner,
With fond emotions rife;
And waited for an hour.
But not upon his wife.
If she had so delayed him,
'Stead of the girl who did,
The anger that consumed him
He never could have hid.
And yet, we heard him humming
A happy little tune,
And yet, we saw him smiling,
That sunny afternoon,
As if the sweetest fancies
Were flitting through his brain.
And all the world around him
Held not a tiace of pain.
“Is this comedian very original?”
“In the matter of legs there is no
doubt of it.” ^
“The optimist expects the best; the pea
s'mist goes out and looks for the worst,”
says the Chicago Record-Herald. And
the optimist dies waiting, while the pes
simist usually finds what he is looking^
for. Yet, personally, we still take a hope
ful view of* life.
“With the youngsters at school, home is
a .quieter place.”
“Quite true, but It’s quiet at a time
when I can't be there."
"The fight had hardly started before
a policeman ran swiftly to the scene and
ceparated the'eombatants.”
“He ran swiftly, you say?"
"Yes. He hadn’t been on the force long
enough to become fat.”
"That's a bright boy of yours. Of
course you expect him to make a fine
record at college?”
“Yes, Indeed. I've already written a
personal letter to the football coach ask
ing him what he thinks of my boy's pros
"Blimmer Is going to send his daughter
ibroad to finish her musical education.’*
“That shows he’s an indulgent father.**
“And it show's he’s a good neighbor,
IN TURN. • f
“The science of eugenics discounts the
‘personal equation.’ ”
“Ves, but not half as much as the 'per
sonal equation’ discounts eugenics.”
"I sec where gunmen In New' Tork hav.
l>ad another street battle."
"I’m glad I live In a town where most
of the shooting affrays are participated
In by only two persons."
"I was with Grant," the stranger said;
Said the farmer, "Say ho more, t
But rest thee here at my cottuge porch, ’
For thy feet are weary and sore."
"I was with brant," the stranger said;
Said the farmer, "Say no more,
1 prithee sit at my frugnl board,
And eat of my humble stbre.
"How fares my boy—my soldier boy,
Of tbe old Ninth array corps?
[ warrant lie bore him gallantly *
In the smoke and the battle's roar!" i
"I know him not," said the aged man,
"And as I remarked before,
[ was with Grant—.” "Nay. nay, I know,"
Said the farmer, "Say no more;
"He fell In battle? I see, alas!
Thou'dst smooth these tidings o'er— ‘
Nay, speak the truth, whatever It l>»,
Though It rend my bosom's core.
"How fell he—with his face to the foe,
Upholding the flag he bore?
Oh, say not that my boy disgraced
The uniform that lie wore!"
"I cannot tell.” said the aged man,
"And should have remarked before,
That I was with Grant—In Illinois
Some three years before the war."
Then the'fanner spake him never a worn,
But beat with his fist full sore,
That aged man, who had worked fot
Some three years before the war.
—Bret Hart*.
"Some old fellow, spend nearly all th.lt *
time talking about the weather^*
"Well, the weather Is a safe subject.
People seldom fight about the weather."
* M ■■ ■■ ■! ■
From* the Louisville Courier-Journal.
THE story from London that the au
thorities In British India will for
bid the appearance of Maud Allan
upon the Anglo-Tndlan stage upon the
ground that her manner of dancing might
Injuriously affect the prestige of English
women in India Is probably not merely a
press agent's tale. % *
The British throughout their Asian pos
sessions are energetic in their efforts to
keep the natives under the impression
trtat they are a superior race, and there
fore divinely appointed to rulership. De
spite the differences between social con-,
ventions in various purls of the world, all
men in all countiies and In all states of
social development value and respect
modesty and chastity in women. The
British, therefore, would have their for
eign subjects believe that all English
women are aoove reproach. In further
ance ofjthelr efforts in thfs direction the
British authorities lake elaborate precau
tions to prevent any English woman of
bad character from entering n British
crown colony or dependency. They very
freely admit disreputable women who reg
ister as being of other nationalities than
■ In India dancing girls are ranked witn
vocationally Immoral women. Out of the
oast, and especially from India, come the
suggestive dances which have become
popular upon the western stage and,
with certain modifications, in western
ballrooms. It is not Improbable that the
appearance of Maud Allan, whose fame
has been won In lamdon, would be dis
turbing to the British in Bombay ani
Calcutta. The natives would perhaps see
no distinction between dances called
"artistic interpretations” and the familiar
muscle dances of the Nautch girls, and
It has been Impressed upon the Hindu
mind that Nauteh girls are an unclean
Outcropping of an unclean religion against
which every English missionary strives.
It might alsp be difficult to drill into
Oriental minds the western 'Idea that
there may be a great difference between
'one's professional and personal morals, if
one Is a dancer of artistic Interpretative
dances, just as there Is popularly admitted'
to be a difference between the personal
and political honesty of a •'practical" pol
itician. The Hindu mind might see In
London's favorite dancer, not^the artist
with a private personality detached from
her art, and perhaps puritanical, but
merely the woman dancing dances not
wholly unlike those . danced by the
Nautchee attached to the Hindu temples,
or by the humbler, hut equally skillful
street dancing Kiris of the Indian cities.
But if It Is true that Bombay and Cal
cutta, Delhi ami Ogra and the other In
dian cities boasting Anglo-Indian thea
tres will warn off Maud Allan, what will
the British do if the turkey trot is
brought east of Suez by British society?
Although Borne of the magazine writers
, in New York and London persist In re
garding the "motif" and movements of
the present-day dsnees as having come
from Africa, and persist in using the
term "nigger dances," it is probable that
all that the Afrleun natives know about
dances that Interpret animal Instincts
was learned from the eust as a result or
migrations from Asia into Egypt and
other North African countries. At any
rate, the unmodified "vtlggle" dances that
were a feature of the social life of the
Negro tenderloin in America years ago
are spmewtiat akin to Nautch dancing.
Poll te society adopted them lit a form so
modified that the ballroom turkey trot
is merely more or less suggestive to the
onlooker, and perhaps not at all so to
the average participant. Btjt the "to*
delo" was as brazenly descriptive as an
Indian dancing gill's gyrations..
The Sudanese "hoocliee-eoochee" girls
of the Midway Plalsance at the Colum
bian exposition are popularly credited
wlth^havtng Introduced Into America the
“pas scute" from which was evolved the
“pas sexuelle" for two, called the "to'*
delo". by the negroes and given various
names by whites. But the Sudanese and
the Arabs in Egypt and Algiers are mere
Imitators %>f the Nauteh girls. It may
li^aaid In passing that persons who fre
quented the Midway Plalsance will recajl
that the "Streets of Cqlro" had no monop*
olj* of the dance that made that conces
sion famous. The Syrian and Persian
theatres offered the same entertainment.
One of-the comic weeklies at the time t
published,a satire In the form of the ex
periences of an American traveler who
toured the Orient and in every country
found a bevy of girls in training as
"hoochee-cooehee" dancers. He was told.
In many lands and in many languages,
that the girls were preparing to Introduce
at Chicago the dance “peculiar to their
Tlie British may easily censor the An
glo-Indian stage and prevent Miss Allan
from Interpreting “Salome" to the in
jury of the prestige of the British
“Memsahlb.” But if the “MemsahH>s"
come to Indian to enliven army, post lift 1
with the turkey trot, what can scandalised i
John Bull do about that? Surely the *
natives will easily recognise the kinship
of the "trot" with the descriptive Nawtch
dances.* despite the modification In the
direction of Innocuousness. And as native
women, except dancing gills, do not dance
at all, or even appear In ballrooms,
what's to become of the prestige of Eng
lishwomen when the dances that have
stirred up *he [.ondon press become a
topic of discussion In the Anglo-Indian
papers, and In the vernacular press?
Possibly the Indian politicians who sing
the “Bande Mataram" and keep the t
native papers slr.idng with seditious ar
ticles nfay see the»day when they will
credit the turkey trot with having aided
in the struggle for autonomy' by doing
Its part to disprove the boasted superior
ity of the British. At any rate, It will bo
interesting to read what Suderenath Ban
ner,jpe and his colleagues of the Indian
press have to say when the "motif” of
the JCautch dance gets hack to India front
1-ondon In the form of the English*
“Memsahib’s" rollicking turkey trot.
Putting the Ud upon Maud Allan seems
From the New York Tribune.
In Mr. ltapgood's excellent Journal of t
Feminization our delightful friend, Mine.
Anna Pavlova, has words upon the rag
time dancing of the hour. She passes by
the question of Immorality—"morality la
a matter for the spirit,” and if thoughts
are moral the dance cannot he evil. But
she objects seriously to the one step and
Its variations for their "utter absurdity
and Inconsistency.”
. Her first criticism is that a nation should
rot give itself up to "one trivial style to
the exclusion of all others.” The second
Point is that ragtime is essentially a
"skipping dance of pure Joy,” and should
he danced alone or at most hand in
hand, without the suggestion of an em
brace involved In the normal posture of
our round dances. The sex Interest is
"irrelavant and inconsistent with the
spirit of the dance.” .
Thlp seems like sound crltlclsi*. and
with the new interest in dancing and the
new found skill which has resulted we
may yet achieve dances as beautiful and
as expressive as Mme. .Pavlova could de
sire. There Is the tungo, for instance,
which is already treading on the heels- of I
the one step. We suspect that when t|ie£
one step craze has subsided an' era '«fV
real dancing will begin, graceful, expr.es
dive and as far removed figim the exag
gerated absurdities of the one step as
from tile deadly banality of ‘the two
step, from which, ut least, the ragtime
steps delivered us.
From the National Review. (
My love Is like the mid-most day of
Whew the moon Is full.
My love is like a gazelle at the water
When It has fled the huntgr.
My love Is like the palm in the heart of t
the Zlbun. —
A tall palm tree laden with dates.
6uch Is my love for the beautiful Irena,
Irena of the Ouled Nails.
■. * S. ,■;>
My love is lilje the doves in the courts
of Alkar, ^
Tile doves with the coral feet. l
My ldvo Is like water to the thirsty trav
eler. v
The pilgrim to Meqca, "/
My love is like the sun after the Alihan,
The red sun In the desert.
Such is my love for the, heoiiUtuUMaB J
in whose heart dwell •fcoiWnic- * A

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