The Birmingham age-herald. [volume], April 28, 1914, Page 4, Image 4

About The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950

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THE AGE-HERALD
E. AA. 1IAHRETT.Editor
Entered at the Birmineham, Ala.,
postoffice as second class matter under
act of Congress March 3, IX,u._____
Daily and Sunday Age Herald—»S.0d
Dally and Sunday per month - •<“
Daily and Sunday, three months ..
Weekly Age-Herald, per annum.. .6«
Sunday Age-Hei^^ald . - ■ ■ ■ ■ • — • • • •' ~ '
A. J. Eaton. Jr., and O. E. Young are
the only authorized traveling
sentntlves of The Age-Herald in Us
circulation department. I
No communication will he published j
Without its author's name. Rejected ■
manuscript will not bo returned unless
.tamps are enclosed for that purpose
Remittances can He made at current
rate of exchange. The Age-llerald
not be responsible for money sent
through the malls. Address,
THE AGE-HERALD.
Birmingham, Ala*
Washington bureau, 207 HIbbs bulld
Europenn bureau, G Henrietta street,
Covent Garden. London.
Eastern business office, Rooms 48 to
BO, inclusive. Tribune building, New
York City, Western Business office,
Tribune building, Chicago. '1 he b. C.
Beckwith Special Agency, agents to
eigrn advertising.
telephone
Bell (private e*ehnn«e vonnedlnR all
department"), Main I'.HHI.
Did hold his eyes lock'd In her crystal
looks. —Two Gentlemen at A eronn.
BEGINNING THE I) A A—I tlinnk
Thee, l> God, thnt Thou mnkest
me unhappy when I do wrong. Make
me ever more sensitive, tlutt when
I sin even In smallest measure my
pnin may bring me l>nrk to Tliee. {
May I never Kr«n' ealloun enough
to sin w it bout suffering. In Christ's
name. Amen—H. >1. E.
The Open Door
Mary Antin, whose book on immi
jrration entitled “The Promised Land”
has made her famous, recently deliv
ered a lecture in which she said that
it was the moral duty of the United
States to welcome the immigrants
who come to our shores, no matter
what kind of people they are or where
they come from. Miss Antin based her
plea on idealistic grounds and calmly
ignored the various and sundry perils
which are said to lurk in immigra
tion.
Miss Antin did not go so far as to
ignore the fact that an “open door”
policy as regards immigration ^jight
not prove altogether advantageous to
the United States, but she said if
evils resulted and there were discom
forts to endure, it was a duty the
American people owed to humanity.
The sole distinguishing mark of this
country, she said, which makes it dif
ferent from all other countries, is the
fact that it represents equality and
the brotherhood of man. If we restrict
immigration we are no longer fulfill
ing our altruistic destiny and we are
false to the underlying principles of
this government.
It is easy to awaken sympathy for
immigrants by telling of the horrors
the Jews suffer in Russia. Miss Antin,
being of that race herself, has a mov
ing story to relate of what she has
actually seen and heard in Russia, and
when she advocates an unrestricted
immigration she pleads most strong
ly for the Russian Jew. The story of
her own family’s struggles upward
has-been told to fashionable audiences
by this woman, who has risen from
the slums to fame and is now the
wife of a Columbia professor. No one
can hear her talk without being sensi
bly affected, but even she herself con
fesses that immigration is a problem
that requires a great deal of study.
Idealists are nearly always admira
ble in their aims, but they are apt to
suffer with an impairment of their
mental vision which makes them inca
pable of seeing both sides of a ques
tion.
Economists, who are rarely given
to sentiment, contend and are ready to
prove that allowing promiscuous
hordes from foreign lands to enter
this country without discrimination is
dangerous. The brotherhood of man is
fine in theory, but mankind’s limita
tions are such that a too liberal policy
toward one’s neighbor may sometimes
result in one’s undoing.
Biographical Mysteries
Last Sunday was the three hundred
end fiftieth anniversary of the bap
tising of the man whose writings, or
those accredited to him, have exercised
upon humanity an influence second
only to that of the Biblical authors—
William Shakespeare. The day of his
baptism is thus noted, as the date of
his birth is unknown.
The record of the life of the Bard
of Avon presents the most perplexing
of biographical mysteries. The annals
are extremely meagre, there being not
the slightest proof that he ever went
to school, and from the milestones of
a monotous path it is learned that he
was licensed to marry Anne Hathaway
November 28, 1582, reached London
with an unknown occupation some
time before 1592 and bought real es
tate in his native town in 1597.
He held a considerable quantity of
wheat during a famine, sold a load of
stone to Stratford for 10 pence and the
only letter ever received by him which
is extant consists of a request from
Richard Quinley for a loan of £30.
The great bard was something of a
litigant and frequently sued his fel
low townsmen, the claims ranging
from £7 down to two shillings. He
bought and mortgaged a London
house and in 1605 purchased the right
to collect unpaid taxes. lie applied for
a grant of a coat-of-arms for his
father and in 1603 was appointed one
of his majesty’s servants for theatrical
performances. Less than a year before
his death he executed a will in which
he made no mention of a library,
copyrights or plays, and in an inter
lineation gave his wife his second-best
bed.
This is all of the record, and of the
42 plays accredited to him during his
lifetime his editors selected for print
but 25. The reconciling of the incon
gruity and the immeasurable distance
between the books and the man has
baffled philosopher, historian, states
man and dramatist; Emerson, Carlyle,
Richter, Ibsen, Goethe, Holmes and
John Bright have balked at the mys
tery and repeated the unanswerable
interrogatory.
But it boots little whether the mar
vels of literature came from the pen
of one man or from those of a band of
anonymous writers; whether they
were fashioned by the brain of Shake
speare or Bacon; their transcendent
lustre illumines our English literature
and it is the effulgency of the plays,
not that of the author or authors, that
we honor and celebrate today.
Tenseness Relieved
According to the press dispatches,
tenseness of the Mexican situation was
“distinctly relieved” yesterday when
it was formally announced that Huerta
had accepted the tender of good offices
made by Argentina, Brazil and Chile.
It was said that in both wings of the
capitol “war talk” gave way to a
spirit of conciliation.
The three South American envoys
who are acting as intermediaries
talk optimistically, and in thg war
and y*vy departments the situation is
reported as "looking much better.”
President Wilson from the very begin
ning of his administration showed
plainly that he was passionately de
voted to a peace policy toward Mex
ico, and he will send up a prayer of
thanksgiving if the mediation plans
issue successfully; that is, if an agree
ment can be reached by which Huerta
will be eliminated and the honor of
America upheld without further hos
tilities.
The Latin countries produce brilliant
diplomats, and they may be able to
propose a scheme that will at once
satisfy this country in every particu
lar, and at the same time be accept
able to the Mexicans. But it all re
mains to be seen.
If mediation comes to naught, then
there will be war on no small scale.
Certain it is that patriotic Americans
would rather see war declared tomor
row and take up arms than to have
the administration agree to any pro
posal that does not carry with it com
plete satisfaction for the outrages that
have been perpetrated in Mexico.
Preparations for war will go on as if
no mediation had been undertaken.
The Bubonic Plague
The outbreak of the bubonic plague
in Havana calls attention to the fact
that despite the adoption of sanitary
and hygienic measures this dread pes
tilence is still a factor in public calam
ities and that eternal vigilance is es
sential in affecting its eradication.
Unquestionably the plague origi
nates from dirt and filth, and rats are
a potential medium for its spread.
Cities without sewers and whose in
habitants use impure drinking water
have ever furnished victims by the
thousand to the dread disease.
The first recorded plague appeared
in the sixth century, A. D., and while
India, China and Arabia have been
conspicuous as the theatres of its ac
tivity, its deadly incursions have in
vaded Europe. The black death is re
membered as the curse of the conti
nent and the author of Robinson Cru
soe has left an interesting memorial
of the terrible “plague year” of Lon
don from 1673 to 1675, during which
over a hundred thousand men, women
and children perished.
The plague was brought to London
by two itinerant Frenchmen who Were
supposed to have contracted the dis
ease in the orient and in every ip
stance where it has prevailed in sup
posedly sanitary communities its ori
gin was traced to introduction from
a locality where hygiene and sanita
tion were not regarded. This demon
strates that dirt and filth are its gen
erators though in olden times its ap
pearance was regarded as a visitation
of divine wrath.
American supervision in the matter
of civic hygiene has transformed Ha
vana into a clean and comparatively
healthy city and the same laws that
effected the transition will eventually
work a cure for India, China and
Arabia, when invoked in those com
munities, but the disease can only be
held in check by untiring and unceas
ing vigilance. Havana has sounded
a warning.
According to a report issued by the,bu
leau of mines, microscopic diamonds ex
ist in Ontario. The diamonds occur in
chromiferous ore and while they are too
small to be of much commercial value,
they are of great scientific interest and
represent the first discovery of diamonds
in the province. Platinum diamonds and
chromium were found in a comparatively
small specimen of ore, says the report.
The steam shovel has revolutionized
tiie Industry of the southwest Kansas
coal fields, but has also brought in Its
( train accidents that were unknown be
fore its advent In the district. Most of
the accidents happen to shot firers and
they are hurt more often than the same
class of workers in shaft mines. The
fatalities are about equal In the course
of a year, but the steam shovel shot
firers suffer double the number of mi
nor injuries, such as burns and the loss
of eyesight. The method used by steam
shovel shot firers seems careless to say
the least. They drill a hole in the coal
and then drop in a third of a stick of
dynamite, to which a burning fuse is
attached. By the time the dynamite
reaches the bottom of the hole the fuse
on it has reached the cap and there is
an explosion. Immediately afterward the
men return to the hole and without tak
ing any precautions against sparks or
burning smudge from the dynamite, they
pour a charge of black blasting powder
into the hole around another fuse, which
finishes the shot. Premature explosions
are frequent and the miners are often
painfully injured.
A federal judge says Wilson and
Bryan, being drawn into war with Mex
ico in spite of their love of peace, offer
a striking example of the grim jests fate
Plays on helpless men. A jubilant army
and navy are not disposed to feel the
least bit sorry for the President and
his Secretary of State.
Mrs. Drummond, militant suffragette
leader, shouted so loud in court where
she was being tried that proceedings had
lo be stopped. The court, it seems, didn't
dare to stop Mrs. Drummond.
Press agents whose jobs depend on
their ability to “put over" stories are
in despair these days when war news
crowds out of newspapers the best yarns
they can invent.
Representative Saunders says two bat
tleships will be enough to settle Mex
ico's hash. Mr. Saunders is a “small
navy” man to the vanishing point.
Minnesota fishermen are having a dis
pute over the catfish law. It is time
for the Ulster crisis and the Mexican
imbroglio to take a back seat.
The Chicago man who committed sui
cide while his wife was giving a bridge
party chose a time when he was sure
not to be observed.
A Chicago newspaper says Coxey is as
anarchronistic as “ta-ra-ra-boom-de-ay,”
which puts him almost In the same class
with the dodo.
A letter written by Lucretia Borgia
brought $2000 in a recent sale, although
Lucretia's specialty was not letter writ
ing.
Masachusetts will not have a eugenics
marriage law after all. As a fad eu
genics never touched the common people.
Christabel Pankhurst was not permitted
to speak in Dresden. If she were in Eng
land Christabel would speak anyhow.
Learning how to dance the Argentine
tango requires time, hut time is nothing
to people with the tango habit.
J. Hamilton Lewis, whose whiskers re
semble those of the god of war, says
he is ready to go to the front.
Now that the navy is “dry” will every
new battleship be christened with a bot
tle of grape juice?
The Pittsburg man who was fined $25
for kissing a woman’s hand, got very lit
tle for Ills money.
Trolley riding is the most democratic
mode of travel in existence except walk
ing.
Cornwallis-West didn't waste much
lime in getting married again.
ONE WAY
From the New York Press.
“Please mister Jones can I get off Tues
day?’’ said the young male employe, only
more rapidly.
“Which of your relatives is dead?” in
quired the boss.
“Not any, sir," replied tlie lad with a
politeness which exists only in fiction.
“Which of your teetch are you going to
have pulled?”
“Not any, sir,” replied the lad, etc.
“Which of your sisters is getting mar
ried?”
“Not any, sir,” etc.
“The fact is," continued the youth, “1
would like to go to the hall game, and my
desire being genuine, 1 would not hazard
my chances by trying to pull a rotten old
excuse on a foxy business man. Thank
ing you, sir.”
DOWN ON THE MISSISSIPPI
From the Cleveland Leader. •
A steamboat was stranded in the Mis
sissippi and the captain could not get her
off. Eventually a hard looking fellow
came on hoard and said:
“Captain, 1 understand you want a
Pilot?”
The captain asked: “Are you a pilot?”
“Well, they call me one. '
“Do you know where the sandbanks
are?”
“No, sir.”
“Well,' how do you expect to take ihe
out of l*eic* if you don't know where
they are?”
“I know where they ain’t.” was the
rsriy.
LIKE M'LUKS SAYS
From the Cincinnati Enquirer.
If all tiie men who have sworn off as
buyers when it is their turn, would swear
off as drinkers, the prohibitionists would
elect the next President.
Another reason for the HI Cost of Div
ing is that too many poor families arc
raising aristocratic chickens. And this
takes in the parlor as well as the back
yard.
Married life gets a whole lot of knocks.
But you may have noticed that 99 per
cent of those who advertise for husbands
and wives are widows and widowers.
The trouble with the self made man
is that he is usually equipped with a sell
starter and forgets all about a muffler.
After a woman gets so fat that she oc
cupies two seats in a street car for the
one nickel, she isn’t a bit bashful about
kicking 'because the company doesn't
supply softer cushions.
Every time we read “Maud Muller” we
wonder why the fool judge didn't get her
telephone number and explain matters
over the phone.
Any man ran tell you that the piffling
home made headaches his wife gets can't
hold a candle to the ones he has the morn
ing after the night before.
IN HOTEL LOBBIES
Many »w Settler*
“The Marbury I.umber company has
done an important work in the upbuilding
of Alabama by bringing farmers from
the north and settling them in Autauga
county, about 27 miles this side of Mont
gomery,” said D. M. Dickson.
“Thousands and thousands of acres
that were in timber a few years ago are
now being cultivated. As fast as the
timber is cut the settlers are colonized.
Mr. Marbury, president of the company,
gives his personal attention to this colo
nization work. * He assists the new set-,
tiers financially where they need assist- i
once, and I am told that all the farmers |
who have bought land from the company
have prospered, some in a high degree.
The settlers come as a rule from the
north, where lands are very high.”
In Favor of Partial Annexation
“The majority of people with whom 1
talk favor the annexation of the northern
states of Mexico to the United States as
the final outcome of the war that seems
to he upon our hands,” said John P.
Wade, a retired business man of Chicago,
who visited the unhappy republic a few
years ago and who is now returning home
from a month's sojourn in Texas. “Presi
dent Wilson is on record as opposed to ag
gression, but so long as we are forced to
invade Mexico it would be a great mistake
not to get a slice of the country. T would
be opposed to acquiring all of Mexico,
but the northern part Is rich in minerals
ami is sparsely settled.
“We would have a hard time In
Americanizing the Mexican people as
a whole, but the two and a half
millions in the northern states are
mostly Indians and because they are com
paratively few they could not give us
much trouble.”
Length of Programme*
"Concert programmes should never con
sume more than two hours, and the rule
with symphony conductors is to end an
evening’s entertainment within an hour
and three-quarters” said an old concert
goer. “No matter how delightful the
music is the audience becomes weary
when it has to sit later than a quarter
past 10 o’clock. With grand opera more
latitude^ is allowed, but the modern way
is to cut even Wagner's music dramas.
"I understand that the oratorio, ‘Para
dise Lost,’ which is to be sung at the
festival concert on the night of May 7,
requires two hours and a half. From
all accounts it Is an uncommonly beauti
ful work, Hut Mr. RIenzi Thomas, tha di
rector, should cut it so as to bring tlm
performance within something like two
hours. If the concert begins at 8:30 it
should be over by 10:30, or at most 10:45
o'clock.”
firnM* Plot* Should He Protected
“Until the pedestrians of Birmingham
learn to be more considerate there can
be no grass plots around the edges of
the parks or along the sidewalks unless
the grass is protected,” said a citizen who
takes an interest in the ‘City Beautiful
movement.
"At a few homes in the ‘downtown’
district with only a little sward between
the building and the sidewalk the house
holder manages to keep the grass in good
condition by using posts and a chain.
The chain drops into a line of grace be
tween the posts, and while serving as a
fence does not offend the esthetic sense,
but several persons of taste who have
tried to keep grass in the spaces between
the sidewalks and the curbing have found
it impossible, because children, or grown
folks who are inconsiderate, trample on
the grass as soon as it comes up.
“General Louis V. Clark has recently
had the earth along the sidewalk at his
beautiful building—The Park 7nn—at the
corner of Park avenue and Twentieth
street, carefully prepared for a luxurious
crop of grass. Seed was sown and grass
roots were set out, so that a matted sward
would soon be forthcoming, but already
pedestrians and peanut venders have been
trespassing.
“It might be well to have signs put
up reading, ‘Please Keep Off the Grass;’
but a better way, perhaps, would be to
have little sticks driven into the ground
and strings stretched from stick to stick
serving as reminders to pedestrians. The
city does not allow the use of wire, be
cause a walker not looking just where
he or she was going or what he or she
was coming up against might trip and
be thrown down, thereby sustaining seri
ous injuries, which in turn would result
in a damage suit. But coming back to
the original suggestion, pedestrians should
be taught more consideration. Why do
not those interested in the ‘City Beautiful'
work try to educate people to keep off
the grass without being expressly told?” I
The New Cardinal*
“Interest felt in the cardinals’ college
is not confined to members of the Cath
olic church, for all persons who observe
world affairs appreciate the influence
that the college has on certain important
international problems,’’ said a layman.
“The Associated Press dispatch from
Rome In Monday's Age-Herald announc
ing that Pope Pius would hold a con
sistory May 25 was not unexpected by
those who had kept up with Vatican
news. During the past six months sev
eral tentative dates have been published,
but May 25 will not be changed except
for some grave and unforeseen reason.
“It was not expected that any ecclesias
tic of the United States would be in
the new list, as three cardinals created
at the last consistory were accredited to
this country—Cardinal Farley of New
York, Cardinal O’Connell of Boston, and
Cardinal Falconio, who was for several
years papal delegate at Washington, but
who for sometime has lived in Home.
“There are now three cardinals living
in the United States—Cardinal Gibbons,
archbishop of Baltimore, and the arch
bishops respectively of New York and
Boston. Among the new cardinals will
be the Most Rev. Louis Nazatro Begin,
archbishop of Quebec, and the Abbot
Gasquet, the head of the English Bene
dictines. Canada has had only one mem
ber of the college—Cardinal Taschereau,
who died several years ago. Archbishop
Begin will be, therefore, the second car
dinal in Canada.
“In the list of cardinals designated sev
eral are recognized as prelates of excep
tional prominence and ability, but it is
safe to say that Abbot Gasquet is the
most notable. He is famous at any rate
in the English speaking w’orld. He is
not only a great scholar in a general
way, but he is greatly distinguished in
two or three directions. As a master
of English style, for instance, he is un
surpassed. He is regarded as one of the
greatest Bible scholars who has lived in
modern times. One of his most illumi
nating essays is ’The Old English Bible,’
published in a collection of brilliant pa
pa res in 1897. The abbot is now the pres
ident of the international commission ap
pointed by Pope Plus for the revision of
the Vulgate.
“Abbot Gasquet recently visited this
country, and, although he is a monk, ht
mingled more in general society than
‘religious’ are usually permitted to do,
because of his literary activities and his
leadership in departments of learning in
which Protestant divines are especially
interested. In New York prominent citi
zens, most of them non-Catholics, ten
dered him a complimentary concert by the
Damrosch orchestra at the Waldorf-As
toria. The patronesses of the occasion
included representatives of the ’four hun
dred.’
"It was hoped by Alabamians, who had
long known of the abbot's fame, to have
the opportunity of hearing him in an
address on the Bible or some other
theme in this state, either at St. Bernard
monastery in Cullman or in one of the
churches in Birmingham, but the abbot’s
time was, doubtless, too limited for him
to come far south. Abbot Gasquet, it
is needless to say, will be a strong ac
quisition to the college of cardinals.’’
H ATRED OF THE GRI AGO
From the Kansas City Journal.
Americans should not forget, in con
sidering the present unhappy complica
tions in Mt^xioo, that throughout all the
Latin republics south of the Rio Grande
there is an abiding hatred of them. This
animosity is not always openly express
ed, especially when Americans possess
visible means of resentment. But it al
ways exists. The character of the Mex
ican is complex and strange. He is an
admixture of odd races and he is in
fluenced by many atavle characteristics.
Proportions vary greatly as the scale
descends from the pure Castilian to the
trogliod.vte Indian, and there is every
conceivable combination of mental and
physical elements in the Mexican make*
up. But there is one unchanging and
uniform quality common to all, and that
is distrust, fear and dislike of Amer
icans.
If one were to seek a leaven that might
bring homogeneity of interest and pur
pose to a majority of all those of Latin
blood, he could find nothing more po
tent than firing the powder of hatred
toward Americans. And this is the thing,
which we must take very seriously into
account at this time. Insurrection is a
chronic condition among Mexicans. That
is their somewhat strenuous method or
"playing politics." They do not take
their intranational differences nearly as
seriously as we suppose. Their political
battles are fought with rifles, it is true,
but their sentiments are highly volatile
and are subject to quick change. If,
therefore, we in America witness the
somewhat pleasing spectacle of our own
people laying aside at a moment's notice
their political differences and all getting
behind our President in a common cause,
we must consider that to a very great
extent the Mexicans will take the same
kind of action.
Already reports come from various
points in rebel territory that the Mex
icans are ready to stop fighting among
themselves and welcome an opportunity
to turn their guns on the "gringoes."
This is natural and logical. Their dispo
sition to fight must have some outlet.
Under ordinary circumstances they are
content to fight each other, but they
would thrown themselves into conflict
with a national enemy with surprising
zest. They are intensely patriotic—or
think they are. They have no real griev
ance against each other. They fight
among themselves for power, for money,
for spoils and* for the pure enjoyment of
the spectacular battle incident. Turn
this disposition against a foreign foe
hated for generations, and the Mexican
people will be a serious antagonist to
cope with.
And, finally, it should be kept In mind
that the dense ignorance of the Mexican
masses lias distorted their ideas of geog
raphy and history. Probably not one in
100 of them believes that the United
States could whip Mexico. They are
common braggarts. They have no con
ception of this country's vast resources,
its amazing development and its mili
tary and naval power. Their 'fear of
us is not based so much on our military
prowess as upon that mysterious respect
which the ignorant mind lias for com
mercial and industrial supremacy. All,
over Mexico Americans have been push
ing railroads into mountains fastnesses,
opening gigantic mines, constructing
great warehouses and conducting mar*
velous business enterprises. These thing*
constitute a permanent affront to Mex
ican pride. So let ns not assume that
castigating Huerta would not mean wax
with a united Mexico, for in all prob
ability the whole country would have
to be combated in a stubborn and costly
struggle.
WAR AND BUSINESS
From the Philadelphia Ledger.
A pet Wall street illusion is that a
war with Mexico or anybody else would
help the United States Tinanclally.
Must have munitions and provisions,
therefore factories would be stimulated
to supply such articles.
Alas! Logic and history do not in
dorse the pretty theories of our Wall
street friends. When a man's leg Is
cut off activity is stimulated to the ex
tent of a rushing ambulance, a busy
surgeon, an employed nurse, the con
sumption of absorbent cotton and other
supplies.
Mr. Hurt Man’s money stirs up all
these activities and pays for them, but
he is not richer by the operation, nor is
the community.
For the United States to create a
debt of $500,000,000 to pay for sup
plies. all of which would be wasted in
a war, Is not the way for the United
States to get prosperous.
Brokers always recall the fact that
business boomed in America during and
after the Spanish war. But the war
didn't cause that boom. It was simply
not a big enough war to prevent the
boom, which had already started.
In the early part of the civil \Var
security values were greatly depressed.
Later, when it became evident the
north would triumph, stock prices ad
vanced.
The battle of Gettysburg, for exam
ple, took only $1.75 a share off the
price of Pennsylvania railroad stock,
but then the tide had turned.
England never got anything to com
pensate it for the $900,000,000 which
the Boer war cost. Japan is now al
most bankrupt on account of its war
with Russia.
What goes Into a war is w’aste, and
waste cannot permanently be a good
thing for any people. If what Is spent
for cavalry horses bought plow horses,
the latter would create enough wealth
to pay for themselves. Not so the war
charger. He never earns a penny.
The canned food and clothing that
a soldier gets may stimulate tempo
rarily a factory, but these material*
If they went to a farm laborer, would
be made in work to pay for them
selves.
No, you can scarcely promote a war
as a lever to lift business.
t THOUGHT FOR TODAY
From the Cincinnati Enquirer.
| If people never made mistakes there
' would be no rubber Ups on lend pencils.
TROUBADOUR AND JESTER
INDOOR SPORT.
I love to have the telephone
Arouse me from sweet slumber,
And while I wait with anxious ear
These softly spoken words to hear
“Wrong number."
—Grand Rapids News.
I love to have the telephone
Whirr, till my brain is dizzy;
And as I rush to make reply,
This 1s the answer that gets by:
“Line's busy!”
—Los Angeles Express.
I love to have the telephone.
Oft in the chilly nighttime.
Ring out as though someone wrere mad
To tell me this here message sad:
“Hold-th’-line!”
—Boston Globe.
I love to use the telephone
And shout myself quite hoarse.
It nearly does just me derange
To have a voice ask. “Which exchange?”
When I mean “main,” of course.”
ARKANSAS JURISPRUDENCE.
Silas; “Did you win your suit?” ■
Jonas: “Yes, 1 won it, but my fool op
ponent took it to the circus court.
THE TREND OF THE TIMES.
Clubwoman: “How time does fly. I’vo
been so busy preparing a paper on the dif
ference between George Elliott’s “Ro
mola” and Mrs. Humphry Ward's “El
eanor” that I haven't had time to mend
the baby’s gown.”
SCOOP ’EM UP.
He: “So General Wotherspoon may suc
ceed General Wood in this Mexican war.”
She: "It won’t be much of a war If
we can whip those Mexicans with a
spoon.’’
•
IN G MINOR.
She failed to observe the poor gnat,
And down on his carcass she gsat.
Said the gnat: "Hully gee!
The world’s down on me,
I’ll stand gpat, though I’m gflat as a
groat." —Cincinnati Enquirer, f
She failed to see the poor gnat
One day as she strolled through the gzoo,
Said the beast in despair,
“J anr sure she would care
If she gknew a gnew gnu or gtwo."
—Seattle Post-Intelligencer.
*
She failed to observe the park sign
Upon the new bench made of pigne—
"Look out for fresh paint;"
And she cried "Holy saint,
I’ve ruined this new dress of migne."
>
The odor gave her tho phthisic;
A doctor prescribed some phthphysic;
When he left her bed
He solemnly said,
"Dear me, byt that woman phthis sick."
A QUESTION OF TIME.
Sonny: "Pa, were the minute men of
1776 Americans or English?"
Pa: "They were our men."
Sonny: "There must have been 60 of
them if they were hour men."
NOT A BIT.
Alfonso wants to arbitrate
'Twixt us and Mexico.
His motives may be right;
But the Spanish potentate
We would have truly know
This isn’t a bull fight.
, C. F. M.
GREAT TRIALS OF HISTORY
TRIAL OF ALICE LISLE
□ICE LISLE, an English woman of
gentle birth, was arrested, tried,
convicted and executed for trea
son against the state, and this judicial
murder has always been considered as
one of the greatest blots on English court
records. There was no evidence that she
was aware that she was harboring trai
tors when John Hicks, a dissenting minis
ter, and Dunne and Nelthrop, others of
Monmouth's supporters, applied to her
for protection.
Monmouth's rebellion occurred during
the middle of 1685. At the time Alice Lisle
was in London, but returning to her home
at Moyles Court, on July 20, she received
a message from Hicks asking her to shel
ter him and two companions. Mrs. Lisle
knew Hicks as a dissenting minister, and
at her trial she claimed that she had im
agined that a warrant was out against
him for illegal preaching or for some
other offense committed in his ministerial
capacity.
A few days later the trio arrived at
Moyles court. Their whereabouts was at
once disclosed by a spying villager t»*
Colonel Penruddock, who the next day
arrived with a body of troops and placed
Mrs. Tdsle and her guests under arrest.
The trial of Mrs. Lisle was begun on
August 27. 1685, before Judge Jeffreys at
Winchester. No evidence respecting
Hicks’ offenses was admitted, and no
proof was forthcoming that Mrs. Lisle
had any ground to suspect Hicks of dis
loyalty or that she had displayed any In
terest in the Monmouth insurrection. *
Mrs. Lisle made a telling speech in her
own defense. The jury declared them
selves reluctant to convict her, but Jef
freys overruled their scruples, and she
was found guilty. The sentence pro
nounced upon her was that she be burned
alive. Pressure was, however, applied
nnd the day of execution was set for Sep
tember 2.
Lady Lisle petitioned James II to grant
her a further reprieve of four days, and
to order the substitution of beheading for
burning. The first request was refused,
but the second was granted. Mrs. Lisle
was accordingly beheaded in the market
place of Winchester and her body was re
stored to her friends for burial. mm
Judge Jeffreys was one of the most odi
ous judges who ever administered Justice
In an English court. He had no regard f
for the law. In Alice Lisle's case, she
could not, according to the doctrine laid
down by the highest authority, be con
victed until after the conviction of the
rebels whom she had harbored. But
Judge Jeffreys disregarded this law, and, ?
she was sent to the bar before either
Hicks or Nelthrop had been tried.
It was no easy matter to obtain a ver
dict for the crown, in spite of the fact
that the witnesses prevaricated. Th«
Jury, consisting of the principal gentle
men of Hampshire, shrank from the
thought of sending a fellow creature to
the stake for conduct which seemed de
serving rather of praise than of blame.
When the trial was over and the fate of
the woman was known, this excess of
barbarity moved the pity and indignation
even of the most devoted to the crown.
The clergy of Winchester cathedral re
monstrated with the chief justice, who,
brutal as he was, was not mad enough
Lo risk a quarrel on such a subject with
a body so much respected by the lory k
party.
Not only the clergy and others high in
favor at the court, but ladies of high
rank interceded for the unfortunate pris
oner. Feversham, w'hose recent victory
had increased his influence at court, and
who. it is said, had been bribed to take)
the compassionate side, spoke in her fa
vor. Cladenron, the King's brother-in
law, pleaded her cause." But all was vain.
The utmost that coud be obtained was
that her sentence should be commuted
from burning to beheading.
On the scaffold Mrs. Lisle gave a paper
to the sheriff, denying her guilt. The at
tainder was finally reversed by a private
act of Parliament in 1689, at the request
of Mrs. Lisle’s two daughters, on the
ground that "the verdict was injuriously
extorted and procured by the menaces *
And violences and other illegal practices"
of Jeffreys.
TOMORROW—IMPEACHMENT OF WILLIAM BLOUNT
HOW TAGORE GIVES
Basanta Koomar Roy, In the Yale Re
view.
About 10 years ago Rabindranath Ta
gore's wife died, and the shock of this
bereavement drew him still nearer to
God, and so closer to action. He felt tlr
If there was a panacea for all of India's
evils, it was education—liberal education
full of freedom and love. So he left
Calcutta, went to Bolpur, and there In
memory of his father he founded, with
out a single building, but with live or
six children gathered together under the
mango trees, his model school, now the
famous "Bolpur Bruhmo Vadyalay.”
Tagore is at the head of the school.
Many Incorrigible children arc sent there.
But under the influence of love and free
dom they become ideel characters. He
loves the children, and the children love
him so much that on holidays many of
them reii.se to go home to their parents,
preferring to stay with their beloyed
"Guru" (teacher). This school is now
tha principal object of Tagore's care. He
is planning to open a department of in
dustrial education, and no doubt the No
bel prise money will be utilized fur the
fruition of this noble project.
Here he lives a life of unalloyed sim
plicity, thinking most exalted thoughts,
writing poems and plays, loving the chil
dren in the school and the birds in the
woods. Though he is so unassuming that
he often cooks his own meals in an "eco
nomic cooker,” he is always reading in
English the latest important books in
philosophy and literature.
Thus he spends his days in this quiet
spot. In constant communion with the
Hod-head and radiating calmness all
around his modern hermitage. Rich in
its spiritual wealth, resplendent in its ex
alted emotions, tlte personality of Radin
dranath Tagore is a living lyric of tha
rarest quality; and we are not at all sur
prised to see that this great genius of
the east haB at last keen welcomed In
the west with such a cliofhs of applause.
When the west discovers the east, and
the east discovers the west, humanity will
discover Itself automatically. Then the
Illumination will come to "break the
walls," and this world will be “one lumi
nous whole,” "one perfect music."
ECCENTRIC INN NAMES
From the London Chronicle.
We are losing most of our eccentric inn
names, but in Germany they are adding
to them. Berlin now boasts the ''Com
fortable Chicken," "Cold Frog,” "Btlft
Dog," "Thirsty Pica/ "Dirty Parlor,"
"Musical Cats," "Boxers' Den," and
"Lame Louse." Leipzig has "The Old
Straw Bag," Stadtohen an "Open Bung
hole,” and tljo vicinity of many a ceme
tery in tha fatherland la graced a "Last
Tear."
WHALES KILL SEA LION
From the Victoria (British Columbia)
Colonist.
Mr. R. Armstrong and Mr. Gordon
Grahame of Messrs. Armstrong Bros.,
of Kingston street, tell a very interest
ing story of a fight which they wit
nessed between two killer whales and a
sea lion off the mouth of the harbors.
The fight ended In the death of the sea *
lion.
Mr. Armstrong and Mr. Grahame
were taking a pilot, Capt. Johnson, on ^
board the outgoing Washtenaw, at
about 8:30 o'clock in the morning,
when, off the mouth of Hie harbor,
they observed a great disturbance in # j
the water. As they approached the
commotion resolved itself into a mur
derous attack by two killer whales oji |
a sea lion. The pilot was put on board,
and the launch returned to the scene
of the fight. About 9:30 o'clock the
sea lion was found floating in the
water, evidently sorely battered, but # |
still alive.
Mr. Grahame threw a noose over its
head, and the launch began to tow the
huge animal toward the shore. This
was not accomplished, however, with- jf
out considerable difficulty, as the beast
had still energy enough left to slew the
boat about in all directions. After cov
ering about a mile the noose slipped,
and they thought the lion had escaped,
but in diving under the boat it was
struck by the propeller, and this put f
the finishing touch to the wounded
beast. Its tail came out of the water
/or one instant before it sank, and
Mr. Grahame, with a good shot, again "
placed the noose around it. It was
then towed ashore to the wharf on
Kingston street.
Mr. Armstrong stated that both the *
killers would hurl themselves out of
the water at once and come down with
resounding blows from their tails on
the sea lion, which was evidently head
ing for shallow water and the shore
at Macaulay Point.
THE IRISH
From the Cincinnati Enquirer.
(Private Daniel Aloysius Haggerty, U. *
S. marines, was one of the first men
killed in the present Mexican war.)
Sure, you’ll always find the Irish where
there's flghtin’ to be done,
Be it fists, or rough-an’-tumble, or the
handlin' of a gun.
When they sound the charge, you'll al
ways find the Irish in the van, *
For there’s somethin’ in hla heart tha§
makes the Mick a flghtin' man. "
Sure, it had to be a Haggerty to be the
first to fall.
If it wasn’t for the Irish, sure we’d win
no wars at aM,
his gallant clan,
hts gallan clan,
For there's somethin' in hie veins that
makes the Mick a flghtin' man.