The Birmingham age-herald. [volume], August 18, 1914, Page 4, Image 4

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THE AGE-HERALD
E. W. BARRETT.Editor.
Entered at the Birmingham, Ala.,
postoffice as second class matter under
act of Congress March 3, 1879.
Daily and Sunday Age-Herald . fS.OO
Daily and Sunday, per month.TO
Daily and Sunday, three months. 2.00
"Weekly Age-Herald, per annum. 50
Sunday Age-Herald. 2.00
A. J. Eaton, Jr., O. E. Young and AY.
H. Overbey are the only authorized
traveling representatives of The Age
Herald in its circulation department.
No communication will be published
without its author's name. Rejected
manuscript will not be returned unless
stamps are enclosed for that purpose.
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rate of exchange. The Age-Herald will
not bo responsible for money sent
through the mails. Address,
THE AGE-HERALD,
Birmingham, Ala.
Washington bureau, 20T Hibbs build
ing.
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Covent Garden. London.
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60, inclusive, Tribune building. New
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eign advertising,
TELEPHONE
Bell (private exchange connecting nil
tlcpnrtnicnts), Main 4IMMI.
Yet yon see how the world goes—I sec
It feelingly. —King Lear.
BEGINNING THE DAY—O 'God,
give me contentment. Help me to
work hard enough to find satisfac
tion In my labor. Help me to live
sincerely enough to fear no man.
May I dig up enough In my place to
discover the gold; and climb high
enough to see the stars. May I II* c
as If permanently. In Christ’s name.
\mcn.—H. M. E. A
Old Fashioned Cooking
Now that the fashionable hotels in
this country are confronted with a
dearth of French cooks, on account of
the war in Europe,ia great niany na
tive-born Americans who have per
suaded themselves that they can’t eat
any but French dishes, may be com
pelled to resume a wholesome ac
quaintance with the sort of fare they
delighted in “back on the farm.” With
out any wish to disparage the art of
French chefs, considered by epicures
to be quite beyond disparagement,
it must not be overlooked that they
cater to jaded appetites. They special
ize in sauces and in “complicated’
dishes that sometimes have a delicious
taste and a most infernal effect on a
digestive apparatus that is not in
first rate condition to start with.
If this country were entirely de
prived of its French cooks, who have
become well nigh indispensable in the
sort of hotels that cater to the wealthy
and the elite, there would doubtless
be much wailing and literal gnashing
of teeth, but personally we find it
hard to sympathize with the person
who can’t get along on “home fare.”
All mothers are not good cooks, but
most of the old fashioned mothers
knew enough about the art to excel in
it, or capably direct it, and what the
white mothers were unable to do the
black “mammies” never failed to per
form in the south where their skill
was proverbial.
Even if all the Gallic chefs do go
home to fight and the old ones who
remain in this country are not as
skillful as some of the younger and
more modern chefs, there will be plen
ty of good cooks lef^ in the land and
so long as they confine their opera
tions to plain, wholesome food that is
eaten strictly on its own ijerits and
doesn't have to be artfully seasoned
to make it more appetizing, the na
tion as a whole will hardly come to
gastronomic grief.
Increasing Interest ii» Library
The public library in the city hall
is steadily increasing in popular in
terest. While many cities boast of
larger libraries than Birmingham, few
can compare more farvorably in the
range or value of reference books 01
in the general efficiency of service.
A considerable proportion of the
money subscribed recently for the
purchase of new books is being ex
pended in standard histories and
works on technical subjects. Works or
engineering and chemistry are in more
demand than ever and it will be en
couraging to friends and supporters
of the library to be informed that the
calls for books of a trivial character
decrease rather than increase.
The library is doing an educational
work of far reaching value. As a cen
ter of cultural activity its importance
cannot be over estimated. The library
is kept up chiefly by private subtler ip
tions. The canvass for funds made Iasi
spring met with a generous responsr
and it is believed that as the usefulness
of the institution is more widely ap
preciated voluntary donations, boti
in money and books, will be largely it
evidence.
A Beneficent Co-operation
Throughout the early part of thi
year many leaders in the busines.
world manifested deep-rooted opposi
tion to the democratic administrator
at Washington. There were not a fev
calamity howlers, and among this
class were many prominent finan
ciers.
But when President Wilson made il
plain that he was not opposed to “big
business” as such, that he desired
only legislation that would curb such
I
' monopoly as was in restraint of trade,
; and further, that he was only too glad
to confer with great bankers and rep
resentatives of great corporations, the
friction between the administration
and the business world began to di.5*
appear.
When foreign nations became en
gaged in war the business situation in
this country required the co-operation
of all interests, governmental and pri
vate, to steady it. The stre^l and
strain brought about a better under
standing and a closer co-operation be
tween business men and the government
than had existed before. Never was
there a finer national “get-together”
spirit. Men of all parties and
men of all shades of opinion have been
ready to uphold the administration,
and the administration has rot hesi
tated to invite the counsel of finan
ciers and men of affairs of recognized
ability.
The conference of bankers with
federal officials in Washington two or
three days ago proves, as President
Wilson said, that “the antagonism be
tween the government and business
is at an end.”
No one can form any idea of how
long the European war will last. It
may be over by the first of October;
it may be Christmas before the bel
ligerents are ready for peace. But no
matter how long the old world is in a
disturbed condition, President Wilson
will end his first term not only with
a harmonious party back of him, but
i he will have the cordial respect of the
captains of industry and the captains
of finance. President Monroe lived
through an era of good feeling. Hu
manly suca!' :-- ■ ” ' ’ ■ ■’ wBson will
have a similar experience. And that
he will witness a r,“— of nrosperi' -
goes without ff"1""
An Ominous Silence
The censorship imposed by the
British and French governments on all
dispatches concerning the war is the
most rigid ever known. Yesterday it
grew even more strict, and practically
nothing was permitted to trickle
through to an anxious world to indi
cate operations at the seat of war.
Only one item of real significance
was passed. This was the announce
ment that the seat of government of
Belgium had been removed from Brus
sels to Antwerp, indicating that the
Germans are continuing their turning
movement and pushing forward. Af
ter performing wonders of valor, the
Belgians are being gradually driven
back on the main line of the allies.
But great things are going on be
hind the wall of silence. The first u*
cisive battle of the war cannot be much
longer delayed. It may be only a
question of hours until the main Ger
man army comes in contact with the
line of allied troops stretched from
the River Meuse to the River Moseile.
When that is accomplished it is
probable that the men of the armies
of the Moselle and the Rhine will be
loosed and the world will tremble be
fore the greatest struggle of history,
a battle front stretching from Basle
to Lille, 266 miles, and involving mil
lions of men.
The more stringent censorship can
only be accepted as an indication of
niomgntous events. Even now the
great struggle may be on, and a
breathless world breathlessly awaits
the result.
No Loans to Belligerents
The “sinews of war” were never
more needed in Europe than now.
Every foreign nation engaging, or
about to engage, in hostilities needs
more money than is readily available
at home. Every one of the nations of
Europe has had its eye on Wall street
in the United States of America.
Certain foreign countries' in a state
of war not only needed large financial
aid, but they knew that bankers of the
United States could provide it, and so
they could. J. P. Morgan & Co. and
other great Wall street concerns not
only had millions upon millions to
loan, but they were eager to negotiate
war bonds provided the administration
at Washington did not object.
President Wilson decided promptly
that American loans should be made
only to neutral powers. His intima
tion to the New York bankers that
loans by American banks to any of
the belligerents would be against this
country's public policy settled the
matter. Mr. Morgan and others
readily acquiesced in Mr. Wilson’s
view.
European nations needing money tc
carry on the war feel sorely disap
pointed in not obtaining funds froir
America. The administration’;
“ruling” was based on principle, bul
at the same time it was felt, no doubt,
that the failure of European nations
to receive relief from New York would
tend to shorten the war. It is hard for
any country to engage in war without
ample means to pay the soldiers and
mejet expenses.
President Wilson will be applauded
by the people of this country for his
firm stand.
The Germans are giving no quarter
reads a headline. Probably one reasor
why Americans lack funds with which
to get out of Europe.
More people would succeed in this lif<
if they could come to realize that thej
have to get down in order ty 'po up.
Dolls have superseded the Pom and the
Pekingese in the favor of Parisian wom
en of fashion. Formerly it was common
to see a woman walking with a poodle
attached to her wrist, hut the new craze
for dolls has made the poodle a back
number. The fickle Fartsienne Is not
content with one doll, but must have a
collection, the larger the better. All sorts
of dolls are In evidence. There are French
dolls, German dolls. American dolls, In
dian papooses, pickaninnies, Dutch, Jap
anese and other varieties. A certain well
known actress of the French capital has
a trunkful of dolls which she takes
with her when she travels. It is said
that every country on the globe is rep
resented in this doll family. The actress
who owns the dolls is frequently seen
walking in the Bols with several of them
in her arms.
Queen Wilhelmina of Holland inspects
troops while the prince consort is engaged
in Red Cross work. It appears that the
Queen makes the prince consort a handy
man around the throne.
Speculators who Wry to take advantage
of th^ war scare to gouge consumers of
foodstuffs ought to be given a chance
to ruminate behind prison bars.
Searchlights arc playing an important
part in the European war. If the Kaiser’s
soldiers belonged to the union they
wouldn’t work after dark.
It is to be hoped that nothing serious
will happen to Professor Garner, who is
stranded abroad with two “talking” go
rillas on his hands.
And it wasn't very long ago that Mme.
Calllaux was as prominent in the news
papers as the Kaiser Is now.
If only the good died young a big por
tion of the world's population would be
housed in old people’s homes.
Madame Nordlra left tfn estate of more
than a million, which shows that her
notes were worth something.
There seems to have been a joker con
cealed in the treaties made by the pow'
ers that are now at w'ar.
It is now proven beyond all doubt that
a big army and a big navy don't mean
peace, but ultimate war.
Some Americans didn't know how to
appreciate their native land until they
got stranded in Europe.
The crafty Japs see a fine chance to
grab some territory and prove (?) their
loyalty to England.
Just as present the price of sugar Is an
exemplification of the adage that sw’eets
of life come high.
One reason why some women are good is
that they have not learned how easy it
is to be otherwise.
The Dutch are not itching for a scrap,
but if trouble comes their way they won't
be caught napping.
As yet no one has accused the dove of
peace of putting the squab in the Euro
pean squabble.
As a general rule only the elevator boy
takes the ups and downs of life with equal
thanks.
There is plenty of room In the Atlantic
to fight, and also to run.
• --—
Things go by contrast. Oftentimes a
hot-head has cold feet.
THE BELGAIN SPIRIT
From the New York Sun.
The astonishing valor of the defenders
of Liege has inspired the whole of Bel
gium with a quickened determination to
light to the last ditch to prevent a viola
tion of the rights of the Fatherland. The
people there are helping to the utmost,
opening their houses as hospitals. Many
of the large stores are filled with beds and
red crosses are painted on the doors.
The people are not excited, but are ex
tremely anxious. They eagerly buy pa
pers with bulletins telling of the progress
of the siege. Meanwhile the desperate
conflict continues. It has been wag' d by
day in brilliant sunshine and at night in
clear moonlight except w’hen a sharp
thunderstorm seemed temporarily to halt
the attackers. f
The gunners at the forts, stripped to the
waist, refused to leave their posts, how
ever, and hurriedly ate and drank their
food standing by their gun®
The higher ground around the city is
shrouded in smoke, which hangs still in
the quiet air. The corn in the fields
spread over a wide area along the frontier
Is trampled or burned and the fields are
strewn with corpses of men and horses.
Many villages have been burned or
wrecked. All the civilians who were
caught carrying arms were shot down
summarily. Dolhain escaped because the
inhabitants did not resist.
LIKE M'LllvE SAYS
From the Cincinnati Enquirer.
Most of us have little trouble follow
ing the Biblical admonition against lay
ing up treasures here on egrth.
Why is it that a man will grudge a min
ister $5 for tying the knot and yet will
gladly pay a lawyer $500 to untie It?
Lots of patriots are willing to die for
their country. But they insist upon dying
of old age.
Some men are born unlucky and others
marry for money.
When a girl has shapely ankles and <
new silk stockings she simply can’t keep I
her shoe strings tied.
One reason why a dog looks so intel
I ligent Is because he never starts to talk
and show his Ignorance.
After a man has been married long
enough he learns that the only way 10
argue with a woman Is to slam the door
and keep on going.
Nearly ^very man owns a patent cigar
lighter that won’t light.
The old-fashioned woman who used to
put everything she had In her stocking
now has a daughter who puts everything
she has on her back.
<Lots of fellows who always keep a '
corkscrew' and a beer opener on their j
key rings never have enough to purchase |
a drink.
Friend W’ife can't see my harm in gam
bling if her husband wins. But it isfl
different if he loses.
If there were any truth in the early
rising theory the milkmen would have
all the money In the world.
When a woman watches another woman
cook a meal she always goes around and
tells the neighbors that the other woman
uses too much butter.
It is funny how a woman likes to
wash dishes when she is away from
home and how she hates the job when
, she is at home.
Before marriage all they talk about is
clothes and men. After marriage all they
talk about is men and clothes.
IN HOTEL LOBBIES
HunlnfNN Improvement
“Business conditions seem to be set
tling down to normal,” said Frank
Clark of Knoxville, of the firm of Clark
Sr Jones. “Trade is rather quiet in New
York city, but we are expecting an im
provement in the near future.
“Hero in Birmingham I ^lnd business
quite active. The more I see of this city
the better I like it. Its growth will
continue at a rapid rate, and no city
in the south has such a great future."
It ran riling Concert Orcheatras
“I read with interest tfte editorial in
The Age-Herald entitled ‘Music and
Music,’” said a prominent local musi
cian.
"1 was surprised to learn that At
lanta’s concert orchestra, which was re
garded as quite an institution three or
four years ago, was deteriorating and
that it would probably be disbanded.
Atlanta has made a brilliant success of
Its annual grand opera festival: but It
Beems that music in general Is no long
?r appreciated there.
“Many cities not much larger than
Atlanta or Birmingham have good con
cert orchestras, and I believe we could
organize an orchestra here this fall
that would be a credit to this communi
ty. Of course, we cduld not expect to
start off with a full symphony orches
tra; but for a beginning we might have
an orchestra of 25 or 30 men which
'ould render acceptably all the stand
ard overtures and not a few of the
symphonic poems and lighter sympho
nies. It seems that Atlanta had to send
away for a conductor. There are at
least three musicians here of orchestral
experience who are recognized as au
thoritative conductors, that is, con
ductors who can interpret in master
Btyle the best music.”
Shelby County's Good Hoads
“Shelby county is about to complete
75 miles of good roads,” said Judge A.
R. Longshore, judge of probate of that
county.
“We voted bontis to the amount of
>275,000 and the results so far fully
justify the outlay. We are advertising
for bids for a section of road running
from Vandiver, in Shelby county, to the
Tefferson county line, near Leeds. With
this built and a small portion of the
Vandiver-to-Columbiana road soon to
l>e completed, we will have a good road
if, say 50 miles, all in all, from Co
lumbiana to Birmingham. Then, you
knowr, the Columbiana-to-Wilton road
uosses the Birmingham-to-Montgom
iry road in Shelby county at Calera.
The distance from Columbiana by this
route IS 44 miles. Thus it will be seen
3ne may travel in a complete circle, so
o speak, from Columbiana via Leeds to
Birmingham and home by way of Ca
era, a distance of 04 miles.
“Newell Brothers did the contract
work on all of our roads thus far
juilt, and wo have not figured out
he exact cost per mile, but we will
nave money enough to complete the
roads now planned from our bond- is
sue.”
Monarchies anti Republics
“I will not venture even a guess
is to how long the terrible war will
last, but it will be no surprise to me
f Germany becomes a republic as a
result of the bloody conflict,” said a
professional man.
“If Germany can defeat the powers
that are combined against the fath
erland tjt«*n the empire might siirvive
for a time, but I can but think that
many persons now living will see a
great German republic.
“One by one the nations of the earth
that have been ruled under old nion
archial forms jvill set up republics.
In all probability before the first half
of this century is run Italy, Austria,
Russia, Belgium and Holland as well
as Germany will join the procession
of republics. The British monarchy will
in my opinion be the last to topple.
Royalty costs England millions of dol
lars a year—about $5,000,000, I believe
—but the Britishers have a liking for
such a monarchical government as
theirs, a government really more dem
ocratic than our republic of the Uni
ted States. And the very fact that the
King has only nominal authority and
tligt the people through their elected
leaders rule is why I say ‘Mis Britannic
Majesty’ will be a familiar term 100
years or more hence."
Congressional Elections
“Six months ago it looked as if the
democrats would have a small majority,
if any, in the next House of Representa
tives, but I believe now there will be a
decisive democratic victory,” said A. T.
Spalding of 'Chicago.
“I have never taken a particularly ac
tive part in politics, but it is plain to see
that the democratic administration is
gaining steadily in popularity. During
tlie lust two or three weeks I have been
through at least a dozen different con
gressional districts. Eight of them were
democratic two years ago, and they will
go democratic again in November. There
is no question but that President Wilson
is making more than gooi^”
Cotton Situation
It seems to be generally understood
that the cotton crop will be financed so
as to assure reasonably good prices to
the farmer. Alabama has a bumper crop,
and there will be as much money in cir
culation in this state during the holidays
as there was last year, which was a year
of great prosperity in the south. One of
the best informed and most conservative
brokerage houses in New York has just
issued a circular on the cotton situation
which says in part: The first problem is
to take care of about 300,000 bales during
the current month, 500,000 bales or there
abouts during September, and at least
1.500.000 bales in the month of October.
This, however, should not be a particu
larly difficult proposition provided our
manufacturers awake quickly to their ex
traordinary opportunities. The stocks of
cotton goods in this country are moder
ate and no imports are likely for the
present. Home mills, therefore, have a
clear field as far as domestic consump
tion is concerned, and in addition the
markets of*Latin-America and the far
east are open to them without competition
for the first time.
"It is true that there are but 31,000,000
active spindles in the United States, but
their capacity could easily be augmented
50 per cent and there is little question that
if converters w'ould extend their opera
tions to the limit profitable markets would
be found for such Increased output in
Central and South America alone. The
benefits resulting would be lasting. Once
opened up to our goods thees new mar
kets would be secured, in a measure at
least, for all time. Domestic spindles con
sume on an average about 600,000 bales of
cotton a month. If then the monthly con
sumption were increased 50 per cent to
750.000 bales, the early season's arrivals
would not be a weight upon the market
*
and such an adjustment of deinund to
supply would stabilize prices at a level
Insuring a fair profit to the producer. The
American manufacturer has never been
slow to take advantage of changed con
ditions to Increase his output in new
fields and It is reasonable to suppose that
awake as he must be to the present situa
tion no stone will be left unturned lit an
cltort to grasp the present golden oppor
tunity for Increasing our textile trade
permanently In other countries. Granting
then that such will be the case, there
seems good reason to believe, especially
In view of the probably successful efforts
of out government and the banks to ad
just credits and finances to the disturbed
conditions, that further price demoraliza
tion in cotton will be avoided and a bet- j
ter condition of affairs wjll exist just as
soon as the market is relieved of weak
accounts, which are still to be settled."
WAR ECHOES
Army and Navy Journal: In the sea
fights which the warshlpg of Great Brit
ain and France will engage in against
Germany the various engines of war will
receive a supreme test.
Claims and controversies which have
engaged the attention of naval experts
for many years regarding ships, guns,
armor, etc., may at last be settled in
lhe greatest naval fight in all history.
There will be the question of the big
battleship against the smaller, the ar
mored cruiser, or battle cruiser, against
the unarmored cruiser, and oil fuel
against coal. The Important question of
fleet communication by day and night
and the increased use of wireless will
be among the important elements of the
struggle. Then the battle airships, mine
laying and scouting airships, seaplanes
and aeroplanes will be given ample op
portunity of demonstrating their value,
but as we have stated many times pre
viously we believe their principal value
will be for observation. The anti-air
craft guns abroad ship and the aircraft
guns will probably come into play and
the various auxiliary vessels and turbine
engines will receive the most severe test.
The torpedo boat destroyer class of ves
sels particularly, and also the submarines,
are expected to play a far more impor
tant part in tills war than they did in
the Russo-Japanese war. In the British
navy no less than 20 new destroyers were
commissioned last year, against 15 the
previous year. Most of these vessel!
have a length of 200 feet, and most of
them have a speed of over 29.5 knots. In
the design of British destroyers special
regard is given tw the attainment of high
speed on heavy seas, and thus in com
parison with vessels of the same class
in foreign navies the true test would not
be fair weather steaming at the rate
possible with a North sea gale blowing.
One or two of these vessels attained a
sea speed of nearly 30 knots. In the
case of submarine, nine new vessels were
commissioned last year. These latter are
of various designs and range up to ves
sels of considerable size. The details are
kept secret.
During 1913 six large destroyers were
added to the French navy, all over 30
knots. Twenty submarines were laid down
since 1910, most of which are in commis
sion. In maneuvers the work of the
French submarines has been classed as
very successful, and the extended opera
tions gave a wide experience to officers
and men.
The 12 German destroyers of 1912-13
have been completed. The designed speed
of all the recent boats is 3?.5 knot£ The
boats have been kept very actively at
work. The submarine boats completed
number about 30. During 1913 24 subma
rines were kept in commission.
The six Austrian destroyers of 800 tons
have been completed and have steamed
on trial from 32.5 to 33.5 knots. Four
teen submarines are in the list, of which
six are of the 230 to 300 tons type.
The Russian destroyer Novik, of 1200
tons, made a speed of 37.3. Several sub
marines have been launched in the Black
sea. Great progress has been made in
the air service for both the army and
navy. The government- programme in
cluded 330 aeroplanes.
Paris Special New York Times: An of
ficial communication Issued today says
that since the beginning of the war the
German people have been systematically
deceived by false news circulated by a
large German agency, with the object of
making Germans believe their troops had
gained great advantages. It adds that
there has been an absolute suppression
of all news disadvantageous to the Ger
mans.
The French government, it is stated, has
decided to issue a daily news bulletin for
distribution among the French troops.
This will be composed of reports of field
operations and of important events in
France, the object being to create a
strong link between the French soldiers
in the field and their relatives.
The decision to is^pe this bulletin was
reached as a result of correspondence be
tween Adolphe Messimy, French minister
of war, and Premier Viviani. M. Messimy
writes:
“Our armies cover a front of more than
250 miles, from the North sea to Switzer
land. Among the several millions of men
each ofTicer and each soldier is lost. He
is given over to the Impressions of the
moment and of the place where he is, and
is without news of the others and without
news of the war.
“I believe it to be necessary to send to
all those fighting under these conditions
the comfort of a dally newspaper. 1
would have the soldiers constantly meas
ure the importance of their Individual ef
fort in the national task and by this
thought create among them a generous
emulation.
“I wish the soldiers to learn with what
care the nation surrounds the parents,
the wives, and the children they have left
behind them while they consecrate tnem-1
selves to their great task—a task glorious
because their sacrifices are the price of
the independence our country and of
the grandeur of France In the triumph of
right and liberty."
Premier Viviani responded, approving
of the suggestion with much feeling.
London dispatch to New York Sun:
The Times’ Brussels correspondent tele
graphs an interview with Victor H.
Duras, American vice consul at Liege,
who was an eyewitness of the first two
days’ attack on «hat city.
Mr. Duras is quoted as saying tha^ the
German army underestimated the fight
ing qualities of the Belgians and paid a
terrible penalty for their own daring. The
Belgians, he says, allowed the Germans
to pass the forts and advance toward the
city itself, and then attacked them in the
rear, while Belgian Infantry faced them.
He estimates the German casualties as
from five to ten times greater than the
losses of the Belgians.
“Speaking as a neutral." Mr. Duras is
quoted as saying, “it seems to be a part
of the new railtary tactics of the German
ADRIFT WITH THE TIMES
SHAKESPEARE CONDENSED.
They are making over Shakespeare into
vaudeville tabloids.—News Note.
Th’ immortal bard In vodevil—
We surely are surprised;
And though we read
Tis so decreed.
We can’t believe our eyes.
“Macbeth” in 20 minutes,
And what a lovely chance,
“Hamlet” to do
its laughs arp few—
With a little song and dance.
JUST RIGHT.
“I see by the papers that large areas of
land in Holland ha\% been flooded to a
3epth of three feet av a precautionary
measure.”
“That s a good idea. Too deep to march
through and not deep enough for battle
ships.” 1
NEW ORDER TO HIM.
“Say, Bilkins. what’s a Uhlan?”
“Search me. I’m familiar with Eagles,
Owls, Elks, Moose and a few others, but
I never heard of a lodge of Uhlans.”
TWO EXCERPTIONS.
“I*a, what kinds of languages were
spoken at the tower of Babel?”
"All kinds, son, except possibly baseball
and Esperanto.”
HARD TO WIN.
“You don't seem to be making much
progress with Miss Benders.”
“That depends on what you mean by
■progress.’ I dare say I’ve tangoed at
least a hundred miles with her, but I don’t
seem to be any nearer her heart than I
was a month ago.”
DRIVEN TO DRINK.
A hard-working fellow named Guff
Said liquor was terrible stuff,
But when he got married
And found himself harried,
He simply could not get enough.
LIGHT STUFF.
“Ah. Glad fa! Cultivating your mind, I
see.”
"No, indeed, father. I’m merely reading
hammock literature.”
ARTISTS ALL.
"The dentist is an artist," said
The funny Mr. Heath;
"The pencil doesn't earn him bread,
But I’ve seen him draw teeth. ]
—Cincinnati Enquirer.
"The barber is an artist, too,"
Quoth waggish Mr. Lutz; i
"For every story he tells you
He illustrates with tuts."
—Columbia State
AmandH is an artist, too.
Although she says she ain't;
She wouldn't know just what to do
I Without her rouge and paint.
—Youngstown Telegram.
Hamfat thinks he's an artist when
He's playing to the gallery;
And though applauded now and then,
He cannot draw his salary.
THREE KINDS.
"I wonder what woald be the price of
an omelette in Paris now?"
"That would depend on whether you or
dered it made of 'new-laid' eggs, fresh;
eggs or just eggs."
THE REASON.
"I wonder tvhv,"
Said William Pry,
"Men will not stick to water?" (
"That's plain to see,"
Said Missus P., > ,
"They can't drink more 'n thcj!>
oughter.”
IDLE OPINIONS.
The average young man seldom works
as hard as he plays.
Many a youth who "foots it featly"
through the dance couldn't foot a bill to
save his life.
I Some women remark, "Say, what you
please,” and then talk so fast they don’lj^
give you a chance to say anything. \
There is too much slang used by chil
dren nowadays. Recently a preacher told
a little girl that she ought to go to Sun
day school and she answered, “Ish ka
bibble." I
Thcrg is no human failing more com
mon than vanity and none there Is less
excuse for. p. "c.
GREAT TRIALS OF HISTORY
TRIAL OF THELLUSSON WILL CASE
NO WILL# case during the last cen
tury created as much excitement
as did that of the disposition of
lis property by Peter Thellusson, a Lon-,
Ion merchant. This case was carried
ilong in the London courts for two de
cades. At the present time the fortune
3f the merchant would be considered very
nconsiderable, but the disposition of an
estate in 18i»9 of $.1,000,000 was something
very unusual in England.
Thellusson had three sons, all of whom
were married. It was his desire in life
that they should found their own for
tune as he had done. He took the very
best legal advice when he decided to
make his will. He left his sons a few
trifling legacies and the remainder he
placed in the hands of trustees. It w'as
to accumulate until every man, woman
and child of his offspring should also
be defunct. No one of the children or
grandchildren should ever be richer for
Peter's wealth.
When the will wras opened, at the death
the father, all the relatives were sad
ly disappointed. They were destined to
live the life of Tantalus and to see this
great pagoda-tree growing up before
them, yet never Yo pluck one unit of ils
fruit. The terms of the will enjoined
that when the last survivor of all the
nine descendants should yield up his
breath, then the charm was to end. Then
the great mountain of accumulated w’ealth
was to be divided into three portions, and
one-third was to be given to each of the
“oldest male lineal descendant’’ of the
three sons.
He ended his will by saying that he
hoped the legislature would not waiter it.
Of course, the first thing that followed
was a chancery suit of the fattest bulk.
The common sense view' would have been
to set aside the will as the product of a
diseased mind. But Lords Loughborough,
Alvanley and Eldon were led by their
love of art to admire the skill of the
maker of the will.
The litigation was first carried to the
House of Lords, where it was confirmed.
Then the legislature took it up and de
cided that the devising property for the
purpose of accumulation should be re
strained In general to 21 years after the
death of the testator. Then the English j§j
courts of chancery took the case In hand ,9
and for no years, even after all the I
children and grandchildren were dead, 9
they continued to haggle over the will [||
and draw from the accumulated sum to 9
pay them for their time. 9
The last survivor of the nine lives ef- MB
fected by the will died in February, 1S56. I
Then arrangements' were made to carry B
out the final part of the will—its division 9
into three parts. Another stumbling block 9
wms then in the way, for there were two 9
who were oldest in the point of lineage H
and two who were oldest in point of per- ^9
sonal age.
Old Fetor's object was to make the^H
heap very large at its division, but in- I
stead tlie court of chancery had so clipped 9
and palliarded the rich merchant’s oak 9
that when it came to the final division B
it was a very little larger than originally. 9
In fact the purse-proud old man had dls- H
inherited his own children only to fatten 9
a generation of lawyers, and instead of 9
his name being associated with the foun- 8
datlon of a house of fabulous wealth, was B
only known in connection with an abor- B
tive scheme of vulgar vanity. Jj
In consequence of the failure of male 9
lineal descendants on the part of one B
of the family when the partition arrived B
the trust property became divisible Into 9
two lots only. In the suit ‘The Hon. Ar- JS1
tliur Thellusson vs. I,ord Itendlesham utulfH
others,'’ the question was who was the
“eldest male lineal descendant1’ of Peter
Isaac.
The case was first heard before the S
master of the rolls, who decided In favor B
of T,ord Rendelsham. Then it was ap- 9
pealed before thi House of Fords, happily jfl
for the litigants the court of supreme and I
final Jurisdiction. The learned lords dc- B
llvered their several opinions. On the 111
9th of June, 1859, Just 62 yeaHs after tho 9
cruel and Insane old man i.ad bequeathed I
his legacy of dispute and litigation to I
his children and his children's children. 9
the Hotlse of Fords put an end to his 9
power of inflicting further mischief by -■
pronouncing their final Judgment. Finally c K
the decree of the lower court was sus-11
talned. and laird Rendelsliam was given B
preference over Hon. Arthur Thellusson I
as to the rightful person io a share of th# I
merchant's fortune. ■
TOMRROW—TRIAL OF CAPTAIN DYSON
army to fight as much as possible in tne
night time. Comparatively little fighting
occurred at Uege during the day.
"The scheme of the Belgian defense
seemed to be not to make any serious
resistance to the attack until the Ger
man troops were actually past the forts.
Then, when they were close up to the
town, and their several bodies trying to
effect a juncture, fire was opened upon
them from the forts behind, and. from
rifles and machine gunB in front, so they
were caught in a trap and retreat was
cut off. There was nothing for them to
do but to be shot down or surrender.
"The amount of suffering on both sides,
owing to an inability to deal promptly
with the wounded, was very great, but
especially to the Germans, whose casual
ties were from five to ten times as num
erous as those among the Belgians.
"The Germans paid a terrible penalty
for the boldness of their scheme of at
tack, which, from a military point of
view, could be justified only by a convic
tion on the part of the German officers
that they would meet with only the fee
blest resistance. The mistake they made
was in underrating the fighting qualities
of the peaceful Belgians."
New York Times: Shortly after the
opening of hostilities the German Kai
ser. following the precedent established
by William I, reinstituted the famous;
Order of the Iron Cross.
King Frederick William III of Prus
fna founded the order on March 10, 1813,
as a reward for services rendered to the
Fatherland in the Napoleonic wars. The
plainness of the Iron insignia was In
tended to remind Us wearers of the
hard times that had brought it into be
ing. It was a small iron Maltese Cross
inlaid with a narrow silver band just
inside the beveled' edge. The only other
marks upon it were three oak leaves
In the center, the royal Initials F. W.
surmounted by a small crown, and the
date 1813. As Is customary in the case
of royal orders, there were two classes
and a grand cross, the latter twice the
regular slse. In 1841 a permanent en*
dowment was added, paying fixed an
nual sums to the wearers of the decor
ation.
On July 10, 1870, the day that France
again declared war on Prussia, the or
der was rtevived by King William I on
the same conditions as originally in
stituted. At that time the three oak
leaves were dropped, and the letter W,
the crown, and the date 1870 were sub
stituted for the original marks, but the
three leaves were restored by air order
of the imperial council In 1895. Thor
decoration as revised in 1870 has bee™
boptowed on 48,574 German warriors of^
alTclasses, including those coming from
German states outside of Prussia.
The Grand Cross is conferred only on ^
commanding officers who have won a
decisive battle followed by the forced
retirement of an enemy, for the capture
of an important fort, or for successfully
defending a fort against the enemy's
capture. In addition to the soldiers who
have won the cross for individual acts
of distinguished valor it has been
granted to all the members of regi
ments that have performed especially
meritorious service. There is no decora- .
tion for a German military man that)
carries with it greater glory than the .
Iron Cross, and it is significant that the
thousands of veterans who possess this
priceless decoration have always been
looked upon with the most profound
respect by the entire German public. i
A POET’S PROPHECY j
By Alfred Tennyson. j'
For 1 dipt into the future, far as human
eye could sec, j
Saw. the. vlslofi of the world, and all the
'wonder that would be;
Saw the heavens fill with commerce, ar
gosies of magic sails, !
Pilots of the purple twilight, dropping
down with costly bales;
Heard the heavens fill with shouting, and
there rain'd a ghastly dew
From the nations' airy navies grappling
in the central blue; 49*
^*ar along the world-wide whisper 6f yjjC
south wind rushing warm,
With the standards «*t the peoplap plung
ing through the thunderstorm; ‘
Till the war drum throbb'd no longer,
and the battle flags were furl'd j!
In the Parliament of Man, the Feder*
tion .of the World!