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The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, May 15, 1915, Image 4

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THE AGE-HERALD
E. W. BAKHKTT..
Entered at the Birmingham, Ala.,
jrostoffice as second class matter un
der act of Congress March S, 18,3.
Daily and Sunday Age-Herald.... 88. t.0
Dally and Sunday, per month..
Daily and Sunday, three months.. 200
Weekly Age-Herald, per annum.. .60
Sunday Age-Herald . * uu
^ U Griffis, O. E. Young am.
W. D. Brumbeloe are the only author
ized traveling representatives of Tie
Age-Herald in Its circulation depart
ment.
Ho communication will be published
without Its author's name. Rejected
manuscript will not be returned un
less stamps are enclosed for that pur
pose. ..
Remittances can be made at current
rate of exchange. The Age-Herald will
not be responsible for money sent
through the mails. Address.
THE AGE-HERALD,
Birmingham, Ala.
Washington bureau, 207 Hlbbs build
lug.
European bureau, 6 Henrietta street,
Covent Garden, London.
Eastern business office. Rooms 48 t0
60. Inclusive. Tribune building, New
York city; western business ottlce,
Tribune building, Chicago. The fa. C.
Beckwith Special Agency, agents 101
elffn advertising. __
TELEPHONE
Bell (private exchange connecting all
departments) Slain 4!>00.
They hnve wars. nnd liny for tlicir
presumption. Henry ' !•
BEGINNING THE ms—Help me
In my hualnesa loitnj. O l.oril. Give
me firmness without unklndneav.
resoiircefiilneaa without .llahoneaty.
ambition without nvarleo, eiirncat
neaa without anxiety. Stay I acek
eontentment rather titan great gain
Slay I do all after counsel with my
senior pnrtner, God. In I hriat a nninr.
Amen.—H. SI. E,
Honor Thy Mother
Last Sunday you wore a carnation.
Perhaps you sat in church and heard
gome preacher discuss the piety of
filial devotion. If away from home,
you wrote a letter to your mother.
Very likely you telegraphed an or
der for flowers. If not away from
home, you sent a florial offering to
your mother, spent a part of the day
■with her and said tender things to her
and about her.
This all came about somewhat auto
matically, for last Sunday was Moth
er's Day, and machine-like you fel
into the procession and followed tin
custom of the day. All of which ii
good—good so far as it goes—bu
don’t you think it would he a wholi
lot better if you made every one ol
the 365 days in the year a Mother's
Day?
If mother is good enough to deservi
„ pne day of nation-wide tribute, isn’
*he good enough to merit the sanu
consideration day after day, week aft
er week, month after month ?
In short, wouldn’t it be more con
sistent if we were to distribute oui
sunshine and our flowers over each
day of the year instead of bunchins
them all in one day?
Doesn't the present custom savor a
bit of the feast or famine extreme?
Clearly the principle of Mother’s
Day is worthy of unqualified indorse
ment. But the man, whether younj;
or old, who feels that he can, withir
the narrow limit of one day out ol
every 365, give to his mother all the
tribute due her, is making a misera
bly poor calculation.
The wearing of the carnation, the
listening to a sermon, the writing of ;
letter and saying of soft, sweet thing;
to mother on Mother’s Day is a mock
ery unless it typifies the 365-days-a
year spirit of the man.
Mother is entitled to every day o
the year so long as man lives.
Turkish Women
A remarkable change lias bee
wrought among Turkish women in th
last ten years. Raymond Swing, news
paper correspondent, writing fron
Constantinople, describes an inter
,-view he had with three young Turkisl
. women, whose ideals, advantages an.
attainments compare farvorably witl
the most advanced type of colleg
women in America. The interview it
self would have been an impossibilit;
a decade ago, but such progress is no\
being made by Turkish women to war
greater freedom and greater enlight
ISthat many hoary tradition
sn cast aside. The veil is n
niversally worn and the harer
out. In fact, the Turks wer
monogamistic and while ther
harems in the interior, on
he rule, not the exception.
Aa a matter of fact, women c
Turkey are more favored by the la'
*ln some respects than American ■:
English women. Suprising as it ma
' seem to western minds unfamilia
with Turkey, they occupy a rather «
•lied position and it is possible to e:
lie a man for speaking disrespectful]
l a woman on the street. The Turl
>iih husband, it is true, can divorce h
Wife *t will, without assigning an
MM&, and she can only obtain a sej
•ration by taking her case to cou
" and pleading her own cause, but mar
| grounds not recognized in the Unit<
States courts will free her from a
unhappy marriage. And though hi
1 husband may be able to cast her of
; ha cannot keep her property. Hi
dowry must be repaid. Marriage does
not imply a property partnership.
It it predicted by students of
Turkey that the women of that coun
try are destined to play an important
part in its future, a future character
ized by freedom of thought and eco
nomic advancement. However, despite
the fact that Turkish women are
eager to be on practically an equal
footing with Turkish men and they are
taking university training in large
numbers, they are not yet ready for
suffrage. Demanding the ballot and
entering pursuits that are essentially
masculine may come later. Just now
it is the ambition of Turkish women
to acquire knowledge and spread it
among their sisters.
The President's Note to Germany
Germany’s answer to the United
States will be awaited anxiously, but
whether or not the Berlin government
makes friendly reply and agrees to
acquiesce in all the terms of Presi
dent Wilson’s clearly and vigorously
phrased note cabled through the state
department to Ambassador Gerard
Thursday night and delivered by him
to .the German foreign office yester
day, this document will become his
toric.
The President has written a number
of diplomatic notes distinguished by
poise and a deep sense of justice as
well as rare literary skill, but this
latest protest, called forth by the loss
of more than 100 American lives in
the sinking of the Lusitania, is the
most masterful of all. It is couched
in the usual terms of diplomatic
courtesy, but in the discussion of vital
details it is clear and earnest and the
touches of fine irony in it could not he
excelled.
The note makes it plain that there
must be no evasion on the part of Ihc
German government. The German
foreign office is called upon to dis
avow the acts of which the United
States complains; to make reparation
and to take immediate steps “to pre
vent a recurrence of anything so oh
viously subversive of the principle.1
of warfare” as the violation of neu
tral rights on the high seas. And ir
conclusion the President says tha1
“the imperial German government wil!
not expect the government of the
United States to omit any word oi
i any act necessary to the performance
, of its sacred duty of maintaining the
rights of the United States and it;
1 citizens and of safeguarding theii
free exercise and enjoyment.”
The German admiralty will bf
. loath to reduce its submarine activi
ties, but if the Kaiser and his ad
: visers take counsel of Immunity oi
. wisdom they will not cause the Wash
ington government to sever diplo
matic relations with Berlin. Presidenl
Wilson has acted with remarkablt
self restraint, but he could say no less
than was said in his grave and im
pressive note.
With scarcely an exception the
newspapers of this country applauc
the President’s course. The press, re
gardless of party, pledge loyal sup
port to the administration in th<
event of a breach between the Unitec
j States and Germany. And, of course
all patriotic Americans will be as one
man in standing by the President.
There is reason to hope, however
1 that no matter what be the temper oi
■ the German people the present crisis
1 may be composed satisfactorily to thb
country through diplomatic channels
Impounding Dams in Alabama
f Dr. Edgar B. Kay of Tuscalonss
yesterday delivered an address in Cin
cinnati before the American Water
works association on the subject “Im
l pounded Waters of Alabama in Re
, lation to Public Health.”
Dr. Kay, after giving an interesting
summary of the location of variou;
impounding dams in this state, under
takes to show that in most cases suet
1 dams not only do not form lakes in
1 jurious to public health, but actually
i improve conditions from a healtl
» standpoint. He maintains, for in
stance, that ail the water in the Loci
12 lake on the Coosa is renewed ever;
t five days. He cities other dams ti
I show where low, swampy, overflow
mosquito-breeding lands have beei
entirely covered by slackwater fron
5 dams and such regions rendered mor
habitable and the value of adjacen
lands actually increased.
His address is especially interestin;
e as a summary of what has so far bee
done toward the construction of im
^ pounding dams in the state.
v It used to appear that strong cleJrr
r were made for a particular make of see
y Ing machine or cottage organ, but th(
r waa before competition in the autonu
_ bile business became so lively.
- A professor in the University of Roche
y tei has declined to teach German ar
more. Tut, tut! He needs “aeadem
s calm."
y The pestiferous person Is at large agat
i- who Insists on telling everybody whi
■t Georgy Washington would do to the Ge
y mans.
d After perusing page after page of wi
n news it is restful to reach the sportii
:r page. ■'
---^
f, Speaking of the peach crop, the Jp'
ir brides all look like wino-rs. i
V i
The equipment of a Roman eoldler was
simplicity Itself compared to the burden
that a modern fighter has to carry, whose
outfit consists of a magazine, rifle, bay
onet, scablmrd, rifle cartridge belt and
fasteners, rifle cartridge belt suspenders,
a first aid packet, canteen, canteen strap,
blanket, roll straps, haversack, meat can
used as a frying pan, cup. knife, fork,
spoon, shelter tent, tent pins, one rubber
blanket, one pair of shoes, one repair kit,
one overcoat and one entrenching tool.
The weight of this load varies from 40 to
100 pounds. In addition the soldier must
wear thick clothing in winter, which adds
considerably to his burden. In going into
battle most of this equipment is discarded,
with little chance of its being recovered.
Seasoned men care little for a knapsack,
and it is no longer in universal use. The
Japanese soldier carries a long sack in
which he can put a great variety of ar
ticles. During the Russo-Japanese, war the
equipment of a Japanese soldier included
among other things a hemp hammock, an
aluminum water bottle, a supply of rice
in a grass box and a copper camp kettle
with which he was able to boil water in a
pale of wind. Although it is customary for
troops going into battle to discard every
thing that is not nedeed for fighting, they
must carry extra rounds of cartridges.
A Karis^ man. having been jilted by
ills betrothed, after he had made a long
trip to marry-her, bringing with him a
clergyman, started proceedings to recover
damages to the extent of the expense in
cident to the trip. Whereupon, according
to press reports, the girl reconsidered and
married him. Anyway, he can be sure
of getting an economical wife.
A torpedo, from all reports, is a pretty
sight when ploughing through the water,
hut the direction it takes has a great
deal to do with the admiration it in
spires. ___
Tis true that the Lusitania was an
English ship, flying the English flag, but
the Gulf light was not. Mr. Bryan points
out the difference with rare acumen.
Charles Frohman's body lay neglected
and uncoffined until urgent attention was
called to it. Verily, these are the days
of hysteria and scattered wits.
—.-..—••<— — —
The churches of Waco. Tex., are estab
lishing rest rooms in the basements of
the churches. A wave of long sermons
must have struck Waco.
Why not set up statues of famous mov
ing picture comedians In various parts of
the country? They are already being im
mortalized as figurines.
rr Dr. Dernburg is expelled from this
country, something ought to be done with
ex-Congressman Bartholdi, who Is a con
spicuous trouble maker.
The modern soldier looks queer wearing
his "gas helmet.” but picturesqueness hat
been altogether banished from moderr
warfare.
It is unfortunate fur Jess Willard thal
he Is champion at a time when few peo
ple are in the mood to applaud a "pug."
It. is only right and proper that tht
hanks should keep open on Mothers' Day,
Father might slip mother a check.
That hunted look schoolboys and girls
are wearing is due to the coming or
deal of final examinations.
Many a man who would like to he Pres
ident is glad that he is not sitting ir
the White House non-.
The ship of state careened slightly wher
the Germans sank the Lusitania, but soor
righted itself.
The opening of summer parks has giver
a great boost to the peanut and popcort
business.
One thing Is certain. The colonel ha:
lost the German vote in this country t<
a man.
While keeping one eye on Europe, don'
forget to swat the fly and oil the mo
squito.
HIS AILMENT
Tom P. Morgan, in Judge.
"Glad to see you, old boy! Glad to se
you!" chortled the confidence man. "Hot
are you, anyhow?"
"All run down!" grimly replied Sami
storm Smith, the well known cattle halo
of Rampage, Okla., who Is temporarll
' In our midst. "I don't take no interest i
I life any more. I don't care to match do]
lars with strange gents who smell of por
, ljrker; I don't feel able to buy the cit
hall on the instalment plan, paying
hundred dollars down; 1 haven't any air
bition to best wire tappers at their ow
1 game; I don't feel any desire to gf
something for nothing; I haln't got suff
; dent strength left to tote a gold brie
. If somebody would give it to me, and
, don't feel the slightest inclination to g<
acquainted with total strangers who com
> snouting in without an invitation. Look
l sorter like rain, off to the south ard, don
1 it?"___
5 I,LIKE MM.IKK SAYS
t From the Cincinnati Enquirer.
Another cheerful liar is the lad wh
tells vou that he gives his wife so muo
r a week out of his pay, and that si
never askB him what he does with the rei
1 of it.
The sort of man who is so close thf
he saves match stubs for kindling is ui
ually the same fellow who keeps the bunt
men supplied with loose change.
8 There was a time when a man coul
- get a position on the strength of tl
, fact that he had a diploma. But nows
days most of the employers seem to t
from Missouri.
After a girl has been engaged thr<
or four times she begins to look as slioi
l- worn as a widow.
y Prayer is a good thing. But it woul
c help some if we would put as muc
energy Into fighting temptation as we A
Into praying for forgiveness after it hi
happened.
When eight' or nine women are talkln
l* at the top of their voices at the sam
r- time they are not fighting. They are hat
Ing a good time.
The merchant who doesn't advertise I
ir .the same fellow who never has what yo
want in stock because he never had an
* )demand for it.
I Before he gets her he figures that tw
( can live as cheaply as one. But afte
he gets her he discovers that he forgot t
add iu the cost of hep complexion.
IN HOTEL LOBBIES
Southern Bunlnenn Condition!*
"Business conditions In the south, all
the way from the Potomac to the gulf
are Improving rapidly," said I* K
Shorter of New York, who is a partner
In a well known mercantile concern
"I have visited a half dozen south
rrn cities this month, and I am in
touch with the business throughout
the south. It is not too much to say
that in a majority of the southern
states conditions have become almost
normal again.
"Birmingham looks 100 per cent bet
ter than it did when I was here last
November."
Alabama Products Increase
"Crop diversification is now the watch
word in rural Alabama.” said V. W.
Wood.
"I keep in close touch with farmers
in all parts of the state* and with ship
pers of both Alabama and Tennessee
end since the inauguration of the diversi
fication campaign here there has been
a noticeable increase in both the quan
tity and variety of farm products of
fered for shipment to this city. The
farmer
vided attention to the cultivation of cot
ton and is beginning, to concentrate on
products which can be utilized at home,
such as pork, peas, corn, potatoes and
honey.
"While more home cured bacon and
ham is now being received by my con
cern from Tennessee than from Alabama,
the dealers of this state are furnishing a
considerable proportion of the meats,
poultry, eggs and honey consumed here,
and the quality of the Alabama products
runs high. It was only last week that
we received a 2000-pound shipment of the
highest grade of honey from south Ala
bama and shortly afterward a solid car
load of ‘speckled’ peas.
"Consignments of poultry and eggs are
arriving daily from all parts of the state,
and I believe the enterprising farmer is
now fast approaching a state of inde
pendence by virtue of thrift and indus
try. Birmingham certainly offers an ex
cellent market for high grade produce
of all kinds, and the consumer here
shows great discrimination and apprecia
tion in regard to securing the best that
the state affords.’’
Planning gout hern Tours
"Several of the symphony orchestras
are beginning to make plans for southern
tours during the coming sea8on,”*~said a
member of the musical set.
"1 had a letter a few days ago from
Wendell Heighten, manager of the Min
neapolis orchestra, in which he said he
was trying to work lip a sufficient num- !
her of southern engagements for Febru
ary to bring the entire orchestra of 85 men
to this section. He expressed the hope
that he could secure a Birmingham book
ing. This orchestra, as all musical folks
know, is in the foremost rank. It was
here three years ago, but it had then
only the usual number of men—about 50—
carried on long tours. But in February
the orchestra, if it appears here, will have
the same number of players that it carried
to New York and Boston; in other words,
the full orchestra. ,
‘‘The Ht. Louis orchestra and the Cincin
nati orchestra purpose making midwinter
tours in the south. If we have Damrosch
next year it will be late in May when he
starts on his transcontinental tour.
"There is a great deal more interest in
symphony music in the ‘provinces' now
than was the case a few* years ago. and
all first class organizations draw large
audiences, even In towns of 20,000 popula
tion and less.”
Trip to Lock 17
"The trip made by the Birmingham
Chamber of Commerce delegation to Lock
17 on the Warrior river was indeed a
pleasant affair,” remarked W. M. Cosby
shortly after his return.
"The party enjoyed a day's outing, and
the time spent was certainly not wasted.
Lock 17 within itself is well worth close
inspection of people who feel an interest
in Alabama development, but when the
further fact that this gigantic work is
only a link in the chain which connects
the Birmingham district with the gulf is
considered, the visitor may well pause and
consider the part that the now completed
project will play in the future progress
of this section and Its relation to Indus
trial activities.”
The Drama League
1 “The Drama League of America is
now well organized and its activities
will result in a larger patronage for
: the better class of plays,” said Carl
H. Milan, director of the public library,
and one of the organizers of the Bir
mingham branch of the league. “We
have about 200 members here ami we
hope to bring the number up to 600
» or 700 before the end of the year. The
r Atlanta branch, organized before ours,
has about 600 members.
“Tiie drama league attempts no cen
sorship of plays. It only endeavors
1 by organized and systematic effort to
* create a wider interest in plays that
i rre distinctly wholesome and of real
artistic merit.
^ "Every one who appreciates the edu
cational value of the stage should join
,r the league.’’
Opening of Warrior An Epoch
The opening of the Warrior from Cor
I dova to connect with the deeper waters
* leading to the Gulf of Mexico is an epoch
- in Alabama's progressive life glorious
* to contemplate,” said Dr. R. F. Love
T lady, president of the board of revenue,
t who returned from Thursday's exer
p rises filled with enthusiasm.
s "It is now up to the people of not
t Birmingham alone, but of Jefferson coun
ty from Warrior to Locust Fork, to
unite hi a concerted, well ordered plan
to utilize, practically and profitably, this
new artery of commerce with which na
0 ture endowed us, and which the federal
II government made feasible by liberal ap
6
t propriations.
"I do hope all the people of all classes
t may stand united for the best plan thal
i- may devised, after careful study ol
o the question, to give Birmingham th€
fullest measure of benefit that will fol
d low cheaper freight rates. It means great
e things for our industries; it promises a
" fairer field for our merchants' jobbers
e particularly in competitive business, anO
lastly, it will be of material benefit 1c
e every citizen. We must not let any ques
tion of a selfish nature handicap th<
great opportunities now ours. Any mat
h ters of a purely local character, such a
0 the precise route of a standard road to
s vehicles to the rive*, Is overshadowe<
by the greater one tf a complete sys
g tem of transportation from Blrminghan
e and Bessemer, through to waiting ship
“ at Mobile.
"The prospect of a fine location fo
s health and pleasure resorts for all classe
* of our citizens upon the’f banks of Lak
’ Bankhead with its inviting scenery give
us additional ca'UM*' for gratulations o
r what we apv'comlng into by the com pi <
3 tion of ar great undertaking by the fac
eral government"
/
GOSSIP-IN LONDON
From the Philadelphia Evening Tele
graph.
The local territorial contingent was on!
its way to active service, and the suburb— j
especially the girl portion—had turned out j
to weep. Then it was that one 'bright!
lad sang out. “Cheer up. girl, they can’t
kill us all. Some of us are bound to come
back to tell you the story.” Was it stoic
ism or cynicism.
London is suffering increased food
prices during the war. In Russia things
are otherwise, for food cannot be export
ed now, and is, therefore, much cheap
er. A Russian writes from Archangel
that eggs can be bought at Is 3d per
100, while the best meat and fresh salmon
are never more than 9d or 7d per pound.
Lucky Russian housewives!
French chefs who have joined the |olors
in France, and the German and Austrian
men cooks who are no longer holding such
positions, are to be replaced in London
restaurants by women.
Classes are being started at the North
ern Polytechnic at Holloway, where wom
en cooks will be trained.
The students will deal with the menus
of different restaurants, from a very
cheap meal to the business man’s half
a crown lunch.
Crossland avenue, Hull, claims the rec
ord for the number of men who have
joined the services, taking into account
the number of houses.
There are 18 houses in this working
class street. In three there are no avail
able men, the occupants being widows,
and in another one man was rejected.
The remaining 14 houses have supplied
14 men for the army, and one w'ho is
mine-sweeping.
This is a story which all Paris is telling
—or hearing. The men. after a strenuous
day in the rain 'and the mud. had eaten
their evening meal and fallen asleep in
their shelter. Presently a voice came from
the entrance, “Moi, Boche!” No one took
any notice. Again the voice was heard:
"Me, German!" Thinking it was some
sort of new w’heeze, a sleepy voice replied:
"Shut up and let us go to sleep.” But
the stranger insisted: ”Moi, Boche!’* He
was greeted with a chorus of hearty im
precations, and remained silent. In the
morning, w'hen the French soldiers aw’okc,
they found a German deserter beside
them. He had arrived at the shelter to
give himself up the night before, but no
one would listen to him. So he lay down
where he was and decided to wait till his
hosts were in a better temper.
ALABAMA PRESS
Oneonta Southern Democrat: The far
mer is the real producer of wealth in this
section of country and the only way for
any of us to have real and permanent
prosperity is to see that the farmer gets
a square deal. When the farmer prospers
everybody prospers.
Moundsville News: “Know' thyself,” and
you probably add one more to your list erf
undesirable acquaintances.
Decaturs Daily: Who can doubt the
consistency of the British people, now
that they are showing’ their disapproval
of the cruelty of the Kaiser by mobbing
the noncombatant German population of
the “Tight Little Isle.”
Albertville Banner: Any time you be
come displeased with your name just
hunt up a spoiling page of a newspaper
and take a look at the name of some of
those baseball players.
Scottsboro Bf-ogressive Age: Germany's
latest industrial stunt is that of convert
ing all the English trawlers into "sub
marines.”
Union Springs Herald: The sinking of
the Lusitania may not be the only reason
for the drop in the cotton market. Plant
ing time is about over with and a drop
was due anyway.
Piedmont Journal: Human nature is
the instinct that imcpls a man to be so
scrupulously accurate when the error is
in his own favor.
Tuskegee News: The various bank
statements being published throughout
Alabama show that our state Is very rap
idly recovering from the tremendous de
pression that a few’ months ago left upon
us.
WAR ECHOES
Louisville Courier-Journal; The point
to lie remembered in considering German's
announced modification of her submarine
programme is that the main issue as be
tween Germany and civilization is not al
tered one whit. The torpedoing of un
armed merchant vessels—nf whatever na
tionality— without warning, will continue
to convict the German admiralty of bar
barism; her admission of responsibility
for damage to neutral shipping does not
mitigate that indictment. What the Ger
man note amounts to Is merely a recession
from the original announcement that Ger
many would not be responsible for harm
befalling neutral vessels within her "war
zone." This Is something very different
from a guarantee that such harm will not
befall; it is even further removed from
any assurance that neutrals sailing on
British unarmed merchant ships are safe.
At for attacks on innocent neutral ves
sels, these, says the note, lie outside the
“Intention" of the German admiralty.
That settles nothing at all. To claim an
accident Is an easy thing to do. Germany's
willingness to make reparation may cleat
the situation somewhat between hersell
and the individual owners of the neutra
vessels attacked; but the material cast
between the government of Germany anc
the neutral governments Is barely altered
It Is to be noted that the note Is so word
ed that it doea not declare a change li
policy save In the particular of repara
tion; it merely reasserts what the Ger
man Intentions have been and are.
PLANT, IN HATE, KILLED MAN
From the Philadelphia Presa.
Blue rockets show fear and the deadl;
, nightshade Is full of hatred. Both of thes
. are plants, but that does not prevent ther
, from declaring merciless war on all ani
. mal life. The blue rocket perfume carrie
I one of the deadliest of poisons. One-six
teenth of a grain shot from its poison pis
, til has proved fatal to a man.
, "Give this plant the semi-muscular sy«
tem possessed by the carnivorous plant
r and It would be more dangerous than th
s cholera." said Prof. Henry G. "Waite
, head of the plant research bureau
s Langhorne.
it The professor, who maintains t
- plants have memories and are capabh
. love, believes also that there are pi aj
which exercise all the emoUoaa of en
ADRIFT WITH THE TIMES ■
OUTLAWED.
I do not like the submarine.
It has a sneaking way
And when It coma upon the scene
Its purpose Is to slay.
Like any monster of the deep.
It steals upon its prey
And innocents are put to sleep
Until the Judgment day.
CONSTANT REMINDERS.
"We never know when we are going to
fall.” said the. near philosopher.
"That’s true,” answered the harassed
person. "What troubles me moat is the
fact that there are so many critics about
It is almost impossible to lull oneself into
a sense of security.”
A DIVERSION.
”1 had a delightful experience this
morning." said Gasserby.
"Tell me about it." said Dorfling.
"Two old gentlemen of my acquain
tance forgot the war long enough to have
an argument about a disputed point in
Shakespeare."
REALLY QUITE ARDUOUS.
"Tlllbury seems to have no trouble in
winning the favor of the fair sex."
“No trouble? Are you aware that he
spends hours every day practicing the
latest dance steps?”
A SOFT-HEARTED PARENT.
"I don’t spank my children. I consider
that cruel and inhuman."
“But how do you manage them?"
"When they disobey me I shut them up
In a dark room for a day or two and feed
t-hem on bread and water."
A CATASTROPHE.
A poet on a foreland stood
Intent to frame a sonnet;
The wind that day was rather rude W
And soon blew off Ida bonnet. B
Forthwith the bard In anger swore <|
And fulminated roundly.
Which blighted, blooms along the shore 10
And shocked the fish profoundly. 3|
THE MUSTY SORT.
"Tilton airs his views freely."
"Well, they need airing."
A WASTED PLEA.
Tour honor, this man accuses me of
trying to pick his pocket, but I was only
trying^ to put a card in his pocket adver
tising a pressing club.”
“The gentleman says he found no card
in his pocket."
"It must have dropped out.”
"Have you another card?
"No, your honor. That was the last one
I had and the reason why I bungled so
was because I was in a great hurry to
finish up and go home.
"Ahem! You would make a good war
correspondent." said the Judge. "Ninety
days."
NO TELLING. j
The boasted "law of nations" J
Lies buried In the sea
And soon, perchance, on planet Mars
Is where I'll want to he.
A COOLING PROCESS. j
These parlous times it is a good plan
to keep one's feelings in cold storage as
much as possible and not throw one's hat
Into the ring unless compelled to do so.
\
MIDNIGHT MOVIES
From the New York World.
□EY gave a matinee performance
of "Alice in Wonderland” a few
days ago at 11 in the morning, the
Idea being to attract the children who
have, to be home and in bed early. Very
soon New York Is going to have a moving
picture house where the performance will
hegin at midnight, the idea being to at
tract the crowd that doesn't know tvhat to
do with Itself during the long watches of
the night.
The Saturday morning matinee is pred
icated on the fact that with the girls home
from school to help around, It is pos
sible to get the breakfast dishes out of
the nay, the beds made and the carpet
sweeper pushed over the rugs, and still
have time to got out of the kimono and
Into the uniform and away by 10:30 o'clock.
Besides, if a woman is galted to tango
she can sandwich In a before-noon mati
nee between ordering the Sunday dinner
and the first number on the p. m. dance
programme, which will help keep her mind
occupied.
Tlie dog watch movies, or the 10-eent
Pullman, as they are called, will fill an
other field. It will be at the Garrick.
There's a large and steadily growing
number of New Yorkers who are afflict
ed with Insomnia only at night They
have to find something 10 uo to take
the place of tossing restlessly on their
couches. Then there are the train crews
on the night runs into New York, who
have to go out on the several 5:20s, and
have some dark hours on their hands, so
to speak.
“The 10-cent Pullman,” said Walter Ros- j
enberg, vice president of the motion pic
ture organization, who is to inaugurate
the experiment, “is filling a long-felt want
In Chicago. If New York is as wide awake
as Chicago it can sit up and be enter
tained until 5 O'clock in the morning.
With many people sleeping at night is so
much wasted time. New York works in
shifts. The off time for recreation of
some of New York's workers is after the *
clock strikes 12. What chance have those
people to play golf or tennis, or visit the ^
museum or the aquarium? None. They
have to sit around and' wait for the dawn.
Why shouldn’t they sit in at a three
reel film?
“When the clock strikes 12 and the
New York substitute for a hush lias fal
len or been pushed o’er the city, the wel
come sign will be displayed at the door
and all will be ready.
“There is nothing to prevent a person
stealing a few minu.es’ sleep between 4
reels, but special policemen will be on
the orchestra beat to prevent anything else
being stolen. At the first call for break
fast in the dnng cari the house will be
closed to all except the cleaner.
“My plan is to keep the movies moving |
continuously from 9 in the morning until I
5 the next day. With films your actors
never get tired. And think how a man
can entertain his wife and children when
he goes home for breakfast after a night
at the pictures. The 10-cent Pullman is
bound to be popular.”
BAILEY AND THE CAB
From tile Pittsburg Dispftteh.
i HE most recent innovation in a pub
lic conveyance is the much-dis
cussed jitney which has been put
to use in all the large cities ot the coun
try, and in a great measure is replacing
the taxicab, another vehicle let for hire,
but which has been in less connon use
on account of the license attached and the
exclusiveness provided.
Almost since the introduetlon of the car
riage there has been a gradual evolu
tion in such public conveyance, the inven
tion of the motor car taking the place of
the hackney carriage and hansome cab
for so many years in use.
Both England and France lay claim to
having been the country in which convey
ances for the public were first Vised. Eng
land is undoubtedly entitled to the credit
when in 1626 Captain Baily, a retired sea
captain ot Ingenious mind, established the
hackney carriage in London. The ear
liest reference to his project that has
been discovered is an account of the en
terprise as told by one Gerrard in a
letter to Lord Stratford, which bears the
date of April 1, 1634. In this letter tile
writer states:
“I cannot omit to mention any new thing
that comes up amongst us, though never
so trivial. Here is one Captain Baily; he
hath been a sea captain; but now lives on
the land about this city, where he tries
experiments. He hath erected, according
to his ability, some four hackney coaches,
put his men in livery and appointed them
to stand at Maypole, in the Strand, giving
them instructions at what rates to carry
men into several ports of the town, where
all day they may be had.
"Other hackney men seeing this way.
they flocked to the same place and per
formed their journeys at the same rate
So that sometimes there are 20 of them
together, which disperse up and down,
and they and others are to be had every
where, as watermen are t%> be had at the
waterside. Everybody Is much pleased
with it. for whereas \efore coaches could
not be had but at great rates, now a
man may have one much cheaper."
At first the number of these cabs was
limited in London to 20, but within 30
years their convenience became so to be
recognised that the number was increased
, to a*. In the time of Charles II a procla
mation was issijpd that the excessive
nimber of hackney carriages (then about
40, e), was /ound to be a common nuis
an.le. "by reason of their rude and dis
r ordtrly standing and passing to and fro
s In iJbd about our cities and suburbs, the
i streets and highways being thereof pes
- ter, (and much impassible, the pavement
s broki^Lip and the common pa-’aees ob
- si
with the English. There the moving spirit
was a certain Nicholas Sauvage, who, liv
ing at the sign of St. Place in the Rue
3t. Martin, gave the name of his dwelling i
to the modern French fiacre, or cab.
In its origin this was a sort of hooded gig,
and allowed but a single passenger, as
the driver occupied one end of the only
seat. Gradually it became known as the
“cabriolet de place,” while the woM
“fiacre” was transferred to four-wheel
ers.
This French style of carriage finally
crossed the English channel, and the cab- }
rioler came into general use in England
with the abbreviated name "cab.” This
was in 1820, and 14 years later a Birming
ham manufacturer named Hansom pat
ented the “hansom cab,” which Lord
Beaconsfield styled “the gondola of Lon- *
don.” Hansom’s patent safety cab origin- *
ally consisted of a square body, the two t
w’heels being seven and one-half feet in
diameter, the same height as the vehicle.
This same cab, but slightly changed by
making the wheels smaller, was and is
still in use in all countries, but has been
gradually replaced by the taxicab In this
coiyitry as well as by the jitney. In Lon
don the four-wheelers have generally been
termed “Clarances,” deriving the nlote
name after the popular Duke of Clar
ence.
RINGLING AS A GUEST
From the New York Journal of Com
merce.
John Ringling, of Ringling Bros, left
the Barnum & Bailey circus over In Phila
delphia Sunday and came over to New
York to be the guest of honor at a dinner
given by the Friars at the Hotel Aitor.
Mr. Ringling did not come alone, however.
He brought with him a number of his cir
cus freaks and circus acts, which were
sbiown and duly appreciated at the din
ner.
It was one of the most novel dinners the
Friars ever have given. The reception
room, adjoining the banquet ball, was
turned into a side show', with a canvas
ceiling and saw'dust on the floor. Along
one side a platform had been built and
on this wrere exhibited seven or eight
freaks. At one end of the curio hall was
a long counter, where circus lemonade and
other things were served.
I When the guests were seated Mr. Ring
ling was beside Friar Abbot George M.
Cohan, and others at the guest table w’eie
Borough President Marks, Sam H. Harris,
George C. Tyler, Sam Scribner, Nat Good
win, Raymond Hitchcock and Daniel
Frohman.
* -long the speakers were, Alfred Rips* ,
"vVWolf Hopper, William Lacka/0
uond Hitchcock.
IX A MINOR KEY I
nas Hardy.
enjoy the earth no less
e the all enacting Might
,hioned forth its loveliness
jther aims than my delight.
s some day toward paradise
all Its blest—if such there be
lift glad afar off eyeB,
agh U ooatains so placo foe
/ . - * ■ -

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