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THE AGEHERALD K. W. BARRETT.^dltut Entered at the Blrinintfhiim, A1h., jr^st office as eecond class matter un der tct of Congress March 3. Daily and Sunday Atfe-lierald . .. .MAO Dally and Sunday, per month.... TO Daily and Sunday, three month*.. 2«>u Weekly Age-Herald, per annum.. .o9 Sunday ARe-Herald . 2,u0 u. D. Uriffla. U. E. Voung auu W. D. Bruxnbeloe are the only author ized traveling representative* of The Age-Heiald In it* circulation depart ment. __ No communication will be published without Its author# name. Rejected manuscript will not be returned un less stamps are enclosed lor that pui pose. _ Remittances can be made at current late of exchange. The Age-Herald will Hot be responsible lor money sent through the mall#. Address. THE AGE-HERALD. Birmingham, Ala. Washington bureau, 107 Hlbb. buil'i lug, European bureau, 6 Henrietta street. Covent Garden, London. Eastern business office. Hooms 4H 80, Inclusive. Tribune building. «'w York city; western business otrice. Tribune building. Chicago. The s. e Beckwith Special Agency, agents for eign advertlelng. __ TELEPHOSIB Bell {private exchange connecting ">• department. > Mala 4900. Call forth your nelors by the scroll. Master. nprend ynuraelvra. —Maeh A fin About Nothing. BEGINNING THE DAY—l ord, it aevnia ttant Tbon ha.t pot me In tills Place and given me this partlenlnr work to do. Grant me In stay until I henr another eommund. Mny I ciiltl vnte the place until It shall yield goldl may I strive at the work until It shall soar nnd sing. For < hrlat a sake. Amen-H. M. K. On Short Acquaintance Every little cloudlet hides a sun beam all its own. The American woman has accepted the fact that the European war has cut off dyestuff, and has taken up somber colors, made them fashionable and pretended to like them. Now she is looking forward to the close of hostilities with the hope, not altogether unselfish, that there will result a vast immigration of servant girls to this country. Vision of the neat, weii trained Eng lish maid, serving a dainty breakfast, dance before her eyes. Relief from the vexing servant problem is a tantal izing possibility. “There will be vast numbers of un married girls who must find work,” said a club woman recently, “the num ber of spinsters will necessarily be in creased, owing to the hundreds of thousands of men slain in the war Undoubtedly many of these women will rome to this country to take up domestic service.” To the interested bystander the question presents itself, suppose they take a notion to marry after reach ing this country? This recalls the ex perience of a southern woman, who not long ago employed an English housemaid, just come to America. A couple of weeks later the maid proudly announced she was going to Iqave the next week-end, and that she was en gaged to marry an American. “But,” suggested her mistress, “can't you wait a while to enable me to secure another maid? Ask him tc wait another week at least.” “I should like to oblige you,” thi maid returned, “but you see, I do noi feel well enough acquainted to as! him to do that.” It may be unkind to dash feminim hope of domestic emancipation thui cruelly, but the fact remains tha American men have a keen apprecia tion of good cooking, and are, gener ally speaking, big enough to detec genuine worth even though it wear the cap and apron of domestic ser ▼ics. It may even be true that the lonel; ranchman, as he kneads his own bis cuit and turns his sizzling bacon in i little shack of his own building, ma; look forward to the invasion of rosi cheeked lassies from over the sea— for whom, after the hardships of war the isolation of lumber or mining camp would hold no terrors. However that may be, America wil he found holding out a welcominj hand to the oppressed women of th< old countries. In the Presence of Danger It is the unknown and untried dan ger that fills with dismay the mind of men. A danger often encountered and successfully evaded, loses muc! " of its power to inspire fear. Ironworkers on great skyscrapers for instance, take their lives in thei hands daily, as they swing at grea heights, with the wind tugging awaj threatening momentarily to wres them from their insecure hold. From the European war zone hav come many stories of indifference t danger on the part of soldiers wh have for months lived in the tranche under almost daily fire of shot an shell. Perhaps none of these anecdote illustrate more aptly the sang-froid c the soldier than the following, whic came a few days ago from a Britis correspondent: “An English soldier had just cooke B tin of prepared food over a brazie I* the bottom of a trench, when y■ It * ! large shell burst just in front of him, j scattering mud, water and stones in every direction. A lump of mud land ed with a splash in the midst of the carefully prepared dinner, whereupon the soldier, without turning his head or taking any notice of the shell, re marked: “ ‘I don’t mind fighting for Belgium, but I'm hanged if I want to eat it!’ ” Possibly the next shell would seal i his doom, but that soldier was wise in j not anticipating trouble. After all, the majority of people worry most about things which never happen. ============= Three Commissioners Enough “Shall the number of commissioners of the city of Birmingham be in creased from three to five?” That is a question which the com mission has resolved to submit to the qualified voters at a referendum elec tion to be held June 28. If a com mission of three cannot administer the business of the city in a business like way then a larger body could not. In some cities the general manager plan has been tried and has proved highly successful. Dayton. O., is one of the cities that finds great satisfac tion in the general manager plan. Since the adoption of that plan Day ton has come to be recognized far and wide as a model municipality in every respect; and it is an interesting fact that the man who fills the position of general manager was for several years a citizen of Birmingham and one of the most popular men who ever lived here—H. M. Waite. Birmingham may aome day have the one-man form of municipal adminis tration but a commission of three, as we have it today, is, it is believed, satisfactory to a large majority of the thoughtful people of the city. The ideal form of city government would be that without any politics in it. And when the old aldermanic form was voted out and the commis sion form received a great majority of the votes in the referendum elec tion a few years ago, the motive of many citizens in advocating the change was to get the city govern ment as far removed from politics as possible. The commissioners repre sent no party and the elections are nonpartisan. But despite the non partisan character of the commission, petty politics has been more or less in evidence. If with a commission of three men there has been too much politics, should the number be in creased to five Birmingham would have practically as much city politics as it had in the aldermanic days. The measure now pending in the legislature providing for an increase from three to five members is a politi cal measure. Of course, candidates for the office of commissioner would like to see the change made; but the public would derive no benefit what ever from it. Let’s hold to what we have for the present. The referendum ordered for June 28 is extra legal and it will not be binding, therefore, on the members of the legislature, but if a majority vote against increasing the number to five the Jefferson county delega tion would govern itself accordingly. Birth of Famous Poems In commenting on the great and lasting popularity frequently enjoyed by the sort of poems usually called “fugitive,” the Philadelphia Inquirer republishes the familiar story of the i origin of “Curfew Shall Not Ring To night.” Although this poem has been read and recited countless times, it continues to exert a strong appeal to : the imagination and the fact that it i has recently been staged for moving ■ pictures shows that it is destined to keep on delighting the masses for ’ many years to come. The Inquirer ■ thinks it the most famous poem ever i written by a schoolgirl of 16, and the ■ assumption is doubtless justified, since the literary production of the average schoolgirl or schoolboy of 16 , would not be acceptable to the most : complacent country editor. “Curfew Shall Not Ring Tonight" 1 was first published in a western news : paper, the modest author being re > warded by nothing more than a note of thanks. Newspapers all over the country copied the poem. It became popular in England and was trans ■ lated into German. Since its first ap i pearance the youthful school orator , and the finished actor have helped tc i keep its fame alive. Despite the im probable theme of the poem, its ro , mantic story has been the basis for r plays and has been reproduced ir t every conceivable form of art. Al • though the authorship has been dis t puted, Mrs. Rose Hartwick Thorpe ol Litchfield, Conn., is now universally e recognized as the author. Mrs o Thorpe brought out a book of verse 0 a year or two ago, but for the mos 3 part they were rather inferior. d It is interesting to note that the s famous “Shandon Bells,” by “Fathe: f Prout,” unquestionably one of th< h most beautiful poems in the language h was written by Francis Mahony, i London newspaper Bohemian, whos d life and conduct were anything bu r clerical. By disposition morose am 1 unsocial, he passed his days friendles and alone. He died in Paris in 1866. Although the tomb of the Mahony family is close by the Shahdon steeple, the name of the poet who immortal ized the spot does not appear on the family tablet, as he had been dis owned. Mine sweeping is a dangeruus and • highly necessary feature of modern war fare. Vessels performing this service work in pairs, at the constant risk <f be ing blown to pieces. A strong cable U stretched from one ship to the other. triangular weight, known as a “kite keeps the cable down in the water while it is dragged across the mine field. The cable is used to break the mooring rope which holds the mine anchored at a depth of about IS feet. When a min" is located the cable vibrates, instead of sagging, and the huge sphere is slowly raised to the surface, with its 600 pounds of explosive material. A waiting torpedo boat is warned by a blast of a siren whistle that a mine has been discovered. '1 he versel hastens to within a short distance of tLo mine and explodes it by a well directed shell. A mine sometimes explodes when it is caught in the dragging cable, thus exposing the vessels on either side t > great danger. Most of the British mine sweepers are North sea fishermen who have been accustomed all their lives to perils on the sea. They perform their hazardous tasks with cheerfulness and courage, although while a trawler i* maneuvering its crpw never know at wnat moment they will strike a mine and be in stantly destroyed. A moving picture drama based on the Frank case has been suppressed in New York and Chicago. The country has heard enough about this case, withouc the services of the moving picture camera being enlisted. An alarm has been invented to tell house holders when rain comes in through open windows at night. A person who sleeps by an open window gets the same infor mation by waking up wet. Marconi has invented a way to se> through a stone wall. Some way to go through a stone wall without damaging oneself or the wall would be helpful to amateur motorists. Killian Russell warns young w< men against trying to be “good fellows, and makes the warning doubly effective uy saying that such "good fellowship’’ ruins the complexion. Book publishers are trying to devise ways for inducing people to read more. They might try publishing better books at a more mod .ate price. A correspondent lys conditions in Mex ico are deplorable. However, it is much easier sometimes to describe a situation than to suggest a remedy. Rostand has flayed the Germans In a lengthy poem to the. American flag. Some critics hold that Germany Is the “char tlclere” among nations. ■——— .,i . ■ Boss Barnes will now have an oppnr tunity in retirement to chew the hitter cud of defeat. He should have known better than to tackle Teddy. Italy felt that she was compelled to go to war. A nation voluntarily going tri war in these days of cryptic diplomacy would be a novelty. The man whn gesticulates with both hands while driving a motor car is a po tential candidate for the hospital o- the morgue. After dispatching his note to German; . the President played golf. After do'ng one s duty a little recreation comes not amiss. The call for 18,000 harvest hands come, from Oklahoma. After this, how can the great state of Kansas afford to remain silent? The Turks are giving a good accouni of themselves In the present war. In fact they speak extremely well of themselve^ Dr. Dernburg must be given credit o; one achievement. When he did shut up he shut up tight. The socialists, whether French, Germai or Italian, rally round the flag when wa Is declared. LIKE M’l.l'KE SAYS From the Cincinnati Enquirer. The reason why a fat woman knows tha she la getting thinner Is because every one else can see that she is getting fat ter. The old-fashioned girl who used to he lieve that It was sinful to paint th' cheeks now has a daughter who has t< use a dime's worth of cold cream to ge the enamel on her face soft enough si sh« can peel It off before she goeB t' bed. \ Most of the sympathy you get In lif Is about aa sincere as Is the sad lool on the face of the undertaker who is con ducting a 1900 funeral. We are all willing to give Rockefeller' and Carnegie's money to the poor. Bu we get highly Indignant when some in dividual hints that we might donate a lit tie of our own coin. If you could convince men that all worn en are alike you could close up most o the court*. I The woman who paints herself up Ilk a side ahow banner In order to attrac attention usually attracts the same kin of attention aa doss a side show banner. Give two men in beers apiece and little space at the end of a bar and the will hold a cabinet meeting and tell th European power* where to get off. The emergency that you have prepare for Is the one that never happens. An honest working girl's skirt ma look as though she had slept In It fo a year and her waist may be soiled. Bu as long as she knows that her nose ian' shiny she Is prepared to face the world. Once In a while you will run across little, dried up. 106-pound husband Fh , wants a whole lot of credit because h does not act Ilk* a brute and beat u ; hla husky 246-pound wife. Never make yourself so much at horn that your hosts will wlBh you were. ! The reason a princess knows that th . face powder she uses Is Invisible Is b< cause a fellow has to-go Into a saloon an ■ borrow a whisk broom to get the flour ol his coat after he has spent a few houi ’ calling on her. I If your knocker wasn't afraid of yo , he wouldn't waste his time knocking yoi I When a woman tells her husband thi •he has something she wants to talk l him about she usually mean* that st want* to talk to him about something «t I hasn’t got .1 ■ _ ' f IN HOTEL LOF 31; — Euthiinln*m At Rle’ 'The people of Rlchmom full of enthusiasm In antic Confederate reunion to be held tnere 1. 2 and 3.'* said B. T. Shelton of Wash ington, D. C. "I was In Richmond Tuesday of last week—Just two weeks before the reunion's opening date—and I found everybody talk ing about the approaching event. Rich mond is noted as a convention city. Some people have an idea that Atlanta leads in this respect, but not bo. Richmond has more and larger hotels thnn any other city in the south, and it has an audi torium larger than Atlanta s. Richmond is always ready to raise money for con vention purposes and during the past five years its convention crowds have aggre gated, I am told, about 25 per cent more than Atlanta's. "No large gathering that meets in the whilom Confederate capital ever arouses quite so much enthusiasm as the reunion of the old vets." Imprenned With Hlrminghum An eminent consulting engineer of Chicago, who was recently in this city, in a letter to a gentleman who had shown him courtesies, says: “I write to ray I much appreciated the ride in the automobile through the residential dis trict of Birmingham. I was astounded at its development and situation. it reminded me more of some of the lo calities in Europe than anything i have seen.” The Park Concert* “1 find that the idea of having a tag day for the benefit of the open air music fund, which was set forth in the columns of The Age-Herald, la very popular; It takes well indeed." said a member of the summer "can't-get away club.” "Those of us Who enjoyed Memoli's fine concerts last year and the year before—and thousands of men and women, to say nothing of children, lis tened to the artistic programmes— would regard it as a very serious re flection upon Birmingham were Memoli and his band missing this Rummer for want of financial support. “Memoli has a concert band of which any city might be proud. There are only two hands in the entire south, I un derstand, that are in the class with his. "I believe that by having a musical tag day |1500 or more would be raised. It would be the first time tlie people of small means who attend the park con certs had an opportunity of contribut ing to the fund. Let’s have the tag day.” Camp De Solo "There is c^Ptainly a good time in store for the fellows who join th* crowd that will go to Camp De goto at Mentone,” said Frank Rideout. “The encampment will be under the auspices of the Young Men's Christian as sociation, arfi on June 10, the date set for departure, everything will be in readi ness for a warm reception for the Bir mingham bum h. Tents will have been erected and the camp put in order. The Birmingham association holds this en campment each year, and for the past four summers l have had the pleasure of being among the number who took the outing. Camp De Soto is located on his toric Lookout mountain, about 50 miles from Chattanooga, on the Alabama Great Southern, 100 miles from Birmingham, on Moon lake and De Soto river. The scenery in the neighborhood is grand, and the falls on the river are most beautiful. "Our camp will be well equipped for the occasion. The association will furnish a sufficient number of good army tents to accommodate all who register, also ten nis nets, baseballs, bats and perhaps brats and canoes. Tennis grounds and baseball diamonds are located near by. The expense incurred by those who take this jaunt into the mountains of northed Alabama will be very light, and every one will probably return in excellent con dition physically. Those who are to ac* company us o nthe trip are now register ing at the central association, and It il expected that from 75 to 100 young men will depart from this city on June 10.” Handling Supplies of Egg* “Eggs are now exceedingly plentiful in Birmingham, and shipments arc ar riving daily from all parts of Alabama and Tennessee," remarked F. W. Black ford of the William F. Donovan com pany. "In fact, the supply this season is 1 roving so large, shipments so heavy, and the weather so warm that dealeis who are not adequately equipped find it difficult to dispose of their receipts without occasional losses from decay, for the egg, as is generally known, is most susceptible to the heat, and is apt to grow' stale after only short exposure when the thermometer is at this tem perature. The best of care as well ;.s skill and proper equipment is therefore necessary at this time. “The members of my firm have made an exhaustive study in regard to the best manner in which to handle eggs and their preparation for the market, and we have installed adequate equip ment for this purpose. We have direci connection with shippers and producer of character in this state and in Teu ■ nessee, and these men make special ' shipments by ^*quest, and the arrival | of consignments is so timed that it Ij , seldom indeed that we are overstocked As soon as a shipment is received a' > our plant it is placed in the hands o: : employes trained to test eggs befon ■ the candle, and only those found to bi altogether fresh and without flaw an * packed and placed on the local market 1 Of course, only a small percentage o ’ the eggs tested by us are now fount to have spoiled, but a comparalivel; large number slightly affected by tli f l*at and in such condition that the: would ordinarily become unfit for us > within a very short time. Eggs foum t in this condition are immediatel; 1 broken, and if in fit shape are placet in large cans which are then put in » 1 freezing room, where the temperatur a is low enough to congeal the mass int a solid cake of ice. We have spccia \ arrangements with out-of-town cub tomers for this product, which remain \f In excellent preservation, and Is ubcm r largely by northern bakeries.” t _ t Return* From New York "Things look good in the east,” sai 1 George Johnston, buyer for Johnsto J Brothers company of Birmingham, whi d has Just returned from New York, "an my visit proved profitable as well a e enjoyable. "I came in touch with a. large num e ter of jobbers and brokers who ar * agentB for extensive cotton good f manufacturing interests having mill 8 located in all parts of the south an east, and these men were most opt u mlstic in discussing sales, tt is ever* •• where stated that the foreign deman * this year for cotton goods is provin ® exceedingly heavy, and the souther I mills are getting their snare of iarg orders, Most of the southern Mill le way, find it to their advantage ^11 through Newr York agents. e in the metropolis I made large iases to supply our fall and aum trade, which, from present indi will prove most satisfactory. Some of the goods for which I made order in New York are now being manufactured by Georgia mills and one large order will come from the Avondale mills located in the Birmingham dis trict. These goods, will of course, be shipped direct from the manufacturing point. “I found New York dealers in a most optimistic mood, and the Italian situa tion seemed not to be worrying them I in the least. The weather prevailing there was quite exhilerating. The summer has hardly begun in Gotiiam, and as yet only about one man in 20 is to be seen on the streets with a straw hat. Indeed, I believe I saw as many overcoats as straws during my week's sojourn." ALABAMA PRESS Tuscaloosa News: With her teams lead. Ing the National, the American, and the Federal leagues. Chicago seems to be try ing to get a corner on baseball pennants. Huntsville Mercury-Banner: It Is claimed that the highest point In Alabama is Chehahaw mountain, near Talladega. It appears to be able to give the "horse laugh" to the other mountains in the state. Decatura Dally: When a progressive, enterprising, friendly tnwn like Hartselle goes ahead with a rush, as it is now do ing, it occasions no surprise. Loyaltv to the town and Its interests character izes its citizenship. The casual visitor Is met with a cherry "How do you do?" and about the next thing heard is "We've got a fine town, full of good people. It's growing and everything Is all right." No knockers in that town, Just friendly boosters for a deserving town. Anniston Evening Star: If modern no menclature can make golflne" out cf corduroy, we wonder what it can do for Jeans? THE I DE OP BIRDS From the Indianapolis News. The farmer, these days. Is a busy man, but what he Is doing should offer no ob stacle to' his consideration of at least one of the bulletins issued by the department of agriculture. The publication bears the title, "Some Common Birds Useful to the Farmer." and in its pages will he found a considerable amount of information that Is both Interesting and valuable. There Is no sentiment about the pamphlet; It does not discuss birds from the viewpoint of their plumage or their song; it does not base its plea for their protection and conservation on the grounds of beauty or humane consideration. On the con trary. It is practical from cover to cover; It tells the farmer plainly that birds are worth money to him, and precisely how and why. "The great majority of land birds," it says, "subsist upon Insects during the period of nesting and moulting, and also feed their young upon them during the first few weeks. Many species live al most entirely upon Insects, taking vege table food only when other subsistence falls. It is thus evident that In the course of a year birds destroy an Incalculable number of Insects, and It Is difficult to overestimate the value of their services In restraining the great tide of insect life." Most farmers, of course, are well aware of these facts. Here and there may be found some one to whom this infor mation Is new. hut such persons, surely, are extremely rare. Observation alone ought to serve to enlighten them, as it served, in the past, before biologists gave the subject their expert attention, to en lighten the country’s earlier colonists. Sometimes, however, as the bulletin shows, observation, while It may be relied upon generally, occasionally proves un trustworthy. "Birds," says the govern ment pamphlet, "are often accused nl eating this or that product of cultivation, when an examination of the stomachs shows the accusation to be unfounded.' It is plain from this, of course, that the suspected bird ought to have the benefit of the doubt. But if farmers' will read and Ftudy the government's bulletin and they will find It entertaining as wel as Instructive—and if rural scnoois ot) tained copies of it and devoted thlrti minutes to Its study, all false Impres sions and wrong conclusions would b< dissipated. The booklet tells briefly all that anv one needs to know about th food habits of over fifty birds, and from the dale so presented it is easy enough to determine the economical value of the common varieties described. BREAKS ALL RECORD* From the New York Sun. At the annual meeting of the Amerlcar Bible society in the Bible House Thurs day, the extraordinary Increase in Bible sales was reported of 1,119,289 volumes making a total for the year of 6,370.41* The preceding year showed a gain of 1. 201,566 volumes, l.ast year there went out from the Bible House 2,416.418 Bibles, ar increase of 89,028. and there were prlntec abroad for the society 3.974,044, a f?alr over the year before of 1,060.261 volumes. This gain was made In spite of the fac that Turkey and Mexico were almoa wholly shut off. Bibles and Testamenti were furnished to soldiers, in co-operatio, with European societies. The increhs was due partly to the larger absorptioi ' of Bibles in the far east mission fields ! Th 5 Rev. Dr. William I. Haven, one o ‘ the secretaries, has just returned fron these fields, and yesterday he congratulat ed the society's managers on the fact o these large Increases in Bible dietributioi at a time when the society ie approach ‘ ing the celebration of its centennial China. Japan, India and the Philippin ! Christian work has so grown as to mak 1 possible these large increases in Blbl distribution. 1 The financial receipts of the society i the nine months closing on December ! ! last were *428,900, as compared with *348, ’ 600 in the preceding nine months. Ther 1 was also an increase in legacies frot ' *26.000 for the earlier period to *64,800 lai ! year. The society's endowment no' 1 amounts to *2,387.78. Since it was founf ed, almost 100 years ago, the society ha circulated 109.890.356 volumes. New plana were announced yesterday 1 ■ make Bible distribution still large , among others a Bible congress In Sa Francisco this summer, the first of 11 1 kind ever held. 3 CONVINCING From Harpers. - "Mr. Lane called again thie mornlni e air,” said the ne weffice boy. aa M 8 Stuart entered the office. S "Did you tell him I'd gone to Europ 1 as I told you to. Edward?" asked M • Stuart. "Yea. sir." anewered' the boy, "I tol J him you star d tV* unu-c!"-" , "That'f a *aod boy,' s. d tuart. "An wrhat did he *ay?" "He wants, to knew when you'd t c back." repllsf- : Id ward and I told Ml •. 'attar lunch,’ sir." M ?f ‘h. Ife,. ADRIFT WITH THE TTMFS WHAT IS NEEDED. The uplift takes so many forms, ’TIs often hard to say. Just what it is that really harms A world by nature gay. A great diversity of views Are met on every hand; Though stacks of pamphlets we peruse, But few we understand. Sometimes we think, when clamors rise. And angry looks appear, And one pugnacious faction tries To pull some other’s ear, The world would far more progress make, With less sham and pretense, If those who'd fain our consciene wake Would use more common sense. LITERALLY TRUE. "I thought you said there was a rich and varied landscape about this bunga low. I see nothing but billboards." "Quite so. But the advertisements on those billboards are changed on an av erage of once a month and the corset ad vertisements, to say the least, are—hum rich." AN INTERIOR PRODUCT. "Sir," exclaimed the pallid poet, "these sonnets are the cherished children of my brain, yet you scorn them." "If such a thing were possible," said the callous editor, "I would advise you to take a course in mental eugenics." A BASE LOT. "Is it possible that American manufac turers wmuld swindle the brave French on army contracts?" "Not only possible, my friend, but ex tremely probable. During the Spanish American war they didn’t do a thing to Uncle Sam." NOT TO BE THOUGHT OF. "A little exercise before breakfast gives one a hearty appetite." "I couldn’t risk it," said the (commuter. "Why not?" "I! I worked up an appetite for break fast it would take time to eat it and then I’d miss my train." THE MINORITY. 1 Now, Italy, with all her might. To bloody war has gone. Alas, how many nations fight. How few are looking on: STILL, CHEERFUL. Did you attend Miss Seresum's birth day party?" "Oh, yes. I was there." What kind of time did you have?" The best ever." What Is your Impression of her?" "She's a game loser." THE most talked about car. Jokes about the Ford car have become S so numerous that part of them have beer, published In a book, under the title “Fun about Fords." Here's a sample where the book is opened to catch the casual read er's eye: j A farmer stepped off a country road to let a large limousine pass and then stepped back just in time to be struck by a Ford, which was behind the larger car. When he had been picked up and the dust brushed off his clothes the farmer was asked, "Why didn't you look to see if another car was coming?" "Gosh," he answered, "how was I to know the first one had a colt running aftet it?” THE “ARTISTE." She dances on her toes, oul, oul, And's thought to hall from Frahce: She calls herself “Mile. Fit!" And has a wicked glance. But rumor says in Kankakee Her name was Maggie Vance, A waitress in the “Busy Bee" Who'd never heard of France. MORE THAN MOST DO. "We are organizing a civic improvement association. Don't fall to join.” "Oh. I haven't time to clean up any body's hack yard but my own.” "You are just the man we are looking for! We'll make you president.” —-—.....I DIGEST OF THE MAGAZINES From the Philadelphia Evening Ledger. THERE are many grades of ad venture, from the Arctic ex plorer plodding through un charted snows, down the line through milder forms of sport to the slum ming party touring Chinatown, or the grass widow looking for plunder. They are all adventurers from various points of view. The real adventure of the wilder ness was for a long time rather mo nopolized by the males, along with most of the other diversions of life, hut, as all the world knows, this is changing rapidly. Among the adven ture stories in this month s magazines are two by women, told in the first person, tingling with the Joys and the hardships of nature and the forest pri meval. Mary J. lathe, who bears tbs formidable letters F. R. G. S. after hei name, describes a trip through th<‘ Canadian Rockies In Harper s (1). In cidentally, she analyzes in her firsl paragraph, rather interestingly, the urge and enthusiasm which carry these climbers through extreme hardships with undaunted eagerness. It began at Winnipeg in June. "Why shouuldn t we go in and have a toon at that big mountain?” Miss Sprln gate and I asked each other. She, 0 hardy Englishwoman, was keen foi roughing it: I was at home on the trail It was Inevitable that our trip should materialize Into something worth while "There's a fine new country beyond the Smoky," the Alpine club, mountain eers had said. They had glimpsed il from the peaks of the Robinson coun try. Obviou^. here was a chance foi personal achievement, not merely achievement for public approbation Put achievement for our own pure de light. Here was a chance to see what on the government maps , was only f solitary white spot. Who knew, save o solitary Indian or two. what was hid den In the recesses of those dense forest# and forbidding ranges? On our longest day out. we had beei on the trail 10 hours and had traveled 120 miles, we had made an ascent of GOO feet and a descent of 4000. It was thi only day we bad stopped to make tei amt have some substantial food on th< trail. Heretofore a few raisins, a llttli sweet chocolate and a cracker or tw, had kept us going from fi:30 breakfast un t‘! a 2:30 p. m. camp. • * * That nigh our campground was so steep that •oiled out of my tent * * * On the home trail I could scarcely dial one foot after the other. The unvarlei 1 diet of unsalted caribou was palling upoi 1 me. I-Was growing desperately weak. ’ would have given my birthright for i 1 pinch of salt. Troubled lest darknes overtake. I marched ahead, putting al my strength In this final apurt the las 1 two hours back to camp from a 10-da: ' climb. It was not enough. My water tilled boot* retarded me at every Stef ‘ I fell In my tracks when we stopped t rest. Presently I was stumbling and fall ' Ing just becauae my feet would not co ’ ordinate. Our entrance Into camp that night wa * one of the Intenaest moments of my lifi Safe, dry-clad and satisfied In the shelte ’ of the base camp. I now realised for th 1 first time that we had taken long chancel but wc had explored "Kltchl," the bl 8 mountain. 1 Another woman, EUnore Rupert Stew 1 art, gives a naively feminine desertptio v of her experiences on a Montana elk hun ' She is a western rancher's wife, and at companled her husband and a neighbor' o family on a long overland trip, whlc ', she Is describing In the Atlantic Monthls 11 Such a way as we came over. Sue * jolting and sliding. I had no Idea wagon could be got across such place: 1 kept shutting my eyes trying not to as the terrifying pieces (there was no roa< t, and opening them again to see the beaut •. spread everywhere, until Mr. 8tewai said: "It must make you nervous to rl<3 !, over mountain roads. Don't bat your eyi •. so fast and you'll see more.” Mo then 1 stiffened my back and ke| d my eyes open, and I did see more. Then came a long, hard climb. At la: 4 we leached the top and sat down on sun: lou'ders. I was plumb out of breat J but men who are most gallant sInwhsN t are absolutely -keartleM on a hunt 1 wi scarcely through panting before we began to descend. AVe hastily secreted ourselves along the narrow gorge through which ' the elk must pass. AA’e were all on one side, and Mr. Haynes said to me: "Rest jour gun on that rock and aim at the first rib hack of the shoulder." It didn't seem a minute before we heard the beat e * of their hoofs and a queer panting noise that I can’t describe. First came a beau- ; tifui thing with his head held high; hit great antlers seemed to He half his length on his back: his eyes were startled, and his shining black mane seemed to bristle. I heard the report) of guns, and he tum bled In a confused heap. He tried to rise, hut others coming leaped over him and knocked him down. Mr. Haynes shouted tq me. "Shoot, shoot; why don't you shoot?” So I fired my Krag; hut next I found myself pick- f Ing myself up and wondering who bad j struck me and for what. I was so dizzy I could scarcely move, hut I got down to > where the others were excitedly' admir- : ;ng the two dead elk that they’ said were the victims of Mrs, O'Shaughnesssy's gun. She was as excited and delighted as if ahe had never declared she would ■not kill anything. "Sure, it's many a. meal they'll make for little hungry mouths," she said. She wras rubbing her shoulder ruefully. "I don't want to Are any more hlg guns. I thought old Goliath had hit me a biff with a blackthorn shll- \ laleh,” she remarked. Mr. Haynes turned to me and said; I "You are a dandy hunter. You didn’t shoot at all until after the elk were gone, and the way you held your gun, It is a wonder it didn’t knock your head off instead of just smashing your jaw." It was dark before we reached camp. Supper was ready, twit I went to bed at \ once. They all thought It was because 1 was dlsapppointed.1 but it was because J I was so stiff and sore I could hardly move, and so tired I couldn't sleep. WOW! A DARBY DOG STORY From the New A'ork World. Darby. Pa.—The most disgusted bull dog in the world belongs to Alex Kane, { a barber, of this place. 1 The militant spirit of the animal was aroused when James Martin, a driver. ■ began sliding coal Into Kane’s base ment. The dog flew at Martin and ol> 1 tained a "strangle hold" on his right ’ leg. For 10 minutes the dog growled and chewed without having the sllght 1 est effect on Martin. Finally the anl 1 mal let go and crept sheepishly under the porch. ! • After the dog had released his grip, 1 Martin pulled up his right trouseis 1 leg to find out how much damage the 1 teeth of the dog had Inflicted on hie 1 artificial limb of wood, metal and I leather. 1-*-■«. t THE STREAMLET'S RUSHY’ BANKS r By John Keats. . Linger awhile upon some bending planks That lean against a streamlet's rushy banks. • And watch intently nature's gentle dolwgtj] • They will be found softer than ringdMtt^ cooings. How silent comes the water round tliLjfl bend! H 9 Not the minutest whisper does it send * • To the o'erhanging sallows; blades or r grass t Slowly across the chequer’d shadows pass, ’ Why, you might read two sonnets, era ? they reach To where the hurrying freshness ays preach n A natural sermon o'er their pebbly beds; AVhere swarms of minnows show their lit tle heads; ■ Staying their wavy bodies 'gainst ths s streams. ft To taste the luxury of sunny beams . Temper'd with cooings. • • • ' The ripples seem right glad to reach thos« II cresses 1 And cool themselves among the em rala i. tresses; I The while they cool themselves .they freshness give, > And moisture, that the bowery green may V live; ’ t Bo keeping up an Interchange of favors, e Like good men in the truth of their be« havlors. Sometimes goldfinches one by one will drop '1 From low-hung branches; little space they stop, !t But sip and twitter and their feathers o ■>«**: Theifoff at once, as a wanton freak; Or perhaps, to show their black and golds* • wings. s Pausing upon their yellow fluttering* ... ■ - ...