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Bismarck daily tribune. (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, January 23, 1909, Image 2

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Persistent link: https://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn85042242/1909-01-23/ed-1/seq-2/

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?M|fe:? ••,-...•
MkV*' ••:.•••'•
4, 4. a
For Twenty-four Hours Ending
7 p.m., Jan. 22.
Temperature' -—. Maximum 34
minimum 25.
Precipitation 0.
Wind Maximum velocity 28
miles from southeast. 4
Havn't you any "work for want
ads," just now-r-sudh as finding a buy
er for something?
Miss Eva Bolden of the Valley City
high school, will preach at the sal
vation army '••,hall tonight. Subject,
Frank Mckenzie of Wild Rice, Cass
county, arrived in the city Friday
afternoon with his bagpipes to take
part in the Caledonian celebration
Monday night at the armory. He is
the champion piper of the northwest.
Joseph Hare is just having completed
a fine bowling alley. He has had an
expert from Minneapolis lay the
floors. Everything is made according
to the requirements of the American
Bowling association. It will soon be
ready for use.
Carl Brown, the wsestler,. says he
is ready for another bout with Billie
Hall and that Campbell had better
wrestle Adams and Tom O'Leary and
he will meet the winner.
Last evening at the Baptist parson
age Rev. Newcome. said the words
which united in wedlock George R
Thomas of this city, to Miss Eva Ev
erett of Jamestown. The contracting
parties were accompanied by Mr. and
Mrs. Fred Forsythe as witnesses.
Miss Lois Barnes entertained her
class mates of the senior class of the
high school Friday evening at the
home of her parents on Fourth St.
A number of guessing contests were
indulged in and music was enjoyed
by the young people. They did am
ple justice to the refreshments serv
ed. :,,
The Masonic lodge gave one of its
enjoyable socials at the hall Friday
night, at which a large number of
Masons and their families were pres
ent. The Three-Star orchestra fur
nished enjoyable music for dancing
in which nearly everyone present
participated. Cards occupied the at
tention of others. The ladies of the
Eastern Star chapter furnished Jigbt
refreshments. '*.' :..:*%'':•*'
Deputy Sheriff Joseph Olson of Mc
Lean county, was in the city over
Thursday night in charge of a patient
for the hospital for the insane at
Jamestown. They left for that city
on delayed No. 2 Friday morning.
Rev. Edward Futtk of Los AUgeles,
Cal., and his wife left for home on
iNo. 4 Friday afternoon. They have
been visiting their son, Frank E.
Funk cashier of the First National
bank at Washburn, and the family of
•N. F. Boucher of this city. On their
way home they will visit Mrs. Funk's
father and mother, who are still liv
ing in Illinois.
,v The conference of Sunday school
workers closed at the Baptist church
Friday morning. Dr. McEWresh took
the topic "How to Perpetuate the Sun
day School," and discussed it. Those
present conferred oh the general work
•and Prof. A. M. Locker spoke on
grading the schools. There were only
few present at the morning ses-
#^fij The' dance at ,th armory ^Friday
:^iSjBis*t'was-iweIl-at^ everyone
:^^^%res^^ii«Be* to have, the- social
time of seasoh. It was tl«
?|i' 'oT^.•.#*/•••* f**"1 e«Bcess.: -The
^i§rMe^J^m*s^ynihf- aemsoit have
at the last meeting, and everyody
was In favor of the legislature pass
ing a law whereby counties ban $£:
bond^ for seed gra$, where it is nec
Petitions are being circulated to be
sunt to the Jegislature and farmers
should not hesitate to sign said peti
tion at the first opportunity.
The next meeting of the 'Farmers'
union will (be held in the McCreedy
hall Saturday afternoon, January 30,
1909, and the topic for that meeting
will be "Insurance."
Drlscoll News: The Eastern Bur
leigh County Teachers' association
will meet at the Drlscoll school build
ing Saturday, Feh. 13, at 2 o'clock.
The following program will be render^
Music .....-....,.....,...... .... School
Teacher's Exchange ... .Miss Buetow
Special Programs in School
.., ... :.. Mr. Horner
Optional Mrs. Woodworth
How to Teach Civics .. Mr. Tandberg
Solo Miss Gillet
Sheriff D. J. McGillis took John
Mbssbrucker, Jacob Wenger and Geo.
Casper to the reform school at Man
dan Friday on No. 3. They lhad pre
viously been sentenced by Judge Win
chester to stand committed to the in
stitution until they are 21 years of
«ge. All the stolen money has been
recovered with the exception of about
two dollars by the merchants taking
back the articles the boys had pur
chased with the stolen funds and re
funding the money.
Indications point to a record crowd
in attendance at the retail hardware
merchants' convention next week,
and the Commercial club is anxious
to have the delegates comfortably
housed during their stay. Those hav
ing roomsUo rent for the'four days
will notify either Secretary Young,
phone 78, or the Commercial club
rooms, phone 313.
Supt. Dan Slattery of the capital,
has picked up a small gold ring, evi
dently that of a child, in ttie building.
The owner can have the same by
proving property. Some lady attend
ing the session in the house chamber
yesterday left behind a black leather
hand bag, which is in the keeping of
Mr. Slattery awaiting an owner.
Wild Oats.
Barkeep—Wot'U yeh have?
Stdodent B.—Got any champagne on
Student B.r—Gimme a nickers wort*
of ice.—Cornell Widow.
Oh! Oh!
"Yes, sir," said the pompous Indi
vidual, "I aiways pay cash tor every
thing I get."
"Dear me," exclaimed the matter-Of
fact person. "What's the matter with
your credit?"^—Chicago Daily New*.
No Worse.
"Do you think the world is growing
"Duiino* as 'tis," responded the old.
man. "They're tellin* the very fish
stories I heard when I was a boy.
Philadelphia Ledger.
A Deadly Brigade.
"So your son is cow a soldier, hey,
Uncle Ben?"
"Yes, sab he's done Jlned the mali
cious corpse, sah."—Baltimore Amer
A Desirable Quality
A barrister observed to le*™*/1
brother in court that he (nought his
whiskers very unprofessional.,
"Tbu are right," replied his friend,
"a lawyer cannot be too barefaced."—
Tit-Bits. *&•••• gsfe::•{. 7
fUrmit SupeHluo**.
Keeper—Hi, boy!=3Y% «*P
fish here without: a ^rihliL
Boy—Welt Tm getUn* on .well
enough with a worm!-r-Phllad«plu
Inquirer/ 'i~: ^^''."•• .,/-':'«#*£''!*':'
WeM MateheoV
a tonS^ttreirtb,
Aunt Alice and
•3met ai:.the
yfa^jsOlK^ were
:yt0^t^i^gn^yy\r^^ ,....,. r^-
Meetings will be held in the He
greedy nail evesy second end fourth
First Bridesmaid—Thej^|i: ere
matched don't you think? Vj?
Second Br|desniaid--^Rathetv-she's a
grass widow, and h^s a vegetarian.—
London Opinion
Vy M% A S A S
It was.Saiurday night, and owing te
the temporary absence of his wife It
fell to Mr. Brown to attend to the usual
process: ot /giving his eight-year-old
son a bath ajnul putting him te bed- He
had left bis evening pager with-a
man's reluctance and had honied mm?.
tars along with more speed than (He
tittle chap was accustomed to. How7*
ever, be endured It all without a pro
test untU It came te the pra:
was hie habit after ^New 1 lay
ask the divine Messfnfr upon a lot
ef relatives and friends, ealHnig
"jrleaee, God," he-began, "blese
aM n«amm^ grandpa and
Awat Edtth and Undo George
A MMtae. Hie father, thinking
Ulf the itot of
This was .te
eould standi
he exdaimed,
^P«pa ^wl^':'rh^uljm|r:im^
•0K :*m,','si P»««liaee-: In Wbb
Brothers' mHtlhery end Isdles' suK
w4lt prove benencisl. to
It^ltUMuMiM uliiiliiiiii
The vaudeville program at the Gem
is certainly fulfilling the1 expectations
of the tremendous: crowds: which
nightly fill the house. MarHon and
Rosalie, the Parisian soubrettes, do an
act of refined singing and danctng in
which they feature the automobile
song and Dutch wooden shoe dance
that pleases all. Albertus and Aitus
are about the funniest pair of joug
glersy who ever came over, the pike
and certainly do their share to draw
the crowd. The animate! pictures
have' such fine films as "The Rubber
Heels," aNcomedy "Roman Idyll," a
light drama "Turning Oyer a "New
Leaf," a feature film. The song:
"Won't You he My Romecv"" Is beau
tifully illustrated and "Well sun?*
There wtl be a matinee -jai.', 3 p.
this afternoon.
Impatient Sueie.
"Oh. I can't thread thi» needle ma,"
Was little Susie's cry
"Just as the thread is going through
The needle winks its eye."
—Woman's Home Companion.
Twentieth Century Perils,
'Isn't there danger," said the timid
man, "of dropping things: from' an air
ship on the people below?"
"That isn't the worst," answered the
candid inventor. "You're lucky if ths
whole airship doesn't fall on you."—
Wsshlnarton Star.
Oh. Feathsrsl \fec.
The little child of the slums was
enjoying her first visit to the country
and was enthusiastic in her admiration
of the farmyard.
"Just look at the chickings!" she
exclaimed in ecstasy. "They're all
running about raw!"—London Opinion.
Ever Notice? sf '4£v-r,
Achilles had been disguised by his
mother as a girl, but Ulysses soon dis
tinguished him from the genuine
"He didn't look daggers when an
other girl had a new fall gown," ex*
plained the craftiest of the Greeks.—
(Cansck City Journal.
Wise Guy, '}'.••• ^.,
She—Frankly, now, if you' had to
choose between me and a million, what
would you do?
He—rd take the million. Then It
would be easy.—Life. .-.,-•«-.'
A Snap.
"I would be willing to work If I
oould get the sort of job, I want"
"What would that beT^
"Well, I wouldn't mind calling off
the stations on an Atlantic liner."—Ex.
His Oninion.
"I hear you solemnized a
"Solemnised is hardly the word for
It." responded the J. P. caUtlpWsly.
"1 simply spliced a doubtful title to
a million dollars."—Louisville Courier
Th« Rotinil of Humor.
"I should think you would run owl
•T material," said the friend.
"Oh, there's always something doing?
the seasons change," responded the
press humorist. "Last spring we toe*
iown the stovepipe joke."
"How we put it up again."
Tickets on Sale.
Tickets for the 'Harris Grand Lec
ture Course, on sale at Beardsley &.
Finney's and at Jorgenson's cigar
stand at the capifol. .*
,i Attiifed in a stylish cut. a wbjll&crai
imt.bwtutlfyint his front an4
hat decoating his head, the middle?
•ivd ntan with the Iron-gray hair
strolled nonchalantly and elegantly
down the thoroughfare twirling a small
cane In and out of Hit first and sec
ond flngera. Suddenly a,roughly dress-,
ed individual with a? •week's' growth of
beard upon his ugly countenance
brushed violently against MIm.
"Do you know who you are bump
ing/?" asked the weu-dreesed man with
a display of,agitated ti|digiiatl6ri. ,.
'No. And I don't care,!' came the
prompt reply.
"What do you mean?"vs
"I mean what I say."
"Don't be insulting," continued the
stylish.person ,v:•''&*%•&$ f'V
"Bosh!"' :•:•?•.*•: & 4,kM\'
"Bosh! Don't bosh me! I'll take
this caiie and thrash you within an Inch
of your.'Ufa.".: .••.* t- •&< .••. ~-.%: ..
"Don't try it. You're: too fat."
"Too fat? I repeat it, you low-born
whelp, do you kubw who you are
"No. It don't make any dlfferencs,
either." .-J^
"Well, I'll enlighten you. I am ths
Honorable Henry *Y Koniay«e, capi
talist, magnate, millionaire and :Inci
dentally president of the ^inalisamatel'
Metropolitan Borough Street Railways
"Is it possible?"
"And let me tell you who I a»."
"I don't care to make your acquaint
ance." 'p.
"Just listen,
"I woa't." ,,. ., ..-. .,„.:.*• •_
"I am the president of .thf 6tr,set
Railway Conductors* and MoWrrft*n'a
union, so just stop this'(foolishness and
move on." '. •.'•:v1r-.'
A light da.wned upor.ttd»"rs«:hman.
His face pictured autvnl .s/.vr ae hs
turned and walked away.—The Bohe
mian Magazine.
Changing Weathsr^ldsal From th»
Salesman's Point of View.
"Naturally," said the umbrella sals*.
man, we sell more umbrellas when It
rains than When it doesn't, but ideal
weather for the retail umbrella trads)
would be found in a constant succes
sion of days that started bright and
elear and wound up stormy.
'To be*sure we sell more or less um
brellas all the time on clear days as
well as on rainy. In time of peace
prepare for war, you know, and that
sort of thing, and there are people
who buy their umbrellas and have
them ready but it is on such a day I
have described that we sell the most
"You take a bright and sunny and
lovely day that promises to stay so
and that holds so until along in the
afternoon, a day on which the streets
and the stores are filled with shoppers
and then let a st6rm come up, taking
people unaware—then we sell um
brellas. ':/••'':'f
"On such a day we have customers
here standing along the umbrella
counter perhaps two or three deep,
people tuying umbrellas On such a
day we sell hundreds, of, umbrellas In
one afternoon. It's an ill wind that
blows nobody good, don't youknOWT
the rainy days are the bright days In
the umbrella business."
',..-„•. /Invisible. *. v:.jv^,i ,^..
The old broket touched the messen
ger boy on the shoulder.
"Say, sonny," he inquired, "didn't
I engage your brother three hours
a|b to deliver a message and return
W«3B. '^answer?*'
^•Believe you did, boss," responded
the messenger nonchalantly.
"Well, he said he would go like the
wind and I haven't seen him since."
''And yon won't see him, bogs. Did
you ever see the wmay':%-.v, .' ^'i
.b4s:.o^rn' quiet, bott determined w^, has brought ato^ reforms
ChineeejBhiftii^ thap aw
italmMt^llLowery' XniKM:•••':y\M l^X^M^-
Miss Sweet—How old do you think
I am? ^\''M^\:S -y^^''-^^i^''
lb. \pieasure^ 'loVt* :kn^
Whatever it is, you don't |b^|t it
Wild twrkeye'^HIe!.. *p^ti$0m?
Daniel K. Coder of 'Ctfy^pHtm^.
don county, is a huhter with a predl*
IscUon for shooting wild turkeys, He
:*il^klliedv?tir»' ::tW*year
.hi^ln9 r-oiit^.ealeR on- "Jadljsa^ veu|ta
and'trimmed'''hats at -Webb:.Bros|.g -.
has done more ^a^a^yblhcr'n^a^
ing healthy and innocent amusement for the thousands of children of the v^
streets in all the big citiesv His association has grown until today it is
power with which all municipal offlcers-bjave to,w
annual appropriations,
the water, sighed.. ,. .^.u^- ^•,-..-i- 'j^
"W*rS' asked hie friend, iron
SO sad?" '••."-'•-•••: yi::&
"Alttl" he answered .*1«^BSA Is
,ti^s^ave,:,ot.i«iyVflr»*-wisW' .. v.., *&:":^
Tin friend's lips curled svperelnetfi*i
.'• -. ». •.•.'•..: -'M. I'-ii-V-^Vd',.-^ •-..-?
•rBut you are married again," he
The Reellnlng Artclents.
We stand and sit too much, a!cord
ing to the views of Dr. Gelbke
lecture before a body of German phy
siciahs. Chairs may have been lmoinr
to the ahdents, but they were used
only on extraordinary occaslona.
Persons of culture as'well as the bar
barians took their meals and their
rest reclining. Dr. Kruche of Mmiioh
says that to: this *»y, ,the..orjbMtl^«
people prefer the reclining eft.
ting posture, and the faat that they
lie not upon the back bvrt upon the
stomach acoeunts tor t&e *etfer' and
more supple figures of these people.
T.' C..-V^^i,-^T^^M^it
...:,_. i.-'Pfwidenji /••.• y^K?,^
i\ P. BAraB, Y#^8t!i|
nineteen and a haU and ntaeteen
sjoanda, reepectively. This leaves hUB
tree MH ahoot twoA moi?t bjfore fli#j
eioee of the seeeon, and those he eg.
peeta to get quite handfly. v^: v' !^..
Mr. Coder the most successful
wild turkey nnn|er in the centralpart
ef the state, as his own records jhow
that since he began gimhmg for them
oterthirty years ago-he has shot
In oneear lie got twenty-one and In
another,nineteen, which were hie ban
ner records. Under tho present lair
the llnilt\m"«om*a?'year^^
..y:i7SJ(i.- •-.'•- •. •.•-•'
..:', '.- ... .*•.
"Yes," he said, "and my second w|s
won't.go hear,the,:water.''—Ttt-li^|~t ::f
"j r'' ~-y ./. [':r'"''f^.^''1''^^'i
'"'Satan's'.' Wllee.#-:'''':"^"
"Npw, Willie, ydu know I told yov fg:
aot to go swimming, and yet you ha,|re
.been in the water.'^ f$ X: ^J^J^iBffi.}'
"I know It, ma, but Satan tam|led
.me.".- •••.•• ••.,-'=..'u. •••.'•• •.'•, .•: ./,•- .-..^:
"And. why did you not tell Sataa te '.'
get behind you?" ,,... .:•. :i&-:%-1r
—I did. and he kicked me
o:^m •-•v.: ~yf&
lisoes Drafts Payable in All
'*-. •'. ,- ,'''v •'. \. ""••''"., '-.•
^'•../[. I ii'ii'iiiu•*BPr::.--\±:
steamedat tbsBUsisrek Dry CUM1SS( sad
Dye Works. We suute a sseeialtir of dfjr
eleaalw, *MiMisg. vaa^steWlal. ./sjel's1'
Ifke new, YoumiealwarsptesenUMe when
wshfep .foai wa*dMbe ia otder/aad the
'wasareMnall a
4fc^idWa^AF,l»^tae^ssfa^riia^rasfc^ «^j.-,_^.
•psje 'WI»P*»4 WwWi-P-iSB^ppsB'-S^pBji wwmm
'.:- ., KSJ
BJjf.'/. '^Vf

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