Friday, Aiurast 18,1911.
lllen and teams. A" wint
vlnhig and hauling coal, In
J&ty. Address J. K. Dor-
WANTED—Boy to learn the book
Kib'lndlng trade. Apply Tribune office.
RANTED—At once, experienced
iNTED—Two German girls at the
iNTED—A dishwasher at the Pal
ANTED—Competent girl for gen
ital housework, good wages, 822
ygftast Main. Phone 595J
^NTED—Competent girl for gen*
*J housework. Apply Mrs. C. J.
isch, corner Ave and Mandan
re. Phone 423.
ITED—House girls to read "Help
ited, Female," columns and ap-WANTED—Furnished
to those advertisiug for help.
positions always open for
ADIE8 may earn good pay at home
flatting newspapers. Send 10c for
ffcuide." N«W Process Co., DepL
[WANTED—Position, man and wife
if |^no children) want position in hotel
"''(i Woman good cook or housekeeper.
sMan as clerk, good all round hotel
Jp man. Good references. Address
Ix*H., care Tribune.
9 N ED— By a young widow with
Vipfe child, house keeping position
jpon ranch or farm. Address "P"
1PENT8 WANTED—Sales agents for
/[ifturblne and (pressure blowers, feed
vWter regulators, ventilating fans,
•txmpe guaranteed territory large
-itemlssions. Wing, No. 906 Ply-FOR
Hath Bklg., Chicago, 111.
er, 'ANTED TO RENT Houses.
Nort^ED—To rent furnished house
phy two. Phone 467L.
S^JBD—to rent, 6 or 7 room mod
**£fthouse. Not particular as to
of heat. For travelling man,
^Sy September 1. F. E. Young.
'0ft RENT—Modern furnished room.
'Mrs. Brady, 307 E. Fourth St.
riBMt RENT—Four nice rooms in new
^modern house commercial men
preferred. 401 Fifth St., Phone 576.
'.Mrs. Wm. Laist.
iOR RENT—Two front rooms in
'strictly modern house. 216 9th St
pR~R ENT—Furnished rooms in Da
kota block. Phone 303.
HUNTED BY A WALRUS.
I'fite Big Bull Got Quitt Sociable Be
1 1 fore Ho Was Dono For.
In George Borup's "A Tenderfoot
$. With Peary" appears an exciting in
«ldent of walrus hunting. During a
raid upon, a herd of fifty walrus asleep
on a pan "it was blowing some, and
(the choppy waves made the shooting
look as If the guns had spiral barrels."
'The ineffective target practice produc
ed these hair raising developments a
jew seconds later: "Suddenly a giant
^jull rose out of the water just along
Me of Wesharkoupsl. He threw his
\5rpoon. but as the barb came off he
might as well have heaved a lead pencil,
the walrus gave a derisive grunt div
dd. and a second later shot out of the
prater on the other side, deluged us
tfth liquid and came down slap bang
a the gunwale of the boat opposite
\"By this time Wesharkoupsl was
)gh in the air and out for an altitude
word. Instead of throwing his har
fjion he threw his soul into his yells
,id just spat In the brute's face. The
Tiber huskies were trying to back wa-
or hit him over the head with the
irs. nearly sideswiping me and Inci
entally short circuiting their cussing
Wesharkoupsl. the walrus and ev
rything is general.
"All this time the walrus was sitting
longside of me. asking if there were
ay more at home like Wesharkoupsl.
was easier to pull bis whiskers or
nash his mug with my list than
Soot. If 1 held the gun to my shoul
jer the muzzle would stick beyond his
ead. so. firing from the hip. I
tm the entente cordiale."
GETTING THE FACTS.
Hit Second Story Probably Differed
From tho First One.
'Long experience as a consulting at
torney has given Mr. Mooney a judi
cal habit of mind. He never accepts
facts' at par value, but always
ids those facts into the rear office
4 drops acid in their ejes. The oth
day a friend rushed In. warm and
jfkooney." said the friend excitedly,
Ve been insulted. Hinks Just met
and called me all sorts of names.
Want ads are ONE CENT A WORD EACH DAT (one-naif cent a word each subsequent Insertion
ONLY WHEN PAID CASH IN ADVANCE). Minimum charge Ads sent to us with promises to pay.
cVplLr inISL:notbeinaerted except where you carry an W count on our ledger and
tas tte amounts are too smaU to pay for the ost of collection. Each Initial, number and figure count one
word. Always pay cash In advance and secure the half rate.
FOR RENT—Two furnished rooms,
$12 and- $16 per month. Mrs. L.FOR
Sell, Phone 206M
FOR RENT—Furnished room in new,
modern house, 3 blocks from Trib
une building. Telephone 248 or
FOR RENT Furnished modern
rooms, $7 and $8.00 per month.
Phone 212 J. 38 Main street
FOR RENT—Modern rooms and board
at Dunraven Place. 212 3rd st. phone
FOR RENT—Furnished room in new,
modern house, 3 blocks from Trib
une building. Telephone 248, or
FOR RENT—Seven-room house on
outskirts barn, poultry house, city
water in house and barn 11 lots,
fenced cheap. Keenan Land Co.
house for fam-
ily of three. P. O. Box 277.
Address "H," care
house for tw».
WANTED—'Dressmaking, all kinds
afternoon and evening gowns a spe
cialty. Phone 440K. 119 Mandan
COME AND SEE SPLENDID CROPS
in Polk county, Wis., on the Soo
line between Twin Cities and Du-FOR
luth-Superior. Corn 6 to 8 feet
high July 11. Good farms at low
prices. Send for free list Baker,
F34 St. Croix Falls, Wis.
FOR SALE—First-class 1-4 Sec. of
land, one-half mile from Roseglen,
N. Dak. $20.00 per acre. Write
owner, Edward Baley, Gen. Deliv
ery, Los Angeles, Cal., or see Jas.
A. Shea, Roseglen, N. Dak.
SALE—New, modern seven-room
house excellent location. Bargain.
Inquire of W. E. Lahr.
FOR RENT—5-room furnished house.
Phone 132J. George Little.
FOR RENT—House of five rooms,
well located. Geo. M. Register.
"FOR RENT—Seven room house on
outskirts, barn, poultry house, city
water in house and barn, 11 lots,
fenced cheap. Keenan Land Co.
BOARD AND ROOM.
ROOM and board in modern bouse.
407 Sitxh street.
LOST In Bismarck. Double barrell
Parker shotgun. Return to Chas.
Amidon, Fargo, N. D.
TTe'velKiu 'uoui.'.e over that"partition
matter, you know. He said I was a
pettifogger sind a thief and a scoun
drel aud a perjurer and a wire haired
"Vial" said Mr. Mooney. sitting far
ther down In his chair and looking at
the speaker over his glasses. "Urn!
And what do you propose to do about
"What do I propose to do about it?
Why.-I was so astounded at the mo
ment that I could make no reply at
all. But. now that I have somewhat
recovered myself. I have determined
to go down to Hinks* office and knock
his block off. I'll beat him to a quiv
••Um!" said Mr. Mooney, slipping
down a notch. "Um! So would I if
anv one called me the names that
Hinks called you. But before you go
suppose you sit down with me for a
The iudijrnant friend took a chair.
"Now." said Mooney. dangling his
eyeglasses, "what are the facts in the
No Casto In Snores.
The cause and cure of snoring con
cern ail classes, says the London
Chronicle. We have record that both
the house of lords and the workhouse
have suffered from it. There was a
former Duke of Norfolk who fell into
the habit of sleeping audibly in the
lords, and it happened that be was
hard at it on one occasion when a bill
concerning the parish of Great Snor
ing. In Norfolk, came before the bouse.
The roar of laughter with which the
bill's title was greeted awakened the
duke and relieved his fellow peers. At
the other end of the social scale we
have the poor law commission minori
ty's commendation of the ingenious
workhouse master who divided the old
men at night so that the snorers and
the deaf men slept in one ward and
the rest In another.
Sho Know All Right
"You don't know what that's a plc
tnre of. Johnny?" said Mrs. Lasping in
a tone of reproof. "You ought to read
your ancient history more. That is
the temple of Dinah at Emphasis.
SALE—Lots in Riverview Ad
dition. No sidewalk or sewer as
sessments choicest residence part
of the city building limit and line
established. Easy time payments
or liberal discount for all cash.
Several houses to be erected this
fall. In case of death of purchaser
we will give deed to heirs. For
full particulars see F. E. Young.
WANTED—A fresh imilch cow must
be tested. P. E. Byrne, 210 Thayer.
FOR SALE—Rugs, stair carpet, bed
room furniture, gasoline stove and
oven, etc Call at Nielson Co.'s
FOR RENT—Sept 1st, good two story
house, 709 6th St. M. P. Skeela.
FOR SALE OR TRADE—160 acres of
land 31-2 miles from Driscoll and
four from tSerling. A snap if taken
at once. Inqure W. E. Reeves, Bis
LOTS FOR SALE in all parts of Bis
marck east of high school and north
of railroad. Will give terms to suit
buyers. Buy of owner and save com
mission. J. W. Bull, over Dabl's
WANTED—Sewing by the day at
orice. jMinnie Anderson Devaul,
WANTED"to~buy on the 'installment
plan* a six or seven-room house,
not too far out. J. A. Smith. Call
at the Settler office.
8ALE—High class pointers, bred
from championship field dogs. These
are hunting dog*, not bench show
dogs. For information phone or
write F. E. Galloway, Brlttin, N. D.
WANTED TO 8ELL—Pointer puppies.
Females, $5.00 males, $10.00. J.
A Smith. Call at the Settler office.
FOR RENT—Barn suitable for auto
mobile, near center of city. Run
ning water. Henry Michelson, 416
WANTED TO SEW—Ladies plain
clothes. Children's clothes, also
gentlemen's and boys' shirts. No.
5 Broadway, west,
FOR SALE—A practically new Oliver
typewriter also nearly new latest
model Smith-Premier typewriter.
Frank E. Funk, First National
bank, Washburn, N. D.
FOR SALE—I have choice of any
trade or course of study given by
the International Correspondence
Schools, for sale at a discount.
Over 200 courses. Will fit you for
higher salary and better position.
Address I C. S., care Tribune.
FOR SALE—Want ad space at one
cent a word for the first insertion
and half a cent a word thereafter,
when paid In advance. They do the
business. Have you tried it?
Anderson, G. W.
Bourbeau, H. J.
Bursch, G. P.
Oorrigan, J. A.
Cullen, Francis M.
Dodge, A. H.
Gunning, H. L.
Horton, Miss Beth
Hibsohmanin, H. J. C.
Hatch, Mrs. S. A.
Jackson, John S.
Johnson, Jas. P.
Kenmett J. G.
Layne, E. J.
Lewis, Jars. Jennie
Lewis, Mrs. J. H.
Mickens, C. W.
Melburn, Miss Clara
NaMan, J. A.
Nelson, F. R.
Norton, F. R.
Osterberg, C. W.
Sohoettler, W. L.
Sherrif, Lawrence E.
Schell, J. E.
Sangren, E. J.
Stanley, E. L.
Sutliff, Mrs. Flossie
This list will be held two weeks.
When calling please say advertised.
AGATHA G. PETERSON, P. M.
"She's of a very cheerful disposition.
Tea. indeed. She even sings while
washing dishea."-Detroit Free
M8MAB A DAILY TPJBUN1
Hew It Has Boon Defined and Some
Folks Who Never Triod It.
What is laughter? An American hu
morist has called it "an undignified
widening of the human mouth, accom
panied by a noise resembling a cough
in the effort' to avoid swallowing a
"Laughter," says Professor Sir
Charles Bell, 'is a convulsive action of
the diaphragm. In this state the per
son draws a full breath and throws it
out in interrupted short and audible
cachlnnations. This convulsion of the
diaphragm is the principal part of the
physical manifestation of laughter.
"But there are several accessories,
especially the sharp vocal utterance
arising from the violent tension of the
larynx and the expression of the fea
tures, this being a more intense form
of the smile. In extreme cases the
eyes are moistened by the effusion
from the lachrymal glands."
There are some people who cannot
laugh, who are wholly unable to enjoy
either the physical or the mental lux
ury of a laugh. Thus it was said of
William III. that he Was utterly at a
loss to understand what could be got
out of laughter except loss of dignity.
There are many persons in history
who have been, according to common
report, incapable of laughter. Queen
Mary I.. John Knox. Robespierre and
Maltke are examples. The Iron Duke
himself rarely, if ever, went beyond a
A Story Thoy Toll of Strauss' Ability
as a Conductor.
"The late Thomas Wentworth Hig
ginuon," said a Harvard instructor,
"loved music, but not the extremely
technical music of Richard Strauss.
Ravel and others of that type.
"Concerning Strauss and his bang
ing, crashing music. Colonel Higgin
son used to tell a story.
"He said that Strauss went one sum
mer on a hunting trip in the moun
tains. It chanced that on a certain
afternoon a terrific thunderstorm de
scended on the hunting party. Amid
earsplitting thunder and blinding light
ning, amid deluges of rain whipped by
a roaring wind, the huntsmen all
"Where, though, was Strauss?
"Three friends set out in alarm to
look for him. They feared that In the
wild chaos of the storm he had fallen
down a precipice. After a long while
they found him. They found him do
ing—what do you suppose?
"Strauss stood bareheaded on the
summit of a lofty crag. The light
ning played about him In vivid violet
flashes the rain deluged him the
thunder rolled and rumbled around
him the roaring wind flapped his coat
tails about bis head, and the musician,
a ramrod in bis hand, was busily en
gaged on his high crag in conducting
the thunderstorm!"—Washington Star.
Wanted—Two Good Murderers.
Some curious letters passed between
Garrlck and a man named Stone. Tbe
latter was employed to get recruits for
the low parts of tbe drama, and
night be wrote to Garrlck, "Sir, tbe
bishop of Winchester is getting drunk
at tbe Bear and swears be will not
At first sight this seems peculiar con
duct for a bishop, but it should be ex
plained that the communication only
refers to the man engaged to take that
character In the play of "Henry VIII."
On another occasion Garrlck wrote
to Stone: "If you can get me two good
murderers I will pay you handsomely,
particularly the spouting fellow who
keeps the apple stall on Tower hill.
The cut In his face Is just the thing.
Pick me up an alderman or two for
'Richard' if you can, and I have no ob
jection to treat with you for a comely
"Is your father in?" the man with
the valise asked.
"No," the boy at tbe front door said,
"he's away somewhere breakin' a year
"Is your mother in?"
*'No she's out In the barn breakin*
an old hen of settin'."
"You have an older brother, haven't
"Yes. but he's layln* down upstairs
tryin' to break up a cold."
"Well, can't I sell you some patent
"Me? No I'm broke."-Chicago Trib
"What a strangely interesting face
your friend the poet has," gurgled the
maiden of. forty. "It seems to possess
all the elements of happiness and sor
row, each struggling for supremacy."
"Yes, he looks to me like a man who
was married and didn't know it,''
growled the cynical bachelor.—Phila
"I'd give anything almost if I had
Mrs. Toner's savoir falre."
"I think it much more patriotic to
own an American made car.**—Bir
Like Unto It
"Love thy neighbor as thyself and
also atop talking about yourself now
and then and-say a few kind words
about him.-Norfolk Ledger Dispatch.
"The man who makes such an alle
gation against me is a reptile."
"Well, naturally he is an allegator."
Ignorance Is tbe primary source of
all misery and vice.-Cousin.
of the United States
Office, Webb and Cook Block.
Go to the Florentine Hair«
Dressing Parlors. Rooms 1 and I 4
Tribune Building. Telephone
O. W. WOLBERT
Agency Manager for Western
Office In Webb Block f»hone.580
BISMARCK, N. DAK.
Live Agent Wanted in Every Town
Andrew Miller W. P. Costello
MILLER A COSTELLO
Attorneys at Law.
City National Bank Bulldtng
BISMARCK. N. D.
Has removed his
to 514 Broadway where he
will be pleased to welcome
his old and new customers
ENGLAND Auto Line
GEORGE GARDNER, Prop.
Operated in Connection with
Hotel Gardner, of
New England and
Leaves Dickinson, 9 a.m. and
4 p. m.
Leaves New England 12
noon, and 6:30 p. m.
$2.00 Per Day House
Headquarters for Commer
A teacher in an uptown school was
giving her small charges a lesson in
politeness the other day.
"Now. when." said she. "should yon
say 'Excuse me. please?'"
There was a moment's silence, then
a very small boy put up his hand.
"Please, ma'am, you should say 'Ex
cuse me. please.' when you sneeze at
th* table aud don't turn sway you!
bead quick enough."—Cleveland Plais
Fish and Brain.
The saying that fish is the best brain
food comes of an old long tongue
windbag years ago saying: "Thought
is impossible without phosphorous."
So a Swiss chemist, knowing that fish
contained phosphorous, put two and
two together, and brought forth a say
ing that will never die.
When tho Guitar Arrived.
The advent of the English guitar In
the eighteenth century caused the dis
appearance of bandores, poliphants and
similar wire strung instruments, or.
rather, it supplanted them. for. owing
to tbe use of fingers, the English guitar
though smaller, could be used for ac
companying tbe voice as well as fot
solo performances. Tbe instrument,
which had a decorative appearance, is
frequently depicted in the portraiture
of the eighteenth century. It was
made In various sizes, two of the
smaller "to be managed by young
ladles from seven to ten years of age.,
the other by ladies of ten and up
The best preparation for the future
Is the present well seen to. tbe last
duty well done.
I I I I I I I I I I
Professional and Busines
THE BURLEIGH COUNTY AB
Legal Abstracters tor Burleigh
County. Under Bond of $10,000
CITY NATIONAL BANK BLK.
CITY NATIONAL BANK BLK.
B. E. JONE8,
New York Life Insurance Co.
Write for particulars concern
CITY NATIONAL BANK Bid*
Bismarck, N. D.,
The Commercial Club hare
secured the Agricultural Expo
sition, and will do their part
Are we doing ours? For the
success of the enterprise we
must all pull together. Let us
work for the welfare of Bis
marck, Burleigh county, and
Yours for assistance,
W. E. RUNEY,
P. E. BYRNB,
Official Abstractor of Titles ta
Bismarck, N. O.
First national Bank,
Blsn». ck, N. D.
THEY COME HERE.
People who know the best,
bring their shoe repairing here.
Our trade is steadily growing,
because shoe repairing here is
right Our work brings custom-
ers back again.
CARL JUHNKE 8HOE 8TORE,
Slattery, Gunn & Co.
Wholesale and Retail
Coal, Wood, Ice
nird and Broadway
BISMARCK, N. D.
LicensedEmbalmer In Charge
Day Phone SO
Night Phone 543R or 163
CHAS. 6RIFFEE, Prip.
Best and Fastest Seivice
in the City
Same as Hack Lines
Pho— WO. Day or.Mgfct
BISMARCK LODGE, No. 5, A. P. ft A.
M. Meets first and third Mon
days in each month at Masonic
hall. A. P. Lenhart, W. J. A.
TANCRBD COMMANDRY NO. 1. Bur*
Finney, E. G. W. Wolbert, Re
corder regular meeting first and
third Thursday of each mosth.
O. E. S.
BISMARCK CHAPTER, No. 11, meets
first and third Fridays in each
month at Masonic hall. Mrs. Grace
French, W. M. Mrs. Gertrude Mil
KNIGHTS OF PYTHIAS.
ST. ELMO LODGE, No. 4. Meets
each Wednesday evening at K. P.
hall. E. M. Thompson, C. L.
Thompson, K. of R. & S.
LINCOLN TEMPLE, No. !». Meets
second and fourth Thursdays each
month at K. P. hall. Mrs. 2. L.
Vlgness, M. E. C„ Mrs. Nellie Er
arts, M. of R. ft c.
L. O. O. M.
BISMARCK LODGE NQ. 14.—Loyal
Order of Moose. Regular meetings
every first and third Monday even
ings of each month. Charles Fish
er, dictator S. E. Register, secre
tary. Visiting members welcome.
M. W. A.
BISMARCK CAMP, No. 1164. M. W.
A. Meets tie. second and fourth
Tuesdays in each month. Luther
Hook, V. p. W. F. Jones Clerk.
A FPATERNAL, LIFE AND ACCI
dent Insurance organization. Meets
the fourth Tuesday in each month
In the K. P. bill. J. M. Belk,
foreman Elsie McDonald, master
of accounts Elizabeth Belk, cor
I. O. O. F.
CAPITAL CITY LODGE No. 2. meets
every Thursday evening at Odd Fel
lows' hall. O. H. Benson, N. G.,
Aug. Watz, V. G., Clough, sec
retary, Dell B. Shaw, treasurer,
NICHOLSON LODGE, No. 40. Meets
the first and third Wednesdays la
each month in Odd Fellows hall
Elizabeth Belk, N. G. Mrs. Nellie
M. B. A.
M. B. A. Meets second and fourth
Wednesday of month at Odd FeL
lews hall. Grant Marsh, president
George A. LaLone, secretary.
ST. CLEMENS COURT, 747.
CATHOLIC ORDER OF FOREST
ers. Meets every Jrst Wednesday
at 8 p. m., and every fourth Sun
day at 2 p. m. All visiting mem
bers Invited. F. Jaszkowlak, C.
R. Anton Beer, R. S.
COMMERCIAL CLUB OF BISMARCK
Regular meeting of club member
ship the first Tuesday In each
month regular meeting of board of
directors be first Friday of each
month, at Commercial club rooms,
Third street. Geo. A. Welch, presi
dent A. B. Welch, secretary.
UNITED BROTHERHOOD OT CAR
penters and Joiners, No. 1118.
Meets every Thursday evening at
Kuntz's hall. All brothers cordL
ally invited to meet with us. C.
B. French, president John Danrot,
treasurer W. G. Gorsuch, secretary.
Fred Anderson, financial secretary.
TYPOGRAPHICAL UNION NO. 140.
Meets first Sunday in each month
at S p. m. Gus Syvertson, presi
dent H. C. Hlnes, secretary.
CAPITAL CITY HOMESTEAD, No.
300. Meets second and fourth Fri
days of the month at I. O. O. F.
hall at 8 p. m. John. A. Larvau,
president J. C. Whitted, secretary.
A. U. W.
BISMARCK LODGE, No. 120. Meets
the first and third Tuesdays at
Baker Hall at 8 o'clock. C. T.
•Vyncoop, M. W. Bradley C. Marks,
G. A. R.
JAMES B. MJPHERSON POST, No.
2, Department of Nortl Dakota
Grand Army of the Republic. Meets
at their rooms in the Armory on
the .*econd and fourth Thursdays
of each month. John W. Millett,
commander' A. D. Cordner, adju
K. O. T. M. Meets every first and
third Thursday of each month at
8 o'clock p. m., at I. O. O. F. halt
Visiting members cordially invited
D. C. Ramp, commander Erie*
Erickson, record keeper.
I. O. OF F.
COURT BISMARCK, No. 887. Meets
every fourth Thursday In eac
month at Odd Fellows hall. JoLa
Yegen, C. It. R. D. Hoskins, R. S.
I. W. Healy, F. S.
B. P. O. E. No. lit* meat at Etta*
hall first and third Fridays of tfca
month. Visiting brotherr welcome.
R. L. Best, B. R. Carl Pederaoo,
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