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THE DAILY ARDMOnEITE. Ardmore, Sunday, June 3, 1900. NEWSPAPER CHAFF. A rclirr Tnytiig a visit to her old Uionu tm yours Inter, askinl her crack ' skjImiAbt: "WVII. Andrew how much do xnx rnmemher of all my lessons?" "Ah. iiia'an thou, never a word." "(Mi. Andrew. Andrew! And have yaa eWxtitieu all about the sun, the rains nml th stars, the day and nfcbt. nnd the seasons?" "Ok. tH, ma'am! I do remamlwr now. umI jrou Met them on the mImmI jrrxm tnhle and Mars was a red Kfluu)brr7 and 1 ,nte liltn." -lfix J ' 'Owing the War of the Ilelelllon, xvhnn Jl bennme tiecossary to draft inv- Hot liio army, a recruiting offl rwv IluVor Menrs by name, wont to un IuIjjiJ off the coast of Malno call ! land's Island. It claimed to be u An flits lont neored tho shore n tall linwMjr fuinalo, the mother of suvonil Hlalvai BoBH, appealed on the rocks, smi) aa thu oftlcer set foot on shore ut rr tit it ilumnnded his business. "Mitv men for Undo Sam," ho an .HWMVd. flhn Jxamcdlately began to pelt him vrltlt 'til;;, ,'liiud potatoes, and thoy .-an rn fast and Xurlously that he mtim iHillell to Hue to thu boat and xnvt dmw :ih fust as polblo. Dir. .Mi-nrs, when a little uxclted, jrtuliifnli Oittdly. ItelatliiK the ox pur fejim, lie uirdec It with: "G-g-glve her li7jHvj))tal(iei o-oiioiikIi, n-a-n-aiul rtirtin4icil t-t-t-toke lll-ill-Mchiiiuiid. lkusiu) Jlernld. m m m 9 TUr.'Ogtu. "blue-blood" from Vlr Klnfcu had recntly moved In Wash Aactoov M-herv he purchased a hand uantj on a fashionable itmt; Mnt. tut la often the case In that city, HitiaX fraini' houses were In (dose pmSwlty, and fnim these houses sumnmu little urchins Issued and plMsiul on the imveinent near his )TJ11 IViverly Ogle, aged six, watch ail & children longingly. Ouv day .Id fsdhor mw him playlw; with one irf tha dlrllimt of those little boys. Ho i3ill.il Uk' child to him. '' "ih I not forbid your playing with tJwvr. ohlldronf said ho sternly to lils yi.w. y3A. fmher, you did; but Ilobblu Is iv Vlrnlnn; you unld bad boys." Mr. 'Oglo wns .silenced. Llppln J ' " ' 's ' " "Tluw do Aldrlch and his friends ilrl oror this?" was nsked of Son sriur JJoIlbvr whon tho Allison amend incut: tras road. "I really don't 1txatw replied tho Junior sonntor from firwa. "I nupposo thoy Xool about llko .Iuj-v Ilalibnrd of our stiito tho morn Jn;; uJLttr Cummlus boat him In tho Cottar KanWlK convention. Hubbard suctt down early and sought a place of. ntTreshniont. The barkeeper sym tlirUcully usked him what ho would risw, thinking to choor him up a lit tin. 'All I want this morning,' said ihir Jad$i ratofully, " la a glass of Ik water und a fow kind words.'". Karouui.,ClUy Star. 'Jif,"r. 'Tvtii nothing llko a sonso of hit- SMirJ said Hoar Admiral Uuhler nt JW'jaaWc, VAy. "In u woman, In it Bid -j)sr..la':i mil v, r. n clor ;, n svnro jt U-mihi' 1 jx holji and a blosslug rJiroicsh Ufa "At tlui tamo time, ovon n boiibo of Jhnwwrumy oxlst In excess. I, for my jur), abinldn't enro to huvo so groat n iiiuj?ilnT .humor as a Ilrltlsh Boldlnr I unci Tii-ard aljout. '"This ynhllor was ordoroil to bj ttrtsKiy. '3Airtnii tho Hogging ho laugh u& Kaliniially Tho lash wns laid on all fij-t.'hn.raer, but undor the rain of CjIowb tha Mildlor laughod llko u mnu sit an It J I. J)avls farce. "4h:ii 1110 you IuubIiIiik at?' tho sarPHJUji lnnlly naked. "Ihj, tho soldlor chucklod, 'I'm lite vn-unj man.'" Kansas City Star. . j Tv ct many men woro ns ready In svMvaa wan thu Into Patrick Collins, jmowW .Huston. At tho vory qpon' of Iifci mayoralty came flill proofi sC tiiii. m 7KIu:r irao n knock at the door tif On: w.ynlclpal chief excutlvo's ottlco niiH lttxushjuso to .Mr, Collins "Comq fn" entered a diminutive .messenger, Xh. "cuso me,"" Bald ho, In n tone that: snsgestcd both dlsappoltltuiontj nai ijiolosy; "I wns looklu' for do" TTP.ttJVli' "Wen. I'm Ulr. Collins." replied tho oyHAi nuawsurlngly. "Xtnta Ximnht you was short?" tan-3:3t-U Aio other. Ami Ills Honor roplled. "you're mjili: xisht. Can you lond me llvo?" .l.lJriAarott's. - . . Ms Upmoru cropt out of bed, grop stf. tas xry to'tho telephone, and call ii 11? ttw nnitral ofllce, "Hello! 'Iw said, In a low voico. "JHuxur send word to tho t.eareBt pnllcu station that hero Is a burglar Ix. uvr ouso, If they will nmko a quick run they can catch ban My house Is No. 213 " There was a pause of half a mlntt'c and then it gruff voice finished tlu nit sage In this wise: "Hello, central! Yotise Hain't call up de cops. l)e burglar has got Av (ruy wot owns tils Hlleban covered wit a gun, an' he'll be out o hep' wit' de ewag In about 'leren -cotids lly, by, sis." Kansas City Times Lieutenant I tern n of the DrnU descrlb! at a dinner In New YorkR.i ISngllett millionaire: "TiiU man," lie wld, "never earned a penny In Ills life. He never lacked a penny. Yet he is oaretul of ev ( ery shilling as ttiottgn 11 was 111s last. "I once dined with him, and. ns It was raining whon I came to go, I hesitated n little while Iwfore tho umbrella rnok In tho hall. "'1 hate," I sld, 'to start out la this rnln.' 'Then I laid my hand on an urn brella. "I don't like, cither.' 1 went on, 'to borrow your 'umbrella.' "Tho millionaire soiled upon mj handsomo malacca walking stick. "'Ohv take It,' ho said heartily. 'Tako It.' my doar fellow, and I'll keep this Btlck as security." llos ton Tost. Unknown Friends. Thoro are manieople who lmvo used Chamberlain's Colic, Cholera and Diarrhoea Homedy with splendid ro sultH, but who are unknown because they have hesitated about giving a testimonial of their experience fo publication. These people, however, arc none the lees friends of this rem edy. Thoy lmve done much toward making It a household word by their personnl recommendations to friends and neighbors. It is a good me.llclne to have In the home and wldoiy known for Its cures of diarrhoea and at foms of bowel trounlr. For sale by P. J. rtamsey, W fl. Frame, Ardmore Drug Co., Homier & Ilonnor. PACKING HOUSE METHODS Human Flesh Rendered In Caldrons Sent Out at Lard. Chicago, III., June 1. Tho Ilwu ! llorold prints tho following tlnfa morning. Corroboration of stories that mon hnvo fallen Into tho rondorlng cal drons at tho stock yards and tholr llesh has been cotivortod Into lard camo today. A. M. Slmfiions, who for moro than threo yearn wns tho agent of ' tho Chicago Hurenu of Charitlos at Its stock yards station, furnished tho continuation of tho story told by Up ton Slnclnlr In "Tho Junglo" and others. The cases thnt canto directly tttidor tho notice woto thoso of a boy 10 years old and tho child's father In sponklng of tho cases today ho said ho could not romombor the name, though ho had mado a record of It at tho tlmo, and thoso records nro still In tho otllco of tho Bureau of Char ItlOS, --" . 1-'." ! "Tho boy, who carried his father's dlnnor to him every day," ho said, "wont too near ono of tho stonm cal drons and his father, waiting for him, hoard his doath scronm as ho slipped anil foil headlong Into tho scalding steam. "The fathor mado frantic efforts to get to tho boy and his follow workmen did all In their power, but It was ten mluutos boforo tho steam could bo shut off, und by thnt tlmo nothing wna lott of tho boy but tho bonbs. "It must hnvo been a hnuntlng fooling that somehow ho might see his boy's face in tho stroma that brought tho fathor too 11 oar tho edgo of tho vat, but ono day, only a fow works aftor tho boy's doath his folios workmen snw him tumbling Into tho nnmo vat. Thoro was no special effort made to got him out nml whon, aftor Hourly half un hour, examination was mado thoro wus not n trnco of him ovon tho bones had boon dissolved. J "Tho llciih of this man and of thu boy wont on with tho rondorod meat lu tho caldron and In duo tlmu was placed In buckets nnd sold on tho market." Wo have paints, enamels, etc., In many Blmdoa for all kinds of house hold Jobs. They aro Inexpensive, easy to npply nnd will Improvo thing! greutly. 3 F. J. RAMSEY, Druggist. Q. C. & 8. F., Ry Excursions. Special excursion to Mexico City, Mux., Sept. 3rd to 14th. Rate 3G. National Educational Association Convention, San Pranclsco, Cal., Juno 25th to July 7th. Rato $52. Illennlnl Meeting General Federa tion of Women's clubs, St. Paul, Minn., May 2Cth, 28th, 29th and 30Ui Rato I28.C0. ' Special excursion to Mexico City, Mex., Juno 25 to July 7th. Rato $38. W. A. DASHIELL. Ticket Agent. 15, 10 and 20 conpoa books at this office. Dizzy Spells ffi and backache., that tired feeling, absence of appetite, and extreme nervousneM that so frequently afflict you, mean that you aro bilious, mil-... 1. 1 oy a badly disordered or inactive ltvcr. Dr. Caldwell's (tajcattvt) Syrup Pepsin acts Instantly and effectively on the liver reinvigoratcs and strengthens it and restores it to perfect condition, The remarkable virtuo of this wonder (ul remedy has been demonstrated In thousands of instances, and it will work wonders in cleansing and setting your whole system aright. Its good effects are permanent. DR. CALDWELL'S SYRUP PEPSI can be obtained in both dollar and ha dollar sizes from all druggists. Your money will be refunded it docs not benefit you. Ynur poital card t eiuel will brtnir br rt mall our n-r booklet. "DR. CA1.1)VHI, HOOK OP WONDRKS" nml (rt tatnple Ihota who hava ntvtr tried (tilt wotxl remedy. Wtlie today. PEPSIN SYRUP CO. Montlcollo. Illinois LIVESTOCK MARKET. Kansas City, Mo.. June 2. (Spe cial.) Receipts In the ' riiarnntlue division tills week so far are 173 cars, against 00 for the same ertod last week. Receipts have been Mailt for some time and the quality has not beni good as It was. Hulk of the offerings are grass cattle which sell very well. The ran last week came In nearly all on Monday nnd Tues day. The market was depressed here on those by a heavy run nt Chicago Monday nml a heavy run hero. Hulk of the offerings lu both divisions hnvo boon received the llrst three days of each week for the imst two or three weeks. Tho run In tho (iiinrnntlno division today Is 500 cattle. Top steers Bold at $I.S0, which Is tho top for tho week bo far. Hulk of tho offerlngB rnugu from $1 to $1.45. Grass cattle sold up to $1.15 but tho quality was not very good. No cows or calvos "wore Included In the receipts to speak of. Calves made $5.60, and cows are quotnblo at $2.50 to $1, bulls ut $2.05 to $3.75, veals at $1. to $C, stock cows and hollers nt $2.25 to $3.25. Light runs ure oxpectcd for the future with no change lu the mnrkut to speak of, excepting steady. IIor rccolpts havo beon llboral for the past mouth, hut In splto of this the packers have had to ship In hogs to fill tholr ordot'B. Tho market last vsek declined llrst three days, but closed tho week showing 110 less. The market openod Monday n little lovror, but has wont up to tho high notch' of tho Boason ngaln. Top to day $5.50, same ns yosterdny, but tho bulk of tho hogs nro soiling 6 cents lower today. Run today 12,000, bulk of the hogs selling nt $0.27 1-2 to $0.10, light weights up to $0,271-2. ; Sheep rcylnts have beca exced ugly light for some tlmo, hut nil 0! tho fed stuff has been marketed with the exception of 11 fow scattering drovos. Tho run from now on will como mainly from Tcxatis and the Southwest, nnd the supply from that territory will not bo as hoavy this yonr ns last. Tho run today Is C5O0, market a little lower on Bhocp. lambs steady. Hulk of tho lambs range from $C to $7.45, shorn Iambi up to $0.01). Toxnu grass wethers to day nt $5.00, und these prices have boon tho rulo for tho past twj 0 tl'ieo days on thU rluss. Light tuns nro looked for until tho heavy Wos lorn movement starts und Htroi.s nuiikots will mlo In tho monntlme. J. A RICKART. Live Stock Corrospondo.v. Our laundry Is open for ono hour Sunday morning from 8 to 9 for tnu accommodation of call bundles. 6tf NEW STEAM LAUNDRY. FRISCO EXCURSIONS. Eureka Springs and return. On sale dally from Feb. 1st Rato, $12.60, re tun limit 90 days. Rate 117.50, re turn limit 6 montbB. Sulphur Springs, I, T and rotorn. On sale dally from March lsL Rate $2,60, roturn limit 90 days. Saint Paul, 'Minn., Biennial Meet Ing, General Federation of Women's ClubB, May 30 to Juno 7th. Rato, ono way fare plus $2 for round trip. Dates of sale, May 26, 28, 29 and 30th. Re turn limit, Juno 9th. , W. A. DASHIEIib, Agent. J. W. MARINO,' T. P. A. Sherman TexiS. Caution books. f5. tin nnd I?n. at this offlco. . ' TIME TABLE. Frisco. Eastbonnd No. 42 leaves 6:06 a. r No. 44 loaves 12:60 p. m Westbound No, 43 arrives i-.OS a. m No, 41 arrives 7:35 p. m Choctaw-Rock laland. Eastbound No. 84 (local)leavci 7:00 a. m No 10 leaves .2:40 p. m Westbound No. 9 arrives 1:10 p. u No. S3 (local) arrives 6:30 p. tn Santa Fe. Southbound No. 6 4:03 a. ru No. 17 4:20 a. m No 19 12:36 p. m Northbound No. 6 12:50 a. m No. 18 11:55 a. m No. 20. . 5:35 p. tn. Nos. 6, 6, 19 and 20 are local trains wbllo Nos. 17 and 18 stop at the imtU rr ttntlon onlr nu liolnn ftsRKe LAWYERS. W. P. Oavts. W. F. Freeman. Ollle Anderton. DAVIS, FREEMAN A ANDERTON. Laywert. Rooms 4 and 5 Now Dulldlng West of Court House. Phono 604. Ardmore, I. T. WM. B. MATTHEWS. Attorney at Law. . w Kruno mn vmiru niiiiF. nu. ireifl Court, Court of Clalmn. ami all thr ror iicni jpara in u.B (loner. I Land OHlci.. ........ . .. ..i-rw.u biiukir.n autliuilinu Ulnillin m i.r'viaiij One at thu idltor of "Matthew A Con- ITMV'kfllli.dB ( 1i.II....MI..m ...... Matthew a' Forma of I'leadlm.'." lite. r. . - . ... r.u.itir m 11111 I'HI'er. h 0Jl?,VJ: I12? Y,r Avonue,Vahlnif- CipL J. W. Elllt. W. D. Halfhlll. ELLIS at HALFHILL. Rooms 21 nnd 22, Ilomestoad Hldg., Civil and Indian builness oxcluso- ivoly. MUSKOOEE, I NO. TER. W. D. Johnson L. S. Dolman, JOHNSON A. DOLMAN. Attcrneys t Law. Ardmore, I. T. WILLIAM W. WRIQHT (Iteirtitered Allorner.l (Formcrir with D.twpm rnmnlolnnl Contests, Citizenship Cases and othir uiaucrs WJioro mo interior Dc- nnrtmnnt. T7tp1hIvIv Rooms 407 and 8, Corcoran" building- Wasnlngton, D. C. Cuai.J. KarrL Cut: 11 Msiillai Compiler "Indian Actlte Law a and Treatlea" Conrt I'ractltloner KAPPLER 4 MERILLAT Attorneys and Countelors-at-Law. I'raotlco before all Courtii Oonirreaa, U01 vrnment Uepartmentt tad Commtailona Indian oaaea a apeelaltr. Office, IJond bldir. Waitalnstoa. D PHYSICIANS. K.r.TOH KKLI.KU.M.l), U, II, UENUY. M.D. Uei.rbontll nai, I'bont 7b OfCoe Pnoue lit V von KELLER & HENRY Physicians and Surgeons. Sje. Kar Noaa and Throat Hpeulallila. Brxtotaolea Ure Uliiiei aoouratelr flllad Office orar Bonner A nonnsr'a, Hooma I lot R. D. Mooro J. h. Hurgrave lies, l'aono .13. Res. Phone 519 ODlc0 Vhoao 499, MOORE A. HARGRAVit. ' Physicians and 8urneons. Offlco In Kronsloy Building error Ilotchkiss Jowolry Storo. Special attention to treatment ot plica and diseases or women. Drl. J. P. FANN, ''--I, Dentiit, Over Hall & Hllllg,. Dr. W. H. nnlie. Dr. E. J. Woodard. ENLOE A. WOODARD, DENTIS'I' Offices tn Ardmoro nnd Marietta. DR. C. L. McCANN. Offlco: Stong Building, over Hall & Hlllls. Telephones: Offlco 682; rosldcnce 683. Q. E. GOODWIN, M. D. (Offlao over Hall & Hlllls) Phonos Offlco 349; resldenco 307 DR. PRI-IP STEPHENS Ofllce Randol building. ..Offlco phono 572. Residence 428... DR. M. VADEN Physician and Surgeon. Offlco hours from 8 to 12 and 2 to 4 and 7 to 9.. Offlco Noblo '. ulldtng. Offlco phono 68; residence 71. J, L. WILSON. FREIGHT TRANSFER AND DAGOAQE LINE. Offlco at American Restaurant, Resldenco phone 72. Offlco phone 71 iiiijui-a j yy: $5 discount on all scholarships sold In Solvldgo UuBiness College, from now till Juno 4. 25-8 Wo taavo a Dig lino ot Quick Meal gasollno stoves to select from. D1VEN8, COnilN & FRENBLHY. ELKS meet in DENVER IN JULY RATE ONE FARE for thl ROUND TRIP Scllinji July 13-14-15. Limit Aug. 20 VIA i SUMMER IN COLORADO Many people put aside all thought of an outing in Colorado because they are accustomed to consider this greatest of American playgrounds as one of those impossible things beyond their means. Time was when a visit to the "top of the Continent" was a great luxury, as high in price as in altitude, but not so tod a. You can spend tho Suminor or n part of the Summer in Colorado and live as reasonably ns you do at homo, and thu quick sorvleo and low tourist nnd excursion rates afforded via Hock Island lines bring the Rockies with in your easy reach. Our ft mm 1 in ! mWMiyiLl CE0''LEE' J. 5. McNALLYi flKAliilUi) Ccn, Pa" Aiu d,v p Aitt j HRl L,,,,e ntK' ArK OKIa. City. H--H- -W"fr H Many Delightful Summer ..Resort.. In the "Land of the Slly" and "Sapphire Country," East Tennessee, Western N. Carolina and Virginia Are reached via tho Southern Railway with Convenient Schedules und Sleeping Car Servlco. For Information lUirartllnir Reorta, Ratei, Hchedulet soil r)ecrllllT Literature, Call on or Writs M. H. BONE, Western Pass. A(t., 410 Scollard Building, Pallas, Texas. THE OFFICIAL ROUTE On Another Large Occassion is the Old Reliable W The Sign of Louisville, Ry., ACCOUNT HOME COMING WEEK FOR KENTUCKIANS Tbartlraniiett Event to tho Ulatorr of the Ilia. (Iran State Oho Faro Pins 2.00 for tho Round Trip, Dates of sale," Juno 11, 12 and 18, limited for roturn thirty pays from dato of sale. Side Trip Tickets, Louisville to nil points in Ken tucky at rato of ono faro plus 25 cents. Stop over at Mammoth Cavo if Desired Special through. Service June 11 Clean up to-dato Chair Cars and Pullman Sleepers without change- to LDuisvillo Tho party will bo undor tho per.son ui supervision of an ablo Cotton Belt representative. .'w?,",,..,!n,,,.ivVlT,h.e,'e"tP,,l,,'ce,,,vl,laellieOra .oetlon lhl year ant ttie Cotton llelt In tliobodt roaa to rake. . Jr Cll on i.nraic.nt or aililrem either ot the uuilerslitned for full Information recarUlui;!rate, cheilule,ootof trip, etc. ". ivf iniorraaiou D, M, MOUOA N.T. P. A . Ft. Worth, Tex. JOHN Y, LKIIANE. O. F. .t V A. Tyler, Texaa. For further information nsk Santa Fo Agent or address W. S. KEEK AN, G. P. A., G.C. $ S.F. GALVESTON. -M-t-t-f-i-l. THIS SUMMER Booklets and Folders give the whole story; write today. ! -J" Good Service" JUNE 13 to if, W06 OU8 HOOVER, T. P. A.. Waco, Tea. U. C. FYKE, A O. P. P. A Tyler, Texa. s D E2B