The herald. [microfilm reel], July 24, 1898, Page 18, Image 18

About The herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1893-1900

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18
The Herald
THE HERALD PUBLISHING COMPANY
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SUNDAY, JULY »4. IM»K.
WHERE THE BLAME RESTS
In all Southern California there may
not be found a single defender or apolo
gist for the attitude of the administra-j
tlon toward the San Pedro harbor im
provement. No Republican leader or
Republican newspaper has ventured an
explanation of the remarkable compla
cency with which the president of the
United States has witnessed the practi
cal nullification of a solemn act of con
gress by a member of his own political
household, without objection or protest
upon his part. Nor can it be urged in
extenuation or mitigation that he has
not been perfectly familiar with the facts
or that the cares and responsibilities im
posed by the war have prevented a prop
er consideration of them. Secretary Al
ger's alliance with the Huntington Inter
est, antagonistic to that of this whole
section, was notorious long before hos
tilities began, and promised to constitute
a national scandal. Senators and mem
bers of congress from California, repre
senting all shades of political belief, had
laid the shameful facts before the execu
tive. The technicalities of the law,
adroitly invoked by the secretary of war
in furtherance of his aims, had been suc
cessively swept aside as inconsequential
and irrelevant by two attorney generals
of the United States, but a halt was not
called until the strongest representa
tions were made to the executive that the
further exploitation of the illegal and
unwarranted opposition of a Republican
cabinet minister to harbor improvement
on this coast would be at the peril of the
party's supremacy in the forthcoming
congressional elections. It was not until
the leaders and organs of the party
throughout the state united in an appeal
in the interest of the political organiza
tion imperiled that Mr. McKinley took
the alarm and commanded his secretary
to cease his opposition and permit the
law to be enforced.
It is a remarkable circumstance that
Republican newspapers should be con-'
■trained to look upon the withdrawal of
opposition by a cabinet officer to the exe
cution of an act of congress as a greater
triumph than was comprehended in the
recognition by that body of the needs of
this section of a deep-sea harbor, and
yet that is the light In which it is re
garded. Not nearly so formidable was
the objection of the legislative branch of
the government to the appropriation of
three million dollars for this work as was
the subsequent opposition of the execu
tive branch of the same government to
the expenditure of the money. And we
hazard little in the opinion that had Alger
or any other executive officer of the gov
ernment placed similar obstacles in the
■way of the executive of a law affecting
New England or eastern Interests, the
storm of indignation aroused would have
driven the offender from the cabinet, if
not wholly from public life.
In a government like ours there should
be no "powers behind the throne." The
president is chosen to execute the laws.
He is required to take a solemn oath that
he will perform this duty without fear or
favor. He is provided with constitution
al advisers, but he is not compelled to ac
cept their advice. He is morally and le
gally responsible for their acts. When
they are so obviously wise and states
manlike as to command the approval of
the people, he takes the credit. When
they are so extra-officious, unconstitu
tional, illogical and obviously against
public policy, he is justly held responsi
ble. Hence the strictures of the Los An
geles Times, the mouthpiece of the party
tn this section, and the especial champion
of the president, go further than the wai
department—they reach to the very
doors of the White House. It says:
The extraordinary spectacle of a sin
gle private citizen acting as a power be
hind the throne, and preventing the
accomplishment of the just desires of
a large and Important section of the
United Stat"s, is one that is not at all
pleasing for the patriotic American to
contemplat". Still less so Is the spec
tacle which we havr- lati ly seen, of a
high government official tiding this
wealthy citizen by every possible trick
and device to succeed In his nefarious
plans.
The struggle is over, because party
Success was menaced. Opposition ceases,
because partisan interests demand It.
A truce Is declared, because party lead
ers have become alarmed. The presi
dent is aroused only when the party fog
horn is sounded. He yields only when
the lookout cries, "Breakers ahead!"
In view of the facts, undisputed and
Incontrovertible, it Is not strange that
*>«nubiican journals should concede that
it is a situation "that is not at all pleas
ing tor the patriotic American to con
template."
UNNECESSARY NOISES
The average citizen of the United
States has got so accustomed to unneces
sary noises that he really Imagines them I
a necessary part of business. He little J
dreams of the wear and tear these bar- 1
barons and brutal sounds at all hours of
the day and night have on him. The j
physicists tell us thaX our system will, I
if forced to It, adapt Itself to most
any old abuse. However, it is j
only the- fit that will survive.
And as the fit Is not a moral quan- J
Ity, and not, in every instance, the best,
it behooves sensible people to do what
little is in their power to remove imper
fect environments, so that the best will
survive. Mr. David Christie Murray,
in his "The Cockney Columbus." tells us
that he was appalled by the noises in
New York. Listen to him:
The city fairly terrified me. Com
pared with Twenty-third street, our
London Strand Is a garden of sleep.
Such a wonderful sway of li F- -. and a
hurry of coming and going, such a roar
of traffic and clanging of b-Mls.
For the sake of our cockney Columbus'
nerves it is well his fate kept him out of
Los Angeles, if Twenty-third street
makes the Strand seem like a paradise
of slee*p in comparison, then the Strand
is Nirvana compared to Los Angeles.
New York Is a bustling, busy city, and
consequently noisy during business
hours; but after commercial hours the
business streets are as quid as the
tombs. And New York clubs, hotels and
places of public entertainment are dec
orous and far less noisy and boisterous
than are similar places in Paris or Lon
don. The New Yorker, too, has evolved
high enough to know that a door is
meant to be shut, not slammed, and that
hotel and other public places, and corri
dors are aisles to be quietly walked
through, and not avenues for sprinting
in, or other athletic amusements. The
guests of private hotels hold their con
versations in reasonably low tones of
voice, meant for the occupants of tho
room they are in, and not for the neigh
bors in the next block. Sleighbells are
permissible In winter, about two days in
a year, when "the beautiful" covers th?
ground, but never for milk wagons,
baker wagons, etc., In summer. Toot
ing horns through the streets, advertis
ing "Solomon Levies Oreat Fire Sale,"
would drive big Sachem Croker to plug
ging his ears with cotton—or to drink.
Now, Los Angeles is a big. hustling
youngster—one we are all proud of—but
it is altogether too confounded, unneces
sarily noisy. We are too proud of our
kid to let it grow to manhood contract
ing this bad habit. It can and ought to
be squelched. How? Of course the best
way is by individuals teaching them
selves that there are others, and that all
unnecessary noise is a nuisance to one's
neighbor, and to bear in mind that It Is
a good enough rule to do whatever one
pleases so that he does nothing to lm
jure (disturb) his neighbor. The other
method is quicker, but rarely satisfac
tory, namely, for our city parents to
thrash our noisy hawkers and hucksters
into good manners. For the corridor
night rioters there is no remedy too he
roic. Probably the punishment a West
erner suggested to his neighbor, while
witnessing the lynching of a horse thief,
"that it is not half bad enough for him.
sir—he ought to be kicked."
When Schopenhauer dipped his pen
in gal and wrote of women, he was off
his eggs and trying to hatch on nothing:
but the old gentleman, when he pierced
the fifth ribs of his obtuse Teutonic
neighbors for their outrageous noisiness,
was covering a full setting in splendid
style. Schopenhauer says there are a
groat many people not sensitive to noise*
—who smile at such things—but he be
lieves, too, that they are not sensitive
"to argument, or thought, or poetry, or
art—in a word, to any kind of intellectual
influence." Is that true?
Any way, let us have peace.
THE TIDE IN LOCAL AFFAIRS
There Is a growing conviction that
with the coming of peace there will be
something of a revival of industry
throughout the country, that there will
be a loosening of purse strings and a dis
position all around to restore the condi
tions that prevailed in this country prior
to the financial collapse of 18i»3, the de
pressing effects of which had not been
entirely dissipated when hostilities were
opened.
All that was needed to bring about pros
perity was the re-estahllshment of con
fidence, a subtle Influence that is some
times as capricious in returning as in
disappearing. There is perhaps no more
substantial encouragement for the open
ing of the factories and mills today than
there was reason for the closing of them
a few years ago, unless we find it in the
universal weariness with stagnation and
the general desire for a change. Cheer
fulness is the sunshine of commerce and
trade and Industry. Hopefulness Is
both contagious and infectious. It can
easily be made epidemic. Unwise and
impolitic and repressive as are many of
our laws, the determination of a prepon
derance of our people to bring about a
return of prosperity will prove irresisti
ble. We can. if we will, prosper in spite
of adverse legislation, because of the ex
tent and richness and variety of our re
sources. Later, when population be
comes congested, when the waste places
have all been filled, when development
has reached the highest point and compe
tition has been intensified, then will the
hand that is placed upon industry need
to be gloved "with the fur side outside."
It is believed that an era of progress I
and development will follow the ratifica-1
tlon of a peace. It Is thought that capital
will again come out of Its many hiding
places, and seek employment in legltl
; mate undertakings promising fair re
| turns. It is hinted that there will be
something of a revival In railroad build
ing. It Is reasonable to suppose that
the enhanced profits of farming in the
past year will serve to greatly stimulate
. agricultural development. The clearing
off of mortgages on farms throughout
the country has loosened vast sums of
money that have been tied up for years,
which will not long remain idle once
confidence Is measurably restored. The
demand for an enlarged navy is likely to
become Irresistible, and the construction
of It will for years to come make business
brisk In the shipyards, the armor facto
ries, the ordnance works and all collat
eral enterprises. The building ot the Nlc
| aragua canal, almost certain to be un
j dertaken within the year, promises to
i give employment to tens of thousands of
I Idle people. The building up of our mer
chant marine will scarcely await upon
the close of the war. It will be initiated
at once. The spirit of activity and prog-
I toss is abroad, and a gratifying meta-
I morphosis is taking place.
Locally there is much in the situation
and prospects to cheer and encourage.
Southern California, despite all themut
teringfl of the small army of croakers, is
doing well. Its cities and towns are
growing. The people generally are well
to-do and reasonably contented. Los
Angoles is growing apace, and its trad*
is expanding. The clearings of its banks
for the last quarter, compared with th>
same period last year, show an increase
exceeding 20 per cent. The population is
being steadily augmented. The build
ing trades are unusually active. Pine
blocks are being added to the business
section, and residences are multiplying
In all directions. Streets are being Im
proved, unsightly obstructions are being
removed, sanitary considerations are not
being neglected, and sen work will be
gin upon subways long needed to remove
the congestion of the principal thorough
faros, and bring outlying sections into
closer communication. Our park system
Is being extended, and the breathing
places of the people are multiplied and
beautified. The building of the San Pedro
breakwater will give employment to a
large number of men. and a considerable
portion of tho sums to be disbursed In
that undertaking will speedily get into
I the local circulation.
As a community we shall profit by all
of these things without an effort. We
shall get what falls in our lap without
cost. But should we be content with
that? Should we not reach out our
hands for more? Should we not spread
out our municipal apron with the view of
securing all that is to be had? Is It not a
good time for the Initiation, by the sev
eral commercial bodies of the city of a
comprehensive system of advertising of
the matchless resources of Southern Cal
ifornia in general and Los Angeles coun
ty In particular? The lack of necessary
funds may not be urged against such a
policy. A sum equal to that annually
contributed to the fiesta pageants would
go a long way toward bringing the beau
ties and the advantages and the unique
attractions of this section to the atten
tion of the country. Our people are lib
eral and public spirited, and we believe
they will cheerfully respond to any and
all reasonable demands that may be
made upon them In furtherance of move
ments having for their object the attrac
tion to this locality of men of brain,
brawn, muscle and money.
Let us. therefore, without any unneces
sary delay, get in touch with the spirit
of enterprise that once again begins to
characterize the people of the entire
country.
LOS ANGELES IN FAVOR
At the recent meeting of the National
Educational association at Washington,
to decide between the rival claimant?
for the nfxt session, but five minutes
was allowed each advocate to present
the allurements of his locality. That
might do for some cities, but Mr. Foshay
was compelled to put his thoughts
through a concentrator in order to fairly
present the attractions of Los Angeles
within the time limit. Salt Lake. Port
land ar.d Tao.ima were the principal con
testarots, in the order named, but our
city obtained nearly half of all the votes
cast, illustrating either the convincing
eloquence of its advocate or the superior
advantages of his client—probably bath.
He, at all events, succeeded in making it
appear that Los Angeles is a place whore
people never die—where they simply lie
down to 6leep in one heaven and wake
up In another—and with that sort of a
presentation, of course, great enthusiasm
was aroused.
It Is likely that the next session of the
convention will be largely ait bended, pro
vided the railroads shall make satisfac
tory raws. In this matter, however, we
are at a disadvantage over more central
points, where division of earnings docs
not have to be made with so many lines.
LET US CELEBRATE
The absence of enthusiasm over th»
final announcement of the signing of tho
contract for the San Pedro breakwater
is doubtless more apparent than real.
Hope deferred has made the public heart
sick. The clearing away of one obstacle
has heretofore only served to disclose
another. The resources of the opposi
tion have been so obviously exhaustless
that the community finds it difficult to
realize that the struggle Is really ended
and the victory with thorn. They havo
been waiting expectantly, since the an-
nouneement of the surrender, for the de
velopment of new phases of treachery.
They have been so impressed with the
puissance of the Huntington-Alger com
bine that they are not yet quite ready to
blieve its resources exhausted.
The signing of the contract for the
work, however, should remove all skep
ticism. The people may now with safe
ty give full vent to their joy over the
achievement, and there Is warrant, to
our view, in making a demonstration of
a public nature over the event. Perhaps
the Harbor League will feel inclined to
take the Initiative. We feel assured
there would be a quick and hearty re
sponse to a call for co-operation upon
the part of our people.
HE CAN BE TRUSTED
The appointment of James C. Kays as
arbitrator for the city, to help determine
toe) value of the water company's lm- j
LOS ANGELES HERALD: SUNDAY MORNING, JULY 24, 1898
j provements, will meet with general ap
proval. No citizen of Los Angeles ranks
higher for Integrity and general level
headedness than Mr. Kays. During a
residence of more than twenty years in
Los Angeles he has held various Impor
tant public oftlces. Involving heavy finan
cial responsibilities, and he has also been
called upon to administer large private
trusts. Not a breath of suspicion, not
a hint of inefficiency or unfairness has
ever been directed against Mr. Kays In
all these years. The naming of such a
man to safeguard the city's interests In
the pending arbitration is a guarantee of
fairness and ought to be highly accept
able to all parties in interest.
Spain Is ranked among the Christian]
nations, and yet one of the conditions of
the surrender of Santiago was that the
soldiers of the kingdom should be pro
tected from the treachery of the insur
gents, men of their own race and tongue.
Captain General Augustl, at Manila,
entertains similar apprehensions regard
ing the Philippine insurgents. He would
doubtless long ere this have surrendered
the city to Dewey had the latter been
able to guarantee protection of the non
combatants from rebel fury.
Toral's men, to the number of 2n.onn,
will soon be mingling with their own
people on the peninsula. It Is more than
likely they have had all of the fighting
they want, all of the suffering they can
with patience endure, all of the hard
ships they are capable of withstanding.
They have met the Tankee pig and fed
fur a time at his trough. They might
easily become forceful peacemakers,
even though they have not been forceful
warriors.
The silver Republicans yesterday con
firmed the appointment of J. Noonan
Phillips as state chairman. They also
took the Judicious and generous step of
ararnging that the date of their statp
convention should be two weeks after
that of the Democrats. This action is In
the line of the spirit of harmony which
will insure the triumph of fusion.
Those who withhold suffrage from
women because every" last one of them
has not asked for it oppose the referen
dum because "the people would not take
advantage of It." It is certain, how
ever, that people who will not take the
trouble to vote against a vicious law,
when the opportunity Is afforded them,
deserve to be oppressed.
The Spanish garrison at San Juan hav
ing been kindly advised by the United
States of the departure of Sampson's
squadron, is making extraordinary prep
arations for his reception. In view of
the pains taken to prevent any surprises
to the enemy, it will never do to say this
Is not a humane war.
The Republican state central commit
tee yesterday decided upon the primary
system of choslng delegates to the state
convention, which is called to meet at
Sacramento on the 23d of August. Our
esteemed twilight contemporary didn't
receive the news in time to turn its col
umn rules.
Notwithstanding the conceded Inef
fectiveness of naval bombardments
against land defenses, as illustrated at
Matanzas, Santiago and San Juan, the
jingoes talk glibly about sending Wat
son's fleet to capture Ceuta, a fortress
scarcely second to Gibraltar in impreg
nability.
Had the Merrimac sealed the passage.
Cervera's fleet might still he afloat. San
tiago might still be In the possession of
the Spaniards, and Garcia's nose might
not be out of Joint. Hobson knows how
not to do a thing as well as how to do it.
Any way, 'rah for Hobson 1
The United States having made a gen
erous appropriation for an American ex-
hiblt at Paris, and appointed a commis
sioner general, it Is hoped the French
government will recognize the propriety
of restoring America to the list of civil
ized nations.
We trust our supersensitive frhnds in
the Iberian peninsula will not misinter
pret the meaning of the removal of mines
from American harbors at this early
stage in the proceedings. Not being a
naval power, Spain should not take um
brage.
Press censorship at all points seems to
have been greatly relaxed, if not entirely
abandoned, and Spain is daily advised of
the movements of our troops and vessels
with old-time regularity and nicety of
detail.
The war department complains of the
meagerness of Shaf ter's communications
with it. That he is not conducting an
Intelligence bureau, at the peril of his
true mission, is a gratifying assurance.
Our esteemed secretary of war should
make terms with the war historian pret
ty soon, or his record In this crisis will
show little Improvement over that of tho
last.
The morality of territorial expansion
Is not worrying the Kaiser. All he wants
to know is the approximate location of
the dirt.
The Journal's correspondents have
been banished from Santiago, and the
city's sanitary condition otherwise im
proved.
The mind of the average Cuban is free
from skepticism as to the capability of
the Americans for self-government.
Diedrichs Is obviously trying to see
how near he can come to provoking hos
tilities without doing it.
The government having refused to pur
chase Holland's boat, Spain has the only
submarine navy extant.
Aguinaldo seems to have met with a
serious repulse before Manila. He is
courting others.
"Let me make the senators, and I care
not who fights the country's battles."—
H. H. Boyce.
Spanish editors continue to talk like
American prize fighters. They are quite
•as harmless.
THE HERALD'S MUSE
The Despair of the Seventh
We will go to our tents and lie down in de
spair
And we'll drape In deep mourning Old
Glory so fair;
We will wait on the shore In our anger and
woe
Where the winds from Manila speak softly
and low
Of a tropical land with Its numberless
charms
Where the laurels are won by our comrades
In arms,
Where our bayonets have flashed and our
cannon have pealed;
But Alger has spoken, our doom It is sealed.
When the call of our country flashed over
the land
Did we falter or shrink at the word rff com
mand?
Did we rally from mountain, from valley
and plain,
And Inscribe oni our banner "Remember the
Maine?"
Did we come, did we hasten our station to
fill
With a soldier's desire and a patriot's will?
Would we face the proud foe. brave the
cannon and mine?
Great Alger but speaks and we're left to
repine.
Oh. a mighty commander is Russell A—A—
Such a lion for a roar, such an ass for a
bray;
Me will carve a proud niche in the temple
of fame
And the traitor and imbecile honor his
name.
In the bay of San Pedro his casket shall
rest,
And the ships of our commerce sail over
his breast;
A breakwater monument o'er him shall rise.
And a Huntington only shall weep when he
dies.
O Russell, great Russell, we honor our
chief,
Hoon friend of our Collis (most wonderful
thief),
We wait on thy pleasure, thy slightest
command,
While we live on half rations and camp In
the sand.
If the war should not end until we have
grown gray
And the hosts of our comrades are slain In
the fray,
Till our children unborn shall have grown
to be men,
O mighty commander, remember us then!
O chieftain most mighty, most wise and
most great,
We but ask for six feet of the soil of our
state.
Be It known. If God wills and your honor
shall please,
We will will pass our whole life In the sand
and the fleas,
And proudly He down when the summons
shall come
With the sound of the bugle, the tap of the
drum.
With this simple Inscription o'er each pa
triot breast,
"He waited for Alger and God knows the
rest!"
O. T. FELLOWS.
Pasadena, Cal., July 20. 1898.
Maud Dumpling
"What have you for dinner?"
I asked of the maid.
"Boiled beef with dumplings
We have, sir, she said.
"Dumplings! Are they heavy?"
I asked of the maid.
"Oh, no; I can lift them
Alone, sir," she said.
Past Experience, Good Advice
We trust the people of Los Angeles will
not take It amiss If tho Examiner ventures
a few words of advice. In regard to the
drawing of the charier that is now in the
hands of their board of freeholders. We
are a good ways from their clt.v, but we
have an Interest In Its good government
and prosperity.
On matters of local organisation and
local Interest we would not presume to ad
vise, but on the general principle of mu
nicipal government we have a word to
say, and that Is that honest nnd satisfac
tory government can best be secured by
giving the people as much power ns possi
ble.
A large part of the corruption In city
governments comes from the fact that
when the people elect an official they have
no further power over him. Within the
limits of his authority he is nbsolute. The
people cannot remove an official who acts
against their will. He may have got into
office on a specific pledge that he would
take a certain course of action. But if
he takes the opposite course of action he
cannot be removed, however angry the
people may be at their betrayal. Especial
ly Is this true of the legislative pari of
the city government. The remedy for
this Is to put Into the hands of the people
the powers that are most likely to be
abused; to provide machinery by which
the people may force their agents to obey
their will.
We refer the Los Angeles board of free
holders to the work of the recent board of
freeholders In this city for an example
of the method of correcting some of the
most dangerous abuses of city govern
ment. They have put In the hands of the
people the power of legislation without
limit, and have given them the power of
veto in regard to those matters In which
Jobbery Is most frequent. The people can.
without the consent of any officer, Initiate
and carry through the acquisition oI any
of the public utilities. The purchase, or
lease, or sale of city property of Impor
tance Is made subject to their veto at the
following election, and in other ways the
people are given the opportunity to take
an active part in the affairs of govern
ment. The people of San Francisco are
not hereafter to turn over their affairs to
agents with on Irrvocnble power of at
torney fo'4 two years. They are to retain
many of the powers themselves. And,
finally, they are to have the power ot In
itiating and carrying through amend
ments to the charter without asking the
consent of the legislative body of the city.
We trust that the Los Angeles board
of freeholders will be quite as progressive
as their brethren of this city In providing
against some of the most serious evils that
threaten the welfare of American
cliles.—San Francisco Examiner.
A Legislative Feat
The most trying moment in a representa
tive's career Is said to he when he asks un
animous consent for consideration of a bill
carrying an appropriation. Some political
opponent sees a chance to get even, or some
member whose breakfast did not suit him
objects on general principles, without
knowing why In particular, and the speak
er ruthlessly proceeds to other business. If
no' one Is ready to object, there are some
thing like a score of members to ply the
trembling applicant with one of a half
dozen stereotyped questions as to what the
bill Is for or why It should not be referred
to some Judicial tribunal or be postponed.
Some men have the knack of running this
gauntlet, of gauging the temper of the
house, and passing hlll» thnt others could
not secure consent for. One of these men
Is Representative Moody of Massachu
setts. Mr. Moody has a constituent at Box
ford, In Essex county, Benjamin S. Barnes
by name. Thlrty-flve years ago several
regiments of Massachusetts troops were
encamped on his farm. They cut off the
timber, burned his barn, and did other
serious damage to the amount of 11273. The
claim has been before congress for many
| sessions and ordinarily would raises shower ■
If Reliable Clothing!
/ <A U ~~ * T SUWHIER |
f I ll *\ " y°<» Wtnt a Way-Up Suit at very much less thin the reg f
M / "I" Price, attend THE JULY MARK-DOWN SALE. Style, |
H ] * |\J\/ fit and finish equal to custom made. 5
\aL/ / r Men's $18.00 Sammer Suits at $15.00 |
1 ffl Men's $15.00 Summer Suits at $12.00 |
J I Men's $12.00 Summer Suits at $10.00 |
/ 1 Men's $10.00 Summer Suits at $8.50 *
\l MULLEN & BLUETT CLOTHING CO. j
' '
I Homemade Cakes Jg) |
j|K The same careful measurement of ingredients, "■™ l »^*\lJ^LL- J W)
the same scrutiny of quality anj the same W
Of? care in mixing that you would take in the
making of a cake tor a special occasion, is taken CT/Mi t\Rsl
iffil by our expert bakers in the preparation of our t rl V -A
fl§| Home-made Cakes. But we make them for a con- I / \ W
siderable less than you could hope to, for we make J?, { V W
M. so many. Next time try one of Jevne's delicious fflfa Jfa
208-210 S. Spring St. Wilcox Building
REFRIGERATORS
CONSUMPTION CURED DR^k H iA B B r oN
Private Fanitarlura. Report ol cases sent free. 415>4 South Spring St.. Los Angeles, Cal.
of "yelps from the watchdogs of the treas
ury." a la Representative Mall any, If pre
sented In the house. Mr. Moody presented
the claim the other day, with an explana
tion that the beneficiary was now a very
old man, much In need of the money. It was
one of the legislative feats of the week tnat
the bill passed without objection.—Wash
ington Post.
A Church Service at Home
Mr. Rings (to his valet, Sunday morn
ing)— Well. I declare, this Is a wonderful
age! Thanks to the discoveries of science,
I am able to sit here comfortably In my
room, and by means of a phonograph par
ticipate In an entire service of Westmin
ster abbey. Now, James, take your place
at the box and begin turning the crank
when you see that I have the tubes properly
adjusted.
James—Yesslr.
Mr. Blngs (half an hour later)—l am get
ting a little tired, James. Turn just a trifle
faster.
Mr. Blngs (ten minutes later)— What's the
matter, James?
James—Please, sir, the maid just opened
the door and said Mr. Whlpp was want-In'
you to go out riding with him. His car
riage is at the door. I told hor you was en
gaged, but you'd b% down as quick as you
got through.
Mr. Blngs—Quite right. But I haven't got
to the sermon yet. Turn, James—turn like
sixty!— New York Weekly.
The Smashing of Cervera
The difference between Admiral Sampson
and Sheridan is that Sampson was only
seven miles away when the fun began,
but those were the longest seven miles that
ever worried a fighting man. In view of
the circumstances, we have decided to wear
a Schley button over our patriotic heart,
and wish better luck to the admiral next
time. We can almost see Dewey's grin at
this distance. We observe that our gallant
fellow-countryman, Captalnn Evans, In
dulged In his favorite allusion to the In
fernal regions, with which he appears to
be tolerably familiar, and we shall leave
him to the tender mercies of the ministerial
alliance, with the propitiating reminder
that even the immortal Washington swore
horribly on one occasion in the heat of
battle. It Is creditable to the gallant Cer
vera that there are no reports of profanity
emanating from him, although he had
some provocation. It seems that he WM
too busy shedding tears of mortification to
swear.—Chicago Post.
A Name to Fit
"So you call your dog Dewey, do you? It
seems to me that he's a very honr-ly
looking cur to be honored with such a
name."
"But Dewey Is an especially appropriate
name for this dog."
"How so?"
"It doesn't matter what he happens to bo
doing, he's always ready to suspend opera
tions for breakfast."—Chicago News.
Stepping Stone to Prosperity
The California congressional delegation
needs no urging on the Nicaragua canal
matter, but still there is no harm in remind
ing them that the people hero are all anx
ious for the fulfillment of the great project.
It would moan the greatest stopping-stone
to prosperity the west has had since the
day Marshall discovered gold In California.
—Oakland Tribune.
The World's Visual Angle Increased
American armor plate. American guns
and the American men behind the guns are
causing Europe to see stars and stripes
everywhere.—Philadelphia Press.
POINTED PARAGRAPHS
Some politicians begin at the bottom and
work down.
Nearly every man you meet is posing as
his own Ideal.
The earth Is the first revolver of which
we have any record.
The bachelor leads a single life, but the
married man Is often led.
The thatrical "angel" is wingless, hut his
money flies, just the same.
Solomon said it all; there is nothing left
for us but a I if tie remodeling.
Beware of the man who practises humil
ity; tir- may be trying to humtlate you.
A woman's understanding ha© a great
deal to do with her Ideas of dress reform.
It may pain a mother when she corrects
her naughty offspring, but not in the same
place.
When a sociable man has a minute to
spare he goes and bothers some man who
Is busy.
An old bachelor aays ho never married
because marriage (c a lottery, and lotteries
are illegal,
v .
IN THE PUBLIC EYE
Believing that the next house of repre
sentatives will be Democratic, the friends
of Congressman David A. De Armond, of
Missouri, have brought him forward as a
candidate for the speakership.
Zachariah Ziazelle, a farmer of Delta
township, Ingham county, Mich., Is said
to be an exact counterpart of Gen. Shafter
both ;ts to features and form. Zazetls
weighs nearly 300 pounds.
The Princess Dolgourouka, the beauty
who fascinated Czar Alexander and be
came his morganatic wife, Is now de
scribed as " a dreadfully ill-dressed wom
an, with bloated and blotohy face, specta
cles, and a most prominent, ugly nose."
Middle-aged and old people in Oalesburp;
remember when Shafter, the Santiago
hero, was a hustling employe of the Bur
lington road at that place. He is remem
bered as a manly, ambitious young fel
low, tho leader in spelling and wrestling.
Lieut. John G. Qulnby, who fired the dy
namite guns on the Vesuvius at Santiago
harbor, is a son of the late Brig. Gen. I. F.
Quinby, a classmate and friend of Gen-
Grant. Lieut. Qulnby was appointed to
Annapolis by President Grant, and though
Its youngest member he graduated third
In his class.
It is said that when Schley and Sampson
were young oillcers on board the same ship
a number of years ago the latter ordered
severe punishment inflicted on a marina
for an offense of which tho man was guilt
less. Schley protested, a quarrel ensued
and the man who is now commodore)
slapped Sampson's face. Since then they
have never been friends.
Guy U. Lee, of Rockford. a student In
the university, has started from Madison
to Brazil in a canoe. He went across Lake
Monona and followed the Yahara south.
He will go down the Ko.-k river to the Mis
sissippi, thence to New Orleans, then
across of the Gulf of Mexico and the Carlb
ouu sea to the south Atlantic ocean and
Etta Janeiro.
The death of Dr. Yon Rokitansky, of
Gra.z, a son of the celebrated Viennese
Vrrt. Yon Rokitansky, calls to mind tha
fat -at the latter had four boys, two of
who. tudl-d medicine, wnile''the othef
two imo singers. When asked what
their »fof•isloni wore the elder Yon Roki
tansky Ulvariably replied: "Zwei heulef
tid zwei hellen "—"Two howl and twA
heal."
Admiral Dewey was i 'ways a strict dis
ciplinarian, and occaslot.ally inflicts pun
ishment In curious ways. Once while lit
a foreign port he suddenly ordered tho
heaviest tackle to be gotten out of the hold
without delay. After two "hours' hard
work his order was carried out, and he
then directed that a large chew of tobacco
which had been thrown under one of tha
guns l)e hoisted overboard. Never again
on that cruise was such an unpardonable
offense committed.
In France there are 83 females to-every
100 males.
SIMMER RESORTS
Write for circulars and full Information
as to special advantages, rates, manner of
reaching, etc., mentioning The Herald.
Magnetic Springs.
GLENWOOD, CAL.
Mountain House; heart of the Santa Crus
mountains; hot and cold magnetio baths
free; cottages for families; stage meets
S:l5 train from San Francisco. Terms to
suit every health-seeking person. Partic
ulars of L. V. PERHACS, Glenwood, Cal.
Independence Lake
A Charming Spot to Visit
This Summer
lioats Irce to guests. Fine fish.ng. Excellenl
tables, clean beds and careful attention to pat*
ronv Climate period Nixtoeu mllos from
Truckee, in the heart ol tho sierra, and «ur.
rounded br magnificent trees of an unbroken
forest The ideal spot for families, became it
is clean No poison oak. do pests, but pure air
and pure water. Now open to (he public
Addreis M Its H M. CI.E.MOXH.
Indcpendanre Lake, Cal.
Monte Vista
In Sierra Nevada Mountains. Sixteen rooms
added. Fine table, tona of all kinds ot fruit; can
help yourself: delightful climate, elevation
8600 feet. Illnatrated catalogue. Thomas & Mot
gan, Monte Vista, Dutch flat, Placet Co,, o*l,