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6 LOS ANGELES HERALD B* THIS HfiRAMI CftMPAWT i -n ajvK a. Fiwi,Airso!» pw«m»«« •nOBT. M. YOST....rc«!Hl»»l»l M«MI««M ft. H. LAVEIITY.... .Bit«fn#«« Mwn»«>» OLDEST MORNINfI PAPER IN LOS ANOF.I.KR P«n«dH O«f. 9. 187» thlf«r-r«nrtll YM*. Chamber of Commerce Ilntlrflnc. TELEPHONES — flunnU PrMI U Home Th« Herald.' The rtnly Democrats newspaper in Southern California receiving th« full Associated Press reports. . . NEWS SERVICK— Member of the AM *«clat«d Press, receiving Its full re port, averaging 28.Q00 words a d«r_ EASTERN AGENT— J. P- M'KlnnM'j 805 Potter bulldlna, New TorK; 111 noyca building. Chicago. RATES OF "SUBSCRIPTION WITH SUNDAY MAGAZINE: Dully, by carrier, p«r month $ •}{ pally by mall,.<hrw month I*B Dally, by mall, six months ».9V Dally, by mall. on« ye&r 7.»» Sunday Herald, by mall, one year.. 2.50 •Weekly Herald, by wall, ona year. I.OQ Entered at PoStofrtc*. Los Angeles, as Btcond-clftgg matter. '_ ___— THE HERALD IN SAN FRANCISCO AND OAKLAND — Eos Angeles and Southern California visitors to Ban Frmolico and Oakland will find Tne Hereld on *ale at the no^ s 1 A tt Iftnd"1 ftnd ". n S the San Francisco ferry building and on the Streets in Oakland by Wheatley nnd by Amos New Co. Population of Los Angeles, 251,463 "Doc" Houghton renomlnated? Help! Help! ■■■'..('- •■■'-'-• y Llndley also bows his neck for the S. P. collar. Doesn't Ruef wish that he, too, had gone abroad? Herrin and Hearst; Ruef and the S. P.: Oillett and defeat. San Francisco has already paid the fiddler; it Is now dancing. How'd you like to be in Gillett's em* barrasslng position right now? Will the S. P. rush to the aid of Its partner, Ruef,. irt his time of peril? Bell will • be the next governor of California — Mr. Harrlman to the con trary notwithstanding. All the wires In the city will be un der ground in 200 years. But what good'U that do any of us? When thieves fall out honest men may get their dues. There's comfort In that for San Fraiicisco — maybe. - Bell Is arousing the upstate Republi cans'JUst as he did those down this way, with his ringing arguments. Tou don't hear Bell's name mixed up with Ruef in that San Francisco mess, do you? That's significant, don't you think? Secretary Shaw's elastic currency may stretch a good ways, but it won't put any more coin In the pockets of the poor man. San Francisco wants its mayor back, but doesn't know where he is. Perhaps Behmitz doesn't want San Francisco to know. Huh? In view of the developments of rot ten work up in San Francisco, how does Gillett now enjoy that view of his hand on Ruefs Shoulder? Judge a. man by the company he keeps. Gillett rests his hand bn Ruefs shoulder. The prosecutors are after Ruef. There ydu are. Will Gillett kindly go to the rescue of his companion, friend and' backer, Ruef, who'' ls in peril of .being found out, up in- San Francisco? M. T. Collins will be on both the non partisan and Democratic city tickets as councilman from the Ninth ward and should easily defeat the machine-made Mr. Blanchard. Ruef and the S. P. machine named filllett for governor. Ruef is now In a panic for fear of prosecution for grafting and the S. P. machine is smashed. Where is Oillett? Eastern roads blocked by snow storms and ten passenger trains lying in one railroad yard. Out here, sun too hot for comfort. Come west, sufferers; here Is tho real promised land. The B. P. Is to double its train service from Los Angeles to tho east. That Elves Lo« Angeles twice the trains on all lines that It had a year ago. Looks like we'd get a few visitors, eh? C, A. Barlow will meet Congressman Smith in Joint debate tonight at Ba kerufleld,. and If Barlow doesn't make mlnce-mcat ht Kmith's alleged argu ments, all Democrats will be surprised; Owl car patronage is showing a sub- Ftantlal increase and it Is certain that from the beginning of November the Los Angeles Railway company will have no complaint to mako on this 6core. Even the Republican organs admit that the defection from Olllett to Bell IS astonishing. And the organs need not be astonished to find that Bell has carried the election by at least 40,000 majority, . San Francisco might have had the Ruef-Republlcan expose long ugo, and much grafting might havo been stopped had Langdon stayed at home und pros ecuted, the criminals as he was sworn to do. . Instead of wind-Jammlng about the 'state on a fruitless effort to grab another office. The. Southern Pacido machine In con centrating' Its efforts to elect Us own HHSfSsor. supervisees, coroner, assem- blymen and state senators. The people may have the rest, and welcome. But the people would like to have all their own officials, If you pleaße, Mr. K. p. And "Ben Wai'd, Pu Booth, Dr. Lamb and thf whole, county non-partisan ticket' lb going- to he elected in aplte of THE TRUTHFUL CAMERA Th« familiar phrftfte, "An •■«/ at lying,' 1 attest* the proneness of man to stretch the truth. Another' common saying \n that "Figures won't lie," but forced balances *of defaulting bank tellers nn<\ the like prove that figure* can be Juggled into* an' appearartc* of lying. tJhllke the tongue and the ftgurer, however, th<»re is one familiar creation that, like the Juvenile George Washing ton, "cannot tell a lie." tt Is the carhara. that instrument tells "th* truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth." And It Is a witness that cannot be made lo Vary a hair's breadth by any trick in cross-examination, In last Sunday* Issue of The Herald appeared a most striking example 6f the camera's trutlifulnpda. It was the splendidly reproduced page-wide photo graph of a group that Is sure to become historical In the annals of California. No attentive reader of The Herald can have failed to take particular note of the picture In question— the poses of the eleven persona portrayed, their several facial expressions antt general mani festations of character. This picture Is of special Importance because It Illustrate* the fact adverted to Rt the beginning of this ortlcle. That is to say, the Infallibly truthful camera proves tho correctness of the Phrase which tells that lying Is "dead easy." There are two central figures In that picture, one in sitting posture and the other erect. Tho sitter Is the notorious Abe Ruef, political czar of, San Fran cisco. Standing directly behind Ruef is James N. Gillett, S. P.-R^publlcan machine candidate for governor. Mr. Glllett's left hand rests fondly upon the left shoulder of Ruef, and his face seems to beam with gratitude to the little boss -who rounded up the San Francisco delegates at Santa Cruz. Standing by the side of Mr. Gillett and touching elbows with him Is Walter Parker, the right bower of Boss.Herrfn, the Southern Pacific's' political man ager In California. Grouped on each side of these central figures, behind the banquet table, are secondary lights of the S. P.-Republlcan machine- who assisted In running the Santa. Cruz con- It was the group depicted, in that, photograph who outlined -the program to be followed in the convention on the ensuing day. That work had just been completed when the group, feeling happy thereat and being exhilarated In a manner suggested by the ekpty; glasses on the table, posed for the photograph reproduced in The Herald, i Now we return to the text. Candi date Gillett declared In all his speeches made In Southern California that there is no affiliation whatever between him and the Southern Pacific managers. He has affected a repugnance to- the monopoly those managers represent. He also has scouted the Idea of any political relationship between himself and Ruef, notwithstanding the records of the convention showing that Ruef held the balance of power In the con vention and that he gave : jt to the man now 1 posing- as an opponent/of machine politics. ■'.?■£>. ■■'-■ ::-\ii What a wide difference' there. ls be tween the truthfulness of the camera, and some persons whose Images it depicts on the photographic pldte.'. LOS ANGELES "FEEDERS" -A new, and most promising territory tributary to Los Angeles is opening aa a result of railway communication with the ".gold mining district of Nevada. The centers of activity in the new dis trict have been retarded In development by lack of railway, service, but the end of that drawback Is in . sight. All the leading points In the rather extensive new minirfg territory now are assured of railway communication. The Idea was widely prevalent, until a recent period, that the present ex ploitation of Nevada gold mining was based largely on a speculative "boom" and the memory of the state's gold out put a generation ago. No Comstock bonanzas have been discovered thus far In the new territory, but enough hard pan facts have been revealed to prove that rich "diggings", are .scattered throughout a section of wide area. Many mines are yielding handsome re turns to their fortunate owners, and ex perienced mining men believe that much richer discoveries may be ex pected as development progresses. The projection of spur lines into the Nevada gold fields from the Salt Lake railway main line will bring the whole of this mining territory within railway touch of Los Angeles. A large and constantly growing business with that territory has beca handled from this city since the completion of the Salt Lake main line, but long distance team- Ing, to central points was a serious handicap. With that difficulty removed a fresh incentive to business relations between Los Angeles and the new El dorado Is Bure to follow. The" enterprising business men of Salt Lake have been alert in reaching out for trade In the new district, but they are lacking In many advantages which favor this city. Los Angeles is dis tinctly a mining supply center, while Salt Lake Is not. All sorts of mining appliances required in Nevada tire man ufactured right f here In Los Angeles, and any up«clal order can bo quickly (Wed In this city. . • .:..,,■. It is notable that the success attend ing mining operations In Nevada has stimulated fresh interest In the gold bearing territory which extends over a wide area of tho Southern California detert and mountain region. Capital sufficient to overcome the difficulties in transportation artf "water development Is the only thing needful to develop the vast mineral resources . lying compara tively near, to Los Angeles. In putting Thanksgiving on Novmn ber 29 the president evidently wanted to give the turkey the longest possible lease of lift. llciipy. the Ban Francisco prosecutor, wants Sc-hmlU. (iood; but It's another thing to get him. LOS ANGELE9 HERALD; THURSDAY MORNING, OCTOBER 23, 1906. PRIM ARr ELECTION FARCE The small fraction of th« city vote (hat wan polled At the primary election shown how farcical the system has become. The-vote wnft- relatively the *m«1le«t, probably, ever cast In the Los Angeles prlmafloo. Thli because n larjn proportion of r#«pMtAble voters decline to have any thing to Ho with an electoral feature that Is notoriously In control of par tisan heelers. TJlft experience 6t last Tueftda? In this city undoubtedly mad* many utip porters for the direct primary plan which Is likely to be taken up In the next session of the legislature. By that plan the -whole system of selecting candidate* through the medium of delegates would b« abolished. Instead of the delegate nystem electors would vote directly for the men whom they desired to see represented on the final tickets. Thus the partisan control of nil nw riff, an Illustrated Tuesday, would be entirely eliminated. Th« direct primary system Is em ployed in some other states with sat isfactory results and there Is no reason why It should not work an effectively In California. This state tins come to" be kiiown as the most completely bowi rldden *tat<» in the Union, and any hon est effort to save It from a continuance of. such disgrace Is entitled' lo earnest consideration. The delegate system In Ideal elec tions la ns useless, for any good pur pose, as a fifth wheel to a wagon. It not only nerves no good purpose, but on the contrary provides a means whereby political bosses may control the selection of candidates and thereby fill the public offices with creatures who recognize the will of the bosses as the highest authority. As a present rebuke to boss Influence in local affairs the voters of Los An geles should show their independence of every phase of boss rule at the polls. Do this by casting the ballot In oppo sition to every machlrfe-made "candi date. . The board of education should take immediate steps to properly complete the new school buildings. Patrons have exercised uncommon patience, In view of the difficult conditions under which the board labored during the early days of this proposition. But there seems to^ be.no reason left why the new build ings should not be promptly completed. The board is under fire from every direction, and a« business njen they ought to realize that they* must quickly finish the job with which they have dallied' for' a year. The- schools are overcrowded; the new buildings are needed at once, and any further delay will tend to irritate and exasperate the public. • ', Democrats, who are desirous of vot ing for Mri Brotherton for state sena tor—and most > Democrats are— should remember that Mr. Brotherton'6 name is on the ilon-partlsan ticket— not on the so-called Democratic ticket. It Is well to keep this fact In mind. The Ute Indians threaten .to go' on the warpath. Hear ex-General Miles snort. MR. BELL OM LABOR <$> On Saturday night, September <S •?," 29, HOn. Theodore A. Bell. Homo - <j <§> cratle nominee for governor, «d- 4 <§> dressed -trie nnlon labor organ- <■ &> izatlons of tul* city, -olio had <3 4> given him a great reception. In <i <?' the course of hli speech Sir, Bell <• 4> aaldi >,- i. . .:,; # 1 <$> x "1 have alvrayi bellered <hnt the'<? <$> chief executive of the state should . 4 4' not and cannot be -the' repreieata- < v?> tlve of any special clasa. .'■ : 4 <•> "So for that reason I -mill not << <$> say If I am elected I will be the < <$> special representative of labor, for 4 4> H I did you would not believe me,* <• <•' and if I did I would be unworthy <• <i> to hold that office. < <§> "I lave taken this nomination <i <e> from tbe labor party as a great A <$> compliment to me. I have not < <?> been an agitator or demagogue <i 4> with them. I have simply told <• <$> them my vleiyi of labor conditlona < •$> and what I mean to do. < t> "They hate exacted no pledge < <$> from me. They have dimply asked < •$> me to stive labor a square deal. I < <••> would nave done that even had < <•> they not asked me. . For had I < <•> felt otherjvlse toward labor, or < <•> any other class, I would have felt < <*> unworthy to accept the nomlna- < <J- tlon." < Leavetaking you, who do not know, Btand by the door and watch from there, Impatient at the lone delay and foolish With which I take each little thing from from its accustomed place — The tiny clift-k. and old Satsuma vase. The Imaged Virgin and the Child, And winsome Psyche who has smiled At her brook-mirrored beauty — trifles all— And yet and yet the hours that they recall! To you -who stand beside tho door and . watch from there, •" ■ ■.■ Impatient at tho long delay and foolish- care. I know the tender touch, the lingering hand Are reasonless to you who do not under stand. And count the little room, at best, but a poor place With meager share of sunlight, lacking grace Of rare, rich hangings that so subtly please And charm tho fancy and invite to ease— You cannot know that here, that hero was built a shrlno Whore my soul worshiped, learning the Sweet mystery of love, that 'tis the place Where love lies buried. But I hide tho Of tear l*st you should know. The • B«cret's mine, The secret of tho «r«ve and of tho —Marga'rct llannls, In Watson's Maga .sine. . . . Buispiclous , Mrs. Hiram Often — My new unok wai formerly employed by Mrs. Swellman, and sh« clulms she left of her own ac cord, but I suspect sh« was discharged. Mr». Ascum-What makes you think that? Mrs. Hiram Offen — Oh, because of Rome things she's let fall since she's been with me. Mrs. Ascum— What were they? ' Mra. Hiram Off«n—Dishes!—Phila delphia Press. "QUESTION OF MANHOOD," SAYS REPUBLICAN EDITOR John Walton of the Pomona Times Will Vet* for Bell, and Says It ll Time for Honest Republicans to Rise Against Railroad Rule Staff Correopnndnnrtft SacrAmento Bee. POMONA, Oct. 21.— There could be no better reflex of tho attitude of Inde pendent Republicans. In Southern Cali fornia toward the nomination of Olllett ht Ranta Cruz lot ftdvernor than the position taken by the. Pomona Times, whose editor, John wasson. is one of the oldent and most respected Journal ists In the state. The Times is the old est n«*fsp«per In the populous Pomona valley, and has always been Hgpubli can, but It t-Hiiiiot. countenance the rail road ticket. Its editor Is bold and fear lt>s«. and from the time the Bantu Cru* Convention completed Its uor^ he has through his paper mid In other ways denounced the complete and abject surrender to the , Southern Pacific bosses. 4 telling the Truth Plainly It ha* been mentioned in a prior letter tlist on the- day following the nomination the. ..iPlmes printed the ticket, hpftlniihiK mh follows: "Governor— -Thn •• Southern Pacific company, alias James N. Oillett, Hum boldt." In the sams Ishup It had an editorial beginning with those words: "Under tho direction of W. V. Herrin and Wal ter V. X, Parker, the convention at Santa Cms last week practically nom inated the Southern Pacific company for governor of California." There' are journals more widely clr vulatea In Southern California than tho Pomona Times hut none more respected or more Influential In proportion to the extent of Its field. Its editor has found much encouragement In his attitude toward the Southern Paclfto ticket, headed by ulllett and. Porter, In numer out personal letters received from prominent Republicans. As an exam ple of the general tone of these epistles, the Bee's correspondent has been per mitted to copy the following:, from one of the best known Republicans in Southern California, who has twice been a delegate to Republican national conventions, has voted the Republican ticket for upward of forty years, and contributed large sums to Republican campaign funds: Railroad Defiance of the Public "LOS ANGELES, Sept. 10.— Mr. John ■Wasson, Pomona, Cal. — My Dear Friend: Received the two papers you forwarded, and read with much pleas ure the two editorials referring to the actl6n of the Republican state conven tion In nominating a railroad candi date for governor, with which I heartily agree, and for the first time in my life may vote for the head of the Demo cratic ticket. "The railroads are' evidently pursu ing their old tactics with increased ex perience ana defiance of the public, which is as thoroughly illustrated in this town and vicinity as any place I know of, and will soon become an im portant and prevailing issue here. "Yours very truly, — — — ." More Editors Like Wasson Needed In like fashion a member of the Re publican central committee of Riverside county writes: v.r, ■■ "RIVERSIDE, Sept. 28.— Mr. John Wesson, Pomona Times — My Dear Mr. Wasson: i have been reading your reference to the Santa Cruz convention, and I am highly gratified that there is a Republican editor In Southern Cali fornia who can fearlessly and openly make known his Indignation at the happenings there. The editors of our papers are all too ready to fall In the wake pf the convention and inddrse all its doings, however shameful and cor rupt they. -way be,.' ,-: 7 -.-..■■ . i;.-.,^. 1 .' ""I would' to God we had a new gen eration of editors in charge of the pa pers, | particularly those of Souhtern California. Yours sincerely, '?: The names of the writers of these two letters are omitted, as they were not intended for. publication, and were con fidential in character. Others of like tenor, and from Republicans ! equally prominent, could ,b(j given from the same source. i Republicans Greatly 'Dissatisfied "I believe," said JJr. 'Wasson today, "that many Republicans in Southern California are very greatly dissatisfied with the slavish subservience of the Santa Cruz convention to the Southern Pacific bosses.i and Will not vote Tor Oillett, because they regard him as the railroad nominee. No small number of them will vote for Bell. . •';.< "For my part,' I have no quarrel with the Southern Pacific. I have -always admired and extolled Its enterprise, and the great 'Svotk It has done In 'helping the development of the state. But when it undertakes to use Its power to control or direct the government of California it is high time to call a halt. Not satisfied with controlling the legls Mrs. B. Z — So you haven't been able to work for 20 yearn T . Weary Waggs-Yea'm. fou see. der« wua a heavy mortgage on de old home < ud I •trained myself tryln' to lift It. *T»*«rty «v«ry woman tiks xn« I* Tin lookln* («r work— «un4 yet dey iay veoM ■in t sot no «ona» of humor!" • latnf*. an It has done for yeari", nnd electing United States senators. It hag now virtually named the Republican candidate for governor, and ©v*il dic tated the Judicial nominations. A Question of Manhood "And nun the qntntlnn In whether ilkto I* rnniißh mnnhooft In the lie* piiMlcnii |mrl> of Cnllfornln io-pnt n «<op to xuch ciiilrnßCMK nbii«<« of pOTtrt, or Tvbrtlicr th«s people nre to remain political Drrfx. "I fthnll mj-nvlf, nllhnnah n lirrlnnit »i«-iMilillcnn, xnt* for Theodore llfll Mr Kmrrnnn not hprmi'f h* I* n Democrat* •»«l hrcmnc !>*■ I* the only way to rf f«ctlvelf protetM ngnlnxt th« nllrnml nnmlnntlon of the lirpiihllrnn pnrtjx "There Is not, In reality, any Hep«b» llcftn State ticket this year. Olllett was first chosen for governor by E. 11. Har rlman. and the selection made by tho president of the Southern Pacific com pany wad ratified at Banta Cruz by the efforts of Herrin, Parker and Iluef. Buoh a ticket does not deserve to he considered Republican, ami no Repub* llcan nf spirit und Independence, who has the host Interests of this state at heart, should rpgard It as having any claims on his party allegiance." Another Republican Paper In Revolt Those declarations by the Pomona Times nnd Its veteran edltnt 1 aro In har mony with those of the Pawdena New*, anothfr staunch and able Repub lican Journal, which said In a recent issue: "In this state It has boen conceded openly by every leading newspaper in the Republican, party that its conven tion, Instead of being the free expres sion of the Republicans of the state, ■was dominated absolutely by a self constituted political manipulator, rep resenting the one most powerful corpo ration In this state." Degradation of the Judiciary The News has likewise referred In sorrowful terms to the "unspeakable shamo" of California "in having judl olnl nominations dictated by Herrin and Ruef, or made as a result of trading in a party convention." According to the most trustworthy sources of information, there Is very strong resentment among the Republi can fruit growers of the Pomona valley, one of the most fertile and productive parts of Southern California, 'with the manner In which the railroad bosses ruled the state convention at Santa Cruz. And -while , there may not be much open revolt, It Is certain that a. large quiet '• Republican vote will be polled for Bell on election day. TELEPHONE TEXTB His number is 666.— Rev. xlii., 18. Thou didst call me.— l. Sam., 111., 6. He tellest the number. — Ps., cxlvll., 4. I understood the number.— Dan., Ik., There is no speech nor language.-— PS., xlx., 3. When I call, answer me speedily. — Ps., cl., 2. I said in my haste, "I am cut off." — Ps., xxxl., 22. 1 called him, but he gave me no an- Bwer.— Cant., v., 6. - - . . ■ ; They could not take hold of his words.— Luke, xx., 26. We use great plainness of speech. — 11. Cor., ill., 12. • His name should not have been cut off.— lea,, xlvlil., 19. i .-};; Call now, if there b* any that will answer thee. — Job, v., 1. Ye ' heard my conversatldn In time pißt.-^Gal., i., IS. . . . If he cut off, and shut up, who can hinder him?— Job, %1., 10. Then they waited according to their order.— l. • Chron., vl., 32. Where Is the receiver?— lsa., xxxvi,, Let every nian be swift to hear anfl slow to speak.— Jamas, i., Id. Call thou and I will answer, ond let me speak, and answer thou me.— Job, xlll., 22. -.. - . Except they give a distinction to the sounds, how- shall it be known? — I. Cor., xiv., 7. I had rather speak five -words with my understanding than. 10,000 In an un known tongue.— l. Cor., xlv... 19.- : : * .•? Except ye utter words easy to he un derstood, how shall it be known what Is epoketi? For ye shall speak into the air.— l. Cor., xlv,, 9. — Baltimore Sun. Get a Move On "When you see trouble coming, the best thine to do is to whistle." "NO, It isn't." *"What IS, then?" "Get out of tlie way."— Detroit Fr^e Press. Pen Sketches BY. XV. F. MARIUNEfI Nurse— Hlvlrtst Tbe> baby swallowed a bottle of lnH an' not a bit of blotting paper In th" houay Ut« JTrfciia-l fou*ht you wui cola* to Doiiiml t nuioldt. J*ru<*aT Th» HeW.a-l wui! but whan I t*t to/d* river J rtrawnbw** I'd to,*at m« •wluualn tights, ■••<:■ i SAYS MINIMUM PLAN EXTORTION SCORES METHOD OF METERING WATER Citizen Declare* Municipal Ownership, as Exemplified by the Present System,- II I Flat Failure - nv \Mj utomsj Tho American as nn Individual i* smart enough, hut It la becoming « settled convW-tlon wllh inn that as fl citizen he Is a "patient, hrp," hearing, If n6t contentedly, nt least submissive ly, whatever prepnMrroim burden of* fl<;lHl greed mid Inoompetonce *Pc» fit ♦ o Impose upon him. Look ill his flt tltudc In the niHtter of rlly water. PHi'tlculni'ly In regard to so-culled "metei" water. Having. »fter yeiirn of putlent endurance, wriggled out of the private cnmpaiiy'n hands, he goes on submitting to similar extortion from a civic WHtPr hoard. I won't say ho does this uncomplain ingly, for 1 henr complaints bII around: liut it Is Dick complaining to Tom and Tom to .Hurry— n sort of "mutual con dolence on grievances" lenguo— nnrt there Is littlo offort to lodge complaint where complaint Would <lo most good. (1) "Two hundred cuhlc feel Water Bt 7 wilts per 100 feet— sl.oo." (2) "Throe hundred cubln fret nt 1 cents — $1.00." Such are my water bills for tho last two month*. Thus fiOO feft rost mo $2. though 1 am entitled to 1400 feet for $1. Of course there Is an attempt by the water department to justify this absurd arithmetic by printing n. footnote on the bill saying: "Minimum rate per month $1." As If a, blunt declaration of Intent to "hold you up" rendered It any the legs a robbery. On complaining at being charged $1 for 14 cents' worth of water, I was met with the cool retort: "Wo charge a,s long ns the water Is on whether you use It or not"— and this Is water by meter, mark you— now imagine your grocer seeking to justify a 600 per cent orercharge In his bill in the same way: "We charge as long as we are, open, whether you have the goods or not, and you must pay the amdunt; It is our minimum." And h6te the latest development: A notice was recently put out In the pre« 9 by the water department that the mint mum rate had been reduced to 75 cents. Still the bills come in for $1. The collector claims to know nothing of any reduction. Inquiry at head quarters elicits that "it is contemplated to reduce the minimum to 75 cents and this will probably take -effect at the hew year. In other -words, "though we admit we have been overcharging you ahd that we are still doing so, and though we consequently feel compelled to quit or rather to moderate a little in this respect, yet we think you are "easy" enough to stand it for a few months more on the bare hint we will let up some time." Reminds me of the man who prayed: "O, Lord, I have been a grievous sinner, but I will quit my evil ways and turn to the paths of righteousness in ten weeks 1 , time, come Sunday, or thereabouts." Now there is an element of danger to the city in all this: at least of the water department's claim of scarcity of water is not a blind, scare. If water is scarce the consumer should be given ah Incentive to üße It carefully and savingly. instead of which he Is charged for 1400 feet if he only uses 100 or less. What Is the result* "Let her go! I've got to pay for It anyway," and the lawn Is soaked for hours at a stretch or the water is- wasted In other Ways. -'lyi* 1 -' She Tou swore in ante-nuptial days —And gave away your jacket- . That you would never smoke again: H6w well you worked that racket! '4cfM-.t?z . He ' ':v\£^ I swear more sweats than I did then —You know I am not Joking— • You make it, now, so hot for me That— how cart I help smoking? —(Charles *.lcllvalno in The Bohemian for August. : Jealftusy — Miss Gay: I hear Ethel Is going to marry a , wealthy ' artist! Brother oi the brush: Yes; but he's a poor paintei for all that!— Sketchy Bits. }'-.;-';:<r;''- "Bound to m. cur." : WO«Tr-W-P-r-kl Da.f» * funny word. I tuiwt «ft * dictionary M r took It UP Pi-Llnes and HcMli The Difference "You wm to hato that fellow, «lr," tfe *»ld to wealthy Dart; "Vet onrc you * n |tl he was a youth Quite after your, own heart." ■"Twh* Ituf," tho wealthy Dnrt repllftd.^ "It h«d done Ilko hft oughfer, Id Hill bet but the heart lie wnnli Right now in of my daughter!" Candidates' cigars are the real elee-" 1 Inn frauds. HeanU has discarded the ton hat for. thr slouch, it being more in line With his personality. As to this move for whlskerlesn milk men, why not make 'cm baldhcaded also? •Palm-Any thing Irt^thege medium*' pretentious? Pepper— Yes, good moriey. When tho Htnndarfl Oil get* Ida Tar. bell on the stand it might get even by asking her age, Old Harry Walk Homer lfarry Pngc. the well known theatrl. ral manager. In Ht home this week with pore feet.— White Hall (111.) Repub lican, tl Ik pnßl<>r to head the ticket than to foot the bills. — - . Philadelphia is exrltcd over finding a. lot of nucl«nt cells. Any sell is ancient when Philadelphia wakes up to it. \lparot or hearsed, It means the same thing In the end. Orange— Whnt do you do wllh all the doctorß and lawyers turned out? Lemon— They take us in. New laws arc proposed for Cuba. Why not let It Icaru to keep tho old ones? "Vice President Fairbanks warmly welcomed," says the Washington Post. Fairbanks? Warmly? Chet Funkhouser Keeping CooU The writer recently received a letter from Chester O. Funkhouser, who • is located at Fort Egbert, Alaska, with the United States army. Mr. Funk houser formerly resided here and has many friends who will no doubt bA pleased to learn that Is is enjOylng the best of health. The merfiury centers around 80 gegrees bel6w zero where ho is nOw located.-'-Lafayetle (Ind.) Joufr- Malne wants a new way to measure lobsters without pulling their tails. - In New York they pull their legs. ~.<A ft *■*"— - ■ " ■ .' Might make Taft provincial governor of New York now. Poppy— "Why do men -n-fio come homft early hav-3 so much trouble seeing the keyhole? ' t • Magnolia— The darkest hour Is just before dawn, dear. \ -■;'-.'■ ■ . - . • — - .> :.v..v A New York motor collision is" at tributed to a cigar. Some cigars ■ are bad enough for such a. catastrophe. Yet no burglar was enriched by jewels filched from an actress-Hiottthat you ever hear of. . . . -i •; >~H If Hearst were elected president would he make It the Yellow House? j ...;,(' . The Dazzling BlbrideVrrHer f.\ta :^:. ("Dazzling blonde Slopes"— Newspatvfr' headline). . , Why do they always place the blame upon a "dazzling .blonde?." ! •-/•""' Are we of scandal and of fault t-onslfl ersdl the more fond ',','. Than are the girls of raven locks, or Titian, or plain red? Are we supposed, of lighter hue, to have dark souls Instead? .; <■ ■■'.■; ... »■ .' Why, when a man elopes, does he select a "dazzling blond*?" ■ :[-' -X. '^'"fi> Why does he pick a fair haired girl when he would go bey6nd The laws laid down? What fascinates him In our hair of gold Or sunshine, that he oulck succumb?, anfl gets wlthbut. the foia? We are not worse than other girls whose heads are dull and dark; Yet ftver since the -world began, we've . kindled the bad spark In men who would transgress, 'tis said. I don't knbw why — do you? __..'.' Pray. tell me what they see in us that alters all their view. . '-■ j rr t > "A net to catch a heart within." they call .our sunny hair—, Yet -who's to blame because a God has. . made us all too fair? ' . - ; Nay, nay: we blondes crave judgment just: perhaps because'we're few. It seems that wo are oftener the vic tims that mfcn "do." N Wo are as good as those whose heads are crowned by "midnight tress; We are as sweet — we are as dear; aa many men us bless. Then pray refrain from marking; us as - creatures qulto beyond Tho pals of human faith and trust, be cause our locks are blonde! .'-v • — W. H. C. TRUE AMERICANISM True Americanism Is this To believe that the inalienable rights of man to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness are given by God. To believe that any form of power that tramples on these rights Is unjust. To bellevo that taxation without rep resentation is tyranny, that govern ment must rest upon the consent lof the governed, and that the people should choose their own rulers. * To believe that freedom must be safe. guarded by law and order, andtha't th« end of freedom is fair play for wn. To believe not in a forced equality of conditions and estates, but in a truo equalization of burdens, privileges and opportunities. , To believe that the selfish interests of. persons classen and sections must be subordinated to the welfare of tho. commonwealth. ■ To believe that union Is as much a human necessity as liberty is a dlvlno gift. , To believe, not that, all people are good, but that the way to make them better is to trust the whole people. • ' To believe that a free state should offer an asylum to the oppressed, and an example of virtue, nobrlety and fair dealing to all natlomi! To believe that for the existence and perpetuity of such a state a man should be willing to give his whole service. In property. In labor and In life.— Henry Van Dyke, In Harper's Magaelnn. •_. . , : , IBk^tfjff W^ffi^SSMltf*r phons nElyl HW JBH H *"1 TB^^i^^ Ail RL ft^^ ~S^" B road mt| yf^" IuCNTISTS. Open c'vrnlnrs till 8:10; Sundays 9 to 12.