Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel], January 14, 1907, Page 4, Image 4

About Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1900-1911

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4
LOS ANGELES HERALD
nr tub fMHtAI t» company
» IT1»?IK O. FlltXATiOlt frralfleiit
UOIIT. M. toot . . . fß4tt*elal in«mi*»t
» , It. Idi nTI Hn«ln»«« Maimgef
OLDEST MnnNINO TAPER IN
LOS ANQKLEB.
|*M__N *><•♦. 9, ISTB Thirty-four** r,,,,
Chamber of Commerce nnlliUng.
T KLKPHONEa-Bun««t Ff«ss 11 ilome
Th» Herald.
The only Democratic newspaper In
Southern California receiving the full
Associated Press reports. __^
NEWS BBRVIi i Member of the A«so
rintp.i Press, receiving Its full report.
averaging 25,000 words n Any.
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Potter building. New York; 8U Boyce
building. Chicago. __,
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Entered .it postofflce, Los Angeles, Hi
second-class matter. _________
THE IIKKAMi IN SAN FHANCISCO
AND OAKLAND— Los Angeies and South
ern California, VlttoTl to San Frnnclsco
nnd Oakland will find The Hernl I on snle
nt the news stands In the flnn Francisco
f*rrv building and on the streets In Oak
land" by Whentley and by A m ns New ajin.
Population of Los Angeles. 251,463
rirnn Up the streets.
"What, ho? HriFt seen our Bpei i'l
commlsh?"
This work wo will vote to join iflrl
Pedro nnd Los Angeles.
And now prepare for tlir> annexation
of the rr»t of the beach cities.
And apaln. there mny bo rain today,
so don't clve nway your umbrella,
It was n 'ins,, pull between J. Pluvlus
and nid 80l yesterday, but Sol won.
Conpidorlng tho weather, Los Angeles'
building record last week was a marvel.
Favorite song of the H"isi myrmi
dons: "Sailing, sailing, over the briny
main."
Maybe the Hoist "special commlsh"
dOesn't want to come home. And who
could blame him?
San Pedro and Los Angeles ai-e s:i
nearly In accord on union that the elec
tion will be a mere formality.
Engineer Llppincott is now on the
Hoist black list. He has been praising
the Owens river project abroad.
The place for that nine-foot negro is
in front of the pie counter, armed with
an elm club. Hire him, Mr, Mayor.
Of course Mayor Harper will greet
Bryan; that's one of the many advan
tages in having a Democratic mayor.
A steamship lino between San Pedro
and the Orient is assured. Bee what
consolidation with Los Angeles means.
Twenty big deals In Hill street In five
months show how active Los Angeles
realty is, and how prices are advancing.
One may sneer all one wishes at Ben
Tillman, but he has sized this negro
soldiers' discharge question up about
right.
Speaking of boulevards, wouldn't it
be well first to fix up the roads and
streets aye already have before making
new ones?
Of course the S. P. Is not enthusiastic
over the union of Li« Angeles and San
Pedro. There is nothing in it for ih"
S. P., y'see.
The general land office agent seems
almost a bogey man: his transfer to
California has sent cold shivers down
more than one spine.
The great beauty about the Sabbath
is that the legislature Is never in ses
sion then. Also, that's another cauße
for rendering thanks,
it is all right for the .lews In America
to defy RUBSIn, as i of them urges,
but the Jews in Russia seem to have
hard luck along that line.
Long Beachers warn more fire protec
tion, it I g Beach were a part of Loa
i hit would be a simple matter
to arrange. Bee the point?
A tootwalk through the North Hill
street tunnels Bhould be mode pan. of
the agreement, and tho new oi dlnui s
should contain this proviso.
One would hardly think Urn neavlj
lo.oou cat lives wi nt out I _o Vngeli
during this month so far, Vet figure it
out — DTi' eats dead with nlu
jloiHt, v 'no In bo cx i t in gett Ing out
relief expeditions, should gend one ufter
his mvn "special L-oinmlfih," v h
to be pretty badly up
1OV\.
Hy all means extend Klynl v
impro\ ements. This is uin adj
tlie most beautiful and unique parks in
the world, and II should be in ■
more so.
Put the chain gang lii work in (Irifllih
park and build barracks there for it.
Then that great i retch of beauty will
become more available to the people for
whom il ixiHtM.
The Herald asserted some weeks ago
that Hiii'iiinan hail bought Venue, it
is now admitted by the other papers,
Keaiiy, to get the news whan it is fresh
you rnuut read The Herald,
San i >ii'K<> i» promised aiiothei theater,
il Ih to lie hoped thai cohipanies nni.t
in_ to play there WOn'l b-ttVB to hiili
mlL thin oiicriiiKh In .i I
In .ids.. now.
The (act that '■'■■ dead cats wore
liuulod away from Lou Angelvs Hlnee
Nib Yenr'H and thnt euih cul hud nine
lives to give up, makes a record of linn
tality something awful Id it. gr< utneag,
SPNATOR BFI.I. IS RIGHT
Announcement Is made that State
Senator Dell of Pasadena, and Los An
geles will this week Introduce a bill In
the assembly to abolish the state board
of railway commissioners of California.
And the senator Is right. That boArd,
provided for In the constitution because
of popular demand, was by the railroad
lnfluence shorn of power and authority
in law, Blnce Its establishment it hns
ever hern merely a soft snap for rail
way pets .'in. l corporation favorites, ex
cept In one or two well known In
stances. Its members have not even had
the decency to compile i few railroad
or shipping statistics to cause in eH
cuse for drawing their large salaries,
The law docs not requlro them to do
much, It Is true, but they have dono
even less than the law allows.
ln eastern '"I middle western ttßtel
(he boards of railroad commissioners
are not creatures of the constitution,
but of the statutes, and their duties me
biennially enlarged so that they hnve
come to represent the people in a most
advantageous way, having nuthorlty to
fix rates within the state limits, to In
spect railway trackage, to Inquire Into
railway accident! nnd to generally over
see and superintend the railway busi
ness ns agents of the people. One of
the most Important powers and duties
devolved upon them in many states ii
that of preventing freight discrimina
tions, him) they constitute a court simi
lar to that of the federal Interstate
commerce commission, where shippers
may file complaint nnd secure redress.
Such were the pui|Mises of thp people
of ('nllfornln In eitabflihlni n railway
commlaalon In this state, but up uaual
the railroad Influence proved powerful
enough to prevent the commission from
having many poweri or duties.
it must be remembered, however, thai
in establishing tho state board of rail
way commissioners the constitution ex
pressly provided Hint "said commis
sioners shall have the power, and it
Shall be their duty, to pMnbllsh rates of
charges for the transportation of pas-
Bengers nnd freight by railroad or other
transportation companies, and publish
the same, from time to time, with such
changes as they may make; to examine
the books, records and papers of all
railroad or Other transportation rom
panles, nnd tor this purpose they sh.-'ii
have power to issue subpoenas und all
other necessary process; to heat- and
determine complaints aßjiinst railroad
and other transportation companies."
etc. "In all controversies," pays the
constitution, "civil or criminal, the
rates of fares and freights established
by said commission Pliull he deemed
conclusively just and reasonable."
What lias the board of railroad com
missioners ever done about all these
constitutional provisions? Simply noth
ing. What shipper ever complains to
this board as to freight rates or dis
crlmlnations? And what would happen
if he did so conipain? Nothing, of
course, for the railroads select and elect
the members of that board and they see
to it that nothing is done, while the
assembly sees to it that no annoying
laws are enacted to enforce and carry
out the constitutional provisions.
In his last message Governor Pardee
says to the legislature: "If the Cali
fornia commission cannot be made more
useful than it is, it should be abolished."
And the governor reports that "during
the past two years not more than a
dozen more or less trifling complaints
have been brought to the attention of
the commissioners."
Probably the board cannot be abol
ished, Fine hy the adoption of a consti
tutional amendment, but, In the lan
guage of Governor Pardee, it should
certainly be abolished if it cannot be
made more useful.
A LESSON OF THE SALTON SEA
E. H. Harrlman looms pretty large
on the horizon just now, He is the
Bubjeci of a special investigation by
the interstate commerce commission
1" ause, so it is said, he holds In the
hoilow- of his hand all the railroads of
the southwest, with a goodly part of all
those that gridiron the east, and
divides with J. J, Hill the complete
control of the Pai Iflc coast. It is held
thai Mr. Harrlman Is becoming aito
gether too powerful and that it Is time
that he were chi eked.
All Of this may lie title; doubtless i ; .
Mi. Harrlman Is a very powerful man,
He gives orders on more miles of rail
road than do, s nny other man on earth,
He haa a stronger finger on the pulse
of mom tai y affairs than hi i Rocke
(< Her or Morgan. Ji- is the
t'oiossus of Roads.
And yet Mr. Harrimau lias one woe,
oik' contest, thai makes him groan In
spirit and shows him as In a look
ing glacis how altogether puny arid In
significant a mere man Is, Down In
Southern California and Northern
Mexico is a river, a pitifully Inade
quate, river of small now and no trans
portation Importance, that Is giving
Mi. HaiTlnmn the sharpest battle of hi
life. More than that, ii la putting up
ii fight tliiil hits entirely floored thlK
financial Riant; ho Is completely
knocked out by It. The tawny, acrid
Colorado i Ivor has lime after line
wiped Mr. iiii nan's Southern Pa
cific! railroad denr off the map, and nil
the millions lit dollars and thousands
of men lie lias thrown Into the breach
have simply widened It, 111. Colorado
ls as uuconquered now us it was the
first day it cut Mr", iman'H dikes
and recreated the tfalum Hen. And It
|i likely to be for many years to come,
Yes, Mr. Harrlman is a very power
ful man— ln somu Way* II- . ail nod,
and rates go up or down on halt the
loads in the United States.. He can
wink, and lo.ono men are out of jobs In
h twinkle, ii- can owl arid paper
fortunes iii Wall lit reel fade Into .moke
or riwe llku the tides of ocean at flood,
a very powerful man is Mr. Harrlman
•—with things thai men create. Bui the
Colorado flyer I'au cut his dike, in a
night and give, him a battle that ho
cannot win at any cost.
wiiai how '.' That matii
itlP-r all, i., l;u«el> a mnii-iiMde
cicutui-. Jle is Inflated tliKiutjU the
LOS ANGELES HERALD: MONDAY MORNING, JANUARY 14. 190?.
love or fear or support of his fellows.
He Id "great" because others are nf rnld
of him or admire him. Hp is powerful
because they follow. lift Is an Artificial,
trumped-up power, held up by means
of «p*>ruln tinn" and surmises. Hut let
nature take, a hand— old Dame Nature,
that knows nor I>nr« any human
creaturee — nnd what becomes of this
magician among us by our own con
jurations? He becomes as petty and
puny as any wayside wanderer.
The government Is having some
trouble curbing the ambitions of this
Mr. Harrlmnn; It Is making quite I
fuss about it. Let the government
learn the lesson of the Colorado river
nnd the s.ilton sen— that a power that
lt possesses Is Irresistible ns soon as
it breaks through the dikes that man
has built for It; but an long as It Is
confined It Is too tamo for any use.
The president tins recommended to
congress that the government take
hold of the S.ilton son and do that
which Mr. Harrlman has frilled to do —
control It — as well us control Mr. Harrl
man. The government has the power
and should fool Impelled to do both.
SIDE-STEPPING GOVERNOR
lt would be difficult to find a single
recommendation In Governor Oillett's
message that is not subsequently qual
ified or modified. The* governor ■■]<-
pears to be mightily afraid of % taking
ii determined stand on any public is
sue. Up seems to seek a position
astride the fence where he may fin
ally alight on either side, ns may better
suit his convenience or Interest.
The handling of thp direct primary
olpotlon question hy tho governor shows
an pxnmplc In pnlnt. The subject has
been thoroughly considered hy tho vot
ers nf this stntp, nnri the favorable
pxprp?slons of opinion hnve been nl
mOSt unanimous, hnrrlnjr, of Course, tho
politico-railway machine— the so-called
"organisation." This highly Important
question, which the governor would
hnve advocated in strong terms If he
reflected the wishes of the people, ia
straddled ns fairly as the povernor
ever bostrode a burro in the wilds of
Hutnboldt county.
Notice this example of gubernatorial
flimflam: "The direct primary law is
being discussed somewhat (sic), and
will no doubt be tnken up and consid
ered by you during the session; there
is much that can be said in favor of
a direct primary law, and there are
many good arguments made against
it." Perched nn his gubernatorial bur
ro, the governor's long less are In
touch with the ground on either side
of the direct primary question.
The governors observations on econ- |
omy In the public service of the state
are on ,i level with his views on pri
mary elections. "Every effort should
be made," says tho governor, "to pre
vent any unnecessary expenditures of
money being made." And at the very
moment that the spntence was being
read before the legislature a majority
of the members, probably, were think
ing of the graft they expected to realize
with the official aid of their political
leader in the executive chair.
The governor straddles the capital
and labor question with the infinite
grace that distinguishes his other per
formances in the message. He says:
"Capital and labor nre both organized,
and when kept within reasonable limits
and prevented from trenching upon
the rights of others can accomplish
great good and are to be encouraged."
A wonderfully illuminating observa
tion!
As an assembler of words so that
they may mean nothing, Gov. Glllett
is a notable success. The extracts from
his message quoted here are fine sam
ples of the whole document. There is
not a virile paragraph in it, from be
ginning to end. It gives the impres
sion of hesitancy and timidity through
out, as if the governor had grave mis
givings whether his sayings would en
tirely meet the approval of the "or
ganization."
It is deplorable that the proud state
(if California should have for its offi
cial head a man who seems "afraid to
say his soul's his own," together with a
legislature whose majority of members
give reason to suspect that they grad
uated as adepts In the stage hold-up
business.
One would hardly think, to hear tha
yowls from the back fences about town
every night, that '■>'- cats had been
found dead In Los Angeles already this
month. That's the record compiled by
the dead animal contractors.
A LOB Angelefi man died last week of
h broken heart, while one in New Jfovk
died of joy, Which goes to show thai
excess of either happiness or woe in bad
for a person and that the safe course
Is the moderate one, without a surplus
of i It her.
It would seem thai Mayor Harper is
right In Insisting on a foot walk in tha
Harrlman North Hill street turmoil.
People In that region should be ao
i ordi i this right, and it won't, hurt tha
railroad company's car line any.
Thai Pennsylvania preacher who
stopped a funeral long enough to bap
tize a sudden convert certainly showed
lllsI Ills sood si ni aln saving the living, even
though the dead waited, for the dead
was at least past hope.
i Inly three cities ill the Cidt.il Staled
pui up more buildings In Decemlwr
i Loa \ngelei Now Jfork, Chl«
i si i ...ins. Were m pretty (aat
company in (jur building operations, it
items.
Wouldn't It be i good Idea to star! the
■'longest greased liar In the world" to
work tracing up that "special com
inish"? lies burning up i lot of the
llotsl money, Oukcl llelney.
'iii,- reform party has won in China;
but that doesn't mean that the mdi
vidual Chinese will reform some of his
ways. Hardly.
Situ Pedro's change of heart on an
nexation Wfti decided, even a newspaper
there having switched. Why not mako
lt unanimous)'.'
WOMAN IN DIPLOMACY IS STILL STREWING WRECKS
Recent Instance* Showing How an Indiicreet or Mallcioua remlnine
m Tongue Haa Worked the Ruin of Famoua Ambaeeadora
From th(» Now York World.
Nnpoleon on n memnrnhle occasion
rotnnrkpd thnt "M>m#tlfne- two great
powers nrp on thp point of (teHtroVlng
c.-ii h other, merely hpc.iunp two silly
.indp* hnvp qimi -reled. "
Nnpolpon's vlfws were shared hy the
into Prince Bismarck, who pondemne.
In unmeasured terms petticoat activity
In aiich mutters, declaring thnt thp re
sults wove usually disastrous. In fact,
he claimed tint thi polltlenl Intrigues
of women had been n source of more
trouble to him than suiythlng plsp
throughout his long career us ambas
sador, foreign minister nnd chancellor
of the German empire.
Evidently the 1 nited states |» not
immune, t» the long list or public
men whose positions mul whose repU
tntlnns have bi en distill bid by the in
fluence of women with aspiration*—
nd prejudices the tTnlted Btates has
mule some Interesting contributions,
Two cases Of this kind limvp recently
pngiigpd tho attention noi merely of
th* im riean people, but or the entire
civilised world namely, those «r Bel
lamy Storer. the fninvr -imhnss.idor of
the United States at Vienna, and ot
sir Mortimer Durand, the nriush nm
bassador to Washington. It is perhaps
unfair to mention them In the snn>o
connection.
Differences in Two Cases
For whereas Bellamy storer allowed
himself to be g)oaded by the angry let
ter of the president tO Mrs. Storer Into
the most unpardonable indiscretions.
Sir Mortimer IMirand hns maintained.
since he received his sudden orders of
recall, the most dignified reserve and
reticence, declining to utter it single
word of ' omplnlnt, although thp treat
ment to which ho has boon subjected Is
calculated to excite tho most bitter re
sent mont.
The name of Lad* Susan Townley.
the wife of the former first secretary
and counselor of the British embassay
at Washington. Ims been mentioned ,'X
tpnslvoly in connection with bis recall)
but while she has undoubtedly been ex
tremely active and Influential in bring
ing about tho BUdden end of a hitherto
most successful and distinguished of
ficial career of close upon forty years,
the responsibility does not rest nlto
gOther with her. There are other
women concerned in the case.
When Sir Mortimer Durand arrived
in this country after having at his own
request been transferred from the Brit
ish embassy at Madrid to that at
Washington, ho found established as
dean of the diplomatic corps at Wash
ington Count Casslnl. Inasmuch as
CaSStnl had formerly been connected
with the Asiatic department of the
Russinn foreign office. Sir Mortimer,
who had for many years been at the
head of the department of foreign af
fairs and of the secret service of the
Indian government at Calcutta, wns
perfectly acquainted with the peculiar
domestic arrangements of his Musco
vite colleague. He knew that the
count's lawful wife, the Countess Cns
sini. was separated but not divorced
from her husband, and was living until
three years ago In retirement at Dres
den; that the daughter of the count
and countess, Mme. Mongden, whoso
husband was master of the household
to the late Grand Duke Sorglus. did not
hold any intercourse with hor father,
and that Count Cassinl had introduced
to Washington society his niece, the
"Countess" Cassini, who wp.s, how
ever, afterward spoken of as Mile. Cas
sinl.
The British ambassador did not look
with favor upon Mile. Casslnl, and
was known to especially dislike certain
traits of the young woman as not In
keeping with the dignities of the posi
tion in which she was placed by the
Russian ambassador.
Lady Susan in the Plot
Accordingly, Sir Mortimer Durand
and Lady Durand discouraged any
thing approaching Intimacy between
their young daughter and Mile, fas
slni. The latter deeply resented this.
Up to that time she had, despite the op
position of the Austrian ambassadress,
played a very influential role at Wash
ington. Her pranks and extravagances
Were attributed by Washington society,
which is always most indulgent where
diplomats are concerned, to Muscovite
originality.
Soon after the visit to this country of
certain Russians of rank came the ces
sation of all relations between Mile.
Casslnl and the White House. In fact,
during the last few weeks of her stay
In Washington she was to such an rx
tent boycotted by ,voi'y one that her
position became intolerable nnd she
wpnf. abroad. Count Casslnl was like
wise shortly afterward transferred to
the altogether unimportant mission of
A Moment of Laughter
SIKK THINO. ,
Hlxcn-The absconding president of
the Hide and Seek Trust Company has j,
settled in South America.
U lxon—lt— It would have been a good
thins if he hud settled In this country p .
first.
A KIKKKRKNCK.
Mr. Hoax— Arid you nay you never
beard the motht-r-ln-law Joke?
Mr. Joax -No; 1 aald 1 uevur h-_rd my
iuothui in-law Juke.
Madrid, where ho ha* never until this
day ventured to bring Mile. Catmint.
The latter, ever since Count Casslnl'a
return to Kurope, has been living In
Part*, where she not long ago attract
ed some attention Jiy becoming a con
vert to the RninKn Catholic church,
conversions or this kind being not only
a spiritual but likewise a civil offense
ln Russia, especially when the families
of government officials are concerned.
while the Duraftda had thus justi
fied theit attitude toward the Casslntt,
tho fuel I hnl they had been proved to
ho In thp right dirt not contribute to
Increase tbp good win of eithpr the
chlpf nuigistrntp Of his daughter touird
thPtn.
This was mndo known In London nnd
especially nt court, by Lndy Susnn
Townley. Nor thai Lady iusan was In
any way pcrsonn grata nt the White
House, on tho contrary, shp wns < or
dlnlly dlallked there by renson of her
uncontrollable disposition to turn
everything nnd everybody In America
Into ridicule, Her description of tlm
entertainments at the white House us
"the biggest circus In Arnerlrn" hntur
niiy soon ranched the ears of President
nd Mrs. Roosevelt; nt?o her remark!
about the various cabinet officers, their
wives nnd the lending dignltnrlos of the
fOV.I nnienl
Nothing was sacred to Lady Susan,
not even the Du rands, and the ambas
sador and his wife were unite us much
the subject of her caustic sarensms as
was the Imposing chief magistrate of
the United States and his family. Lady
Susan, as the daughter and sister of
earls, resented the superiority in rank
of Lady Durand, denouncing the latter
ns bourgeois, although as British am
bassadresa nt Madrid she had found
high favor at the most punctilious
court and with the most punctilious
aristocracy In nil Europe.
Recall of the Townleys
Fiuniiy, matters reached such a pn«is
lhnt the Townloys and the Durnr.ds
were no longer on speaking terms, the
rudeness of Lady Susan to the Durands,
and especially to their daughter during
the visit of Princess Louis and Alexan
der of Battenberg, having passed be
yond all belief, and It was quietly inti
mated to Sir Mortimer that It would be
well to transfer the Townleys to a post
more congenial to themselves than
Washington. This hint, it Is said, was
communicated by Sir Mortimer to Lon
don.
Lady Susan and hor husband wore re
called and spent the whole of last sensor.
In London, whore her sister-in-law. Mrs.
George Keppel, is persona grntlsslmn At
court. It is probable, however, that
Lady Susan would, even with the as
sistance of the fascinating Mrs. George
Keppel, have been unable to accomplish
as much as she has acHleved had it not
been for the fact that she was able to
furnish proof that the Durauds were
not in the good graces of the president
and of his eldest daughter. The result
has been that Walter Townley, who was
deceiving $4000 a year as secretary .it
Washington, has been promoted over
the heads of a number of other diplo
mats to the post of minister plenipoten
tiary at Buenos Ayres, at a salary of
$20,000 a year, a furnished house, and
other advantages, while Sir Mortimer
has suddenly been not merely recalled,
but placed on the retired list of the dip
ilomatic service.
Like a Bolt from the Blue
How little he expected anything of the
kind is perhaps best shown by the fact
that he had made all his arrangements
to spend the remainder of his diploma
tic career — that Is to say, some eight
years — in America, and that ten days
before his recall he had brought out
five footmen from England. In fact, his
recall was altogether a bolt from the
blue.
He has no fortune, and, like most
other distinguished British officials, has
considered It a matter of honor to
spend every penny of his salary and
allowances in upholding the dignity of
his government. For the last quarter
of a century, at any rate, he has been
in receipt of a salary of from $25,000
to $40,000 a year. But not having
served his full term as ambassador, it
is doubtful whether he will be consid
ered qualified for the ambassadorial
pension of $8000 a year, and may have
to be content with his Indian pension
of $6000. This, then, is the end of a
most successful and honorable official
career of thirty-eight years, of which
less than twelve months have been
spent In England; a career wrecked by
feminine intervention.
As for Bellamy Storer, the manner in
which his promising diplomatic career
i lias been wrecked by the Indiscreet zoal
'of his wife is of too recent occurrence
to need here more than passing ref
VOKES
Loßoy-Say, Charlie, won't you lend
oe five di. liars'. 1
Charley— Do<s he need It badly?
Leßoy— l should fmille! He wants to
ay back that live ho owes me!
CAN'T ESCAPE.
She— do they talk no much about
the kitchen troubles of brides? Most of
them don't ever attempt to cook.
He— Oh! yes, they da. In one way or
anotherl They all have to do a good
deal of roasting and at*wln«.
eroncp. Nobody, after the publication
of the extraordinary correspondence he.
tween the president and th« Storer*.
can entertain nny doubt as to the fact
that the latter, In exerting themselves
it the VatlcAn to secure th« red hat for
Archbishop Ireland, were convinced
that they were fulfilling the wishes of
the chief magistrate of the United
States.
Henry White's Transfer
Tn spite of all assertions to the con
trary, It Is a matter of common knowl
edge abroad and at Washington that
the transfer of Henry White from Rome
to Paris wan rendered imperative by
th« difficult situation which his wife
had 'created In the Eternal City, both
for him and for herself, by attempting
to exercise ft despotic discrimination
against grande dames of the patriciate
to whose more or less pronounced flirta
tions She took exception.
There was one lady extremely popular
lnI In Roman society to whom Prince Vie
tor of Italy, count of Tiirlnu. Is greatly
devoted. By reason of this royal In
fatuation she was barred from the
American embassy. Moreover, Mrs.
White gave additional offense by enter
taining a foreign roynl visitor to Homo
at the very moment when the universal
ly regretted Princess Del Drago, whose
husband nnd son owned the palace In
which the American embassy wns situ
ated, WHS being buried from that palace,
tho royal arrival Interrupting the for
mation of the funeral procession.
The Mnrquls do Montobpllo, who for
so ninny years represented France nt
St. Petersburg, wns deprived of his
lucrative ambassadorship, owing to the
extraordinary rudeness of his extremely
bourgeois, marquise, the daughter or a
Parisian shopkeeper, to the wives of the
French cabinet ministers on the occa
sion of the last visit of the CSar and
czarlria to France, and of their stay at
the palace of Complains,
Boxed Englishwoman's Ears
Another French "nmbussadrcßS." Hi.
high-spirited and eccentric Diichosse de
Per Sign nee Princess La Moscown,
and a granddaughter of the famous
Marshal Ney, caused the recall of her
husband from the post of ambassador
to the court of St. James by losing her
temper and boxing the purs of an Eng
lish/lady of title who had appeared at a
royal ball nt the French embassy in a
dress Identically the same as thai of the
duchess. Queen Victoria was present,
Witnessed the affair, and was so indig
nant that she Immediately requested
Napoleon 111 to withdraw the duke
from London on account of his wife.
Mine. Nasos, the beautiful Greek "am
bassadress" at Belgrade, wrecked ncr
husband's career by accepting the ad
vances of King Milan while ho was still
on the throne. Queen Natalie, aware of
the friendship between her husband and
the Hellenic beauty, declined to accord
her the customary kiss of peace at Eas
ter,, denouncing her in the presence of
the entire court as an Immoral woman.
As Queen Natalie's charges were gen
erally believed to be well-founded, tl)e
Greek envoy was recalled and shelved.
ROOSEVELT FOOLED THEM
J. R. Heckman of Somerset county
has received an interesting letter from
a friend In the canal zone, giving a
brief but much more interesting ac
count of President Roosevelt's visit to
the canal than was contained In the
dispatches. The letter follows:
"Teddy was hero and saw more In
three days than the commission haa
seen In two years. He did not go any
place they wanted to take him; he just
went where he darned please. He never
ate a meal at their banquets. He
would sneak off and eat at some of
the government boarding houses, where
they least expected him. He actually
went through mud up to his knees,
with his white suit on and It raining
In bucketfuls.
"Oh, ho fooled them. He told them
that he did not want to see the places
that were all right; It was the places
that were not right that he wanted to
see. There was not one In the bunch
that could keep up with him. He went
into nigger quarters and sat down and
talked with the niggers, and asked
them all kinds of questions. Also, he
went into the white quarters. I heard
he told officials how things had to be
from this on. Some of them went to
arguing the case, and said that such
could not be done. He simply said
that if they had no remedy he had
one.
"I heard he got mad at one place and
just raised i'nin; talked out In the
street so everybody could hour him.
You should have seen him galloping
down some of these muddy streets,
the mud Hying over his head. He
showed them how to get around." —
Philadelphia Record.
Faith and Works
Boston Girl— Do you believe in mar
riage?
Chicago Girl— Believe in it? Gee! I
practice it.— Cleveland Leader.
HIS EXPKKIBNCB.
Dlnkly- Did you ever have the sheriff
■ell you out at auction?
Wlnkly-No: but I had my thumb nail
under the hammer once.
OWKD FOR KM AUU.
Mr. Calller Down* new sh»M
make a lot of m>l««. You know th»y say
"that iqueaky bouts art never paid for.
Mr. I. M. H. Ouniua-AU bosh. If there
w «« tuiythlnf In that, . why don't my
truu»«r» and my coat and v«at »<iu<e«.k.
t oo? . , __MtfwiH2A
PMJncs aid -Hemps
Letting Him Down Easy
"t rtrfnmM." tho .•uphfnrt rmirmur«d
low, «|$P
"last night — ah, It was sweetl |i
That you said that you'd marry me. ■•I'
Confirm It, I entreat."
"Ton dreamed," the tnnldnn fnlr replied,
"That you had married mci?
'Tls rather dAmp'nlng, but dreams go
Hy contraries — you see."
A Horlln mirßron hnldn thnt It will
soon he possible to reunite t<> the body
• aetarw arm, log or head, if that i«
tho ease, tho prospect of opportunities
tO triido homts opons up nmßnlflcent
VlStaS to tho ( itizrn with more money
than hi.,!,,.,
On tho prlnrlple thnt everything Ih
poMlhle, Mr. Fnrnkrr of Ohio mny be
( onsld. red „ prrsldnntlnl possibility.
Says the naltlmoro American:
Wniit u XV ? try moat to reac " we miss,
and what wo least expect' we quickly
get. And generally 1,, the neck.
"All tho world lovps a lover," but
that may not ho the only reason why
it Ik paying so much attention to tho
('orey-Ullinan nuptials.
Dog Poisoners Rebuked
B om« poor sacrifice has taken It upon
himself to rid the community of tho
canine sped, and his thoughtless cor
rldod mind hns received an overflow
ing inspiration from the blackest In
ferno to administer poison to theso de
fenseless animals. The poison was
doubtless given for the benefit of the
curs that SO abundantly abound In this
town. Nevertheless there are other
nnd more humane ways of disposing
or theso dogs provided by village ordi
nances.—Alnsworth (Neb.) Advocate.
German astronomers assort that there
Js smoke on the moon. Presumably
the mnn in the moon Is also getting rid
of his ChriltniU clgara as fast as ho
can.
It Is suFfTosted that tho eampalgn to
evangelize the world within a genera
tion shall begin with congress. If suc
cessful there tho rest of the world will
present no serious difficulty. .
A club In Brooklyn hns decided that
marriage Is a failure. But they should
have added "in Brooklyn."
Than is in Kansas a man who Is a
minister, a doctor, an undertaker and
a dealer in tombstones We have not
henrd why he doesn't practice den
tistry.
Ye Editor Speaks Out
Colonel Ed l T rlg is under indictment
In Jeffer3on county for pointing loaded
firearms. Trip lives in Alliance and
for n time was a resident of Minerva.
He Is a big hag of wind.— Carrollton
(Ohio) Free Press.
In tho Chicago schools they are now
teaching "hugless dancing" nnd "wa
terless swimming." They will provo
quite n help to brainless pupils.
John D. Rockefeller says he forgives
those who misunderstand him. An
other function of the Almighty that
John has arrogated to himself.
Not one of them Is seeking the presi
dential nomination. They are only
sitting on the doorstep, so that It can
stumble over them when It comes out
to sec how high the sun is.
Turning to Literature
Emmet and Lawrence Haynes went
to Sunday school Sunday and got
enough literature to last them a
month, such as "Peck's Bad Roy" and
"On a Slow Train Through Arkansas."
— Sequachee (Term.) News.
Unless someone holds Richmond
Pearson Hobson there Is danger that
he will rush forth and demolish Japan
all by himself.
Mr. Harrimnn's father was a minis
ter and some people will consider that
that explains a good deal.
An exchange comes out with the
statement that "Kaiser "Wllhelm has
SOOO servants who nre two-thirds
women." We're from Missouri.
We venture the prediction that when
the income tnx arrives there will not
he ns much lying about Incomes as
there is now.
Then and Now
lie used to take "his pen In hand,"
When he would fain Indite her;
But modern man's In such a rush
He uses a typewriter.
Hp usprt to Bpnd a mercury
With dnlnty note, when donor
Of a request to go with him —
Hut now he'll only 'phone hor.
Ah, me: the world is faster now —
It's smashed most every fetter
Of time — but In "ye olden days"
We men did some things better.
— W. H. C.
THE PART THAT WILLIE GETB
When wo have turkey mint It nice,
All cooked so tine and brown!)
My pn he cuts each one a slice
An' passes it aroun'.
He privos to all of 'em (but me)
Tho part "at they selec'.
An' when I pasH my plnte, nays he:
"Ah, Willie — here's the neck!"
Ma always saya: "Oh. anythlnsr."
Hut pn gives her the breast;
An' Uncle Joo he takes the wing
(The part I like th« best);
An' f?ran'pa says: "Oh, T dunno,
11 tak«> a ictf. I spec 1 ."
An' pit, .ill sniilliii',, Hays: "Jen' an.
Come, Willie — here's the neck!"
When pn nsks Susan, what's her ch'lce
She says, "I'll have a thigh. "
Thru brother George hp K<"ts his slice
With stuffln' piled up htKh.
An' so it R-oes until, oh, clear!
Thnt turk Is mos' A wrei-k.
When pa at last says: "Willie! Herel"
—An' Willie gots tho neck.
Now. I've been thlnkln' nuite a whit.,
(I hope It ain't no sin)
Jen' spos'n' tuiks went out o" style
An' other birds cum in.
An' H'pos'n' 'mead o' turkey, pa
Hiul oHtrluh to dlasec'
I wonder would he lay, "Aha!
Here, Willie — take tho neck!"
—Puck.
He Had the Countersign
Lieut. Col. Thurston, when guard In
spector of the New York camp at
Peeksktll, approached one night a Gir
m..n sentinel, who simply looked at
him and inarched on.
•Well?" iiuiuhv.il the colonel, in
tending to remind the man of hit, duty.
"Veil, veil! Vot Iks It?"
."Don't you want the countersign?"
"No, dot's all right. ■ •. -«- feller In der
guard'n tent give It to me. 1 got It."
m ■ - ■ B«»t Bet of Taeth SO.
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U^^ "Eentists.
Op«n evenings till 8:30; Sundays » to U.
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