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■ RUBAIYAT OF THE DIETIST Wake! for the sun, with Ben Frankllnlc frown, Hu uppercut the highest roof in town; Arise! Jump out upon the cheerless floor. And take the morning bath, anil then rub down. "While yet I warmed with exerclsal heat Meheard a voice solicitous repeat: "The Breakfast Food is getting cold as ice; Why don't you hurry and come down and eat?" And aa they thundered on the chamber door I said: "I've told you fifty times before That Breakfast Food is caviare to me— I am not eating breakfast any more." Eat! If the Mind Unbreakfasted promotes All sorts of clever thinking, and just dotes On doing mental jobs, wer't not a shame To clog its workings i>d with Grandpa's Oats? As lately with a dietetic rake I lingered in the lunch-room to partake Of Necessary Nourishment—Behold! The waiter came and handed us a steak. Thf Steak! the Family Doctor's partner, viz.: The Steak, the Mother of the RheumatU And Gout, and every other old disease Tljat puts the Ignorati out of biz. "Yet Cream," say some, "or Cheese, or Milk, at least. Id needful for the Health-Foodarian feast:" Give me some Peas and Beans and Garden Sass. And darn the old Unsanitary Beast. Some Peanut Butter from a leafy cow. Six Dates, a dab of Olive Oil, and Thou Beside m« Fletcherizlng Uncooked Bread, And that's what I call Sotld Comfort now One day (an ever-memorable datel I found the place where Horace Fletcher ate; And when I asked: "What is the secret. Hod?" He said: "'Tis Masticate and Masticate. "Some from the Stack of Buckwheat Cakes are barred. And others cannot eat things Cooked in Lard; Ridiculous! Just get an appetite. Then pick out what you like and chew It hard." Ah. Horace Fletcher, just supposing you Could organize the eats of human life anew— Would you not hale the clubman from his grill, And make him eran his chowder with his chew? Reader, think not the Dietlst who knows Will let Youth's manuscript come to a close, Nay, even as all youthful MSS., His will run ad lnflnitum like those. So, Thoughtless Eater, when you get to be Decrepit at the age of eighty-three, You'll see a Lithe Old Gentleman at golf, Or running Marathons, and he'll be Me. —Puck. ■» »» MICHELANGELO'S DAWN Sailor Your eyes have penetrated to the naked end, Stared through the aching emptiness of ■pace; l-i the inexorable years, was there no friend To brlnK some thought of gladness to your face? Did you rind nothing in *.he hills and forests. fair. Nor flower, nor fern, nor cedar-tree with shade, And beauty but a mirage, mocking your despair, Long silence and shadows your answer when you prayed? 1 would that I could read what made you sad and wise. And, robed in silence, why you change con tinually, As changes come where even the great still ness lies, To those who watch, familiar with the sea. 1 think, as every generation passes by, There are some souls that keep the cool of dawn. Whose eyes on cloudy days reflect the clear blue sky. Whose feet at noon still tread a frozen lawn. The eagerness that once you surely had whs spent As seed on sand, as toll upon the sea. Did God, whose thought was In the dawn In sent. Send only that gray light to comfort thee? Ascetic, splendid dreamer, was the end of dreams alth lost, and hope that overshot the maik. Lost In th? light of fickle mountain streams. While tides were marching dawnward through the dark? —Ben Kendim in the Spectator. ■»« » Sartorial Simplicity This Is the time of year when men long for the simplicity that they can not find in the cities., which are super charged with civilization in its double distilled state. And the women, too. And to judge from some of the late fashions In swimming suits, the women, at least at the seashore, have attained almost the sartorial simplicity of Mother Eve.—San Jose Mercury and Herald. .* •-* Both Work Bacon —And doesn't her husband ever do any kitchen work? Egbert—Sure, he does. He sometimes fires the rolllng-pln back at his wife.— yunkers Statesman. LOS ANGELES HERALD SUNDAY MAGAZINE Smlft^^^T^:-:-:- ■■ ..:v:-:-:v:-::--:v;v;:v:v ■V-o ■: •:■:»■:■:■-.:■:*,■.■:■.Lv':>:':..:' : : : ..... •■■■■:■:- ■:■: ■■. :■: :■:-:■:■:■:■■■:■>:■:■■•:■: :■>:■: ■ ■■ - ' , MRS. SADIE ROSENTHAL A Charming New York Matron Who Has Been a Guest at Hotel Virginia, Long Beach, Since May 1 RISEN FROM THE DEAD Benedelio Marcello. one of the most famous Venetian composers, fell in love with a beautiful girl named Leonora Manfrottl, who married Paolo Bedanzo, a Venetian noble. She died a short time after her marriage, a victim to the harsh and jealous treatment of her hus band. Her body was laid out in state in the church of Wei Frari, and her lover actually succeeded in stealing the corpse and conveying it to a ruined crypt in one of the islands, and here he sat day and night by his lost love, singing and playing to her, as though by the force of his art he could recall her to life. Leonora had a twin sister, Eliade, who was so like her that her closest friends could scarcely distinguish them. One day Eliade heard a singer in a gondola singing so exquisitely that she traced the gondola to the deserted isl and, and there she learned later the fate of her sister's corpse and the identity of Marcello. Aided by a ser vant. Eliiade substituted herself for her sister's body, and when Marcello returned and called Leonora to awake he did not ask in vain, for apparently she rose alive from the coffin. Mar cello when he found out the delusion, was quite satisfied, and married Eliade, but his happiness was short lived, as he died a few years afterward— Weekly Telegraph. __ *^ Hit WHY IS TABLE KNIFE ROUNDED? Until the seventeenth century knife blades had pointed ends, as can be readily understood when the knife of those days was used for hunting and table purposes indiscriminately. The rounded end was introduced from Kranoe in a curious way. It happened that Cardinal Richelieu was compelled to entertain Chancellor Sequier— a vul gar and unmannerly man, who, at the close of the meal, proceeded to use his knife as a tooth Dick. This vulgar act so upset the cardinal that he ordered the end of every knife in nis posses sion to be rounded, and so great was Richelieu'! influence that the fashion was soon adopted all over the country. This is the vulgar, but nevertheless in. teresting origin of the rounded knife of today.—Tit-Bits. HARD TO KILL Anybody who has had to do with the night-prowling: cockroach knows that he is a difficult rascal to kill. Now we leain why this is. One of his frater nity, in search of something to eat, tha other day—possibly a bit of India-rub ber or an oil rag—crawled into tho high tension switch gear In the elec tric generating station at Hoe, near Plymouth. He got into a corner, and, by diverting the current, put out the lights. When found he was simply trimming His whiskers, while 2000 volts of electricity were skimming through his carcass.- -'lodern Society. CHILDREN IN ST. JAMES PARK SEPTEMBER 12, 1409. ARMLESS ARTIST'S TRIUMPH One of the few sensations of the Royal academy exhibition is a most ex cellent picture which was painted by an armless artist with a brush held be tween his teeth, says London Opinion. This remarkable feat has been achieved by Bertram Ulles, who lost both his arms in a tramcar accident when he was only 8 years old. Before this ter rible occurrence Mr. Hiles had shown a marked talent for drawing- Determined not to be beaten, he set to work to train his mouth to hold and use a pen cil, and after several years of constant nractice he could write and draw bet ter than most boys of his age. At the age of 10 he gained a "first class excel lent" in freehand drawing at the School of Art in Bristol, his native city. Later on he obtained such marvelous control of his mouth and the muscles of his neck that his work won for him a national scholarship valued at 100 guineas, and a number of valuable prizes carried off in open competition at South Kensington. After studying in Paris Mr. Hiles began a successful artistic career in London. His pictures found ready purchasers, among his patrons being Queen Victoria; and he exhibited constantly at the Royal So ciety of British Artists, the Royal In stitute of Painters In Water Colors, the Dudley gallery and other well known galleries. Mr. Hiles' canvases art* small, as a rule, but he has painted landscapes as large as four feet by two feet. His extraordinary career, to quote a leading art authority, "reveals a strength of character almost unique In the annals of art." THE COOK'S FAULT One of the most annoying things about swans is that they live to an extremely great age, and that it is impossible for the ordinary observer to guess what their years may be. Presi dent Grover Cleveland once had an amusing experience with some swans, according to a writer in the American Magazine. He had been in the south, shooting, and brought home a number of wild swaps, one of which he sent to each membei of his cabinet, and also to some other associates. "All the boys," said Mr. Cleveland, "thanked me politely for having re membered them, but none of them seemed to have much to say about how they enjoyed the birds. "Carlisle, I found, had his cooked on a night when he was dining out. Another, when I asked him, said he hoped I wouldn't mind, but he had sent his home to his old mother. "Thurber didn't mention that he had received his bird at all for two days. Finally I asked him about it. " 'Thurber, did you get that swan all right?' " 'Yes, sir, oh, yes, I got the swan all right, thank you,' and he bent over his desk and seemed very busy. " 'Fine bird," I said. " 'Yes, sir, fine bird,' and he went on working. " 'Enjoy eating him, Thurber?' "He waited a minute, and then he said: 'Well, sir, I guess they didn't cook him right at my house. They only cooked him two days,' and he went on working without cracking a smile." Begin* Sooner Bacon —When a man marries, his troubles begin. Egbert—Oh, well, with some fellows it begins as soon as they ask the girl's rather.—Yonkers Statesman.